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FREE Independent News | February 7 | Volume 14 | Number 6 | inweekly.net “We'd love to be forced to eat another cake in the name of 'research.'” 14 “I like to add a touch of class and artistic elegance through joyous kinetic movement.” 21 12 “This is just Star Wars stuff.”

Feb. 7, 2013 issue

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Page 1: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

FREE ▶Independent News | February 7 | Volume 14 | Number 6 | inweekly.net

“We'd love to be forced to eat another cake in the name of 'research.'”

14

“I like to add a touch of class and artistic elegance through joyous kinetic movement.”

2112

“This is just Star Wars stuff.”

Page 2: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

2 inweekly.net2

publisher & editor Rick Outzen

production manager Joani Delezen

art director Samantha Crooke

administration/ staff writerJennie McKeon

staff writerJeremy Morrison

contributing writers Bradley “B.J.” Davis, Jr., Joani Delezen, Hana Frenette, James Hagen, Brett Hutchins, Chelsa Jillard, Sarah McCartan, Kate Peterson, Chuck Shepherd, T.S. Strickland

contact us438.8115

Page 3: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 3

winners loserswinners & losers

CHARLES BARE The freshman Pensacola City Councilman won his fi rst political skir-mish with Mayor Hayward and City Admin-istrator Bill Reynolds when he pointed out that the pair had called an unlawful meeting to discuss mayor's RESTORE nominee. Bare could be the one thing that Hayward has feared the most—a councilman who knows Robert’s Rules of Order.

ESCAMBIA COUNTY AREA TRANSIT ECAT has reported 1,530,053 total rides for 2012—an 11-percent increase from the previous year. National ridership increases for fixed-route systems only reflect a 1.8 percent increase, according to America Public Transportation Association.

FAMILIESFIRST NETWORK Florida Department of Children and Families Secretary David Wilkins recently pre-sented the agency at Lakeview the Most Improved Performance Standards Award. FamiliesFirst Network contracts with DCF to provide prevention, diversion, foster care, adoption and other family services in Escambia, Santa Rosa, Okaloosa and Walton counties.

BETHEL YOUTH DEVELOPMENT At Pensacola’s MLK Parade, this group passed out over 5,000 new books and 10,000 bookmarks free to children and youth. The service project, called the MLK Parade of Books Project, is done in partnership with Bethel AME Church, Robert Robino Productions and area businesses.

ASHTON HAYWARD Most city hall ob-servers felt that Gulf Power executive Ben-tina Terry was the perfect pick to represent the city on the RESTORE advisory—Uni-versity of Michigan Law School graduate, Pensacola resident, African-American, female and someone outside of Hayward’s usual picks. Instead the mayor chose his campaign treasurer, Dave Penzone—a fine man, but someone he had already used for his pension advisory. What made matters worse was Hayward never explained or defended Penzone’s nomination. Result: Penzone vote 3-5; three days later, Terry vote 9-0.

JIM MESSER In the middle of the Penzone debacle, the city attorney bailed on the Pensacola City Council. In an email sent to Mayor Hayward, City Administrator Bill Reynolds and the Pensacola City Council, he excused himself from giving any opin-ions on council rules and policies. Messer had been criticized by council members for not using the latest version of the council rules at the ill-fated super special, but probably unlawful, committee of the whole meeting on Jan. 25.

CHARLIE CRIST The early favorite to be the Democrats' choice to run against Gov. Rick Scott is about to find out how hard it will be to defeat an incumbent, even one as unpopular as Scott. The governor’s proposed 2013-14 budget is chocked full of goodies guaranteed to win votes. The 2014 election will be no cake walk.

winners losersCharles Bare

Ashton Hayward

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Page 4: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

4 inweekly.net4

FINDING INSPIRATION IN THE BIG EASYOn the Saturday night before the Super Bowl, I attended a fundraiser for Steve Gleason and his foundation, Team Glea-son. Steve is one of those underdogs that New Orleans loves.

On September 25, 2006, the special teams player for the Saints blocked a punt, which was recovered for a touchdown. The score was the first for the Saints in Superdome since Hurricane Katrina had devastated the city. Later that season, Steve won the “Special Teams Player of the Year” award for the Saints.

Steve retired from the NFL in 2008 and enrolled in the MBA program at Tulane Uni-versity. In January 2011, he was diagnosed with Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS).

The progressive neurodegenerative disease, often referred to as "Lou Gehrig's Disease," affects nerve cells in the brain and the spinal cord and eventually leads to the death as the control of muscle move-ment deteriorates. The victims literally become trapped in their minds as they lose the ability to speak or move, while their minds stay strong.

When I met Steve on Saturday, he was in a motorized wheelchair. His eyes formed sentences on the computer attached to his wheelchair that vocalized his thoughts. He made it clear that he had no plans to fade away without putting up a fight.

He and his family and friends have banded to together to form Team Gleason to

raise public awareness of ALS, create a global conversation about the disease to ultimately fi nd an end to the disease and to o� er to others su� ering with ALS the leading edge technology, equipment and services.

The Big Game Big Give party was hosted by J.P. Morgan, Forbes, Lamborghini and Michael Bay, the director of the “Trans-formers” film series. Chef Donald Link, owner of the Cochon restaurant, donated the food. Jordin

Sparks was the entertainment.The proceeds went to funding Team

Gleason House for Innovative Living, which will be based in the Big Easy to develop new technologies for patients suffering from ALS. Steve had set a goal of raising $5 million for the house by the end of the Super Bowl.

Saints Quarterback Dree Brees do-nated $250,000 to the facility. JP Morgan Chase and Co. gave a $350,000 grant. Bay auctioned off at the party a walk-on part in his next movie. J.P. Morgan put up four courtside tickets to the U.S. Open. However, the top auction item was a trip to Peru to climb Machu Picchu in April with Steve and former teammate Scott Fujita—a clear indication that Steve hasn’t stopped fighting.

In a cynical world, there still are inspi-rational heroes.

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Page 5: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 5

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Page 6: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

6 inweekly.net6

Gov. Rick Scott unveiled on Jan. 31 his budget proposal for fi scal year 2013-2014, which he titled the “Florida Families First Budget.” The $74.2 billion budget is the larg-est in state history and $8.4 billion more than the fi rst one he proposed in 2011.

It expands healthcare and services to the disabled, gives raises to teachers and state employees, cuts taxes on manufac-turers and restores some of the governor’s previous cuts to funds for higher education. The environment and transportation also have funding increases.

“My message is simple,” said Gov. Scott when he announced his budget. “Everything we do in government must be focused on helping families pursue their dreams by getting a great job and accessing a quality education.”

It’s as if the Grinch’s heart grew overnight.

EDUCATIONThe “Florida Families First” budget

provides a record $10.7 billion in state fund-ing for the state’s K-12 public schools and includes $2,500 pay raises for classroom teachers. The total funding for K-12 pub-lic education is $18.7 billion, a 7.3-percent increase over the current fi scal year. The funding per student is $6,799, an increase of $412, or 6.45 percent.

The budget provides $1.1 billion in fund-ing for state colleges and $3.85 billion for Florida’s universities. Pensacola State College and other state colleges will benefi t from an increase of $74.4 million over current year funding for the state college system,

which includes $13 million for competitive workforce programs. The University of West Florida and other state universities will see an overall increase of $393.3 million.

The budget includes performance fund-ing for workforce development with metrics for fund distribution. In addition to the state colleges’ $14 million for workforce develop-ment, Gov. Scott has earmarked $167 million for Florida’s public universities and $18.7 for district workforce programs, which includes Workforce Escarosa.

The governor wants the performance measures to be:

• Percentage of graduates employed or continuing education;• Average wage of employed graduates; and• Average cost to produce a graduate.

SENIORSThe governor

recommends an additional $24.2 million to serve individuals who are at-risk for nursing home placement and are currently on the waitlist for home and community-based services. The Department’s Nurs-ing Home Diversion Program, which cur-rently serves 22,000 seniors, will receive an additional $5.6 million to reduce its waitlist and better serve seniors who are in the most critical need of care.

Governor Scott is also proposing a 17.4-percent increase, $18.6 million, to serve almost 1,700 more individuals through the Aged and Disabled Adult Waiver (ADA), cutting the waitlist for that program by more than half.

ENVIRONMENTThe total proposed budget for the

environmental policy area is $3 billion, which is approximately $225 million less than last year’s budget, primarily due to a reduction of debt service associated with the retirement of land acquisition bonds.

Everglades Restoration is slated to receive $60 million, a $30-million increase over last year’s appropriation. Florida Forever gets an increase of more than $66 million. The funds will be used primarily to acquire lands needed for springs protection, military bu� ering or water resource protection. The budget includes $25 million for beach resto-ration projects.

ECONOMIC OPPORTUNITYThe economic development budget is

$1.2 billion. The Division of Strategic Busi-ness Development gets a $200-million increase to continue its activities to attract businesses to Florida. Workforce develop-ment has a $55-mil-lion increase.

Gov. Scott has proposed $250,000 to complete and implement an eco-nomic development incentives database and portal to view incentives for various economic develop-ment projects and

track the return on the state’s investment on those projects.

The budget also raises the level of income exempt from the Florida corporate income tax from $50,000 to $75,000. He estimates that will free about 2,000 current corporate taxpayers from having to pay the tax. The rev-enue loss to the state is $19.7 million annually.

Scott reveals ‘Florida Families First’ Budgetby Rick Outzen

THE GRINCH FINDS HIS HEART

“Everything we do in gov-ernment must be focused on helping families pursue their dreams by getting a great job and accessing a quality education.”Gov. Rick Scott

THE GRINCH FINDS HIS HEART

Rick Scott Highlights $2,500 Teacher Pay Raise at Twin Lakes Elementary School in Tampa, Fl / courtesy photo

FLORIDA FAMILIES FIRSTKEY POINTS▶PUBLIC SCHOOLS

• $2,500 pay raise for classroom teachers• $14 million increase for Teacher Classroom Supply Assistance Program• $74.9 million for school safety• $100 million for digital learning• $100 million for new charter school capital outlay needs

▶HIGHER EDUCATION• No increase in college or university tuition• $181 million for performance-based

funding for colleges and universities

▶TAXES• Sales tax exemption for manufactur-ers' equipment purchases• Raise the threshold for corporate tax exemption from $50,000 to $75,000

▶JOBS• Elimination of 3,647 state jobs (3.1 percent)• Performance-based bonuses for state workers• $8.3 billion for Transportation Work Program that retains or creates 500,000 jobs in road construction industry

▶ENVIRONMENT• $60 million for Everglades restora-tion• $75 million for Florida Forever land preservation program• $6.5 million for restoring springs, though water agencies had requested $122 million

▶WHAT HAPPENS NEXT ON STATE BUDGET?

Following presentation of the governor’s recommended budget, the Legislature begins its review during committee meetings prior to the start of the legislative session.

During the legislative session, the Florida House and Senate each pass a budget

refl ecting the priorities of its members. Di� erences between the Senate and House budgets are resolved in a joint conference committee.

The conference committee report be-comes the General Appropriations Act and is presented to the governor. The governor has line-item veto authority to delete any specifi c budget item.

Once the governor has completed his line item vetoes, he signs the General Ap-propriations Act into law, establishing the statewide budget for the next fi scal year.

A two-thirds majority vote of both the Senate and House is required to overturn any of the governor’s line item vetoes.

Page 7: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 7

It was obvious what the theme of the meeting was: neighborhoods.

“What do you like best about your neighborhood?” asked Pensacola City Councilwoman Jewel Cannada-Wynn.

The Jan. 31 community forum was the fi rst in a series of what the councilwoman has dubbed “Fifth Thursday” meetings. She intends to host such forums on each of this year’s four fi fth-Thursdays.

“It was my first introduction to Dis-trict 7,” the newly elected councilwoman later explained.

Cannada-Wynn’s opened the town hall by providing attendees with her cell phone number.

“You can also call me,” she said, stress-ing that she would be making herself avail-able to the community. “If you have a little neighborhood meeting, I will come.”

Some attendees wanted to know the status of abandoned pieces of public property. Others were concerned about recent crime.

A couple of people talked to the coun-cilwoman about the recent decision to relocate the Westside Branch Library to a planned community center at Legion Field. Some residents have voiced concern that the city didn’t do enough to inform nearby

residents during the process that led up to the move.

“Ok, well, you have the Jewel of Pensacola here now,” Cannada-Wynn assured them.

As the councilwoman fi elded questions from those in attendance, a collection of poster boards were lined up behind her. Each espoused the qualities of a tight-knit neighborhood. One, propped on an easel, featured a quote from Frederick Douglass.

“Our community belongs to us,” it read, “and whether it is mean or majestic, whether arrayed in glory or covered in shame, we cannot but share in its charac-ter and destiny.”

Cannada-Wynn tended to direct resi-dents’ concerns back to this central theme. In short, she explained, it’s more di� cult for a viable, thriving neighborhood—or network of neighborhoods—to slip into the void.

When asked about crime, the council-woman said she had a meeting with the chief of police the following day. Then she talked about neighborhoods.

“It takes more than just police pres-ence,” she explained the next day after the meeting. “It has to be the vigilance of the neighborhood as well.” {in}

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The governor wants to exempt manu-facturers from paying sales taxes on their equipment purchases. Florida is one of the few states that taxes those purchases, which puts the state at a competitive disadvantage. He plans to cover the recurring $115.3 million in lost revenue through cost savings across state government.

TRANSPORTATIONHighway construction is a big winner in

the recommended budget. The Department of Transportation budget is $9.1 billion, of which $8.3 billion supports the Transporta-tion Work Program. This is $917 million more that is being spent in the current budget.

The governor believes this will retain or cre-ate an estimated 500,000 jobs, a third of which will be in highway construction. State highway construction gets $3.6 billion, bridge construc-tion has a $287 million budget, and county transportation programs get $144 million.

On the day of Scott’s budget release, Florida Senate President Don Gaetz (R-Niceville) held a series of press conferences along Northwest Florida to announce the state was accelerating nearly $1 billion in transportation funding.

The 10 projects, according to Gaetz, constitute the largest single investment in this area’s transportation infrastructure in

state history and includes improvements for the region’s ports, roadways, bridges and rail transportation.

The largest single project is the replace-ment of the Pensacola Bay Bridge that connects Gulf Breeze and Pensacola. The bridge will not be a toll and will be built entirely by state transportation funds. Con-struction is scheduled to begin in two years following acquisition of right of way and environmental permits.

CONTINUE PROGRESSFor Gov. Scott, his “Florida Families First”

budget refl ects his progress in reducing the size and cost of state government and in creating an environment that encourages job creation.

“Over the last two years, we made the tough choices to get our economy back on track,” Scott said. “Through cost-savings ef-forts, we were able to cut taxes and eliminate regulations on businesses to help them suc-ceed and create more jobs.”

He believes this budget will build on his accomplishments.

 “As long as even one Florida family is still struggling to fi nd work or access a great educa-tion, our work is not done. This year, we will build on our successes through targeted invest-ments that put Florida Families First.” {in}

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Page 9: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 9

THE BIG FIX

ECUA’s Long Road to Redemptionby Jeremy MorrisonIt’s completely utilitarian. Cold metal plates and screws and lifeless. But for just a moment, its head tilted slightly, the thing seems alive. It begs for attention as a winter sun fl ashes across glass eyes.

“It looks robotic,” said Jim Roberts, a public information o� cer with Emerald Coast Utilities Authority. “RD-D2, or what-ever it was.”

It doesn’t move very fast. Not with these small wheels.

“About walking speed,” said Doug Gib-son, a crew supervisor with ECUA. “If you put the big tires on there it’ll really go.”

It’s a couple of feet long. Equipped with a light and a camera. Its functionality bleeds a personality.

On a crisp early morning o� of Langley Avenue, the ECUA crew prepared to lower their small robotic pet into an open manhole. Once inside the sewer line, it will search out problems in the pipe.

“Any faults with the pipe,” Gibson ex-plained. “Root intrusion, utilities, debris, just any kind of thing.”

On this particular morning, the robot is locating a hole in the line caused by an at-tempt to run another utility. Just another morning for the ECUA robot. It seems to enjoy the work.

Gibson sends out crews everyday, all day, to scour ECUA’s network of infrastructure for possible issues. It takes about three and a half years to inspect the entire system—then they start over.

That’s been going on for a while. Well before last year’s agreement with the Florida Department of Environmental Protection.

“We started a good four or fi ve years ago hitting it hard,” Gibson said. “Before the consent order.”

THE NOTHING-NEW BLUESLast June, the DEP issued a consent

order to ECUA. The state wanted the utilities authority to address issues with its infrastructure.

The consent order wasn’t exactly enlightening. It ad-dressed some of the concerns already giving ECUA o� cials headaches.

“It’s nothing new to us,” said ECUA Director Steve Sorrell. “We support it, we’re

part of it.”It’s no secret that portions of ECUA’s

aging infrastructure are in need of repairs or replacement. Addressing the issue has been a daily a� air.

“Every single day that goes by, we’re try-ing to upgrade things,” Sorrell said.

The DEP consent order—which specifi-cally addresses sewage spills—formalizes the need to address the infrastructure. It, in fact, mandates it.

“They’re very interested in resolving these issues,” said Shawn Hamilton, DEP Northwest District director. “Like Steve said, they were heading in this direction.”

Hamilton describes the consent order as the “product of a negotiated process.” An amiable arrangement.

“It says ‘order,’” he explained, “but at the heart of it is an agreement.”

At the heart of that agreement is a calendar, a 16-year window in which ECUA must address issues with its infrastructure.

“We wanted to make sure we weren’t setting them up for failure,” Hamilton said. “Of course, we’d love everything to be done in the blink of an eye, but that’s not realistic.”

During the 16-year interim, the area’s water and wastewater infrastructure will continue to exhibit issues. In addition to everyday problems such as stray utility intrusions, the pipes will continue to deal with age-associated ailments—breaks and cracks, inflows and infiltration and spills.

feature story

The ECUA uses a camera-equipped robot to scour the infrastructure. Larger wheels can be attached to reach higher speeds in wider pipes. / photo by Jeremy Morrison

“Every single day that goes by, we’re trying to upgrade things.” Steve Sorrell

Page 10: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

10 inweekly.net10

The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency initially pushed for a tighter window. It wanted ECUA’s infrastructure addressed much more quickly.

“The EPA actually wanted a five-year period—it’s just too big of an animal, it’s too costly,” Sorrell said, adding that the work-load itself would also prove prohibitive. “We couldn’t do it in five years if we wanted to.”

The DEP suggested seven years, but the utilities authority o�cials still consid-ered that calendar ambitious. They preferred to spread the financial pain over a longer period of time.

“Then we talked about 10 years and we said, ‘Well, that’s going to put a real hardship on the people that live here,’” Sorrell said. “What we did was stretch it out over a 16-year-period.”

Prior to the consent order, the ECUA had already begun a series of incremental rate increases in order to fund needed repairs. Such increas-es will most likely continue for the foreseeable future.

“They’re not going to be dramatic,” Sorrell said. “I don’t think they’re going to be 20 or 30 percent or anything like that.”

The ECUA was already knee-deep in upkeep, but the director said the DEP

consent order will focus such e�orts. It will make them “much more organized.”

Improving the infrastructure is depen-dent on sufficient funds. Sorrell said the consent order will also serve to ensure that those funds—in the form of incremental rate increases approved by an elected board—are found.

“DEP has the regulatory hammer, and they wanted the guarantee that something was going to be done regardless of who was in o�ce,” the director said. “A federal judge will enforce this.”

Sorrell described the ECUA’s relation-ship with regulatory agencies as “very cooperative.” He contrasted it with the scene in Miami.

“EPA has come down on them with a strong fist,” the director said. “They didn’t have to do that to us, because we’re agree-able and supportive.”

PIPES AND PROBLEMS The ECUA water and wastewater infra-

structure constitutes thousands of miles of pipes lying just beneath the ground. They channel potable water to customers and ferry sewage away to a treatment facility.

“You’re talking a lot of pipe,” Gibson said, as the robot scoured the drain buried beneath the street under his feet.

Some of the infrastructure—particularly portions inherited in the early 1980s from the city of Pensacola—is quite old.

“Some of the pipes were installed, could be a hundred years ago,” Sorrell said.

While the director said most of the water infrastructure is in “good shape,” there are concerns with the wastewater pipes.

An ECUA crew prepares to send a camera into a sewer main off of Langley Avenue. / photo by Jeremy Morrison

“Of course, we’d love everything to be done in the blink of an eye, but that’s not realistic.”Shawn Hamilton

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Page 11: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 11

With the older sections composed of pipes made with cement or clay—“it’s called terra cotta”—breaks happen.

“It’s very, very fragile,” Sorrell said.While pipes can break for any number of

reasons—roots, utility intrusions, construc-tion accidents—aging infrastructure carries an inherent risk. This is not a problem unique to ECUA.

In 2002, the Congressional Budget O�ce estimated that annual investment aimed at improving water infrastructure through the year 2019 needed to be between $13 and $20.9 billion. That same year, the EPA released a gap analysis, which compared the current spending for wastewater infrastruc-ture to the actual funding needs—the agency estimated that over the next two decades the U.S. would need to pony up $390 billion to improve its systems.

The American Society of Civil Engineers gave the nation’s water systems a D- in its 2009 Report Card on American Infrastructure.

“Many systems have reached the end of their useful design lives,” an ASCE sum-mary stated.

When breaks occur in a pipe, it opens the door to problems. Dirt and debris can enter the line. In water lines this means contaminates can enter the supply and leads to o�cials issuing boil-water notices. In the case of wastewater pipes, sewage can exit the line or the line can be overwhelmed and result in a spill.

“You’ve heard talk of I and I—inflow and infiltration?” asked Sorrell. “I and I is what causes SSOs.”

SSOs are the subject of the DEP consent order. It’s an acronym for Sanitary Sewer Overflow. That’s a fancy way to describe a big shitty mess—it means untreated sewage

is entering the environment.The consent order focuses on 24 out of

more than 100 SSOs, or spills, that occurred from March 2009 to May 2010. The agency

focused on spills it deemed to be “within the reasonable control” of ECUA, the largest of which released 125,000 gallons.

In 2012, ECUA reported around 70 spills to DEP. It was about the same for 2011, including a line-break that resulted in the release of more than 2 million gallons of un-treated sewage into Thompson Bayou.

According to Emerald Coastkeeper Sava Varazo, the risks posed by an aging infrastructure shouldn’t be underplayed. He’s concerned about vulnerabilities in the system and the impacts of spills.

DESIGN LIFE OF WATER SYSTEMSCollections: 80 to 100 yearsTreatment Plants, Concrete Structures : 50 yearsTreatment Plants, Mechanical and Electrical: 15 to 25 yearsForce Mains: 25 yearsPumping Stations, Concrete Struc-tures: 50 yearsPumping Stations, Mechanical and Electrical: 15 yearsInterceptors: 90 to 100 years

source: Clean Water and Drinking Water Infrastructure Gap Analysis Report, EPA, Sept. 2002.

“If you don’t do anything and you just wait, the road will collapse.” Doug Gibson

A video feed from beneath the street reveals a hole in a pipe; if left unattended this presents inflow and infiltration issues, the possibility for a spill or a collapsed street. / photo by Jeremy Morrison

gulfpower.com

They won the 2012 EEI Emergency Assistance Award.And the hearts of people everywhere.

Over the past several months, Gulf Power crews have gone above and beyond the call of duty to restore power in times of crisis. It’s a core value that’s become a part of us — keeping the customer at the center of everything we do.

In recognition of their dedication, our crews have earned the Edison Electric Institute Emergency Assistance Award for working to restore power in eight states following Hurricane Sandy, Isaac and other severe storms. They did this selfl essly, leaving behind their families — and their co-workers, who kept the lights on at home.

On behalf of the Gulf Power family, thank you to our crews for being good neighbors and for helping those in need.

GPC-1108-83217.indd 1 1/29/13 11:40 AM

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12 inweekly.net12

“Your first concern is ground water,” Varazo said, pointing out the obvious pollu-tion issues. “Your second is surface water.”

While he’s familiar with the ECUA’s financial argument, the Coastkeeper doesn’t think the 16-year timeline agreed to by DEP is optimal for the environment.

“The consent order is better than no consent order, but it’s a long time to wait,” Varazo said. “Sixteen years is just so far out of sight, out of mind.”

A BIG JOBRegardless of the age or shape of a

system’s infrastructure, inflow and infiltra-tion will be a concern. Sewage spills will still happen.

Gas and cable companies will still stumble across lines. Contractors will still dig into them.

When asked the biggest cause of SSOs, Gibson doesn’t hesitate. It’s not due to aging infrastructure-induced breaks.

“Grease,” Gibson said. A good number of SSOs are apparently

caused when restaurants improperly dispose of grease. Once in the line, it hardens and the fun begins.

“You have to go out there with a root cut-ter and get it out,” Gibson said.

Gibson’s got a good bit of experience with water and wastewater infrastructure. Got 32 years in the field.

Things have changed a lot during that time. While the infrastructure ages, the world around it evolves. The tools become techier and the robots get cooler.

“Equipment’s changed,” Gibson said. “Better technology.”

Inside the ECUA truck, workers moni-tor a video feed from their pet robot under the street. This is the prep work for utilitar-ian surgery.

“This is great,” Roberts said, studying the video. “This is just Star Wars stu�.”

The robot located a small round hole in the pipe. Raw earth peeked into the system. If left unattended, this could potentially lead to SOS issues or possibly allow enough dirt into the pipe to eventually crater the street.

“If you don’t do anything and you just wait, the road will collapse,” Gibson said.

Another crew will tend to the problem. They will either replace the pipe or patch it up. Gibson and his crew will be nailing down other problems by then.

With a complete loop of the system made every few years, ECUA has a relatively intimate account of the condition of its in-frastructure. As per the DEP consent order, it will now begin to map out the specific issues.

Last fall, the utilities authority supplied the state with a Comprehensive Evaluation

Plan. In it, ECUA explains how it plans to de-termine the priority issues with its infrastruc-ture. The evaluation process is scheduled to take five years.

The next five years will be devoted to correcting priority issues. Work will focus on projects deemed most e�ective in elimi-nating SSOs. The five years after that will be devoted to the completion of all other rehabilitative projects identified during the assessment. The final year built into the 16-year plan accommodates DEP’s review and ECUA’s response.

While the consent-order calendar makes everything very o�cial, it has not impacted reality on the ground. ECUA crews continue to tend to the infrastructure, correcting problems as they find them.

“It’s a big job,” Sorrell said.As Gibson explained how the pace of his

work has quickened along with technologi-cal advances, a man on his crew scanned the street with a device that looked like a cross between a metal detector and a futuristic pogo-stick. He located the robot’s head, and then crunched some math to deduce the whereabouts of the hole.

“If we got 1,200 feet a day back in the day, you were doing good,” Gibson laughed.

The supervisor estimated that his crews currently cover three to four thousand feet of pipe each day. Eternally searching for problems.

Perhaps in a few years, the prioritization list and increase in rates will allow ECUA to increase the pace even more. For now, it’s one day at a time, for 16 years. {in}

INVITATION TO CONSENTIn June 2012, the Florida Depart-ment of Environmental Protec-tion issued a consent order to the Emerald Coast Utilities Authority. The agreement cites 24 spill events between March 2009 and May 2010 that the state deemed to be avoidable.

Sanitary Sewer Overflows (SSO), or spills, occur when there is a break in the pipe, or the system is over-whelmed by heavy rain events. While spills can be caused by accidental breaks in the pipe, an aging infrastruc-ture—with its inherent inflow and infiltration issues—makes a system all the more susceptible to SOS events.

ECUA is currently in the begin-ning months of the 16-year calendar hammered out with DEP. The first five years will be devoted to evaluating the infrastructure, with all issues set to be addressed by June 2028.

Since the time frame addressed in the consent order, ECUA has re-ported a couple of hundred spills to DEP. They are due to everything from grease to line-breaks, and range from a few gallons to a June 2011 spill—due to a break—that released millions of gal-lons of sewage in Thompson Bayou.

“Sixteen years is just so far out of sight, out of mind.”Sava Varazo

F ISH HOUSE: (850) 470-0003, OPEN DAILY AT 11 A.M. · ATLAS OYSTER HOUSE: (850) 437-1961, OPEN MON.–SAT. 5 P.M., SUN. 11 A.M. · 600 S. BARRACKS ST. · CREDIT CARDS OK · WWW.GOODGRITS.COM

Valentine’s Day, February 14LUNCH 11 A.M. TO 3 P.M. • DINNER AT 5 P.M.

Chef Billy Ballou has prepared both a lunch feature as well as two dinner features for the occasion. In addition to the features, we will also be serving from our full lunch and dinner menus. For details, visit www.goodgrits.com.

Page 13: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 13 WEEK OF FEBRUARY 7 - 14

If you can’t make it to New Orleans for Mardi Gras, don’t worry. You don’t neces-sarily have to venture to the French Quarter to get some beads and moon pies. Local Krewes throw a pretty good party, too. Whether you’re looking to catch a parade, enjoy creole cuisine or just enter a race, there’s plenty of ways to laissez les bons temps rouler!

2.7 PIRATES 4 PROSTATES CHARITY GOLF TOURNAMENT The Krewe of Lafi tte will host a charity golf tournament at Scenic Hills Country Club, located at 8891 Burning Tree Road, begin-ning at 9:30 a.m. Registration is $75 per person or $300 per team and begins at 8 a.m. The event will feature on-course prizes, games and food and beverages during play. Proceeds will benefi t Pints for Prostates and Us Too Prostate Cancer Education and Support. Contact Ted Gri� n at 723-7534 for more information.

2.8 MILTON MARDI GRAS PARADE The annual Milton Mardi Gras Parade begins at Milton High School, located at 5445 Stewart St. at 6 p.m.

2.8 KREWE OF LAFITTE ILLUMINATED MARDI GRAS PARADE Don’t miss the

beautiful, illuminated nighttime spectacle. The parade of pirates, march-ing bands, local celebri-ties, dance groups and many local krewes, begins at 8 p.m. and will travel down the historic streets of downtown Pensacola. For more information, visit kreweofl afi tte.net.

2.9 MARDI GRAS FARM-ER’S MARKET Due to the Mardi Gras Grand Parade, there will be no Palafox Market on Saturday, Feb-ruary 9. However, if you head over to 401 N. Reus St., you can check out the Mardi Gras Farmer’s Market from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. The market is brought to you by Truth for Youth. For more information, email [email protected].

2.9 2013 PENSACOLA GRAND MARDI GRAS

PARADE The Mardi Gras main-event will begin at 2 p.m., rain or shine. The parade will start at the corner of Spring and Garden and will wind down to Palafox and Wright then back to the end at Palafox and Main. Stuck inside? Tune into Blab TV for the live parade broadcast or watch online at blabtv.com/on-demand. For more information, visit pensacolamardigras.com.

2.9 MARDI GRAS FESTIVAL AT PERDIDO KEY Visit Hub Stacey’s at the Point in Perdido Key, located at 5851 Galvez Road, for the boat parade and a whole day of Mardi Gras events including a Cajun cook-o¤ , live music and fi reworks at 8 p.m. The parade is a family-ori-ented event and will last from 12 to 8 p.m. For more information, visit myperdidokey.com.

2.9 3RD ANNUAL PARDI GRAS The 3rd An-nual Pardi Gras will be held at the American Legion Post 33, 1401 West Intendencia St. The event will feature live music, D.J.s, art, danc-ers, vendors and a cash bar. The party starts at 9 p.m. For more information, visit 3rdannual-pardigras.eventbrite.com.

2.9 KREWE OF WRECKS STREET DANCE Catch the Krewe of Wrecks Street Dance at the

Sandbar, located at 715 Pensacola Beach Blvd. For more information, visit kreweofwrecks.com.

2.10 MARDI GRAS MAYHEM Starting at 9 a.m., join Krewe du Go at the Hilton Pensacola Beach Gulf Front, 12 Via De Luna, for a pre-party for the Krewe of Wrecks Mardi Gras Parade benefi tting Manna Food Pantries. Bring three non-perishable food items and receive one drink free. Krewes are challenged to fi ll parking spaces in the Hilton garage with non-perishable foods. There will be plenty of food, with $9 crawfi sh fl ats, $5 red beans and rice, $5 burgers, $3 hot dogs and of course drinks—$4 well drinks and $3 craft beer. Enjoy music courtesy of Ramsey Coates of AnyDayDJ. Head back to the Hilton for the parade after-party too. For more information, call 435-8699 or visit gopensacola.com.

2.10 PRE-PARADE PARTIES ON THE BEACH If you don’t want to wait until 2 p.m. to begin your partying head to The Break Beach Bar, 65 Via de Luna, and The Islander Lounge, 43 Via de Luna, for some pre-gaming

beginning at 10 a.m. For more infor-mation, visit, facebook.com/Break-

BeachBar or sandshaker.com.

2.10 LAISSEZ LES BONS TEMPS ROULER WITH CHEF LEON GALATOIRE OF GALA-TORIE’S Chef Leon Galatoire, a fourth-generation member of the founding family of New Orleans’ historic restaurant, Galatorie’s will be bringing NOLA-style cuisine to at Jackson’s. Brunch begins at 11 a.m. and dinner begins at 5 p.m., both events will feature a meet and greet with the chef and a compli-mentary glass of champagne, New Orleans-style jazz music by the Palafox Trio—not to mention delicious food.

by Jennie McKeon

art , f ilm, music , stage, books and other signs of civil ization. . .

Arts & EntertainmentMardi Gras in Pensacola

fi ll parking spaces in the Hilton garage beginning at 10 a.m. For more infor-

mation, visit, facebook.com/Break-

Whether you’re looking to catch a parade, enjoy creole cuisine or just enter a race, there’s plenty of ways to laissez les bons temps rouler!

DOLCE! CELEBRATES MARDI GRAS

Make your way to Dolce, where you can try Hurricane Sorbet or King Cake Ge-lato –hey, it’s Mardi Gras, try both! Owner Marie Mayeur, a transplant from New Orleans, couldn’t forget Louisiana’s biggest holiday.

DOLCE!WHERE: 221 E. Zaragoza St.HOURS: 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Tuesday-Thursday11 a.m. to 10 p.m. Friday to Saturday12 to 5 p.m. SundayDETAILS: 469-9600 or facebook.com/Dol-cePensacola

Dolce! King Cake Gelato / photo by Samantha Crooke

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14 inweekly.net14

Brunch is $45 per person and dinner is $75. Reservations are required. To reserve your table, call 469-9898. For more information, visit jacksons.goodgrits.com.

2.10 KREWE OF WRECKS PENSACOLA BEACH MARDI GRAS PARADE Need more beads? Head to Pensacola Beach for the afternoon parade, beginning at 2 p.m. on Via de Luna. For more information, visit kreweofwrecks.com.

2.11 RED BEANS AND RICE LUNCH Enjoy a krewe-worthy meal of red beans and rice on Casino Beach at 11 a.m. For more information, visit kreweofwrecks.com.

2.12 FAT TUESDAY AT GREAT SOUTH-ERN RESTAURANT GROUP In addition to the Fish House, Atlas and Jackson’s regular menus, all restaurants will be o� ering New Orleans inspired dishes. At the Fish House, enjoy a dish of Cajun etou� ee topped with crawfi sh. At Atlas, The Mardi Gras Roll, an oshi-style sushi with green and purple rice, smoked salmon, two di� erent kinds of tobiko, and topped with a cucumber Mardi Gras crown will be available is part of the Tuesday half-o� promotion. Lastly, at Jackson’s Chef Irv Miller has created an additional New Orleans-inspired Mardi Gras three-course fi xed-price menu for $35 for the evening. To start, a tasso-spiced crab cake and rémoulade. The entrée feature is Creole jambalaya with slow-cooked chicken and gumbo greens and to fi nish, Calas (rice beignets) with praline sauce and vanilla ice cream. To reserve your table, please call the restaurant 469-9898. For more information on all restaurants, visit goodgrits.com.

2.12 SHOEBOX FLOAT CONTEST Watch area krewes compete in the shoebox fl oat contest at the Sandshaker, located at 731 Pensacola Beach Blvd.

2.12 2013 FAT TUESDAY PRISCUS STREET PARTY CELEBRATION Starting at 7 p.m., South Palafox to Government Street and from Government Street to Tarragona Street, will be closed o� for Fat Tuesday festivities. Watch the new King and Queen Priscus receive their crowns. The party continues until 12 a.m.

2.16 SPECIAL OLYMPICS 2ND ANNUAL MARDI GRAS FUN RUN AND WALK The Special Olympics of Escambia and Santa Rosa County will be holding their 2nd annual Mardi Gras Fun Run and Walk will begin at 12 p.m. at Osceola Golf Course, located at 300 Tonawa-nda Drive. Immediately following will be a Finish Line Party. You can register individually or as a team—great for krewes. All proceeds benefi t local Special Olympic athletes. For more information, call Jessica Barrale, county coordinator to Special Olympics Escambia/Santa Rosa at 291-6234 or [email protected]. {in}

You don't have to be super into Mardi Gras to be into king cake. It's honestly one of the easiest—and tastiest—ways to enjoy Carnival season. No crowds, no beads, no potential DUI's from over indulg-ing—just sweet, sugary goodness.

The only thing you have to worry about with king cake is getting a good one. And maybe a little sugar induced weight gain or a future diagnosis of Type 2 Diabetes—but that's exactly why Mardi Gras is followed by Lent. So you can have your cake and repent later.

The IN staff decided to indulge and just focus on the first king cake worry—getting our hands on the best one in town. We ordered a variety of sizes and

filling flavors from around town and judged them by a set of proven and es-tablished criteria.

We based our grading scale on one used by two New Orleans residents and king cake experts, Deborah Centola and Laura Jones. They have an annual tradition of ranking king cakes in the Crescent City—where king cakes are a way of life in a lot of ways. It's hard to imagine a more rigorous or balanced test: appearance, texture, top-pings, sweetness (because as anybody who has ever had a bad king cake can attest, they can become super sweet, super fast), overall flavor, filling choices, and whether or not the baby is baked in or not (a must if you're following king cake tradition).

So read up and get ready to get your own king cake to celebrate the season. And if you don't see your favorite locally baked king cake listed, let us know. We'd love to be forced to eat another cake in the name of "research." Just remember, if you get the baby in your slice, you have to buy the next one. That's how king cake season works and how the good times roll on. {in}

a&e

King of King Cakes

Oh Snap! Cream Cheese King Cake / photos by Samantha Crooke

*Mardi Gras continues to grow each year. If you don’t see your krewe’s events feel free to send your press re-leases and event info to [email protected] for next year’s calendar.

You can have your cake and repent later.

THE GRADING SCALE: Appearance, Texture, Toppings,

Sweetness, Overall Flavor, Filling, Baby (baked in or out)

THE CAKES:Oh Snap! Cream Cheese King

Cake, $17. 707 E. Cervantes St. 466-3363

Sluggo's Vegan King Cake, $26. 101 S. Jefferson St. 791-6501

J's Bakery Blueberry Cream Cheese King Cake, $11.50. 2014 N.

12th Ave. 432-4180.

Nancy's Raspberry Cream Cheese King Cake, $10. 555 Scenic Hwy.

434-0122

Page 15: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 15

OH SNAP! CREAM CHEESE KING CAKE SLUGGO'S VEGAN KING CAKE

J'S BAKERY BLUEBERRY CREAM CHEESE KING CAKE NANCY'S RASPBERRY CREAM CHEESE KING CAKE

overal l winner

SLUGGO'S VEGAN KING CAKE

most original

*GLUTEN FREE OPTION ALSO AVAILABLE

Appearance 9

Texture 8

Toppings 7

Sweetness 9

Overall Flavor 8

Filling cream cheese

Baby baked in? yes

Appearance 6

Texture 7

Toppings 10 - dinos!

Sweetness 5

Overall Flavor 6

Filling none, pecans on bottom

Baby baked in? even better, a dino

Appearance 6

Texture 7

Toppings 6

Sweetness 8

Overall Flavor 7

Filling blueberry

Baby baked in? yes, but a non-traditional one

Appearance 8

Texture 7

Toppings 6

Sweetness 8

Overall Flavor 7

Filling raspberry

Baby baked in? yes

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16 inweekly.net16

For those who say that the symphony isn’t a visual experience have to see Pensacola Symphony Orchestra’s annual Cirque de la Symphonie, a POPS! Series event.

“This is not something you get to see every day, a live symphony orchestra perform-ing alongside acrobats, contortionists, clowns and jugglers,” said Matt Fossa, principal oboist for PSO. “It’s a wonderful integration of many di� erent kinds of artistry.”

Because this performance is not your average evening at the symphony, this might be the time to try out something new.

“The multimedia sensation of having activity on stage to watch while popular orchestra music plays would make this a great

event for people who either never heard the symphony or don’t fi nd enjoyment in listening to an orchestra and watching the players,” Fossa said.

Bringing in a new audience is precisely why PSO tries to engage everyone—whether they’re die-hard classi-cal music lovers or not.

“In this day and age, versatility is extremely important,” Fossa explained. “Everyone in this area is a potential audience member and reaching out to them in new and innovative ways by presenting a variety of appealing programs is vital.”

Fossa not only loves getting the chance to engage new audience members, but to remind everyone that the

Pensacola community has a rich, arts culture.

“Pensacola is far more than just another beach and resort town,” he said. “The vi-brant, artistic and musical community here has a very important role in defining our city’s culture.”

The support to the symphony—as well as other non-profit arts—benefits the entire community.

“Supporting the symphony enables us to continue to be a part of that cultural defi nition and also gives us more opportunities to provide high-quality entertainment and educational experiences for our citizen,” Fossa said. “In turn, this makes more people interested in visiting or even living and doing their business here.”

While performers juggle and flip about the stage, with the soundtrack provided by the symphony, the audience is treated to sensory overload.

“The intensity of this performance will be far, far greater because everything is happen-ing live and with any live performance, there is a special kind of energy and connection

with the audience that cannot be achieved any other way,” Fossa said.

While the performance will be truly original—and a real fi rst for anyone who hasn’t seen a Cirque de la Symphonie perfor-mance—the music will be familiar.

“This truly will be a ‘Classical Pops’ con-cert featuring pieces the audience has most likely heard before,” Fossa said.

Many of the great composers will be rep-resented Fossa said. The set list of the night will feature music by Tchaikovsky, Bi-zet, Dvorak, Saint-Saens and Chabrier to name a few.

“Truly all the pieces are wonder-ful,” Fossa said. “I’m looking forward to Saint-Saens’ ‘Bacchanale.’ I’ll be kicking o� that piece o� with a big oboe solo and later, as the piece goes on, a melody appears that will prob-ably make everyone think of snake charmers in the desert.”

This month, Fossa has been a part of PSO for 11 years.

“It’s been a wonderful experience getting to perform with other outstanding area musi-cians, many of whom have become not just colleagues, but good friends, and, in one case, even family,” he said.

In that past decade, Fossa has enjoyed working hard at something he is so passionate about.

“It’s great when your job doesn’t feel like work,” he said. “Don’t get me wrong, there’s work involved in terms of preparing my part to the best of my ability, but the feeling I get when on stage and adding my ‘voice’ into the carefully crafted textures of the orchestra pieces is, well, transcendent.”

When it comes to the next 11 years and beyond, Fossa is optimistic.

“So far, we have been moving on and ever upward and I look

forward to many more seasons with this fan-tastic group of supremely talented artists,” he said.

Although Fossa can’t decide which per-formance is his favorite, Cirque de la Sym-phonie is high on the list.

“This season, overall, has been terrifi c for me so it’s hard to pick a favorite concert,” he said. “I would say this is my favorite POPS! Concert because great music is being pre-sented in an exciting and innovating way.” {in}

by Jennie McKeonculture

Cirque de la Symphonie

CIRQUE DE LA SYMPHONIEWHEN: 8 p.m. Saturday, February 9WHERE: Saenger Theatre, 118 S. PalafoxCOST: $20 to $82DETAILS: pensacolasymphony.com or pen-sacolasaenger.com

with the audience that cannot be achieved any other way,” Fossa said.

While the performance will be truly

forward to many more seasons with this fan-tastic group of supremely talented artists,” he said.

“This is not something you get to see every day, a live sym-phony orchestra performing alongside acrobats, contor-tionists, clowns and jugglers.”Matt Fossa

Cirque acrobats Alexander Streltsov and Christine Van Loo / courtesy photo

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Page 17: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 17

THURSDAY 2.7‘ANNUAL YOUTH ART FOCUS’ 10 a.m. through Mar 2. Pensacola Museum of Art, 407 S. Jeffer-son St. 432-6247 or pensacolamuseumofart.org.‘THE STEWART COLLECTION OF AFRICAN ART’ 10 a.m. through Mar 2. Pensacola Museum of Art, 407 S. Jefferson St. 432-6247 or pensaco-lamuseumofart.org.‘FLORIDA: A CELEBRATION OF 500 YEARS’ JURIED ART SHOW 10 a.m. through Mar 1. Artel Gallery, 223 S. Palafox. 432-3080 or artelgallery.org.‘EDUCATIONAL COMPLEX EDIT’ 10 a.m. TAG Gallery at University of West Florida, 11000 Univer-sity Pkwy. 474-2696 or tag82uwf.wordpress.com.‘A ROADTRIP THROUGH FLORIDA ARCHAEOL-OGY’ 10 a.m. Thursdays. DARC, 207 E. Main St. 595-0050, ext. 107 or fl publicarchaeology.org/darc.php.HISTORIC PENSACOLA TROLLEY TOUR 10 & 2 p.m. Tuesdays and Thursdays. Pensacola Visitor Center, 1401 E. Gregory St. 941-2876 or beachbumtrolley.com.PLAY HAPPY HOUR 4 p.m. Play, 16 S. Palafox, Suite 100. 466-3080 or iplaypensacola.com.SANDY SANSING 37TH ANNUAL SPELLING BEE 5 p.m. Pensacola State College Ashmore

Fine Arts Auditorium, 1000 College Blvd. For more information, call 475-2969.WINE TASTING AT AWM 5 p.m. Aragon Wine Market, 27 S. Ninth Ave. 433-9463 or aragon-winemarket.com.DIABETES SEMINAR 5:30 p.m. Free. Florida Blue, 1680 Airport Blvd. Please call 202-4188 to register. BODY, MIND & SPIRIT COFFE AND TEA CONVERSATION SOCIAL 6 p.m. Our Place, 811 Garden St. Call 941-4321 or visit bmsfl.com for more information. IRON RHINO OUTSIDE FITNESS BOOT CAMP 6 p.m. Veteran’s Park, Bayfront Pkwy. For more infor-mation, call 292-4070 or visit ironrhinofi tness.com. VEGAN DINNER AT EOTL 6 p.m. End of the Line Café, 610 E. Wright St. 429-0336 or eotlcafe.com.AFRICAN DRUMMING CLASSES 6:30 p.m. $2-$5. Gull Point Community Center, 7000 Spanish Trail. For more information contact, 291-2718, 324-4928 or hurreyupstageandfilmworks.com.

happenings

If you’re looking to buy a one-of-a-kind gift for your Valentine who has it all, check out Blue Morning Gallery for jewelry, original cards made by member artists and plenty of gift ideas that go beyond the standard bouquet of flowers.

While the Valentine-themed window places an emphasis on jewelry—and even though there are some masculine pieces—there are other gift options for males.

“The display window also has appro-priate art by other member artists includ-ing tile art by Mark Schmitt,” said member artist Connie Wendleton. “Mark’s tile work in the gallery also includes collegiate sports themes, most suitable for sports-loving guys or gals. Also, appropriate gifts for men are the turned-wood pieces by Dick McNeil.”

Scattered throughout the entire gallery are other distinctive gift options. Special gift wrapping will also be available.

“The entire gallery displays work that would make terrifi c, unique gifts,” Wendleton said. “From large paintings and photographs to small pottery pieces and with prices ranging from over $100 to as low as $8, there’s something for everyone and every budget.”

As a special Valentine’s date, take your sweetheart to Blue Morning Gallery on Friday, February 8 to meet the participat-ing jewelers, enjoy treats and let them pick out a gift (or two). {in}

Thinking Outside the Box (of Chocolates)

by Jennie McKeon

VALENTINE’S SHOW OPENING RECEPTIONWHEN: 4 p.m. Friday, February 8WHERE: Blue Morning Gallery, 21 S. PalafoxDETAILS: 429-9100; bluemorning-gallery.com

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happenings

You don’t have to spend big bucks at an ex-clusive restaurant – although there’s nothing wrong with that. However, if you’re looking to really impress your date try originality. Discovering something or someplace new is not only a refresh-ing change of pace, but lets your date know you put extra thought in your special night. Whether you’re celebrating Valentine’s Day early, late or on the day of, there’s plenty to see and do with the one you love.♥ 2.8 JEWELRY RECEPTION AT BLUE MORN-ING GALLERY Blue Morning Gallery artists will be focusing on Valentine’s Day with a show featuring

unique jewelry. On Friday, February 8 from 4 to 9 p.m., you can take your sweetheart over to the gallery, located at 21 S. Palafox St., to meet the jewelers and view the gallery – maybe even let them pick out a special piece. The gal-lery will also o� er one-of-a-kind Valentine’s Day cards and special gift wrapping. The show will be on display through March 8. For more information, call 429-9100. ♥ 2.9 VALENTINE

DATE WITH YOUR PET On February 9, bring your furry feline or canine friend to Your Dog’s Business, located at 4771 Bayou Blvd., from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. for a free Valentine’s Day picture and free doggie pizza. Dress your pet in a festive pink or red ribbon or bring their favorite stu� ed toy to make the picture even more special. For more informa-tion, call 466-3057.♥ 2.8 & 2.9 LOVE IS IN THE AIR The Panhandle Community Theatre, located at 4646 Woodbine Rd., Pace, will present a Valentine-themed evening will feature music, food and of course romance.

Enjoy the Gulf Coast Choral singing love songs, heavy hors d’oeurves, beverages and desserts as well as dramatic readings including the balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet, Elizabeth Barrett Browning’s “How Do I Love Thee,” “She Walks in Beauty,” by Lord Byron, “If” by Rudyard Kipling as well as works by local authors. Tickets are $30 per couple, $15 per person. For reservations, call 324-9279 or email [email protected]. For more information, visit panhandlecommunitytheatre.com.♥ 2.9 FREE CANDLELIGHT TOUR AT FORT PICKENS For the history bu� in your life, take them on a candlelight tour of Fort Pickens. The free tour will highlight the history of Pensacola during the Civil War. The tours run from 5 to 7:15 p.m. and begins at Gulf Islands National Seashore, 1801 Gulf Breeze Pkwy. Visitors must call 934-2635 for tour reservations and arrive 20 minutes before your assigned tour time. For more information, visit nps.gov/guis.♥ 2.11 BLUE WAHOOS VALENTINE DELIV-ERY Go ahead and order your sports fan a Blue Wahoos Valentine’s Day gift basket featuring gift cards and souvenirs delivered personally Kazoo, the Blue Wahoos’ mascot. Deliveries will be made from Monday, February 11 to Thursday, February 14 from 8:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. Delivery slots will be reserved on a fi rst-come, fi rst-served basis. Gift baskets and deliveries range from $100 to $250, which includes delivery within 20 miles of Bayfront

Stadium. Gift orders must be made by 5 p.m. on February 8. Order forms can be found on bluewa-hoos.com or call Denise Richardson at 934-8444 for more information. ♥ 2.13, 2.14 & 2.15 VALENTINE’S IN PARADISE PACKAGE The Valentine’s in Paradise Package at Margaritaville Beach Hotel includes two Love Potion Margaritas and two signature “Love on the Rocks” keepsake Margaritaville glasses along with chocolate tru¦ es, a four-course dinner for two on February 14 and a special rate for an additional night stay. The package and additional night is valid for February 13-15. You can book your stay by calling 916-9755.♥ 2.14 VALENTINE’S DAY AT JACKSON’S Jack-son’s, located at 400 S. Palafox, will be open for lunch starting at 11 a.m. until 2 p.m. and will o� er dinner starting at 5 p.m. Chef Irv Miller has pre-pared a special lunch and dinner Valentine’s menu in addition to the fall/winter menu. To reserve your table, call 469-9898. For more information, visit jacksons.goodgrits.com.♥ 2.14 VALENTINE’S DAY AT HILTON PEN-SACOLA BEACH Head to the Hilton Pensacola Beach, 12 Via de Luna, for a four-course dinner at H2O’s Cajun Asian Grill. The dinner is $140 per couple and includes and wine pairing menu. You can also sign up for a two-night getaway. The package includes a two night stay, bottle of cham-pagne, chocolate dipped strawberries and bu� et breakfast for $164. For more information, call 916-

A One-of-a-Kind Valentine’s Date

8 Windows by Don Huber, featured artwork from Ballet Pensacola and Pensacola Museum of Art’s “Possible Symmetry” show

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February 7, 2013 19

happenings2999 or visit hiltonpensacolabeach.com.♥ 2.14 VALENTINE’S DAY AT THE FISH HOUSE Chef Billy Ballou of the Fish House, lo-cated at 600 S. Barracks St., has prepared a lunch and two dinner features for the special day. The original lunch and dinner menus will be available as well. Lunch is from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. and dinner begins at 5 p.m. For more information, visit 470-0003 or visit fi shhouse.goodgrits.com. ♥ 2.14 VALENTINE’S DAY SUPPER CLUB AT THE MAGNOLIA Choose between two seatings, 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. or 8 to 10 p.m. for an evening of fi ne dining plus champagne and wine pairings at The Magnolia, 2907 E Cervantes St. The cost is $65 per person. Seats will fi ll up quickly, call 912-6196 or email [email protected] to make your reservation. ♥ 2.14 PRETTY THINGS PEEPSHOW-VALEN-TINE’S DAY SHOW For a Valentine’s Day that won’t be forgotten, take your date to the Pretty Things Peepshow at Vinyl Music Hall, located at 2 S. Palafox, for an Valentine-themed evening of sword swallowing, juggling, burlesque and more. Tickets are $12-$20. The show starts at 8 p.m. For more information, visit vinylmusichall.com.♥ 2.14, 2.15, 2.16 & 2.17 POSSIBLE SYMMETRY In this fi rst-time collaboration, Ballet Pensacola and Pensacola Museum of Art are bringing you an evening consisting of various mediums – art, dance and music. Performances will begin at 7 p.m. Thursday-Saturday and 2 p.m. on Sunday, inside Pensacola Museum of Art, 407 S. Jef-ferson St. Tickets are $18 and can be purchased through Ballet Pensacola at 432-9546. For more information, visit balletpensacola.com♥ 2.15 & 2.16 VALENTINE MOVIES AT SAENGER Don’t just take your date to see an overpriced movie. Take them to the beautiful Saenger, where the tickets are cheaper and the fl oor isn’t sticky. On Friday, February 15, the Saenger will show “Sleepless in Seattle” starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan – no matter how many times you’ve seen it, one more won’t hurt. On Saturday, “An A� air to Remember” will be

shown. According to the American Film Institute it is “one of the most romantic fi lms of all time.” Showtimes are 7 p.m. each night. Tickets are $5 each and can be purchased at the Saenger Theatre box o¡ ce. Movies will be seated on fi rst-come-fi rst-serve basis. The box o¡ ce will open one-hour prior to show time. For more information, visit pensacolasaenger.com.♥ 2.15, 2.16 & 2.17 SHAKESPEARE & CHAM-PAGNE: LOVE DRUNK No one is more romantic than Shakespeare and just in case you need something to wash down all of the mushy feel-ings, try Pensacola Shakespeare Theatre’s Love Drunk. Shakespearean love scenes and sonnets are given a new life with the drinking scenes added to the mix. The performances will be held at Plaza de Luna. Friday and Saturday shows will begin at 7 p.m. and Sunday at 4 p.m. All tickets include two glasses of Korbel California Champagne – but you must be 21 or older to enjoy. Make a night of the evening and reserve the dinner package, $160 for two which includes two VIP tickets, one bottle of Korbel and two commemorative champagne fl utes. Show tickets are $20 for students, $25 for bistro standing and $30 for VIP seats. For more information, visit pensacolashakespearetheatre.org.♥ 2.14-2.17 & 2.21-2.23 SHORT ATTENTION SPAN THEATRE This popular might of “love, hate, friendship, comedy” is back for its ninth installment at Pensacola Little Theatre, located at 400 S. Je� erson St. The night consists of one-act plays that fi nd the humor in romance and relationships. Most of the plays are original and unpublished, some will be shown on the stage for the fi rst time. Thursday, Friday and Saturday performances start at 7:30 p.m. and 2:30 p.m. on Sundays. Tickets are $10 for general admission or $17 for limited café seating. On Valentine’s Day, starting at 8 p.m., complete your night with a special performance, martinis and dessert. Tickets are $50 per couple, $25 per person. To purchase tickets call 432-2042 or visit pensaco-lalittletheatre.com.

If your Valentine is a foodie, don’t hesitate in making a reservation for The Magnolia’s Valentine’s Day Supper Club.

Choose between the 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. or 8 to 10 p.m. seating on Thursday, February 14.

Much like everything that Chef Kiley Bolster creates, the menu is full of inven-tive flavors that will keep your special date night from being boring. Start with blue cheese and walnut shortbread with honeyed cream cheese spread, then onto the citrus shrimp salad and sherried Por-tobello and brie bisque.

For your entrée, enjoy a cocoa rubbed fi let complete with sweet potato and asiago cheese gratin and tru¦ ed haricot verts. And to top it o� , for dessert, fl ourless chocolate cakes served with raspberry cou-lis, Bailey’s Irish Cream mousse layered with vanilla sponge cake and macerated berries. The meal also comes with champagne and wine pairings.

You can also take your Valentine’s Day meal to go, with wine included. Just call or email for details.

Of course, the dimly lit ambience of The Magnolia will only add to the roman-tic evening. As a favor, The Magnolia will send you home with an assortment of hand-rolled truffles. Spots are limited and expected to sell quickly, reserve your spot now. {in}

Valentine’s Day at The Magnoliaby Jennie McKeon

VALENTINE’S DAY SUPPER CLUBWHEN: 5:30 or 8 p.m. Thursday, February 14WHERE: The Magnolia, 2907 E. Cervantes St.COST: $65 per personDETAILS: 912-6196 or [email protected]

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Glenn Breed is a man who knows the importance of the right outfi t. In real life, one might wear something in an attempt to better convey themselves to the outside world, but on a stage, the clothing sometimes says more about the character than they say themselves. It can be used to set the time period, the stature of the character’s class, and occasionally, a person’s sense of humor. Breed has been designing costumes for years and has currently been heavily involved with revamping the UWF Theater. He’s construct-ed costumes for one of Steve Martin’s plays; he’s created a state of the art costume design program for UWF students and has been able to construct costumes for characters all over the country. On Thursday, Breed will lecture on how clothes really do make the man, at least in his case.

IN: How long have you been designing costumes?BREED: I have been a costume designer for roughly 14 Years. I started right out of high school working with a costume rental company. 

IN: Did you attend school or have you had extensive training for honing this talent?BREED: I have a B.A. in Theatri-cal Design from St. Edwards University in Austin, Texas and a M.F.A in Costume Design and Technol-ogy from the University of Cincinnati Col-

lege-Conservatory of Music.  

IN: Do you remember what the first costume you designed was or what work it was for?BREED: Early on in my career I had the honor of designing the costumes for Steve Martin’s “Picasso at the Lapin Agile,” and the show is a very funny comedy. I cos-tumed the character of Pablo Picasso in all shades of blue as Picasso was in the middle of his blue period when the show took place. This sort of costume joke and hint was not just my secret but referenced in the reviews as a “comic wink” from the designer.

IN: How long have you been with UWF and how has your time there been?BREED: This is my seventh year at UWF. I am a Tenured Associate Professor of Theatre Design and Technology. I founded the costume program at UWF, prior to my arrival most costumes at UWF were rented or pulled. I have built a state of the art cos-tume program that students from all over the state come to attend.  

IN: Your lecture is coming up Thurs-day—will you also be displaying some of your favorite work?BREED: The lecture is an hour and at the end of it, I will have students wearing many of my creations from the last seven years of work.  

IN: What will your lecture focus on?BREED: My lecture is titled “ How Clothes Made the Man” and shows the journey of what it is that I really do, as a costume designer and my background of how I have gotten to where I am. The piece focuses on why the liberal arts are so important to the community we live in.  

IN: What are the most exciting or enjoyable pieces for you to create?BREED: I enjoy all the work that I create. I feel that getting to express myself through the costumes that characters wear is the most reward-ing thing I do. I can help to create not only the world of the play but tell stories that have been told and will be told for years to come.  

IN: Do you currently design pieces for local clientele as well as regional?

BREED: I design all over the United States, but my main clients are Pensacola Opera, the Janiec Opera Company and Fiesta of Five Flags of Pensacola, as well as UWF.  

IN: What are some of the things you have been proudest to work on?BREED: Teaching is actually the thing I am proudest of; I feel that giving what I have learned to my students in the form of continu-ing education is the proudest moment. I love to watch a student understand what I mean or see something of my work and watch how they process it and understand why design and construction are important life skills. 

IN: Is there a certain time period, style, or movement that you find yourself really drawn to?BREED: I am drawn to anything with trim! I love the details, from buttons to edges to piping to anything that finishes a costume. But I also have come to appreci-ate the fine fabrics that require no adornment as well.  

IN: What’s next for you?BREED: Well to continue to educate and grow my own career and take the UWF Theatre to

the next level in becoming a lead-ing training program in the state of Florida and in the U.S. {in}

by Hana Frenetteculture

Clothes for the Stage

‘HOW CLOTHES MADE THE MAN’ BY GLENN BREEDWHEN: 5:30 p.m. refreshments, 6 p.m. lecture and costume display, Thursday, Feb. 7WHERE: Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Je� erson St. DETAILS: uwf.edu/cas/downtownseries/

IN: What are the most exciting or enjoyable pieces for you to create?

ing training program in the state of Florida and in the U.S.

“Getting to express myself through the costumes that characters wear is the most rewarding thing I do.”Glenn Breed

Glenn Breed’s costume designs for “Tintypes”  from the Janiec Opera Com-pany at Brevard Music Center, directed by Dean Anthony. / courtesy photo

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Page 21: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 21

Although New Orleans and Mobile have laid their rightful claim to fame with the Mardi Gras season, the third annual Par-di Gras electronic music micro-festival is out to show that Pensacola has plenty of culture to go around.

“A lot of people don’t realize how many talented, self-made people there are in the area. I want this event to be a way for people to learn that and connect with like-minded Pensacolians,” show producer Shaun Ho-lifield said of his event. “We’ve moved to a larger location at the downtown American Legion so that we can accommodate more of the artists, vendors, and dancers that are the lifeblood of this town.”

Twin brothers Charles (Sir Charles) and Zach Weinert (Greenhouse Lounge, Zak the Blak) headline the music with their joint project by the name of Monozygotik. Grow-ing up with a choir and violin background and a household that funneled music from Prince to Dean Martin through its speakers, they were bound to pursue music in some way.

“My parents loved funk and disco when we were kids, so needless to say, we jammed in the house,” Charles said.

Monozygotik’s sound runs the electron-ic gamut from Southern hip hop-infused trap music to the futuristic experimental

beats that are beginning to make waves through-out the community. On how different styles come from two people with such similar backgrounds, Charles claims there’s enough uniqueness to them in the long run.

“It’s like comparing Granny Smith and red apples,” he said. “It’s the same general goodness, but with a bit dif-ferent taste.”

Atlanta-based future and glitch-hop D.J. Satoru will be sup-porting Mono-zygotik, along with locals Pensacobra, Mindflo, and Grateful Funk.

Joining the D.J.s on stage will be local hula hooper Meghan Kellin-son. Her jazz, tap, ballet, and theater background comes through in her free-flowing perfor-mances. Her main goal at

these events is to supplement the music in an artful way.

“When I get a chance to perform I try to bring a dance art form that some may be unfamiliar with. I like to add a touch of class and artistic elegance through joyous kinetic movement,” Kellinson said.

She also sees hooping as a way to con-nect with the local community. “Hoops are really something of a conversation starter. They have allowed me to connect with peo-ple I otherwise might not have. I once even traded a hula hoop for an organic chicken from a farmer friend.” She’s an obvious fit for the event.

Along with that visual stimulation, live painting and drawing will be done by local artists Austin Garcia, Chris Loriz, Scott Bond, and David Trippe. What Garcia likes most of the experience is having people see the entire creation process from start to fi nish.

“The people motivate me to keep on painting. I get as anxious and excited as they do to see the finished piece,” he said.

Custom is the name of the game when it comes to the boutique vendors that will be on-site. Jamie

Hullenbaugh of Blu Magpie Design will have her self-proclaimed “hippie bling” avail-able. She’s found that events like these have helped get her name out in the area, and she’s got some special plans for Mardi Gras-themed jewelry.

“I am going to have a lot more brightly colored, blingy feather type items for every-one,” she said. “I also like making sure my jewelry and other crafted items are priced so that anyone attending an event can go home with something.”

Another local vendor on tap is Trace Reddick of MetaSpace Designs. The

company’s mission is to help give people a legal way to make money at shows while on the road following their favorite bands.

“MetaSpace really picked up steam in early 2010. I noticed I had a knack for some artistic designs when I sold 50 patches I designed at a STS9 show in Boston in 2009 and people kept asking for more,” the self-proclaimed millennial entrepreneur said of the company’s origins.

Although the majority of Reddick’s busi-ness is steeped in the one of-a-kind hatpins that have swept the music world in the last few years, he also does custom lapel pins for area businesses.

What festival would be worth its weight without a bit of food? Pensacola Beach’s own Dog House Deli will be catering the event, complete with specially curated Mardi Gras themed dogs. It’s an opportunity to showcase some new flavors and spread the word about the catering part of their restaurant. {in}

by Brett Hutchinsmusic

Sense of Community Fuels Local Music Micro-festival

3RD ANNUAL PARDI GRASWHAT: Pardi Gras with Monozygotik and SatoruWHERE: American Legion Post 33, 1401 W. Intendencia St.WHEN: 9 p.m. Saturday, Feb. 9COST: $10 advance; $12 at doorDETAILS: 3rdannualpardigras.eventbrite.com

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PENSACOLA YOUNG PROFESSIONALS PICK “TOP THREE” URAC RECOMMENDATIONS VOTE TO SUPPORT CULTURAL HERITAGE TOURISM, DOWNTOWN HOUSING, BUSINESS INVESTMENT

Over 150 people including Mayor Ashton Hayward, several Pensacola City Council members, past-Mayor Jerry Maygarden, various members of the Greater Pen-sacola Chamber Board of Directors, and LeaP Alumni assembled at the Fish House Deck on January 22 to hear an open forum discussion on the URAC (Urban Redevelopment Advisory Committee) Report.

This forum was hosted by the Pensacola Young Professionals (PYP), Seville Rotary, Propeller Club, and Port of Pensacola Us-ers Association. Mayor Ashton Hayward and Brian Hooper, URAC Chairman, joined Alan Gray, PYP’s Government Affairs Chairman, to lead the discussion and URAC committee members John Myslak, Stephanie Powell, and Dr. Ken Ford participated as panelists as all ten recommendations were discussed.

PYP members in attendance were given ballots and asked to vote for their “top three” recommendations. The three targets selected by PYP to help imple-ment are cultural heritage tourism, more affordable downtown housing, and a simplified process for investors who want to build downtown.

The number one recommendation supported by Pensacola Young Profes-sionals is a concerted effort to increase Pensacola’s cultural heritage tourism. PYP members are ready to support the development of Pensacola into a premier destination for cultural and historical tourism.

The second recommendation chosen by PYP is to support the initiative for an infill housing program that will create more affordable housing in the down-town area. Young professionals are very eager to live in our city’s downtown core, yet there is a lack of affordable housing. Creating more affordable housing will help populate our downtown area, which will in turn improve the appearance, the safety, and the level of commercial investment in the area.

The third recommendation PYP selected is to help the City simplify the Land De-velopment Code (LDC) and create a “one-stop shop” for investors and developers. This would change the process so that interested investors could appear before a single development review commit-tee instead of presenting to numerous city departments in order to get project approval.

In the past, potential developers did not invest in our city because of the lengthy and convoluted process for getting per-mits and permissions. Taking the steps outlined in the URAC Report will greatly speed up the process for launching new businesses and construction projects, thereby boosting the economy and help-ing fill in the vacant or derelict properties throughout the downtown area.

The Mayor has tasked Clark Merritt, his administrator of the Office of Sustain-ability, with overseeing implementation of the URAC recommendations and ac-tion items. PYP will work closely with Mr. Merritt on the implementation of its “top three” URAC initiatives. It is the mission of the Pensacola Young Professionals to share our passion for and belief in the Pensacola Bay Area, and to act as a catalyst for positive change in our community. By identifying important recommendations in the URAC Report and urging our city leaders to implement them, PYP is indeed doing its part to make Pensacola an even more amazing place to live, work, and play.

For more information on PYP, visit www.pensacolayp.com or contact Direc-tor Rachael Gillette (850) 332-7820

For more information on URAC, visit www.ci.pensacola.fl.us/boards/urac.

PYP would like to recognize our members who were selected as 2013 Rising Stars by the Independent News:

AARON JONESADRIENNE MAYGARDEN

AMBER KELLEYANDREA LYONSANDY TERHAAR

AUTUMN MORRISBARRIE ARNOLD

CHRIS RITCHIEDAVE BRANDEBERRY

HONG TRANJOEL FLEEKOP

JOSEPH MCNAIRLAUREN HOLSTMAN

LEIA BRUNELINDSAY RAE MYERS

MATT PEACOCKMELANIE MOFFETT

NATALIE SMITHTAYLOR SIMMONS

TOM COADY

Congratulations to each of you and we look forward to seeing you continue to shine in 2013!

EVENT CALENDAR

FEBRUARY 11BOARD MEETING5:15 PM IMS EXPERT SERVICES

FEBRUARY 12ED & GA TEAM MEETING5:30 PM CAVU CROWNE PLAZA

FEBRUARY 13MBR & NET TEAM MEETING5:30 PM BONEFISH GRILL

FEBRUARY 18Y2B A PYP: THE SEQUEL!5:30 PM IMS EXPERT SERVICES

FEBRUARY 19PPDI TEAM MEETING12:00 PM APPLE ANNIE’S

FEBRUARY 21SPONSOR APPRECIATION5:30 PM ATLAS OYSTER BAR

FEBRUARY 27QOL TEAM MEETING5:30 PM FISH HOUSE

FEBRUARY 28NETWORKING NIGHT5:30 PM TBD

CONTACT US AT WWW.PENSACOLAYP.COM

For more information on Pensacola Young Professionals or to

join please see our website Pensacolayp.com or contact

Director Rachael Gillette Pensacola Young Professionals

41 N. Jefferson St. Ste 108 Pensacola FL 32502

(850) 332-7820

PYP RISING STARS

Page 23: Feb. 7, 2013 issue

February 7, 2013 23

ONE FOR THE ROAD Cliche Come to Life: The Kerry, Ireland, county council voted in January to let some people drive drunk. The councillors reasoned that in the county’s isolated regions, some seniors live alone and need the camaraderie of the pub, but fear a DUI arrest on the way home. The councillors thus empowered police to is-sue DUI permits to those targeted drivers. Besides, reasoned the councillors, the area is so sparsely populated that such drivers never encounter anyone else on the road at night. (The councillors’ beneficence might also have been influenced, reported BBC News, by the fact that “several” of the five voting “yea” own pubs.)

CAN’T POSSIBLY BE TRUE Spare the Waterboard, Spoil the Child: William Province, 42, was arrested in Jefferson County, Mont., in December and charged with waterboarding four boys, two of whom were his own sons, at his home in Decem-ber. (Also in January, Kirill Bartashevitch, 52, was charged with making “terroristic” threats to his high-school-age daughter after he allegedly pointed his new AK-47 at her because her report card showed 2 B’s instead of all A’s. He said he had recently purchased the gun because he feared that President Obama intended to ban them.)

• Emma Whittington, of Hutchinson, Kan., rushed her daughter to the ER in December when the girl, 7 months old, de-veloped a golf-ball-sized lump on her neck. Two days later, at a hospital in Wichita, a doctor gently pulled a feather out of the lump and hypothesized that it had been in the midst of emerging from her throat. Doctors said the girl probably swallowed the feather accidentally, that it got stuck in throat tissue, and that her body was trying to eject it through the skin.

• As if 9/11 and the resultant air travel restrictions had never happened, travelers for some reason continue to keep Trans-portation Security Administration agents busy at passengers’ carry-on bag searches. From a TSA weekly summary of confisca-tions in January: 33 handguns, eight stun guns and a serrated wire garrote. Among highlights from 2012: a live 40mm grenade, a live blasting cap, “seal bombs” and six pounds of black power (with detonation cords and a timing fuse).

• A man with admittedly limited English skills went to a courthouse in Springfield, Mass., in December to address a traffic ticket, but somehow wound up on a jury trying Donald Campbell on two counts of assault. Officials said the man simply got in the wrong line and followed jurors into a room while the real sixth juror had mistakenly gone to another room. The jury, including the accidental juror, found Campbell guilty, but he was awarded a new trial when the mistake was discovered.

THE REDNECK CHRONICLES (TENNES-SEE EDITION) (1) Timothy Crabtree, 45, of Rogersville, was arrested in October and charged with stabbing his son, Brandon, 21, in an argument over who would get the last beer in the house. (2) Tricia Moody, 26, was charged with DUI in Knoxville in January after a 10-minute police chase. The officer’s report noted that Moody was still holding a cup of beer and apparently had not spilled any during the chase. (3) Jerry Poe, 62, was charged in a road-rage incident in Clinton on Black Friday after firing his handgun at a driver in front of him “to scare her into moving” faster, he said. (Poe said he had started at midnight at one Wal-Mart, waited in line unsuccessfully for five hours for a sale-priced stereo, and was on his way to another Wal-Mart.

SOUNDS LIKE A JOKE Twin brothers Aric Hale and Sean Hale, 28, were both arrested on New Year’s Eve in Manchester, Conn., after fighting each other at a hotel and later at a residence. Police said a 27-year-old woman was openly dating the two men, and that Sean thought it was his turn and asked Aric for privacy. Aric begged to differ about whose turn it was.

PERSPECTIVE First-World Problems: Be-fore “cellulite” appeared in popular culture around 1972, almost no one believed the condition especially remarkable, wrote London’s The Guardian in December. Similarly, the new concern about “wob-bly” arms—flesh dangling loosely when a woman’s arm is raised horizontally—seems entirely made-up. However, Marks & Spen-cer and other upscale British retailers now sell “arm corsets” to fashionably hold the skin tighter for sleeveless tops. Wrote the Guardian columnist, “I wish I didn’t know that my arms weren’t meant to wobble. I’d be happier.”

PEOPLE DIFFERENT FROM US Julie Griffiths, 43, of Newcastle-Under-Lyme, England, received her first Anti-Social Be-havior Order in 1999 for too loudly berating her husband, Norman (who one neighbor told the Daily Telegraph is “the sweetest man you could ever meet”). After many complaints (from neighbors, never from Norman), Griffiths was fined the equiva-lent of about $700 in 2010 and vowed to be quieter. The complaints hardly slowed, and in July 2012, environmental-health officials installed monitoring equipment next door and caught Griffiths venting at Norman 47 times in three months. However, the Stoke-on-Trent Magistrates Court merely issued a new, five-year ASBO. {in}

by Chuck Shepherdnews of the weird

Send your weird news to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa, Fla., 33679 or [email protected], or go to newsoftheweird.com

From Universal Press Syndicate Chuck Shepherd’s News Of The Weird

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