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Jay KernerPublisher/Urban Pioneer

A couple of months ago, I was brainstorming with a buddy who was low on cash but needing a new housing situation.

I’d heard the county had some kind of property liquidation program and went to the courthouse for the list of what was available.

Not much.It was a fairly long list but almost everything was marked sold be-

cause it was last year’s list.A nice lady in the office told me to check back sometime next month

because the new list would be coming out. My buddy and I looked at the few still available and quickly learned why they were.

But I happened to be in the courthouse a month later and was told the new list would be out the next day at 9am.

I got there at 9:15, picked up the list, and found that a large number of the properties with houses on them were already claimed, with some of the same names on multiple addresses.

I asked about the process and learned that all that was required to claim a property was to be the first one to put your name on it. Some of the properties even had multiple names in backup positions.

The paperwork wouldn’t come for a couple of weeks, so the eventual buyer didn’t even have to come up with any money to reserve a property. What a deal!

I was 15 minutes late and the chase was on for what was left.It was pure fluke that I found the barn.It wasn’t where I thought I was looking. I saw a beautiful vacant lot

where a house had obviously once stood. It was listed for $158. I hurried back downtown to get more info.

Turns out the piece for sale wasn’t what I’d been looking at. The piece for sale was the patch of weeds and woods behind that lot. I wondered if my buddy could put a modular home on it and went back to take another look. I parked at the road and waded through the weeds.

And there it was.A barn.Good size but not particularly fancy like some are. A little

worse for wear, but not all falling down either.The windows were out and a board was missing here or there,

but the metal roof was ok and the fieldstone foundation was excel-lent.

And people pay good money for barn lumber.I never claimed to be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I

knew enough to hustle my butt back downtown again and get my name on that list before anybody else figured it out.

When the paperwork came back, we showed up early with cash and proof of our paid property taxes.

Ten minutes of “buyer beware” stuff and it was ours. For $158.The county folks couldn’t have been nicer and the whole pro-

cess was easy. We hope to work with them next year to promote it in advance, so more folks know about it. We’d also love to see how we can encourage more owner/occupiers in the houses if we can.

But for now, we could finally go inside our new purchase and really see it.

It was a horse barn. Stalls below, hay above. Plenty of the as-sociated by-products knee-deep on the floor.

A barn is unlike most other structures in that you can step inside and see its’ bones. The posts and the beams, the rafters and the joists, all likely harvested from the trees cleared to put it up, and milled on site over a century ago.

Beautiful in its simplicity and its utility.I stood under the lofted roof and took it all in.I thought about the people who raised it, back when you probably

couldn’t see your nearest neighbor from there.I bet they had barn dances in it.I imagine it as home to ponies that carried kids to school.It may have housed horses that plowed the surrounding fields before

they eventually gave way to development.Over the next century plus, the land was divided and divided again

until finally, just a tiny postage stamp with the barn on it remained.And there it sat, neglected and forgotten, until the taxes finally

backed up enough for the county to take action.And now through some incredibly lucky timing, it’s ours!But we decided we don’t have the heart to tear it down. It’s not that

far gone yet, and we think it’s worth saving.We don’t know what we’ll do with it but for now we’re cleaning it

out and sealing it up for winter. Then we’ll see.Maybe I’ll store my motorcycle in it. Maybe the grandkids will play

there.Maybe we’ll have barn dances.

We Bought a Barn

Excitement is high as the Voices of America chorus prepares for their annual holiday concert – A Holiday Party Concert! A full lineup of great entertainment will bring you holiday cheer and incredible music on Saturday, December 12 at the Paradox Theater in downtown St. Joseph. Choose from two shows, at 2:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. or come to both as each show will be slightly different. The shows will feature performances by the Voices of America cho-rus, local barbershop quartet favorites BassLine and Old Standards, along with gospel quartet Spirit Revival. In addition, Liz Goller and Jaylene Scott will be joining this talented lineup on the evening show.

The Voices of America are excited to offer the community this entertaining line up as they produce this show in the wake of great success and improvement for the chorus over the past year. This concert continues the dawning of a new day for the Voices of America chorus. The Voices of America will present their holiday repertoire under the direction and musical leadership of Steve Scott.

A Holiday Party Concert, presented by the Voices of America chorus with shows at 2:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. Saturday, December 12 at the Paradox Theater, 107 N. 6th Street, St Joseph, MO. The Paradox Theater is in a beautifully restored building in downtown St Joseph. It’s a small venue, seating is limited so get your tickets early.

Tickets are available on-line at www.vchorus.com or from Voices of America chorus members, or at the Allied Arts Council office. Tickets prices are In Advance: $15/adults or $10/students or at the Door: $20/adults or $15/stu-dents, group pricing is available for groups of 10 or more.

Dear Joe,Join us downtown at Felix Street Square as we officially usher

in the holiday season with an evening of Christmas cheer. Enjoy live Christmas music at the gazebo, visit and have your photo taken with Santa Claus, and take a ride in a horse drawn sleigh on the evening of Saturday December 5th. The St. Joseph Downtown Association and The Saint Joseph Downtown Community Improve-ment District, along with area businesses and churches, have come together to fund and organize the evening’s events, which will also include a craft booth, storytelling by St. Joseph librarian Will Stuck, and the lighting of The Mayor’s Christmas tree. It’s also a great night to take a stroll around downtown and see the holiday window displays decorated by the downtown businesses, and to see firsthand all of the new lights and decorations added this year. Bring the en-tire family back downtown to shop at the locally owned stores and restaurants, and help grow this fun tradition!

Dear Joe,

The Regular Joephone 816-617-5850

read us online at www.theregularjoepaper.com

email us at email@theregularjoepaper.com

snail mail us at The Regular Joe

Cafe’ Acoustic 2605 Fred.ALL SHOWS 9:30pm unless noted Dec 2 OPEN MIC hosted by Lory Lacy w/Daniel ChampagneDec 4 Shoot 4 Wednesday & Thousand Years WideDec 5 Open Mic hosted by Lory LacyDec 10 Christgen “Binky” Soloman & Sex-wolphDec 11 Tyler Harman The Philistines & Violet & the UndercurrentsDec 12 Rock 4 Tots event: admission = 1 NEW toy or $3for Noyes HomeBERG, Watching the Fall, The Devil and the Southern Fellowship & Kadanyne 9pmDec 16 Open Mic hosted by Lory LacyDec 18 Dave Matthews tribute - Band 41 @10pmDec 19 Zale Bledsoe, Sexwolph, Tyler HarmanGastown Lamps & Scruffy and the Janitors 9pmDec 20 PLAY DEAD @8pmDec 24 OPEN Christmas EVE 6pm-11pmDec 25 OPEN 6pm-130am. Christmas Vacation WATCH PARTY Dec 26 GRIT & 2 Miles Deep Dec 31 NYE Mascarade Karaoke Ball No Cover

The Lucky Tiger718 FrancisFirst Saturday with live music all afternoon.

Eagles Lodge N. Belt Hwy.Friday, Dec. 4th Swift Kik’s 36th Annivers. Show

Amnesia Too - St. Joe Ave.Sat. Dec 5th Friends and Family

Moila Country Club701 N. Noyes Blvd.New Year’s Eve with Phil Vandel $10 General Admission ($15 the day of), $20 re-served seating and $150 for a table of 10 reserved

Tues 12/1 Open JamWed 12/2 Walking Sticks and Island of Misfit ToysThurs 12/3 Colby WalterFri 12/4 Freight Train Rabbit KillerSat 12/5 Amanda FishMon 12/7 Amalgam JazzTues 12/8 Open JamWed 12/9 Thanksgiving PotluckThurs 12/10 Jason Riley w/Dan BlissFri 12/11 Page IISat 12/12 Winter Art FaireTue 12/15 Open JamThurs 12/17 Jeff LuxFri 12/18 Matt Clinkenbeard and Matt Cook CollectiveSat 12/19 Robo HopsTues 12/22 Open JamWed 12/23 Tracy HuffmanThurs 12/24 Customer Appreciation Partyw/TJ Ernhardt of the Nace Bros. 5-8pmFri 12/25 Closed for ChristmasSat 12/26 Boxing Day ShowTues 12/29 Open JamWed 12/30 Tracy HuffmanThurs 12/31 New Year’s Eve withFriends and Family

St. Joseph Live Music Highlights

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Mug Shots

Our stops this month included the newDooley Room at East Hills Mall.(photos on right)We hope you have an opportunity to visit. You’ll see some cool, original, artwork and meet a cool, original, human. And as always, a sincere thanks to all you Joe’s who support local art-ists of every sort, especially dur-ing this holiday season!

See anyoneyou know?

Tell ‘emyou sawtheir mugs in The RegularJoe!

The holiday decorations are going up, the weather is getting cooler, and Santa’s been making his list and checking it twice….all signs that it’s time for our annual Breakfast with Santa and Chil-dren’s Holiday Workshop! Join us at the Albrecht-Kemper on Sat-urday, December 5th as Santa’s pancakes are served hot off the griddle with sausage, juice, cof-fee, and a special treat for the kids! Breakfast will be served from 9:00 – 11:00 am. Call the museum to reserve your spot with the time you’d like to come and the number in your party.

Stay and help Santa’s elves at the Gingerbread Workshop. Handmake your own gingerbread house with icing and goodies that you pick out. (2 workshops avail-able 10:00 am and 11:30 am)

Seating is limited and Res-ervations are required for both breakfast and the workshop.

Cost is $10 per person for Breakfast and $10 per child for the workshop.For more information call 816-233-7003 or go to www.albrecht-kemper.org

Breakfast with Santa at Albrecht-Kemper Saturday, December 5th

Any heart attack survivor carries in his pocket or her purse a small brown bottle of sublingual white pills that can spell the difference between angina pectoris (chest pain caused by insuf-ficient circulationto the coronary arteries) and comfort. The medicine is called nitroglycer-ine and it is prescribed by cardiologists because of its ability to produce nitric oxide in the body. Nitric oxide is a powerful vasodilator, a substance that widens the arteries and veins, thereby increasing circulation and relieving pain and shortness of breath. And although nitroglycerine has been around since its development in 1847, the exact mechanism of how its end prod-uct, nitric oxide, operates in the bodywas not discovered until the 1990s when three American pharmacological researchers, working separately,were awarded the Nobel Prize for Physiology and Medicine in 1998 for figuring it out. Nitric oxide acts a a signal molecule in the body, affecting not only the cardiovascular system, but also the immune and neurological systems by increasing oxygen delivery. It is most well known for its ef-fects on the cardiovascular system, however, since heart disease remains the nation’s number-one killer among both men and women. Fortunately, you don’t have to survive a heart attack and get a prescription for nitroglycerin to increase nitric oxide production in your body, which, by the way, decreases with both disease and aging. The amino acids, L-arginine and L-Citruline together synthe-size nitric oxide as does grape seed extract and garlic to some extent. All of these supplements are available

over the counter without a prescription. If you would like to know more about nitric oxide, you can log onto www.cardiovideos.info for more information. Life’s Fortune, one of the companies that we deal with at A-Z, distributes an exclusive arginine nitric oxide formula called Life’s Cardio,and we will be happy to provide an information sheet about it to anyone who comes into the store. For anyone who has survived a heart attack or wants to prevent one, the benefits and availability of nitric oxide in supplement form is good news!

Yours for a Healthy Heart,

James Fly Certified Health Coach(Institute for Integrative Nutrition)

Saying Yes to “NO”Joe Health pg. 11

Tobiason Stained Glass Studio, 302 S. 8th St., St. Joseph, Missouri is hosting a book launch party featuring local authors on December 5th, 2015 from 6 to 9 p.m. with refreshments and door prizes. The event is free and open to the public.

Four authors, including Robert Christiansen, Marilyn Weimer, Sharon Spiegel and Rachel Riley, all with Amazing Things Press of St. Joseph, will be launching their new releases. The books, which include three adult nov-els, will be available for sale with personalized autographs by the authors. Several other local authors, many from the St. Joseph Writers Guild, will be

also on hand signing and selling their books.St. Joseph’s own Rob Calloway, World

Boxing Foundation Heavyweight Champion, among other titles, will be signing his new autobiography Rob Calloway: All American Prizefighter, published by Amazing Things Press as well. Calloway had 92 total fights, 76 wins (60 by knockout), 14 losses, and 2 draws. He has held the World Boxing Council Continental Americas Title, the WBA and IBF International titles. His World Heavyweight Championship win over Bob Mirovic in Aus-tralia, on the Gold Coast, for the World Box-ing Foundation heavyweight championship was designated the 2005 Fight of the Year by Fox Sports (Australia). Calloway has fought on HBO Europe, PPV, Showtime, Fox Sports

and on ESPN 6 times, winning Five.Rob Calloway took the name of the All American Prize Fighter after his

adopted hometown of St Joseph, Missouri won an All American City Award in 1996. Rob has received a Key to the city and a Day in Honor from his adopted hometown.

Calloway has fought in over 20 different states and 10 times outside of the USA in 8 different countries: 2X in Germany and 2X in Australia, Den-mark, England, Poland, Bahamas, China, and Russia. He has faced some of the world’s most famous boxers, including former heavyweight champions Hasim Rahman, Shannon Briggs, and Russia’s Ruslan Chagaev two times with the first being a Technical Draw on Showtime. Chagaev knocked out Calloway in two rounds in the rematch in Germany in his fight before win-ning the WBA World Heavyweight Championship. Calloway is a Boxing Hall of Fame candidate, who will be eligible in 2022.

Calloway’s autobiography is a fascinating and insightful look into the world of boxing, interspersed with inspiring glimpses into his personal life.

Hors d’oeuvres, including a chocolate fountain, and drinks will be served. Find out more at www.tobiasonstudio.com or www.amazingthing-spress.com.

Book Launch Party Dec 5th atGlass Eye Gallery

Complete Dell and GatewayDesktop Systems

$129

One of our favorite things here at The Regular Joe, is connecting our friends with our other friends. Most of the time it’s as simple as passing on a name and a number, but once in a while it’s a little more involved.

About a month ago we got a call from our friends at Laptop Liquida-tors. They’re the guys who buy returned-from-lease computer equipment by the pallet load, rehab ‘em and resell ‘em for a fraction of retail. You’ve probably seen their ad in these pages, and regular readers know about their monthly computer give-away that we worked with them on through the summer.

Now they told us about a really large purchase of good quality desk-top units and how they wanted to do something even bigger for the holiday season.

They felt their business has grown through their association with our paper and offered us 40 complete computer systems to give away to local families! WOW!

The only rub was, they wanted us to figure out who should get them.No way, Jose!We’ve been down that road before, and let me tell you, it’s no fun

trying to choose between numerous worthy recipients. Yes to this one and No to all the others. It was hard enough picking one winner a month. We were grateful for the generous offer, but weren’t anxious to tackle such a big project.

Luckily, we know some folks that take on one of the biggest seasonal giving challenges every year, in the AFL-CIO’s Adopt-A-Family Christ-mas Program.

We connected our friends with our other friends and got the heck out

of the way. Now we’re sitting here with pictures in our heads of Christmas morn-

ings all over town. And families that maybe thought a home computer was beyond their grasps, finding one under the tree.

Stop by any of the public libraries during the day and see the adults on the computers. Seeking information like so many of us take for granted . Stop by during after-school hours and see the kids on them. Doing home-work or just goofing around. Access to a computer is practically a neces-sity in modern life and the lack of one in the home puts every member of the family at a decided disadvantage.

But thanks to the generosity of a local St. Joe company, and a hard working organization trying to help local families at Christmas, 40 of those families are going to get computers this year. We think that’s awe-some!

We’d also like to suggest that anyone in a position to help, please remember the AFL-CIO’s Adopt-A Family Christmas Program.

The program is looking for adopters and donations. As of Thursday, 420 families have applied for assistance. With an average of 30 families applying daily, we will continue to add families until the application pro-cess ends on Saturday, December 5.

For those who are not familiar with the Adopt-A-Family Christmas program, the sole goal is to serve everyone who needs assistance during the holiday season. The program is designed to match needy families and individuals in the area with families, groups and organizations that are willing to help so everyone can enjoy the Christmas holidays. In 2014, a total of 865 families (2,784 individuals) were adopted through the pro-gram. Over the years, more than 71,220 people have been helped during the Christmas season.

For those who have not adopted before, the estimated cost to adopt one child under age 8 is $25. A child 9 and older normally averages $50. Adopters are asked to provide at least one new toy per child. Any additional items for the children and any gifts for the parents are at the adopter’s discretion. We also have several single adults that need adopted as well. Many of them live in residential care facilities. They are unable to afford their basic necessities and do not have any other form of financial support.

Anyone interested in adopting can stop by the office at 1203 North 6th Street, call 364-1131, fax 816-364-2304 or email adopt@helpmenow.org. The agency is also accepting donations of toys and personal gifts for all ages for their gift room. Monetary donations can be made through the website at www.helpmenow.org, by phone using a credit or debit card, or in person at the agency. All monetary donations are greatly appreciated and will be used to purchase gift certificates to be given to those families who are not chosen by an adopter. The agency is open 8 am to 5 pm Mon-day through Friday and Saturdays in December 9 am to 1 pm.

Laptop Liquidators Donating 40 Desktop ComputersTo AFL-CIO’s Adopt-A-Family Christmas Program

Problem with alcohol? We have a solution. AA info: district2@wamo-aa.org

816-471-7229

Now Open 4 Lunch!

Woods & Bruce Electric“No job too small!”

David Bruce, Master Electrician816-617-1152

Nick’s PaintingOver 40 Years Experience

(816) 232-3258Interior

Tax Services of Northwest Missouri Inc.Cary G. Alburn, EA•Professional Services, Reasonable Fees.•Tax Return Preparation.•Representation before the IRS.•Tax Accounting and Consulting.•Individual, Business/Farm, Trust (816) 901-9575 3110 Karnes Road, Suite 101nwmotax@earthlink.net Saint Joseph, MO 64506

Northwest Missouri Section

My boys notice the toys.Tipped tricycles.Red plastic slides.A stuffed gorilla half buried in silt.I point out the warped doors,windows with their watermarks.I explain to them how rivers bulge,brake the van so they might see the levee our own river breached.They feign interestbut what they really want to knowis where the kids are.

Across the road,a loose Beagle pants in the ditch.A passing truck’s mud tiresstir a curtain of grit.Dust tunnels in through the vents.When I glance back,the Beagle has leftan empty jelly jar.Two hens peckin another lost junkyard.

It’s just another dayalong the North Nodaway.Last year’s oxbow,a bleached stretchof drowned corn.The kids reared herehide near the bluffs,pelt a van like ourswith black walnut hulls.As we listen for the ping,a coal train appears,its steam bleat...one long cry for help.

The Road To Monkey MountainHans P. Bremer

Mindi L. Phillips, Regular Joe Northwest Editor

We are coming to the end of another year, but for me it’s the biggest and best part of it all. It’s for me almost a new beginning. I’m truly a kid at Christmas. I enjoy the food, the gifts, and mostly just hanging out with family. I love watching my kids’ faces as they receive their gifts. They are my gifts, after all, and I soak up the joy along with them.

I do also love to see the lights and the songs of the holiday season. When I was young, the stoplights always meant the holiday season had arrived. After all, growing up in rural Gentry County, we didn’t have “traffic.” Going to “town” to shop for presents meant seeing the green and red lights everywhere. Silly to some, but not for this country girl.

The travel to shop and the travel to see family still involves some long drives, some rural, some otherwise, all in the messiest of weather. Deer and road conditions make it necessary to keep eyes on the highway rather than the scenery at times. While I encourage you all to take the necessary precautions, I also encourage you to appreciate the landscape, some decorated by man and some by the changes of the season.

Change is the name of the game come late December, as we ready ourselves for a brand new year. My 2015 has been full of learning and adapting and changing. As for 2016, I’m hoping for a better and brighter year. I’m not only wishing and hoping, but I’m taking action to make it so. I hope you find ways to do the same.

Happy Holidays, and Have a Wonderful New Year!

Mindi

18 - NW From the Desk of Joe Northwest

Cover photo by Kristi Fainter. Kristi lives in Northern Missouri with her husband Dustin, daughter Isabella, and son Morgan. She took this

photo at their farm property. They suspect the barn is at least 100 years old, partly because it was put together with square nails and wood pegs.

Regular Joe Northwest:We cover NWMO like no one else!

Tarkio, Mound City, Stanberry,King City, Maryville, Bethany,

Maysville, Grant City, Savannah,Albany, & more!

Find our current issue in gas stations, restaurants, libraries, senior centers,

grocery stores, and shops throughout NWMO. We also deliver to Casey’s,

HyVee, Dollar General, and Walmart stores north of Hwy 36 and west of I-35.

Want to see us in your placeof business? Request a delivery!

Our “Regular” Contributors:

Mindi L. Phillips, NW editorDanny R. Phillips, music

Rich Piper, editorialMike Rockett Jr., editorial

Contact Mindi at Regular Joe Northwest816-596-0701

northwest@regularjoepaper.com

PO Box 76Union Star, MO 64494

www.regularjoepaper.comClick “Northwest!”

Deadline for all submissions is the 20th of each month

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NW - 19

December Special!Any Extra Large 1-Topping Pizza

Just $10!

Cannot be combined with any other offers. Valid carryout or delivery.

20 - NW Live Music Across NWMO

New And Ongoing Live Music Events...BETHANYFri 11/6: Country Style Band, 7pm (VFW Hall)Fri 11/20: Country Style Band, 7pm (VFW Hall)

CLARKSDALEFridays: Clarksdale Opry, 7pm (Hawman Center)

FILLMOREFridays: Music and Dance, 7pm (Fillmore Community Hall)

GENTRYFri 11/6: Lions Club Soup & Chili Supper &Music Show, 5pm (Lions)Fri 11/13: Ramblin Country Show w/Tanner Walker & Bill Jordan, 7:30 pm (Lions)Fri 11/27: Ramblin Country Show w/ the Burtons, 7:30 pm (Lions)

GRANT CITYWednesdays: Jam Session, 6pm (Senior Center)

KING CITYSat 11/21: Rock N Country Variety Show, 7pm (TriCo Visitors Center)

MARYVILLESundays: Northwest Opry Country, 2pm (Nodaway Co Senior Center)Sundays: Forney & Paxson, 7pm (Eagles Lodge Bearcat Aerie#3669)Sat 12/5: Dan + Shay, 8pm (NWMSU Ron Houston Center)

OREGONThursdays: Country Music Dance, 7pm (TJ Hall Comm Bldg)

SAVANNAHSaturdays: Savannah Country Jamboree, 6:30pm (Senior Center)

Mike Rockett, Jr.Middle Aged Hustle: Adventures in Motivation

Columnist’s note: I received this a few years ago general delivery and thought, as we’re closing out another year, I would share it with you!

December 31, 1999Mike,Sometimes wisdom is indiscriminate, my friend. I chose this date

to contact you at random in confidence that it will make this missive weightier and more potent.

In a matter of hours I will be but a memory, and by the time you receive this I will have been reduced to an “internet meme.” I have the glorious distinction of dying the same day I was born, nothing more than a parenthesis of existence; a platform to your being. Un-derstanding that this is the way things were meant to be, I accept my fate.

In performing such a vital role I have been honored to witness the gamut of human accomplishment. The list of successes in the mortal endeavor is second in length only to the list of its challenges. One by one the human spirit has triumphed over many of these would be set backs and is miraculously poised to confront future escalating con-tests in the same unwavering manner.

Now shall we speak of progress? It was as if the rantings of a 19th century French novelist were prophetic in nature and divinely so! Glassed buildings ranged the horizon, automotive transportation, high speed trains and a worldwide communications network! Even space travel was imagined! And as meticulously as they were fanta-sized they were also realized, on my watch!

Therefore I know you ask, “Why regale me with dead works long buried in the sands of the past?” Truly, do I spend my re-maining moments of ex-istence to compose a lec-ture? Do I spit my last, sermonizing?

Need I remind you that death finds me at the exact “time” life sent me?

My point, dear boy, is this: achievement isn’t synonymous with prog-ress!

Surely your counte-nance is furrowed quiz-zically, allow me to illus-trate. One of the greatest pieces of fiction, written by Jules Verne himself, was crafted with pains-taking detail and fore-

thought and literally ignored by the publishers of his day. Written decades before my time and shelved for its “cynicism”; it was discovered by a descendant and finally published after my 89th year.

It told the tale of a man who lived in Paris in the distant future where technology had advanced to the point that a man’s needs were gratified within moments. Communication and travel would be ex-pedited at breakneck speed; housing and shelter would extend to the skies as if reaching for the Creator himself. The protagonist would lack for nothing in this fabled age of elevated thought.

Yet, while the human environment had escalated to new heights, the human condition stayed the same. The man in which the story centered on was found wanting in his heart. Sequentially he met a horrible and untimely end.

Just as Jules Verne wrote, mankind has unified imagination and technology in a land of magic and machinery and has solved existen-tial difficulties. Man’s level of knowledge is unprecedented, border-ing on Providence (Divine providence hence the capital P) and yet he is still found wanting.

Your kind has crossed thresholds to discovery and invention only dreamed by the likes of Verne and his literary compatriots yet you are no wiser in the realms of the human heart.

I leave you posing the final question, is there a way to advance the heart? Is the investment of countless amounts of currency to forward earthly conveniences better spent on the mortal soul? It was neither mine to ask or answer and while I can ask to no consequence I can no longer seek to answer for my time is gone. To paraphrase Dickens: Mankind is your business!

I now take my place in history!Yours in eternity,

136 Highway, Albany, MO

Open Mon-Sat 3pm-1:30am21 & over only - We card at the door

NO credit cards - We don’t take plastic!Pool Table & Shuffleboard

A Letter from an Old Friend

22 - NWEvents & Festivals across NWMO

FOREST CITYSat 11/28: 1st Annual Holt Co Music Hall of Fame, 7pm (City Hall)

MARYVILLEMon 11/9: Speaker Dr. Inge Auerbacher, 7pm (NWMSU JohnsonTheater)Thu 11/12: 80s Prom Murder Mystery Event, 7pm (Senior Center)11/12-11/15: “Reckless” by Craig Lucas (NWMSU Studio Theater)Wed 11/18: Kelsey Timmerman, globalization author, 7:30pm (Johnson)11/19-11/22: “Reckless” by Craig Lucas (NWMSU Studio Theater)

ROCK PORT11/7-11/8: Second Annual Quilt Show, 9am (Atchison Co Memorial Bldg)

ONGOING EVENTS

ALBANY: 2nd Wed: Book Club, 10am (Carnegie Library)

BETHANY: Thursday: Dungeons & Dragons, 5pm (Gamers Palace) Fri & Sat: Magic the Gathering, 6pm (Gamers Palace)

GRANT CITY: 2nd Friday: Potluck, Noon (Senior Center)

KING CITY: 3rd Wednesday: Potluck Dinner (Senior Center) Last Monday: Pitch Tournament (Senior Center) Daily: Cards (Senior Center)

Lord’s Warehousedonations needed: coats & food items

E of Albany on Hwy 136660-726-4297

MARYVILLE PUBLIC LIBRARY EVENTS FOR DECEMBERThursday, Dec. 3, 5:30 p.m. Story Hour, for ages birth to 6.Dec. 4-16th Scholastic Book Fair, Buy One Get One Free.Saturday Dec. 5, 3-5 p.m. Star Wars Family Fun EventSaturday, Dec. 5, 6-7 p.m. Star Wars Trivia Night, best for adults and families with older children (8+).Tuesday, Dec. 8, 6-7 p.m. Gingerbread House Creation Event, Grades 1 and up. Must be registered to attend.Monday, Dec. 14 Middle/High School Book Club, Middle School - 4-5 p.m., High School - 5-6 p.m.Tuesday, Dec. 15, 6:15 p.m. Country Christmas Story Hour, for ages 3-8 years.Thursday, Dec. 17, 6-7 p.m. Lego Club, For students in grades 1-4th. Space is limited, must be registered to attend.Monday, Dec. 28, 4-5:30 p.m. “Misc. Mon.,” for students in grades 5-12.

Rich Piper

Christmas is a time that is often full of great pleasure taken in the giving and receiving of gifts. I can recall that when my children were young I would start looking for presents for each of them months before December. Not to catch items on sale but to catch that spark of a thought that, yes, that would be a great gift… The hunting and gathering, if you will allow me the phrase, of finding those special gifts that just matched each of the boys, was one of the more enjoyable experiences of my life.

Enjoyable because I would catch that perfect understanding of how the one receiving would enjoy, appreciate, be thankful for, take pleasure in, utilize, smile at receiving – but most of all, understand, that I loved them, and knew them, and was displaying that in the gifts that I had found for them.

For what was really going on was that I was making use of another means of saying “I love you.”

Not that this was the only way to said I love you, it was just another way of making, and sending, an outward expression of what was in my heart.

I would like to think that I also provided other ways of communicat-ing my love back in those days of their childhood. One of my favorites, that still warms my heart for my being able to do, was to try as best as I could to remind each child before they fell asleep that I loved them. Even now, with the three of us guys all having grown significantly older, I still deeply enjoy the ability to say “I love you,” even though it is difficult due to circumstances to do so with one son, and with the other son it is far too often only possible to say it in words over the phone.

Of course it also warms my heart, even to the point of my eyes leak-ing just a bit as I write this, to hear those words spoken to me by either one of my sons. For I, like all other fathers, need to be loved and appreci-ate knowing that we are.

Thus I try to remember, amongst all the great sales that cry out in print, radio, television, billboards, mail, text messages, word-of-mouth, and the internet, that Christmas is not about the presents – it is about love. About having love and about expressing love.

Now for me, as some of you my dear readers know, that Christmas love is very specific and is represented by the birth of the Christ Child, a gift that I view as the ultimate freely given gift of undeserved love. But there is something about Christmas-time being about love that, while I would personally hope everyone would recognize it the way that I do, it expands to and through folks without respect to their thoughts or theol-ogy, beliefs, or behaviors. To be loved and to express love seems to be an almost universal human need across the cultures of our world.

The ability to show love at Christmas is a wonderful opportunity for each and every one of us. The ability to have that love is an even greater thing; for you cannot give what you do not have.

To quote myself, “You got to have it to give it; and you can’t give it if you don’t have it; but if you have it and give it, they get it, and you still got it.”

Loving words, gifts, gestures, and behaviors are not love; they are but expressions of love. Out-ward, visible, hearable, tactile symbols of love; they are but valuable outward expressions of an inward presence. Love is what is in us, what is in our very being – what we often refer to as being in our heart.

After the basic need for sustenance (food and water), and the basic desire for safety, love follows as the third basic need of we human beings.

We cannot truly become all that we can potentially be without know-ing that we are loved. We need to receive love, whether it is from parent, spouse, children, extended family, friends… Receiving love, knowing that we are loved, is a basic need of human beings. And it turns out it is also a basic building block to constructing our personality, our character, our future.

But without someone else having love to give to us, we can’t receive it. So it is vital that we have love, so we can share it. While I know you do not need the reminder, I confess that at times I do that, love is within and for people – love people, not things. The love of things will never result in the return of love, but the love of people often will. However, in all cases the love held within and expressed outside for others will be rewarded in and of itself.

Christmas is a great time to share love. It’s a wonderful time of the year to share expressions of love with family and to share love with friends. There are also types of love that can be shared with strangers such as expressions of love by giving food or clothing to those in need, working in an area homeless shelter, tutoring children, etc.

And, if you have been reading these writings of mine over the past months, you know this is coming, it is also a great time to express love to those who protect our nation, protect our community, teach our children or grandchildren, preach in our churches, wait on our tables, ring-up and bag up our groceries, see that we have running water and sewer/septic systems, plow our roads, etc. Yes, I wrote “love” and I mean “love” – as love comes and resides in our heart in many fashions, which means that there are many folks to whom we can express love.

Love of course isn’t limited to Christmas. So, here’s a challenge I have made for myself that you might join in on. Instead of Christmas be-ing the peak time of expressing love, let us make it the starting point in which we build up love within us and expand the expressions of love in the months ahead.

Got love – share love – get love.Rich has spent most of his adult life living and/or working in small,

rural communities in Wisconsin, Iowa, and Missouri, including several long stretches in Northwest Missouri. Rich chooses to spend most of his weekday, daytime hours teaching students science, and other things, in Union Star. He also chooses to spend his Sundays, and some other oc-casional time, with the good folks in Cainsville. You can reach Rich at RichPiper@LifePraise.org with comments.

A Christmas Gift Everyone Needs NW - 23

Joe Classifieds24 - NW

Danny R. PhillipsPhoto by Heather Kirchoff

Beacons (definition): a fire or light set up in a high or prominent position as a warning, signal, or celebration.

Beacons, a three piece from the Maryville/St. Joseph area are ready to be a light for those looking for a place to rest in their tired lives, those looking for something meaningful in a sometimes mean-ingless life. Comprised of bassist John Cerrone and twin brothers Bryan and Michael White, Beacons (not “THE Beacons,” the boys were quick to point out) are a band that take musical touchstones and make them their own.

Bands like Jimmy Eat World, The Dear Hunter, Coheed and Cambria, Foo Fighters, and Sunny Day Real Estate are certainly pres-ent in their sound, though the major influence has to be the connection that The Brothers White have always had with one another, a type of psychic link almost. That connection between the twins brings the two together on a different level, through a life spent togeth-er and apart. They always seem on the same page, more often than not clear on the other’s direction or concept for a song, without much discussion.

“We’ve always had a bond, “Michael White said. “We can read each other’s cues; we know what we what to do almost without say-ing it.” Moreover, that bond and energy translate to powerful and expressive drumming by the younger of the twins, Bryan. Drawing from powerhouses like Explosions in the Sky’s Christopher Hrasky, Sunny Day Real Estate’s William Goldsmith, and Coheed and Cam-bria’s Josh Epard, along with the pop sensibility of Ringo Starr, gives White’s drumming a sense of purpose. His work is driven and nu-anced, both delicate and heavy handed, the per-fect blend of razor blades and kid gloves, to play with Cerrone’s smooth low end and Michael’s vocal power. In front of all this is the trio’s abil-ity to harmonize with one another, to lock in to the pocket and push the music one step further.

Drawing from influences that dominated the 1990’s that bordered on emo like Fountains of Wayne, Superdrag, and “Pinkerton” era Weezer, certainly does flavor and feed the music that Bea-cons create. Deep emotion, loss, and frustration are peppered throughout songs like “Machine Man” (inspired by the Charlie Chaplin classic “The Great Dictator”), “Art,” “Williams,” and “Bed Pans and Bible Versions,” all of which are part of the band’s self-titled, 8-song demo, avail-able at their live performances. Loss, tears, reve-lation, and frustration all show their ugly, twisted

heads - madness served raw on a silky, pop pillow. Though Beacons clearly are acquainted with “woe is me, my girl-

friend left me,” classic, clichéd emo, they never step over it, never get suckered into same old, tired, Hot Topic, run-of-the-mill emo. Beacons are offering energy for sadness, “fight in the dog” in place of “please kick me while I’m down,” gnashing a bit of their canines, biting back at a world that seems to strive the hardest at keeping ev-eryone down -or at the very least, in their place in line.

Beacons seems to strive for acceptance of everyone, pushing through a collapsing world, battling in the only way they know, with their music. They are trying like many before them to kick a hole in

the darkness, to carve a place in the world for themselves and anyone who wants to follow along to hear the music but, more importantly, hear what they are saying, the actual content of the words and notes. This is a craft far too lost in the music world today, an industry mostly devoid of purpose and, more often than not, tal-ent.

On a landscape that celebrates the shal-low, derivative, unimpressive, and untalented, where image is prized over sincerity, the “en-tertainer” over “true artist,” the asinine antics

of Kanye West over a beautiful, heartfelt, well-crafted song that sticks with you far longer than “Whip My Nae Nae” or whatever it’s called, it is great and refreshing to see a band like this come along. Maybe they are Beacons, perhaps the name fits; their music is a bright spot, a place to go on an ever-darker ocean.

Check out the music of Beacons at: artistecard.com/beaconsband, bandcamp.com/beacons, soundcloud, and Facebook. Reach them at wearethebandbeacons@gmail.com. Listen to a live acoustic version of the track “Williams” on the band’s YouTube page.

Band You Should Know: Beacons NW Music- 25

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26 - NW North West Classifieds

Carol J. Carpenter

Under a cold sky on Christmas Eve, the last crumpled oak leaves fall on freckles of starlight.

To the east, a chorus of coyotes rises. With yip and howls, the dogs crescendo their cacophonous song.We listen to them sing no more than a few yards behind the house in the dark and bristling trees.

I imagine their excitement, hunting with glowing eyes and restless paws like my jubilant young boys on Christmas morning. The boys stalk silently under the tree, their small hands and shining eyes prowling between mounds of bright packages.

Across the road, the coyotes bring down a yearling deer. Under the pink wisps of sunrise, steam rises from the fawn as the song dogs feast. As the sun winks up, they abandon their kill.

Their hunt over, the boys wander into the den. Sipping hot coffee as sun spills in,I sit on the floor surrounded by theeviscerated carcass of Christmas.

Carol J. Carpenter is a writer/photographer living in the paradise of northwest Missouri. Carpenter enjoys singing, watching the birds, playing with her grandson and making pie. Carpenter’s first chapbook Earth Songs is available at Amazon.com for $8, or obtain autographed copies at the Maryville library for $5.

Christmas Coyotes NW - 27

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28 - NW NWMSU to Host Yuletide Fest and Dan+Shay Concert

Northwest, Madraliers to host annual Yuletide Feaste Dec. 11-12

NWMSU, for the 42nd time, offers a journey back in time to the days of merrie olde England with the songs, dances and entertain-ment magic of the day, during its annual Yule-tide Feaste.

This year’s Feaste will take place at 6:30 p.m. Friday, Dec. 11, and Saturday, Dec. 12, in the J.W. Jones Student Union Ballroom. The elegant royal banquet features a cast of more than 60 students and faculty performing as the Madraliers, Recorder Consort and Royale Brass Quintet.

Tickets are $29.50 and may be purchased by check or cash in Room 101 of the Olive De-Luce Fine Arts Building. Northwest students, faculty and staff may charge tickets to their University account. Credit card orders may be made online.

Attendance is limited to 320 guests each evening, and all tickets are reserved. No tickets will be sold at the door.

“This is the 42nd annual Yuletide Feaste on the Northwest Campus, which is one of the lon-gest-running events of this type in the country,” Dr. Brian Lanier, conductor of the Madraliers and a professor of music. “The Feaste is a won-derful collaboration of so many talented people who come together to produce the event.”

At the Yuletide Feaste, guests celebrate and re-discover Christmas through the evening’s programs and festivities, highly stylized after old England. The menu, performances and decorations are reminiscent of 16th century

Tudor England.The menu includes baked pear with blue

cheese, dried cherries and pecans, carved beef steamship au jus, herb roasted turkey, streusel topped sweet potato casserole, cran-berry pecan rice pilaf, green beans tossed in lemon pepper vinaigrette, braised carrots and parsnips with sage and thyme, rustic rolls with cranberry butter, coffee and iced tea.

“The food is truly outstanding for the evening meal,” Lanier said. “In addition to the musical performances, the Royale The-atrical Players present an annual comic play which is always very entertaining.”

The Madraliers, Northwest’s award-winning chamber choir, is a select choir of

undergraduate and graduate students who study and perform a variety of repertoire ranging from music of the Renaissance to contempo-rary composers. In recent years, the choir has been invited to perform for prestigious choral organizations, including the American Choral Directors Association and the Missouri Music Educators Association.

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SAC fall concert to feature country duo Dan + Shay, Steve Moakler

Country duo Dan + Shay will perform at Northwest Missouri State University on Satur-day, Dec. 5, for the annual fall concert hosted by the University’s Student Activities Council.

The concert is scheduled to begin at 8 p.m. at the Ron Houston Center for the Performing Arts. Doors open at 7 p.m.

Tickets for the concert are free for all Northwest students at the Student Services Center on the first floor of the Administration Building. Each student will receive one ticket after presenting his or her Bearcat Card.

Remaining tickets will be available to the public for $5. The public may purchase tickets at the Student Services Center and online by visiting https://nwmissouri.universitytickets.com and clicking on Student Activities Council.

Dan Smyers and Shay Mooney came to-gether a few years ago to form Dan + Shay and have established themselves as one of country music’s most promising duos. Their debut album, “Where It All Began,” had the biggest

first week by a new duo in the history of trade publication Country Aircheck and it was the most added debut of 2013 on country radio. It was also certified Gold by the Recording Indus-try Association of America.

Other milestones for Dan + Shay’s career include a tour with Blake Shelton on his “Ten Times Crazier” tour and earning a nomination for an Academy of Country Music award in the category of Vocal Duo of the Year.

SAC President and Concert Director Jenny Hutton said Northwest students selected Dan + Shay as a favorite act in an email poll SAC conducted last spring.

“They’re already an established artist and they’re continuing to grow in the industry,” Hutton said. “I feel like an artist of this caliber will do very well at Northwest.”

Opening for Dan + Shay is country artist Steve Moakler. He has released three albums, “Wide Open,” “Time Run” and “All the Faint Lights.” He has been featured in Paste maga-zine and named by Nashville Lifestyles and acclaimed radio DJ Bobby Bones as an artist to watch in 2015.

Moakler’s music has been featured in several national commercials and on networks including MTV, Fox and ABC.

The mission of the Student Activities Council is to plan and administer activities for Northwest students; in order to contribute to a more well-rounded social, recreational and cul-tural life for the campus and community. SAC provides entertaining alternatives to students with late night activities and events throughout the year including concerts, lectures, movies and comedians.

For more information about the SAC fall concert at Northwest, contact Hutton at sacpres@nwmissouri.edu or Northwest’s Office of Student Involvement at 660.562.1226.

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For more information about NWMSU events, visit www.nwmissouri.edu/media/

Regular Joe is looking for your stories of Northwest Missouri past - your childhood memories, old traditions, favorite corner store...Photographs are also welcome. Email us at northwest@regularjoepaper.com

By Shannon Bond

It’s not just the holiday season, if you focus on fitness or you race; it’s the off-season. There is no gravel or single-track to chase and those glorious triathlons are just a memory. The best you can hope for is an occasional 5k in the blistering cold or a snowy ride when the ground is fro-

zen. While getting out in the cold is stimulating for some, for others, the holiday season means a lot of time spent indoors. This indoor time may quickly sap motivation and nudge us away from mindful, healthy living. A useful technique is to use this as more than an unavoidable break from fitness, it is a good time to reflect on how we live, and why. Of course, this reflection usually occurs as turkey, ham, pie, and mashed potatoes are shoveled into eager mouths. That’s OK, it’s also time to forgive ourselves and get the mental gears turning.As we think about last season and the one yet to come, it’s helpful to start by reflecting on why we make race and fitness goals in the first place. If you’re a lifter, you may experiment constantly with your body mass index or power. If you cycle, you may work on speed, power, or increased repetitions per minute (RPM). The same goes for running, except it’s your steps per minute (SPM). While these are without doubt the motivators to achieve gains, such as a faster mile, more power, or more endurance, what is the overall motivation to stay healthy? In order to understand this big picture, it’s helpful to look at the small picture.The small picture is comprised of the mindful moments when our bodies are releasing the right chemicals and we’re reveling in the ah ha, or ahh. We chase goals to stay focused and achieve what a lot of people refer to as the zone, or flow. When we’re running, riding, lifting, swimming, medi-tating, or doing anything else that gets us there, we have a better chance of being mindfully in the moment (even if most of us don’t think of it in those terms). We don’t put in countless hours and 100 miles of riding a week for a single three, six, or even 17-hour race. That wouldn’t make sense. We do it because we love to do it, because we consciously choose to live a certain way and do certain things every day. At times, it helps us to be awake in the moment, which is so much larger than a single race or goal. It is the essence of health and wellness, we do this to be better, which means we are more focused, more motivated, and more engaged in our world. That is the big picture, which is built by a string of moments.We hear a lot of talk about work life balance, but it’s about more than that.

It’s a balance of nutrition, fitness, family, leisure, and work. The faraway goal itself doesn’t even matter that much. In fact, these goals can be coun-terproductive to your health if you let them. We see it in the super com-petitive when the attitude slips into negativity, or we put too much pres-sure on ourselves. A canceled race can really help you understand that the journey is more important than the destination, especially if you trained for months. Is that training time wasted? Of course not, because you were doing what you loved and it made you a better person every day, not just during a race.But, during the off season we are bombarded by rich, mind-numbing food, less training, and endless commercialism. It’s easy to lose sight of the focused, healthy person inside of us. Our goals have faded away with the turkey and the shopping, and so has our focus and feeling of well-being. The anxiety may be more subtle than this, but it’s usually there in some form when we fall off of the fitness lifestyle. Itmay be that nagging subconscious voice wondering if we jiggled a little more on the last set of stairs. The solution is simple though. Just like on-season goals give us motivation to keep the mindful practice of fitness alive within ourselves, let simple goals and forgiveness give us the moti-vation in the off-season.You’re going to eat that piece of pie, and you may even eat until you sleep, and have an all-day video game extravaganza. It’s OK, let it flow this season; but along with that heavy meal, don’t forget your vitamins and keep up with some recent fitness articles to motivate you. Reflect on why you love the fitness life and maybe join your local gym; give inside fitness a chance. Try something new by setting some modest off-season goals like meditating, yoga, or spin class. Heck, buy new running tights so you’re motivated to run a couple of miles in the cold. And most importantly, set an official training start date. Find that season opening race and write down your goals for the entire upcoming season. If you see it, and commit to it, you just may be able to forgive yourself as you navigate the fitness pitfalls of the season.

Navigating the Season’s Fitness Pitfalls

Reviewed by J. Christe

Terry Pratchett has woven a sophisti-cated tale that explores the nature of tradition and culture from an intimate perspective with his book Nation. Unlike his Discworld series, the story unfolds in an alternate history of Earth. Followers of Pratchett know that his prose are full of humor and clever insight into human nature, but this tale shows us a deeper side. The plot includes a Russian influ-enza pandemic which leaves England’s Gentlemen of Last Resort searching for the 137th heir to the throne. It all goes sideways from there. A tsunami destroys Mau’s island nation just as he was about to return victorious from the ritual retreat that would have made him a man. Now, without a soul he has no nation to return to, but quickly discovers that he must work with the shipwrecked Daphne if they want to survive. Of course she is the daughter of the 137th heir to the throne, and sole survivor of the Sweet Judy. The Judy was hurled through the island landscape and landlocked. Prachett takes us on a deep discovery as Mau and Daphne learn what it means to make sacrifices and live within a society, as they are forced to build their own from the survivors who keep washing up on their island. The characters are developed through dialogue, monologue and action. Ample back story is provided through memories and inner conflict. Ac-tion is used to illustrate the morals and values of the characters in a world suddenly void of societal structure. Both protagonists are dynamic with strong character arcs brought on through the need for survival. Readers get a chance to see inside the mind of Mau and Daphne and are brought closer to them as the story progresses.

While there is a touch of magic and other-worldly creatures (it is Terry Pratchett), like tree climbing octopi and death himself, this story is driven by the characters. It explores the complex interdependence between the individual and a society which is full of customs and traditions. It ex-poses the need for science and religion, and what it means to shape one’s own belief. It even presents the traditional role of gender in a dystopian landscape haunted by the remnants of a nation that no longer exists. While the story takes a moment to start, once it gets going, it’s hard to put the book down. The serious issues and themes are deftly lightened by Pratchett’s use of dialogue and misunder-standing. Mau and Daphne, and the later newcomers, are forced to overcome cultural and lan-guage barriers that present enter-taining situations to the read-ers. In the end, there is a great discovery on the island. This discovery shows our characters just how easily a new perspec-tive can turn their worldviews upside down. This book is very much recommended as a serious, yet entertaining, read over the holiday season.

Nation by Terry Pratchett Wonders What Those Traditions Are For?

Book Review - pg 31