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How to Perfect Your Dating Profile Pictures Greg Aronoff | Dateafied
Can the pictures on your dating profile guarantee you success? Hard to say. But the opposite is definitely true. Having the wrong pictures can guarantee that you will NOT pass Go and will not collect $200 dollars (are Monopoly references still relevant?). In an ideal world, your written profile and who you are deep down would be all that’s needed to attract the right girl. But alas, that’s not the case.
Research from OkCupid said that photos (and not the profile itself) accounted for over 90% of a profile’s popularity. That’s not to say you have to be a Men’s Health cover guy (girls are much less superficial when it comes to looks), but you do have to show yourself in the best light possible. And since less people will actually read every word in your profile, you should spend as much time (or more) perfecting your photos. So, here are 8 tips on how to perfect your dating profile pictures...
#1. Shirtless Selfie = Still Single
Don’t be that guy. According to a Zoosk survey, guys who had posted selfies received almost 10% less messages. The shirtless selfie is akin to snapchatting a picture of your junk. They’re both narcissistic, creepy, and will never get the reaction you’re expecting. Especially avoid the shirtless selfie if you’re wondering how to get a girlfriend. You’ll never hear a mother of three talk about how she saw their father’s glistening chest and knew he was her soulmate. Your Move: Simply have a friend take your picture the next time you’re out somewhere interesting. With your shirt on. The caveat being if you’re on the beach. Then simply don’t take your picture.
#2. Showcase Your Entourage
As George Bailey taught us, no man is a failure who has friends. This is also true with your dating profile. SOCIAL PROOF Having a picture of you and your buds (or lady buds see below) is a great way to maximize your “social proof”. Social proof is a theory that states when we’re unsure of something, we look to others and see how they’re acting. So if you have a photo of you and your crew having a great time, it shows: a.) you’re liked and accepted (and not a weird creeper) b.) you know how to have fun and be social with others In fact, according to a study from UC San Diego, profiles were rated as more attractive when in group photos compared to going solo. HIGH STATUS Important note just make sure you’re in the middle of said group photo. Preferably touching someone. Being in the middle gives you a sense of importance and social status. And studies show that if you’re touching another
person, you have higher social status. Just don’t be weird with the touching. DECOY EFFECT Group photos are also beneficial if: a.) you happen to be a good looking man, or b.) you have a friend who’s similar looking to you (similar coloring, body type, facial features), but slightly less attractive. In Dan Ariely’s Predictably Irrational book, he talks about how we humans prefer context to help us make decisions. At MIT, he gave his students pictures of George Clooney, an altered and slightlyless attractive George Clooney, and Brad Pitt. About 3 out of 4 people choose the regular George Clooney (he also performed the study with non Ocean’s 11 faces and saw the same results of the decoy effect). Ariely explains “Because the folks you want to attract will have a hard time evaluating you with no comparables around. However, if you are compared with a "you," the decoy friend will do a lot to make you look better, not just in comparison with the decoy but also in general, and in comparison with all the other people around.” CHEERLEADER EFFECT
Research is showing that faces are more attractive when they’re part of a group then when they’re alone. This is called the ‘cheerleader effect’. People rate a composite of faces as more attractive than the solo faces by themselves. So when you’re in a group, you can take advantage of that compositing and group average, and your overall attractiveness is increased. Your Move: The next time you’re out doing something fun (preferably outdoorsy) ask a stranger to take a group photo of you and your buds (with you directly in the middle). Picking a cute stranger has the added bonus of a built in conversation starter. Once you have your photo, quickly edit it with something like Pixlr and just add a little arrow or sign to show you’re the one they’re looking for. Literally.
#3. Wingwomen.
Another way to utilize social proof is to show you’re liked by women too. Not really a newsflash, but a study out of the University of Texas at Austin shows that “women rated men more desirable when surrounded by women than when shown alone or with other men.” However, with wingwomen you run the (high) risk of potential dates getting the wrong impression about you and said lady friend(s).
Your Move: If you do include pictures of lady friends, be proactive and clearly explain your platonic status either in the caption or in the photo itself. And to be clear, you should only use pictures of friends & family. If it’s a picture of an exwife or girlfriend, your skeevy meter just went full tilt.
#4. Harness the Power of Puppies & Babies
Nothing in the world is cuter than babies and puppies, except maybe a baby riding a puppy.
DOGGONE LOYAL Dogs are associated with loyalty, kindness and companionship, and people tend to transfer those same characteristics to the dog owners as well. According to “Dognition” and “The Genius of Dogs” (excellently summarized in this Slate article), dogs can be so helpful to your social life that “having a dog with you is more important for first impressions than what you wear.” In one example, there was a Frenchman who approached 240 women and asked for their phone number. Here’s how he did:
● Without a dog 1 out of 10 gave him their number. ● With a dog 1 out of 3 gave him his number.
So, if possible, be sure to include a photo of you and your furry friend (not to be confused with a friend who’s a furry). BABY BUDDY According to another French study, babies can help your game even more than dogs can. In one study, men who were shown smiling and playing with a baby were 3x as likely to get a girl’s number compared to the men who ignored the babies. Your Move: Borrow a dog or baby (from someone you know. Don’t make this weird) for a quick profile shot. In the study,
the guys who played with the babies were rated as more attractive in photos. Just be clear and point out that’s not actually your baby and a cute story of why you have a photo of you with someone else’s baby.
#5. Be Interesting
In a sense, you should get your Walter Mitty on. By capturing yourself doing interesting things, you will by default, become interesting. CAPTAIN CAVEMAN In a study conducted by the University of Alaska Anchorage, they helped answer, how to impress a girl. The found that men were rated more attractive if they were pictured doing risky
cavemanish activities like “handling fire and dangerous animals”. The researchers theorize that the oldschool risky behavior was rated more attractive because it showcased their primal sexual selection potential. Your Move: To show off your caveman skillz (with a z for being ‘extreme’), do anything our huntergather ancestors would have considered brave/risky like riding a bull (or running with them), or “going outside in storms, swimming in moving waters, jumping over fires and from risky heights, racing down steep slopes.” If that doesn’t sound like you at all just go outside. Men are rated as more attractive and nearly 20% more likely to secure a date if their profile picture was taken outside.
#6. Prime Your Profile
Priming is a marketing concept that you can incorporate into your profile to boost your success. It’s basically a way to have positive impressions cast your way. GUITAR HERO Similar to the efficacy of dogs, a study found that a man simply holding a guitar was more than 3x as likely to get a girl’s number than he was when just carrying a sports bag. The halo effect could be the explanation. Since most guitarists are considered cool (and generally sought after), those feelings could be transferred over to you simply by holding the guitar. Another explanation could be that musical ability might also signal higher intelligence and good genes—two qualities important to women when choosing a partner. INCORPORATE SOME IRISES As Buzzfeed might say, having this one simple thing can make you more attractive. What is the one thing? … Flowers. Research shows that you can be judged more attractive simply by having a few flowers in the background of your picture(s). In one study, women watched videos of men in either a room
with flowers or without, and they judged the men as sexier/more attractive when they were in the room with flowers. Flowers are associated with romance, which she might unconsciously transfer those feelings to you. Your Move: Buy some flowers and borrow a guitar. Then simply place both in the background of your photo(s). Better still, pick up a cheap guitar and actually learn to play it.
#7 Look Your Best
Your pictures are doing a lot of heavy lifting, and you need to have them working for you, and, well, not punching you in the face. DITCH THE SHADES If you’re shopping online for a new product, would you ever buy an item that didn't have a clear picture? Unless you're that person who sees an unattended mysterious drink at a party and wants to see what it tastes like. The point is you can be mysterious in some ways, but not in your photos. You need to own your look. Even if you think you look better in sunglasses, you're inadvertently coming across as shady and/or not genuine. Remember, women are more attracted to masculinity and confidence. STUBBLE FOR THE WIN Yep, ditch the razor. For about 10 days or so. Researchers in an Australian study showed women four different versions of the same men:
● Cleanshaven ● Five days of light stubble ● 10 days of heavy stubble ● Fullon man beard.
The 10 day heavy stubble was the clear winner. The heavy stubble was a mix between the too masculine (read aggressive) full beard, and the not mature/masculine enough clean shaven look. SMILE As the saying goes, "smile and the world smiles with you". It's been proven that smiling makes you appear:
● More attractive ● More sincere and competent ● More friendly
According to YouBeauty Psychology Advisor Art Markman, Ph.D. “People who smile are often friendlier, have a better sense of humor and are more socially engaging.” And our brains come wired with 'mirror neurons', which as the name suggests, helps us feel what other people are feeling. So if we see someone smiling, we're likely to smile and experience that good mood as well. In studies, subjects judge smiling faces as more attractive—the “reward regions” of the brain even light up in response to a grin. TAKE UP SPACE
Your pictures are communicating a ton of nonverbal (obviously) facts about you. Some aspects like confidence can be interpreted by your body language. So, if your arms are crossed and you're holding your body tight that communicates something totally different than when your arms and legs are spread out wide and you're physically taking up more space. And research shows that when you do take up more space, you're rated as more attractive. Your Move: For your one or two close ups (read below for the types of photos you need), grow some stubble and then task your friends to get a candid shot during your adventure out.
#8 Stand Out By Being Normal
3 TO 5 No more, no less. Having three to five photos is the sweet spot. Any more and you can be thought of as full of yourself. Like, 'look at all of these photos of how awesome I am!' But less than three and it appears that you’re not confident enough or you're hiding something. And it's simply hard to get a sense of what you actually look like. Here’s (roughly) how your profile should be broken down:
● 12 closeups ● 12 mid range (headtotoe) ● 1 that’s less about you and more about the thing/place you’re at
You don’t need to have a professional headshot (having a 90’s mall style ‘Glamour’ shot might be funny/unique though), but you do need at least two pictures where you’re front and center. And preferably from different angles, to show what you actually look like and not just your good side. If you’re outdoorsy or extreme (then kudos, you have Rule 5 handled like a boss) that’s great, but you can’t be far in the background of every one.
Your potential date should be able to pick you out of a lineup. Theoretically. Don’t actually force her to pick you out of a lineup. And be sure to mix it up. You don't need 10 closeups from the same angle, smiling the same way. That's just weird. KEEP IT CURRENT Don’t be that guy. Don’t use old photos and try and pass them off as how you still look. And if you’re out of high school/college and still wearing your letterman jacket just stop. Your profile pics aren’t a photo album to show how you looked when you were younger/thinner. If you’re thinking that first you’ll score the date based on an old picture, then you'll win her over with your charm and personality... you won’t. They’ll feel betrayed/annoyed and you’ll come across as a liar that can't be trusted. Your Move: Update your pics. At least one or two are probably older than a year. If you’ve put on a few pounds, this will motivate you to get back to your fighting weight. And it will also push you to go out and have adventures that you can then post to your profile.
And limiting your pics to five max will give you something new and interesting to share about yourself. SAME SAME According to Robert Cialdini, who wrote the great book Influence, 'we like people who like us' just as much as 'we like people who are like us'. (Remember when the word 'like' was a filler word in the 80's? No? Maybe that was just like a Phoenix thing) Cialdini shows how we are more positive towards people who dress like us, have a similar/same name and have the same background and interests. Your Move: If you browse your preferred online dating site and happen to find the one person you really want to attract, well in a non Single White Female kinda way you can tailor your pictures to match theirs. Of course the best way to stand out is to be yourself, so you don't want to be deceitful or inauthentic because you'll be found out anyway. But rather, if you really do have the same interests and background in common, then you can give yourself a little boost by mirroring her pictures (in a nonobvious, noncreepy way)
Conclusion There you have it. Hopefully these eight tips will help you meet person of your dreams! If you enjoyed this content, please share it on your Facebook page or by hitting one of the social buttons below. If you'd like to improve your dating profile description and attract women by verifying your actual background, check out how to get Date Certified and date more often.
