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DualcareercommutercouplesFromWikipedia,thefreeencyclopedia

Commutercouplesareasubsetofdualcareercouples"inwhichbothpartnerspursuecareerswhilemaintainingseparateresidencesindifferentgeographiclocations".[1]

GilbertandRachlinaddressthedifferencebetweendualearnerfamiliesanddualcareerfamilies,distinguishingthatdualearnercouplesarethoseinwhichbothspousesareearningforthefamily,butoneorbothofthemconsidertheiroccupationalinvolvementasajob.Jobsareunlikecareersinthattheydonotrequireextensivetrainingorcommitment.Indualearnercouples,onespouse'sworkisgenerallyconsideredsecondary.Dualcareercouplesarefamiliesinwhich"bothheadsofhouseholdpursuecareersandatthesametimemaintainafamilylifetogether".[2]Bothhavehighdegreesofcommitmenttotheircareers,andneitherpartner'scareeristhoughttobemoreimportantthanthatoftheother.[3]

Contents

1Historicalbackground1.1Statistics1.2Formationofcommutercouples1.3Characteristics1.4Advantages1.5Disadvantages

2Contributingfactors2.1Roleconflict2.2Socialcomparison2.3Adjustingversusestablishedcouples

3Becomingacommutercouple3.1Attachmenttheoryandperceivedrelationshipquality

3.1.1Attachmenttheory3.1.2Perceivedlongdistancerelationshipquality3.1.3Decisionmakingprocesses

4Practicalimplications5Seealso6References

Historicalbackground

Statistics

IntheUnitedStates,statisticsfromasearlyas1989reportthat53%ofmarriedhouseholdsweredualearnercouples.By1996,thepercentofdualearnercouplesgrewto61%.Accordingtodatafrom1989,approximately7millionemployees(15%to20%ofalldualearnermarriages)wereclassifiedasdualcareercouples.[4]By2003,U.S.workerstakemorethan400millionlongdistancebusinesstrips(i.e.,tripsover50miles)eachyear.[5]Commutermarriagesareontherise,withrecentestimatesindicatingthatasmanyas3millionAmericansresideindifferentlocationsfromtheirspouses.[6]



Inothercountries,theprevalenceofdualcareercouplesisrelativelylowcomparedtotheU.S.AccordingtoGermanresearchonacademicallyeducatedcouples,lessthanonethirdofthesecoupleshadbothpartnerspursuingafulltimeprofessionaloccupation.ASwissstudyfoundthatonly10percentofcoupleshadbothpartnersfollowingupwardcareers.ThisproportionissimilartotheonefoundforcouplesinItaly,onthebasisofoccupationalclassesofemployedhusbandsandwives.[7]

Formationofcommutercouples

Theincreaseinwomenscareeropportunitiesalsoincreasestheproblemsofcouplespursuingtwocareersinthesameplace,andcancauseconflictregardingwhichspousescareershouldtakeprecedence.[8]Onemajorconcernfordualcareercouplesisfindingemploymentinthesamegeographiclocation.Onepartnerusuallycompromisesbytakingalessdesirablejobsothattheothercantakeapositionthatmightfurtherhisorhercareer.However,ifthiscompromisecannotbereached,theoptionofcommutingcanbetheresult,wherebothspousesenjoyhighlydesirablejobsatthesacrificeofmaintainingseparateresidences.[9]

Inthedefinitionofdualcareercommutercouples,theworkpursuedbyeachmemberofthecouplerequires1)ahighdegreeofcommitmentandspecialtrainingwithincreasingdegreesofresponsibility(thisincludesstudentspursuinganadvancededucationaldegree)and2)thatthecouplemaintainhomesinseparategeographiclocations.Travelingsalesorbusinessworkers,militarypersonnel,migrantworkers,andconstructionandtradeworkerswholeavehomeforvariouslengthsoftimearenotincludedinthedefinition.Whencouplesshareahomeandoneorbothmemberscommutelongdistancestoworkeachdayorcouplesimmigratingatseparatetimes,theyarealsonotincludedinthisdefinition.[2][10]

Thedyadofcommutercouplesistypicallycomposedofthe"commuter",whomovestoasecondaryresidenceforwork,andthe"noncommuter",whostaysattheprimaryresidence.[1]Othertermsforthelifestylearemarriedsingles,commutermarriages,commuterfamilies,commuterlifestyle,andcommuterrelationships.

Characteristics

Researchrevealsthatmostcommutercoupleshaveahighlevelofeducationandthatbothpartnershaveprofessionalorexecutivecareers.Mostarebetweentheagesof25to65,themeanagebeingmidtolatethirties.Fortyto50%ofcommutercoupleshavechildren,andmorethan50%havebeenmarriedformorethan9years.[9]Mostofcommutercouplesarewithadvanceddegreesandareheavilyinvolvedintheircareers.[11]Themostattractivefactorofajobforcommutercouplesisthejobeducationmatch.[12]

Advantages

Advantagesofthecommutinglifestyleareidentifiedas1)increasedcareeropportunities,2)professionalautonomy,3)increasedindependence,4)increasedappreciationoftimetogether,5)decreasedfocusondisagreements,and6)decreasedfrequencyofarguments.[13][14][15]

Disadvantages

Disadvantagesofbeingcommutingcouplesare1)financialproblems2)loneliness3)lackofpersonalandprofessionalsupportsystemduetoalackoftimetobuildandmaintaintheserelationships4)negativeattitudesfromfriends,family,coworkers,andsociety5)increasedtensioninmarriageandthe



family6)decreasedsatisfactionwithsexlife7)missedimportantfamilymomentsanddaytodayexperiencesand8)lackofsociallife,hobbies,andindividualprojects.[13][14][15][16]

Contributingfactors

Roleconflict

Therehasbeeninconsistentevidenceinrelationtoroleconflictindualcareercommutercouples.Roleconflict,accordingtoBiddle,istheconcurrentappearanceoftwoormoreincompatibleexpectationsforthebehaviorofaperson,andwhenapersonexperiencesroleconflict,itcanhavenegativeeffectsonmultipleaspectsoftheirlives,includingdecreasedjobperformanceanddecreasedcommitmenttoanorganization.[17]Incontrasttothatdefinition,findingshaveshownthatmanycommutersfindtheirlifestylebeneficialinthatitallowsthemtopursuetheircareerswithouthavingtodealwithdailyfamilydistractions,andalsogivesthemasenseofautonomy.Thisabilitytocompartmentalizetherolestheindividualplaysmayleadtomoreworklifesatisfaction,supportedbyfindingsthatcommutercouplesgenerallyhadmoreworklifesatisfactionthandualcareercouplesinasingleresidence.[1]However,therearestillchallengesfacedbycommutercouplesintheirdifferentroles.Itwouldseemthatsuchgreatcompartmentalizationcanleadsomeindividualstostrugglewithbalancingboththeirworkandfamilyrolesandtheresponsibilitiesforeach[16]almosthalfofcommutercouplesstudiedbyAndersonreportedthattheyrarelyfeltthattheyhadagoodbalancebetweenjobandfamily.Also,familieswhoarecommutersarethoughttobecomemorecompetentintheirperformanceofallfamilyrelatedtasks,suggestingthatthereisalesstraditionaldivisionoflaborbetweenthehusbandandwife.[9]However,AndersonandSpruillfoundthatevenincommutercouples,mosttraditionalhouseholdtaskswerestillperformedbywomen,whiletaskssuchashouseholdmaintenanceandlawnmowingwereperformedbymen.[9]Thesefindingssuggestthatcommutercouplesmaystillberelativelytraditionalintheirroledivisionsfromagenderperspective.

Socialcomparison

AccordingtoFestinger(1954)andSocialComparisonTheory,whenthereisnoobjectiveassessmentforonesabilitiesoropinions,onewillcomparethemselvestootherswhoareseentobesimilar.Itisalsosaidthatwhenothershaveadifferenceinabilitiesoropinions,onewhoiscomparingthemselveswillalmostalwaysmovetheirideaofwhatabilitiesoropinionsareappropriateclosertothecomparisonothers.[18]Inlinewiththistheory,itmakessensethatcommutercoupleswouldtrytocomparethemselvestoothermarriedcouples,butitwilloftenposeproblemsforthembecausetheirrelationshipsdodifferinmanyways.Whencommutercouplescomparethemselvestotraditionalmarriages,itcancausethemalotofdiscomfort.[19]Thisisalsotrueforsocietysexpectationsofacommutercoupleifsocietycomparesthemtotraditionalcouples,theyrefrainfromaddressingimportantaspectsoftherelationship,andconsequentlylackasolidunderstanding.Itwasfoundthatpartnerswhofeltthattheirpeersthoughtthatthecommutinglifestylewasthebeginningofadivorceexperiencedmorestress.[16]

Adjustingversusestablishedcouples

"Adjusting"couplesaregenerallyyoungerwithfewornochildren,andtheyexperiencetheseparationearlierintheirmarriage.Itseemsthatyoungerwivesgenerallystrugglemorewiththeguiltthattheirhusbandsaredisadvantagedinsomeway,andyounghusbandstendtofeelasenseoflossincomparisontoatraditionalhusband.Thesecouplesoftenexperiencemorestressovertheconflictofwhosecareerismoreimportantthanthestressofbeingapart.



"Established"couplesaregenerallyolder,havebeenmarriedlonger,andhavechildren.Withthesecouples,muchofthestresscomesfromchildcare.Generally,husbandswillfeelsomeresentmentintheincreaseinresponsibilitiesforthechildren,whilethewivesfeelguiltyabouttheirlessenedinvolvementintheirchildrenslives.[19]

Becomingacommutercouple

Attachmenttheoryandperceivedrelationshipquality

Attachmenttheory

Inimportantromanticrelationships,attachmentreferstostrongemotionalbondingandthefeelingofbeingsecure.[20]Tomaintainthesecurityfeelings,individualsstayinacomfortablerangeofproximitytotheirpartner.[21]Undercertaincircumstances,evenseparationduetoplannedtravelevokesconcernsofthepartnersinaccessibility.[22]Thisinaccessibilitymaybeassociatedwithanxiety,loneliness,andyearningforthepartner.Throughpsychological(e.g.,internalrepresentation),symbolic(e.g.,pictures),orphysicalproximitygainingaccessibility,individualscalmdownandrestoresecurity.Threedifferentattachmentstylesareidentifiedbyattachmentresearchers:[23]secure,avoidant,andanxietyattached.Thosewhoaresecurelyattachedhavepositiveviewsoftheselfandtheirpartner,andareconfidentwhenseekingproximitytothepartner.Avoidantindividuals,withtwosubtypes,generallysuppressdesiresofseekingforpartners.Specifically,dismissingavoidantindividualshaveapositiveselfworth,buthaveanegativeviewofthepartner,andpreferlowemotionalinvolvement.Fearfulavoidantshavenegativeviewsofboththeselfandthepartnerandfearrejection.Incontrast,individualswithanxietyattachmentstylesarehyperactive,continuouslyseekingandattemptingtomaintainpartnerproximity.Thosewhohaveanxiousattachmentstyleshavenegativeselfviews,andthepartnerisconsideredessentialtoselfworthbutinsufficientlyaccessible.TheRelationshipQuestionnairebyBartholomewandHorowitz(1991)[24]andExperienceinCloseRelationshipScalebyBrennan,Clark,andShaver(1998)[25]aretwocommonlyusedmeasurementsforattachmentstyle.TheRelationshipQuestionnaireassessattachmentstylebycrossingthepositiveornegativeviewofselfandpartner.Thisquestionnaireprovidesthecategoricaldata,thatmeanstocategorizeparticipantsintofourattachmentstyleswithoutanyscores.TheExperienceinCloseRelationshipScaleontheotherhand,measuresonasevenpointscale.Peoplewithlowerscoresaretowardtheattachmentavoidanceend,andpeoplewithhigherscoresaremorelikelytobeattachmentanxiousstyle.Thisscaleprovidesquantitativeinformationaboutattachmentstyle.Thoughthetwoscalescanbeusedseparately,theymakeupthecategoricalandintervalpartforeachother.Thus,itisrecommendedtousebothofthem.[26]Thecombinationofbothscaleshavebeenprovenvalidinmeasuringattachmentstyles.[27]

Perceivedlongdistancerelationshipquality

Secureattachmentisrelatedtopositiverelationshipqualities(e.g.,satisfactioncommitment).[23]Althoughitmayseemcounterintuitive,longdistancerelationshipsbetweensecurelyattachedindividualsareperceivedtobesimilarinrelationshipqualitytorelationshipsofsecurelyattachedindividualswhoaregeographicallyclose.Avoidantandanxiousattachmentstyleindividualswhoareinvolvedinlongdistancerelationshipsperceivetheirrelationshipaslowerqualitythanavoidantandanxiousindividualsingeographicallycloserelationships.Commutercouplesrelationshipqualityareexpectedtodifferbasedontheindividualsattachmentstyles.[26]Recently,researchfoundthatcommutercoupleswhomeetonamonthlybase(i.e.,meetmorethanonceamonth)relationshipqualitywasinfluencedbytheseparation.[28]



Decisionmakingprocesses

Somestudiesreportthatmanycouplesdonotgothroughanevaluationofthecommutinglifestylebeforetheyengageinit.[8][9][10]Althoughthedualcareercommutercouplesaregenerallyahighlyeducatedandsophisticatedgroupofpeople,themajorityofthecouplesstudieddidnotuseasystematicdecisionmakingprocess.Thecommutercouplesdidnotcollectinformation,talktoothercommutingcouples,orreviewotheralternativesinmakingtheirdecisiontocommute.Instead,thecouplessimplyacceptedthatcommutingwasnecessaryandthendiscussedwhatthedetailsoftheimpendingseparationwouldentail.Inaddition,twothirdsofthecouplesmadenoplanstoreevaluatetheeffectivenessoftheirdecisiontocommute.[8][9]Despitethesefindings,therearecoupleswhodogothroughadecisionmakingprocess.Theyarereportedtohavehigherrelationshipsatisfactionthanthosewhodidnotgothroughasystematicdecisionmakingprocess.[8]

Practicalimplications

Fortheindividual,thereareafewsuggestionstobemadeinregardstobecomingadualcareercouplebasedonimplicationsofpastresearch.First,thedivisionoflaborshouldbediscussedandmadecleartobothspouses,soiteachindividualsexpectationsareapparent.Thestabilityoftherelationshipshouldalsobeconsidered,aswellasthepossiblereactionseachindividualmighthaveinresponsetosocietalviews.Theexpensesoftravelingandeachspouseshistoryofbeingalone(i.e.,theirattachmentstyles)shouldbeconsideredaswell.[14]Finally,couplesshouldconsiderdiscussingthedecisionwithothercommutercouplestogainfirsthandknowledge.[9]Organization,frequentcommunication,andritualshavebeenfoundtobethreeofthemostimportantaspectsofsuccessfullymaintainingacommutinglifestyle.[29]Weeklyorganizedmeetingscanprovideanopportunityforthecoupletopracticecommunication,improveorganization,takecareofhouseholdresponsibilities,andkeepintouchaboutpastandfutureevents.[30][31]Developingasetofritualsandschedulescanhelpcommutercoupleseasethestressofdepartingandreunitingwitheachother.[32]Ritualssuchasdailyphonecalls,sharingdinnerwhiletalkingonthephone,regulardependablevisitationtimes,apredictableroutineforreunitinganddeparting,specialdinnerdatesfortheirfirstnightstogether,andleavingintimatemessagesandsignsofaffectionhavebeenfoundtobehelpfulformanycommutercouples.[14][16]Theseritualshelpthecoupleestablishasharedhistorythattheycandrawonduringlonelymoments.

Seealso

AttachmentTheorySocialComparisonTheoryWorklifeBalanceLongdistancerelationship

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Row.3. Gilbert,L.A.,&Rachlin,V.(1987).Mentalhealthandpsychologicalfunctioningofdualcareerfamilies.

TheCounselingPsychologist,15(1),749.4. Reed,C.M.,&Bruce,W.M.(1993).Dualcareercouplesinthepublicsector:Asurveyofpersonnel

policiesandpractices.PublicPersonnelManagement.



5. theU.S.BureauofTransportationStatistics,2003.6. Bergen,K.M.,Kirby,E.,&McBride,M.C.(2007)."Howdoyougettwohousescleaned?":Accomplishing

familycaregivingincommutermarriages.JournalofFamilyCommunication,7,287307.7. Rusconi,A.,&Solga,H.Asystematicreflectionupondualcareercouples.Discussion

paper//WissenschaftszentrumBerlinfrSozialforschung(WZB),ForschungsschwerpunktBildung,ArbeitundLebenschancen,AbteilungAusbildungundArbeitsmarkt.

8. Anderson,E.A.(1992).Decisionmakingstyle:Impactonsatisfactionofthecommutercouples'lifestyle.JournalofFamilyandEconomicIssues,13(1),521.

9. Anderson,E.A.,&Spruill,J.W.(1993)."Thedualcareercommuterfamily:Alifestyleonthemove".Marriage&FamilyReview,19(12),131147.

10. Gerstel,N.,&Gross,H.E.(1984).Commutermarriages:Astudyofworkandfamily.NewYork:Guilford.11. vanderKlis,M.,&Mulder,C.H.(2008).Beyondthetrailingspouse:thecommuterpartnershipasan

alternativetofamilymigration.JournalofHousingandtheBuiltEnvironment,23(1),119.12. Jackson,A.P.,Brown,R.P.,&PattersonStewart,K.E.(2000).AfricanAmericansinDualCareer

CommuterMarriages:AnInvestigationofTheirExperiences.TheFamilyJournal,8,2236.13. Groves,M.M.,&HormWingerd,D.M.(1991).Commutermarriages:Personal,familyandcareerissues.

Sociologyandsocialresearch,75(4),212217.14. Magnuson,S.,&Norem,K.(1999).Challengesforhighereducationcouplesincommutermarriages:Insights

forcouplesandcounselorswhoworkwiththem.TheFamilyJournal,7(2),125134.15. Winfield,F.E.(1985).Commutermarriage:Livingtogetherapart.NewYork:ColumbiaUniversityPress.16. Jackson,A.P.,Brown,R.P.,&PattersonStewart,K.E.(2000).AfricanAmericansindualcareercommuter

marriages:Aninvestigationoftheirexperiences.TheFamilyJournal,8(1),2236.17. Biddle,B.J.(1986).Recentdevelopmentinroletheory.Annualreviewofsociology,6792.18. Festinger,L.(1954).Atheoryofsocialcomparisonprocesses.Humanrelations,7(2),117140.19. Gross,H.E.(1980).Dualcareercoupleswholiveapart:Twotypes.JournalofMarriageandtheFamily,

567576.20. Bowlby,J.(1988).Asecurebase.NewYork:Basic.21. Bowlby,J.(1969).AttachmentandLoss:Vol.I:Attachment.NewYork,BasicBooks.22. Bowlby,J.(1973).Attachmentandloss:Vol.II:Separation.NewYork:BasicBooks.23. Mikulincer,M.,&Shaver,P.R.(2007).Attachmentinadulthood:Structure,dynamics,andchange.New

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integrativeoverview.InJ.A.Simpson&W.S.Rholes(Eds.),Attachmenttheoryandcloserelationships(pp.4676).NewYork:Guilford.

26. Pistole,M.C.,Roberts,A.&Chapman,M.L.(2010).Attachment,relationshipmaintenance,andstressinlongdistanceandgeographicallycloseromanticrelationships.JournalofSocialandPersonalRelationships,27(4),535552.

27. Levy,K.N.,Blatt,S.J.,&Shaver,P.R.(1998).Attachmentstylesandparentalrepresentations.JournalofPersonalityandSocialPsychology,74(2),407.

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29. Rotter,J.C.,Barnett,D.E.,&Fawcett,M.L.(1998).Ontheroadagain:Dualcareercommuterrelationships.TheFamilyJournal,6(1),4648.

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