Why Tampa is great and DC is a suckmuppet

A professional presentation

Lizards!

Beaches!

Mermaids!

Lizards, EVERYWHERE.

- Wild Dolphin Adventure Cruise - Backstage Pass Adventure to PENGUINS - Full service bar - 500,000 gallon tank - Literally swim with the fishes - Dive with the sharks. -Summer Aquacamp Travel Instructor job

opening (Katie)

Florida Aquarium

- Seminole Hard Rock Café and Casino - Tampa Bay Downs (thoroughbred race track) - Tampa Improv Comedy Theatre and Restaurant - Muvico Centro YBOR

- Centro YBOR, in historic Ybor City, Where Entertainment Happens! Featuring the 20-screen Muvico Theater, The Tampa Improv, and GameTime Entertainment Center. The Center has 10 restaurants/bars with a wide range of offerings from fine dining to a brew pub, all available while shopping at an exciting mix of retail stores.

Entertainments and such

“AQUA Bar and Grille's fresh colors reflect the vibrancy of the cool ocean waters. Experience an environment designed to entertain your every sense, highlighted by a water encased walk-in wine cellar and a state of the art open kitchen. AQUA Bar and Grille attains a new standard of culinary excellence.”

“Nightlife” (Also applicable for Daydrinking)

Blue Martini - Blue Martini features live entertainment Monday - Saturday and happy hour Monday- Friday 4 -7 p.m. Blue Martini is Tampa's premier, upscale martini lounge, featuring more than 30 specialty martinis.

Cigar City Brewing LLC produces small batches of hand-crafted, artisanal ales and lagers in a variety of classic styles for wholesale and retail distribution. A focus on local ingredients and culture is the cornerstone around which our award-winning recipes are constructed.

CineBistro offers guests 21 years of age and older a luxurious movie and dining experience. First run and independent films, a chef created menu, extensive wine list and full bar are provided for our guests in a warm and friendly environment.

Club Prana is located in the heart of Ybor City and is Tampa's only five story night club and upscale entertainment venue. Each floor has its own style and music format. Five levels, five parties, with a rooftop skybar playing live reggae. 

Gaspar’s Grotto - World famous event venue, pirate bar and restaurant. Serving great Cuban influenced food and drink. Live entertainment. A truly indigenous Tampa experience not to be missed. In the very heart of Tampa's historic district, Ybor City

More places to get irresponsibly drunk

 Hattricks: A downtown Irish hockey neighborhood tavern with great food and fine spirits.

Howl at the Moon: Dueling pianos and laugh-out-loud crowd interaction. The most fun you can have with your clothes on.

Hula Bay Club: A Tampa treasure, tucked away on Tampa Bay! Enjoy the wide open waterfront views, an enticing island-meets mainland inspired menu and inexpensive prices for fresh seafood and sushi to slow-roasted pork.

MacDinton’s : Irish pub and restaurant with delicious food and friendly Irish staff. Happy hour (2 for 1) 11:30am-7pm every day but Friday. Friday 6pm-8pm, $10 ALL YOU CAN DRINK. Patio, big screen TV, darts, pool, golf, ample parking and specials every night.

The Sail Pavillion: Located on Tampa's Riverwalk, The Sail Pavilion is Tampa's only 360 degree open air waterfront bar. This urban oasis offers a full liquor bar, beer, wine and snacks. Come on foot, by car or even by boat.

These fucking things!(Street cars)

- Bok Tower Gardens Experience one of America's finest gardens and nature

preserve surrounding a 205-foot sculpted marble carillon tower with daily concerts and Mediterranean style mansion. National Historic Landmark. Cafe and gift shop.

USF Botanical Gardens The USF Botanical Gardens offer 10 acres of landscape displays

and collections, a plant shop and bookstore. Enjoy orchids, begonias, palms, tropicals, carnivorous plants, birds, butterflies and more.

Outdoor shit like Botanical Gardens

Captain Memo’s (so close) Original Pirate Cruise

Young or old, Captain Memo's has something for everyone. Cruise away into the fantasy world of swashbucklers aboard, "The Pirate's Ransom." Set your course with the cool reggae island & steel band music playing throughout the rigging of the PIRATES RANSOM. Every passenger will enjoy their choice of free soft drinks, beer, wine, and champagne, while searching for the bountiful dolphins, while aboard ship. 

David A. Straz, Jr. Center for the Performing Arts The Straz Center for the Performing Arts (formerly the Tampa Performing Arts Center)

provides world-class entertainment, ranging from lavish Broadway shows to classical music and rock concerts. It is the largest facility of its kind in the Southeastern United States.

The Dali Museum Experience the new Dali: The largest and most comprehensive collection of Dali's work in

America. Rotating exhibits, programs for all ages, daily tours, films, lectures, music series, family fun Saturdays, exciting store, cafe and much more.

Museum of Science and Industry MOSI is a not-for-profit, community-based institution and educational resource dedicated to

advancing public interest, knowledge, and understanding of science, industry, and technology. With a total size of over 300,000 sq. ft., MOSI is the largest science center in the southeastern United States, and home of the only IMAX Dome Theatre in the state of Florida. Kids In Charge! The Children's Science Center at MOSI is the largest children's science center in the nation. Disasterville, featuring WeatherQuest, MOSI's newest permanent exhibition combines education and 10,000 sq. ft. of interactive exhibits on the remarkable science behind natural disasters.

Arts, Culture, and all that Classy shit

Busch Gardens Tampa Bay combines world-class thrill rides, Broadway-style live entertainment and one of North America’s largest zoos in an unforgettable adventure for the whole family. New this year, Iceploration features world-class skaters, larger-than-life puppets and even animal stars, inspiring audiences to “explore the world ” on a journey to the four corners of the earth. Also new this year, the Animal Care Center welcomes guests to closely observe veterinary care and treatment at this new state-of-the-art facility.

Busch Gardens when we can’t go to Disney

Tampas Lowry Park Zoo Recognized as the number one zoo in the U.S. by both Parents and

Child magazines, Tampa's Lowry Park Zoo features more than 1,700 animals on nearly 60 acres of natural habitats, water play areas, wild rides, educational shows and interactive opportunities.

Big Cat Rescue Stand three feet from a 750-pound tiger.  Take photos that everyone

will think you took on a safari. 100 wild cats - one wild time! Dinosaur World

Visit over 150 life size dinosaurs in an outdoor dinosaur museum. Take home authentic fossils at the Fossil Dig. Unearth a life size dinosaur in the Boneyard. Also enjoy the Skeleton Garden, Caves Exhibit, Deinonychus Island, Carnivore Boardwalk, Giftshop, Picnic Area and more.

Animal things

MERMAIDS

See the world famous mermaids of Weeki Wachee Springs as they perform their version of Hans Christian Andersen's The Little Mermaid.

Have I told you

guys how it’s

my greatest

regret in life

that I was not

born a

mermaid?

THEY ARE REEEAAAAL!

Archibald

Beach

Park

Beaches

Ben T. Davis Beach

Caladesi Isl

and State

Park

Clearwater Beach

Davis Islands Beach

Egmont Key State Park

Fort De Soto Park

Fred Howard Park Beach

Honeymoon Island State Park

Indian Rocks

Beach

John’s Pass Beach

Madeir

a Beach

Pass-A-Grille

Beach

Picnic Island

Reddington

Shores Beach

St. Pete Beach

Treasure Island Beach

Pinellas County

Heritage Village

Yuengling Brewery

Electric Manatee Viewing Center

Free Stuff

*There’s more, I just got lazy

WInery•At The Pier Winery you will find Mango Wine, Pineapple Wine, Grapefruit Wine and over 20 other 100% Florida Citrus and Fruit wines.

•There is also a plethora of Gourmet Food and hot sauces to please your taste buds. Visit The Pier Winery or the John's Pass Winery for a FREE wine tasting!

The Palladium Theatre •Presents Performing Arts in a State-of-the-Art venue that is both intimate and majestic. Built in 1925, the theater features a 880-seat Hough Concert Hall that has recently been remodeled with state-of-the-art sound and lights

•A full-sized Skinner Pipe Organ allows sound to cascade throughout the theater.

CRUISES•Cruise the waters of Tampa Bay while enjoying the area's treasured wildlife and the beatuiful sights St. Petersburg has to offer.

•$22 for adults, 

St. Pete Pier

Has more sunny days a year than Hawaii

Average daily high in January is 70 degrees

10 Community Colleges/Universities

Not So Boring Stats*caution: may still be boring

Don’t you guys love oranges? THEY GROW THEM HERE.

Clearwater Beach has held the record for "most days of sunshine" in the Guinness

Seriously guys, we could DRIVE there faster than we can currently FLY there.

Did you have a bad day at work? Well let’s head to Raglan Road tonight for Guinness and maybe some food.

Did you get a couple days off from work? Let’s go to Magic Kingdom!

Are you craving some Macho Nachos, Lobster Bisque, Mickey mac and cheese, Zebra Domes, or Aquavit? NO PROBLEM, JUST AN HOUR AWAY!

Did someone lose their panda shirt? Did I break one of my souvenirs again? Did you run out of Disney coffee? No need to pay shipping and wait for it like a peasant, we’ll just go pick up a new one! And hey, while we’re there, let’s stop by Philharmagic or Dinosaur.

SERIOUSLY GUYS.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DISNEYWORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MEEEEEEE!

And most importantly………

I would live there, you fools! Come be in the same damn state as me or you’ll be suckmuppets too.