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GuHelloGuest - 1:56 PM

hi how are you? (:picturedays - 1:56 PM

GuMy name is minwooGuest - 1:57 PM

GuNot very goodGuest - 1:57 PM

Gui came onto this website to talk about my problemsGuest - 1:57 PM

would you like to tell me about it?picturedays - 1:57 PM

GuI grew up in a very religious household in texas

Guest - 1:57 PM

Guand currently facing agression from my familyGuest - 1:57 PM

GuThey don't like to question things and have gotten very angryGuest - 1:57 PM

Guthat i question things or speak out about my opinionGuest - 1:58 PM

 Tip: Your listener is like a trusted friend. You can find other listeners that speak your language or share your interests by clicking on “Browse Listeners.”

GuEvery time i say anythingGuest - 1:58 PM

Gueven if its not related to an important topicGuest - 1:58 PM

Gusomething as simple as when will you pick me upGuest - 1:58 PM

Guthey tell me to be quietGuest - 1:58 PM

Guand that a real man doesnt talkGuest - 1:58 PM

GuI want to consider being on my ownGuest - 1:58 PM

GuBut i'm scaredGuest - 1:58 PM

GuI was above average in school but always felt afraid to talk to authoritesGuest - 1:59 PM

Gusuch as talk to a counselor and do college application progressesGuest - 1:59 PM

Guprocesses*Guest - 1:59 PM

GuSo i messed up my college application somewhatGuest - 1:59 PM

Guand am currently attendingGuest - 1:59 PM

Gucomunity college post high schoolGuest - 1:59 PM

GuI know that i haven't messed up my career track yetGuest - 1:59 PM

Gubut i feel like i'm unable to stop myselfGuest - 1:59 PM

Gufrom continually messing upGuest - 1:59 PM

Gui feel like im afraid to be successful in lifeGuest - 2:00 PM

GuI feel like i should settle who i amGuest - 2:00 PM

Guand deserve lessGuest - 2:00 PM

GuI know that i should try harderGuest - 2:00 PM

GuAnd go after lifeGuest - 2:00 PM

GuBut i feel like my life is arleady predeterminedGuest - 2:00 PM

Guand the only consolation i have is that i "can" change itGuest - 2:00 PM

Guand its not cemented yetGuest - 2:00 PM

Guwhat should i doGuest - 2:01 PM

has your home life ever felt abusive in any way?picturedays - 2:01 PM

Guno i can tell my parents sincerely love meGuest - 2:01 PM

Gubut they grew up in a asia and their culture is very different then mineGuest - 2:01 PM

Gui don't want to say it but i almost feel like they are less educated then meGuest - 2:02 PM

Gui'm able to see the flaws that they have and it really bums me outGuest - 2:02 PM

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Guto see people i love around me not reach their full potentialGuest - 2:02 PM

Gui feel like everyone around me is living behind a veil and i can see throuhg itGuest - 2:02 PM

Gubut im to scared to go throughGuest - 2:02 PM

GuIm to scared to try harder in lifeGuest - 2:02 PM

GuIm to scared to talk to authority figuresGuest - 2:02 PM

do you think this is whats holding you back?picturedays - 2:03 PM

Guyes i do but i dont know what to do about itGuest - 2:03 PM

Gui dont do drugs or alcoholGuest - 2:03 PM

Gu

but i know myself well enough that if i ever didGuest - 2:03 PM

Gui'd be addicted just from my personalityGuest - 2:03 PM

GuI distract myself with video games and suchGuest - 2:03 PM

Guand try to seek other peoples approvalGuest - 2:04 PM

Guthat since i cant love myselfGuest - 2:04 PM

Gui should make othersGuest - 2:04 PM

GuI am extremely caring to other peoples problems and always want to help themGuest - 2:04 PM

Gu

Im fine with not being in the spotlightGuest - 2:04 PM

Guif i can be praised in the backgroundGuest - 2:04 PM

Gubut i'm actually not okGuest - 2:04 PM

Gui want to follow my dreamsGuest - 2:04 PM

Gui want to succeed in life i want to do thingsGuest - 2:04 PM

GuI'm tired of just going through the motionsGuest - 2:05 PM

I am kind of in the same situationpicturedays - 2:05 PM

I am a first generation from an asian immigrated familypicturedays - 2:05 PM

I'm in the process of moving outpicturedays - 2:06 PM

and I know life is scary and unpredictablepicturedays - 2:06 PM

I'm sure you feel the same waypicturedays - 2:06 PM

Gui feel scared that its to predictableGuest - 2:07 PM

Gui know what i need to do to be happyGuest - 2:07 PM

Gui hate myself for not doing itGuest - 2:07 PM

Gui know what i need to do to succeedGuest - 2:07 PM

Gubut i'm not doing itGuest - 2:07 PM

Guits not that im scared of the unknownGuest - 2:07 PM

Guim scared that im not going into the knownGuest - 2:07 PM

Gui call myself a coward for not doing something to make myself happier when i know what it is i need to doGuest - 2:07 PM

don't be afraid to at least try. life is about risks and putting yourself out therepicturedays - 2:08 PM

everyone wants to see you succeedpicturedays - 2:09 PM

your friends, familypicturedays - 2:09 PM

especially your familypicturedays - 2:09 PM

they would never want to hold you backpicturedays - 2:09 PM

they want to see you grow, succeed in the way you see fitpicturedays - 2:10 PM

Gui just wish i had someone to give a pushGuest - 2:10 PM

Gui feel like if i want to get outGuest - 2:10 PM

Guof this role that im acting outGuest - 2:10 PM

Gui need someone to help meGuest - 2:10 PM

Gui don't have anyone to talk to that i can actually reveal myself toGuest - 2:11 PM

GuI don't want to generalize but i felt that my high school life was superficialGuest - 2:11 PM

Guand nobody actually cared about anythingGuest - 2:11 PM

Gui know my family loves me but i find it hard to talk with them about difficult issues like thisGuest - 2:11 PM

do you think that superficial high school experience influenced your motivation today?picturedays - 2:11 PM

Guyes i doGuest - 2:12 PM

Gumaybe i grew up in a rare environmentGuest - 2:12 PM

Gubut i felt like everyone around meGuest - 2:12 PM

Guincluding family friendsGuest - 2:12 PM

Guwere shallowGuest - 2:12 PM

Gui could see their beliefs motivationGuest - 2:12 PM

Guand it all felt so shallow to meGuest - 2:12 PM

Gumaybe it's wrong of me to think thatGuest - 2:12 PM

Gulike when my fatherGuest - 2:13 PM

Gutells me to stop talkingGuest - 2:13 PM

Gucause a real man doesnt talkGuest - 2:13 PM

Gui know its cause he grew up in that environmentGuest - 2:13 PM

Gui knew my fathers father and he was very abusiveGuest - 2:13 PM

Gubut everyone around me i feel acts like thatGuest - 2:13 PM

Gui never had anyone to look up toGuest - 2:13 PM

Gunobody around me really triedGuest - 2:13 PM

Gu"dumb" students gave up because people told them they were dumbGuest - 2:14 PM

Gu"smart" kids only studied for good grades and were helped out non-stop by their parentsGuest - 2:14 PM

Gui initially started feeling this way during high schoolGuest - 2:14 PM

Gueveryone was playing the gameGuest - 2:14 PM

Guteachers were pretending to teachGuest - 2:14 PM

Gustudents pretending to learnGuest - 2:14 PM

Guall just for good gradesGuest - 2:14 PM

Gunobody actually caredGuest - 2:14 PM

Guthere was no one to talk toGuest - 2:14 PM

Guand when i talked to the school counselor about my problemsGuest - 2:15 PM

Gushe said i was overthinking itGuest - 2:15 PM

Guand went to the next student to talk about college applicationsGuest - 2:15 PM

Guthats all people talked aboutGuest - 2:15 PM

Gucollege application this or thatGuest - 2:15 PM

Gui care about college on a deep levelGuest - 2:15 PM

Gui want to get educated and even know what i want to beGuest - 2:15 PM

Gubut the process just reminds me of chigh schoolGuest - 2:15 PM

what do you want to be?picturedays - 2:15 PM

Gui want to be an actuaryGuest - 2:16 PM

Gua risk manager for insurance companiesGuest - 2:16 PM

Guive always loved mathGuest - 2:16 PM

GueconomicsGuest - 2:16 PM

Guand public speakingGuest - 2:16 PM

Gubut the reason that i'm scared to succeedGuest - 2:16 PM

Gu

is that since i grew up so isolatedGuest - 2:16 PM

Guin such a non-questioning uncritical environmentGuest - 2:16 PM

Guhow can i really succeed in the real worldGuest - 2:16 PM

Gui know that people are sometimes as niceGuest - 2:16 PM

Gui konw that sometimes people are mean but in the top arenaGuest - 2:17 PM

Guthe place where i'm aimingGuest - 2:17 PM

Guto be top of my class in collegeGuest - 2:17 PM

Gu

best at my jobGuest - 2:17 PM

Gua person has to be motivated and efficientGuest - 2:17 PM

Guhow can i succeed in that environment when i grew up so shelteredGuest - 2:17 PM

Gui'm more content to stay 2nd bestGuest - 2:17 PM

Guand keep being scaredGuest - 2:18 PM

Guand im scared that i cant love othersGuest - 2:18 PM

Gui never had a girl friend during high school even tho i couldveGuest - 2:18 PM

Gu

but now everywhere i seeGuest - 2:18 PM

Gui find it hard to relate to people around meGuest - 2:18 PM

Gumy father who grew up uneducatedGuest - 2:18 PM

Gufriends who only went to school to get good gradesGuest - 2:18 PM

Gui don't want to grow up to hate peopleGuest - 2:19 PM

Gui want to understand themGuest - 2:19 PM

Gubut i feel like i understand them to muchGuest - 2:19 PM

Gu

and im the only person around with emotions and genuine feelingsGuest - 2:19 PM

Gui know thats not trueGuest - 2:19 PM

Gutheres people out there that are deep and thoughtfulGuest - 2:19 PM

Gui want to share a close relationship with someoneGuest - 2:19 PM

Guwhehter that be family or friendGuest - 2:19 PM

Guand i cant find itGuest - 2:19 PM

Gueverywhere i look i see immature peopleGuest - 2:20 PM

Gu

and maybe its cause im looking for them onlyGuest - 2:20 PM

Gumaybe i'm ignoring people i can connect toGuest - 2:20 PM

Guall because i'm scared to find themGuest - 2:20 PM

Guif i find these immature people i can point my finger and say haGuest - 2:20 PM

Gu"thats why i cant deeply connect to people"Guest - 2:20 PM

Gumaybe its cause in high school i was very well likedGuest - 2:20 PM

Gui kinda knew what was humorous and appropriateGuest - 2:21 PM

Gu

how to talk to people how to make them happyGuest - 2:21 PM

Gui was "friends" with pretty much everyoneGuest - 2:21 PM

Gui got invited to a lot of gatherings and clubsGuest - 2:21 PM

GuPeople liked talking to me and i was always smilingGuest - 2:21 PM

Gui tried telling myself that i am happyGuest - 2:21 PM

Gubut i really wasn'tGuest - 2:21 PM

Gui was always sadGuest - 2:21 PM

maybe you need a change of environment

picturedays - 2:22 PM

you need o access what you think is best for youpicturedays - 2:22 PM

*need to accesspicturedays - 2:22 PM

Guhow can i do thatGuest - 2:23 PM

well to me it sounds like you know what you wantpicturedays - 2:23 PM

now its time to figure out how to get therepicturedays - 2:23 PM

its a process and its not gonna easypicturedays - 2:24 PM

Gui'm not afraid of failureGuest - 2:25 PM

Gui know that on my way to successGuest - 2:25 PM

Gu

im going to stumble and fallGuest - 2:25 PM

Guand im ok with thatGuest - 2:25 PM

Gui was just scared to tryGuest - 2:25 PM

Guthank you so much for listening to meGuest - 2:25 PM

Gui feel a lot better after talking about what i am feeling for the first timeGuest - 2:25 PM

Gui dont know if ill be able to go on that path yetGuest - 2:25 PM

Gubut i do know that i feel a lot better and can at least startGuest - 2:26 PM

it's frustrating and there are challenges

picturedays - 2:26 PM

but you'll only grow and learn more from itpicturedays - 2:26 PM

Guthank youGuest - 2:26 PM

mhmm. of course (:picturedays - 2:27 PM

Gui'm going to save this conversationGuest - 2:27 PM

Guand whenver i feel sadGuest - 2:27 PM

Guim going to read it to motivate meGuest - 2:27 PM

Guthanks for listeningGuest - 2:28 PM