5 Ways to Become an Optimist

8/8/2019 5 Ways to Become an Optimist

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5 Ways to Become an Optimist

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By Deborah Kotz, USNews.com

With cherry blossoms blooming, baseball season starting, and the stock market hovering near 11,000, it's impossible not to fe el a little

extra spring in your step. Heck, even our President is beaming with the passage of health reform and hints of job growt h. So, perhaps

this is as good a time as any to revel in optimism or, at least, nurture positive -thinking if you're a glass-half-empty kind of person.

Need more convincing? A recent study published in Psychological Science found that those with more optim istic attitudes had better-

functioning immune systems which, in turn, helped them ward off illnesses. Yet far too many of us assume that optimism is an inborn

trait bestowed on a lucky few. That's a completely wrong assumption, says James Maddux, a profess or of psychology at George Mason

University. Can people learn to be optimists? "The answer is an indisputable yes," says Maddux. He recommends the following:

1. Ref r ame those "disasters." After recently witnessing a round of layoffs at my office, I felt pa nicked that I'd soon be facing the loss of

my own "dream job." Maddux tells me I need to disabuse myself of the notion that there's only one job for me. "You may think that if you

lose your job you may never find another that's as fulfilling, but that's pr obably not the case," he says. While I shouldn't deny that my

current position might not last forever, I also need to acknowledge that there will probably be other professional opportunit ies that, after

a period of adjustment, could potentially be as chall enging and satisfying, he says.

2. Take contr ol. Pessimists tend to think bad things happen to them because they simply have bad luck or because they don't have

what it takes to be successful, says Maddux, when a bad economy or an unfaithful partner could really be the reason for getting laid off

or dumped. Maddux recommends aiming for a balance between accepting responsibility for some of the bad circumstances and taki ng

action (i.e., looking for another job or posting an ad on a dating site). Allow yourse lf to acknowledge those things that were beyond your

control.

3. Pay attention to what makes you f eel optimistic. Do you feel more positive when the collective mood is positive? The flowers are

bright, the neighbors look happy, the dog's tail is wagging. " Try to really tune in to what you're thinking and feeling in the moment,"

suggests Maddux. "If you're feeling good, try to understand what brought you there and how to get there again." You can also try to

bank those positive feelings to draw on when you'r e feeling the darkness creep in-like in the dead of winter when you're shoveling your



fifth round of snow. "Remind yourself that winter is transient, that in just a short amount of time the flowers will be bloom ing," says

Maddux.

4. Strive for real conversations. While making small talk is good for fostering social connections, having substantive interactions

actually gives people a greater sense of well being, according to a March study from the University of Arizona. Sure, there m ay not be

time each morning to have deep philosophical conversations with the guy who swipes your security badge, but reaching out to a close

friend or spouse can go a long way towards fostering optimism. As Maddux points out, married couples headed for divorce often find

themselves able to talk about only trivial things like TV shows or a termite problem. "The goal of couple's therapy is not just to ge t

people talking again but talking about things that really matter."

5. Do look at that glass as half f ull. Cultivating optimism is about breaking old thought patterns and establishing new ones, says

Maddux. If you're truly looking at a glass that's filled to the halfway mark, why not see it as half full? Choosing to focus on those "half-

full" things might help you to realize that you don't need your cup to runneth over in order to feel optimistic.

There's a movement afoot²at least among those who practice what's known as"integrative medicine"²to focus on maintaining a state of optimal health rather thansimply alleviating symptoms or treating a particular disease. These docs, nurses, andother health practitioners want us to be truly mindful of how we choose to nourish

ourselves with food, activity, rest, and connections with others. In other words, what arewe doing to keep from getting sick in the first place? That's the question we need to askourselves every day, moment to moment, contends psychologist Jon Kabat-Zinn,

founding director of the University of Massachusetts Medical School's Center forMindfulness in Medicine.

Studies have shown that mindfulness, a form of meditation in which you disengage

yourself from strong beliefs, thoughts, and emotions, has a positive effect on brain

function, lowering the stress response and increasing feelings of relaxation and well -being. It involves being truly present, even during those simple, mundane activities likewashing dishes. It can remind you of the "reality of impermanence," Kabat-Zinn writes inhis bestselling book Full Catastrophe Living. "Here you are doing the dishes again. How

many times have you done the dishes? How many more times will you do them in your

life? What is this activity we call doing the dishes? Who is doing them? Why?"

At last week's Institute of Medicine conference on integrative health, he outlined fivestrategies for using mindfulness to improve one's health and achieve wellness.

1. Consider what's right with you. "Until you stop breathing, there's more right withyou than wrong with you," says Kabat-Zinn. Every day, take a moment to thank youreyes for seeing, your liver for functioning, your feet for carrying you from place to place.

Heck, thank those mitochondria within your cells for pumping out the energy you needto get you out of bed in the morning.

2. Love yourself unconditionally. Hate yourself for being 40 pounds overweight?Those berating thoughts you have about your imperfections can actually derail you

instead of motivating you into action. (It's that old story: Starve yourself as punishmentfor overeating, until you can't take it anymore and give in to a binge.) Rather thansetting a weight-loss goal and promising to love yourself once you get there, Kabat-Zinn

says you need to make an effort to love yourself "all the way," whether you're 300



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5 Ways to Become an Optimist