Mean Green Mother

From Outer Space

Ch 4

A Black Widow Challenge

Returning to the challenge brings the delightful scene of Jeannie Widow describing a picture of some hamsters to a random strange on the phone. I think it is one of the Newson kids, Galvin.

With enough money to pay for sporting equipment, the basketball hoop is chosen for the time being. Esther is still just a toddler and Jeannie needs a second player for soccer. For now, this will do.

Speaking of Esther, she manages to cling to her mother without the added support of BW holding her up. That’s one strong toddler.

Jeannie, “Mom, wouldn’t it be better to sleep in a bed instead of in the omelette?”

Jeannie, “I hate homework. Why can’t it just wait until Esther grows up. She can do it for me right? I bet she’d have more fun doing it too. BORING!”

BW, “And this is how you use the potty, Esther. Now you give it a try. On your smaller toddler sized one of course.”

Jeannie, “School is full of drool. School is full of drool. Snoozing, snoring, dull and boring. I wanna stay home, but mom says I can’t. I want to play hooky, but who’d be my confidant? Cripes school is such a waste.”

Jeannie, “But I’ll just put on my best smiley face. Wave to the other boys and girls. Maybe recess won’t be such a drag. Perhaps some merry-go-round twist and twirl; oh I’d love a game of freeze tag.”

It’s been so long since I’ve seen spoiled food. What do you guys think this is? The apocalypse?

In the midst of the day, good BW starts having those familiar labor pains. With a spin and turn, out comes a new born baby… boy! Since we already have Esther, it’s only appropriate to name this lad Sanford. Brown eyes and black hair are no doubt from his late father.

O_O Glitchy bus driver hair?

Jeannie, “A C? I can’t tell if it means they’re actually able to see what’s on my mind in school or if it’s just because I can’t get my homework done. Who invented homework anyway. Isn’t school work more important? I just wanna have some fun!”

Jeannie, “How many times are the cows and the llamas gonna face off this season? I thought football had other teams.”

And after some time in front of the TV, it was time for the ever dreaded stack of homework. Thankfully, it’s Friday.Jeannie, “Stupid homework. I’d like to go back in time and make sure that it was never thought up of.”

Meanwhile, Sanford has been up to no good since he’s been born. Be it being left to sleep on the kitchen floor til he poops himself to vomiting all over dear ol’ BW. Mommy of the year she way not be, but this is just getting more difficult instead of easier.

At first, Esther and Sanford share the single crib. However, scheduling bed times causes problems when both are tired at the same time. With enough cash lying around, hopefully the two tykes can manage to share a bedroom without devastating each other with ear-piercing screams.

Lately, the local slob has been calling BW on a frequent basis. Maybe he could be a potential husband down the line. He certainly has the initiative to socialize with her.

Double birthday! First up Esther.Her personality stats are: 10/6/4/10/0She grows up in a wonderful hair style like Jeannie and similar, if different colored, pajamas.

Next up is Sanford. He grows up in an attire that seems to match his namesake to a degree. I think. >_>Personality of a werewolf. Yes, he is born naturally as 0/10/10/10/0

However, this is the end of all the happiness. You see, something dreadful is about to happen. And I don’t mean the death of another poor husband.

Jeannie, “I’m boiling hot. How come mom doesn’t turn on the cool air?”And that is when doomsday arrived. After somehow over-heating in bed… Jeannie summoned a demon most foul.

THE SOCIAL WORKER!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

And as how beloved BW sleeps soundly, the evil social worker creeps into the house and snatches away all three kids: Jeannie, Esther, and Sanford. All gone!

The Black Widow cries for the loss of her children. So taken aback by this event, the tears stream down in… streams… of tears. (work with me please) With them gone, the Black Widow made up her mind on one thing:

Laitus Pie, “That social worker is going to wish she was never born, let alone had the nerve to steal away my children!”

The following morning…Laitus, “That’s right, the social worker took all three of my kids. Do you know how much that could set us back?”“Don’t worry about it. The worst it’s going to do is set you back score wise. The money will still be in your bank account and you can continue as planned.”

Laitus, “Speaking of which, what is so important about these guys I’m seeking out. I understand the financial side, but what’s the real effect behind their deaths?”“Each man you’ve done in thus far has been a union leader. They keep workers in line. With them gone, the work force will be in total chaos as they won’t be able to fight for the rights they want from their bosses anymore. They’ll have to settle on their terms for the jobs.”

Laitus, “And what about my kids? You’re not just going to let them rot at the adoption agency.”“Of course not. I’ll make sure that they are adopted. No need to worry.”Laitus, “Ok. But there’s just one more thing: do I still have to keep pretending I’m Chloe Singles? This shell is such an annoyance and hindering my plans. I don’t have the tolerance to pull off half the stuff that woman does.”

“Very well. You can behave however you want. Just know that if the coppers catch you, you’re on your own.”Laitus. “Don’t worry. I’ll think of something.”“If there’s nothing else, this conversation is over.”Laitus, “Nothing.”“Good day, Laitus.”Laitus, “Good bye.”

Laitus, I may have lost my three kids, but at least they will hopefully end up in good homes. Still, no child should ever be taken from their mother. I can’t believe that social worker didn’t even give me a chance to explain my case.

Laitus, “First things first: time to go for a look I want.”

Laitus, “Perfect. It’s so wonderful to be able to act like my own self rather than as some cheap romancer. From here on it’s all about making friends in the right places and seeing that some of those friends benefit me.”

Crypto-Night Club makes for the next stop around the downtown area. Mostly so Laitus can give her fun meter a huge boost it needs. Her hobby of playing games certainly pays off at pinball. Male-wise, not much shows up except for Sad Old Guy.

A change of scenery from a club to a park leads Laitus to this wonderful looking chap of some… Something other. Weylon Menon is his name and he’s next on the list of candidates.

Laitus, “How nice of you to join us for a bite of burger, good sir. And whoever might you be?”Weylon, “My name is Weylon. And that’s just about it.”Laitus, “Well, Weylon, did you know your name sounds similar to a company that is connected to aliens? Weyland-Yutani.”Weylon, “No affiliation.”

Laitus, “I hear that it snowed in Strangetown some time ago. Is this true?”Townie, “It happened briefly, but it was still unusual.”Laitus, “Ever think it might happen again?”Weylon, “Doubtful. Could have been a freak weather incident.”

Laitus, “Well, with your knowledge, Mr. Weylon, I bet you’ve scene North-By-Northwest. Even the ending where a train goes through a tunnel.”

Weylon, “I recall that movie. There was a scene that involved an airplane as well, wasn’t there?”Laitus, “Why yes there was.”

Looks like Laitus has some competition over affection. At least the townie doesn’t stand a chance.

One thing was certain: Weylon likes what Laitus has going on.

Another change in location leads Laitus to the spa. A nice location that has an indoor environment for the dark nights, but the bonus of a coffee place to keep energy levels up. Plus there’s showers.

And as Laitus makes her way to powder her nose, she already manages to come across a man who likes what he sees.

His name is Rodney Jung and he’s a corporate lawyer. This will make things fairly interesting for Laitus.

Laitus, “I saw you. Saw you when you looked my way and your heart went all a flutter with that thought bubble above your head. You want me, don’t you?”

Rodney, “Yes, well, that is to say. And um, well, not… To put a fine point I didn’t suspect you were paying that close attention to my gawking.”Laitus, “I didn’t have to see the gawk so much as feel the eyes upon me.”Rodney, “I’m Rodney. And you are?”Laitus, “You can call me Laitus.”

Then for some reason, Rodney starts hitting the trail.Laitus, “Excuse me, Rodney, but is that really anyway to treat someone you just met. Are you off to someplace so important that you can’t even tell someone goodbye that you’ve just said hello to?”

Rodeny, “No, I wasn’t going anywhere important, I was just… in a rush is all. I didn’t think I had to report my doings and actions to a total stranger.”Laitus, “But we’re not strangers. We’re acquaintances. Sure, we may have just met, by I think it’s rather rude that you eye-ball me and then think to flee the scene. Especially when I’m trying to say how much I admire someone of your class.”

Laitus, “Or are you saying now that you’ve been caught you don’t want the cookie being offered?”Rodney, “Uh…”

Sometime later, Rodney is like putty in Laitus’ hands.Rodney soon leaves afterward leaving space open for something very interesting to occur in the meantime.

It starts off with Elmyra Beaker giving the phone signal to her old boyfriend Stewart Armageddon (courtesy of Willowdanin’s Armageddon Apocalypse). From here it just gets… interesting.

Laitus, “Looks like those two are certainly hitting it off well.”

Elmyra, “Have we met before. You look so familiar. Perhaps me met at school.”Laitus, “No. I would remember a face like yours if That were the case. Unless you mean like university school. Then that is a definite no since I’ve never been.”

Laitus, “Time to call up a friend. Or rather, a soon to be friend.”

And in due time, Abhijeet Cho arrives on the scene with friend, Cherry Player, in tow. Or the lead.

And the first thing Abhijeet does is give Elmyra a nice big heartwarming hug.Elmyra, “Oh it’s you. You know this woman, Abhijeet?”Abhijeet, “Sure do. She goes by the name-”Laitus, “Sorry, Abhijeet, but my real name is Laitus, not BW. Just a silly little nick name.”Abhijeet, “Nice to know the real name I suppose. What’s up, chick?”

Abhijeet, “What with a spatula?”Laitus, “Wrong conversation, Abhijeet. I just wanted to thank you for coming out is all.”

Elmyra, “Don’t mind me.”Laitus, “It’s kind of difficult to not notice you standing so close.”Abhijeet, “Yea, Elm. She’s a friend. No need to keep such an eye out.”Elmyra, “Well, it is kind of my job you know.”

Laitus, “Annoying, isn’t she?”Abhijeet, “Who are you talking to?”Laitus, “Oh no one in particular.”

And Shadey stops by the spa. How are you?

Laitus, “Who is this Elmyra stalker girl? Is she like your girlfriend or something?”

Abhijeet, “Relax. She’s just a good friend. Both of us are good friends of the main legacy family in the area and we just happen to know each other. No need to be suspicious of her. Sides, she’s a cop.”Laitus, That’s just great.

Laitus, “I trust you Abhijeet. You are a good friend after all. And maybe…”

Laitus, “…something more.”

“Nice to meet you.”“Likewise.”

And this is when things got scary.Laitus, “What do you guys want?”Elmyra, “I just want to brag is all.”Shadey, “I just want to greet you is all.”

Elmyra, “There’s something not right about that woman. She’s acting awfully suspicious. I could have sworn I saw her swooning over another man earlier today.”

Laitus, “I don’t need to see an eye doctor to notice you following me everywhere.”Elmyra, “Follow you? Don’t be ridiculous. I just happen to be going to the same areas as you.”Laitus, “Don’t you have other places to be?”Elmyra, “I could say the same to you.”Laitus, “Well, I don’t. In fact, I have to meet with someone soon.”

And that special someone, Rodney, arrives just as Elmyra finally leaves. Whew. Sigh of relief.

Laitus, “I’ve missed you for the past few hours. Where have you been?”Rodney, “Taking care of a court case. Doing my job. The usual.”Laitus, “Could spending time with me be a part of the usual?”

They may only be best friends now, but it’s a start down a road to eventually spousal. Stuff. >_>

And wouldn’t you know it? Weylon also pays a visit.Laitus, “What’s got you down, poor dear?”Weylon, “It’s raining.”Laitus, “Don’t you worry. We’ll just go inside and then you won’t be in the rain anymore, now will you?”Weylon, “I knew that.”

Laitus, “See, isn’t this so much better?”Weylon, “Very much so.”

Laitus, “You’re so chill from the wet rain.”Weylon, “And your hand is so warm on my face. Gosh, this feels nice.”Laitus, “That’s because I just happen to know how to make guys like you feel so wonderful.”Laitus, Did those words actually come out of my mouth. I need to think up something more creative than that.

Laitus, “So how about a nice quick date, Weylon?”Weylon, “Sure, why not?”

A nice slow dance is followed by a musical interlude. Or is that the sound of…

BOING!Abhijeet, “Laitus. I thought we had something special. We dance kissed!”Laitus, “Uh, sorry, Abhijeet. I didn’t realize you were still in the area. Stuff happens and what do ya know… You happened to walk in on me. Standing here. By myself.”Abhijeet, “But I know you’re on a date! So I caught you!”

Abhijeet, “Trust me all you want, dudette. You’ve lost all of mine for the time being.”Laitus, “Maybe just for the moment. But I’m sure we’ll be good friends again in time.”

Waylon, “Hey, Laitus, did I ever tell you how much I love you?”Laitus, “Just now. But would you like to show me some lovin’ right now? I could really use some.”

Brightness brought to you by lightning flash.Foreshadow much?

Laitus, “Now I know this may seem sudden and out of the blue, but with the clock ticking away, won’t you marry me?”Weylon, “Really? You’re asking me?”Laitus, “There’s no one else here.”

Waylon, “Very well, I accept!”

And with the internets as your valiant witness, I do declare Laitus and Weylon wife and husband. You may now kiss each other.

A quick trip home leads to a mathematical equation.Laitus, “By my calculations, where X is the chance for a baby, then you have to…. Well, I’ll not go into details. Let’s just say the chances are good that I’ll get pregnant if you do it right.”

And with the wonderful splendor of love finished, it is joined by the heartwarming sound of a lullaby.

Meanwhile, the household has a new newspaper thief and trashcan tipper. Might need to get a security bot sometime in the future to stop this. For now, it’s tolerable. Wow, folks… Abhijeet is now a foe for one of the protagonists. Imagine that.

Laitus, “I see you haven’t changed out of your underwear.”Weylon, “Eh, I’m just lazy. I’ll get to it when I get to it.”

Tickle bug attack.

And slow dancing in the bathroom.

The Black Widow challenge allows the use of 3 elixirs of life. Here’s the first one being used.

Laitus, I don’t know about you, but I’m tired. Maybe you should slip into bed rather than relax on top of it.”Weylon, “Nope, I’m fine.”

Laitus, “What do you think of the omelettes I made. Are they tasty, good, or scrumptious?”Weylon, “Actually, I was thinking how it was cool that we have matching pajamas.”Laitus, “They don’t match. Mine doesn’t have pockets.”

Laitus, “Oh look, Weylon. Looks like the little one is well on his way.”Weylon, “Well, I’d like to take a gander at that belly of yours.”Laitus, “Let’s go outside so you can see it better in the sunlight.”Weylon, “Good idea.”

Weylon, “Wow. To think there’s a little bit of me and a little bit of you all wrapped up right inside of you. And then someday he or she is going to come out and surprise us all.”Laitus, “Speaking of surprises, have you looked up at the sky recently Weylon?”Weylon, “No why?”Laitus, “See for yourself.”

Weylon, “What is it I’m looking for?”Laitus, “Oh just a…”

Laitus, “…satellite that’s fallen out of orbit.”

But this time, the death of the husband is something different. Instead of feeling humdrum about it, Laitus actually possessed a fear for the loss of Weylon. Oops.

Laitus, “I can’t believe I’m shedding so many tears over Weylon. I knew he had to go, but… I didn’t expect to hold any feelings for him. I as so careful with the others. What was so different this time?”

To cheer herself up, Laitus says hello and goodbye to the first person to walk onto the lot.Laitus, “Nice to meet you. Now could you be on your way?”Townie, “Aren’t you going to invite me inside?”Laitus, “Nope.”

As time goes by, the pregnancy goes well. And Laitus receives numerous phone calls from potential candidates.

Laitus, “I know you’re upset Abhijeet, but honestly? Kicking over a trash can and stealing my newspaper? Don’t you have anything better to do?”Abhijeet, “I would hang out over at the legacy house, but Xerxes won’t return my phone calls.”

And soon the day arrives for the newborn to come into the world.Laitus, “I would think that this gets less painful after having gone through it so many times. Can I please get some sedative?”No.

And out pops little baby uh… the name that I forgot to write down. Gimme a sec……Ok, the name of this bouncing baby girl is none other than: Lucy, named after the lead character from I Love LucyAnd looks like he got his papa’s blue eyes and the brown hair from both parents.

Laitus, “Don’t you worry little one. You won’t have just your mom to rely upon for very long. Soon you’ll have a daddy. Not your biological one, but a replacement will due.”

WHATEVER HAPPENEDTO JEANNIE?

Well, Esther and Sanford should also be included, but I really didn’t have much plans for them. However, since Jeannie seems to have more potential, let’s see where she ended up.

Social Worker, “Welcome to your new home Jeannie.”Jeannie, “It’s nice that it has a doggy, but it smells so stinky!”Social Worker, “I’m sure Mr. Roseland has his reasons.”

Cyd, “Hello, little girl. My name is Cyd Roseland and I’ll be you’re new dad.”Jeannie, “Then that makes you number three then.”Cyd, “You’ve been through that many foster families? Hope that doesn’t mean you’re a trouble maker.”Jeannie, “No. My real mom married many dads, so I never had one for long.”

Jeannie, “Um… another thing mister… Do you have anything fun to do here?”Cyd, “Well, I have a lot of books.”Jeannie, “Oh…. Gee, that’s uh… just great.”

5 points per wedding x 45 points per husband death x42 points per accepted proposal x42 points per pregnancy x41 point per Grow Up well x5 (2 Jeannie, 2 Esther, 1 Sanford)

-1 point per rejected proposal-5 points per child taken by social services x3---------------------------------------------------------------Point total = 45

Fin