Imaginary friends

Dr. Mohaned W. Abulihya

• Imaginary friends and imaginary companions are a psychological and social phenomenon where a friendship or other interpersonal relationship takes place in the imagination rather than external physical reality.

• Imaginary friends are fictional characters created for improvisational role-playing.

• Although they may seem very real to their creators, children usually understand that their imaginary friends are not real.

• Imaginary friends are made often in childhood, sometimes in adolescence, and rarely in adulthood.

• They reveal, according to several theories of psychology, a child's anxieties, fears, goals and perceptions of the world through that child's conversations.

• They are, according to some children, physically indistinguishable from real people.

• While others say they see their imaginary

friends only in their heads, and still others cannot see the friend at all but can sense his/her presence.

• Imaginary friends are more often seen as abnormal in adults, whereas quite common in children.

• Few adults report having imaginary friends; however, as Eileen Kennedy-Moore points out, "Adult fiction writers often talk about their characters taking on a life of their own, which may be an analogous process to children’s invisible friends.

• In addition, Marjorie Taylor and colleagues have found that :

Fiction writers are more likely than average to have had imaginary companions as children.

Research

• It has been theorized that children with imaginary companions may develop language skills and retain knowledge faster than children without them, which may be because these children get more linguistic practice than their peers as a result of carrying out "conversations" with their imaginary friends.

• Kutner (n.d.) reported that 65% of seven-year old children report they have had an imaginary companion at some point in their lives.

• Kutner further reported that imaginary companions are an integral part of many children's lives.

• They provide 1. Comfort in times of stress.

2. Companionship when they're lonely.

3. Someone to blame for the broken lamp in the living room.

• Most important, an imaginary companion is a tool young children use to help them make sense of the adult world.

• Some psychologists have suggested that older children may retain but stop speaking about imaginary friends due to adult expectations and peer pressure.

• Pediatrician Benjamin Spock believed that imaginary friends past age four indicated that something was "lacking" in the child or his environment.

• Some child development professionals believe that the presence of imaginary friends past early childhood signals a serious psychiatric disorder.

• Some have theorized that children who hold on to imaginary friends past school-age are stigmatized.

• Other professionals feel that imaginary friends are common among school-age children and are part of normal social-cognitive development.

• Marjorie Taylor identified middle school children with imaginary friends and followed up six years later as they were completing high school.

• At follow-up, those who had imaginary friends in middle school displayed better coping strategies but a "low social preference for peers." 

• She suggested that imaginary friends may directly benefit children's resiliency and positive adjustment.