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7/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
1/8
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
Inaugural IssueWELCOME TO THE FIRST ISSUE OF IBC STUDENT MINISTRYSPLUGGED IN NEWSLETTER FOR PARENTS. THIS NEWSLETTER IS A
MONTHLY PUBLICATION TO BETTER HELP YOU PLUG IN TO THESPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT OF YOUR STUDENT. AFTER ALL,
SCRIPTURE TEACHES THAT PARENTS ARE THE PRIMARY DISCIPLERSOF THEIR CHILDREN. EACH ISSUE WILL INCLUDE THINGS/EVENTS TO
EXPECT THAT MONTH AND UPCOMING MONTHS, AN ADULTVOLUNTEER SPOTLIGHT TO INTRODUCE YOU TO WHO SERVES,
VALUABLE ARTICLES AND OTHER RESOURCES TO HELP YOU WITHYOUR TASK OF MAKING MULTIPLYING DISCIPLES THROUGH YOUR
FAMILY, AND RECENT STORIES OF STUDENTS ENGAGING THEIRFAMILIES...THEIR PEERS...THEIR WORLD...WITH THE GOSPEL.
July Issue
THIS MONTH HS BIBLE STUDY (TUESDAYS)
MS BIBLE STUDY (WEDNESDAYS)
TORONTO GO TRIP
MS CAMP
VBS
COMING SOON
YOUTH EVANGELISMCONFERENCE (8/9-10)
CHURCH-WIDE DISCIPLESHIPCONFERENCE (8/24)
VOLUNTEERSPOTLIGHT
GINGER WADE
ENGAGEONE WEEK, LASTINGIMPACT
EQUIPYOU SAY YES, I SAY NO--HOW PARENTING STYLEMAY AFFECT TEENBEHAVIOR
EMPOWERDISCOVER YOUR FAMILYSRHYTHM
A MONTHLY PUBLICATION TO HELP PARENTS BETTER PLUG IN TO THE
SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT OF THEIR STUDENT
http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/7/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
2/8
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
STUDENT MINISTRY STAFF
Matt Hubbard
ead Student Pastor
Melissa Sponer
Girls Ministry Associate
Ross Spigner
Middle School Pastor
Amanda Bea
Ministry Assistant
A publ ication of IBC Student Mini str y.www.ibcl rstudents.org 2013
Though you have not seen him.
Though you do not now see him,
you believe in him and rejoice withjoy that is inexpressible and filled
with glory. 1 Peter 1:8
d when they could not find them,
y dragged Jason and some of the
others before the city authorities,
outing, These men who have turned
ir world upside down have come
e also...saying there is another king,
sus. Acts 17:6-7
Brothers, I do not consider tha
made it my own. But one thin
forgetting what lies behind and
forward to what lies ahead, I p
toward the goal for the prize
upward call of God in Christ Jes Philippians 3:13-14
For by grace you have been saved through
faith. And this is not your own doing; it isthe gift of God, not a result of works, sothat no one may boast. For we are hisworkmanship, created in Christ Jesus forgood works, which God preparedbeforehand that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:8-10
ReThink
http://www.amazon.com/books/dp/1931548692http://www.amazon.com/books/dp/1931548692http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/7/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
3/8
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
VOLUNTEER SPOTLIGHTGINGER WADEMY FAMILY: STEVE (HUSBAND...MARRIED 26 YEARS)
EA (DAUGHTER...24...MARRIED TO JAMES)JIM (SON...21)
DUKE (THE LARGE CAT)
WHERE I SERVE: 9TH GRADE SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER, HIGH SCHOOL GIRLSDGROUP LEADER. I ALSO TEACH IN THE HEAVEN ROOM IN 4THGRADE VBS EVERY SUMMER. I TEACH PART-TIME AT LITTLE ROCKCHRISTIAN. I TEACH 7TH GRADERS SO I GET TO TEACH SOME OFMY LRCA STUDENTS AGAIN AS 9TH GRADERS.
HAVE SERVED FOR: 7 YEARS.MY DREAM VACATION DESTINATION IS: ANYWHERE I CAN VACATION WITH MY FAMILY. NOW THAT BOTH
KIDS ARE OUT OF THE NEST, THOSE RARE OCCASIONS WHEN WEARE ALL TOGETHER ARE SWEET BLESSINGS.
MY FAVORITE SNACK FOOD IS: I LOVE PEANUT M&MS.MY FAVORITE BIBLE STORY IS: IN LUKE 10, JESUS VISITS MARY AND MARTHA. MARY IS IN AWE OF
HER SAVIOR! SHE FALLS AT HIS FEET. SHE JUST WANTS TO BE INHIS PRESENCE. MARTHA IS SO BUSY SERVING JESUS THAT SHEPASSES UP A CHANCE TO BE IN HIS PRESENCE. THERE IS MUCH TOLEARN FROM EACH OF THESE LADIES! I ALSO LOVE THE PARABLEOF THE PERSISTENT WIDOW IN LUKE 18. I BELIEVE IN PERSISTENTPRAYER.
MOST PEOPLE DONT KNOW THIS ABOUT ME: MOST PEOPLE DONT KNOW THAT IM AN INTROVERT.
ONTHEWEB
CENTERFORPAREN
TANDYOUTHUNDERS
TANDING
HOMEWORDMIN
ISTRIES
INPRINT
PARENTINGWITHK
INGDOMPURPOSEby
DR.RichardRoss
RealWorldParen
tsbyMarkMatlock
DOHARDTHINGSbyA
lexandBrettHar
ris
http://www.amazon.com/Do-Hard-Things-Rebellion-Expectations/dp/1601421125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372693362&sr=1-1&keywords=do+hard+thingshttp://www.amazon.com/Do-Hard-Things-Rebellion-Expectations/dp/1601421125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372693362&sr=1-1&keywords=do+hard+thingshttp://www.amazon.com/Do-Hard-Things-Rebellion-Expectations/dp/1601421125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372693362&sr=1-1&keywords=do+hard+thingshttp://www.amazon.com/Do-Hard-Things-Rebellion-Expectations/dp/1601421125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372693362&sr=1-1&keywords=do+hard+thingshttp://www.amazon.com/Do-Hard-Things-Rebellion-Expectations/dp/1601421125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372693362&sr=1-1&keywords=do+hard+thingshttp://www.amazon.com/Do-Hard-Things-Rebellion-Expectations/dp/1601421125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372693362&sr=1-1&keywords=do+hard+thingshttp://www.amazon.com/Do-Hard-Things-Rebellion-Expectations/dp/1601421125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372693362&sr=1-1&keywords=do+hard+thingshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Real-World-Parents-Christian-Parenting/dp/0310669367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693333&sr=8-1&keywords=real+world+parentshttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Kingdom-Purpose-Kenneth-Hemphill/dp/080543299X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372693205&sr=8-1&keywords=parenting+with+kingdom+purposehttp://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.homeword.com/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.cpyu.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/7/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
4/8
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
1 2
HS Bible Study
Shuffield Home
(6-8 PM)
3 4 5 6
8 9
HS Bible Study
Hamby Home
(6-8 PM)
10
MS Bible Study
The Spot
(5:45-7:15 PM)
11 12 13
Toronto GO Trip
Commissioning
Toronto Training
Cafe, 4:00 PM
15 VBS 16
VBS
HS Bible Study
Hubbard Home
(6-8 PM)
17
VBS
Joint Worship
The Spot
(5:45-7:15 PM)
18 VBS 19 VBS 20 Toronto GO
Toronto GO Trip 22Toronto GO Trip
MS Camp23
Toronto GO Trip
MS Camp24
Toronto GO Trip
MS Camp25
Toronto GO Trip
MS Camp26
Toronto GO Trip
MS Camp27
29 30
HS Bible Study
Geurin Home
(6-8 PM)
31
MS Bible Study
The Spot
(5:45-7:15 PM)
2013 /July
AUGUST 8-9 STATEWIDE YOUTH EVANGELISM CONFERENCE (@IBC)AUGUST 13 CHURCHWIDE SUNDAY SCHOOL LEADERSHIP DINNERAUGUST 18 PROMOTION SUNDAYAUGUST 21 WEDNESDAY NIGHT PROGRAMMING BEGINS
AUGUST 24 DISCIPLESHIP CONFERENCE
http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/7/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
5/8
ENGAGE
ONE WEEK, LASTING IMPACTA Story from Middle School GO Trip
to Mission Arlington.
Often times it is hard to grasp whatkind of an impact our middle schoolerscan make on a 5 day mission trip in anout of state city. There is a tendencyto wonder if the impact will last, if therelationships and love expressed to thekids will be remembered. One storyfrom this trip confirmed to me that Godis able to make a lasting impactthrough our students, even over theshort course of 5 days.
On the first afternoon of our trip, one ofour VBS groups went to an apartmentcomplex called Chula Vista.As wearrived several students recognizedthis place and quickly realized that thiswas a ministry site from last years trip.The majority of the kids spoke Spanishand the only place to gather was nearthe entry road under the lone tree oncampus. Needless to say, theconditions for a VBS type of ministryseemed difficult.
The tree offered limited shade, theconversations hard to establish, andthe opportunity to play with the kidswas constantly interrupted by a carneeding to pass through. However,none of these difficulties seemed toalter the apartment kids excitement tobe with us nor our studentswillingness to show the love of Christ.
As kids arrived and as we limped ourway through the first 30 minutes with
awkward conversations andinterrupted play, we began our VBSscheduled activities. Several studentsconfidently shared their testimony,another courageously told a Biblestory. We transitioned to some songsand then we began our craft. Thatdays craft was a picture frame. Thekids were allowed to decorate theirown and on the inside of the frame
was our weekly Bible verse. One kid inparticular, when seeing the pictureframe, excitedly jumped up to ask if hecould go home only to come back realquick. He did not tell us why, but itwas as if he had a surprise to show us.
Alex ran home and returned with apicture frame craft that he made lastyear when our students had come toChula Vista. He proudly displayed hispicture frame that was in nearly mintlike condition. After displaying it tous, he ran home a second time toreturn again with a second craft fromlast year. It too was in excellentcondition as if it had been kept in asafe place. Both of these items overthe course of last year had become
valuable keepsakes for Alex. Thereason certainly was not because ofthe price value of the craft supplies,but because they were reminders tohim of Gods love and the people wholoved him enough to come and tell himabout Jesus.
Seeing Alexs excitement andenthusiasm about the craft clued me inon how God is able to make a lastingimpact on lives even when there is alimited amount of time available to do
so. I am thankful our middle schoolersseized the opportunity to share thelove of Christ and I am overjoyed toreflect on how God is using our middleschoolers to impact kids like Alex.
Thanks for sending our students!
By Ross Spigner, Middle School Pastor
EQUIP
(NOTE: IBC Student Ministry does notnecessarily endorse the content andviewpoints expressed in these articles.Theyare posted here for purposes of keeping yoinformed as to what is happening in the wo
of youth culture.)
YOU SAY YES, I SAY NO--
HOW PARENTING STYLE MAY
AFFECT TEENS BEHAVIORShttp://www.philly.com/philly/blogshealthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC99
As Groucho Marx once said, Gettingolder is no problem. You just have tolive long enough.
If only getting older were so simple.For some teens and their families, theteenage years are filled with stress anturmoil. And why wouldnt they be?
After all, the child is becoming anadult, moving from dependence onparents to independence and greaterself-reliance. This transition mayinvolve indecision, anxiety, conflict an
rebelliousness. If you are a parent of teenager living through theseexperiences, hopefully you will findcomfort in knowing that you are notalone.
In early adolescence, they may
argue with you. Teens begin toanalyze the world around them andcompare their values with thosecommunicated by friends and themedia. As a result, they may argue wtheir parents and challenge their
authority. The same child who idolizehis or her parents just a short time agnow thinks of them as ordinary humabeings, capable of making mistakes.
You are educated when you have theability to listen to almost anythingwithout losing your temper or self-confidence. - Robert Frost
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.99http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/healthy_kids/You-say-yesI-say-no-how-parenting-style-may-affect-teens-behaviors-.html#BIhSom7Kr233BLTC.997/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
6/8
In middle adolescence, they may
ignore you. During this period yourteens are more likely to ignore youthan to disobey you. They spend moretime with friends and away from home.To be like their peers, they may
experiment with drugs and sex.
Even as kids reach adolescence, theyneed more than ever for us to watchover them. Adolescence is not aboutletting go. Its about hanging on duringa very bumpy ride. - Ron Taffel, Ph.D.
In late adolescence, they may
actually tolerate you! During thisphase, teens may start thinking moreseriously about their future careers andrelationships. They may become more
tolerant of their parents, and actuallyreturn to many of their parents valuesand views.
As a man, I've been representative ofthe values I hold dear. And the values Ihold dear are carryovers from the livesof my parents. - Sidney Poitier
How can we help children grow up tobecome independent and
responsible adults? Take a look atyour style of parenting as it may play
an important role.
If you are an authoritative (balanced)parent you may...
Focus more on guiding thancontrolling behavior
Set firm rules that are realistic foryour childs age and abilities
Explain the reasons for rules
Allow for some give and take
Forgive and teach more often thanpunish
Children of authoritative parents willlikely grow up to become assertive,responsible, independent andcooperative.
Or is your parenting style
authoritarian (strict)? You may tend
to...
Be controlling and demanding
Set rigid rules, which may be
unrealistic for your childs age andabilities
Not explain the reasons for rules(Because I say so)
Expect 100% obedience
Punish your child for not meetingexpectations
Children of authoritarian parents maynot develop the ability to makedecisions independently.
Perhaps you are a permissive parent
who tends to...
Not be demanding
Set few rules Rarely correct yourchild
Act more like your childs friendthan a parent
Children of permissive parents oftengrow up feeling that their parents dontcare.
More evidence that parenting style
seems to make a difference:researchers at Brigham YoungUniversity found a link betweenparenting style and teen binge-drinking. http://news.byu.edu/archive10-jun-parentingstyle.asp Theysurveyed 5,000 adolescents abouttheir drinking habits and theirrelationships with their parents.
Teens with authoritative (balanced)parents were least likely to be bingedrinkers.
Teens with authoritarian (strict)parents were more than twice aslikely to be binge drinkers
Teens with permissive parents werenearly three times as likely to bebinge drinkers.
Parenting is not easy- especiallywhen living through the process ofadolescent development with yourteenager. If your parenting style isauthoritative (not authoritarian orpermissive), odds are that your
teenager, who argued with you andignored you just a short time ago, wilturn out just fine.
When I was a boy of 14, my fatherwas so ignorant I could hardly stand have the old man around. But when Igot to be 21, I was astonished at howmuch the old man had learned inseven years. - Mark Twain
By Rima Himelstein, M.D.Crozer-Keystone Health System
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
WHEN I WAS A BOY OF 14,MY FATHER WAS SOIGNORANT I COULD HARDLYSTAND TO HAVE THE OLDMAN AROUND. BUT WHEN IGOT TO BE 21, I WASASTONISHED AT HOW MUCHTHE OLD MAN HAD LEARNEDIN SEVEN YEARS. MARK TWAIN
http://news.byu.edu/archive10-jun-parentingstyle.asphttp://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://news.byu.edu/archive10-jun-parentingstyle.asphttp://news.byu.edu/archive10-jun-parentingstyle.asphttp://news.byu.edu/archive10-jun-parentingstyle.asphttp://news.byu.edu/archive10-jun-parentingstyle.asp7/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
7/8
EMPOWER
DISCOVER YOUR FAMILYS RHYTHMHTTP://WWW.ORANGEPARENTS.ORG/DISCOVER-YOUR-FAMILYS-RHYTHM/
A couple once shared with me that they had no balance intheir lives. Their home seemed like a battlefield filled withdaily conflicts. Their children were frustrated and discontentmost of the time. As a husband and wife, they felt like theycouldnt find margin in their lives to do the things necessaryto make their marriage and home life better. Frustrated andin tears, they said they couldnt find peace in the midst ofthe chaos, and they were about to give up.
After a little more discussion, I asked them if they had anysort of routine in their daily or weekly schedule. The wiferesponded to me quickly that she had grown up in a very
structured home, and now she absolutely did not believe insticking to any type of schedule. Many couples run fromroutines and schedules because of a bad experiencegrowing up in environments where they were rigidlyenforced. The truth is, a routine or schedule is not a badthing. But like most things, if not done with moderation, aroutine or schedule can be a nightmare on children and theirparents.
In the book Parenting Beyond Your Capacity, ReggieJoiner unpacks the concept of every family developing theirown rhythm. While routine and structure might be built ona clock or sequence, a rhythm is based upon the uniquedynamics and flow of each individual family. All too often,families try to adopt a schedule based on something theyveread. But taking a standard approach and applying it to aspecific family can be difficult. Every family has its own
unique qualities and will need a certain type of flow that fitsthem specifically, so this approach can feel like putting asquare peg in a round hole.
After a while, we find ourselves following a specific routinethat doesnt make sense to us because it was written in a
parenting book that could never take into consideration ouunique situation. Peace in the home happens when a familunderstands a certain set of principles and then createstheir own rhythm based on these principles. This approachensures parents and children know what to expect each daand week, creating harmony in the home.
Once I explained this strategy to this particular couple, thedeveloped a calendar for their home based upon theircurrent schedule. They eliminated some events that werebreaking the family apart with stress and tension. At the
same time, they had room to add some things that wouldbring their family together, like game night and pancakebreakfasts.
This schedule soon created an amazing rhythm they wereexcited about. In the weeks to come, they found conflictsbegan to lessen and their enjoyment grew as they finallyfound some type of balance in their lives.
Life in todays world can get messy.
If you are struggling in the day to day, try working on yourcalendar and create a rhythm that works specifically for yoIt doesnt take much to have peace.
By Terry Scalzitti is Associate Pastor for Adult and FamilyMinistries at First Baptist Fort Lauderdale.
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
IF YOU DONT HAVE TIME TO DO IT RIGHT, WHEN
WILL YOU HAVE TIME TO DO IT OVER?
COACH JOHN WOODEN
http://www.orangeparents.org/discover-your-familys-rhythm/http://www.orangeparents.org/discover-your-familys-rhythm/http://www.orangeparents.org/discover-your-familys-rhythm/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.ibclrstudents.org/http://www.orangeparents.org/discover-your-familys-rhythm/http://www.orangeparents.org/discover-your-familys-rhythm/http://www.orangeparents.org/discover-your-familys-rhythm/http://www.orangeparents.org/discover-your-familys-rhythm/7/28/2019 Plugged In Parents Newsletter (July 2013)
8/8
A publication of IBC Student Ministry.
www.ibclrstudents.org 2013
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