Building Intimacy in Your Small Group and Facilitating Excellent Discussions with Dr. Randy Wollf
Build a Healthy Group Culture Non-judgemental Honest/transparent Safe Process oriented Concerned about the other Cloud, Henry and John Townsend. Making Small Groups Work: What Every Small Group Leader Needs to Know. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2003. 71.
John 13:34-35 - A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. Rom. 13:8; 1 Pet. 1:22; 1 Jn. 3:11, 23; 4:7, 11-12; 2 Jn. 1:5 Love One Another
1 Thess. 5:11 - Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. 1 Thess. 4:18; Heb. 3:13 Encourage One Another
Rom. 15:7 - Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God. Accept One Another
Eph. 4:32 - Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Be Kind to One Another
Rom. 12:16 - Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. [a] Do not be conceited.a Live in Harmony with One Another
Eph. 4:32 - Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Col. 3:13 Forgive One Another
1 Pet. 4:9 - Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Be Hospitable to One Another
Rom. 12:10 - Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Be Devoted to One Another
Rom. 12:10 - Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Honour One Another
Col. 3:16 - Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. Teach and Admonish One Another
1 Jn. 3:16 - This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. Lay Down Your Lives for One Another
If you were to pick one of the one anothers to emphasize over the next month in your small group, what would it be? Group Discussion
Invest Time in Building Community Between meetings Prayer for each other Social media One-on-one coffee times Mentoring relationships and accountability groups Touching base Fun group activities
Invest Time in Building Community During meetings Egli, Jim and Dwight Marable. Big Impact: Connecting People to God and One Another in Thriving Groups. ChurchSmart Resources. 2011, p. 68. FocusActionTime WelcomeOpening Question 10 Minutes WitnessPraying for Friends 10 Minutes WordBible Study25 Minutes Worship 15 Minutes WindMinistry30 Minutes
Invest Time in Building Community During meetings Some structure and predictability can promote a sense of safety. Egli, Jim and Dwight Marable. Big Impact: Connecting People to God and One Another in Thriving Groups. ChurchSmart Resources. 2011, p. 68.
Welcome Breaking the Ice If you could choose, in which Olympic sport would you most like to win a gold medal? Why? Whats one thing you wish someone would do for you when youre sick? Finish this sentence: One topic Im interested in learning more about is. One thing Im really looking forward to right now is
Witness Building Communitas communitas describes the dynamics of the Christian community inspired to overcome their instincts to huddle and cuddle and to instead form themselves around a common mission that calls them onto a dangerous journey to unknown places Hirsch, Allan. The Forgotten Ways: Reactivating the Missional Church. Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press. 2006, p. 221.
Witness Building Communitas a mission that calls the church to shake off its collective securities and to plunge into the world of action, where its members will experience disorientation and marginalization but also where they encounter God and one another in a new way. Hirsch, Allan. The Forgotten Ways: Reactivating the Missional Church. Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press. 2006, p. 221.
Witness Building Communitas According Egli and Marables (2011) research, If you want to experience deeper community in your small group, you should make it an open group that actively reaches out to others. Egli, Jim and Dwight Marable. Big Impact: Connecting People to God and One Another in Thriving Groups. ChurchSmart Resources. 2011, p. 37.
Word Facilitating Excellent Community-building Discussion Discovery Questions What does it say? Understanding Questions What does it mean? Application Questions What should I apply to my life?
Word Facilitating Excellent Community-building Discussion Understanding Questions Synonyms What is another word for grace? Definitions How would you define Lord? Differences What is the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation? Similarities How is the church like a human body? Opposites What is the opposite of truth? Relationships How are lordship and obedience related?
Word Facilitating Excellent Community-building Discussion Understanding Questions Examples What are some examples of two being better than one? Why Why do you think Jesus wept over Jerusalem? Explain How would you explain salvation to a child? Extremes Which one of the characteristics How How do you think we can sharpen one another as Christians?
Word Facilitating Excellent Community-building Discussion Application Questions What stands out to you from this passage? What is one thing that you can take from our discussion into your week? How does this ______ (truth, principle, idea) apply to your life? What is the next step for you to live out what God is saying to you through this passage? Can you illustrate this truth with an example from your own life?
Word Facilitating Excellent Community-building Discussion 10 Cs of Quality Questions Concise Complete Clear Connected Conversational Davis, Deena. Discipleship Journals 101 Best Small Group Ideas. Colorado Springs, CO: NavPress, 1996. Contestable Challenging Creative Controversial Considerate
Word Facilitating Excellent Community-building Discussion Questions that are judgmental, negative, or prescriptive can tear down and disempower, while pure questions can provoke greater understanding and motivation. Walling, Terry. Leader Breakthru Coaching Skills, p. 31.
Worship Opening Our Hearts to God and Each Other Encourage people to worship from the heart Take time to pause for God to do a deeper work Allow time for personal sharing Include times of spontaneous worship
Wind Ministry to Each Other Exploring group dynamics Large group prayer What is one thing you want to ask God for? Small group prayer What is hurting you right now? Where would you like to grow in your life? What area of your life is holding you back from experiencing God more? What has God been saying to you tonight?
Wind Ministry to Each Other The Role of Prayer in Your Group Decide prayers place Be sensitive to peoples level of comfort Give freedom Pray about group issues Guide people to expect Gods response Cloud, Henry and John Townsend. Making Small Groups Work: What Every Small Group Leader Needs to Know. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2003. 78-79.
Extend Forgiveness Dig deeper Push a bit Talk about grace/forgiveness Create the right environment Experience grace and forgiveness Make failure an expected event Ibid. 87
Provide Support Attending Validation Assessing reality Ibid. 88-90
Provide Support Groups take over when necessary groups take over where the weak person gives out. They provide love, support, advice, and encouragement when the person just doesnt have the resolve to do something that seems difficult or even impossible (Cloud & Townsend, 90) Identification Ibid. 88-90
Process Grief Together Invite sad, confused and angry emotions Help the person go through the stages Allow the person to continue to process Function as the lost resource Teach about grief and loss Help with faith Ibid. 95-97
Provide a Place for Healing Healing is not the absence of the pain (just like faith is not the absence of fear faith is choosing to walk in right ways despite fear) Healing is knowing the root of pain and not functioning according to the lies I am tempted to believe right now. Ken Dyck, Founder of Freedom Session
Provide a Place for Healing Comfort the hurting Validate their experience and feelings Separate injury