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Friday, October 11, 2013 10:30am - 12pm Mediators, like other professionals, often describe our mediations in terms of what we did, how parties were acting, or what our strategy was. The choices we made in any given mediation may have been the right ones, but we often don't fully understand why we made them, and how those practice decisions affected the parties and the course of the mediation. This workshop invites participants to consider moving beyond the simple or more obvious explanations about why we chose to think or do something in a mediation (often calling it "intuition") and do the difficult work of looking more closely at some of our fundamental beliefs and how those beliefs act as lenses or filters that influence our work. We will examine the role of cognitive dissonance in the mediator and explore ways that the mediator can better prepare to manage situations in which it might happen. This session will use demonstration, reflection, discussion and presentation.
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Copyright 2005 Susanne Terry Do not copy or reprint without permission
COMPARISON OF THE ROLES OF THE MEDIATOR AND THE REFLECTIVE DEBRIEFER
MEDIATOR REFLECTIVE DEBRIEFER
Belief in parties Belief in mediator
Self determination is goal Self-determination is goal
Ask questions Ask questions
Frame Frame
Holds a mirror Holds a mirror
Parties determine outcome Focus person determines outcome
We do not give the answer We do not give the answer
Curiosity Curiosity
How can I help you? How can I help you?
They are the experts They are the experts
May share some observations May share some observations
Encourages Encourages
Builds trust Builds trust
Casts doubt Casts doubt
Reduces defensiveness Reduces defensiveness
Opens the door to options Opens the door to options
Opportunity for work at deeper level Opportunity for work at deeper level
Invites self revelation Invites self revelation
Invites personal growth Invites personal growth
Encourages careful analysis Encourages careful analysis
It’s not my problem It’s not my problem
You did it You did it
Never works harder than parties Never works harder than parties