An Old

ReflectionsCompiled by:

Brad & Jan AngersMarch, 2007

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I came as a guest of Dr Henry Nuss to put on a comedy magic show for the Bonehead Club in

1960. Grover Keeton was Big Chief .... A part of my act required a member of the audience to hold a 25 pound block of ice while I ignored him. Towards the end of my act (about 20 minutes or so later, at the request of the members I turned my attention to the member holding the ice. He was R.C. Rains, one of the largest men in the club. His fingers had melted a good four inches in the ice. He never said a word. His eyes though were filled with blood & daggers. I said I almost forgot about you ... you can set it down now . His hands were blue and wet. I said Here .. lets dry off those hands. I then cut off his tie to wipe them. The group rolled in laughter. R.C. Still was quiet ... almost too quiet.

Introduction

The next day R.C. called me and asked that I be at their next meeting. I had no idea what I was in for ... but I went. When the meeting began I was asked to come to the head table where Dr. Grover Keeton & Dr Layton Bailey, Jr. said that I had been proposed for membership. I had been asked to join a group of the cream of Dallas businessmen. I was overwhelmed. For the next 37 years I attended meetings, had fun and put out the Pithy. I rose thru the offices of Scribbler, Money Grabber and Little Chief. J .Howard Payne had asked me to take over the office of Archives. And I carried those duties with gusto. I was officially sworn in as Big Chief in 1977. And along with the many programs the Boneheads had, I added The Bonehead of the Year Awards. Working with my good Friend Dr. Daugherty for over 24 years. My wife Jan & I left Dallas and moved to Florida in 1997. I have been an active member of the Bonehead Club for over 37 years. Bradford J. Angers

In The Beginning....... One summer in 1919, A few of Dallas’s most famous and influential leaders were having breakfast in the coffee shop in the old Oriental Hotel,(later to be called the Baker Hotel) a gathering which had become a ritual. Among them were Joe Bailey, you know, the Mobile Oil guy that owns that building with the big flying Red Horse on top, W.C. Evertt, an executive with “The Official Family”, Texas Sunday School Association and later the first Big Chief of The Bonehead Club. Newspaper man, Lewis Bailey, Judge W.C. Graves, S.M.U. Dean, E.D. Jennings, J. Howard Payne, Journalist J. J. Taylor, and Newspaper man George Webster. Joe Bailey casually asked the waitress if their group was getting too big. She retorted, “I enjoy listening to you boneheads” That remark struck home and all agreed they really were boneheads and even began referring to themselves as such.

Who Are We???

Classifying the Boneheads would be like explaining how no two snowflakes are alike. A Bonehead loves life. He has learned how to laugh at life and is always ready to venture into unknown worlds. Only in the Bonehead Club would one find a man like D.Harold Byrd, who on a whim, charters a couple of planes and takes the Boneheads to Mexico just to be a little different.  A group that would don overalls, acquire  a couple of trucks, park them in an intersection outside the Adolphus Hotel. Then with compressed air jackhammers. break a 4 ft by 4 ft hole in the middle of commerce street, (while uniformed police that were afraid to ask why) directed traffic around the area. Soon as a 4ft hole was opened, a second truck backed up and the Boneheads planted a tree in the intersection an jumped in the trucks and drove away.   Only the Boneheads could block the runways at Love Field and hold up traffic for two hours to settle an issue. (The airline had to fly in 20 hostesses to take the club to breakfast before they relented) Only the Boneheads could give a Bonehead trophy to the President of The United States and get enough of a laugh out of him to have him call upon Mickey Mantle to fly to Dallas to get his trophy.  The pre-presentation party the night before, the President called.  A waitress came in and asked “Is there a Brad Angers in here” I stood up and she “said some nut says he is the president wants to talk to you.” It was his acceptance of the trophy. Only the Boneheads would get up and walk out on Bob Hope as he rose to speak. (When other clubs were paying $10,000. for just 10 minutes of his time), get their laughs from a couple of disk jockeys who were walked out on and decided to get even. They went a week without shaving, and in wrinkled clothes, mussed hair and a sleepless appearance were at the Bonehead rostrum talking as though they never left.  The Boneheads loved it and made them honorary members of the Club. Only the Boneheads would lay honor on the first team to lose a Superbowl, or get a judge in Las Vegas to issue a subpoena to have Jimmy The Greek appear at a meeting.  Only the Boneheads would hold a silver service, candle-lit dinner in a McDonalds, or get the city to turn over an old fire department hook and ladder truck so that they could repair, repaint and renumber it #57 then give it back to the city so they could take them to the State Fair of Texas to close the gates………….. But the memories live on.

HISTORICAL FIRSTS: The Bonehead Pea Knife Corporation was founded by Dr.’s Craig Dunlap, J. Howard Payne, John Collom and Dr. George R. Angell. Dr. Payne said that peas should be eaten with a knife. Dr. Joe Bailey said that “I eat my peas with honey, I’ve done it all my life. It does make the peas taste funny, but it keeps them on the knife”. The Pea Knife has a slot running the length of the blade to align the peas. 57 shares of Stock was issued with a par value of $1,000,000.00. Among the antics of the Club, A few stood out. “Annual Look Up Day” This began on a Friday about a half hour before their meetings. A few members arrived early and stood on the corner looking and pointing up at the hotel. As others arrived they also began to look up. Pointing and meaningless dialog such as “Is he going to jump?” etc. soon other people began to gather and as the crowd

THE MEETINGS: The Club met for a few years at the Baker Hotel and later took up residence in the Adolphus Hotel across the street, where it met for over 65 years. During a major remodeling of the hotel they began meeting at various hotels and clubs.

THE MEMBERSHIP: The membership was limited, by charter, to 57 (Fifty-seven) members. The reason given was that in 1919 Heinz had advertised their 57 varieties of pickles...so...we became the 57 varieties of NUTS. The members elected to wear a derby as a part of their dress.Because limitations placed on membership and the desire of many Dallasites wanting to be members (one had to be sponsored for membership) and a desire to keep everyone happy, the club created the class of want-to-be’s as a “Half Baked” list where they could attend meetings and have lunch but were not allowed to vote on issues. They would be admitted to active membership as a place became available basis. The Club has a Big Chief as President, Little Chief as Vice President, A Money Grabber as Treasurer and a Scribbler as Secretary.

RECOGNITION The Dallas Morning News in October of 1927 devoted an entire section of their paper (12 pages) to the Bonehead Club. This paper was later reprinted by Dr. Brad Angers.

BONEHEAD BULLETIN The derby covered osseous make-up of a Bonehead’s bean has been referred to a mass of pithy knowledge, thus the instinctive naming of their bulletin as The Pithyossious. Most of the time it has little to offer, other times the Pithy runneth over.

J. J. Taylor said they should form a club and have formal meetings. They all agreed and asked Joe Bailey and J. Howard Payne to go to Austin and file corporation papers for the club. In Austin they faced a mild mannered clerk who was to file the necessary papers. He asked “What do you call your organization?” J. Howard Payne said “The Bonehead Club of Dallas”. The clerk kept a straight face and then asked if they had their Resolutions. Joe Bailey said I guess so, and said “Resolved, to learn more and more about less and less, until eventually we shall know everything about nothing”. Again the clerk kept a straight face and finished the filing procedure. The Bonehead Club of Dallas was now official.

BONEHEAD OF THE YEAR: In 1963 Dr Brad Angers and Dr Ed Daugherty were having lunch when news came over the radio about a great winning year for one of Texas teams. Ed said it’s a shame that only winners get all the honors. Someone should recognize the losers because without them there would not be winners. Real Bonehead logic at work. Dr Angers suggested that a trophy be made and given to a loser. This great brain power followed with a trophy but no one to give it to. Then in a burst of luck, the Cotton Bowl had a real loser. The midshipmen from The United States Naval Academy came to Texas and lost to Texas 28 to 6. Wow! What an opportunity. Dr Angers called Admiral Charles C. Kirkpatrick and told him that he was to receive The Bonehead of The Year Award. Admiral Kirkpatrick Called Capt. Burris Wood, a top Naval Officer, Capt. William Racette, Commanding Officer of the Naval Air Station, Capt. Jimmy E. Savage, Dir. Naval Recruiting and Clarence Talley, Pres. Navy League. Capt. Kirkpatrick advised the Club that he was sending a group of Cadets to bring the trophy to Annapolis. The Admiral asked if we were going to make this a permanent award to the Academy. Dr Angers said that if anyone does anything as silly, we would take the trophy back and award it again. Well as history shows, The following year Jim Marshall a Minnesota Viking scooped up a fumbled ball and ran the wrong way for a touchdown giving points to the opposing team. The Boneheads had a real loser, and so the story goes as you will see on the following pages.

But first, a little more of the Bonehead historical history.

grew, the members went into the hotel for lunch and their meetings. After lunch as they returned to the street they usually found a massive crowd, each with their own interpretation of what is going on. Fire trucks, an ambulance and police were trying to keep order. Oh well.

CLOSING OF THE STATE FAIR: It occurred to the membership that every year the State Fair of Texas had an opening day ceremony. Ribbon cutting and all that. Well, how can one condone an opening of an event that had never been officially closed. Well it didn’t take long for the Boneheads to talk the Dallas Fire Department to drive the Club to the park the day before the opening so they could have a closing ceremony. It drew a lot of Dallas residents to cheer the Boneheads riding the fire truck thru downtown Dallas on the way to the park. A tradition that is still observed.

Typical Bonehead Members Awards

BONEHEAD CLUB of DALLASMOTHER CLUB OF THE WORLD

BONEHEAD UNIVERSITY Shortly after the Bonehead Club was chartered SMU, the leading educational institution in this area, was obviously suffering from lack of a top flight faculty. We know this because the President, Vice-President and leading professor were members of our September body. Realizing the void (I can’t spell vacuum), the members established bonehead University, an institution dedicated to providing infinite knowledge of the nonessential including, but no limited to, the dispensing of intelligent and refreshing nonsense. Every university needs a building. therefore, the Boneheads immediately began construction of a 57 story edifice with one floor for each professor. Each member is a professor, of course, because after, the club was chartered as an educational institution by the State of Texas. Each was allowed his own style of architecture. Therefore, the 2nd floor is Baroque, the 3rd floor Byzantine, the 4th French Gothic, and so on up to the 57th which is Rakookoo. Architects might insists the later style be spelled “rococo” but believe me, our architecture must be spelled with a “k”. As is the case of any well run institution, the Board of Directors assumed complete responsibility for the construction. And as is the case in many institution, the Chairman of the Board, being our Big Chief., appointed committees and made them fully responsible. Two members were assigned to plan each of the four sides of the building. One is hang wall construction, another concrete block, another brick and the fourth side is bamboo and balsa, which allows for a certain amount of sway, It stands today as an architectural marvel. You might have a little difficulty finding the campus inasmuch as we don’t have one. Actually the original site was intended to be in Letot, Texas, but his was the subject of great controversy. Therefore only 56 stories, the 2nd through the 57th, are now being completed, When we find a suitable campus, the first floor will be constructed. In the meantime, the building just hangs around in various locations. Each year in April the building committee meets and insists that the big Chief complete the first floor, which of course is for the use of the Big Chief. So far each Big Chief has immediately call the club together for what he calls a Christmas party, then resigns and turns the problem over to the Little Chief, who is then sworn in as big chief. He, of course, can do nothing until the building committee makes it personal report to him. The building committee only meets in April and is repeated.

Naturally, the first day of the school year is called the “Commencement”. Can you imagine, some institutions call the last day of the school year the “Commencement.” and they call us “Boneheads”. This progressive institution is the only graduate school in the world to award the degree of Cerebrum Ataxia (confused brain). Many have made application for this degree, many wives have nominated their husbands (and vice versa) and many voters have nominated leaders of opposing parties. However, this department is filled to capacity with members of the club, each of whom finally is awarded this degree. BU has another distinction not shared by any other school, it is the home of the mother chapter of the fraternity Delta Kappa Nu (DON’T KNOW NOTHING).

Fifty-seven is a magic number to the Dallas Bonehead Club. Fifty- seven members make up the local gaggle of gangsters. They call themselves "fifty--seven varieties of nuts." That's why the club couldn't stand by and watch ol' 57 go to the bone yard. Especially since the obsolete and old 57-foot Dallas fire truck that was commissioned in 1957 and assigned to Fire Station 57. So members pitched in and bought the decommissioned hook-and-ladder tractor-trailer. They agreed to return it bright and shiny as a gift to the Fire Department. Veteran firefighters warned the Boneheads that restoring it to former glory could cost up to $100,000.

"That's about what it took," says club archivist Brad Angers. That includes the generosity of local businessmen and 3,000 hours of Bonehead power. Members provided nearly all the labor. For a year, they worked on the truck nights and weekends in a Carrollton warehouse. On Friday, opening day of the State Fair (when Boneheads traditionally hold closing ceremonies), ol' 57, bright and shiny, will go home to stay. "It was a labor of love," says Angers. But if any Bonehead dares to suggest restoring another old fire engine, he can forget it. Once is more than

enough.

The Bonehead Pea Knife Corporation was founded by Dr.’s Craig Dunlap, J. Howard Payne, John Collom and Dr. George R. Angell. Dr. Payne said that peas should be eaten with a knife. Dr. Joe Bailey said that “I eat my peas with honey, I’ve done it all my life. It does make the peas taste funny, but it keeps them on the knife”. The Pea Knife had a slot running the length of the blade to align the peas. Dr. Arthur A. Everts issued 57 shares of stock with a par value of $1,000,000.00.

Sunday, August 21,1966

Nothing's Fine For Boneheads By TOMMY AYRESStaff Writer While others strive for such commendable goals as ending all war and buying': band uniforms, one stalwart group of Dallasites finds its Inspiration in the motto: "To learn more and more about less and less until, eventually,' we know everything about nothing." Many are their contributions to the civic and social well being of Dallas. Among the more noteworthy are: The Bonehead Building- a 56-floor architectural marvel because It was supposed to have 57 floors and the first floor has yet to be completed. The creation of Bonehead University - the world's only educational institution dedicated solely to providing an infinite knowledge of the nonessential. Sponsorship of the Most Useless Citizen Award - presented annually to Dallas' "most useless citizen." Few are the Dallasites who have not heard of the colorful shenanigans pulled by the Bonehead Club of Dallas over the years. Yet few are aware of the serious goals which motivate their actions - mostly because there are none. "The Bonehead Club," explains Howard Payne, the only remaining charter member, "was organized that gentlemen might get together and Indulge in a bit of wit and humor. "EVERYTHING WE DO is strictly in fun," he says. "We leave service to the service clubs." In reality, most of the Boneheads are deadly serious civic workers in other organizations. But each Friday at noon they blot out all worldly cares, let down their hair (those who are so fortunate) and have a knee - slapping good time. It all began back in 1919 when a gent named W. C. Everett decided such an organization was needed in a world beset by such awesome problems. His idea was well received it soon became apparent the club would have to set a membership limitation. AFTER MUCH thought and discussion. it was decided the number would be 57 - only coincidental was the fact a popular dilly of the day advertised 57 varieties of pickles. The club gained early fame by actually doing a good deed. It all started one day when the city police and fire commissioners unceremoniously began poking one another with doubled fists, … but … Unbeknownst to the combatants, the Boneheads elected themselves mediators and invited both to their next meeting. There, two club members armed themselves with cotton - stuffed black stockings and engaged in a donnybrook equaled only by War II. The commissIoners doubled in laughter. shook hands and became famous friends. The Boneheads gained national notoriety in the 1940s after Elliot Roosevelt's dog replaced a soldier on a flight from England. They hauled an army of yelping mutts to the airline's Dallas office and demanded passage for them. "Elliot's dog ain't no better than ours,"They argued. WHEN THE COUNTRY was without a vice president back in 1945, the Boneheads offered Truman his choice of any or all of their 56 years. A major Bonehead contribution to science came when club members unquestionably proved a chicken is a vegetable . After much research it was determined - "a chicken is a hen . . . a hen manufactures eggs . . . therefore a hen is an egg factory…….. A factory is a plant…so being a plant ... , a hen has to be a vegetable" - …or logic similar thereof. Bonehead University was created, (say the Boneheads) because Southern Methodist University was suffering from a lack of top flight faculty members. BONEHEAD UNIVERSITY confers degrees of Doctor of Cerebrum(brain) Ataxia. (confusion) in an effort to upgrade the SMU faculty. In 1963 the Bonehead of the Year Award was established by the award-conscious Boneheads. Last year's recipient was Jim Marshall, Minnesota Viking end who endeared himself to the August body by running the wrong way or a touchdown. Marshall lived up to his "wrong way" title by boarding the wrong plane and being in Chicago while the trophy was presented to him in Dallas. "The only fellow to get something on us," recalls Payne was Weldon Owens (Times Herald columnist). He walked out on us first--but we're still laying for him."

DALLAS TIMES HERALD

Dallas Morning News, Thursday,January 16, 1964.

BONEHEAD CLUB 'HONORS' NAVY WITH GRID TROPHY

The Dallas Bonehead Club will award its annual football trophy to The UNITED STATES Naval Academy Friday in the Cafe D'Or room of The Sheraton Dallas Hotel at their regular noon meeting. Receiving the award for the Navy will be several Dallas area officers appointed by Adm. Charles C. Kirkpatrick, Naval Academy Superin-tendent. The award is being presented to Navy for their 'Bonehead' stunt of challenging the entire State of Texas in the Cotton Bowl. The Bonehead Club is Dallas' leading fun club. It searches out the unusual and pays tribute to the hapless. "This Is our sincerest form of tribute to a gallant Navy team that despite their numbers invaded Texas, and against overwhelming odds were soundly beaten." The trophy, a beautiful walnut and silver creation is topped by a large silver nut. The Bonehead Club can speak with authority on football as their school, Bonehead University, has a football team that has gone unbeaten and untied since 1919. (Of course it has never played a game).

DUBIOUS HONOR FOR NAVY Capt. Burris D. Wood Jr., center, ranking Naval officer in the Dallas area, accepts the "Bonehead of the Year" award. The award was presented in its usual zany tradition by the Dallas Bonehead Club to the Naval Academy for making the mistake of challenging Texas in the recent Cotton Bowl Game, which Texas won, 28-6. Capt. Burris went along with the gag to accept in behalf of the Academy from Bonehead Club Big Chief Tom Eggleston, left and Little Chief Glen Galbraith.

1964

Middies’ RewardA Navy Kernel?Are They Nuts?

A large silver nut supported by a trophy was to be presented to the U.S. Naval Academy at noon Friday in the latest nutty affair staged by the Dallas Bonehead Club. The award, says the club, is being presented to Navy for its "Bonehead" stunt of challenging "the entire State of Texas in the Cotton Bowl."! Receiving the award in the Sheraton-Dallas Hotel were to be officers appointed by retiring Academy Supt. C. C. Kirkpatrick: Capt B. D. Wood, inspector of naval material; Capt. William A. Racette, commanding officer of the U.S. Naval Air Station; Capt. Jimmy E. Savage, director of naval recruiting for the Seventh Recruiting Area; Clarence Talley, President of the Navy League, and several enlisted men. The Bonehead Club says its presentation "is our sincerest form of tribute to a gallant Navy team that, despite their number, invaded Texas and against overwhelming odds were soundly beaten." The trophy is a silver and walnut creation. Members of the Bonehead Club, an organization dedicated to unusual stunts, are leading citizens of Dallas.

1964

Program Chairman Dr. Brad Angers shaking hands with Capt. Burris Wood, USN

Pictured: Minnesota Vikings” Jim Marshall, left, and Reed May, “Coach of Bonehead University”, got together upon Marshall’s” belated arrival in Dallas yesterday. Friday, January 22, 1965.

A Day for the Boneheads

Jim Marshall pulled the bonehead play of the 1964 football season. The Minnesota Viking defensive back picked up a San Francisco fumble ran with it - the wrong way. He journeyed for 60 yards to score a safety for the 49gers. For this classic play Marshall was selected as Bonehead of the Year by that famous bunch of Dallas - nuts, the Bonehead Club. Friday Was Marshall's day. The award that last year went to Navy for its decision to play Texas in the Cotton Bowl went to Marshall. The Boneheads gathered en masse Friday morning at Love Field to meet their good-natured hero. A host of beautiful girls was on hand. A police escort was around to lead Marshall to the Adolphus Hotel luncheon in his honor. There were signs kidding Marshall. The best one read: "Jim Marshall ... Welcome Back to San Francisco." But Marshall didn't laugh . Jim Marshall did it again. He missed his airplane in

Minneapolis.

February 1, 1965Jim Marshall, as having “a first-rate mind, a winning disposition and a community-wide reputation”. On that last point there can be no doubt, Marshall is the Minnesota Viking defensive end who picked up a fumble and ran 66 yards the wrong way, thereby scoring a safety for San Francisco. His other activities have included making 34 parachute jumps without once putting the harness on upside down, shooting himself in the stomach with a revolver he as unloading and peddling wigs. He also in the same Marshall who was to fly to Dallas recently to receive the bonehead of the Year award. Taking the wrong turn off the expressway to the airport, Marshall screeched up to the terminal late for his flight, raced out to the boarding area and - that’s right -- wound up on a plane for Chicago instead of Dallas.

1965

BONEHEAD CLUB TO HONORVIKINGS’ WRONG-WAY END

The Dallas Bonehead Club will award its annual football trophy to Jim Marshall, defensive end for the Minnesota Vikings, Friday in the Century Room of the Hotel Adolphus at their regular noon meeting.The trophy was awarded to the Naval Academy last year and is being returned to Dallas for its representation. Marshall, a graduate of Ohio State, is the lad who ran the wrong way for a touchdown while his team was playing the San Francisco 49ers, a play well worthy of his being nominated “Bonehead of the Year.” Marshall will receive presentations at the luncheon from the Junior Chamber of Commerce and other groups was well as the trophy. A host of Dallas Cowboys (football variety) will also be present.

Viking Late at Valhalla

Marshall Victim of Aerial BonerBy Walter RobertsonNews Sports Editor

If and when one of the big movie companies gets around to filming “The Adventures of Jim Marshall” --- and surely one of them will --- they’ll throw away the scripts. No script writer could write it the way the big Minnesota Viking defensive end plays it for real. MARSHALL, you’ll recall with side-splitting laughter, is the man who picked a fumbled pass reception off the ground against the San Francisco 49ers this past autumn and raced it back for a score --- for the 49ers. He sped joyfully into the Viking end zone only to see the referee woefully signal 49ers safety. And Friday he added an almost unbelievable chapter to his wrong-way tale. He left his Minneapolis home bound for Dallas to receive an award from the Dallas bonehead Club and ended up in Chicago. The boneheads, who had planned to present Marshall their second annual “Bonehead of the Year Award” at a noon luncheon immediately were suspect in planning it that way. but it turned out that not even the famed Dallas high-jinx club could match with any scheme what happens to Marshall without trying. MARSHALL left Minneapolis Friday morning chuckling at the thought of another lucrative fringe-benefit of an endless string of them that have come his way since he become the most famous wrong-wayer since Roy Riegel and Wrong-Way Corrigan. But a few minutes from the Minneapolis airport his cab became snarled in a traffic jam created by an accident up ahead. Traffic was rerouted ---- the wrong way, naturally --- and when Marshall finally raced breathlessly toward his plane at the airport, it taxied away from him down the runway and lifted off toward Dallas. Sympathetic airline officials quickly put him aboard the plane to Chicago and assured him he could make a connection there that would put him in Dallas shortly after noon, still in plenty of time for the bonehead program. AND IT would have, too. Except for a 45-minute delay while mechanics fussed over a troublesome engine, finally giving up and transferring all the passengers to another plane. Smooth sailing, now? Not as long as Marshall was within a 66-yard run of the new plane. Now came a 2-hour wait while the new plane’s crew was sent over from Detroit. Marshall finally stepped off a plane at Love Field at 3:35 p.m. but he still was laughing and allowed that he would as long as football fans laughed with him ... and offered handsome fees to get him to retell his story of the 66-yard run to immortality.

1965

DALLAS TIMES HERALD DALLAS

DICK HITT

People, Places & Furthermore --- Modern world dept.: the Internal Revenue Service now offers a “Drive-In Tax Service” window ... You probably read on our sports page (where it really belongs) that the boneheads were to give their annual awards Friday to Jim Marshall, the pro footballer who made a wrong-way touchdown run. When the jetliner landed at Love Field Friday, Marshall of course wasn’t on it, having missed the connection flight somewhere around Minneapolis or Chicago. Which tended to reduce the effect of the big, beautiful sign Braniff Airways had painted for the Love Field arrival. The sign said “Montreal” .... The Bonehead award, by the way, is a big (and expensive silver trophy that is topped by a silver-plated walnut. Last year’s winner, the Naval Academy, actually displayed it in its Annapolis trophy case all year until turning it back in so it could be awarded to another victim...

BLACKIE SHERRODBypassing the Busch League

FAR BE IT from this timid soul to correct the Bonehead Clubbers of Dallas, these people are pranksters deluxe and we have no desire to find soap flakes in the hominy and smoke bombs under the hood for the next calendar year. On a single-point, however, we would differ.The Boneheads held an election the other day and Jim Marshall of the Minnesota pro footballers won it. We would have voted another way,Marshall picked up a fumble and run for the wrong goal in one of life’s embarrassing moments. the boneheads voted him bonehead of the Year and certainly his deed, or misdeed, deserved recognition. Still it is difficult to see how Marshall or anyone else finished ahead of August Busch in any sort of boner competition.

Jim Marshall, left is greeted by a couple of admirers, Cowboy back Amos Marsh, Center, and Bonehead “Coach” Reed May.

1965

1966BONEHEADS

Frustrated Twin TV Bit Cited The National Broadcasting Co. received the 1966 Bonehead of the Year Award from the Dallas club Friday for its broadcast of a professional football game and the gemini 7 launch on the same screen at the same time. A secondary award, presented for the first time in Bonehead Club history, went to Clint Murchinson, Jr., the owner of the Dallas Cowboys. “Words Fail Us” read the plaque placed on a one of a kind trophy composed of Darwin’s monkey contemplating a skull with a cowboy helmet on it. The two awards were presented at the Bonehead Club’s luncheon. William B. Monroe, NBC Washington Bureau chief, accepted the award, a walnut and silver creation topped by a large silver nut. “This is our only way of expressing the sorrow we have for those poor souls in the NBC-TV news department who must have sat up many a night trying to decide which program should have priority, then in a moment of complete frustration, threw common sense to the wind and blundered their mistake across the screens of millions of unbelieving television viewers,” the Bonehead members said.

Twin Telecast Wins Bonehead of the Year Award

DALLAS (UPI) -- The Dallas Bonehead Club “Bonehead of the Year” award will be presented Friday to the NBC news department for its broadcast of a professional football game and the gemini 7 launch Dec. 4 on the same screen at the same time.William B. Monroe, NBC Washing -ton bureau chief, will accept the trophy of walnut and silver topped by a large silver nut.

Bob Gould, TV Program Director and Roy Bacus, General Manager of WBAP TV, our local NBC affiliate station, accepting the Bonehead of the Year award that was presented to the Network.

The proud peacock lays an egg.

1967 1968

SCALPEDCHIEF RECEIVE

‘LOSERS OF YEAR’ AWARD

Members of the Kansas City Chiefs, the first football team to lose the national AFL-NFL championship, were honored Friday by the Dallas Bonehead Club. The club, which does, about everything backwards, award-ed the annual Bonehead of the Year trophy to the Chiefs’ owner, Lamar Hunt, and the team Friday at the club's luncheon at the Adolphus Hotel. The award was presented because of a “deep feeling” the Boneheads have for losers. Members of the club include leading citizens who take pride in a good sense of humor. The trophy is a walnut and silver creation topped by a large silver nut.

Bonehead Trophy Goes to Aggies

Texas A & M has won again in Dallas The Aggies have been named winners of the “Bonehead of the Year. When asked why the Aggies won, the Boneheads said “for no reason they could think of except Gene Stallings, who coached the Aggies into the Cotton Bowl while cadets and their girlfriends just stood around in the bleachers.” The trophy will be presented Friday by the Dallas Bonehead Club. Accepting the award at the noon session in the Terrace Room of the Baker Hotel will be Aggie assistant athletic director Marvin Tate and members of the student body. The Dallas A & M Club also will be present. Last year, the trophy went to Lamar Hunt. His Kansas City Chiefs had been the first team to lose in the Super Bowl. Other winners have been Navy in 1964, Minnesota Vikings Jim Marshall and the National Broadcasting company.

Coach Gene Stallings

Chief’s Owner Lamar Hunt

The Dallas Morning News Wednesday, January 22, 1969

Super Bonehead Snyder

Odds’ on Choice for Title

The odds were 75-1 that it was inevitable. Jimmy (The Greek) Snyder famed Las Vegas oddsmaker who officially established Baltimore' an 18 1/2-point favorite over the Jets in the Super Bowl game, has been named "Bonehead of the Year" by the Dallas Bonehead Club. Snyder will come to Dallas Friday to accept the award, a walnut and silver trophy topped by a large silver nut. The affair will begin at noon at the Baker Hotel Crystal Ballroom. "This prediction literally led millions of loyal football fans down the primrose path to financial ruin." the nationally feared Dallas fun-poking organization declared. The club originated its "Bonehead of the Year” award in 1964. "”to pay proper tribute" to the Navy football team following its decisive loss to Texas in the' 1964 Cotton Bowl game. The award subsequently has gone to Minnesota Viking Jim (Wrong Way) Marshall. the National Broadcasting Co .. Kansas City Chief owner Lamar Hunt, and last year to Texas A&M University. Snyder, who reportedly has been vacationing incognito in California since the Super Bowl, has promised to make the scene in Dallas for the presentation and to display the Bonehead trophy in Las Vegas the rest of the year. And he's booking 12-5 money that he's the most deserving recipient the awards has known.

Jimmy the Greek had a rabbit in the hat, but the Super Bowl turned the bunny to sour grapes. The oddsmaker received the bonehead of the Year award today.

1969

BONEHEAD CLUB of DALLAS MOTHU Club Of THE WORLD

Added to His Fame DALLAS TIMES HERALD, Friday. Jan. 24, 1969

Greek loves Jets? By STEVE PERKINS

Dimitros Synodopoulos sipped his glass of ouzo and demanded: "When do the Jets play the Cowboys here?" Sept. 6 was the answer. “I guarantee -- you I'll be here," said Dimitros. "Sweet vengeance! It was not the ouzo talking. Rather It was Jimmy The Greek, the fellow who was most famously hoist on Joe Namath's petard. '" I MAKE the Cowboys a 13-point favorite," said Dimitrios - Jimmy. "They'll be at least a solid 10." So spake the man who was to he honored today by the Dallas Bonehead Club as the "Bonehead of the Year" for his 171/2 - point spread on the Baltimore-NY Jets Super Bowl contest. The country's recognized odds maker (not bookmaker), who establishes the national betting line each week from his Las Vegas public relations office, figures that the wrong call on the Jets was a bonanza for his business. "How could you get more publicity than that?" he asked. "Only if your name is Joe Namath," he answered. Jimmy The Greek Snider ("I Wish I had kept the Dimitrios, but what are you going to do with Synodopoulos?") has no tear of damaging his pro reputation. He hit on 76 per cent of his betting tips this past season and all eight "specials" he sent to the subscribers of his $400 (per annum) Sports Newsletter. He picked one bowl game and advised one and all to "send it in." The game was the Cotton Bow] and the team was Texas. BUT THERE is a personal mailer here, and so the Greek will look forward to the Cowboy-Jet game In September. "But I won't pick Dallas to win it all next year the way I did last year," he said. "They need more togetherness before they can be a champion. I'll wait and see if they get It. In fact, I'm going to make the Cowboys so mad at me . . . I'm going to make them so much of a 'dog' by the time they play , the Jets, they'll tear 'em apart." The press and the TV men, gathered at the party in his honor thrown by Ulysses Vlamides, owner of the Majestic Steak House, in "Ulie's" private club adjacent to the restaurant on Elm, pressed The Greek for his call on the Cowboys-Jet if Meredith or Morton were the quarterback. "Is there a difference?" he asked. "I don't think so. Maybe I'll make it a point more if Meredith Is quarterback, a point less if Morton. No more than that."

1969

Monday, January, 1969 -- DALLAS TIMES HERALD

An Evening With the Greek

JIMMY THE Greek Snyder was a household name long before Spiro Agnew, at least in the country's more sportive households. His non public name is Dimitrios Synodopoulos, and he is the noted oddsmaker. He stands an inch or so above the six-foot 'level, and he's husky, crisp and dark with a rare kind of clean cut swarthiness. Looks a little Greek, as a matter of fact. Jimmy was in Dallas, as you have read by now, to receive the Bonehead Club's top award of the year for his choice of the Baltimore Colts over the New York Jets. By 17 1/2. He hardly ever makes mistakes of that magnitude, and when he does it qualifies him to be Bonehead of the Year.

Bonehead’s to honor The Greek

Jimmy “the Greek Snyder must have a good sense of humor. If not, he wouldn’t be coming to Dallas to be named ‘Bonehead of the Year.” That’s the honor he’ll receive Friday from that bunch of local nuts, the Bonehead Club. Synder, who works out of Las Vegas, is the originator of the national betting line. As the leading odds merchant, it was Snyder’s job to set the line on the recent Super Bowl game between Baltimore and the New York Jets. He tabbed Baltimore by 17 1/2 points. New York won by 9 points.

1969Dick Hitt

The Dallas Morning News

1970Bonehead

ClubAwards

AFL

That foolish old American Football League. First, it pays $18 million dollars to join the National Football League. Then, after paying all that money, it goes out and beats the tar out of the NFL in the Super Bowl. For paying $18 million for “the rather dubious privilege of joining a bunch of losers”. The Dallas Bonehead Club presented its annual, “Bonehead of the Year award Friday to the now nonexistent AFL. Lamar Hunt, founder of the AFL and owner of the Super Bowl champs Kansas City Chiefs accepted the trophy for the entire league. The Dallas Bonehead Club annually presents the award for the biggest “Bonehead stunt” the previous year in the world of sports. Las Vegas gambler Jimmy the Greek won last year’s award for picking the Baltimore Colts by 17 points over the New York Jets in the 1969 super Bowl. The Bonehead Club said there were many top candidates for bad moves in 1969. One of the runners-up included: --Dallas Cowboys kicker Mike Clark for completely missing the football while trying an outside kick against the Cleveland Browns in the Eastern Conference playoff game.

The Birmingham News Sun., Jan. 25, 1970

DALLAS (UPl) - That foolish old American Football League. First, it pays $18 million dollars to join the National Football League. Then, after paying all that money, it goes out and beats the tar out of the NFL in the Super Bowl. For paying $18 million for "the rather dubious privilege of joining a bunch of losers." the Dallas Bonehead Club presented its annual "Bonehead of the Year" Award Friday to the now non-existent AFL. Lamar Hunt, founder of the AFL and owner of the Super Bowl Champs Kansas City Chiefs, accepted the trophy for the entire league. The Dallas Bonehead Club annually presents the award for the biggest ”Bonehead stunt" the previous year in the world of sports. Las Vegas gambler Jimmy the Greek won last year's award for picking the Baltimore Colts by 17 points over the New York Jets in the 1969 Super Bowl. The Bonehead Club said there were many top candidates for bad moves in 1969. Some of the runners-up included: --Dallas Cowboy Kicker Mike Clark for completely missing the football while trying an onside kick against the Cleveland Browns in the Eastern Conference playoff game. --Penn State Coach Joe Paterno and his bowl-choosing committee '" for passing ~ up the chance to play top-ranked Texas in the Cotton Bowl and thereby remaining No.2. --The extravagant Super Bowl half-time show ……..… ….that "flopped." .

Joining Losers

HAPPINESS IS: The annual "Bonehead of the Year Trophy" will go to the now non-existent American Football League. Lamar Hunt, founder of the AFL and owner of the world champion Kansas City Chief will accept the award Friday from the Dallas Bonehead Club.

Wednesday, Jan. 21, 1970 DALLAS TIMES HERALD

Bonehead Club Turns Needle On the AFL

The annual "Bonehead of the Year Trophy" will go to the now non existent American Football League. Lamar Hunt, founder of the AFL and owner of the world champion Kansas City Chiefs, will accept the award Friday from the Dallas Bonehead Club. The trophy is being presented to the AFL for their "bonehead stunt" of paying the National Football League $18 million for "the rather dubious privilege of joining a bunch of losers," officials said. Runners~up in the balloting included Mike Clark of the Dallas Cowboys, who whiffed an onside kick in the NFL Eastern Conference playoff against Cleveland; Joe Pattern and his Penn State bowl choosing committee; and the extravagant Super Bowl half-time "flop".

Saturday, Jan. 24, 1970

This year's Bonehead, Lamar Hunt '"Lamar Hunt, founder of the American Football League and owner of the world champion Kansas City Chiefs, is shown with the Bonehead of the Year Trophy presented by the AFL by the Dallas Bonehead Club. The AFL was awarded the trophy for "paying the NFL $18 million for the rather dubious privilege of joining a bunch of losers."

1970

The Dallas Morning News

Tuesday, Jan. 1971

DALLAS TIMES HERALD

Boneheads Pick Saints' Kicker The Dallas Bonehead Club will present its annual "Bonehead of the Year Trophy" award Friday noon to Tom Dempsey, the New Orleans Saints' place kicker for his 63-yard bonehead kick that booted the Saints out of getting pro football's No. 1 draft pick. Dempsey's record-shattering kick beat Detroit and that victory dropped the Saints behind the Boston Patriots in the National Football League draft as only the second worst team in the 26-team league. The club, which annually presents a beautiful walnut and silver trophy topped by a large silver nut, said Dempsey won out by a narrow margin over these other nominees: The University of Texas scouts for their analysis of Notre Dame prior to the Cotton Bowl. George Blanda, the Oakland quarterback-kicker who doesn't seem to know he's too old to be running around with a bunch of kids half his age, and mostly because he does it so well. And, Jimmy, "The Greek" Snyder, the Las Vegas oddsmaker and the 1969 winner, for his consistently wrong Super Bowl predictions. The Bonehead trophy was first presented in 1954 to the Naval Academy football team and since then to Jim "Wrong Way" Marshall of the Minnesota Vikings, the National Broadcasting Company, the Kansas City Chiefs, Texas A&M and to the American Football League. Dempsey and Snyder definitely will be on hand for the occasion and Blanda is trying to work out a conflict so he can make it.

1971

* Brings you the rest of the news ･･･ Las Vegas' Jimmy (The Greek) Snyder once again shows up for the Dallas Bonehead Club awards day Friday-which goes this time to Tom Dempsey of the New Orleans Saints, for kicking a 63-yard field goal, Which kept his team from finishing in the cellar, which in turn kept them from the rights to a number-one draft pick, Snyder is a consistently high finisher in the Bonehead judging due to an apparently unbreakable habit of picking the Cowboys to win in the playoffs . ..

DICK HITT * ･･

The Dallas Morning News

Sam Blair

WednesdayFeb. 10, 1971

Biggest Boot

And the winner is: ……. THE BONEHEAD CLUB’S Man of the Year, New Orleans kicker Tom Dempsey, registered only the second longest field goal of 1970 with his NFL record 63 -yarder. A 5’- 6”, 180-pound schoolboy in Salt lake City, Ross Caputo, kicked a 64-yarder with a tremendous wind at his back. His coach called for the kick on the theory that the ball might be downed near the opponent’s goal line rather than risk a punt carrying into the end zone. He watched in amazement as the ball sailed long and true and his team won, 3-0.

1971Boneheads Pick Four

Jimmy (The Greek) Snyder, Tom Dempsey, University of Texas opponents scouts and George Blanda have been nominated for the "Bonehead of the Year" award given annually by the Dallas Bonehead Club. Nominations were based on the following reasons: Snyder, Las Vegas bookmaker: for his very consistently inconsistent, rightfully wrong Super Bowl predictions. Tom Dempsey, New Orleans kicker: For booting the Saints out of their No. 1 draft choice with a record 63-yard field goal. Texas scouts: for their analysis of Notre Dame. George Blanda, Oakland Raiders quarterback-kicker: for not knowing that he is too old for throwing passes and running around with a bunch of young kids Lamar Hunt, last year's winner, will present the trophy to this year's winner -- to be announced January, 22nd at the awards banquet in The Terrace Room of the Baker Hotel at noon.

1971

THE DALLAS TIMES HERALD SPORTS Friday, Jan.. 22, 1971 Vikings Early Super Bowl Choice By STEVE PERKINS Jimmy The Greek Snyder, undaunted soul, was consecutively honored by the Bonehead Club Friday --despite the fact that he just about called the recent Super Bowl game on the nose. "I had it even for the betting line, and it stayed a point or two that way to game time," Snyder said. "but my newsletter had Baltimore by three - and you can't get any closer than that." SNYDER SAYS he has given up on educating the public about, the difference between setting all opening betting line and "picking" the winner. One is for betting purposes, to balance the book" with equal bets on each side of the line. The other, the personal pick, is a guide to Snyder's newsletter subscribers on which way to go. Snyder was in town Thursday night to be honored guest at Ulyssess Vlamides' party in the latter's private club at the Majestic Steak House. Snyder's correct handle is Synodopolous, so the reception was apt. HE IMMEDIATELY complied by looking ahead at the 1911 season, and labeling the Minnesota Vikings the 6-1 favorite to win the next Super Bowl. He lumped Dallas with Oakland, San Francisco, LA Rams and KC Chiefs as 8-1 shots. "How do you know Andrie, Lilly, Pugh and Cole are going to do the same job?" Snyder said. The oddsmaker feels that the Cowboy front four is the key to continued Dallas success. The Bonehead Club was to honor Friday its top awardee, New Orleans' place-kicker Tom Dempsey, for his 63-yard field goal which defeated Detroit in the last seconds. The Bonehead point of view is that Dempsey's kick deprived the Saints of the first pick in the upcoming draft, which is expected to be quarterback Jim Plunkett of Stanford. If Dempsey's kick had missed, New Orleans would have had the worst record in the NFL and Boston would have had to pick second. Also to be honored in absentia was Oakland rub quarterback George Blanda for playing beyond the years any human would reasonably expect to play.

Bonehead Football Team Has Never Lost A Game

Bonehead University is proud of their athletic department. In fact one amazing fact that is that many times overlooked by the sporting public, is that The Bonehead University football team, headed and coached Dr. Layton Bailey, Sr.and Dr. Reed May is the only team with record better than the Miami Dolphins. This wonderful collection of exceptional athletes have gone unbeaten and untied since 1919. (Of course it must he pointed out that they have never played a game either.)

Pictured from left: Tom Dempsey, returning the trophy he won in 1971 for his “Bonehead Play of the Year”, Program Chairman Brad Angers, Mickey Mantle, who was chosen by President Nixon to receive the 1972 award in his behalf, Texas Governor Preston Smith and Program Co-Chairman, Ed Daugherty.

Saturday, January 15, 1972 The Dallas Morning News

For No. 1 Bonehead 1972

Mick Pinch Hits President Nixon was busy getting his BankAmericard reprinted in Chinese, so he couldn't make it. And he would have sent Vice-President Agnew in his place. but he was afraid Spiro might drop the thing on somebody's foot. And the White House sure couldn't afford to damage any more feelings in Dallas. So by special Presidential appointment, Mickey Mantle, a man with good hands and an uncommitted block of votes, accepted the Bonehead of the year Award for Mr. Nixon Friday at the Baker Hotel. It was the annual Bonehead Club of Dallas luncheon foolishness, of course, at which the chief business of the day was to honor, or dishonor, The President for his now famous telephone call to Miami coach Don Shula. You know, the one during which he suggested a Paul Warfield pass pattern he thought could help the Dolphins beat the Cowboys in Sunday's Super Bowl. The President was in first-class Bonehead company, Previous awards have recognized such illustrious boneheads a Jim (Wrong-way) Marshall, Jimmy (The Greek) Snyder, Lamar Hunt, and last year New Orleans place-kicker Tom Dempsey for his record 63-yard field goal which cost the Saints the NFL's No. 1 draft choice, Jim Plunkett. The President accepted the award by telegram in the same fun spirit with which it was awarded. But it was left for comedians Teter and McDonald, guest MC's, to bring one of the program's top laughs. Teter, mimicking The President's voice on an imaginary telephone call, told the audience he was making up for the play he had given Shula by a special appointment to a Dallas Cowboy. He was appointing Duane Thomas Honorary, President of the Silent Majority,

1972

The Dallas Morning News Dallas, Texas, Thursday, January 13, 1972

Nixon Announces Acceptance President Nixon will run his down-and-in pattern after all, and it'll be in the general direction of the Dallas Boneheads. Nixon has been in touch with Bonehead officials. the group announced Wednesday. and has said he will accept the "Bonehead of the Year" award In the spirit in which if was given. Nixon. who won the award for offering the Miami Dolphins his own hand-designed play for use against Dallas in the Super Bowl. is said to be contacting a person of his choice to receive the silver nut trophy In Dallas. A formal statement will be issued from Washington Thursday.

Boneheads HonorFootballer Nixon

The Dallas Bonehead Club, which has previously honored such dignitaries as Jimmy "The Greek" Snyder, NBC and Jim "Wrong-way" Marshall, Monday named President Richard M. Nixon as "Bonehead of the Year" for his recent involvement in professional football. The club informed Nixon by telegram inviting him to presentation ceremonies Jan. 14. The President was assured his name "along with other sports great" would be permanently enshrined upon the walnut and silver trophy adorned with a great silver nut. But the Bonehead Club's "sports greats" all have fallen by the wayside. Nixon on apparently won the award by first picking the Washington redskins to defeat the Dallas Cowboys during a regular season game and, after Dallas won, picking the Miami Dolphins over Dallas in the Super Bowl Sunday. He also suggested by phone to Miami coach Don Shula a play he thought would work against the Cowboys. He was yet to call the Dallas coaching staff. "You, Mr. President," the telegram said, ”….as America’s No. 1 football fan, understandably could not control your emotions. Whereas, without considering the options, you let your heart rule your better judgment and remembering Custer, picked the Redskins to whip the Cowboys. Still undaunted, you set out to become a coach, for the Miami Dolphins. The award which we bestow upon you at this time is not to 'laugh at you, but to let the world know that you have learned to laugh with us."

Nixon Makes No Bones About Accepting Award

DALLAS, Jan. 14 (UPI)- President Nixon today accepted the Bonehead of the Year award "in the spirit in which it is given ... in good humor." Nixon was awarded the trophy by the Bonehead Club of Dallas for his backing of the Washington Redskins against the Dallas Cowboys during the regular National Football League season, and for sending a play to the Miami Dolphins' coach, Don Shula. The Bonehead Club is a group of Dallas businessmen that each year honors some person connected with the sports world at a dinner. The honor is meant in fun, and is usually accepted that way.

1972

An additional scouting report on the Cow-boys was provided by the President, who phoned Miami Coach Shula at 1:30 a.m. to suggest that Warfield should run a down-and-in pass pattern against Dallas. His previous suggestion, a flanker reverse for the Redskins, lost 13 yards.

LIFE

President's Super BowlBeau Geste

DALLAS - (UPI) - President Nixon says he feels so good about receiving the "Bonehead of the Year" award that he is going to give Dallas football Tom Landry his playbook for the Super Bowl. Nixon received the trophy from the Bonehead Club of Dallas for backing the Washington - Redskin against the Cowboys during the regular season and for sending a play to Miami Dolphins' coach Don Shula, "To properly express my appreciation for this singular tribute I have decided to make the ultimate gesture," Nixon said in a telegram yesterday, "You will be pleased to hear that for the Super Bowl, I have offered Tom Landry my complete playbook," The President gave the Redskins a play for their game against the 49er"s, It was a reverse that lost 13 yards. Landry had a bad connection with President Nixon, but reported that the No. I fan was "very cordial. He singled out our offensive line especially, It impressed him a great deal-and me, too," He said Nixon didn't mention the down-and-in pass he had suggested Miami throw to Paul Warfield. "No," Landry grinned, "when your down and ins aren't working, you don't say anything about them."

1972President Nixon Retires From Coaching

President Richard M. Nixon, winner of the 1972 Bonehead Of The Year Award, retired from the thankless task of coaching and play calling for the Washington Redskins and Miami Dolphins. The President may have slipped a few plays to George Allen prior to the Dallas game but decided to let George go it alone in The Super Bowl. The Redskins seemed to miss his calls and seemed to lose spirit without big expertise. Coaching is a demanding chore and with all the other decisions that a person in his position has to make, one has to draw the line someplace. Now that the president has become the nation's number one football FAN, he faces the problems that have faced other fans for years. The football blackout. His position was even more) frustrating than most. Would you believe his home at Camp David is under the Washington blackout, his Florida retreat at Biscayne is under the Miami blackout and his home in San Clemente is under the Super Bowl blackout. Is it any wonder the President had words with Commissioner Rozelle?

One fact stands out though, Mr. Nixon, be he President of the United States or just another football fan. showed -- that he is human and a person with a good sense of humor in hill manner of accepting last year's "Bonehead Of The Year" award. The entire Bonehead Club wishes to express its thanks, for his attitude and we are proud that our trophy will forever carry his name on the silver plate honoring his contribution to "Boneheadism".

Governor Unveils His "Ben Barnes Defense" DALLAS (AP) - Gov. Preston Smith said today he does not know why President Nixon wants to be a football coach. "he's already a Republican and that's enough trouble for most people" Smith addressed the Dallas bonehead Club, which recently voted a Bonehead award to the President for suggesting a play to Miami coach Don Shula, whose Dolphins play the Dallas Cowboys in the Super Bowl in New Orleans Sunday. Smith said Nixon made himself "a volunteer offensive coach for Miami. some Cowboys fans may add the word 'very offensive'. "His game plan seems to be clicking a little better with John Connally in the lineup," Smith said, "Funny thing about that Connally had never been noted before as a blocking back.” John Connally, former governor of Texas, is a longtime political foe of Smith. Smith sent a play to Cowboy coach Tom Landry, also a defense, which he now calls "my Ben Barnes Defense." Lt. Gov. Ben Barnes, 33, is running against Smith, 59, in the Democratic gubernatorial primary this year. Smith described the defense: "You just hold your ground and let the young upstarts defeat themselves.”

Sunday. January 16. 1972 LAS VEGAS SUN

NEW ORLEANS --- - To President Nixon I say. "Welcome to the club," for being the recipient of a Bonehead of the Year Award. I won the Bonehead for making Super Bowl odds that had Baltimore 17 over the Jets in 1969. I may be headed for another Bonehead myself this year., but here's the breakdown on why I rate the Cowboys six points over the Dolphins for Super Bowl VI - Normally, the Cowboys would receive the one point for Intangibles on the basis of their experience. But the Dolphins this year are to football what the Mets were to baseball when they upset Baltimore in the World Series That's why I awarded them the intangible point. " As you, Mr. President the Dallas Bonehead Club might have wanted see how your slant pass play In Warfield works out In the Super Bowl.

Paul Crume's

Big D

GOV. PRESTON SMITH attended that Bonehead Club luncheon during the week where President Nixon was presented the Bonehead of the Year award for his colossal ignoring of Cowboy superiority. As everybody knows, Gov. Smith is a Democrat. During the meeting, Ralph Curry was introduced to the governor as the republican nominee for governor back in the Eisenhower days. "Yes, Governor," said Curry, a true Bonehead if there ever was one, "and if it hadn't been for those Democrats, I would have been governor." Said Gov. Smith. the Democrat: "That's the same group that has been giving me a little bit of trouble this year."

1972

From James Collins, US Congressman

Nixon Gets Top Coach Aide Title

President Nixon is getting another jab from Dallas for his advice to the Miami Dolphins on football strategy. On the heels of the Dallas Bonehead Club award, Dallas City Council members are sending an “award” to the President. Though not made a part of the official city records, Mayor Wes Wise and members of the City Council signed a document giving Nixon “a special award for outstanding assistance to Dallas Cowboys football fans through the giving of advice to that “other team’” and naming Nixon “assistant coach of the year.” “I hope he takes this in the right spirit,” commented Wise as he signed the Jesse Price - Proposed award.

MEMPHIS, SATURDAY MORNING, JANUARY 15, 1972 Nixon Shares Dallas Humor

DALLAS. Jan. 14. - (UPI) - President Nixon Friday accepted the bonehead-of-the-year award "in the spirit in which it is given ... in good humor." Nixon was awarded the trophy by the Bonehead Club of Dallas for his backing of the Washington Redskins against the Dallas Cowboys during the regular National Football League season, and for sending a play to Miami coach Don Shula. The Bonehead Club is a group of Dallas businessmen. that each year honors some person connected with the sports world. Former New York Yankee star Mickey Mantle, who lives at Dallas, accepted the award for Nixon and read a crowd of 250 persons a telegram sent the zany organization. "To my fellow sports fans and admirers of the Dallas Cowboys, I send my warmest, but thoroughly impartial greetings," the President's telegram said. "To properly express my appreciation for this singular tribute I have decided to make the ultimate gesture. and you will be pleased to hear that for the Super Bowl, I have offered (Dallas Coach) Tom Landry my complete playbook."

1972

1972

THE DENVER POST Sunday, Jan. 16, 1972

Nixon Offers‘Play Book’

DALLAS, Tex. -- (AP) -- President Nixon late, Friday promised Dallas Cowboy Coach Tom Landry his “complete play book” for Super bowl VI in New Orleans Sunday. The President made the offer in a telegram while accepting good naturedly the Dallas Bonehead Club’s annual a bonehead-of-the-year award. Nixon got the honor for sending Coach Don Shula of the Miami Dolphins a play to use against Dallas in Sunday’s Super Bowl in New Orleans. Baseball great Mickey Mantle accepted the award for the President. The President also received some kidding from Gov. Preston Smith at the Boneheads’ annual award banquet.

Last year’s bonehead award went to Tom Dempsey of the New Orleans Saints for kicking a record 62-yard field goal that beat Detroit. If Dempssy hadn’t kicked that field goal, the Boneheads explained, New Orleans would have received the first pick in the collegiate draft.

DALLAS TIMES HERALD Boneheads Cite President For Football Predictions

President Nixon has done it again. He has been picked "Bonehead of the Year" by the Dallas Bonehead Club. The annual "Bonehead of the Year" trophy will be presented Friday during giddy noon ceremonies in the Baker Hotel's Texas Room. It is doubtful President Nixon will show up up for the ceremony. He was informed of the award in a telegram sent to the White House over the weekend. The telegram read in part: The "Bonehead of the Year" trophy is presented each year to persons or institutions that have endeared themselves to the sports-minded public by their desire to participate and lose. There are many trophies awarded each year to persons who have won, but ours is the only trophy dedicated to honoring those who fall by the wayside. You, Mr. President, as America's No. 1 football! fan understandably could not control your emotions. Whereas, without considering the options, you let your heart rule your better judgment and, remembering Custer, picked the Redskins to whip the Cowboys. Still undaunted, you set out to become a coach for the Miami Dolphins. The award which we bestow upon you at this time is not to laugh at you, but to let the world know that you have learned to laugh with us. May you always have the ability to stir the sporting public's emotions, and we will always recognize you as America's No.1 sports fan.

1972“This is an honor I would truly like to share with anybody else, and I am especially grateful it is presented only once a year,” Nixon said in the telegram. “To properly express my appreciation for this singular tribute” the President’s message continued, “I have decided to make the ultimate gesture, and you will be pleased to learn that for the Super bowl VI have offered Tom Landry my complete play book.”

Monday, January 17, 1972

The Dallas Morning News

THANKS, MR. PRESIDENT: Tom Landrychats with a “new” friend from

Pennsylvania Ave.

Ralph "Shug" Jordan1973 Bonehead of the

YearBy .JIM RODEN.~, Sports Writer, The Dallas times Herald It's a good thing for Auburn that Shug Jordan doesn't go a long with the crowd. Otherwise, the Tiger's might not have become the surprise team of the college football world in 1972. When the football experts looked at Auburn's chances, they decreed a dismal finish for the Tigers. No way Jordan's team could come close to matching the sparkling 9-2 mark of the previous season, they said. After ail, hadn't Auburn lost its brilliant offensive punch of Heisman Trophy winner Pat Sullivan passing to wide receiver Terry Beasley? To replace Sullivan at quarterback, Jordan had to insert Randy Walls, a little known sophomore who was so nervous in his .. first starting assignment against Mississippi State that he went out for warm-ups with his jersey on backwards. As a passer, Walls wasn't even considered in the same league with Sullivan. But Jordan obviously is a man who can adapt. So he didn't have a proven passer. But he did have a tremendous runner in tailback Terry Henley. He just reconstructed his offense into a running game. While the guessperts were predicting all, sorts of dire things for the Tigers, Jordan, starting his 22nd season as head coach at his alma mater, had the audacity to say that his team was going to surprise a few folks. When he looked at the season before him, Jordan said,

"With all due respect to our opponents, and realizing it will take a superb effort on the part of all the players and coaches, we are not conceding anything." So the Tigers, who were picked to finish in the second division of their own Southeastern Conference, set out to prove their point. They opened with a 14-3 win over Mississippi State, then had to struggle to get past weak Tennessee - Chattanooga, 14-7 and everybody was ready to write the Tigers off. Next up was a Tennessee team rated highly in the nation and that's when the Tigers began to make people look in their direction. With a superb defense and a fine rushing performance by Henley, Auburn knocked off the Vols, 10-6. Next came an upset win over Mississippi, 19-13. A visit to the Tigers' den at LSU brought a disastrous 35-1 defeat but a spectacular fourth quarter rally the next week earned a 24-14 win over Georgia Tech followed by wins over Florida State, 27-14: Florida, 26-20; and Georgia, 27-10.

Then it was the big one, the state championship game of Alabama with Jordan sending his Tigers against Bear Bryant's Crimson Tide of Alabama. The Tide was ranked second in the nation and already had clinched the SEC crown. Bama carried a 16-0 lead into the final period. At that point, it seemed more a case of the tigers just being able to keep the score respectable. In the last five and a half minutes the Tigers turned in two stunning plays by blocking a pair of Alabama punts and winning the game, 17-16. A bid to the Gator Bowl already had been accepted but the Tiers were 11-point underdogs to Colorado of the Big Eight Conference. Another brilliant show and the Tigers pulled a 24-3 upset from their bag of tricks. After it was over, Colorado coach Eddie Crowder said, "I admire Auburn as much as any team that I can remember. Auburn is a team totally dedicated, totally disciplined, totally motivated. They are a tribute to a great coaching job, especially by the staff and particularly by Shug Jordan. Ralph Jordan, who got his nickname Shug because of his love for sugar cane when he was a youngster growing up in Alabama has a record of 156 wins, 69 losses and five ties since taking over at head coach at Auburn in 1951. He has had to overcome many obstacles in his career, including a winning flight with cancer a few years ago. He took over at Auburn when winning was almost a forgotten word, guiding the Tigers to a 5-5 mark his first season after an 0-10 record the year before he arrived. Since that time he has seen his team win a national championship, an SEC title and go the nine bowl games. For taking a team that was barely favored to win more than one game and guiding it to a 10-1 record, Shug Jordan's insistence that the prognosticators were incorrect has been rewarded. He is the “Bonehead of the Year.”

1973

A Shug from the Gov.

Boneheads To Honor No-Shows

New Orleans trumpeter AI Hirt will accept this year's Bonehead of the Year award on behalf of more than a million pro football fans who bought game tickets but never showed up for the games, the Dallas Bonehead Club announced Tuesday. Hirt was selected to accept the award because he, the club said, is the fan-of-fans. The presentation will be made at noon Friday in the Grand Ballroom of Holiday Inn Central during a banquet attended by movie actress Ruta Lee, singer Frankie Lane, Jimmy 'The Greek' Snyder and other celebrities and former recipients of the award.

1974

1975 1976

In 1974 The Bonehead of the Year trophy was sent to Al Hirt in New Orleans, where it resided in his club for almost a year. When he was contacted in 1975 about returning it for representation to a new winner, We were told that it had disappeared. No trace was ever found. In 1976 Dr. Brad Angers & Dr. George Bushong contacted art classes at S.M.U. and had a three dimensional Bonehead emblem made. The metal working class made us several copies to be used on award plaques. It became the new Bonehead of the Year symbol.

1977The Dallas Morning News Saturday, February 5,1977

Bonehead Coors may lead pack

By AL ALTWEGG Business Editor of the News They laughed when Bill Coors arrived in Dallas to accept the Bonehead of the Year award for his company’s new pop-top beer can opener that many people find difficult to operate. But Bill Coors may have had the last laugh - because, after all, Coors is still selling all the Coors beer there is. His public relations department was aghast and appalled when it heard that he'd accepted the invitation to visit Dallas and accept the Bonehead of the Year honor, according to William K. Coors, President and Board Chairman of the Adolph Coors Co of Golden, Colo. Similarly, Raymond Willie .Ir .. President of Willowbrook Inc., the nation's largest Coors beer distributor serving the greater Dallas beer market. says he was opposed to the whole idea when Brad Angers of the Dallas Bonehead Club proposed it. But Bill Coors liked the idea. And, In the final analysis, he's the boss. What's more, he says he's more of an engineer and production man and not a marketing man for Coors. but he knew. why he wanted to come to Dallas. What it came down to was that he thought he and the Coors company were right, and he thought the Bonehead occasion gave him a chance to explain. TO PEOPLE WHO object to their bartender's finger getting into their beer in opening what Coors calls the two- holer, Press-Tab Two opener, Bill Coors told the Boneheads. that It just proved his beer was finger - licking good. When the Boneheads had a 4-year old chimpanzee by the name of Deena try and fail to open a Coors can, Bill Coors said that just proved that "monkeys can't open it either." Coors also suggested to the Boneheads that history has been shaped by the monumental goofs by the boneheads of the past. He cited as the Bonehead of All Time, Moses, who led his people out of bondage and turned left instead of right. If he had just turned right, "guess who would' have had all that oil." He cited the inventor of Indoor plumbing who is responsible for our water pollution problems. He cited the Inventor of the automobile who gave us today's oil problem and air pollution problem - but the alternative, he noted, would have been "something like 5 billion horses." (The one-holer. Press-Tap One. had to be replaced because some ingenious soul discovered that two of the circles from it could be glued together and used as a dime on coin-operated machines. The Treasury demanded that Coors stop its counterfeiting.) Furthermore, Coors said his company had done surveys and found an overwhelming public support for something like mandatory deposits on beverage containers. Frankly, Coors is adamantly opposed to the returnable bottle, which environmentalists and originally the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) were urging. Coors research has convinced the EPA to do a 18O-degree turn on the matter; now the EPA sees that the aluminum can is better, Bill Coors says.

But "there's a ground swell of public opinion" in favor of the mandatory deposit, Coors says. "We had to demonstrate that the aluminum can is preferable, before the bottle bills got passed. "The industry can live with the mandatory deposit." Coors admitted, "but it can't live with the returnable bottle. Asked pointblank whether' he favored or was opposed to the mandatory deposit, Bill Coors was reluctant to answer. But then he manfully faced up to the question, . "I feel that in the best interests of our society it's going to be enacted. It's not in the best interests of our industry. The problem lies with the retailers." The returnable bottle would create monumental problems for retailers. he pointed out. "It's coming. It's inevitable. We're going to have to face up to it," Bill Coors said, And he argues that the aluminum can with a non-removable opener would take the burden off the retailers, ASKED IF SOME people's displeasure with Press-Top Two - which be claims can be opened easily and with almost anything, by rolling a golf ball over the top, by pushing down on the opening with a knife handle, a spoon, "almost anything, the corner of this desk" - had caused economic trouble for Adolph Coors Co., Bill Coors quoted some figures he got from the Dallas distributor. Willowbrook. Last year, Willowbrook sold 45 per cent of the Dallas beer market - 6,7OO,OOO cases of Coors beer, Last November, the first full month after introduction of Press-Tab Two, Willowbrook. sold 47 per cent of the canned beer market here. And in December that rose to 49.2 per cent. "Don't misunderstand me, we've lost some good customers," Bill Coors said, in his frank and disarming way. "But it isn't putting us out of business," he added, smiling. The Bonehead of the Year may still have the last laugh.

19781978 DALLAS TIMES HERALD Sunday,January 29, 1978

Dick Hitt

Pots and Kettles The BONEHEAD CLUB of Dallas has announced, on a fairly slow Metroplex news day. that it has completed its nominations for the 1978 Bonehead of the Year Awards., "this award is made each year to a person or group that has committed an act or participated to an event which, in the eyes of the Boneheads, is a monumental goof," they said. This year's nominations were: Bert Lance, for blowing a job as director of a deficit budget nation when he proved he was "overqualified. Consolidated Edison of New York, for trying to prove that "Blackout can be beautiful". General Motors, Oldsmobile, Division, for trying to beat out Mazda in the 'rotating engine race'. The United States Congress, for finding itself up a Panama creek without a paddle. "Striking Farmers (American Agriculture Movement) for setting a world-record for no-shows at Texas Stadium, and asking for 100 per cent parity, whatever that is. "Billy Carter, for improving the image of the typical service station attendant, "AnIta Bryant, for trying to prove that gay does not mean happy. "David Frost (Nixon interviews), for taking eight hours to fill in an 18-minute gap. and succeeding only in creating an 8 hour and 18 minute gap." The winners of the Clubs “Bonehead of the Year” award are "Striking Farmers (American Agriculture Movement) They will become the 13th winner of the award, joining such ranks as the U.S. Naval Academy, Jim (Wrong-Way) Marshall, Texas 'A&M University, The National Broadcasting Co., Lamar Hunt, Jimmy the Greek Snyder, the American football League, Tom Dempsey; President Richard M. Nixon, Ralph (Shug) Jordan, AI Hirt, and last year's winner, Bill Coors of the Coors Brewery.

The interesting thing about this year's Bonehead of the Year nominations, at least in the view of some of us Bonehead analysts and observers, is that there's nobody from sports on the list. . A cursory glance will show, which is a phrase we analysts like to use to point out something very obvious, that nearly an of the previous winners were honored because of some gaffe on the grid- iron. (Navy's award was for bringing Its team to the Cotton Bowl to show that it, not Texas, was number 1 in the nation. Texas beat Navy and its quarterback, Roger Staubach, 28-6.) . (That kind of thinking, by the way, explains why Notre Dame is not on this year's list of nominees.) Nixon's award was for something he did about football. NBC's was for interrupting a cliffhanger football game with the movie Heidi. So far as my analytical cursory glance can tell, the only non- athlete goof was the one by Mr. Coors, who fathered the pernicious beer-tab opener that got 90 many complaints it was abandoned. I am not sure that this salute for boneheadery was' too richly deserved, since Coors got about $9 million worth of free advertising over the brewhaha.. And it fostered a new sub-industry, making plastic punch openers especially for the unopenable Coors cans. SPEAKING AS A Bonehead analyst, I think it is encouraging that the Bonehead Club of Dallas is raising its sights and is tackling viable politico/socio/economic goofs on a national scale. Of course, the Boneheads had an assortment of bonehead stunts to choose from, starting on the city county level, moving up to state and then on to the national scene, which is a klutz encounter of the third kind. At the risk of offending local connoisseurs of the screw up. who hold that 'our boneheads in the Metroplex are competitive in style and degree with anybody nationally, some even what the soccer people call World Class, I suspect (as a Bonehead analyst) that the Boneheads found some (laws in the local miscreants. I have learned from a source high up on the Bonehead judging panel that the County Commissioners were disqualified from competition by the expedient of calling a special meeting to pass a proclamation that they had committed no boner's last year. Commissioners Pickett and Tyson were absent and Commissioner Orr abstained to take it under advisement. The fact Is that the winner of the Possibly Annual Hitt Pre-Bonehead Award. Bonehead Award is the Bonehead Club of Dallas for ignoring the biggest, most-talked-about, most vital relevant and ultimately fateful crisis for the survival of our society as we know it: the NFL Officials' controversy. So in the year when a sports goof was the year's best, the boneheads decided to abandon sports. Maybe they know something I don’t. At Ieast if Bert Lance wins" I hope they'll change the reason to "Double-dribbling."

American Agriculture Movement wins 1978Bonehead of the Year

Award

By SHEILA R. TAYLOR

THE PASSENGERS LEAVING the plane looked surprised when they saw the waiting photographers at the ramp's end. "Who're you guys waiting for?" they asked. "Who was on our plane?" "Andrea Weitman." "Oh. Uh. _ . Who's Andrea Weitman? What'd she do?" Andrea" Andy" Weitman, 13, of Wantagh, New York, became the first female recipient of the Dallas Bonehead Club's Bonehead of the Year award by being the first girl Boy Scout. No crusading feminist. Andrea joined the Cub Scouts when her Girl Scout troop disbanded. After winning II of 13 possible achievement awards and reaching the mandatory retirement age of 11, she discovered Cub Scouts don't take girls. Helen, Andrea's mom, pointed out that had the family been publicity-seekers, they would have notified the press at the time of Andrea's induction. "I Just joined to have fun," Andrea said repeatedly. "If my Girl Scout troop had remained active, I would have stayed with them. But they didn't, and I knew the Cub Scouts were really doing fun things." SHE WAS FAMILIAR with the Cub Scout program because her dad, Paul. was a pack master, and she has three older brothers who'd been through the scout program. Now, one's a doctor, one II dentist, one a law student, and Andrea was Cinderella for the weekend. As soon as Bonehead program chairman Bradford Angers presented her with an enormous box of candy. Andrea was taken to the American Airlines VIP room for interviews and pictures, placed in a Lincoln Continental with her name on the side, and shuttled off to the Sheraton Hotel. A disbelieving porter tried to install Andrea and her parents in the same luxurious room, but it was not to be. Andy was to have her own luxurious room next to her parents, Waiting in the room were pyramids of fruit and a map-of- Texas praline from Neiman's. "With three older brothers, Andy and her identity problems should be taken care of by all this attention," said mama Helen, a social worker. Andy kept saying, "I can't believe all this," while papa Paul just shook his head at Angers, saying "You guys are crazy!" The Weitmans were given five or ten minutes to relax in their rooms, then they were off to Luskey's Western Wear for a complete outfit of Dallas duds for Andrea; white shirt with red and while checked yoke, jeans, Resistol hat, patchwork Larry Mahan boots, and an initialed belt buckle, The tiny Andrea looked trim and Texan, as she bravely kept right on smiling through the afternoon of attention. Only occasionally did she cast apprehensive looks across her shoulder at her mother.

After being outfitted, she and her parents were hoisted back across town to the Old Spaghetti Warehouse for a press party. On Friday, the Bonehead Club honored her at a luncheon at the Lakewood Country Club, where she was made an honorary Texan, Her Saturday schedule included a helicopter ride, a tour of a private art collection and dinner at Southern Kitchen. Andrea was home alone when the initial phone call from Angers came, informing her of her nomination for the Bonehead of the Year award. Being a smart young woman, she Immediately assumed it was a crank call, just as she did the second call. Only when Angers made call number three and talked with her father, did the Weitmans begin to take the "honor" seriously. ANDREA FACED stiff competition. Other nominations this year included Harold Stassen because he announced his ninth try for the presidency, An unjust nomination. Back home, we call that perseverance. But, as Angers pointed out, if Stassen had won the honor, he would have been unprepared. He's never made an acceptance speech. Dolly Parton was considered because she turned the 1978 Country Music Association Awards into "a real bust." Nonsense, again. dolly and her sense of humor made the Awards worth watching for the first time in history. Well, maybe not her sense of humor alone, but as Angers said. "We couldn't think of a tasteful way to treat a ceremony honoring Dolly, and the Bonehead Club is a tasteful club."

1979As, her mother looks on, Andrea Weitman, 13, receives the Dallas Bonehead

Club’s “Bonehead of the Year award from Bonehead members Bradford Angers (left) and Bill Wray for being the first girl Boy Scout. Andrea’s competition included Dolly Parton, Mickey Rooney, President Carter and Jimmy the Greek, among others.

1979 Nominee Mickey Rooney was cited because he married for the eighth time, but who is the Bonehead Club to designate this a boner? Likely. the wives are getting better and better. Only Mickey knows for sure. Jimmy "The Greek" Snyder was nominated because "he seems to try to stay on our list by constantly underestimating the Dallas Cowboys". Big deal. Others habitually underestimate the Cowboys without qualifying for the Bonehead award. Sen. WIlliam Proxmlre's nomination should be In question. too, After establishing the Golden Fleece awards for the government agencies that misuse the taxpayers money for frivolous purposes, Sen. ProxmIre was nominated because "he somehow always overlooks himself." This isn't "boneheadery" - this Is common sense in a politician running for reelection. Alfred E. Kahn, advisor to the President on inflation, was suggested because he gave the world a new word for "depression" when he decided it would be called "banana," . President Carter was nominated because "since taking office he has not made a mistake, mistake, mistake," How easy to pick on the president - a banality matched only by the Bonehead's previous award to everyone's favorite bonehead, Richard M. Nixon. Cleveland's Mayor Dennis Kucinich was nominated for "being for the wrong office at the wrong time," but when is the nighttime for being mayor of Cleveland? When Is the right time for being in Cleveland? Well, you can see the stiff competition Andrea faced. From a public relations standpoint, the Bonehead Club couldn't have found a more appealing winner. Articulate, poised and yes. cute, Andrea's quickly framed fame has not yet gone to her head, nor to her parents'. who seemed to be having as much fun as she. Maybe more, ANDREA'S SCOUTING experience came to public attention when she read of a girl in a neighboring town who had flied suit seeking membership In the Boy Scouts. '" I tried to call her and tell her I had already been in the Scouts for two years and to encourage her, but I couldn't find her number, so I wrote a letter to the editor" The letter resulted In front page coverage in Newsday and The New York Daily News.

The Weitmans, strong proponents of the Scouting family, should be trotted out by the Scouts as often as possible: instead, Scout officials seem embarrassed by the whole thing, refusing to appear on television with her, and more or less denying that the Impossible was possible: For two years, Pack 330 of Wantagh. New York. had a girl Boy Scout. According to her father and scout master Paul. the boys in the troop became better scouts because, of . Andrea's presence, "They weren't about to let a girl be better than they were, so everyone tried harder." he said, Andrea giggled for the seventeenth time and again emphasized, "I just Joined to have a good time. I wasn't trying to prove anything, and loved every minute of It!" SHE HOPES to be a lawyer. but when asked If she'd like to try cases representing other girls trying to Join men-only organizations, she said. "I hope I'll have more interesting cases than that. Anyway. I hope those problems will be all over by then." Maybe her weekend as Cinderella will gain enough publicity to force the Boy Scouts to rethink their policies. Andrea and the Bonehead Club have given notice that the Boy Scouts had best Be Prepared .

….Continuation of Andrea

MARYLN SCHWARTZ

No one wants to mourn the passing of this buck

The Bonehead Club of Dallas has gotten a taste of how hard it is to pass the Susan B. Anthony buck. Every year the Boneheads give an award to the person or persons whom the club feels "have messed up the most" during the past year. This year the club voted unanimously to give the prize to the U.S. Treasury Department for issuing the Susan B. Anthony dollar, a coin which frankly has been a flop. "But It's not just a matter of giving an award," says Dr. Brad Angers, Bonehead Program Chairmen” When have a big awards presentation. We have to make sure there is someone there to receive it - someone who had a hand in screwing up." It’s Dr. Angers' job to get a representative for the ceremony_ "Our first thought with the Susan B. Anthony dollar was the First Woman's Bank of New York City. When the dollar was issued, the bank was first to distribute it. They announced they were thrilled to be giving out the first coin named in honor of a woman." BUT WHEN ANGERS phoned Lynn Salvage, president of the bank. he says she would not answer his call. "Her secretary seemed very responsive until I mentioned that Susan B. Anthony dollar. Then it was like ice. I called twice a day for 4 1/2 weeks. They kept putting me off. The bank. it seems, no longer wanted to be reminded of its role in the first coin named for a woman." It was tactfully suggested Dr. Angers talk to the treasury department. "So I called Azie Taylor Morton who is a Democrat from Texas and the U.S. treasurer. She was most cordial until I said 'Susan B. Anthony dollar.' She quickly shuffled me off to Betty Anderson, the Undersecretary of the Treasury. Ms. Anderson was lovely until I once again said the magic words. I was then shifted to the public relations department. The PR people politely told me it was a rather tense and delicate subject. They said they would take no credit. They suggested that I call the U.S. Mint. The mint had done all the work." Dr. Angers then called Stella Hackell, the director of the Bureau of the Mint.

"Ms. Hackell listened to what I had to say and was very responsive. She even chuckled over the award. But she said absolutely she would not come to Dallas to accept. She planned to be in San Francisco that week. She then explained it was a most touchy subject. She said the people ought to be talking to was the congress. The congress. after all. Passed the whole thing. The mint was just carrying out orders." Dr. Angers then called Rep. Jim Collins, R-Dallas. ”REP. COLLINS SAID, 'No way.' He would not be associated with the Susan B. Anthony dollar. I called other congressmen. They said no, no, no, no. Finally, the congressmen recommended I talk to people supporting the ERA." Angers called Gloria Steinem. "Her secretary politely asked me what I wanted. I said, 'Susan B. Anthony dollar.' She said Ms. Steinem was not going to be available." They called Bella Abzug. "Ms. Abzug's secretary was very. very understanding. She listened and thought it was very amusing. But not amusing enough for Ms. Abzug to participate in any way." The secretary explained Bella was definitely not responsible for the Susan B. Anthony dollar. The secretary suggested the Boneheads call Susan B. Anthony III (the great-grandniece of Susan B. Anthony). Ms. Anthony was reached in Florida by phone. She told Angers she would not consider appearing before any group that was not at least 50 percent female and 20 percent black. "So here I was stuck without a recipient," Angers said. "I was desperate. I needed someone to represent the financial community. Finally a member suggested I call Howard J. Ruff who publishes the Ruff Times and is considered one of the country's foremost authorities on economics." ANGERS NOTED Ruff Is heavily in demand and was almost impossible to reach. "I chased his secretary from New York to Florida by phone. Finally. I reached her in Honduras, She explained she was getting ready to join her boss for some dictation. She was meeting him on a yacht somewhere in the Caribbean. She promised to deliver the invitation. A few days later. Ruff called me from Jamaica. He thought the award was very funny and very appropriate. He said he could cut short some previous engagements and be in Dallas to accept for the entire U.S. financial community" . The awards dinner will be held Friday at the Lakewood Country Club. To avoid confusion the Boneheads are not accepting Susan B. Anthony dollars in payment for the meal.

1980The Dallas Morning News

Treasury Sticks With Susan B.

By DENNIS FULTON The government just refuses to give up. It continues to preach about the Susan B. Anthony coin, saying that in the near future the new coin will take the place of the dollar bill. And the leader of that pack in Washington is Bette Anderson, undersecretary of the Treasury, and author of last summer's legislation for the Anthony dollar. Ms. Anderson was in Dallas Tuesday to speak to the Executive Women of Dallas. And she talked with the press briefly about the status of the new coin. It seems that since the coin got the government OK last summer, 760 million of them have been cranked out of the U.S. Mint. And only 240 million of those made it Into the banking system and on to the public, with the remainder still in the hands of the Treasury department - awaiting distribution. "We had been minting 80 million Anthony dollars a month. We have now cut back to 30 million a month," Ms. Anderson said, indicating that the slowdown of production was a result of the reluctance of the American public to accept the coin. The former Georgia banker said at the time of the legislation, pubic acceptance of the coin was expected to take three years. "However, we miscalculated. It is going much slower than that," Ms. Anderson said. But the government has some cards. up its sleeves - strategic maneuvers toward making the coin more readily accepted. Ms. Anderson would not reveal all the plans, but said the postal department will soon convert almost entirely to the coin. All change made will be in Anthony dollars; and stamp machines will only accept the reluctantly - accepted coin. "We will not pull the dollar bill out of circulation to force acceptance of the coin because we are a government of the people, and the people have expressed a desire to keep the bill," she said. Ms. Anderson said that her strongest tactic is to use her own reasoning power. "If I reason with people, they usually see my point," she said. "It costs 3 cents to mint an Anthony coin, and it will last 18 years. It costs 2 cents to print a one dollar bill and it lasts about 18 months. "Complete conversion to the coin would-save taxpayers $50 million a year. That's not a lot, but it's a start."

"Pre-Program Bash"

The Dallas Bonehead Club holds its annual pre-program bash in the beau-tiful, new Texas Tumbleweed at 14775 Midway Road, opened in the fall of 1980 by Jack and Steve Ray. Already famous for their steaks carefully cooked over Texas rnesquite and their live country music, the Texas Tumbleweed really outdoes itself each year when the Boneheads and members of the media are treated to champagne and fellowship under the direction of Doug Burton, the general mana-ger. A real tip-o-the-derby to some great friends of Boneheads.

1980Post office

to use Susan B.

WASHINGTON (API - Starting next month, when a postal clerk gives you a dollar in change. it'll be just that-change. The U.S. Postal Service is launch-ing a program to use the new Susan B. Anthony dollar coins in making change, replacing conventional paper money. The effort starts Feb. 1. The post office will still accept paper money. and officials stressed that paper dollars. if available. will be provided to customers who insist on them. Use of the coins is expected to be more convenient for postal clerks. officials said. and their cash drawers I have a place for the coins. The Anthony dollars. slightly larger than a quarter, were introduced by the treasury department Oct. 10, 1978, but they have not proved widely popular with the public.

The Dallas Morning News

Nelson Bunker Hunt “Shucks ... A billion dollars ain't what it used to be' anyway”

"BONEHEAD OF THE YEAR" By Laws of the Bonehead Club of Dallas Article XII, Section II (B) To be eligible to be nominated as "Bonehead of the Year" a person must, since the last "Bonehead of the Year” Awards program commit an act which as interpreted by the Boneheads, is a monumental goof. The activity or event causing the nomination may be highly meritorious in the eyes of everyone, but the Boneheads. Each prospective "Bonehead of the Year" shall be a person acknowledged by his peers as being superior at and in his trade, profession or activity out of which the event occurred, which caused his or her nomination, so that any attendant publicity will be accepted by the public as humor provoking and not detrimental. The nominee shall be a person of such intelligence that he or she, readily realizes monumental goofs occur only to people who do monumental deeds. Further, the nominee must be a person of good wit and humor, who is willing to laugh with us at our interpretation of the event.

Being on the wrong end of the world's biggest market juggling act earned the Hunts a first in Bonehead history. Never before has the Bonehead of the Year Award been split. The Hunts shrugged at the losses in typical Texas style. "A billion dollars ain't what it used to be anyway," Bunker was heard to say. Herbert told Fortune Magazine he felt like the lady who lost her purse to a mugger, and then was arrested for indecent exposure because..her clothes were tom off in the fight. As the magazine pointed out, some of the governors of the New York Commodity Exchange were in the silver market on the short side, and when they changed the rules to force down the price, they made money. Much of that money came from the Hunts, who controlled nearly 200 million ounces of silver when the price dropped from around $50 to near $10 an ounce. As irritating to the Hunts as the losses', however, were the' wild eyed accusations and charges that cropped up in the press, prompted, according to Bunker, by the New York shorts. Bunker, a church elder who neither drinks nor smokes. turned up in the pages of Playboy Magazine tagged as "Silverfinger” and in Newsweek it was said that the Hunts and some mysterious Arabs had "all but cornered the world silver market.” Finally, Bunker and Herbert were subpoenaed by Congress and forced to testify about the affair under oath. Rep. Benjamin Rosenthal, a New York liberal, even threatened the Hunts with a contempt citation while the brothers tried to find the time to satisfy everyone who wanted to talk with them.

At last, though, the Hunts' story came out that they had been buying silver for years, and that they had never tried to keep their interest in silver a secret. It also came out that the Hunts had rolled forward their contracts to buy silver, which meant they were not trying to effect a corner or squeeze on the market. And when they were accused of getting preferential treatment in the $1.1 billion dollar loan restructuring to pay their silver debts, the Hunts pointed out their debt was collateralized at nine times value. Why wouldn't a banker make a loan with that kind of security'! ”It was a wide-open market:' Bunker observed, and for a long time they didn't mind us being their best customer. But in late 1971 with the Iranian situation and everything, everybody started getting into precious metals and the shorts started hurting. "They were supposed to make rules that were market neutral, but that's not what happened," he said. Herbert explained the silver fiasco with a football analogy: "It was us versus the other team and the referees. When we had the ball and were winning, they started calling back touchdowns. Then they said we could have the ball, but we couldn't move it. And finally they said only the other team could have the ball. How do you win a game like that?"

Losing a billion dollars or so in the silver futures market would be enough to qualify most people for Bonehead of the Year, but that wasn't enough for Bunker and Herbert Hunt. Not only did they lose the money, but they managed to get themselves blamed for the entire fiasco.

W. Herbert Hunt

HUNT BROTHERS WIN1981 BONEHEAD AWARD

1981

INDIANAPOLIS, Ind. 1981 -  Bobby Unser Having won three Indianapolis 500s (1968, 1975, 1981) Had his 1981 win taken away, when he allegedly passed cars during yellow flag, and win was given to Mario Andretti. Team owner Roger Penske protested and in October of that year, win was reinstated, giving Unser the distinction of having won the "longest" Indy 500.   In the movies, you know this plot: A cop or a thief is on the verge of retirement, but first he has to pull off One Last Big Job. Sunday's Indianapolis 500 had its own version of that story. Michael Andretti was the protagonist, Bobby Unser was the thorn in his side. Andretti, son of famous racer Mario, planned to retire after the race to concentrate on being a car team owner. But no, no, no.He finished second behind Bobby Unser on race day, but was awarded the victory later when officials ruled Unser passed under a yellow caution flag (a no-no), and then lost the race again months later when Unser successfully appealed that decision.  The Dallas Bonehead Club, after figuring out that from the time the race started till the courts decided that he should get the 500 win,  his MPH average was to be figured in seconds.  Now that is really a Bonehead feat. Part of the famed "First Family" of American auto racing, Bobby Unser, along with his younger brother Al, and nephew Al Jr., have won nine Indianapolis 500 races, a record unmatched by any other racing family. Unser got his start racing in the 1950s and has won several races on dirt track ovals, paved ovals and road courses. He has won the famed Pikes Peak Hill Climb numerous times and won his Indy 500s in three different decades (1968, 1975, & 1981), one of only two drivers to accomplish the feat. Unser won two United States Auto Club championships (1968 & 1974) and was a threat to win any race he entered as evidenced by his 35 wins and 49 poles in USAC/CART competition. Unser retired soon after his final Indy 500 win in 1981, and has entered the television commentary world, most recently for Canadian television as a color commentator. He also follows the career of his son, Robby, who competes in the Indy Racing League, and could add another Indianapolis 500 championship to the family. But the Bonehead Award is a first. Bobby and his wife will attend the 1982 Awards banquet and join the ranks of past winners. 

Bonehead of the Year Award Chairman Brad Angers with Bobby Unser

1982

Larry Walters Bonehead of The Year

On July 2, 1982, Larry Walters fastened 45 surplus balloons to a lawn chair and took off from his girlfriend's San Pedro home.  He carried several sandwiches, a six-pack of Miller Lite, various supplies as well as a CB radio and a BB gun to shoot balloons one at a time to descend.  He didn't realize how powerful the buoyancy of the balloons was.  When he cut a rope holding him to terra firma, he took off with such a jolt that another anchor rope broke under the stress and he shot upward so quickly that his eyeglasses flew to the ground.  He floated around the L.A. basin for several hours and reached altitudes of up to 16,000 feet.  According to the New York Times, Walters was spotted by pilots from both TWA and Delta Airlines.  It was cold at 16,000 feet and he started shooting some of his balloons to descend, but dropped his BB gun and had to wait for his rig to come down on its own.  He landed in a residential neighborhood in Long Beach where got tangled in some power lines, causing a power blackout. As soon as Larry was hauled to earth, he was arrested by waiting members of the LAPD for violating LAX airspace. He told reporters that his weather balloon flight had been a dream of more than 20 years was named by The Dallas Bonehead Club as the 1982 Bonehead of The Year, became something of a folk hero for his daredevil solo flight.

Up and Away

Larry Walters, sitting in his lawn chair, appears a bit concerned as he watches his last tether line break, shooting him skyward over California. Walters and his 45 weather balloons soared 16,000 feet high, exciting two jetliner pilots.

Larry Walters said, ”I went to the local Army-Navy surplus store and purchased 45 weather balloons and several tanks of helium. Then I securely strapped the balloons to a sturdy lawn chair and anchored the chair to the bumper of my jeep and inflated the balloons with helium.” “I packed several sandwiches and a six-pack of Miller Lite and loaded a pellet gun figuring I could pop a few balloons when it was time for me to descend.”

1983

Jacob Friedrich Brodbeck, received this years “Bonehead of the Year” award, not so much for his flight, but for his poor public relations. You see, he may actually have have been the first man to fly in an airplane. He was born in the Duchy of Württemberg on October 13, 1821. He may be best remembered for his attempts at powered flight almost forty years before the famous success of Orville and Wilbur Wright. Brodbeck had always had an interest in mechanics and inventing. In Germany he had attempted to build a self-winding clock, and in 1869 he designed an ice-making machine. His most cherished project, however, was his "air-ship," which he worked on for twenty years. In 1863 he built a small model with a rudder, wings, and a propeller powered by coiled springs. That year he also moved to San Antonio, where he became Encouraged by the success of his model at various local fairs .Brodbeck set about raising funds to build a full-sized version of his craft that would be capable of carrying a man. He persuaded a number of local . …

… men, including Dr. Ferdinand Herff of San Antonio, H. Guenther of New Braunfels and A. W. Engel of Cranes Mill, to buy shares in his project, promising to repay them within six months of selling the patent rights to his machine. There are conflicting accounts of what happened next. One says that Brodbeck made his first flight in a field about three miles east of Luckenbach on September 20, 1865. His airship, which featured an enclosed space for the "aeronaut," a water propeller in case of accidental landings on water, a compass, and a barometer, and for which Brodbeck had predicted speeds between 30 and 100 miles per hour, was said to have risen twelve feet in the air and traveled about 100 feet before the springs unwound completely and the machine crashed to the ground. Another account, however, says that the initial flight took place in San Pedro Park, San Antonio, where a bust of Brodbeck was now stands. Yet another account reports that the flight took place in 1868, not 1865. All the accounts agree, however, that Brodbeck's airship was destroyed by its abrupt landing, although the inventor escaped serious injury. But all agreed…He had flown. After this setback, his investors refused to put up the money for a second attempt, so he embarked on a fund-raising tour of the United States. His plans and research papers were stolen in Michigan, however, and he failed to persuade his audiences to invest in his scheme. Brodbeck returned to Texas and lived on a ranch near Luckenbach until his death, on January 8, 1910, six years after the Wright brothers' first flight, in a machine that Jacob contended resembled the plans that were stolen in Michigan, flew at Kitty Hawk. No drawings or blueprints of Brodbeck's craft have survived, and his aviation achievements remain shrouded in doubt. He was buried on his farm near Luckenbach. Jacobs grandson attended the Bonehead Awards to accept the trophy in his behalf.

1984Forty years before Orville and Wilber

You had an opportunity tolearn more and moreabout less and less and now you know everything about nothing.