TANGLING WITH TEENS

IS THE BIBLE ANY PRACTICAL HELP?

TANGLING WITH TEENS

IS THE BIBLE ANY PRACTICAL HELP?

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A Few Personal Disclaimers1. A Good Job in Parenting Teens2. A Deep Understanding of Teens

A Formal Definition

No Longer Children but are Still Short of Adulthood [Douglas Powell, Harvard University]

Age Wise: 13 to 19 Years Old Approximately

A Psychological Definition

Becoming Less Ego-Centric

Engaging in More Perspective-Taking

THE CHALLENGES FOR TEENS

They Go Through the Following:

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Summary•A Bewildering Stage of Transition•A Period of Emotional Volatility [Columbine High School Shootings]

Individuation/Separation

• Leading to the Formation of Personal Identity & Values

• Questioning of Authority Figures and Social Norms

Personal Struggles

• Indulging in Masturbation, Pornography or Drugs [Timothy 2:2]

• Testing the Boundaries of Parental Authority

& Toleration

Hormonal Changes

• Resulting in Physical and Psychological Development

• Becoming Moody & Withdrawn at Times

THE NEEDS OF TEENS

The Fundamental Needs are:

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Unconditional Love & Acceptance

• Teens Need the Above More than Expensive Toys

(2)

A Personal Bonding With Parents

& Others

(3)

• Teens are Looking for Meaningful and Intimate Relationships

A Sense of Belonging

(1)

• The Family and Church Should Become the Communal Support Group

• Otherwise, They Would Succumb to Peer Group Pressure

THE PARENTING OF TEENS

• The Most Practical Advice from Scripture:

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Don’t Exasperate or Embitter Your Children [Ephesians 6:4]

Low Control

Low Support

Permissive Parent

Authoritative Parent

Neglectful Parent

AuthoritarianParent

High Support

High Control

• The 4 Styles [Adapted from DL Thomas and AJ Weigert]

• Wrong Parenting Styles can Lead to Serious Consequences

A TEENAGER’S PERSPECTIVE ON PARENTING

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Can I Get My Own Way?

Am I Loved?

Spoilt Stable

Anti-SocialGuilt &

Rebellion

Can I Get My Own Way?

Am I Loved?

CONCLUSION

1. Psychological and Spiritual Maturity is a Journey

2. A Mutual Understanding is Essential in Parenting Teenagers

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