The Book of Love, Love and Loss

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    I

    The book of

    ,Love&LossBy SifuMwas

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    II

    Dedication

    These ten verses are dedicated to ten years of personal discovery,

    altruistic love that gives second chances in life and to true love and to

    true loss.

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    III

    Preface

    Love and Loss are much talked about. It is yet unclear how well they are

    understood. They stir in us a desire, they summon our memories, they

    stoke a host of possibilities we have stored up for ourselves. Love and

    loss are not empirical. Any understanding of either is the aggregate of

    the sum of our experiences at a personal level, I opine.

    Strangers become friends. Friends become lovers. Lovers are lost. The

    scars of loss become as medals after a war, pinned to the lapels of our

    hearts. Laurels for veterans in conquests of love. Reminders for

    survivors that the ultimate battle is loss. Love we had, love we lost and

    mementos of loss.

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    IV

    sparkling eyeballs gems

    sparkling gems, i see no eyeballs

    mystic toxic, precious and that all

    at the fore of a foe, all i see is beauty

    cutting a gaze from across, please don't hurt me

    sat up far and across, the valley between is very steep

    the pure waters flow beneath, our true emotions run deep

    Lightning alone never cracked the sky, like her smile from across mine

    and never did the sun shine, like they did her thoughts in my mind

    i taste to wonder, what she will say

    what he will say, will it be said?

    is it for fear, is it what we live for?

    it is out of a desire for this tune that we play on?

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    V

    the sun and borderline cross

    the sun is out for once i care today

    it's grey outside but i don't see it that way

    it's shining inside and if you don't mind me say

    today i'm another color, im bursting with rays.

    do you care to see inside of me

    do you care to take a peek inside for free

    do you dare to cross the borderline, the wall you've built to fence inside

    with your entire army, with all your hearts might

    i feel this joy inside me today, today i know is the day

    my conscience becomes an art-form, and loosely today it will stray

    shifting feelings by and in sight of it, each this way and in every way

    today i cast an enchantment upon you, bless you the whole day today

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    VI

    change besieged my heart

    That change is change has not changed change,

    That love is haste and in haste breaks breaks,

    We always hope it right in night and daylight,

    We be wrong on our own and in long throngs.

    Moment impossible that sensational spasm,

    More is meant even standing at sure chasm,

    I will reach out and faith-walk a sacrifice,

    I will offer myself up a mollified sacrifice.

    I know sleep will be lost nothing to rectify,

    Unknown the end maybe perhaps to lenify,

    To want to have to have that I want,

    To walk my trap to ensnare center core.

    I will be brave I will stand firm,

    I will betray inform in mine bosom,

    This what I seek in body and heart,

    Loss I feel besieged my heart.

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    VII

    nyet

    I would if I could say good good good,

    I won't say good just to hear good, good.

    I will say nyet then yet and nyet yet,

    I will smile smite when you're out of line.

    I won't call you a bitch an insult to a cat,

    I won't hurt the feelings feline feelings at that.

    I will note that and tap tap tap,

    I will log that stupe indelible mark.

    I - I - I this seems I - I some more,

    I for sure don't give a damn not now anymore.

    I give you free not free to hurt me some more,

    I tell you this I won't have this no more.

    I read you this reproof once last more,

    I treasure you still this I tell yet solemn raw.

    I honor you memory medals on lapels adorn,

    I conceded battle I will trash you in war

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    VIII

    maybe one day you will see, what you really are to me

    maybe one day you will know, all you need to know and more

    maybe one day you will find, the reason why love is said to be blind

    maybe one day you wont mind, me telling you that you're always on my mind

    i don't know why you opened for me, when i came knocking at your door

    i'm not sure why you showed pity on me, as you insisted me and you are nothing more

    i don't know whether i should speak from within me, my love and admiration for you will always be in store

    i'm not sure you can really hear me, knocking at your heart's door

    maybe i expect too much having broken your heart, but i'd rather that than tear your life apart

    maybe i explain with too many buts, but you don't need to be told without me how good you've got

    maybe you still insist you don't understand, but fate is fate and you look good having walked through its gate

    maybe it's too late and i need to pen down, but it's never too early to spark a thought of what if like now

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    IX

    loves mistress

    we don't believe we didn't see this,

    why did we sleep and not dream this?

    we smile and revel indulge in this

    did we smile or just curl our lips?

    we will define life like this,

    should we defy and surge above this?

    do always remind it does exist,

    will you refine your life's thesis?

    questions that i hobo ask like this,

    gypsy read my mind can you see through this?

    i wonder aloud in to say and in white put this,

    put this way, who's love's mistress?

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    X

    The sun has set, the son levitates

    The bed is spread, the soul meditates

    Test is set, reality to evaluate

    Thoughts abate to the moon, now gravitate

    Fellowship of turtledoves, two not more

    Alo-groom the plumes we have smoothed, adore

    The sun shines abright and refined above, hopes astore

    In my arms I have who I only want to have, to adore

    I leap into the mystique, and through it I go

    The speech contempt, and contour tours

    My best I shed in time due, and I endure

    Morpheus in your steps wake me up, be sure

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    XI

    dear love you'd never know,

    what glow i feel in my heart, when i hold you in my arms

    dear heart you would never know,

    how special she is, to be part me and it never know

    dear love i want you to know,

    that today and forever, you are my dream and in my prayers

    dear heart i want you to know,

    that she is my sweet, and for her there should never be, a no.

    dear love you'd never know,

    how deep in my heart your, smile at me conjures a glow.

    dear heart you'd never know,

    what a perfect reflection of me you are, till tomorrow comes

    dear love i want you to know,

    your needs and dreams, are in my prayers and you too

    dear heart i want you to know,

    that he is my sweet, and for him there should never be, a no.

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    XII

    from the seen comes the unseen

    that special tenderness that no arm can feel

    that specialness that only the heart knows

    which goes beyond the poets creativity zone

    that blows back and forth like a storm

    shaking both sides and sweeping all else

    having survivors lament

    having the winds move on

    move on to another better place where they rejoin.

    from the seen comes the unseen

    the memory of those we'll always love ...

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    XIII

    why do we sit, what do we think

    light and in silk, black as night still

    why do we stare, stare and not think

    stare and be still, stare till we sleep

    if a fella like me, and a beauty like she ...

    why do we chew, the nails that do grow

    our porcelain fingers, light and in silk

    why do we stare, stare and thinkwhat is being scribbled, wonder and think

    if a beauty like me, and a fella like he...

    why do we pretend, pretend we don't peep

    writing on that thing, stealing glances at me

    why do we glance, and write on that thing

    a beauty like she a fella like me

    light and in silk, dark as night still.