2014BEST OF

collegianTHE WALLA WALLA UNIVERSITY

VOLUME 99 | ISSUE 10 | 11 DECEMBER 2014 |

02 context

Editor’s Letter & Table of Contents | 2News | 3Photos | 4

08 perspective

Feature | 6-7Opinion | 8Religion | 9

14 life

Humor | 5Food | 10Travel & Sports | 11Fashion | 12CW & CW | 13Science | 14#thecollegian | 15The Other Cheek | 16

Cover Credit: Illustration By Teddy Zirkle

The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be sent to aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu or richard.barbosa@wallawalla.edu. This issue was completed at 11:36 A.M. on Wednesday, December 10, 2014.

If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, speak with one of our illustrious staff members. The Collegian is enhanced by regularly incorporating a wide range of campus perspectives.

For information about advertising, please contact Shandra Cady at aswwu.ads@wallawalla.edu.

The Collegian | Volume 99, Issue 8 | 204 S. College Avenue, College Place, WA 99324 | collegian.wallawalla.edu

Mon

ica

Culle

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EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Ricky Barbosa

ASSISTANT EDITOR

Karl Wallenkampf

LAYOUT EDITOR

Mindy Robinson

HEAD COPY EDITOR

Andrea Johnson

PERSPECTIVE EDITOR

Alex Lemnah

CONTENT EDITOR

Carolyn Green

BACKPAGE & CREATIVE CURATOR

Abigail Wissink

CULTURE WRITER

River Davis

FASHION WRITER

Alyssa Hartwick

FOOD WRITER

Rachel Peterson

HUMOR WRITER & OFFICE MANAGER Lauren Lewis

NEWS WRITERS

Savannah KislingMorgan Sanker

RELIGION WRITERS

Benjamin RameyRandy Folkenberg

ADVERTISING MANAGERShandra Cady

SCIENCE & TECH WRITER

Daniel Hulse

SPORTS WRITER & PROMOTION MANAGER

Alex Wagner

TRAVEL & LOCAL WRITER

Shannon Pierce

COPY EDITORS

Tyler JacobsonKayla AlbrechtRachel Blake

DISTRIBUTION MANAGER

Zachary Johnson

LAYOUT DESIGNERS

Matthew MoranIan SmithEmily Brinley

ASWWU HEAD PHOTO EDITOR

Erick Juarez

@lo

ganm

cart

er

theg

uard

ian.

com

Erick Juarez

Merry Christmas!From all of us at The Collegian

03NEWSCONTEXT

kislingNews Writer

SAVANNAH

sankerNews Writer

MORGAN

In November 2014, Walla Walla University Library moved onto the new ExLibris Primo platform for our library catalog and to access Summit materials. This new platform, titled Research Central, is available at the library home page. This page provides access to local WWU Library holdings (including books, media, and eBooks), access to Summit holdings (books, media, and other materials throughout over 30 academic libraries in Washington, Oregon, and Idaho), and access to full-text articles pulled from many of WWU’s databases and electronic journal subscriptions. This updated system provides an increased amount of content to be easily accessed by WWU students and faculty.

When in Research Central, it is recommended students use the yellow search bar to login with their University ID to easily view available full-text articles and eBooks. Many of WWU’s databases now show up in Research Central. Other databases will be continually added throughout the remainder of the school year.

Through the end of this quarter, items may be viewed on the past Summit catalog but can only be requested through Research Central — location information may be out of date as all availability information was frozen mid-November. Starting Winter Quarter, Research Central will be the only way to access these sources.

Many things are happening with Research Central behind the scenes. If students run into problems, feel free to come by the library and ask at the reference desk for assistance or email the staff (reference@wallawalla.edu) with what you are trying to do so they can continue to improve this platform. Librarians will begin teaching this platform in classes Winter Quarter 2015, but if students would prefer an in-person tour, stop by the reference desk in the afternoons or evenings to chat with a librarian. The libraries are here to help. Use the resources available to you!

Students showcased original music this past Saturday to raise money for a local family in need. Timmy Oliver headed up the event, and The Collegian had the opportunity to ask him a few questions about the concert.

Q: Where did you get the idea to showcase original music?

A: WWU has so many different opportunities throughout the year where musicians can perform, but none of these events seem to highlight original music. I would say the event that comes closest to this are the open-mics in the Atlas. We haven’t really had a place at WWU where the singer/songwriter can present, in a concert setting, their own original

music. So many songwriters have come and gone from this place without many opportunities to share their own music. I am hoping that this might become a springboard for songwriters to become a valued part of our WWU culture.

The short of it: I saw a need and filled it.

Q: Why did you choose to hold the event in the library?

A: After bringing Ryan Thorpe and Josh Jamieson on board, we began to discuss location. We were struggling to come up with a place that fit our needs. Finally, through a Facebook message, Ryan came up with the brilliant idea of holding it in the Reference room of the Library. In his own words: “I don’t think they would ever let us do this, but the reference room

in the library would be sick.” I was actually studying in the library at the time that I saw his message, so I immediately started talking with Mrs. Gaskell, the head librarian. She is a wonderful lady and very easy going and great to work with. It worked out better than we could have imagined.

Q: Do you think the event was successful?

A: Absolutely. We had about 80 attendees who basically filled the room, yet it didn’t feel uncomfortably full. All of our goals were met: Bringing awareness of songwriters here on campus, and raising money for a family who was in dire need.

Q: Tell us about the fundraising aspect of the concert.

A: We didn’t want to make this event just about the music,

but wanted to make this event mean something more. There is a family in need this Christmas season for whom we raised $500! This is a significant amount of money coming from the pockets of under 80 college students! I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone who came to the concert and donated to this cause. From the bottom of my heart, thank you, thank you, thank you! Once again, you have surpassed expectations in the way that you have given, not out of reluctance, but out of compassion! (Matthew 25:36). If you would like to know more about this family, feel free to contact the Campus Ministries office.

Q: Who was involved in the event?

A: Josh Jamieson, and I, and Ryan Thorpe, headed the event.

There was also everyone in my band (Kurt Lamberton, Tyler Sherwin, Mindy Robinson, Daniel Jenks, Benji Oliver), Sean Lehnhoff (playing Sax for Josh), and Kevin Ellis (rapping for Ryan).

Q: Do you think there is a need for more events like this at Walla Walla?

A: Yes, I do. There are more songwriters here on campus than you or I know about and they have very few, if any outlets aside from the solitude of their dorm rooms. I hope that this will inspire others to start sharing more of their own artistic expressions here on campus and even beyond, and that people will not feel confined to a specific event in order to express a specific talent they might possess, but to be proactive in creating the opportunities if none are handed to them.

A PLACE FOR SOME ORIGINAL MUSIC

System UpdateWWU’S LIBRARY

Josh Mckinney

SnapSHOTS

CONTEXTSNAPSHOTS04

Ladies and Gents,

Dead Week is here and to bring Christmas cheer, this week’s article is a compilation of the most hilarious dating stories I have ever been told. This is Western Wedding University and what else would we talk about here? Especially when the season calls for freely flying mistletoe, forcing unsuspecting people to embarrass themselves with a slimey smooch.

These stories have been submitted anonymously and names and stories have been paraphrased or changed for anonymity, but they are from WWU. If you have stories regarding your best, worst, and most hilarious dating experiences, please share them with me at lauren.lewis2@wallawalla.edu. I promise to keep them anonymous!

@awkardturtle says, “I went to the drive-in theater with three people one spring quarter. I didn’t suspect it was a double date until I was sitting in the back seat with Fernando and the couple in the front seat was cuddling. My pseudo-date and I were talking, joking and making

Caleb Riston

Caleb Riston

Caleb Riston

Caleb Riston

Vitali

y Kriv

oruk

Erick Juarez

Arella

Aung

Vitaliy Krivoruk

05HUMORLIFE

“CHRISTMAS DOESN’T COME FROM A STORE, MAYBE CHRISTMAS PERHAPS MEANS A LITTLE BIT MORE…”

Title Game: Whoever is the first to identify the author of my title and email me at lauren.lewis2@wallawalla.edu will receive a baked good (Hint: He likes cats and hats).

lewisLAUREN

Humor Writer

thecollegianSNAPCHAT

Ladies and Gents,

Dead Week is here and to bring Christmas cheer, this week’s article is a compilation of the most hilarious dating stories I have ever been told. This is Western Wedding University and what else would we talk about here? Especially when the season calls for freely flying mistletoe, forcing unsuspecting people to embarrass themselves with a slimey smooch.

These stories have been submitted anonymously and names and stories have been paraphrased or changed for anonymity, but they are from WWU. If you have stories regarding your best, worst, and most hilarious dating experiences, please share them with me at lauren.lewis2@wallawalla.edu. I promise to keep them anonymous!

@awkardturtle says, “I went to the drive-in theater with three people one spring quarter. I didn’t suspect it was a double date until I was sitting in the back seat with Fernando and the couple in the front seat was cuddling. My pseudo-date and I were talking, joking and making

sarcastic comments, and suddenly Fernando says, ‘You look pretty.’ Immediately I reply, ‘Well that’s awkward.’ Following that comment the rest of the night and the rest of the relationship was awkward. ‘Sorry, dude.’ ”

@firstdatefailer says, “I have had really bad luck on my past first dates. In both scenarios the date was great until I found out their ages. One was 31, the other similar. I am 21, and everything went downhill after that. One guy asked if I wouldn’t mind staying at home and raising our hypothetical children 15 minutes into the date. That is when I called for the check and got the heck out of there.”

@tooexcited says, “I high-fived a girl after she said yes to going out on a date with me.”

@sicklysweet says, “I had been going on really great dates with Donald. One night, walking back to the dorm, he asks me nervously and

with a stutter, ‘So… do you want to be my girlfriend?’ At this point my hands were frozen in the 12-degree Walla Walla winter and we were sprinting for the dorm door. I quickly replied, ‘Sure.’ He then says, ‘Sick!’ We both retreated for warmer climates. We are still together, FYI.”

@isaidtwowords says, “My friend set me up on a blind date at Starbucks. My date was 15 minutes late when he finally showed; we ordered drinks and sat down to talk. 55 minutes later all we had covered was my date’s obsession with making a lightsaber and his belief that he was Aquaman and could swim faster than Michael Phelps. I faked a meeting and left. Good thing I ordered a $6 drink.”

@unfortunatebowels says, “During one of those cliché Adventist banquets, my date mysteriously left for 30 minutes. When he finally returned he explained that he had been puking, was sick, and needed to go home.”

@tookmetotheSAC says, “My first date at WWU was at the SAC. He picked me up from the dorm and drove us around to the back of the SAC. I walked inside to find tables in the corner, with flowers and candles. Our mutual friend, Ronaldo, dressed in a suit and took our order. I got the veggie burger with tots, and he graciously paid with his Flex Meal Plan. It was cute and financially conscious.”

So there you go lovely peeps. I hope we live through Dead Week and test days to find ourselves on the flip side embracing Christmas Break all in one piece. If you need some inspiration to finish out the week, google Portland Speedo Santa 5k. It is horribly hilarious and will keep you awake with vivid images which I will not describe in print. Enjoy your break, and to quote Professor Montes, “Be good. And if you can’t be good, be discreet.”

In Memory: Robin Williams

Best Christmas Song: "Text Me Merry Christmas"

by Kristen Bell

Best Songs: "Shake it Off"

by Taylor Swift

"Take Me to Church" by Hozier

"All About that Bass" by Meghan Trainor

Best ASWWU videos: "How to Find Your Place,"

"It's On Us — Wolves Do Something,"

"WWU — Bad Lip-Reading"

Best @thecollegian snapchat submissions:

Best Sandwiches in Walla Walla: Steak or Veggie Torta/Butternut

Squash Panini at Graze

Best seasonal Atlas drinks: Octobear, Saint Nick,

Remember Remember Latté

BEST OF

In Memory: Robin Williams

Best Movies: Boyhood,

The LEGO Movie, Interstellar

Best TV Shows: Orange Is the New Black,

True Detective, Black Mirror

Best YouTube Video: "Words of Wisdom from an

Unknown Citizen" by Enlisted Films

Best New Technology: iPhone 6

Best New Apps: Yikyak & Yo

Best Verbatim submissions:

"You wanna know what happens in ASWWU?

You get laid." – Jono Pratt

Best Tweeter: @officialjaden

Best Quick Trend:

Ice Bucket Challenge

BEST OF2014

“I Should Just Stop Tweeting, The Human Consciousness Must

Raise Before I Speak My Juvenlile Philosphy”

PERSPECTIVEOPINION08

lemnahPerspective Editor

ALEX

“When an opinion dampens one’s drive to continue existing... it is a bad opinion”

This article is dedicated to my jungle

brother, Jason G.

In an effort to be consistent with this issue’s theme, “Best Of,” I was going to write up what were — in my opinion — the best opinions of 2014. The problem with doing this, however, is that there can never be one opinion better than another, right? We’ve all heard that “everyone is entitled to their own opinions,” and simple logic shows this to be true: if I expect to be able to form my own opinions, I have to grant that others are allowed their own as well. However, does this mean that all opinions are of equal worth, are of equal value, are equal? Are opinions like people (every one is different but equally valuable) or are opinions hierarchical?

Having managed the opinion column for one quarter, I think it is a good time to define what an opinion is. You will find that your dictionary defines an opinion as a “view” or “judgment” that informs how you perceive the world but that is not necessarily informed by the world you view — this is key. An opinion is never factual, though it can be influenced by facts. Instead, an opinion is a lens from which the world is viewed. Opinions are shades we put on that color the world in different ways. Keep in

mind, however, that when you put on blue shades nothing actually turns blue. Everything remains the same; it is just your perception of reality that shifts as non-blue objects appear blue.

Now that “opinion” has been more clearly defined, I would like you to consider once again whether some opinions are better than others. This boils down to, of course, your opinion of reality. There are a few different ways to look at the inherent goodness of an opinion, the value of a thing that shapes one’s relation to reality. If one were to believe that there are absolute truths — things innately real like heat and trees and maybe even love — then it seems to me that one would oppose opinions that distort what is real and/or cover up what is true. For example,

if love existed as an absolute truth and everyone in the world knew it except one person whose opinion of love masked its existence, it would be fair to categorize this person’s opinion as inferior (by nature of warping what is real) to the opinions held by the rest of the world. This is the first worldview: that there are truths and some opinions accurately reflect truth and others don’t.

There is also the slightly trickier second worldview in which one

doesn’t believe in such thing as truth. In this worldview, there are only material things that exist and that can be evidenced; all other “larger” interpretations of reality are only unsupportable theories that don’t deserve very serious consideration (being outside the realms of traditional science). You might think that in this worldview individual opinions could not be rated because any one view of reality is as valid as the next — nothing is actually true, therefore anything can be true. However, in this worldview opinions are even more liable to rating because, despite the fact that all opinions are equally valid, some still have better consequences than others. In this worldview, one opinion is better or worse than the next because it either encourages or discourages the continuation of life. And why should life be encouraged, you ask? Well if life is all there is — just pure existence — then it is the one thing that deserves guarding. Call it survival, call it perpetuating the evolution of the human race, call it a party, call it whatever you like; existence, by nature of existing, calls for continued existence.

When an opinion dampens one’s drive to continue existing (for example, the opinion that life sucks), it is a bad opinion in both worldviews; for, a life with absolute truth is a life that offers concrete and constructive purpose — this is good. A life with no particular truth offers one the opportunity to spend a life creating truth (and therefore discovering it) and this too is a concrete and constructive purpose — a good thing. A good opinion is therefore one that accounts for the goodness of life and clarifies just how much goodness is all around us. Imagine that we are all beings that are naturally born nearly blind to the truth of goodness. When you plop on the lens of “life is good” (i.e. adopt this opinion) you begin to notice how good life is. As the goodness of life comes into sharper focus, you

THEOPINION

Bestcan strengthen the lens and see more and more of what you are looking for: beauty, love, truth, goodness, and all the things that encourage more life and more of what is good.

There is, of course, a flip side. The opposite opinion can be adopted: life is not good. This lens paints everything to be painful and scary and uncomfortable. The badness of this lens expands on itself and all of life appears harmful and distasteful. The ultimate consequence of this

opinion of life is tragic indeed. Life will forever perpetuate itself until it is rejected. When one rejects their existence, existing becomes the sole enemy and death the solution. Adopting the opinion that life is not good has the power to extinguish the flame of life and leave behind only the wispy ghost of smoke. But enough of this — these are dynamics we are aware of deep in our guts, and the very fact that you are reading this right now suggests which side you are on: the side of life. You are living and are therefore camped on the side of goodness and joy, the side of fighting for good opinions. I suspect that if you fight for the good opinions and strive to adopt and shape them as your own, you will

find that life’s goodness keeps giving and growing in a profound way.

As we head into the warmth of the holidays and a new year, I challenge you to internalize opinions that excite you and encourage you to live a deeper and fuller life. This doesn’t start in 2015, this starts right now. In my opinion, life is good right now. And because life is good now I bet it will be good next year too. This is the beauty of a positive opinion: it informs the present, past, and future.

So is there one opinion better than all the rest? Yes. In my opinion, “life is good” is the best opinion and it isn’t just my opinion. I’m thankful to guys like Jesus and Jason who show me in their own way that heaven and life are synonymous when I choose to see them as such. If their opinion informs mine and mine informs yours and yours the rest of the world’s, then eventually life will be good in everyone’s opinion and everyone’s opinion will be the best opinion.

09RELIGIONOPINION

“Walk, don’t run.

That’s it.

Walk, don’t run. Slow down, breathe

deeply, and open your eyes, because

there’s a whole world right here within

this one [...] Efficiency is not God’s

highest goal for your life, neither is

busyness, or how many things you can

get done in one day, or speed, or even

success. But walking — which leads to

seeing — now that’s something. That’s

the invitation for every one of us today

and every day, in every conversation,

interaction, event, and moment: to walk,

not run. And in doing so, to see a whole

world right here within this one.”

— Rob Bell1

I really loaded up my schedule this quarter, and it was quite exciting. I was able to do many things that I love. The temptation was to let those appointments and due dates rule my week. Instead of seizing the day, it revolved around particular things I needed to get done or places I needed to be. When I do this, the days begin to run together and lose their distinctiveness and passion. The quarter is almost at a close and I’m reflecting on how it went, so here’s a few tips I learned along the way.

1. Know that you have time.

It is incredibly easy to dismiss important things in our life because we feel like we’re too busy. Everything begins to take over and become our immediate priority: the homework, the jobs, getting enough worship and CommUnity credit... However, we’re really only as busy as we believe ourselves to be; if there is something we really want to do or get done, we find the time and make it happen. Saying “I don’t have the time” is really saying “I’m not willing to put the time in because the other things I’m doing are more important.” Of course there are exceptions to just about any rule, but generally speaking, saying that we don’t have time is a convenient excuse.

2. Acknowledge your priorities.

In order to make time for the things that are most important for you, priorities must be established. Being productive isn’t about getting as many things done as possible. If my only reason for being at Walla Walla University was to get good grades, my GPA would be a bit higher than it is now. I’ve skipped class or stayed up too late because I was engrossed in a meaningful conversation — not many things are more important to me. I’m not advocating that you skip every class to do something else; rather, do what you are obligated to do, but be mindful of the things that really fill you with a sense of purpose and meaning. Friends are important, athletics are important, your hobbies are important. Seek God and seek Life wherever and whenever you see

them. Being productive with your life is about living in such a way that fulfills you and helps you fulfill the lives of others.

3. Never stop moving.

Movement is life. When anything lies dormant for too long it breaks down and is destroyed. That’s what we end up doing when we stop progressing and challenging ourselves to do better and to be better people. The biggest mistake I’ve made was letting my mistakes hold me back and hinder me from moving to a better a place. You are not the sum of your fears, mistakes, or regrets. There is always a path ahead and direction to continue traveling towards. 1 Taken from Pastor Rob Bell’s blog. Find him at robbellcom.tumblr.com

rameyReligion Writer

BENJAMIN

pinterest.com

A few weeks ago, a class I’m in went knocking on doors in our community. We were conducting a survey about the attitudes of people toward God and religion and one of the questions we asked was, “What is the first thing that comes to your mind when I say ‘God’?” After we finished this “field-trip” and I was looking over the responses to this question, I realized something: the vast majority of the answers either referenced God as the “supreme ruler” or as “savior.” These answers portray two very different things, don’t they? Which is a more accurate portrayal of God?

It didn’t take me long to realize that though these are two vastly different answers, both “supreme ruler” and

FROMSECRETS FALL

“savior” are, in one way or another, true. The difference is that each an-swer portrays an entirely different as-pect of God.

So what? What’s the point? Allow me to use a personal illustration. If someone asked you, “Do you know Randy Folkenberg?” Some of you might say, “Yeah, kinda. He writes for The Collegian.” True, isn’t it? Some of

you, however, would have some very different answers, saying, “He plays violin and sings,” “We play soccer to-gether,” “He’s a theology major,” “He’s my classmate,” or “He’s a good friend of mine.” Different people are going to have different answers. Why? Because people’s answers will reflect the rela-tionship they have with me and this relationship will vary depending on experience.

Now, think about the two vastly different terms that were associated with God considering how relation-ship varies depending on experience. It would make sense to say that these vastly different answers shed light on the respondant’s relationship with God. While this prognosis may not

fit in all situations, I would say that the people who thought of God as “supreme ruler” had less of a personal relationship with Him than someone who answered that God was “savior.” In fact, I would say that these people are missing the most important thing about God. Why do I say this? Here is why: Colossians 2:9 says, “For in Christ lives all the fullness of God...” (NLT). In other words, Jesus Christ is the best picture of God. So what type of God do we see when we look at Jesus? We see a God who is charac-terized by humility and unfathomable love and who’s focus is on our salva-tion and re-creation (John 3:16). In Je-sus, we see that God is not focused on making sure people know Him as the “supreme ruler” of the universe. God is

not about demanding control but is in-stead about offering freedom. God ex-ists not to rule, but to save. This is God and if you or I view God primarily as “supreme ruler,” we’ve got it all wrong. While God’s supremacy is undeniable, the closer we get to Him, the more we realize that His character is love, His passion is forgiveness, and His utmost desire is for our salvation.

Since that morning spent knocking on doors, I’ve done a lot of thinking and keep asking myself a few questions that I’d like for you to ask yourself: What is the first thing that comes to my mind when I hear the word ‘God’? Who is He to me? Is God my savior? If your answer is anything less, you’re missing the point.

“God is not about demanding control but is instead about offering freedom.”

THE POINTfolkenbergRANDY

Religion Writer

LIFEFOOD 10

I’d love to get feedback from you! If you have

any comments or suggestions for recipes

you’d like to see featured, send me

an email at rachel.peterson@ wallawalla.edu

CRANBERRIES AND WALNUTSHONEY NUT SQUASH

INGREDIENTS

:

1. 2 honey nut squash

2. 1 tsp. olive oil

3. ½ c. fresh cranberries

4. ¼ c. walnuts

5. ½ tsp. ground cinnamon

6. 1 tbsp. maple syrup‘Tis the season for...

winter squash! These baked honey nut

squash would make a lovely addition to

Christmas or Christmas Eve dinner and will

definitely impress all the relatives.

PETERSONRACHEL

Food Writer

WIT

Hfoodgawker.com

First, heat oven to 400o F. Cut squashes in half, lengthwise. Next, scoop out the seeds and strings and discard. Rub olive oil on the outside of the squash, then bake for 20 minutes with the cut sides down. When cool enough to touch, scoop out the flesh of the squash leaving just enough remaining inside so that the shells do not collapse. Mash the squash flesh with a fork and mix with the rest of the ingredients. Spoon the mixture evenly back into the squash shells and eat.

INSTRUCTIONS

FeatureRECIPE BAKED HONEY NUT SQUASH

Photos and adapted recipe from becauseyum.com

SUPPLIES

A SIMPLE CHRISTMAS

11TRAVEL/SPORTSLIFE

“Do you think she’s awake?”

“She sleeps a lot. I don’t under-stand.”

“What I don’t understand is why you guys are awake at 8 A.M. on Christmas morning,” I moaned from under my pillow.

“Because it’s Christmas day!” squealed the girl I was traveling with.

As I rolled off the pull-out-couch and zombie-walked to make my daily dose of coffee, I realized how fatigued I was. We were staying in an apart-ment in Münich, our fourth stop in our three-week break. I was exhaust-ed, and I’m ashamed to say that I want-ed to go back to school — I had taken in so much in the last two weeks, and I was down to my last nerve with my traveling buddy.

Christmas Day: outside, it was 40o and gray. We started the Christmas music while making cream cheese and fruit paninis from a recipe off Pinter-est. Afterwards, we made gingerbread houses, but here’s the catch — Ger-many sells gingersnaps, not graham crackers. I’m not even sure we made

the frosting right, because it was all in German, and as French students we couldn’t even pretend to know what it was saying. Needless to say, they weren’t very extravagant works of art. I did a “replica” of the Branden-burg Gate because the wafer cookies we were using wouldn’t stick to the frosting. We sang songs that evening, but the only ones that the guy who was renting us the apartment could play were songs by Coldplay or John-ny Cash.

When you’re going on a trip with a friend, it’s almost like you’re getting a mission from Anthony Hopkins: “Your mission, if you choose to accept, is travel with this person for an ex-tended amount of time, and come back in one piece, together.” Traveling with someone you know really forc-es you to reevaluate your friendship; you’ll come out for the better or for the worse. People aren’t kidding when they tell you to travel with your future spouse — you will see that person for who they really are.

As we sang “Ring of Fire,” I noticed that it didn’t feel like Christmas — not because of the song, but because I wasn’t happy. It’s different when you’re angry with family members — they’re family — but when you’re not with people you love, it’s hard to enjoy the Christmas spirit. This is the one day that every hard feeling should be put aside; you should really take in your surroundings because so much can happen in a year. Merry Christmas!

pierceSHANNON

Travel Writer

10. Sochi Olympics. Everyone remembers the 2014

Winter Olympics, right? They are a bit of a distant memory, but there were definitely some cool things that happened. The U.S hockey team beat Russia in a crazy preliminary round match. Olympic rules allowed T. J. Oshie to shine and put the U.S. on top with his shootout goals.

9. World Cup Soccer. It only happens every four years, so

the experience in and of itself deserves to be here. There were several intense matches that took place, including the U.S. defeating Ghana thanks to a late goal by John Brooks. Also included in the American World Cup experience: a Portugal goal off a ridiculous Cristiano Ronaldo pass and a Tim Howard superhuman effort against Belgium.

8. UCONN Basketball. The University of Connecticut

won some championships this year. The team that everyone always expects to win won, as did the team nobody believed in. Breanna Stewart and the women’s team capped off a 40-0 season with a championship, and Shabazz Napier led the Huskies through an improbable tournament run for a win of their own.

7. Mo’Ne Davis. When I first saw her on ESPN, I

couldn’t believe what I was watching. It wasn’t the fact that she was a girl, competing among boys in the Little League World Series – it was that she was dominating. Her overpowering 70 mph fastball helped lead her team to a deep run in the LLWS.

6. Martin St. Louis, LA Kings & Playoff Hockey.

The Stanley Cup Playoffs are the most grueling, hard-nosed event that professional sports has to offer. Every

year, players battle with bruised backs, broken bones, and other injuries in the quest for the Cup. This year, Martin St. Louis played with a heavy heart following the death of his mother. The team rallied around him as they took down Pittsburgh, and then Montreal to reach the finals. While the story line was very special, the on-ice product in the finals was pretty great as well. The Los Angeles Kings beat the Rangers in double overtime of game five to win the Stanley Cup.

5. Derek Jeter. Say what you want about the

fanfare surrounding Jeter during his last season, but his final game in Yankee Stadium was pretty glorious. Jeter was an icon to me growing up. He was a champion, an all-star, and the reason why so many kids wanted to play shortstop and wear number 2. While the Yankees’ season didn’t go as planned, Jeter’s final game in New York was important. It looked like the Yankees were going to win the game. Jeter had already completed his final at-bat, until David Robertson blew the save. The scoreboard read 4-4, bottom of the ninth, one out, man on second, and here comes Jeter. First pitch, Jeter hits it past the first baseman. Ballgame. Yankees win. He came through again, in his final moment.

4. Richard Sherman. Yes, the Seahawks won the Super

Bowl, but the NFC championship against the 49ers was the better game. You might remember that nobody should ever try Sherman with “a sorry receiver like Crabtree again,” but do you remember that the 49ers probably should have won that game? The play where Jermaine Kearse caught the ball short of the goal line, and was stripped by Navarro Bowman whose ACL was tearing while he was taking possession would have changed everything. But due to replay rules, it wasn’t reviewable, and the Seahawks scored to take the lead. The rest is history, and the legend of Richard Sherman continues to grow.

3. Madison Bumgarner & the San Francisco Giants.

I still don’t think this was talked about as much as it should have been, but wow, what a World Series! Giants pitcher Madison Bumgarner put together what is possibly one of the

greatest World Series performances in history. Three appearances, two starts, one complete game shutout, one save, 17 strikeouts, 0.43 earned run average, and a World Series ring. Truly remarkable.

2. The San Antonio Spurs. “It went Ginobli, Mills, Duncan,

Diaw — in that order. Ginobli threw a no-look pass to Mills that is still fooling me. That play is everything that is right about the NBA.”1 Those are the words from NBA writer Zach Lowe who broke down a play the Spurs offense ran. Everything the Spurs did on their run to the tile last year felt right. Coming off a brutal loss to Miami the year before, they got the band back together and made right the wrong, obliterating Miami in the Finals this year. I don’t have time here to say everything I want to about the Spurs, so be sure to YouTube search “The San Antonio Spurs, The Beautiful Game”2 if you haven’t already and enjoy one of top sporting spectacles of 2014.

1. Sports for Humanity. Every year there are several stories

that might not involve the biggest names, or the biggest stages, but they really matter, and they make a difference. This year, we learned the story of Bengals player Devon Still and his young daughter, Leah, who is battling pediatric cancer. We watched as Lauren Hill, a DIII women’s basketball recruit with an inoperable brain tumor got a chance to play in a college game and score a basket. Even though I can never emotionally handle these type of stories, I observed as 11-year-old Austin Sides came out to throw the first pitch at a Royals game. Unbeknownst to Austin, his father, Air Force Major Robert Sides who had been away serving for the past year, was in catcher’s gear behind the plate. After receiving the pitch, Major Sides took off the mask, and Austin ran into his arms. Thank you 2014, for all the great moments in, and out of the game.1http://grantland.com/the-triangle/the-lowe-post-podcast-zach-lowe-jeff-van-gundy/

2https://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=tNZvNs6r800

BEST IN SPORTS: 2014

wagnerSports Writer

ALEX

christmas fashionONLINE

freevectorgraphics.org

LIFEFASHION 12

SHOPPING GUIDE Christmas is nearly around the corner, and in case you forgot while you were busy stressing out about the end of winter quarter, NOW is the time to start shopping for those you love. If you are planning on online shopping, you want to make sure to start early to ensure your merchandise will arrive before Santa does, and to avoid expedited shipping fees. I have put together some little Christmas shopping tips to ease the process. Note that since so many people are shopping this time of year, I cannot guarantee any of these products will be available by the time this issue is published and you jump on your computers to shop.

Baublebar.com has some absolutely lovely costume jewelry that would be the perfect Christmas gift or stocking stuffer. At full price it can get a bit pricey. To avoid that, check out their Happy Hour jewelry and special buried baubles, which are a few select items that are significantly marked down and “buried” on the sight. They are never hard to find because they always pop up in the “What’s New” section. Also, another great reason to shop Baublebar is that they have free shipping both ways and first time customers get 15% off when you sign up for their email. Score!

BAUBLEBAR

Looking for unconventional gifts? Shoplatitude.com is the place to shop for special items from countries around the world without having to hop on a plane. They have some very unique jewelry that’s worth checking out. Definitely the place to look for one-of-a-kind items!

SHOP LATITUDEMany of you may not actually know

this but Nordstromrack.com does exist. Everything you love about Nordstrom Rack can be accessed from anywhere. Great gifts can be found here for both ladies and gentlemen. I particularly like to shop here for shoes!

NORDSTROM RACK

One of the biggest online fashion retailers, Asos is the perfect place to search for Christmas gifts as they have a range of products at all prices for women and men. Their shipping is super easy — they automatically provide a return label sticker with every purchase. You really can’t go wrong. If you don’t like it, just send it back at no cost. Want in on a little secret? Sometimes I order a bunch of things on Asos.com knowing that not everything will be to my liking, and send back the items I don’t want. It’s a way to get around the main reason people have a problem with online shopping. Also, sign up for the 10% student discount!

ASOS

FOR THE MENFOR THE LADIES

Baublebar, Zen Gem Pendant, was $32,

NOW $10

Shop Latitude, The Base Project,

Black Upcycled Kunene Cattle Bracelet from Africa, $32

Nordstrom Rack, Kickers Riviero Derby,

$54.97

Baublebar, Pharaoh Bib, was $42,

NOW $20

Shop Latitude, Small Blue Floral Basket

from Marrakech, $20

Nordstrom Rack, Cowboys of Norway

Perforated Leather Belt, $39.97

Nordstrom Rack, Dolce Vita Ankle Strap Heel,

$49.97

Shop Latitude, Teardrop Square Bangle from

Mumbai, $30

ASOS, Contemporary

Menswear Book, $37.81

Nordstrom Rack, Modern Rush Judy Ankle

Bootie, $39.97

ASOS, Leather Asym-metric Clutch Bag with

Double Lock, $39.80

ASOS, Simon Carter Houndstooth Cufflinks,

$47.38

hartwickALYSSA

Fashion Writer

13CW/CWPERSPECTIVE

WISDOMCollegian

Man jailed for punching £10 million Monet

painting.

It gave him the wrong impression.

Satanic temple display approved for

state Capitol

Still a better love story than Twilight

Florida college accused of using strippers to

lure new students

They’re just looking for singles.

TGI Friday’s implements “kiss

cam” drones

They come armed with mistletoe

(seriously).videovimeo.com/aswwu

A Very Merry Dead Week An original, yet familiar medley about Christmas

and the craziest week of the quarter.

If you’d like to submit your poetry, prose,

songs, or any kind of creative writing, email me at abigail.wissink@

wallawalla.edu

WRITINGCreative

wissinkABIGAIL

Creative Curator

Yakuza member arrested for possession

of 17 kg of salt

In other news, remains of Lot’s wife recovered.

Teetering on the edge she stands.

Leaning forward, pitching back.

Overcome by the height, overwhelmed with the fall.

Each fiber says jump, every nerve says take flight.

But commitment she lacks to leap or to fight.

Hard ground runs soft as reality fades.

Looking for reasons, any purpose to stay.

She looks to the future, that famed beacon of hope,

But finds only shadows beneath its dark cloak.

To the past she turns where meaning once was,

Instead met with empty, meaningless, non.

The present looms heavy, ominous, deep

choices to make and commitments to find.

A frame left in turmoil, a soul undefined.

So where will she go, what step will she take?

Can’t linger forever.

Darkness waits.

Spinning and whirling, a directionless fight.

Swing once to the left, and then to the right.

Each punch makes no difference, no jab carries force.

Rendering our champion full of remorse.

Why fight a battle that carries no win?

Spinning and whirling, the torment within.

Each slug takes more effort than our champ can bare.

She struggles for breath, simply looking for air.

Her back to the wall our champ takes a rest,

to re-group, assess, a priority check.

This battle she’s fighting is not hers to hold.

The war is won, the final victor been told.

Naked and bleeding from the cross He hung,

Spelled out in red, the depth of His love.

So lay down your weapons, retract your fists.

Take up new life, find freedom in this.

Your debt has been paid, the guilt is no more.

All the spinning and whirling,

let it fall to the floor.

Christ wishes freedom in the midst of your fight.

So pick up and take the hope that is right. Find rest in the darkness that fills up the night.

Accept and reclaim life in His sight.

By Katie Palumbo

THE CLIFF THE FIGHT

Thursdays at 9:00pm.

LIFESCIENCE 14

Bigger might not be better, but it is more awesome. While most people have a good idea of what buildings are the tallest, there are many other engi-neering feats across disciplines that are just as impressive. Let’s look at few:

5: Tallest StructuresAs opposed to the normal “Tallest

Building,” and “Tallest Freestanding Structure,” lists, the tallest structure list doesn’t care about how a structure gets to it’s height, meaning that the structures do not have to be enter-able by humans and can have guy wires to help them achieve their height. The interesting thing about this list is how relatively easy it is to get on it as opposed to the other lists. The 4th member of this list, the KVLY-TV mast was built in 1963 for a measly $3,851,630 in today’s dollars.*

1 - Burj Khalifa — Dubai, UAE - 2772 ft.

2 - Tokyo Skytree — Tokyo, Japan- 2080 ft.

3 - Shanghai Tower — Shanghai, China- 2074 ft.

4 - KVLY-TV mast — North Dakota, USA- 2063 ft.

5 - KXJB-TB mast — North Dakota, USA- 2060 ft.

*Someone should start a Kickstarter

to get the good ol’ USA at the top of this

list yet again. Even if it cost 2-3 times the

price of the KVLY-TV mast, it would be

well within the range of a high-profile

crowd-funding campaign. Of course,

someone would have to persuade the FAA

to approve a structure greater than 2,000

feet, but I’m sure they’d understand.

4: Voluminous BuildingsThere are many other measures

for largest buildings, like the amount of floorspace and building footprint, which are interesting lists in their own right, but volume is one of the simplest ways of thinking of the size of buildings. This list is notable for including many buildings used in the construction of large vehicles (number 6, not shown, is the NASA Vehicle Assembly building, which is so tall it generates its own weather).

1 - Boeing Everett Factory — Everett, Washington, USA - 472 million cubic ft.

2 - Target Import Warehouse — Lacey, Washington, USA - 262.4 million cubic ft.

3 - Jean-Luc Lagardere Plant — Toulouse-Blagnac, France - 199 million cubic ft.

4 - Tropical Islands Resort — Hal-be, Germany - 184 million cubic ft.

5 - Meyer Werft Dockhalle 2 — Papenburg, Germany - 167 million cubic ft.

3: Fastest Vehicles in AirIt’s difficult to reasonably compare

the fastest human-built objects, since many of our deep-space spacecraft achieve really high velocities, but are so far from Earth that using it as a reference frame doesn’t really make sense. So for the fastest human-built objects, we’ll instead use a metric that applies in the earth — the place people actually live. So the list here will be the fastest objects in air. For reference, the speed of a typical bullet is 761 mph.

1 - Apollo capsule — 24,790 mph

2 - Space Shuttle — 17,500 mph

3 - HTV-2 Falcon — 13,201 mph

4 - NASA X-43A — 7,546 mph

5 - North American X-15 — 4,519 mph

2: Most Powerful Power-Plants

The most powerful power-plants are, for the most part, dams. That’s not to say all of them are dams — there are six nuclear and three fossil fuels plants in the top 20. It does seem, however, that dams are of necessity bigger in order to get the most of the potential energy supplied by a specific section of water. The most notable dam on this list is the Three Gorges Dam, which is controversial for flooding a large area which was the home of 1.3 million people and much history.

1 - Three Gorges Dam — China - 22,500 MW

2 - Itaipu Dam — Brazil & Paraguay - 14,000 MW

3 - Xiluodu Dam — China - 13,860 MW

4 - Guri Dam — Venezuela - 10,235 MW

5 - Tucurui Dam — Brazil - 8,370 MW

1: Most Powerful

SupercomputersLast, but not least,

is the most powerful super computers, as measured in FLOPS. A FLOP is a fun-ny-sounding mea-sure of how many floating-point opera-tions a computer can perform in a second. If that still doesn’t make much sense, a floating point num-ber is just a number with a set (usually

small) number of known digits set to an exponent. 3.14 is a floating point number while pi is not, 10.0 is a float-ing point number while 10 is not. So a FLOP is basically just a single nu-merical calculation done in the same way as a calculator, and FLOPS is the measure of how many of those can be done in one second. For reference, a mid-range Intel Core i5 processor can produce about 20 Gigaflops.1

1 - NUDT Tianhe 2 — China - 33.9 Petaflops

2 - Cray Inc. Titan — USA - 17.6 Petaflops

3 - IBM Sequoia — USA - 17.2 Petaflops

5 LISTS OF 5

hulseDANIEL

Science & Tech Writer

4 - Fujitsu K Computer — Japan - 10.5 Petaflops

5 - IBM Mira — USA- 8.59 Peta-flops

0: Other cool lists not on this list

5 - List of Largest Clock Faces

4 - Buldings With the Largest Floorspace

3 - Tallest Bridges

2 - Largest Reserviors

1 - Countries with the Highest Qualities of Life.

1 http://setiathome.berkeley.edu/cpu_list.php

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MUTUALLY-ASSURED DESTRUCTION

the Other Cheek

HaikuVERBATIM

INTERVIEW

“Let’s not do acid, let’s have prayer.”- Prof. Beck

““

REVIEW

“Tongue is optional.”- Casey Roosma, on a lab procedure

The stakes are being raised this week! With the end of the quarter comes a gift from me. I’d like to thank each person who has participated in the

Haiku Review by making it a bit more interesting this week. The first two people to correctly guess the answer to the riddle will receive a free

ticket to the production These Shining Lives for one of the last three performances. Email me your guesses at

Abigail.Wissink@wallawalla.edu!What are you

most excited to do over break?

“I was a little liberal with the alcohol.”- Prof. Bergherm, on applying vinyl

wissinkABIGAIL

Backpage Writer

I am everywhereBut I am not always seen

I could be your fall

(or winter). Do youknow who I am? I will not

ease up very soon.If you hear something funny, cringe-worthy, or that could be hilarious out of context, send the quote to me! abigail.wissink@wallawalla.edu

Last week’s answer: University Church BellsLast week’s winner: Bryndi Goodlin

“See my family.” - Drew Perkins

“I am excited to waste a whole bunch of time on YouTube.”

- Cedric Johnson

“Probably sleep. For unhealthy amounts of time. Like literally I will stay in bed for 14 hours.”

- Sam Mattson

“It’s so delightful deciding not to care.” - Andrea Johnson

On a ride home from school when I was 10, I asked my mom to explain the difference between Republicans and Democrats. When she said she was a Republican, I decided that I was too and didn’t really think about it again until high school. By that point, my parents had both decided they affiliated with neither political party, and all three of us looked at our media a bit more critically.

I was home for a few weeks this summer during the initial protests against the killing of Michael Brown, and my parents taught me some important things about our media in the United States. I had already formed my opinions on the matter, as I had been keeping up to date on the issue from social media posts while the media ban was still in effect, but once that ban was lifted, it was on the news every few minutes. I spent a bit of time trying to tell my parents what I thought was actually going on, and then they showed me a new trick they had learned. They sat me down in front of the television and switched back and forth between a liberal news station, where the peace train1

and clips of protestors saying “Hands up, don’t shoot” were looped as they discussed the travesty that had unfolded, and a conservative news station, where clips of graffiti and burning buildings were looped as they discussed the rioting thugs. The story was completely different on either station, and it made me wonder: if we only listen to one side of the story, how much will we learn?

Paying attention to the other side of the story won’t necessarily be enough, however. Our political backgrounds can have a huge effect on how we perceive everyone else and can keep us from thinking that their arguments are legitimate. For instance, on that same visit home to my parents, they showed me a new game they had started playing with each other. They would switch to a certain conservative news station that my father loves to hate and would count how many seconds it took for them to mention our president negatively. Not segments, not minutes. Seconds. I didn’t think this game was going to be very fruitful, but he convinced me to try. 15 seconds in, they

discussed Obama’s family vacation and insinuated that he was wasting precious time as president. A minute and a half later, during a commercial, he was brought up again. 30 seconds back into the show, he was mentioned yet again, and this is where I gave up and asked my dad to turn off the TV.

As we see political discussions play out over social media (or even the Christmas dinner table), it’s important to remember that the person who may be driving you crazy because they just don’t understand your side has probably consumed entirely different media from what you have. Conservative and liberal media and everything in between have a certain slant that may not be visible if it’s the only media source you consume. Try to remember this the next time you feel compelled to start an argument at the table, over coffee, or on Facebook.

1http://www.buzzfeed.com/yezminvillarreal/this-peace-train-rolled-through-ferguson-during-the-protests