Courageous Living Program

The CourageousLiving Program

Make what matters most, the central priority in your life.

Kate Courageous (aka, Kate Swoboda)http://www.yourcourageouslife.com

(c) Kate Swoboda, http://www.YourCourageousLife.com

http://www.yourcourageouslife.com


http://www.YourCourageousLife.com

http://www.YourCourageousLife.com

The Courageous Living Program

You’d love to get to know me better:

Web: http://www.yourcourageouslife.comTwitter: http://www.twitter.com/katecourageousFacebook: http://www.facebook.com/YourCourageousLife

An amazing life coaching training program: http://www.CourageousCoachingTraining.com

The Courageous Living Program

(c) Kate Swoboda, yourcourageouslife.com 2



http://www.twitter.com/katecourageous

http://www.twitter.com/katecourageous

http://www.facebook.com/YourCourageousLife

http://www.facebook.com/YourCourageousLife

http://www.CourageousCoachingTraining.com

http://www.CourageousCoachingTraining.com

Program Structure.

The idea is this: You clarify what it is that you truly want. (That’s a job in and of itself, isn’t it?).

At the same time, you are working with fear practices in a radically different way.

• You’re no longer trying not to feel your fear.

• You’re no longer trying to push it away.

• You’re no longer going to a place of giving up on your desires, either.

• You’ve done all of that before, and you know: It doesn’t work.

The Courageous Living Program is going to give you strategies--real pro-active strategies. The idea is that you clarify what you want and you pursue what you want, working with fear as it comes up, and you learn a lot from that journey.

When you live your life from a place of courage, you open yourself up for a fuller, richer experience of living.

I’m less interested in whether or not you can tick off the boxes of your goals/to-do list at the end of all of this.

I’m far more interested in knowing:


Did you truly live?

That’s what awaits you: True living. Full living. Living in a radically more grounded way, with more integrity, with more passion, with more commitment, with more excitement and inspiration--and living with all of the mucky stuff, too, because that’s real--but nonetheless, you’re living all of it.

100% fully alive. Beautiful.

~ with care (and love) ~

Kate


Table of Contents

Copyright info. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2Acknowledgements . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3Let’s Get Digital (PASSWORD INFO). . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4Table of Contents . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6

Note: The full Terms of Use are located on page 260.

Introduction: Courage as a Lifestyle 11Module One : Courageous Beginnings

17

Program Structure 18

Be on the Lookout: The Common Response to Fear 21

Module Two:Courageous Vision

23

Get Excited About Your Vision* VIDEO RESOURCE (Primary Focus)

24

PRINT: Primary Focus Sheet 29

Accountability Process 30

PRINT: Accountability Sheet 32

The Truth is Where We Begin 33

Establishing Your Values•VIDEO RESOURCE

37

The Shift Plan 46

Be Your Journey•VIDEO RESOURCE

51

Interview: Andrea Owen 57

The Inner Critic•VIDEO RESOURCE

58

Working With the Inner Critic: Re-Do, Please•VIDEO RESOURCE

66

On Reframing: An Interview with Christine Mason Miller• MEDIA RESOURCE

72

Slow. Down.•VIDEO RESOURCE

73

Interview: Jen Louden 77

The Power of Words 78

Acknowledge & Celebrate• VIDEO RESOURCE

82


Module ThreeCourageous Creating

85

Clarifying Your Stories• VIDEO RESOURCE, Welcome to Belief & Story

86

Everything is a Story 87

Words & Stories• VIDEO RESOURCE, The Power of Words

92

Your Parents 95

Quit Blaming Circumstances 100

Interview: Paul Jarvis 105

Interview: Pixie Campbell 106

Blaming Yourself• VIDEO RESOURCE, Blaming Yourself

107

Stories about Who you will “Have To” be 110

Interview: Kate Northrup 113

Interview: Danielle LaPorte 114

Integrity• VIDEO RESOURCE

115

The “Not Enough” Story• VIDEO RESOURCE

122

Interview: Marianne Elliott 124

You Are Always In Choice•VIDEO RESOURCE

125

Integrity is Sexy• VIDEO RESOURCE

132

Recognizing the Victim Mindset• VIDEO RESOURCE, The “Benefits” of Being a

Victim

139

Interview: Marc Allen 144

Getting Over It• VIDEO RESOURCE

145

Interview: Co-Founders of Café Gratitude 153

Module Four:Courageous Desire & Emotion

154

The Courage to Tap into Your True Desires 155

Your Life Vision 158

The Importance of Working With Emotions• VIDEO RESOURCE: “What Are Emotions, Anyway?”

163

Interview: Brene Brown 168

JOY 169

What the hell is a Laugh Session?•VIDEO RESOURCE

172

Glad No Matter What :: An Interview with SARKVIDEO RESOURCE

175


Cutting Ourselves Off From Joy•VIDEO RESOURCE

176

Anger•VIDEO RESOURCE

180

Why Work on Any of This? 186

Anger Tools•VIDEO RESOURCE

187

An Interview with Rich & Yvonne of Challenge DayVIDEO RESOURCE

193

Working With Emotions: Sadness•VIDEO RESOURCE

194

Sadness Tools•VIDEO RESOURCE

197

Gentleness Check•VIDEO RESOURCE

202

Module Five:Courageous Power

205

Refining 206

Who are you surrounding yourself with? 207

Interview: Cheri Huber 213

On Wiggling 214

Stop Doing Lists 217

Stop Trying to Be Right 218

Losing It 225

Claim Your Life 230

Hiding Out 233

Stories About the Word “Power”• VIDEO RESOURCE

234

Attachment & Courageous Power 235

Reframe the Shoulds• VIDEO RESOURCE: The benefits of being your

journey and reframing the shoulds

239

The Opinions of Others 241

Interview: Chris Guillebeau 244

Forgiveness Letters 245

Interview (pending): Kelly Rae Roberts 247

Interview: Andrea Scher 248

It’s Your Choice 249

COMPLETE PROGRAM ASSESSMENT

251


Resources 255

Feedback 259

!"#$%&'(&)%" *+,

The Story Behind This Program 261

Thank You 262

Disclaimer: This e-program and its contents are not intended to be used as a substitute for psychotherapy or work with a mental health professional.


You don’t have to wait to live your vision. You can decide what your life vision is, what gets you fired up, what you know you could “get behind,” and then start practicing living that (with gentleness for the times when you aren’t practicing it perfectly).

This is a choice. The second you recognize that, you’re taking full ownership of your life.


Lesson One: You get what you give.This is how it is, you know? You get what you give. I say this lovingly. I say this as someone who has started something new with all of the best intentions, and seen what happens when I didn’t have a plan. The most discouraging times were those when I didn’t want to take responsibility for my experience.

You are encouraged to make your first priority this and this only: Determine how you’ll go about wrestling down this wiggly, wily octopus of change that is before you. Take a realistic look at your schedule and decide whether you’d like to bop in three times a week, once a week, every day...it’s totally up to you.

Suggested commitment:Make checking in with this Program the thing that you do before you check your email each day.

Twenty minutes--start the day by checking in with you.

That’s it. Keep it simple.

Also:Believe in the power of five minutes. If you don’t have twenty minutes, take five. Five minutes of sinking into something can work wonders. Be willing right now to cut past the drama of, “But I only have five minutes.” Instead, choose to make whatever time you have available to you, enough.

Consider printing this out and putting it in a binder. I’m all about saving trees, but something tells me I’ll never fully go digital when it comes to books--I want the feeling of holding them in my hand, dog-earing pages, and underlining things that are important to me. Make this something that you can sit with on the couch while sipping tea and wrapped in your favorite blanket, or that you can take with you and review while you wait for your kid to get out of ballet class, or if an appointment runs late. Put it next to your bed, and read one thing before you go to bed at night.

Use accountability measures. This can mean blogging about your process, finding an accountability partner, starting a group, working with a life coach, putting electronic ringing bells into your calendar.


http://www.yourcourageouslife.com/life-coaching

http://www.yourcourageouslife.com/life-coaching

Take what you need, leave the rest. You are your own best guide.

Trust that the intention behind everything presented here, no matter how confrontational it may seem, is intended in kindness and pushing you to live big.

Trust that you can do this.

Planning in Time

Use the following calendar to plan in when you’d like to make space in your life, twenty minutes a day (more if you wish!) to check in with this e-program. I suggest taking it just one or two lessons at a time.

Monday:

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

Friday:

Saturday:

Sunday:

“My back-up plan in case my kid gets sick, my boss needs me extra days at work, I get really busy, I feel resistant, etc., is”:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


The Truth is Where We Begin.

Whenever a new client is working with me, it’s good to start with the truth. What’s the truth of your life? What has been working, and what hasn’t? What Stories do you tell, and where are they serving you, and where are they not?

The Wheel of Life

The “Wheel of Life” exercise is a classic coaching exercise that I read about in a Co-Active Coaching book written by Whitworth, Kimsey-House, and Sandhal. It’s designed to get you thinking about fulfillment and satisfaction, as well as to start thinking about where things in your life are out of balance.

To be clear--we’re not talking about “life balance” in that striving way, where you’re trying to get everything all perfectly evened out. That doesn’t really work. But there is something to be said for looking at your life holistically, and noticing that work and career have taken up 90% of your time and effort, whereas family and friends are low on the priorities scale.

After you’ve taken time to evaluate the truth of where you’re at in your life, right now, you move on to planning.

Own and acknowledge the truth. THEN start planning.*

*This is where so many planning systems get it wrong, you know. They focus completely on the future, without taking time to get real about...the present. I “get” that it’s far sexier for you to focus on dreams, sort of like it’s more fun to window shop than to rack up credit card debt that you have to pay off.

But what are we talking about, here? Living in lah-lah land, or actually SEEING the things happen that you want to see happen? I’m thinking you’re a smart one, and that you’d rather SEE things happen than endlessly dream about them happening.

Evaluating Fulfillment

First, you evaluate your life satisfaction in a particular area on a scale of 1-10.


1= “It was completely and utterly unsatisfying in every way.” 5 = “Pretty neutral. Not great. Not bad.” 10 = “I ROCKED this area of my life!”

Intimate relationships = How satisfied are you with your intimate/romantic relationship(s), currently? ________

Friends/family = Currently, how satisfied are you with your relationships with friends and family? ________ (Check this one: you can love your friends and family a lot, but know that there might be some places where things are quietly resentful).

Career = How are you feeling about your work life? ________

Money = This is a tough one for most people. How satisfied/fulfilled are you, in relationship to money? ________

Physical Health = Be gentle with yourself! _________

Home/Physical Environment = Do you love the home you live in? Do you deal with clutter reasonably well? Do the family chores feel reasonably balanced? ______

Spiritual/Personal Development = Are you pretty open about working on your “stuff”? Are there any areas of resistance you know you haven’t dealt with or explored? _______

Fun & Recreation = Are you making adequate time for fun? And since the point of life is to live happily and well, let me go one step further: are you making MORE Than enough time for fun? _______

After inputting your “scores” for each category, turn to the next page.


The Wheel of Life

Below, there’s a sample Wheel of Life and a blank one for you to fill out. Approximate how much of the pie slice to fill, based on the scores you gave, earlier. If you gave something a “3” you’d fill in a smaller piece of the pie than if you gave it a “10” (in which case, congratulations--shade in the entire slice).


A BUMPY RIDE?

Some people would notice that their wheels would be very, very bumpy rides. Others might notice that everything is really...even. Pretty okay, by-the-by, oh well, shrug of the shoulders--maybe some 6,7,8 scores, across the board. Anything you want to liven up? Others might notice that things are pretty tight and constricted, with lots of 1,2,3 scores towards the inside of the circle.

Take a moment to clearly identify the immediate insights that you get from creating your own Wheel of Life:

Here’s where we’re going, now:

STEP ONE: Clarify/Establish Values.

STEP TWO: Clarify your Life Vision.

STEP THREE: Use those to create a Primary Focus of big vision dreams and desires.

STEP FOUR: Incorporate essential courage practices, so that that big vision can happen.


Ready for the Program?If youʼre ready to start The Courageous Living Program, head here to learn more:http://www.yourcourageouslife.com/courageous-living-program

"I am the kind of person who dithers a lot about committing to things like this, but I am so glad I trusted my instincts with this one. I would recommend it (and have done!) to whoever asks. I like the style with which the course is written [... it] put the power in my hands and got me to consider things differently." — E. S.

!"I know Kate does amazing work so I knew I would be getting a quality product I find it to be a wonderful tool and reminder as I keep growing in life." -- Brandi Reynolds

!"This is not a quick fix – what you get out of it is directly related to what you put into it (as with anything). You will however, have access to powerful and amazing tools right from the start. I can personally speak to the power of the guides, DOing the work, and Kate’s way of illuminating the path." — D. S.

!"It’s really interesting to begin to see how so many of these things are connected–the inner kid, the blame story, forgiveness, being in integrity with myself...It’s definitely freeing, and I’m so glad to have had the courage to begin the process." -C.V.

!"The questions you pose have spurred me on to explore how I can better use my time and talents. I value your gift for writing things how they are, for not glossing over issues and for challenging faulty thinking."-- J.B.G.

!"I enjoy 'spending time' with 'virtual' Kate. It's like having an old friend you don't see all that often so you lose the day to day detail but the long standing support is in place. In a lot of ways its like holding a mirror up to myself and having someone there to make sure I see reality. Really the program for me is about accepting myself, appreciating myself and having the courage to let other people accept and appreciate me." --K.C.

!"It's helped me to stop 'doing' all the time and start 'being' and ask myself what 'being' means to me and what I want my life to be as I move forward. It's been a tough few months, but I've really stepped up to take responsibility for my life and stop simply going through the motions." --L.C.

!


http://www.yourcourageouslife.com/courageous-living-program

http://www.yourcourageouslife.com/courageous-living-program

"I think my favourite lesson (and the one I return to the most) is that I can choose joy in each and every moment. If I’m having a “bad” day I look at myself and then ask myself how can I choose joy right now. I seek joy out and I feel so much better for it. I am so thankful to you, Kate, for your incredible wisdom and guidance." – H.T.

!"I hope it doesn’t sound like too much of an overstatement to say that the sample pre-order chapter was worth, to me, $125 before I even received the rest of the e-book! (Feel free to use that as a testimonial).” — M.W.

!"I see it [The Program] as a life companion for the next year. It is written in a compassionate but also true way, which I do like very much." -Jona


thank you.thank you for your willingnessto liveto live fullyto live boldlyto live with courage.

you are changing the worldmore than you can ever knowor imagine.

you are a light for the worldjust by beingexactly who you are.

it blows my heart wide openmore than you can everknow.


Documents

Courageous Living Program