How to Defeat Victim Mentality
How to Defeat Victim Mentality After Your Husband Cheated on You: Stop The Pain From Eating Away at Your Soul, Begin to Live Like a Survivor.
Just because he cheated, doesn't mean that it was something you did, or didn't do.
But it's up to you to make these changes that are so necessary to start leading a happier, more fulfilling life.
You can shut off those negative voices in you head that are telling you that you're no good, or you deserve whatever bad things happen to you.
Here are some things you should start applying into your everyday practices if you truly want to start living like a survivor.
How to Change Your RoleFrom Being a Victim, to That of Being a Survivor.
Open up Your MindRealize that you can change your life if you choose to.
You can do anything in life that you want, even if it just means taking baby steps.
Regain your independence and take satisfaction in all of the little things that life has to offer.
Find Your Confidence You've made it this far, you can make it a lot farther.
Recognize all of the achievements you have made in life so far and take pride in them.
Always remember that you are the baddest chick on this planet and that you have so much to offer to the world.
Show Your Confidence to OthersDon't be afraid to show others these accomplishments.
It's not boasting, it's pride.
You surpassed the company's quota margin, you made an awesome speech, you got your kids dressed, fed and on the bus on time.
It really doesn't matter what it is, you did it and you should feel good about it.
Stay PositiveReplace the negative tapes in your mind with positive, self-affirming messages.
The fact that your husband was unfaithful doesn't mean that it's the end of the world and you will survive.
Whatever you decide to do in the future, you have the power and capabilities to make it happen.
Finish The Tasks You StartUse a clock, or a calendar to keep yourself on schedule.
When you complete a task, it will help to remind you of how much you can actually accomplish when you put your mind to it.
Take ResponsibilityRemember that you alone are responsible for your life.
Yes, he cheated on you, but you are the queen of your kingdom. Don't let him dictate the way you rule it.
You alone are responsible for your own happiness, don't ever forget that.
Avoid Blaming Others
For the outcome of your life. Maybe your parents lacked nurturing skills or were even abusive.
But youre in charge now.
Youre an independent adult who can take steps to ensure youre safe. Make your own life choices.
Love Yourself Right NowAnd remember to do this throughout your day.
Identify what you need to feel complete and surround yourself with these positive thoughts and images.
You are a special woman that was put on this planet for a purpose. That purpose does not include feeling hurt, angry, or abandoned
Adopt a New MantraSomething as simple as, "I'm worth it," or "I'm a survivor" silently, or vocally expressed, will help you to stay on track.
Write it down and put it on your refrigerator, or mirror that you look at each morning as a reminder.
Remind Yourself That You Don't Have Control Over His Actions
No matter how much we like to believe that we have control over the situation, other people's behaviors are something that are out of our power.
One thing that we do have 100% of control over however, is how we react to the situation at hand. It's all how we perceive things.
Keep a Diary or JournalWrite down your thoughts and feelings, it will help you find out more about your true emotions and as you reflect upon these feelings later, will help you better interpret them.
It doesn't have to be a long, drawn out narration, sometimes just a sentence or two can document how you feel.
When you look back upon it, you can gain a better understanding of that day and how it made you feel. Try it, it works.
Share your true feelingsExpress your emotions to those around you. Don't keep them bottled up because you think no one cares, or they aren't important.
Tell your husband how much he hurt you and how angry, or betrayed you feel. Make him understand.
Also, even though you might not want to do it, try to listen as well.
Ask those you trust for feedbackAsk others for their feedback on how you are feeling. When they give this feedback, take it all into consideration to better help you understand how you're feeling.
It might not always be the sort of thing you want to hear at the moment, but perhaps in retrospect, it can give you a better understanding of what it is that is really going on.
Tell yourself that its okay to experience some discomfortRecognize that it's totally appropriate to feel angry, sad, or any other of the emotions that bring you discomfort.
When your spouse that you love betrays you, it's natural. Feelings aren't good, nor bad, they are simply feelings and you are entitled to your own.
Never feel embarrassed, or ashamed for how you feel at any given moment.
Stay focused When you stay centered on your options, choices, emotions, and behaviors, youll find life gets much easier.
The past is something we can never regain and the future is something of which we have no guarantee of. There is only now.
Seek professional help if you need itRemember that there are professionals available to help you, should you need them. Maybe a therapist, or counselor can help.
If you are religious, speak to your priest, or pastor. They would be happy to assist you I'm sure.
There are also a variety of support groups out there that can aid with the situation, if nothing else but reassuring you that you are not alone.
Commit to applying these techniquesFREE Printable Worksheet.
This worksheet is designed to help you identify if youre living as a victim, and to learn new ways to live with consciousness and purpose. You can choose to be a survivor, starting now.
In your daily life and unleash the survivor thats inside of you!