Scott Abel Coach Whisperer

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Table of Contents Preface ................................................................................................................................................ 5

Chapter 1: Introduction....................................................................................................................... 8 Personal Unrelated Relevant Background ............................................................................................. 10 The Big Picture....................................................................................................................................... 11 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 12

Chapter 2: The Certification Dilemma and the Gap of Relevance ....................................................... 14 Truckloads and Teaspoons..................................................................................................................... 17 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 20

Chapter 3: Some Basics on the Nitty Gritty of the Coach/Client Relationship..................................... 21 Elements of the Coach/Client Relationship ........................................................................................... 22 Coaching Client Awareness.................................................................................................................... 24 The Triangle of Awareness: The Physical, The Emotional, and the Mental ........................................... 25 Riding a Bike .......................................................................................................................................... 28 Guidance Counsellor.............................................................................................................................. 32 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 33

Chapter 4: Characteristics of Good Coaches: The Coaching Pie: Slice by Slice..................................... 34 Positive .................................................................................................................................................. 35 Enthusiasm ............................................................................................................................................ 36 Supportive ............................................................................................................................................. 36 Trusting.................................................................................................................................................. 37 Modeling................................................................................................................................................ 38 Focused.................................................................................................................................................. 39 Communication Skills: Goal Oriented .................................................................................................... 40 Knowledgeable ...................................................................................................................................... 41 Observation Skills................................................................................................................................... 43 Respectful .............................................................................................................................................. 44 Patience ................................................................................................................................................. 45 Be Clear.................................................................................................................................................. 46 Assertiveness ......................................................................................................................................... 47 Too Many Cooks .................................................................................................................................... 48 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 48

Chapter 5: The Coach and Client Entity.............................................................................................. 51 Praise and Criticism ............................................................................................................................... 58 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 60

Chapter 6: Coach as Teacher ............................................................................................................. 62 The Homework Analogy......................................................................................................................... 64 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 69



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Chapter 7: ‘How to’: Communicating Effectively As a Coach and On‐line Coach ................................ 71 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 78

Chapter 8: Strategies and Tactics for Communicating Coaching Instruction ....................................... 80 1) Factual ............................................................................................................................................... 80 2) Explanatory........................................................................................................................................ 81 3) Justifying............................................................................................................................................ 82 4) Leading .............................................................................................................................................. 83 5) Hypothetical ...................................................................................................................................... 83 6) Alternative Choices............................................................................................................................ 84 7) Summarizing: ..................................................................................................................................... 86 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 89

Chapter 9: Developing Coaching Communication Skills and Awareness ............................................. 91 Understanding the Exchange Value of Coaching Communication ........................................................ 94 Communication Boundaries .................................................................................................................. 98 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................... 99

Chapter 10: Advancing Coaching Awareness ................................................................................... 101 The Science of the non‐Science: Developing Coaching Intuition......................................................... 104 Attention/Intention ............................................................................................................................. 104 Undivided Client Attention Leads to Enhanced Observation Skills...................................................... 106 Empowerment in Process .................................................................................................................... 108 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................. 112

Chapter 11: Common Coaching Mistakes ........................................................................................ 114 1) The Coaching Biases ........................................................................................................................ 114 2) The Carrot and Stick Tactic .............................................................................................................. 115 3) Over‐Coaching ................................................................................................................................. 116 4) Vogueing.......................................................................................................................................... 118 5) Jargonizing ....................................................................................................................................... 120 6) Paralysis by Analysis ........................................................................................................................ 121 7) Emotional Reactions ........................................................................................................................ 122 8) Walk the Talk ................................................................................................................................... 123 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................. 124

Chapter 12: Where to Start?............................................................................................................ 126 Understanding Motivation .................................................................................................................. 129 Reasonable Expectations in Corrective Situations............................................................................... 131 Client Accountability and Responsibility.............................................................................................. 137 Character Types and Personality Traits ............................................................................................... 140 Notes for Mentoring Students:............................................................................................................ 143

Chapter 13: Client Interaction ......................................................................................................... 147 Client Feedback ................................................................................................................................... 150



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Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................. 153

Chapter 14: Summary of Concepts and Conclusion .......................................................................... 154 The Job of Coach or On‐Line Coach in the Fitness Industry................................................................. 156 Coaching Bias....................................................................................................................................... 158 Conclusion ........................................................................................................................................... 162 Grooming and Mentoring .................................................................................................................... 163 Notes for Mentoring Students............................................................................................................. 164



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Preface

Let me begin with some basic house‐cleaning notes. Like all my books, this book is self‐published and self‐edited. This means it may have some grammatical inconsistencies and flaws. There is no publishing company behind this effort to oversee and polish the final product beyond my own tweaking. I’m just putting that out there in all honesty: Having said that, this book is content‐driven. And to my mind, the content of this book has yet to be addressed in any meaningful way within the Fitness Industry. And for me, this represents a sad reality. I think if the true experts in this industry take up the cause of reading this book, then over time, additional works could go a long way to eliminating the internet hucksters and marketers masquerading as “experts” within the field. So this book could really be a “call to arms” of sorts. It represents a beginning. My hope is that other industry experts and coaches and consumers will use this book as a reference. And with both critique and acknowledgement, move forward from the basic premise and ideas contained herein.

Over the years I’ve been consistently bombarded with the question “What certification is the best?” The answer is frankly, all of them, and none of them. The question is in fact the wrong question. Therefore the answer tends to be misleading. Chapter 2 of this project addresses what I refer to as “The Certification Dilemma and the Gap of Relevance”. Like many other industries, the Fitness Industry has become one dimensional in its focus. This is known now as the information myth. And this myth is predominant in domain media and its field of study. It is a fundamental problem of relevance. And certainly accreditation can be important. But industry accreditation is limited in focus and scope. It addresses, and not very well at that, “what to know” to be a professional in the Fitness Industry. However, it ignores the fundamental reality of the job. The real question people are asking is ‘how to be a professional in the Fitness Industry?’ They are asking how they sustain occupational viability and career advancement in the Industry. And these questions are simply not answered or even addressed within certification accreditation. In fact, the focus on what ‘certification’ to acquire takes the inquiry in the exact opposite direction in terms of what skills and talents are necessary to do the job. And I would add to this, the skills and talents to do the job adequately and efficiently. As a matter of fact, the question of certification does not answer the fundamental question for the fitness industry. This is addressed in my first chapter. And this question should be, “what is the nature of the job of fitness professional?” The answer will surprise you!

By example, learning about the about the body is entirely distinct from learning about the client: And distinct, yet again, from learning about the client’s body. This is what I mean when I say the information myth leads people in the wrong direction in pursuit of knowledge.



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Every book should solve one fundamental question or problem. This book attempts to do so. The fundamental problem seeking solution; and what people are really asking is “how does a person establish and sustain career viability in the Fitness Industry?” The answers will surprise you. And the skill set involved, will take you in an entirely different direction than you would expect. This project goes out of its way to make fundamental distinctions of concepts so widely used in the industry; often incorrectly.

This book addresses coaching and on‐line coaching in the Fitness Industry, what it is, and what it is not. To that end, Chapter 5 addresses the distinct differences between the “Coach” and the “Trainer”. These terms are often used interchangeably in the Fitness Industry, yet as other industries illustrate, the differences are qualitatively distinct and obvious: Funny how this industry of all misses this difference on a regular basis.

The Fitness Industry suffers its own paradigm blindness in these matters. As such it fails to provide the real information for study on how to succeed long‐term within the Industry. Coaching you see, is a two‐sided coin. On the one side is what is known as domain knowledge. This consists of the “what” to study, as well as information and experience. This is the sole focus on the industry and its accreditation as it currently exists. And this leads to some blind spots in terms of the various realities of actually “doing the job” of Fitness expert. The industry focus leads to a blind‐spot of awareness only on the immediate aspects of application. But like any endeavour, fitness goals are a process of acquisition and a focus on only the immediate elements of application is near‐sighted, to put it kindly. Moreover, this one‐dimensional focus on knowing information tends to neglect and objectify the actual client the fitness professional is supposed to be certified and qualified to help. How does that ever work? Current industry standards have a very kindergarten equation of “know this, and then slot client in here”. This project will show in detail just how limited in scope such thinking tends to be. It also will illustrate how and why so many people fail to make it as professionals in the industry. In short, they have not been directed to studying the “actual” job of fitness professional.

This is the other side of that coin mentioned above. And this is the subject of this project. After reading this book, and after doing the exercises at the end of each chapter, you will be exposed to a fundamentally different way of looking at the job of Fitness professional. This project is meant to empower both the wannabe Fitness professional as well as the Fitness consumer as well. Expertise can be more clearly defined by examining in detail both sides of its coin.

I have also made sure to emphasize key points, acronyms, and phrases by putting them in bold font or underlining them. To create your own work‐book for the job, merely copy and paste whatever you see in bold or underlined and you will have a Reader’s Digest version of this book for quick reference. The era of the Fitness Coach and the On‐Line Fitness Coach has been upon



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us for some time. It’s time someone addressed in real terms, what it is, what it isn’t, what it should be, and how to do it!

Read and find out that knowing about Fitness is much different than being and doing the job of fitness professional.



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Chapter 1 Introduction

This venture is more important and substantive now in our industry than at any previous time I have lived through or discussed with my compatriots; present and past. The reality of the internet, internet marketers and infomercial success that invades this industry is a testament to a huge gap that exists in the fitness industry and always has. It is in fact a sad testament to this industry that these outside forces are actually more successful in recruiting and marketing people to their ‘fitness’ products than the actual expert base that continues lame certification processes that are incomplete and misleading at best. I will be exploring this in greater depth.

Throughout this dissertation, there will be an emphasis on the differences between trainer and coach. There will be an emphasis as well on key words that mark what this industry is truly about. I will highlight these words throughout the text. There are elements of the fitness industry even at the highest levels that represent failure and not success. The industry either consciously avoids these realities or underestimates their own failure in perpetuating them. Regardless of the why, career success in the Fitness Industry has a lot more to do with traits of character that lie outside the knowledge umbrella of Fitness and what people understand expertise to actually be. I will be addressing these realities within the following pages. Hopefully at the end of this project, many of you will be able to clearly see where emphasis needs to be placed for ongoing success in the industry of Fitness. And it will not be where you think. This project requires, you the reader, to be more open‐minded than ever before regarding what you think your skills are to being able to succeed in this business. And to be clear, knowledge is NOT a skill. And a theme I will repeat throughout the remainder of this project is that knowledge itself is of limited value to long term success in the fitness industry. And this is one reality the experts seem blind to. And to be fair, this neglect is part of their own industry paradigm blindness. It’s a blindness that seeks to reinvent itself, year in and year out. And while perpetuating the information myth allows experts like me to further our reputations, others who seek to establish themselves in the industry are left by the way side and do not make it. They rigorously apply themselves in everything the industry dictates to them is important, and yet an overwhelming majority do not last or do not progress in their careers in this industry. With so much expertise so widely available in this industry now, how can this be? The answers may surprise you.

This is my version of what it truly takes to succeed at the highest levels in the Fitness Industry. And it’s not only about financial success that I refer, but to career longevity more importantly. And the fact is that what I see as clear truth puts me at odds against most of my colleagues. Yet once I explain this thesis in detail, it may have you reconsidering your career in the Fitness



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Industry based on the actual skill sets required of you. Or at the very least, this project will lead you to “light bulb” moments of how and where you can better yourself for career durability in the Fitness Industry.

I started this project by asking myself two questions that I have been pondering for a few years now. These questions are “How did I get here?” and “Why am I still here?” The answer to these questions is overwhelmingly one‐sided. The answer to these questions is “Coaching”. I got to where I am in the Fitness Industry not so much via my knowledge base, but through an acquired and applied coaching skill set. Moreover, I have been able to stay viable in this industry for the exact same reason. Yet, when I peruse the index of lecture material at all these various conventions and symposiums, the topic of “coach” in the fitness industry seems woefully missing. These professional symposiums and CEU courses are getting more and more carried away with a never ending litany of useless information and pseudo science at the expense of teaching and creating insightful and original leaders who truly help the consumer‐base to reach and sustain their goals.

Looking back over the last few decades, what is considered “knowledge” in the industry has changed in both the diet and training realms. And yet each era assume with arrogance that their new way is the “right” way. After watching “right ways” come and go over decades, what I know now is that even when knowledge changes considerably, coaching and leadership skills do not. And yet, any address of the industry into “coaching” or “on‐line coaching” seems to remain in a vacuum. As of January 2010, I am entering my fourth decade of earning a living in the fitness industry. I can say whole heartedly that the skill set to career viability lies outside the “knowledge realm” of Fitness and is more deeply connected to people skills. It is not what you know that makes you viable for a career in fitness. This is just marketing of knowledge. Career success in the Fitness Industry is marked instead by what you do and how you do it.

My goal in this project is to share with all wannabe coaches and trainers the elements of coaching and leadership application which truly merit success and sustainability in the Fitness Industry. The application of coaching skills presented here bridges a huge gap which exists in the Fitness Industry. This bridge goes beyond the illusion of knowledge base, the information myth, and scientism and instead addresses a fundamental skill set that cannot adequately be “studied” in order to be acquired. Coaching and leadership are a talent; an ability if you will. Knowledge is usually contained in a box. Talent and ability seldom can have such lids to containment. The truth is, coaching skill is all about understanding nuance. And because nuance is so complicated it tends to be ignored as a focus of study in an industry which clearly needs it.

It has often been said, and I agree that “success leaves clues”. So even though the skill set of coaching has a talent component to it, which cannot be studied to be acquired; there are



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specific elements to the coaching skill set which can be addressed and shared. If these component parts are studied enough to be understood, then they may leave ‘footprints’ for others to follow for bridging the gap between knowledge and application. The truth is, even a tablespoon of knowledge is enough to truly succeed in the Fitness Industry; as long as it is matched with an equal tablespoon of application skills. Addressing this reality is the focus of this project.

Personal Unrelated Relevant Background

To begin with my own journey of how did I get here, and why am I still here; let me share with you the following relevant facts that have everything to do with my success in the industry; but very little to do with my knowledge‐base within the industry: The experiences that led me to being a great coach were the variety of exposures I had to different people from different realms through my past. My active and on‐going fascination back then with how and why different people perceived the world, allowed me to develop a very specific skill set. Little did I realize at the time it was this very unique skill set that lent itself to me becoming a very successful coach in the Fitness Industry.

First, I am from a very blue collar background. I put myself through school working in a factory by day, and as a doorman in a nightclub by night. Yet, at the same I was mingling in these blue collar worlds I was also studying Marx, Freud, Shakespeare, Hume, etc. The divergence of these two worlds was not lost on me. You could say I was “paying attention” to the observations of the world around me, both intellectually and culturally. I learned the necessity of becoming adept at intellectually conversing on the subject matter of these writers, philosophers, and scientists with other students and faculty members. Moreover, I had to “defend” and undergraduate thesis grounded in theory and theoretical application of theory. I mention this because it is the opposite of the current vogue trend in the Fitness Industry where people graduate as empiricists, not theorists. So what would seem like a disadvantage in my curriculum of study actually became my strength for being a great coach. Why? Because the coaching skill set is about people, not about a limited domain of knowledge. I will come back to this as well throughout the various chapters below. The important point is not to indulge you with my past, but to point out a very relevant difference of this past which forged my abilities and talents for being a coach in the Fitness Industry.

At the same time my studies took me in one mental direction, my working reality had little to do with intellectual jargon or vocabulary. One of my first career jobs after my undergraduate degree was working with young offenders. Next I assumed a job within “Community Corrections”. The premise of this job was to help long term offenders who were getting



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released from prison reintegrate into the real world. My mandate was to find them jobs and engage them in life skills training for reintegration into society in a healthy functional manner. This job required of me once again to move back and forth between very divergent realities. I had to speak to the ex‐cons from their vantage point; not only to be understood but respected as well. At the same time, I had to establish ties both within the community and within the bureaucracy of officials I worked for. The community and the bosses had to be confident in my social work skill set and my communication skills. I was once again moving back and forth in different worlds whose members perceived the world in different terms and mental images. This experience established my capacity for communicating in varying degrees and vocabularies that serve me well as a coach. The key word here which keeps popping up is “communication”. And the relevant point is the context of communication. You communicate “with” people, not “at” them; or “on” them. This is the operating difference between a study of a domain of knowledge, and the required skill set of application. This people‐oriented skill set is not something that can be gained by graduating as an ‘empiricist’ no matter how deep that knowledge base may go.

The Big Picture

Have you ever done a large puzzle? Individuals who graduate with “science” degrees relevant to the Fitness Industry see the focus of study much differently than theorists like me. Current experts would have you believe that an emphasis on the “smaller pieces” is what effectively puts the puzzle together to form the big picture. My experience has been the opposite. As a theorist, I see a totally distinct and relevant skill set than what these empiricists would even acknowledge. I label this lack of insight they share as “paradigm blindness”. To my mind the more complete methodology is to address the big picture of the puzzle first; what the puzzle will resemble upon completion, and work from there. Then you work the puzzle from that conceptual beginning; only then looking into the smaller pieces, starting from the border etc and working in. What is easier, taking a look at the picture on the box to see how the puzzle will look upon completion; and having a visual idea of it while working the pieces; or paying no attention to the picture on the box, and working on ‘puzzle rules’ for putting the pieces together? One approach sees the whole, the other only pieces. If the ‘puzzle’ in question is a client, then the big picture should be the mandate of application; yet the Fitness Industry still take the piece by piece approach.

As I’ve said often in my seminars discussing paradigm blindness, “I’ve never met an effective coach in my industry who wears a lab coat.” In fact I’ve forgotten more science of my industry than most experts will ever access. Why? Because I’ve learned that more and more scientific knowledge has little to do with being an effective coach. Client success is not about all you



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know, but about all you do. Client compliance is the goal if you have even that tablespoon of knowledge referred to above. And when a good coach considers client compliance, he considers the immediate, the lingering, and the long term aspects of this compliance. This is another lesson I took away from my social work experience. Short term success is simple. Anyone can starve a willing participant and test their will power for 12 weeks, and have a “successful physique transformation”. In fact this seems to be the emphasis in the Fitness Industry. But if the weight loss or transformation is not sustained, then this represents failure to my mind for the coach. Why is this not being addressed in the Fitness Industry? Just like in social work, if my client ends up going back to jail regardless of short term compliance to rules, then the result is not a success, but a failure. It’s time the industry addressed these false successes for what they are: Failure.

A coach has instead a different mandate than short term success with its false indicators. Changing a client for long term benefit is all about process, motivation, consistency. In this sense, domain knowledge takes a back seat to people skills. You can teach someone to ‘activate their glutes’; you can teach someone to ‘squat correctly’; you can teach someone to count calories and choose foods more intelligently to suit their goals. These are all things that can be studied in a book. But to engage someone to maintain a passion for doing all these things, and a motivation to sustain them without entertaining obsession, guilt, or outcome; this requires on‐going people and communication skills. The communication skills I unwittingly developed by participating in different worlds combined with my early passion for bodybuilding led me to becoming a natural leader and coach. The knowledge and information edge I acquired in the industry was just a natural component part of the process. You could say my knowledge base in the Fitness Industry was the smaller pieces of the larger puzzle. Current expertise based in empiricism would have you believe the opposite.

Coaching is about going from the ‘what’ and ‘how’, to the more important WHY? The focus on short terms results in the Fitness Industry only creates a turnstile type of business for the coach or trainer. But imbuing a client with long term purpose and desire to succeed and sustain their progress serves both you as the coach and the client for the short term and the long term. Long term success in the Fitness Industry is more insured by being a good coach, more so than a competent trainer.

Notes for Mentoring Students

• Is there a skill set for long term success in the fitness industry that the industry itself may be ignorant of, or negligent in exploring in depth?



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• How much domain knowledge is really needed to gain and sustain long term success in the Fitness Industry?

• Explore the questions, “How did I get here?” “Why am I still here?” In other words, what specific aspects of your own character and environment drive you and sustain you. How can you use them in your fitness career goals?

• Examine what Scott refers to as nuance, and what it pertains to.

• Primarily, what is the coaching skill set about? Address this question consistently through the remaining chapters.

• What is the benefit to the “big picture” analogy?



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Chapter 2 The Certification Dilemma and the Gap of Relevance

One of the working falsehoods of the Fitness Industry is an undertone of what drives it. And this is content over context. This is a fundamental mistake. The truth is this is a “client‐centred” industry. Certification in its many current forms would have you believe that Fitness is an information‐based industry. It’s time experts addressed this falsehood in its truest sense and what it means in actuality; not practicality. To be clear, the Fitness Industry is a “relationship‐oriented‐service industry”. This truth is lost in today’s dogma of microanalysis and dogmatic pursuit of chasing scientific representation. The actual people you are training to learn to guide are lost in the pursuit of more and more information and research.

Let’s begin with a basic premise that will be examined in greater detail in subsequent chapters. Indeed this comparison will be a constant throughout this text. “Trainer” and “Coach” are vastly different terms. This distinction seems to be blurred in the fitness industry and the two terms are often used interchangeably. Yet let’s look at the professional sports world for some distinction. If we observe the NFL, the NBA, the NHL etc one obvious observation can be made without error. In these professional brackets, “trainer” and “coach” are far and away separate entities. They are separate titles, separate importance, separate emphasis, separate impact, and separate context. In professional athletics “coach” is EVERYTHING. “Trainer” is correctly subordinate to the coach. How and why does the fitness industry confuse these two terms and use them interchangeably when everywhere else they mean completely different things?

The lessons to be gained here are obvious. In the Fitness Industry let’s be clear and putting all political correctness aside; the fact is any moron can be a trainer. Any moron can get certified as a trainer. Certification at various levels exists to basically insure this unfortunate reality. Any certification that can be achieved with as little involvement and requirement as is current in the Fitness Industry is not worth the paper it’s written on. And in reality these certifications often even at the advanced level do not mean much. As I always say “certified, does not mean qualified!” Moreover, training is something you do “to” the client, while coaching is something you do “with” the client. With certification being earned merely from studying specific information and then being tested on it, what is practical often strains what is actual. On‐line certifications and CEU’s can be done at home from your computer. If coaching a client is indeed a “relationship‐centred‐service” orientation, then how can this skill set possibly be evaluated in an objective home study process? I know several “qualified” trainers who have taken the home exams and CEU’s for someone else, to save them time. The current certification dilemma leaves far too many wannabe coaches and trainers in the Fitness Industry lacking in the most basic elements of a coaching skill‐set. Regarding trainers, JC Santana said some time ago, “any



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monkey can slap a bunch of exercises together and call it a program.” And regardless of certification, this is the reality which represents the fitness industry right now.

All too often and more and more frequently people are getting (but not earning) the reputation of “coach” which is vastly overstated. And the reality of this is that such overstatements are possible because of a lack of understanding of the terms “trainer” and “coach” within the Industry itself. As I’ve said and will say again, testing someone’s will power in the short term with deprivation diets and hours of training; and often the addition of performance enhancing drugs, to “win” a contest or transform a physique, has little to do with actual coaching or even trainer knowledge. The fact this “actuality” can be confused in the Fitness Industry is proof again of a true lack of understanding of these key terms and their representations.

Success leaves clues. Most clients in the Fitness Industry are seeking cosmetic physique enhancement. If we go back to the professional sports world and observe high level athletes, and especially those with impressive physique development; there are clues which suggest something is missing in the Fitness world of study and certification. We find across various sports and activities across the globe NOT a similarity in exercise orientation or practice. And we also find there is NOT a similarity in a field of study. (i.e. certification programs or strength and conditioning journals) Yet the Fitness Industry has a narrow focus on studying ‘material’ regardless of relevance. The truth of the common thread of high level athletes across the globe is not a field of study or a mode of training. What truly links these athletes is a long history of “doing” their selected activity with a concomitant long history of being well‐coached within it. Observationally, coaching seems to be the common thread. Coaching is the language of success. Across the globe athletes with great physiques seldom spend time on focusing ‘studying’ how to achieve them.

To be sure, what is observed is not which certification is most valued; it’s not what area of study yields the most benefits; and it’s definitely not who had the most cherished secret exercises and diets. Yet all these “nots” are the current pursuits to expertise in the fitness industry. Something is amiss. And coaching relevance is what is missing in the fitness industry. Coaching and understanding high performance leaves clues. Action and coaching ARE the secrets. Yet, coaching is seldom addressed in the realm of professional accreditation and certification for people in the Fitness Industry. High performance is not about equal results, but about attaining a person’s highest level of performance and desire to do so. In the fitness arena it’s about being content with the results of doing so. Coaching and its requisite skill set should be implicit within this context.



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Because the study of coaching represents more than one dimension and confounding elements of people and communication skills, it seems to be simply ignored in the arena of certification in the Fitness Industry. And a study of comprehensive course work for the skill set for coaching may more adequately suit a degree program in University. I would not argue this point, and I agree with it. Perhaps mentoring is better suited for the role of becoming coach in the Fitness Industry. And once again we see this reality reflected in professional sports as well. Nearly all respected coaches at one time were mentored as subordinates under other career coaches. Mentoring may be the well‐spring for true success for longevity in the Fitness Industry.

But merely ignoring the coaching component just leaves a void in the area of accreditation and certification in the Fitness Industry which is misleading. I have several clients who themselves have several certifications. They attend the various symposiums and conventions offered by the industry. A few of them also take every CEU they must in order to “maintain” their standing in the field and their certification updates and upgrades. But the inside information here is important to reveal. Every single one of my clients under this certification umbrella which represents knowledge has reported to me they’ve never used a single bit of information they’ve acquired as a result of upgrades by paying for new CEU’s. Once again the actual and the practical are different worlds. And information held out as knowledge, when ignored, is anything but knowledge. So the business of fitness and certification is representing one thing, but in actuality is another. So this begs the question, “what are we really teaching?” “Is it relevant, or merely new, and created to generate income?” And worse yet, if the smartest people are ignoring what they’ve supposedly gained in these course upgrades, then what is the real benefit to the potential client?

The ugly truth is that the Fitness Industry relies on the high turnover rates of clients and trainers within it, in order to sustain itself. In other words, 80% of certified trainers leave the industry within 5 years. The average trainer lasts merely 18 months in the vocation. And within this same time frame there is a lot of horizontal mobility of trainers jumping from one facility to another. This shows a lack of stability as well as little opportunity for advancement. There seems to be very little job or career security from being certified by various fitness institutions or organizations. The fitness industry correctly wants to insure competence of trainers. But the trainers are misled to believing their certification somehow represents requisite skills for lasting in the industry and moving up within it. These are falsehoods. And this also has a tremendous impact on clients in the industry. There exists almost a total 100% recidivism rate for clients in the Fitness Industry who have achieved their goals. Whether its fat loss or physique transformation the truth is even if most people actually achieve their goals, they do not sustain them even in the short term. Even consumer clients themselves are likely to move on from the Fitness Industry within a five year period. To my mind, this high turnover rate of trainers and clients does not represent success of higher learning, accreditation and certification in the



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industry. It actually represents its failure. This represents the same mistake played out in public education facilities. This ugly truth is akin to learning calculus in grades four and five only to grow up to be a life skills counsellor in a group setting somewhere. Truly there exists a ‘gap of relevance’ within the certification process.

And because of this, unscrupulous marketers can swoop in and trump knowledge with ‘get results quick’ schemes and formulations which rake in millions. In other industries where the proof is in the pudding, this would not be possible. So because this industry relies so much on short term emphasis and turnover, it is actually failing, not succeeding in providing career opportunities for its students.

By analogy, imagine going to barber college or hairdressing school and getting certified. You open up a shop. And with all the latest gadgets and techniques you’ve been , you give an absolutely wonderful hair style to your first few customers. Then imagine within the next few months all their hair falls out. What is the likelihood you would maintain and sustain your new business? But this is the exact scenario played out so subtly in the Fitness Industry. Now, going into my fourth decade of coaching in the Fitness Industry, this “gap of relevance” is what I call the “certification dilemma”.

Truckloads and Teaspoons

Within this gap of relevance, the Fitness Industry has become so one‐dimensional as to be almost unrecognizable. Creativity has taken a back seat to pseudo science and paradigm blindness within the expert base. Organizations are creating CEU’s that year after year are just more of the same of representing complicated methodology as relevant material to study. As a business now, the Fitness Industry insists on creating a bubble of complication only for the sake of having its membership study it, regardless of its relevance for Fitness experts. The Fitness Industry is stuck in the same ideology Warren Buffet warned against when he stated that professional organizations are a conspiracy against the laity. These organizations insist on complicating what is simple, merely so they can create both a source of income and arbitrary criteria to test and evaluate. Yet, what is actually complicated but accessible and relevant, such as the skill‐set of coaching within the industry, remains ignored as an on‐going source of study and upgrade.

To be clear, piling up information like one brick stacked upon another merely creates a wall. With the industry reinforcing this dogma, it ends up with the Fitness expert on one side of the wall, and the potential client on the other. The weakness in this should be obvious. What is needed is a doorway between fitness expert and potential client. This has everything to do with teaching ‘skills of application,’ over ‘bricks of information’.



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By example just within the last few symposiums in the Fitness Industry, these were some of the lectures offered:

1) Lean Body Mass and Weight‐Bearing Activity in the Prediction of Bone Mineral Density in Physically Active Men.

2) Quadrennial Planning for the Athlete 3) The Post‐Workout Protein Puzzle: Which Protein Packs the Most Punch? 4) Theory and Practice of Vibration Training 5) Neuromuscular Control Training Programs to Reduce Lower Extremity Injury Risk 6) Changes in Sweat Mineral Concentrations After Heat Acclimatization 7) Relationship Between Maximal Squat Strength and Five, Ten, and Forty Yard Sprint Times 8) Nutritional Supplementation BEFORE, DURING & AFTER, Resistance Training: Recommendations 9) Time Course of Postactivation Potentiation During Intermittent Submaximal Fatiguing Contractions in Endurance‐ and Power‐Trained Athletes. 10) Effects of Load and Contraction Velocity During Three‐Week Biceps Curls Training on Isometric and Isokinetic Performance. As we can see in these above examples there is an emphasis on information; or worse a finding of information. None of the above lecture material suggests a skill set of application techniques to aid the Fitness Expert to be better at his actual job of being a fitness expert. This seems to be left up to the individual. This neglect assumes a lot. It assumes that attendees at such conventions already have and understand an underlying base of information that we refer to as the basic principles of Fitness. Yet, once again my real life experience in the industry is that many of the experts themselves lack a clear and deep understanding of the underlying principles involved. This lack of a common knowledge, call it the ‘consonants and vowels of Fitness’, make such above lecture material even less viable as useful tools in the Fitness expert’s upgrade of actual skills for working with his clients. What we witness is the staggering overemphasis of speakers and experts breaking down and compartmentalizing more and more useless detail at the neglect of the actual skill set involved within any industry like this one, which is actually service‐oriented. Lectures like the ones listed above are the new smoke and mirrors show which represents knowledge yet are anything but



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knowledge. The application of knowledge as a basic skill set is being ignored and knowledge is being mis‐represented as acquiring more and more information regardless of applicability. To look at the above the question becomes, “how would this lecture help me as a fitness expert, help my client reach his goals?” Implicit within the answer to this question is the mistaken concept that the information provided somehow lends to this answer. Yet none of these above lectures imply the ‘how to’ of being a better fitness professional armed with a more useful skill set for client implementation. Information is not knowledge as is obvious above. Instead as in most industries, information itself is becoming the new dogma. The failure of the Fitness Industry as a business is that it reinforces this myth at the expense of addressing what truly would lead to longevity for a career in the Fitness Industry. As a relationship‐oriented, client‐centred, service industry, the Fitness Industry needs to more clearly and deeply address “application” rather than merely reinforcing piling up information. It’s obvious to anyone that client compliance only will lead to goal achievement. All the information advanced or basic is useless if it cannot be utilized properly within the application of protocol. This begs the question, how much “information” is enough? There needs to be some kind of filter as well as to what information is actually applicable as skill upgrades vs. what information is better suited to more scientific environments. My point is all about the industry blindness toward knowledge acquisition within the vacuum of application skills. A Fitness Expert can have a truckload of information stored in his brain regarding industry knowledge. And what I’ve seen my whole career in this industry is that this truckload of information is useless when the links to application and context are never taught. So the certified fitness trainer, even one with advanced or numerous accreditations, ends up with a truckload of information; yet only a teaspoon of knowledge of application and/or practicality. Coaching and its requisite skill set address this problem of truckloads and teaspoons. Coaching is broader based and is not rooted in empiricism. (If you do not know the word empiricism look it up now.) This is its strength, not its weakness. Coaching is all about the “art” of application. There is no science root to it. This is the blindness within the industry trying to train and create expertise. These symposiums which represent “performing better” for the fitness expert still creates a chasm between “us” (the fitness expert) and “them” (the fitness client) This mentality continues to reinforce the mistake that expertise is something you apply to do “on” or “to” the client; instead of expertise being a resource within the relationship of being implemented as something you do “with” the client. And while many pursue the fitness industry with a passion to learn as much as possible, the mistake is in thinking this makes the person a better coach or trainer. Gaining that truckload of information may be interesting to the pursuant but if it translates into only a teaspoon of applicability or actual value to the potential client; then more is lost than gained. And the emphasis of the Fitness Industry at the highest levels reinforces this mentality.



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This is a failure, not a success of understanding the value of what the requisite skills truly are in the fitness industry. To bridge this ‘gap of relevance’ as it currently exists in the industry, application skills need to be more deeply considered as part of required study and preparation. A sustainable existence for a fitness expert mandates this reality. Coaching and leadership skills trump the knowledge base as far as true facets to long term career success are concerned. Domain knowledge is but a mere component of this skill set. People skills, emotional maturity, and emotional intelligence are far more vital aspects for career success in this client‐centred, relationship‐focused, service industry. It’s time someone who has studied and successfully demonstrated these skills within the industry started speaking this language of context and application: it’s time someone started teaching the elements of coaching and leadership. This is the context within which true domain knowledge is applied. To ignore the context under which domain knowledge content is applied would be like having someone study textbooks on basketball and then have them try to coach hockey. Without a background of context and relevance, the knowledge content of any domain lacks the common sense and reason necessary for the skill set of application. The top Fitness Industry experts all acknowledge the reality of the science and the art of expertise. What I witness is a total emphasis on the science, and a total neglect of the art. The coaching skill‐set is at the centre of this art. And the coaching skill‐set is the focus of the rest of this project.


• What is the true nature of the Fitness industry? How is it best suited to coaching?

• What is the modern certification dilemma, and how does it play out in the industry?

• Examine a few common elements of a coaching skill‐set.

• Discuss the “ugly truth” and the “gap of relevance” of the certification process. Examine

what is missing and what is lost?

• What is the current industry bias, and within it, which essential skill‐set is being ignored?

• Discuss the analogy of truckloads and teaspoons. Examine your own gap of relevance or focus in this regard.



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Chapter 3 Some Basics on the Nitty Gritty of the Coach/Client Relationship

Whether you work in a gym as a trainer; or whether you are an on‐line coach like myself there are similarities within the client‐base. Clients are coming to you because they 1) assume you have a level of expertise that they do not possess, and 2) they want to employ you to use this expertise to help them achieve some specific end or goal. Although these goals and abilities of clients will vary, these underlying points illustrate the nature of the relationship between client and entrusted expert. But what is certainly implied in all instances is a level of trust and commitment on the client’s part. This is illustrated by the money and time clients have invested in the process of hiring the Fitness expert. This fact underlies all that I have been saying. The nature of the Fitness Industry is a relationship‐centred, client‐focused, service‐base. The general nature of this relationship is the focus of this chapter. But it will be explored in great depth beyond this chapter as well. (so keep this in mind)

My realization that coaching talent is the true nature of how I have sustained myself in this industry, has led me to an area of study ignored within the Fitness Industry itself. I have spent a great deal of time studying biographies of great coaches in both sport and industry. I have also undertaken an in‐depth study of world leaders as well. By studying these worlds in detail, some common denominators relevant to the Fitness Industry reveal themselves. However, some distinctions are also true.

In general, there are relevant differences with the coaching environment in large industries like corporations and professional sports. Coaches in these industries are subordinate to a tight management and bureaucratic structure which does not exist in the coach/client world of Fitness. This reality allows for a wider potential of open‐ended environments of interaction and coaching styles. For effective coaches who truly understand the nature of coaching, this can be a huge liberation. However, the flip side is that this reality also allows for total imposters and posers to enter the mix without any background structure for measuring real‐world success. This has led to the enormous pirating of expertise by internet and infomercial hucksters who capitalize on the consumer’s desires for attaining and sustaining real fitness results.

There are consumers in the Fitness Industry who will continue to purchase ‘products’ on the internet or via the infomercial sell, to try to reach their goals. However, there are others who seek person to person guidance for reaching their goals, and these consumers are often seeking ‘coaching’ over ‘training’ although they themselves may not even realize it. On the expert side, there are many potential coaches out there who unwittingly think of themselves as “trainers” and by doing so undersell what is a tremendous talent which often goes unrecognized. By



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focusing on oneself as a trainer, the coaching talents of potential do not get proper and regular attention. For people who have the inherent ability and talent to be ‘coaches’ in the industry, this lack of recognition within themselves is a tremendous loss. Often this is due to a simple but incorrect use of the term trainer and coach in the Fitness Industry as being somehow interchangeable. And as stated previously, this is a mistake. By exposing the difference of trainer and coach in this project, some potential coaches who read this may actually shed their own perceived identity as a “trainer” and launch themselves into the more demanding but rewarding role of “coach”. The first step in the process for many is to just be made aware of the differences, both subtle and divergent.

Thus, there are huge and important qualitative distinctions between the role of trainer and that of coach, within the client‐focused relationship. The ‘trainer’ manages, influences, inspires, and evaluates WORKOUTS. The ‘coach’ on the other hand manages, influences, inspires, and evaluates PEOPLE. If we examine these roles as a component part of a relationship, it is obvious which role will have greater impact and create more momentum and production toward reaching a common goal on the client’s behalf. What will become obvious is that this role of coach is far more impactful than the role of trainer in the Fitness Industry; yet the skill set required for being a capable and qualified coach within the industry remains relatively ignored. The science of training becomes an industry dogma which unfortunately neglects the art of coaching. It’s time the two became mutually inclusive. Moreover, it’s possible to be an effective trainer but a terrible coach. But the reverse is not true. The effective coach will also, always be a skilled trainer as well.

Elements of the Coach/Client Relationship

The number one element for effective coaching is so rudimentary it is almost missed. Because of the ‘business’ side of the relationship in the client/coach context, this element can often be overlooked or misrepresented. Honesty and sincerity are the backbone elements in the coaching relationship. And honesty means truth. When a coach has to forsake this element because of financial need or security, more is lost than is gained. I have learned that an important explanation for my four decades of existence in this industry is this backbone of honesty within the coach/client relationship: Being real and truthful with clients, means being able to risk losing them as well. This industry thrives on the ‘quick fix’ mentality of its consumers. Stepping up and not promising a client guaranteed results or absolute goal achievements is all about being honest and speaking the truth. Many clients may have goals which are incompatible with their lifestyles: Or, they may lack the current commitment for an existing lofty goal as well. This is where the rubber meets the road in the essence of coaching: Honesty. This is something most trainers cannot or do not even address.



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Clients who seek “secrets” or “quick fixes” are not well‐suited to a coaching environment. And it is strong for a coach to tell them so in advance. Often clueing people in to reality is a great stepping stone in forging a relationship. And real coaching is a relationship.

As indicated above, honesty may be the backbone of the relationship, but the nature of the relationship itself implies that the coaching process is an interactive one. Coaching is not something the coach does “to” the client in terms of training, but something he does “with” the client in terms of process. The interactive nature of the coach/client relationship must be emphasized and we will be exploring this in much greater detail. This is not to imply that the prescription of protocol from the coach is some kind of negotiation. No. The coach does indeed prescribe training and/or dieting protocol “to” the client in a one‐way street application. But the process of the undertaking of the coaching is an on‐going and interactive experience. This means that effective listening is an important skill for a coach to develop. And ‘listening’ means being able to understand not only descriptive and explicative elements of client feedback and communication; but all potential nuances involved there as well. So it’s not always just the message which is important, but the context of the message that a coach needs to develop a sound skill set for as well. Many of these skills cannot be taught, merely pointed out so that a willing coach can work on them. But, for an industry to entirely neglect such requisite skill sets, fails to prepare potential coaches for their actual working environment. (We will be exploring these coaching skills deeper in subsequent chapters.)

The coaching process, then, is one which encourages and evaluates a client through building an interactive relationship. The combination of honesty right from the beginning, and an acute ‘listening skill’ for the coach is a specific way to fast track building trust within the relationship. A coach encourages a client from one goal to the next, as a focus on the person, not the goal. This way, the client’s learning is progressive. This serves many ends, particularly building client competence and confidence. And a worthy coach can build on these elements of process, from one application to the next. The focus for the coach is about advancing the person, not just the goal, or the physical skill set of the client. These are secondary in reality; even though they underline the relationship. This attention to client‐focus ends up serving the coach in the long run because the client stays in the relationship longer as there is always more to learn and build on. This reality alone explains why my clients on average, stay with me for a five year period; something unheard of in the Fitness Industry. Therefore, the above bears re‐reading several times over. Moreover, the content above represents obvious distinctions between a coach and a trainer. And this is only the beginning.

As I addressed in my book, The Abel Approach, a coach truly invested in his client puts an emphasis on the client’s experience of protocol. Using appropriate biofeedback cues which give a coach insight into the client’s experience and devotion to application and process; the coach



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is armed with assessments and evaluations which can be poured back into the coach/client interaction. The coach can then pose questions or feedback in a manner that further enhances the client’s knowledge; not just of the process but of themselves within the process. The coach’s feedback enhances the client’s experience. Rather than just tweaking technical changes of diet or training the coach actively seeks teaching opportunities within the communication. For instance, the coach may implore to himself or the client, “what is good or meaningful about this feedback relative to previous feedback? How could you improve it further”?

Because the focus is essentially and correctly on the client and the process, teaching opportunities extend themselves well beyond counting reps and sets, calories or grams. When the coaching question of “how could I improve this further?” is shared with the client; the potential solutions become suggestions to be worked out for the client by the client. The client subtly takes on working on his own solutions or enhancement of his training experience. This is a huge element missing from the context of trainer/trainee. To prepare clients to work solutions themselves, engages them to be more invested in the process and experience of application. People familiar with my coaching know one element of this I call, “keeping it alive”. As the client is given the independence for owning their own process, they are more likely to invest more deeply in it. They remain committed and proud of their own application and experience within it. The difference for the coach in creating an environment of creativity and independence is far and away distinct from the trainer/trainee environment. This is one element that a focus on quantifying results can never offer.

Coaching Client Awareness

I refer to the inclusion of the client in finding his own solutions to problems or improvement, as encouraging “client awareness”. This is far more empowering than merely encouraging client compliance and leaving it at that. So the coach is not just “dictating” protocol but encouraging creativity and initiative within the process of application. By contrast, these current vogue trends in the industry of complicated tempos, complicated formulas, and complicated workouts tend to eliminate the individual from their own experience of protocol application. These scenarios of complication; rather than a focus on fundamentals, only creates client dependence; not independence, within the experience and learning. An aware coach instead, advises and instructs in a manner which gives the client the amount of latitude they can handle within the application of protocol. This serves a client’s need for autonomy, and provides the building blocks for client competence and confidence moving forward. Creating client dependence, as is the trend in the modern Fitness Industry, moves in the exact opposite direction.



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This qualitative difference in a true coaching focus achieves higher performance via enhancing client commitment rather than client control. And this commitment is ‘to the coach’ and then back on to the client. In other words, the client becomes more committed to his own higher performance and awareness. In a true coaching environment; unless there is a competition involved, the client’s physical goal is secondary to engaging him within the process of achieving it.

This suggests a coaching skill set well beyond consideration of training and diet protocol. If a coach is to indeed engage “client awareness” then the coach has to be aware, himself, of the client’s actual working attitudes and capacities. The coach has to be able to interact and acknowledge multiple dimensions of the client’s aptitudes and potential. The coach has to be aware on all three levels of physical, mental, and emotional abilities and awareness of the client. The neglect of the interplay of how a client thinks, their level of understanding and processing relevant information, (mental) as well as their attitudes of employing the strategy toward goal‐attainment (emotional) is a major problem in the Fitness Industry. And this coaching competence is yet another intangible which separates a coach and a trainer by wide margins.

The Triangle of Awareness: The Physical, The Emotional, and the Mental

The goal for effective coaching is to acknowledge the interplay within this trinity. This will be the focus of most of this project when all is said and done. For a coach learning to develop this skill set, it helps to see the trinity as a triangle. It would be nice if the triangle of the physical, mental, and emotional had all equal sides of awareness and ability; but simple assessment of a client will lead a coach to notice certain sides of this triangle may weigh more heavily in client interaction. By mentally employing the triangle model, the coach is better equipped with dealing with client obstacles or client strengths which will coincide more heavily on one part of this triangle. But of course, the triangle model itself implies that all three sides are connected.

Acknowledging this trinity within the coach/client relationship gives the coach several options for engaging the client early on. The imperative first step is for the coach to reiterate his investment in the client and the client’s goals. It’s an important communication for a client to know someone else takes both them and their goals seriously. This is just establishing a working base for interaction within the relationship for moving forward. And the goal early on is to set the old adage of T.E.A.M. (Together Everyone Achieves More) in motion.

The coach, first and foremost, should care. The goal from this starting place is client ‘improvement and progression’. Winning or absolute results are to miss the mark. Seldom will clients just proceed down a straight line of process of goal setting to goal acquisition. This is but



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another myth of the Fitness Industry with its dogmatic representation of process. When dealing with people in real life who have real lives, the process is anything but a straight line. The goal for the coach early on is to get a client excited about his/her work and application in the ongoing process. This is what leads to higher performance and higher performance is what leads to goal achievement. The current paradigm blindness of the Fitness Industry leads people to believe that a special and unique recipe is the answer to their physical goals. This is so misleading as to almost be a lie. And yet this falsehood has been played out for decades in the fitness industry. The current market trend of experts and wannabe experts is to create client dependence by formulating very complicated workout and diet processes and structures to follow. It creates the illusion of control, which I have discussed many times. To micromanage physical application completely misses the point that coaches coach people not programs. More often than not, a return to fundamentals is far more efficient for building client competence and confidence in the process, than is fancy or complicated training or diet protocols. When it comes to such recipes, simple is better.

Client protocol should be set out in as simple terms and formulas as possible. Client application of protocol and what is to be accomplished within it should be clearly set out by the coach in plain and concise explanations. It falls on the coach to take the time to outline what is expected within the application of protocol, both in the immediate and the forthcoming process. Client biofeedback will serve as an ongoing coaching tool for assessing and evaluating relevant client experience of protocol as it unfolds. This is far different and much superior to “program prescriptions” which arbitrarily change just because a certain amount of time has passed. Again, prescribing protocol based on calendar weeks, not client experience, does not include, but negates the actual client. How can something so obvious go so obviously missed for all these decades in the fitness business? The effective coach, coaches the person, not the program. More accurately, the effective coach, coaches the person ‘through’ the program. What is entirely missed by the myopic focus of slotting people into programs is the reality that although two people may actually undertake the same program; no two people will share the same experience of that program. No two people adapt or recover at the same rate. No two people share the same life stressors, and handle them the same. More importantly, two people may vary widely on their understanding of the qualitative aspects of applying and experiencing protocol.

Assuming application as an absolute is the biggest and most common mistake in the fitness industry. For example, a person with 10 years of competitive experience will need less guidance on diet and training discipline, commitment, and diligence, than say a client who has never been active and has little real‐world understanding or preparation for the regimentation required to reach long term cosmetic goals. The experience of both clients within protocol application will mandate a different coaching awareness and skill set. The above explains the



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potential variations of the coaching ‘triangle of awareness’ as to where coaching attention needs to be most heavily emphasized. (i.e. physical, mental, emotional)

In regards to instructions and client application of protocol, clients are not mind readers and neither are coaches. Interaction should be encouraged as the process teaches both client and coach how to improve the qualitative application of any program moving forward. This is how progress truly unfolds. It is not by merely following sets/reps prescriptions etc. Often, a client’s questions can seem like an interruption or worse, an irritation to the coach, who is focused on moving the client forward. An effective coach does his best to eliminate this emotional reaction within himself.

The assumption of interruption or irritation is truly in the coach, a lack of patience. This is for the coach to own. It helps to put the client into some kind of framework so the coach can deal with the client from the perspective of “who the client is” not “who the coach is”. Quick file notes and references can serve the coach to this end. A client may be “inexperienced”, “naive”, “young” ,“insecure”, “educated but not smart” ,“experienced but not knowledgeable”, “passionate but impulsive” etc. Quick reference notes reminds the coach of “who” that client is as an individual, and where they should focus their attention in the ‘triangle of awareness’.

Rather than perceiving questions as an exhausting irritation, questions actually provide the coach with an ongoing assessment tool regarding their actual client and their own working experience on levels of knowledge, comprehension, commitment, and awareness. The coach needs to establish patience as a viable working tool for gaining insight into the client: how they process information, what they know, how they learn, their level of commitment etc. For a coach to focus entirely on workout protocol and application, and only accept feedback about it, is a limited skill which will not serve the client in the short term and especially not in the long term. Because of the focus of the volume approach to clients for financial gain in this industry, patience, the most important coaching skill to develop, is usually the first skill to be surrendered as fiscal needs trump qualitative concerns for the client. Yet patience leads to trust, and both are two key elements to coaching if coaching is to last beyond an immediate here and now focus.

And this is not only an interactive mandate but an introspective one as well. A coach needs to develop patience in his client’s mode of learning and speed of learning ‐ yes; but a good coach also needs to trust in his own level of expertise, awareness, and leadership during the coaching process and application. A coach’s sincere trust and confidence in his own abilities eventually leads to a deeper trust from the client to the coaching relationship as well.



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Riding a Bike

By analogy the role of coach vs. trainer can be explained within the context of a parent teaching a child to ride a bike. The parent does not go on and on about the working parts of the bicycle but focuses on the child “on” the bicycle. This is the difference between a coach and a trainer. To reiterate: the trainer focuses on the bike (the workout); the coach focuses on the person (the child learning to ride). If you watch a parent teaching a child to ride a bike you witness an interactive, qualitative experience. This is obvious yet this is also missing in the fitness industry. One child may be afraid to fall off, another may have a more daredevil mentality; one child may have better balance and learning skills than another etc. How long the parent strolls alongside the bike and holds on to it for the child will vary in time and support. However the goal is always to create independence. The goal is to get the child to be able to ride the bike without parental support. Once they can ride, the child no longer needs the parent oversight. This last sentence is what scares the modern fitness expert. So they focus on creating client dependence so they never learn to independently ride the bike. This is counter‐intuitive.

A real coach keeps focusing on creating one scenario after another to be mastered to the point where the coach is no longer needed for employing that particular skill. So according to the triangle of awareness, the skill to be mastered may be a physical one like actually riding the bike without parental support. Or, the skill may be an emotional one like consistently being able to get back up on the bike after an inevitable fall. (i.e. like clients who cheat on their diets)The relevant point is that by coaching a client to master one skill, the coach can then build on that to engaging a client to master another. The coach should always be working toward client‐mastery to a point where the coach is no longer needed for guidance in that particular skill set. For example, the trust created for the parent, by the child learning to ride the bike, leads to that child trusting the parent to teach him how to drive a car. Encouraging a client to master a skill doesn’t mean the end of the coaching relationship but a progression of it!

Like learning to ride a bike, small successes build on themselves. The coach needs to see past the immediate physical goal. The “bike” is merely one element of a bigger picture. How many children would ever continue to learn to ride a bike if they did not have coaching which focused on building their confidence and competence in doing so? The small initial goal should be employed as a means to improve performance and compliance which builds greater trust and effectiveness with the coach/client relationship. And like learning to ride a bike, the client absorbs and masters a skill which proves to them they are capable of higher performance. (e.g. having or mastering a skill they did not previously posses) Success is self‐motivating. A client should be led in a process of experience, and an experience of process where success can be accumulated and experienced like a Pac Man of process gobbling up momentum as he goes.



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However, the client may be led to successes that were different than the initial goals he set out to accomplish. A good coach can be a tool for the client discovering skill sets that can take them in an entirely different direction.

A case in point is my first mentoring student. Initially, she had goals and aspirations for competing in the Fitness Industry. Over time it became obvious she did not have the requisite physical genetics for doing well. Her commitment to tasks and discipline and dedication were way above average, but they were misdirected toward this goal. Then the pursuit of this goal was causing physical issues counter to her goals. As coach, the triangle of awareness of this particular client was that mentally and emotionally she had requisite skill sets for succeeding in any number of arenas. Her commitment to this particular goal was not only causing physical deterioration but emotional issues as well. (something I see all the time) As a coach, I could not just substitute my judgment for a client’s goals. Most clients will reject such an intrusion. However, because of the triangle of awareness, I knew if I led this client appropriately, her mental acuity and associated skills of organization, process, direction, commitment etc would lead her to discover for herself that her current physical goal was incompatible with her other tremendous skill sets. It was the leading the horse to water analogy. Over time, this client after some back and forth regressions and progressions, found for herself a new calling, based on mastery of ‘riding the bike’.

Instead of pursuing a dead end street of mediocre results in Fitness competition, she has since opened her own personal training studio and is thriving fiscally and mentally/emotionally for doing so. The point is that an aware coach should not be so myopic as to acknowledge only the immediate cosmetic or physical goals of any given client. Within any client and the process engaged of teaching them to ‘ride a bike’ a skill set of obvious client strengths will reveal themselves to the coach. An aware coach will pay due attention to these skills and coach the client in a manner that strengthens these skills further regardless of the immediate goals. Too often in the fitness industry a client’s immediate goals are reached, only by sacrificing skills they have in other areas. As a coach, this is a loss of potential, regardless of immediate gain.

Part of teaching toward mastery of a skill is also acquiring appropriate feedback effectiveness. A word of caution for any coach is the reality of critique. Criticism and reality checks are often required of a good coach. This cannot and should not be avoided. However, critique needs to serve its purpose of moving a client forward, not presenting them with issues of self‐consciousness which can crush such forward momentum. The working adage of “praise in public, criticize in private” applies. Public critique only leads to defensiveness, anger, or paralyzing self‐consciousness. By example, imagine the parent teaching the child to ride a bike at a busy playground or schoolyard. Imagine when the child falls off the bike or crashes it that the parent yells and screams critique in front of other children and parents. Public critique



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creates a reactive mindset, rather than a cooperative one. Obviously the coach seeks a consistent cooperative mindset. This is not to negate criticism, only to instruct to handle it wisely and maturely. Criticism is often an integral part of client interaction and it must be delivered decisively, but also respectfully. Too often on various web forums it’s easy to witness public criticism which was well‐intended spiral into personal attacks and personal agendas. So unless unavoidable, praise in public, but criticize in private.

One of the modes a coach can employ for giving clear instructions is to ask client’s specific questions. Clear instructions can lead to specific questions which can in turn lead back to more specific instructions. Once again, interaction is the key. But unlike sponsoring client dependence, clear instructions and their purpose are to instead foster independence and initiative to spur a client to higher performance standards. Coaching is not about supplying a safe place for clients to land or retreat to.

This is not to say that performance or application problems will not arise. They will and they should be expected. It’s part of being human. The fitness industry likes to present goal achievement as some magical linear process of application from point A to point B. It’s not only misleading but untrue. Process is always non‐linear in both experience and results. For example, each year pro athletes have a training camp to prepare them for the conditioning required for the upcoming season. They do not maintain their conditioning in the off‐season. The same is true for any fitness client. Pro athletes are often sidelined with injury or illness and the same is true of the general fitness client. Non‐linear progress and application of process is to be expected. Life happens. The effective coach uses client feedback for clues as to help remedy any such setbacks, expected or unexpected. However, the coach does not seek to jump in and solve the issue for the client. Instead, the worthy coach leads the client to ways and means to solve issues for themselves. This is what I mean when I say the creditable coach does not supply a safe place to land or retreat for the client. To lead the client to ways and means for solving issues of process or application themselves empowers clients on a deeper level.

The coach with an ego problem, of which there are far too many in this industry, wants to always “be” the solution and create client dependency. I call this ‘glorified babysitting.’ The effective coach, instead, leads the client to find their own solutions, and build the confidence to becoming independent of the coach in terms of future problem solving. The goal when possible is always to empower the client and not diminish them. More often than not, if given the chance and the means, clients are their own best source for problem solving. The coach should not be seeking to be a client’s ‘everything’ but rather the coach serves as a catalyst for the client becoming this themselves.

The responsibility for goal achievement is the client’s, not the coach’s. These things tend to get clouded, especially when coaching is ineffective or immature. The coach’s stake, if it is truly



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genuine, is in the client, not in the results achieved. A further bonus to this role of coach is that the more a client initiates solving his own issues from his own experience along the way, the less value they will place in industry subterfuge presented as marketing techniques and buzzwords, such as “secret” or “advanced” or “fast”. As a client matures in this manner, he begins to see less value in industry trends etc.

So a coach will factor in the reality of plateaus and occasional regressions. Yes the coach is the requisite expert in the relationship but part of this expertise has to be a flexibility of skills that can vacillate between needing to be right in application, and wanting to do right for the client. A coach must be able to give up that need to be right, when relevant communication with the client may be more important to the situation. This is reflective of the interactive, relationship element of coaching and the coaching process and its nature, which is non‐linear. The relationship is not always a one‐way power structure from the coach to the client. The industry is misleading in both regards as to the coach/client relationship and the non‐linear process involved with it.

By example, the industry’s focus on all things physical at the neglect of the triangle of awareness gives clients faulty mindsets when undertaking a protocol. Currently, the industry has over‐indulged the physical application at the expense of client reality. All these formulas which dictate that “specimen A” should be able to lift this much percentage more of max 1RM per week, or that everyone should rest a specified interval according to the clock, negates the fact that all people are different. There is no “specimen A”. Each individual will experience application of protocol in their own unique way. Trying to quantify everything is a mindset of a trainer, not a coach.

Directions from a coach speak to the non‐linear reality of process and application. The coach instructs the person, not the program. Directions within a program therefore must be appropriate to both the client and their situation. Quantifying everything or attempting to is misleading. In fact an over‐emphasis on numbers, as is now common in the fitness industry, can be an added source of perceived pressure for the client. An over‐emphasis on quantifying everything will dilute and dissolve an individual’s qualitative differences. This is not a coaching strength, but a weakness billed as strength. Again without the acknowledgement from the coach of the triangle of awareness, too much quantification kills the program; it does not enhance it. It’s the client’s experience of protocol that matters most. And results and achievements, circumstances and life stressors mean this experience will always be non‐linear in process.



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Guidance Counsellor

As we can see, the role of coach requires being able to wear many hats at one time. Effective coaching is about increasing the client’s learning curve and adaptability to becoming more competent. And competence is an individual skill set which is relative, not absolute. Most clients are undertaking fitness as an indulgence, not an occupation; and the industry is getting entirely too carried away with itself by forgetting this fact. Coaching a client through an issue and helping them figure it out for themselves, gives them a recipe to follow for dealing with similar issues or stagnation in the future. Clients are not automatons. Building a level of client competence also serves to build client confidence. If the coach is paying attention to the triangle of awareness, his coaching will always provide real opportunities to praise good work and valiant consistent effort regardless of outcome. It is not always about the results. To think so is the difference between a mediocre trainer and a competent coach. However, cheerleading the process of client interaction is also ineffective and lame.

True coaching is therefore being part “Guidance Counsellor”. Unlike being a trainer, dealing with people means they are not mere component pieces in the application of a process. Life happens to them and around them. So the two necessary elements of a coach as guidance counsellor can be broken down as follows:

Guidance: the coach gives the client ample direction for them to move themselves forward at their own speed.

Counselling: because the coach pays attention to the triangle of awareness, he is able to help clients be more aware of their behaviour and attitudes and thought process. This can be related back to the client to assimilate in terms of how these mental, emotional, or physical evaluations are influencing their experience of protocol for good or bad.

The coach is still the leader in the relationship of coach and client. But for this relationship to have any lasting integrity the leadership must have boundaries and must have established avenues of trust and respect. For a coach, this means walking your talk. I see far too many wannabe coaches in this industry who are truly needy people wanting attention and validation. They seek “coaching” as an avenue to receive it. Most lack the requisite skill set for even elementary level coaching. I hear from far too many wannabe coaches who tell me they want to inspire people and be a role model; yet their own lives are a mess. Good coaching requires a strong backbone. It requires some personal strength earned in the trenches of life, not the comfort of text books. And a good coach must also be capable of evaluating and assessing the triangle of awareness, and be comfortably able to move back and forth among its three sides. Plain and simple, this eliminates many potential coaches from the reality of the demands of the job. People who ‘want to be leaders’ seldom make good ones, because that desire makes the



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goal a selfish, egocentric one. True coaching is about the other person. The coach must, to my mind, live the example he expects from his clients. There is no better form of instruction. So for a real coach to be truly effective, as Ghandi put it, “be the change you want to see.”


• Address and discuss what the true nature of the Fitness Industry is.

• Do you define yourself as coach or trainer? Do you have any coaching skills based on what you’ve read thus far? Do you have any clients with whom you do more coaching than training? Make some notes how to make yourself more efficient to exercising some coaching skills. What are you strengths? Where could you improve?

• Examine the true nature of the role of coach. Have you been studying any of these skills in your preparation as a professional in the fitness industry? If so, where and how? If not, what do you need to do first?

• What is the central focus for the coach?

• What is client awareness? Is your current strategy one of emphasizing client competence, or client compliance? How could you better marry these two elements?

• Think of 3 of your current clients. Do an assessment of each and draw a triangle of awareness for each client. Where does most of the emphasis lay? What do the sides of the triangle look like for each client? (physical, mental, emotional) You can even make one or two sides of the triangle in bold text for emphasis. Does this help you better understand your client as an individual? How can you use this new knowledge to enhance client experience and client awareness?

• Think of a couple of your clients, and employ the “riding the bike” analogy. Where and how could you improve? Where and how could you better focus on the experience of process, and the process of experience? Make notes.

• Reality check: Examine why you want to be a professional in the industry. Do you have a true “service‐based” mentality? Are your motives genuine? Make a list of skills you have or interactions you’ve had which enhance a client’s experience and moves him forward? Do you live by example? If not, how could you improve in this area?



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Chapter 4 Characteristics of Good Coaches: The Coaching Pie: Slice by Slice

The characteristics of a good coach are marked by one word: Context. The framework and milieus of coach/client interaction is always a subjective and personal, qualitative context. I have been alluding to what makes a good coach throughout the text thus far. This chapter goes a little more in‐depth at delving into specifics of necessary requisite characteristics of a good coach. And the word characteristics is chosen on purpose: While the talent and ability of effective coaching cannot be taught, these component characteristics mark the starting point of attributes which any good coach must possess and/or work on to improve. Some of these characteristics may seem obvious as they exist in most working relationships. However, the talent of coach is one where the “whole is greater than the sum of its parts”. Most professionals do not take the time to consider what this whole even consists of, let alone, do they take time to consider where they may be lacking within it.

Once again, I need to reiterate, the modern Fitness Industry is a Global reality. However, the current focus from the top down continues to focus on the “what” and the “how”. One look at You Tube and anyone can find an endless array of provocative exercises and complex instruction. And there are thousands of website which reinforce the same. This whole emphasis reduces the trainee to an object within the description of “what” and “how”. Yet, if Fitness goals were this easy to accomplish, then the Fitness professional would not have a job. By completely negating the actual individual, the industry continues to ignore its greatest asset. And it also continues to ignore its most basic reality. With on‐line international coaching, whether someone calls himself trainer or coach, the nature of this professional relationship is that it is indeed an ongoing, interactive one. The fact this reality is completely ignored in symposiums and certification studies needs to be addressed and rectified. Clearly, there are many people masquerading as coaches in the Fitness Industry who do more harm than good. The emphasis on this chapter is to properly address in “context” the characteristics involved in good coaching. For the most part, this chapter is fashioned from a chapter in Marshall Cook’s book, Effective Coaching. (1999)

Before addressing each characteristic one by one, let me explain the pie analogy. I like to use the “pie” graphic whenever addressing any complex intertwined idea where the component ‘slices’ are requisite elements to the concept of the ‘whole”. By using the pie analogy, the reader can properly address what slices of their own ‘whole pie’ may be smaller or missing from the whole. It’s a great and effective model to use as a teaching tool. Moreover, the pie analogy reinforces that all slices are composed of these characteristic ingredients which make up the whole. The whole is always greater than the sum of its parts. This is where the difference lies.



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In other words, the characteristics of a good coach discussed in this chapter are here for study. However, the talent of a good coach cannot be attained merely by studying these characteristics. Hence the whole pie is beyond its recipe. Or as I say in this business, “it’s not the recipe that matters; it’s the chef.”

So before examining these characteristics slice by slice, let’s acknowledge that the coaching relationship should begin with the key ingredient of honesty; or at least willingness toward it. But honesty within a professional relationship always needs to pay attention to both context and nuance. All relationships will be different. All should strive for honesty within them. The one constant within this context for professional honesty is that it should be attached to being positive as consistently as possible. This does not mean creating false pretence for positive interaction. It means being adept at diplomacy in interpersonal skills and interaction. And the requisite characteristics involved are the characteristics of a good coach. The characteristics involved require being enthusiastic, supportive, trusting, modelling, focused, knowledgeable, observant, respectful, patient, clear, and assertive. These represent the key characteristics of a good coach in almost any industry or domain. The Fitness Industry’s neglect of this context is one of its most pronounced failures of recognizing the new era of its own reality. We will address these characteristics one by one below.

Positive

Everyone coming into the coach/client relationship will have different skills and abilities and varying realities and life stressors. One size certainly does not fit all. The goal of the coach from the onset is for finding meaning, and creating momentum on behalf of the client moving forward. The goal of the coach is to enhance the “experience” of the client’s application of protocol. Creating an environment of positive energy and being able to sustain it during the nonlinear process of coaching is a key characteristic of a good coach. Effective coaching is all about being able to be positive (not patronizingly so) while still being able to correct mistakes, evaluate client weakness in application, and sometimes even being critical. But moving between these aspects of coaching requires that the client knows and feels the overall energy is in a positive structure and framework. So whether the coach’s feedback is critical or corrective, the client always receives this information within a framework of knowing the coach is always on their side. This reflects the parent/child element of coaching referred to earlier. Therefore, initial client assessment and evaluation should always take this into account. And yet I know very few coaches who even consider this.

If upon initial evaluation the coach feels that a background of positive energy cannot be established; it’s often best to pass on establishing the relationship to begin with. There have been many times in my career when I felt it best to not engage a potential new client beyond the initial inquiry. People are not always going to be compatible with a specific coaching style or



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world view. This is what I mean when I say the coach has to ‘be real’ both regarding himself and his potential influence with a particular client. The coach’s initial assessment and evaluation is not only to determine “who the client is”; but also to ascertain and consider the variables of personality involved which can help the coach realistically determine if he can ‘stay positive’ for the duration of the relationship. We see this all the time in professional sports where a player is just not a good fit with one coach; but moves to another team without incident or issues. We often hear the phrase in professional sports of whether “the player buys into the coach’s system”. This is a very telling statement.

The same applies even in the Fitness coaching environment as well. Optimal performance cannot be nurtured, achieved, or sustained if a positive working environment cannot be established and assured. Fostering a cooperative attitude is at the nucleus of the ‘positive environment’ which the coach must create and be able to sustain. A good coach needs to recognize this can often require a lot of work and effort beyond just presenting a positive attitude.

Enthusiasm

The coach must establish his leadership role in the relationship right from the onset. The coach’s first few interactions with any given client or potential client sets the tone for the relationship moving forward. If a coach’s interaction reflects negativity or even apathy; the results will reflect that energy back to him. The coach needs to be enthusiastic regarding the relationship and the client’s experience of the application of protocol and the feedback provided. It’s not about being enthusiastic regarding the client’s goal; but about the client and the relationship itself. But this enthusiasm needs to be genuine; and it needs to be tendered by the coach in his leadership role. The coach is the leader in the relationship. He is not a fan, not a cheerleader, and not a sycophant. A good coach must be capable of inflecting enthusiasm both for the short term process and the long term possibilities of dealing with any given client. The enthusiasm which must be sustained is for the relationship moving forward, NOT for the establishment of the client’s goals. (Those are for the client to claim.)

Supportive

Being supportive means building on this coaching enthusiasm and the positive context within the relationship. Being supportive is a consideration of nurturing the interactive coaching environment and experience itself. This may go beyond the application of protocol for the client. Being supportive means understanding the application of the coaching experience as



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well. This coaching experience should be able to grow ‘from here to there’ and this can only be fostered within the coaching context which is supportive; both of the client, and the client’s purpose and experience of application of protocol. The interactive coaching environment needs to serve the purpose for supporting the client as the process unfolds. To do so, the coach must be able to make the protocol as easy and suitable for the client to understand as possible. The coach provides the information, devotes his time and energy to client interaction, he supplies the appropriate tools for the client’s understanding of protocol (video clips etc), and he answers questions or troubleshoots in a manner which promotes moving coach and client forward in the process. This is the requisite skill set regarding being appropriately supportive. This can often include guidance for the clients in terms of counselling regarding external negative influences.

I often haven clients who are bewildered by others who deliberately try to sabotage their diets or training protocol by offering their ‘opinion’ or even enticements or critical commentary. And while this example shows that such stressors are beyond the application of training or diet protocol; they can certainly have an impact on it. Therefore a coach being supportive can go a long way to guiding clients beyond external sources of sabotage etc. A coach may also need to serve as a source for countering conflicting information, dispelling faulty information, and addressing inconsistent feedback.

Part of being supportive for a good coach is the ability to employ life experience to anticipate clients’ needs and use interaction as a source of “prevention” in terms of problem solving and foreseeing potential obstacles to a client’s positive experience or application. These things may have nothing to do with the actual physical prescription of diet or training; but instead, have everything to do with who the client is as a person.

Trusting

The first basic about “trusting” is to again accept and acknowledge the non‐linear aspects of performance and real life. Consistency may be more difficult for some clients than others; either logistically or because of mental/emotional blocks to higher performance. I’ve coached corporate leaders and others who travel for a living. Like my good friend Trevor Timmins who is a scout for the N.H.L.’s Montreal Canadians franchise; Trevor may often spend the majority of a day or two day in an airport. He can often be in several times zones in a couple days’ span. He may only have access to hotel gyms and limited equipment. Combined with these logistical problems, people who have a great deal of responsibility can also be called on at a moment’s notice; and therefore be called away from their own pursuit of personal goals.

On the other hand, there are people who knowingly or unknowingly sabotage themselves frequently; or they are just unrealistic about structure and regimentation required to reach



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personal goals. Often people want to achieve personal physical goals only so long as these goals do not require a lifestyle change. The reality of the process of structure and regimentation may be something the client has underestimated.

So for both groups of client, and all others in between, the first circumstance to “trust” is that the process from start to finish in a coach/client relationship is never a linear one. It is never as simple as Point A to Point B; ‘do this, and the results will be this’. Even though this falsehood continues to be the impression the Fitness Industry leaves on both professional and consumer; the first reality to trust in for the coach is that the process and the relationship will be qualitatively non‐linear.

Trust is also a two‐way street within the coach/client relationship itself. A coach needs to be able to trust a client will communicate truthfully and honestly within the set up of client feedback. A coach needs to also be able to trust that a client will indeed apply prescribed protocol in good faith. This is especially true for on‐line coaching. If this kind of trust cannot be established upon initial assessment, it’s best to let the potential client go, and advise him to seek other arrangements. A coach must be able to trust a client will implement advice in good faith. A coach should not have to seek confirmation that a client is implementing instruction to the best of their abilities. Coaching is not glorified babysitting. There is not a single coach in professional sports who concerns himself in the off‐season with chasing athletes or checking up on athletes to make sure they are staying in shape, and doing their requisite preparation and conditioning. The same type of trust is necessary in the Fitness client relationship as well.

Clients will for certain vary in their ability to follow and implement instruction. They will also vary relatively in terms of motivation and consistency. Everyone is different and this is to be expected. The trust, therefore, concerns the willingness of the client to move forward with the coach. It’s not about a client’s ability or level of understanding. Again, the trust has everything to do with ‘good faith’ within the coaching structure and relationship.

Modeling

A good coach models the characteristics he expects from his clients. The ‘do as I say, not as I do’ mantra is not effective coaching. It will eventually serve, even unconsciously as a roadblock between coach and client. Yet we see this reality played out in the Fitness Industry all too frequently. Trainers, trying to build a clientele will have no time to train themselves but will preach time management to their trainees. And other coaches, who coach based on their own past achievements, are just as ineffective. This type of modeling based on past ‘glory days’ only serves a coach’s ego, not a client’s need for a modeling example. To just dictate demands and commands from either ivory tower negates the actual intended message. By contrast, when a



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client can know and feel that a coach is applying the same high performance demands to himself; this mental example is worth a million words. Knowing your stuff, especially text book knowledge; or worse, having accomplished something a long time ago, is not good enough in the real world of coaching. A great coach can go beyond just giving a client a program and diet to follow (the what), but is himself an illustration of how to be disciplined and responsible in terms of demanding higher performance. (the how and the why) Often, a potential client, even a high level competitor is actually more in need of modeling than he is of just a change of protocol.

This type of modeling is not to be confused with physical prowess or application. We are talking here about qualities of character. In studying much respected professional coaches we see what they model is a passion for the job and sincerity in its application. Professional coaches are often the first to arrive and the last to leave. They garner respect as the modeling leaves the player or employee wanting to emulate the same level of commitment and diligence. A good coach should never underestimate that his own actions speak louder than words. I’ve seen few coaches in the fitness industry who even make this connection as part of the equation as to their own effectiveness. Talk is cheap; even or especially for coaches.

By example, we see in parenting the most effective means of prevention for anything is via modeling the exact behaviours. Parents who smoke; yet warn their children not to smoke are still more likely to have children who will take up smoking. Obese parents are more likely to raise obese or overweight kids etc, even though no parent would intend to do so. Modeling is a tremendous characteristic to impart in the coach/client relationship. However, modeling must be sincere; it must be unconscious, and it must be reflective of a lifestyle of living one’s own truth. This is the difference between a wannabe coach; and the truly great coaches who are subject of study in many different fields.

Focused

The good coach needs to have his focus in the right place. Interaction with a client must be focused and must be specific to that client. No two clients will think alike; no two clients will share exactly the same life experience or attitudes. This is true, situationally, in terms of day to day occurrences, or in terms of their attitude toward consistency of applying protocol to achieve specific ends. The coach keeps his focus primarily on the client and the relationship and only secondarily on the prescribed protocol. This is especially true when problems arise or circumstances interfere with the client’s motivation or application of protocol. The coaching focus should always be about keeping advice specific and clear. The application of this advice, for the client, must be manageable, measureable, and particular. The elements of



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‘manageable, measurable, and particular’ do not mean always being subject to the coach’s evaluation and assessment. The focused‐advice in such an example is to give the client something tangible where they themselves, can evaluate and assess how well they manage and measure up to the advice given. As often as possible, focused client‐attention can and should give the client the means for self‐assessment. Focused attention on the client doesn’t take responsibility from them, but re‐channels it, to them.

For instance, I had a client who was terrible with consistency. It was always one step forward and two steps back. The client had not ever put together a consistent effort over a two to three week period. The excuses varied, some were legitimate, most were just rationalizations. So I gave particular instruction that would have a day to day journaling of protocol and accountability to me for a 6 week period. This way, we had a mutual short term emphasis of day to day journaling, and a longer term emphasis which was measureable, the 6 week commitment. It was just enough emphasis to be manageable and non‐threatening. It had just enough support from me to engage the client to a higher performance standard, and the accountability was specific (particular) to the client’s issue of consistency.

Focused attention on the client means not expecting any more than a given client is capable of. For some clients commitment to protocol and consistency is a given. For others this may be the exact problematic issue. Again, the focus is client‐centred; and within this focus, a coach does not expect any more than the client’s current capacities and abilities allow. Clients will progress, or not, at their own rate; not according to some arbitrary expectations of a coach.

Communication Skills: Goal Oriented

This characteristic of a good coach builds on the previous few discussed above. Unfortunately, advanced communication skill is a talent which is composed of many other elements of communication ability and experience. In short, this capacity really cannot be taught or studied to be acquired. This is a skill acquired and developed from experience.

The best coaches can communicate as much from the client’s perspective and attitude as from their own. If I am coaching an offensive lineman from the NFL, my language will be much different and therefore my tactics of communication, than if I am training a shy 12 year old figure skater who has a controlling parent. Obviously in both examples, to focus on the program and not the client is to fail as a coach. A good coach can effectively put himself in the shoes of his client; not to sympathize, but to communicate more effectively. A coach can easily and effectively place himself in his client’s working environment, whatever that may be.



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The coach must be able to relate to the tremendous disparity of knowledge, ability, skill, and environment of any given client. Too many coaches, especially in the Fitness Industry make the mistake of coaching only from their own vantage point. Obviously, if I have a stay at home mom who has gained unwanted weight and feels inadequate and self‐conscious enough to seek on‐line coaching, her real world of experience is qualitatively much different than the competitor I coach, who has already been competing for several years. For me to coach effectively for both clients, I have to be able to communicate to them from their level of reality, not just my own. Communication skills need to be both effective and clear. Communication skills need to also convey a respectful attitude even when delivering criticism. This goes right back to what I consider the fundamental mandate of real and true coaching: and this is the desire to do right over the need to be right. It truly begins here. A good effective communicator can exempt his own pride for the sake of effective communication with a client.

In terms of goal‐orientation, specific communication skills often require being honest and realistic with clients. Many goals presented by a client will not be realistic and a coach does a person no favours by indulging these goals without comment. Client lifestyle or anthropometric assessments makes some goals unrealistic for clients. For example, a 5’ 3”, 35 year old man, who has never played basketball, is not going to make it to the NBA just because he acquires my coaching expertise. And while this example seems obvious, the coach in the Fitness Industry should acknowledge that these types of promises are made and marketed on a daily basis within the industry and its fringes. This week alone, as I write this, I’ve had inquiries from three different people, from three different walks of life, who all want to “gain 20 lbs of muscle, and drop 20 lbs of fat.” Before I can even engage any one of these people as a potential client; I first have to step outside my expertise and explain to each of them, why these goals are unrealistic for them, at least in the short term.

At the same time, to communicate this effectively also means not crushing their self‐esteem, and not deflating their motivation to undertake the process of coaching in order to gain what they think the “20 lbs of muscle gain and fat loss” would add to their lives. And to be able to do this effectively, I have to be able to relate to each of them, from not only my own experienced vantage point, but from their less worldly one as well.

Knowledgeable

Obviously a great coach has to be knowledgeable about his field of endeavour. Most coaches spend decades acquiring real world domain knowledge in a given arena. It’s only the Fitness Industry which seems to lead people to believe they can become experts by studying text books



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or reading industry periodicals; or worse yet, the industry gives the impression that “certified = qualified”.

Football, hockey, basketball, track coaches, etc, all have spent most of their lives in the trenches of the specific domain where they now coach. And by example, you never see coaches who spent their lives in basketball suddenly becoming professional hockey coaches. There is indeed a level of specificity involved in true coaching prowess. Seldom have any of these coaches spent time in “study” of acquiring knowledge to be good coaches. Coaching is a specific and unique talent and ability. Domain knowledge is but a mere component part. The Fitness Industry misleads consumers and wannabe experts with the impression that domain knowledge is all that is required for expertise moving forward. A good Fitness Coach of course should have adequate working knowledge of the field; however, he does not need to be a rocket scientist within it.

Moreover, the coach’s knowledge base should not be a source of pride or arrogance used in the coach/client relationship. I witness far too much of this in the new era of coaching in the fitness industry. Domain knowledge for a coach should merely be another resource for them to tap into during the coaching process. The effective coach again, works with people, not on them. Yes, clients need to be confident of the coach’s level of competence and that he knows the ‘job’ as well as anyone else. However, the elusive aspect for the coach is that this ‘job’ is client‐centred and not information‐based. This is a blind spot for the industry which continues a myopic focus on specialized knowledge at the expense of any focus at all on the real working environment of the fitness professional. A good coach receives greater respect and loyalty when clients feel and know they are in good hands; both in terms of application of protocol; and more importantly, in terms of the coach’s relationship with them during the process. This relationship element of focus must be one of professionalism and skill. Domain knowledge fits comfortably within this frame; but it does not encompass it. The confidence a client has in a coach is directly proportional to a coach’s communication skills; not his domain knowledge. I’ve witnessed some of the smartest and most respected experts in the Fitness Industry give lectures where most people either walked out, or demonstrated tremendous frustration to a level of speaking which was entirely over their heads. These “experts” may be interesting to follow in a lecture format; but they would make terrible coaches on the front lines, real‐world of working with the willing fitness client.

Most of the questions that clients will have are matters for qualitative deduction, not deeper scientific explanations. For instance, I will often get clients inquiring as to the viability of some latest exercise, supplement or health gimmick. (“cleansing” pops into my mind as an example) As a coach, I do not have to know the never ending pseudo science or real science behind a cleanse to understand the motivational factors behind a client’s inquiry about it. The effective



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coach addresses the relevant “why” for the source of the inquiry; not just the “what”. Therefore, while it’s imperative for a coach to study and attain a certain level of domain knowledge; it is only a component part of the job of coaching which is more relationship based. Knowing your clients, understanding their strengths and weaknesses, mentally, emotionally, physically, is a tougher skill set to develop; but far more imperative to effective coaching. Domain knowledge is subservient to the triangle of awareness to effective coaching skill and ability. The more efficient a coach is at coaching individuals as individuals, the better he will coach them. This is true even of a vast majority of people who may share similar needs. Yet because the industry tirelessly and endlessly narrows its focus on exercise and physical affects and effects; the actual interaction with individuals becomes increasingly negated. Indeed, the individual himself is negated. Plain and simple, gathering more scientific information is eventually a losing battle in real‐world coaching. This is especially true for long term career sustainability. Psychologically, the coach who continues to focus attention on gathering information to impress and dazzle clients with his knowledge base is actually making a statement that he is focused on himself more than his client. This psychological reality translates to the coach being less effective rather than more effective within his relationship with clients. Knowledge and information should be shared and delivered as the client’s capacity and awareness dictates. Therefore, being ‘knowledgeable’ is important, but of relative value within the coach/client relationship.

Observation Skills

This is another aspect of the qualitative talent of coaching which is seldom addressed. The Fitness Industry continues to focus an emphasis on a ‘measure and test’ mentality, while effective coaching has more to do with a mentality of ‘observe and evaluate’. For on‐line coaches, observation skills are particularly relevant. Assessing client feedback necessitates advanced communication skills which can intuitively involve observation and evaluation not only of what is being said, but also what may not be being said as well. Observation skills, because they are based on actual individuals rather than programs, can give a coach assessment strategies which effectively and purposely allow him to ‘read between the lines’.

Ongoing communication with a client can foster opportunities for the coach to foresee patterns that are either desired or undesired. The coach can then act promptly and pre‐emptively to reinforce good patterns, or nip potential problems in the bud. The coach’s job once again is to be guiding light and mirror to his clients. This necessitates observation skills which individualize client feedback to see realities the client may be ignorant to, both for positive or negative.



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For example, I once had a client who was also a trainer. He considered himself a ‘high end’ trainer and competitor. Yet, in coaching this client, it was obvious he was delusional in his self‐perception. Regular feedback from this client was filled with inconsistencies and excuses for missed workouts and lack of diet adherence. In fact, this client lacked real‐world commitment on almost every front. He missed and cancelled appointments with his clients; he hadn’t put together even one solid week of consistent and committed dieting and training. This client was all about “appearance” and “posing”. After a few months the client asked for a new program. Yet the client had not put a real week’s worth of training into the current program. I used this as a statement point for a reality check. I had to tell this client, in no uncertain terms, that he was not who he presented himself to be; and not who he thinks himself to be. I had to lay out for this client the reality that by comparison to the hundreds of other people I train and coach, he was the least consistent and committed person I had seen to date. He did not need, nor was he worthy of a new program. He had not worked in a way where he could have possibly adapted to the current program. I also pointed out to him that as a trainer and leader for his own clients, he was dropping the ball. People would not listen to him for long if he didn’t model his own instruction and advice to clients. In this example, observation skills far outweigh the need to measure and test any particular physical skills or anthropometric measurement.

Respectful

A coach like me deals and engages people from all walks of life. Currently, I coach doctors, captains of industry, university professors, high level competitors, both pro and amateur; as well as overweight housewives, all the way to bartenders, doormen, students, and the emotionally arrested. All have varied intellectual, emotional, and mental capacities as well as varied physical capabilities. The effective coach is respectful always of where the client is coming from, and to what specific areas they may lack in terms of reaching their goals. (the coach’s triangle of awareness again) More often than not a given client’s goals may have to be re‐examined and re‐framed in order to be realistic and workable. The respectful coach can and should avoid making assumptions of what a client can or cannot do, or can or cannot handle in terms of feedback and critique.

The true coach begins from a position of self‐respect, which is earned, and then envelops the coaching relationship within it. For the coach, there is no pride to hurt or offence to take because respect for the relationship is a given from the onset. Too often, so called ‘coaches’ can only be effective when coaching clients who think exactly as they do. We witness this divisiveness throughout the fitness industry. For instance, bodybuilders train bodybuilders, competitors train competitors; the ‘egg head, lab coat experts’ caters only to those to whom book knowledge makes sense etc. This isn’t so much because of shared interest, but because of



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limited communication skills and closed minds. For those seeking a career in Fitness, this acceptance for the ‘like‐minded’ only, is limiting for long term prospects, and limiting to the coach’s own personal growth as well.

This stunts the coach’s effectiveness; it does not enhance it. And this lack of respect for a client’s alternative perspective weakens the coach’s potential impact on clients as well. So the coaching relationship begins first, with a coach’s well‐rounded attitude for his own self‐respect. This is not to be confused with arrogance. Self‐respect for a coach is actually more about humility than arrogance. It is once again, about understanding the importance of doing right for the client; rather than being right for validation purposes. With a healthy backbone of self‐respect, not arrogance, the coach can correctly be respectful of the coach/client relationship as well. This is a very mature and advanced coaching characteristic, but it is one guaranteed to sustain the coach in a working environment in this, or any other industry.

Patience

Absolutely part and parcel of being respectful results in a tone and attitude of patience in the coach/client relationship. As already discussed in chapter 3, patience needs exercise to become an ongoing skill and trait of advanced coaching. Patience means the coach is consistently acknowledging the client’s own perspective, relative to his own within the ongoing coach/client interaction and process.

A specific client may be asking the coach a question the coach has fielded one million times already. However, it is still a necessary question from the client’s perspective or he wouldn’t ask it. Patience means giving this question and this client due energy and enthusiasm in response. Its part of the context of being respectful discussed above. A client may indeed be ignorant of information or knowledge a coach may consider mundane or rudimentary. This does not ever mean a client is stupid. The coach needs to be able to understand the client, from the client’s level of perception and knowledge. Anyone who undertakes instruction in a field foreign or unfamiliar to them will be trusting the instructor to not only teach but to meet them with a certain attitude of decorum. Imagine if questions are met with an attitude of disdain, disregard, or even portrayed as being some kind of nuisance.

The effective coach works directly from the perspective that ignorance is curable. And this cure is indeed part of the coach’s mandate. Leadership and guidance requires patience above all else, no matter how busy or occupied the coach may be. An attitude of patience prevents the coach, as well, from engaging clients with a patronizing or arrogant attitude when addressing client inquiries, no matter how simple such inquiries may seem to the coach.



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By example, I’ve witnessed this many times not only in the Fitness Industry from coaches or trainers who lack patience, but in retail attention as well. Several times when I have been to giant stores, where they supposedly are ‘there to help’ I’ve been met with attitudes of arrogance, impatience, and patronizing my lack of knowledge. In particular I’ve seen this at Home Depot where people seem to be ‘inconvenienced’ by inquiries which illustrate a consumer’s ignorance; only to be met by the ‘expert’ who converts the ignorance to a perception of ‘stupidity’. At the same time I’ve seen experts in these places only too eager to help or engage consumers in a friendly, respectful, and patient manner. It’s all about professional etiquette. Whenever I witness such an interaction it reminds and reinforces to me the importance of patience in my own role in a client‐centred business.

The obvious realization of humility for a good coach is that if a client did indeed have the same level of knowledge and implementation and skill‐set of the coach; then the coach would be out of business. So the coach should be respectful and patient to all client inquiry and interaction, because it reinforces his own viability. Once again, serving others appropriately, serves the coach vocationally as well. Moreover, while a question or inquiry may be old to the coach; because he addresses this question from the context of each client as an individual, the coach may answer this question several different ways over time. This only enhances the coach’s communication skills. When employing the element of patience to answering even the most mundane questions, the coach reinforces his own skills from the old working adage that “teaching is like learning twice over”. There is no downside to unwavering patience as a coaching characteristic. There is only tremendous upside, both for the coach in the immediate relationship and service of his client; and in terms of growing his own coaching skills as well.

Be Clear

Having to repeat yourself louder and more slowly (even in regards to attitude and tone only) is an application of arrogance. This is patronizing to adults; and no adult will tolerate this for long. Talking down to, or talking above the heads of clients both tend to treat clients as ‘stupid’ rather than ‘unaware’. Moreover, if a client isn’t getting the coach’s message then repeating it several times serves little purpose. If the client does not understand the coach’s intended message or instruction, then this is on the coach to be clearer. The coach needs to be able to communicate the instruction or feedback from the client’s perspective, especially if there is confusion or lack of understanding.

If real coaching is indeed about coaching the person and not the program, then it necessitates a coach being clear and concise while engaging the client. Communication precision is a requisite skill for a competent coach to acquire. There are many ways of accomplishing this.



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One of the surest ways for being able to reach a client is by use of analogy. Since the true coach coaches the person not the program; he should already have a certain understanding of that individual. To make a message more meaningful and clear for a client, a good coach will think of an example of an analogy to employ that speaks to the client from their own sphere of influence. But it doesn’t end here, because this is still a one‐way communication from coach to client. To insure clarity, the coach should engage the client to reiterate the message back to him in some form. As the client repeats the message or the analogy back to the coach, the coach can ascertain if clarity is satisfied or not. This is an important element of client interaction too often over‐looked. Being clear also implies ensuring this clarity by engaging the client’s own feedback. Once again this reinforces the point to as much as possible talk ‘with’ the client, and not just ‘to’ the client, or ‘at’ the client.

Yet this common sense necessity is so often over‐looked and underplayed, that it becomes an actual characteristic of good coaching; since it is so often ignored. There are tons of examples of fake coaches out there who deliberately talk over client’s heads as a means to try to intimidate them into following instruction and leadership. But this is false leadership, and ineffective coaching. Over time, this approach will only create continued frustration and resentment from this style of one‐way communication. Eventually, one way styles of communication from coach to client only moves the two further apart; not mutually engaged toward the client’s goals. The point about clarity is in establishing and continually reiterating an understanding of the coach’s agenda on the client’s behalf.

I’ve seen this as well even on my own web Forums and other web forums. People come to certain Forums to make posts that are all about the WOW factor of intellect. Yet these people do not seem to realize they fail to have very much impact in the real world of results and application. So, being clear in communication is all about creating a mindset of cooperation, with and for, the client. Talking down to, or talking above the head’s of clients is instead about trying to co‐opt the client to obedience.

Assertiveness

An effective coach must be assertive. The problem here is a misinterpretation of what this term actually means and implies as a coaching characteristic. False confidence is not assertiveness. Moreover, true assertiveness is a strength which should not be confused with aggressiveness, which is a weakness. A coach is a leader and leaders must lead. To do so with anything short of an assertive attitude is to lose the position as a perceived strong and capable leader. Being assertive is about maintaining a strong presence without demanding subordination. In other words, a good coach will be the boss without necessarily being bossy. Furthermore, assertive



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leadership which is client and relationship based‐ not program based‐will garner loyalty and respect. But assertiveness must be sincere, not some kind of act or role playing.

Being properly assertive is to once again re‐address the role of coach. People engage the coach for help in the process of achieving their goals. By analogy, the job of coach is not to make the “horse” drink the water. The coach’s job is 1) engage the horse’s thirst, and 2) lead him to the water appropriately. Assertiveness is about the client engagement, not the protocol. This analogy should be re‐examined on a regular basis for the effective coach to maintain proper perspective regarding asserting himself within the relationship.

Too Many Cooks

All the above characteristics imply the coach keeps an open mind particularly in terms of ongoing client interaction. However, this should not be mistaken for inviting other expert opinion into the relationship on a regular basis. The person has hired the coach for a specific reason. At some point there should exist a mutual understanding of the coach’s knowledge and leadership as the focused structure of the relationship. Arguing differences of philosophy or methodology lead away from the relationship in real terms. This should not be a central or even fringe element of client interaction. Trust in the coach should already have been consistently built upon; it should not have to be consistently proven within client interaction. To do so takes both the coach and the client away from the ‘client‐focused’ element of process, and reduces it instead to classroom type pontificating.

In essence, this leads to that one way type of communication which is destined to break down, not build up. When I say to new clients, “I call all the shots, or none of them”, it does not close the door to inquiry. Instead it serves as an assertive statement as to the structure of the client focus, which is relationship based; not protocol based. In this sense, the relationship element of coaching necessitates the reality for the Fitness client, that ‘too many cooks spoil the broth’. So while there are many ways of doing things or accomplishing goals, engaging consistent interaction over this method or that method eventually leads to a consistent focus of “what is missing” rather than an emphasis on meaningful application of what is actually there.


• Note that all the above characteristics of a good coach are qualitative in nature. They have little to do with sharpening specific skills for quantifying, measuring or testing, client physical improvements. How then are these characteristics viable and essential? To what aspect of coaching do they actually address?



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• Make a pie graph for each slice of ‘characteristics of the coaching pie’. Place it somewhere visible for you to see consistently.

• From your own experience, examine two to three recent client interactions, and use the pie slices as a reference. Where were you weak? Where were you strong? How could you improve?

• Honestly sit back and evaluate the pie graph slice by slice. Re‐graph the pie, every so often, and give each ‘slice’ an appropriate size in terms of which of these characteristics you exercise the most (the largest slices) and which of these you seem to exercise the least. (the smallest slices) The perfect ‘pie’ graph has each slice the same size. In real life, this is qualitatively impossible. So employ your own honest pie graph, with the standard of each slice of equal size. Put the two side by side so you can constantly and consistently exercise the characteristics of whatever seems to be your own smaller slices.

• Also be aware and observe that each client as an individual will also require a different emphasis of interaction at any given time. All these characteristics of a good coach exist in unison but not in concert at any particular time. These characteristics must be flexible to recognizing the client, and the ongoing nature of interactive application of any particular emphasis above. In other words, this pie graph is alive, and consistently changing and flexible according to both the individual client, and the current situation or discourse.

• Examine how the “triangle of awareness” from Chapter 3 is affected by the characteristics of a good coach. And how do these characteristics further enhance the triangle of awareness?



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SECTION 2

Developing Advanced Coaching Skills



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Chapter 5 The Coach and Client Entity

The rest of this book will be about delving much deeper into concepts previously mentioned. The role of coach and the relationship of coach and client will be duly explored from several angles. Thus several themes will be repeated because of their relevance within any given context. And the most basic approach to developing advanced coaching skills is to acknowledge first and foremost the coach “and” client as an interactive entity. To do so, let’s just quickly review the stated and obvious differences between ‘coach’ and ‘trainer’.

Trainer Coach

Focus is on program application Focus is on client

Focus is one‐dimensional: physical Focus is multi‐dimensional: physical, emotional, mental, environmental etc (the triangle of awareness)

Autocratic in application Democratic in interaction

Talks a lot Listens a lot

Dictates Inquires

Fixes and Solves Prevents and Instructs

Presumes and Assumes Explores and Interacts

Seeks Control Seeks Commitment

Demands and Commands Challenges and Evaluates

Works “on” the client Works “with” the client

Puts immediate results first Focuses on the Process

Seeks Reasons and Linear Cause and Effect Seeks ongoing Results in many forms and allows for plateaus, stagnation, and even regressions (non‐linear acknowledgment)

Assigns blame Take responsibility



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Focus is on “what” and “how” Focus includes “what” and “how” but with more emphasis on “who” “why” and “where”. The client is the context!

This list is not exhaustive. It’s included in the column format specifically for quick access to address the obvious and subtle differences between coach and trainer. Notice the differences between the trainer and the coach. Specifically address the differences between coaching a ‘program’ and coaching a ‘person’. And while the coach also assumes the role of trainer, as discussed previously; the reverse is not necessarily true. From the above it’s clear that coaching is a special and unique individual relationship between leader and follower. The role of coach has little to do with “information” once a certain level of knowledge has been acquired and practiced. A coach cannot achieve results without good clients. Usually the perception here is that it is the client who seeks achieving results. Yet the coach himself also seeks results, although properly stated, the coach’s results lie within the client’s application and progress. So the circle begins where a client seeks coaching in order to achieve some kind of goal. The coach can only help the client progress to and beyond the goal if the client is indeed a good client. For the coach, making the client become “a good client” should be a conscious and concerted project of the coach. This is achieved by fostering the coaching relationship as the priority with emphasis on protocol, yes. But making a client into a “good client” lies well beyond the applications of programs and diets. Consistency and compliance are necessary for any measure of achievement, for both coach and client. This is the entity to which I referred above. Ensuring these, consistency and compliance is the number one priority in terms of beginning a process of coaching evaluation and assessment: as well as continuing and evolving the “coach and client entity”. Coach Gambetta said that the coaching role progresses from guiding light to more of a mirror. I’ve found that a great coach can do both for the duration of the coaching relationship. In order to begin this, the coach must be observant, articulate, and confident enough to be honest. However, to properly engage and challenge a client requires both tact and diplomacy. Each client comes from his/her own level of understanding of process demands. The coach must properly engage a client with a style where the client takes over the responsibility for achieving their own goals. There is neither ownership nor credit for the coach in the client’s achievements or non‐achievements. The coach is the guide; nothing more. A great coach prepares the client to always be able to hear the truth, (reflection and mirror component) good or bad, as far as evaluation and assessments are concerned. This guiding hand should compel the client to be able and willing to act on the coach’s feedback. So, having a good client is not a given. It’s the



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coach whose style and technique form the coach and client entity so that the client is a “good” client. Real coaching is individualized on many levels and each particular coaching relationship will be unique in terms of elements of coaching focus and guidance and instruction. The emphasis of the coach and client entity is on interaction, as well as the ongoing physical process and application. In this sense, the coach coaches one client at a time: Hence, the determination above of the “coach and client entity”. Effective coaching is based on client‐interaction. By comparison, the current industry one‐way street emphasis of ‘coaching‐ dictation’ is not only incomplete but practically incompetent, regardless of knowledge base. Instruction such as, “do this program for this many weeks, and then do this” negates the qualitative differences among individuals. It also negates the relationship element upon which the coach and client entity is founded. This is a profound area of neglect in the fitness industry. It’s weak and it’s incomplete. Instead, by taking part with the client in and during their process of application, all kinds of opportunities for coaching present themselves; both for the physical protocol and the actual client. This is not possible if the coach is not present to take notice and offer feedback. What seems glaringly obvious; for true coaching and guidance is completely ignored in the industry which focuses on “instruction” over “guidance”. As mentioned in chapter 4, “awareness coaching” is the most natural and effective kind of coaching since it comes from a shared context or field. (the coach and client entity) However, it should be noted that in the Fitness Industry this kind of real coaching is less common because it requires greater skills and attention on the coach’s part. The nature of the emphasis of client interaction is often ‘stated’ in the Fitness Industry, especially among the internet marketers; yet very few have any idea what client interaction and engagement actually means. Listening and responding honestly to a client from a base of knowledge and skilled communication is far and away more effective coaching than the industry myth of just “providing” protocol and advanced information. A client has expertise of tremendous value to a worthy coach. The client is an expert on himself! Even the self‐deluded client gives the coach pertinent information and insight into how that specific client thinks and feels about his goals and the ongoing process of achieving them. Learning and acknowledging a client’s aptitudes and attitudes is absolutely essential for effective coaching; and absolutely essential within the coach and client entity. No one can coach a client they do not know. Yet, the industry continues to perpetuate this myth at every level of accreditation. The industry continues to nullify the coach and client entity, by emphasizing that programming and application are something you do “to” the client, instead of “with” the client. One‐way dictation of application is not dialogue and not interaction. It’s very weak instruction at best. And it’s a facade the



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industry currently hides behind as it continues to “certify” people at all levels without any acknowledgement of the interactive necessity of process and application. Therefore, protocol must be matched to a client’s capabilities, not necessarily their goals. The aware coach knows these two elements are often not mutually inclusive and more often than not are centred on industry dogma and internet/infomercial gimmicks and promises. End results are often an illusion created by the commercial and cosmetic side of the industry. For example, before and after pictures where the person never maintains the “after” status is misleading to many consumers in this industry, yet becomes the marketing absolute for perceived goal setting and attainment. This is faulty thinking, and clients need to be dutifully engaged to understand this deception. Instead, the coach and client entity is about a focus on the journey. It’s a focus on the client’s perceptions and experience of himself within that journey. This will have the end result take care of itself. The coach’s goal is on the process and more importantly client ‘mastery of process’. This way ‘the goal posts keep moving’ as the saying goes. So, properly engaging the full entity of coach and client means getting the client to focus and emphasize on the process at hand, not the goal. Motivation cannot be sustained long term, for diet or training, if the focus is primarily placed on results and not the process of getting there. This represents another of the one‐dimensional mistakes made in the industry. Immediate application only leads to absolute results in the long term. For example, no TEAM in professional sports gets to the final championships by emphasizing the final championships from the start of training camp. Instead they know and work toward this goal with an emphasis on the process of “getting there”. The emphasis at this level is all about one game at a time and the preparation involved for each and every game at hand. The same should apply in coaching a fitness client to a long term goal. Immediate application only leads to absolute results in the long term. In contrast to the professional sports example above, we see the opposite in such examples as “New Years Resolutions”. There is a reason 98 % of such resolutions fail. It is easy for any client or person to report to a coach of being “more motivated and inspired than ever before”. “I’m willing to do anything” or “this time nothing will stop me”, are very common threads of expression when clients undertake physical transformation goals of diet and training. Such statements are usually made in the immediate without any contemplation or regard for the long term process of actually achieving these goals. The good coach cannot take such claims at face value. Everyone is duly motivated before an undertaking. But once the dieting and training demands ensue; with their concurrent emphasis on sacrifice and discipline, a client focus which is only on the long term goal (like a New Year’s resolution) will not likely sustain motivation and



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inspiration for the course of time goal‐acquisition will demand. Therefore the coach and client entity is about instruction and guidance through the course of the process undertaking. Many clients with physical transformation goals may also not understand that even if they achieve these lofty goals, they may not be likely to be sustained long term. Therefore, engaging the client to focus on the actual process of application serves the immediate, the residual, and the long term requirements for continued success. This coaching reality is what separates the New Year’s resolution‐types of goal setters from the professional sports champions mentioned above. The difference is in the quality and style of coaching people, not programs. And this coaching takes place more in the mental sphere of the triangle of awareness than it does in the physical sphere of programs and diets. It’s about the process of application yes; but also about a client’s individual ongoing experience within the process as well. The coach and client entity must acknowledge both the non‐linear aspects of performance as well as creating opportunities for clients to gain positive momentum by reaching even very small goals during the process of application, and the application of process. So, the effective coach knows a client is succeeding when they are focused and staying on the right path within the process. This emphasis is not on sets and reps, calories and grams, but focused attention on the process of “doing”. Goals are absolutes; the experience within reaching them is always relative. And this is the essential acknowledgement in the coach and client entity. This is also what necessitates follow up and interaction within the coaching relationship. Merely dictating protocol for a specified time period is arbitrary (actually even lazy) and it does not properly consider or engage the client. If true goal attainment was only about the protocol, then by now, the modern digital environment would have solved everyone’s problems for achieving and sustaining cosmetic results. Anyone can go on You Tube and get thousands of variations of exercises and techniques. Major Websites advertise and promote systems of training all the time, month to month, sometimes even week to week. Yet trainees continue to fail to reach targeted results and most quit and give up entirely within a fixed period of time. Programs and diets are not about people; therefore they will always be a hit and miss proposition. Coaching is the relevant people‐oriented connection of client to program. Even with effective and proper instruction so widely available; if the training and diet experience is not matched with some kind of follow up, then there is no measure of relevant qualitative assessment and evaluation. By example, this is akin to leaving grade 3 students on their own to decide if they are ready for grade 4. Capitalizing on learning opportunities and teaching opportunities is negated if consistent follow up is not a viable outlet for the client in the coach and client relationship entity. It’s this reality that leads to what I call “pinballing”. The modern trainee ends up bouncing around from one program or workout to the next without a relevant context to abide in and learn from. This even happens



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en masse where we witness various Forums groups members pontificating and commenting on systems of training or diet, that do not elicit true evaluation and assessment for a trainee’s progress, but merely instead, on‐going opinion and editorial dressed up as expertise. The non‐physical realm remains completely ignored by the industry in terms of relevance. Yet the triangle of awareness is the specific strength of the coach and client entity. Clients may need to be consistently reminded over time about the bigger picture aspect of their goals. This has everything to do with discipline in process, and the process of discipline. Beyond the physical protocol itself is the necessity of lifestyle focus for true long term goal acquisition and continued progress and sustainability. A client must learn to understand, in qualitative terms, the reason behind their work and efforts if they are going to truly value and embrace the results of both. To reiterate, this element of coaching, what I refer to as the coach and client entity is virtually ignored in this industry. “Coaches” instead are reinforced to the illusion of a very narrow and myopic focus and vision that only entertains the physical realm and end results. This is not coaching. At best, it is mediocre training. And this approach is completely limited in scope. This is why the concept of the coach and client entity is such an important consideration. There are elements of lifestyle which will always factor into the client’s training and diet regimen. And there are elements of personality which effect the client commitment just as equally. For example, when clients are at the highest levels of challenge (say, strict dieting for weeks and weeks, and body fat is now low to the point where it has consistently affected hunger and energy), there is often a tendency to move away from the committed goal. This happens frequently and it’s up to the coach to re‐engage the client to focus on the process, not just the attainment of the specific goal. However, coaches who merely focus on the physical realm also tend to lose track of the focus on the client’s process of moving forward. In so doing, as the goal acquisition is immediately pending, instead of a sense of achievement and celebration, the negligent coach is actually only adding an increased sense of pressure to the process. The coach and client entity should always be properly focused on the process of the application of protocol. This must take place at the pace a client’s lifestyle, capability, and understanding allow. Assigning arbitrary time periods, and linear time tables are not only unrealistic, but they add pressure to people who pursue fitness as a lifestyle commitment, not a career. Another difference within the coach and client entity is the nature of the focus of process. Realistically, if a client is not progressing toward their personal goals, or more importantly, if they are not experiencing growth and challenge and enjoyment within the process, they are not likely to stay on course. (They are also not likely to stay with the present coach or trainer either!) What the industry misses all too often is that coaches need to understand a client from



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the position of the client. The coach and client entity works with the client from here. In contrast, the Fitness Industry has coaches and trainers mistakenly embracing the notion that they work with clients from some advanced knowledge base. To understand the job beyond the job, the true coaching focus is about guiding the client to move on, well beyond their current position or goals. This has little to do with the client’s physical goals and more to do with appropriately engaging the client during the process of application of protocol. The goal is to enhance the client’s subjective experience and level of personal awareness. This takes tremendous skill and competence in the role of coach. But it also, once again, illustrates the difference between high end coaching compared to mediocre trainer application. Since the coach and client entity engages the client from the client’s own level of understanding, there is a stark difference in the nature of the process. While the industry continues to reinforce assessing clients and working on their weaknesses; the coach who is engaging the client from the client’s own level of awareness, knows this to be counter‐intuitive. The coach more appropriately works to a client’s strengths while managing his weaknesses. Once again this serves to make the process more challenging and enjoyable. For any client in any realm, this type of engagement is more likely to secure ongoing commitment and a positive experience. It begs the question how this fact of human interaction can be so widely missed and negated in the fitness industry. And the answer is because the role of “coach” is never properly addressed. Since effective coaching is all about dealing with the client, from the client’s level of awareness it also means the coach not assume too much regarding that awareness. An effective coach needs to follow the steps of always “crawl before you walk, and walk before you run” within the coach and client interaction. Client interaction and more importantly client instruction should proceed in a one step at a time teaching environment. It’s better always to go too slow, and repeat yourself as a coach, than to throw too much at a client at one time. This is especially true in the early stages of the coach/client relationship. What is old hat, common knowledge for the coach may be brand new and intimidating to the client. Since the goal is to build client confidence and competence, a coaching mentality of crawl before you walk, baby‐steps application, makes good sense. This also reinforces that the relationship focus must be properly centred on the client’s level of awareness, and not solely on the coach’s knowledge base. One of the most effective means of implementing advice and instruction in this way is via example. If the coach can aptly take a concept a client does not understand, but present it in a form or story or example from the client’s own sphere of influence, then clarity and learning is more likely. Analogy and metaphor, considering the client’s perspective and not the coach’s knowledge base, serve as fantastic coaching tools within the coach and client entity. However, this also begets a discussion of praise and criticism within the coach and client entity.



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Praise and Criticism

Praise and criticism are part of any real coaching environment. And both will vary in every single client relationship. All clients are different. Often how clients accept and handle praise and criticism will give the coach a great deal of pertinent information about the client. However, on the coach’s part, how and when praise and criticism are delivered can mean the difference in client progress or client stagnation and failure. My own early background in high level performance competitive sports led me to believe at a young age that high praise and harsh criticism were part and parcel of performance coaching. This is certainly true in competitive sports. However, it is not true in other coaching, teaching, and guidance environments. Once again, delivering client praise or criticism is all about understanding and being adept at nuance. For example, good athletes do not seek consistent praise, and they will be sceptical of receiving it as well. This will also be true of any client who has realistic goals and a realistic understanding of what will be required to achieve them. Not all clients will have this level of comprehension. The caveat here is that if praise is a consistent application or given just for following instruction, then over time said praise will have far less impact and meaning to its recipient. Rewarding someone merely for following instruction sends the wrong message. Rewards must vary according to the levels of performance capabilities of a client. Praise cannot be a structured consideration to approaching client feedback. It must have meaning and context. To institute praise as a structured component to client feedback is a fake and phoney implementation. A good coach must consider the long term consequences for client receiving praise that is unearned. And clients following instruction should be expected from a coach. It should not elicit praise. However this is different from client encouragement and empowerment. (We will address client empowerment later) A client should always be encouraged toward a sense of mastery of performance and protocol. In this sense, encouragement is praise. For example, a parent should always encourage a child to do their homework; but not offer material rewards or pats on the back for doing so. The long term requirement of a child to “do” homework means the child must internalize the necessity to do so, and want to do so, and see the need to do so, on his own. Encouragement, allows the child to find his way to this expectation. But rewarding a child for performing a requirement of being a student will not lead to the child internalizing the necessity and value of its pursuit. The same reality exists in the coach and client entity. A client should always be encouraged toward that sense mastery of defined tasks and disciplines required for goal acquisition. But encouragement in the process should not be confused with praising a client merely for following instruction. This part of application should be expected.



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This expectation from the coach to the client needs to be acknowledged right from the beginning, either implicitly or delicately. This encouragement toward performance mastery can be destroyed by too much coaching interference and instruction. Once again, this is a current vogue mistake in the Fitness Industry. Too much instruction, like we see on all these industry websites sends the wrong message to trainees. Crazy training tempos, mathematical formula’s; fancy exercises and complicated equipment can be overwhelming. When put into a client protocol application, it all leads to self‐doubt, the opposite of performance mastery. All these external cue emphasis of dogmatic application and prescription of protocol only incite a perception of right and wrong for the trainee. This leads to a result of a pressure to perform rather than an understanding and mastery of the prescribed protocol and its experience. Too much instruction is faulty and unnecessary, and once again concentrates too much emphasis in the physical realm at the expense of the triangle of awareness in coaching. Overtime, such an emphasis makes the process cold and meaningless, rather than alive and interactive in consideration of a client’s own performance awareness. A coaching emphasis based on ‘demands and commands’ engender a sense of obsession and often even desperation among clients. This is usually at the expense of passion, commitment and self‐expression. These are the things the coach ‘should be’ encouraging. Over‐instruction and presentation of protocol as some kind of absolute alienate a client from even being able to feel or sense their own level of improvement or performance. Then they end up seeking coaching confirmation for whether what they are doing is “right” or not. Because of the confusion and unnecessary complication of protocol, clients end up seeking validation or praise rather than being encouraged to test themselves within the application. So, too much emphasis on the protocol rather than the client, leads to situations where praise exempts encouragement. And yet this has been the status quo of the industry for decades. Yet praise and criticism are also not mutually exclusive either. They can be necessary both at the same time. But praise and critique need also be balanced as well in order to be constructive. A client may warrant critique but be in need of praise at critical times during the application of process and within the interactive learning environment. One such situation which tends to frequently present itself is in the diet application. A client can often be coasting along swimmingly well at dieting and then fall off the wagon, so to speak. So while interaction needs to address and critique how and why the slip happened, interaction also needs to be supportive of how well a client has done up to that point. For instance, in this case the client can be engaged to recognize for all actions there are results and consequences, and the diet indulgence has definitely sabotaged the end goal. At the same time the client can be praised for how far they’ve come by committing so far to the diet in an uncompromising manner. The



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client can be reminded they are indeed human, not a robot. So a sense of praise and encouragement in this case is also balanced with a rational element of critique. And notice in this example, the requisite interaction has little to do with the physical realm other than the behaviour itself. When coaching is properly and dutifully placed within the coach and client entity as it should be, then the diplomacy for proper balance of critique and praise is easier to come by. As hinted at previously regarding praise: it’s important to build client‐confidence, yes; but not false confidence. To reiterate the lesson in the above example: The coaching client may require critique for mistakes or misapplication at the exact same time he may require praise or encouragement to have a proper sense of competence and confidence to continue even while addressing whatever mistake is being addressed. There is no punishment or embarrassment to assume. Often when critique is called for, there is a tendency for some coach to develop and exercise what are known as “avoidance tactics”. For a coach to avoid or refuse dealing with a difficult issue requiring critique, only delays a situation which will certainly be more pronounced by the time it is addressed. Not correcting, advising, commenting, or addressing poor performance or other elements of client self‐sabotage not only allows these issues to fester and grow, but they can become patterns as well. The expression in legal parlance is “silence construes consent”. This is an important axiom for a coach to embrace within the coach and client entity. Anything less than dealing head on with difficult issues that necessitate critique is ineffective and impotent coaching. Again, a coach’s silence on such matters means he either doesn’t care or he endorses the actual circumstances by not addressing them. A coach needs to be a strong enough leader to be able to deal with such issues as soon as they present themselves. Popularity or likeability is less important than respect and leadership within the coach and client entity.


• Address the two columns regarding the difference between trainer and coach at the beginning of this chapter. If you had to score yourself somewhere between each category, where would you fall? Draw a line connecting each point across of trainer to coach. Then mark where along this line your current focus and abilities lie. How and where could you more effectively improve your coaching focus? Come back to this column especially when evaluating your own performance and emphasis with specific clients.

• Address and discuss the coach and client entity. Specifically for yourself, what points are most relevant as teaching tools?



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• What element of ‘expertise’ does every single client bring into the coach and client

relationship, regardless of knowledge or ability? Explore how this helps you as a coach.

• Why is ‘mastery of process’ so important for the coach in terms of coaching his clients? What lessons are learned from the pro sports arenas in this regard?

• Explore and compare the coaching example of the ‘New Year’s Resolution’ type of client, to the pro sports example. Discuss the difference regarding the elements of focus. What common mistakes are made by those who fit the former category? What lessons does this offer you as a coach in terms of client evaluation and instruction?

• Think of an actual example where you could employ the use of metaphor or analogy or storytelling to help a client relate to a relevant teaching point.

• Why is it more important to work to a client’s strengths in terms of coaching focus and process? What is the added value for the client?

• Consider the differences between praise and encouragement. Think of a real‐life example where you could demonstrate the difference.

This list is not exhaustive. It’s just an easy comparative reference table.



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Chapter 6 Coach as Teacher

As I’ve stated throughout the text thus far the most important factor for a coach to address is that the nature of his job is one that is relationship‐oriented and client‐focused. Within this context, the role of coach is a composite of many different relationships coming together. Sometimes I use the analogy of parent and child to illustrate the coach/client relationship. Yet, even within the parent and child context, the parent also plays an obvious role as teacher. So, while I make comparisons by analogy of the coaching relationship; these comparisons are not literal, but rather instructive. The coach is a component element of many relationships, which we may use to better understand the job of coach. However, the job of coach is one which is also unique unto itself; so these comparisons are illustrative for sure. Examining the various roles or obvious comparisons to other leadership roles is a very useful tool for understanding not only the role of a coach, but the person who is coach. And this is extremely important for effective coaching.

So, while the parent/child relationship yields some useful means of understanding the coach/client relationship, the teacher/student relationship is a more apt representation of “context”. We can all recall good or bad, exciting or boring teachers from our past. When we do so, we realize that it wasn’t so much the material being taught that made the learning experience what it was. No, what lent to our learning experience being either exciting or boring, meaningful or meaningless, was more often than not entirely about the teacher. Teachers who connect to their students have more impact on them and enhance the learning environment for the student. The take home message here, regarding effective teaching is that it has far less to do with domain knowledge than it does with teaching skills and elements of personality. Teaching goes beyond instruction. All teachers instruct. The difference between a truly effective teacher and a non effective teacher, then, has little to do with the curriculum and everything to do with the teacher himself. Ironically most of us will also recall, not by coincidence, that our favourite teachers were also the ones from whom we learned the most “material”. For the potential coach in the Fitness Industry, these lessons need to be explored.

Coaches need to realize that a simple or deep knowledge of the job has little to do with an expertise to being able to teach it effectively. While trainers run around looking for what’s new, and seeking more information, the coach focuses on what is relevant. And for the coach as teacher, the most relevant question to ask, is “who is my client?” Teaching begins from this point of relevance. Once the coach answers the question “who is my student”, the nature of the relationship is different. Effective teaching is about fully embracing and understanding that the coach is not teaching a “what” here; he is teaching a “who”. This doesn’t negate the need



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for a working mastery of the subject matter. But it does put it in its proper perspective. If the goal is to be a great coach/teacher, then subject matter is secondary to establishing an effective relationship with the client/student. The truth to embrace here is that the coach as a teacher teaches CLIENTS, not MATERIAL. This is a fundamental difference from the “trainer mentality” so heavily endorsed in the Fitness Industry.

The first consideration for most coaches in the Fitness Industry is that coaching people has everything to do with respect. Effective teachers never consider their students “stupid” just because they may be ignorant of the subject matter. To patronize adults with an attitude of superiority is not coaching. Lecturing, if you will, is as non‐effective for the coach/client as it is for the parent/child relationship. It is seldom effective because it is one way discourse. And when coaching adults as most coaches in the Fitness Industry will be doing; lecturing them from a position of elitism portrays disrespect. Most potential students will turn off and tune out to this approach to teaching. We hear of this example a lot as well in the medical field. All of us know someone who was frustrated by a Doctor talking way over their heads with a patronizing attitude toward their own medical care. The same mistake exists in the coaching relationship in the fitness industry as well.

The most elementary mistake made in the role of teacher is forgetting it is the student who is the focus and not the teacher. Incompetence is often displayed by coaches who focus on their own intellectual prowess, their own mastery of the subject matter, and their own implementation of industry jargon and buzz words. When teachers do this, they simply build a wall to understanding. More often than not they do this deliberately to intimidate students in order to avoid confrontation and create dependence. Speaking in jargon and buzzwords does not illustrate mastery. Mastery is not something that is “shown off” but is instead illustrated in the capacity for the student to learn and make consistent progress. This mistake is one of the hallmark faults of the coaches in the Fitness Industry. This mistake only serves to delay true learning and competence of the student. Incompetent coaches continue to focus on the minutia of “stuff” at the expense of understanding the importance of making client willingness and compliance fit well into their own personal lifestyle and sense of well‐being. Far too many coaches in the Fitness Industry continually memorize dogma without an understanding of nuance or context. They never ask the question “who is my client?”

For example I have a colleague, who like many is a seminar junkie. He is off getting certified at something within the industry almost every weekend. His goal for some 20 years now is to be an influential and productive coach in the Fitness Industry. Yet, he has failed. He has few clients, and very few who stay with him for any length of time. He continues to “gather information” at the expense of never asking “who is my client?” He employs industry buzz words and vogue training trends, without ever sharpening his teaching and coaching skills. The result has been



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failure, not success. Like many in the Fitness Industry, my colleague has been misled to think information is knowledge. Not only is information not knowledge, but not being able to effectively teach acquired knowledge is the difference between successful coaches in this business, like myself, vs. the case of my frustrated colleague. Because my colleague is so focused on continually gathering information, he also makes the mistake of trying to teach too much at once to his students/clients. Clients, like any student, get too overwhelmed when presented with either too much information or information which is over their heads. At the same time these students end up being too intimidated to ask for more complete explanations from the teacher, or to admit information overload. In the end the coach is actually frustrating his clients by trying to impress upon them what he knows. He forgets the central focus of the relationship is the client, not the knowledge base. The analogy I use in seminars is that a good teacher certainly wouldn’t give a grade 6 student a grade 9 math text. Yet this is exactly what keeps playing out in the modern Fitness arena. The crucial mistake of my wannabe colleague and so many others in the Fitness Industry is they are focused on themselves and what they know, rather than focusing on that individual client, and what this client needs to know right now to move forward. From there, the next step is to guide the client to both absorb and apply this guidance quickly and effectively. By focusing instead on gathering information, the wannabe teacher/coach actually nullifies his own effectiveness. The coach must acknowledge and embrace that learning and personal progress varies for each client/student. Progress takes place at the pace of what the student can understand and apply not what a coach knows and dictates. This fundamental mistake, so heavily reinforced in the Fitness Industry via certification and accreditation, is one of the main reasons so few people with good skills and domain knowledge, actually make it and survive in the industry.

The Homework Analogy

So in the relationship aspect of being a teacher within the coaching relationship, the coach never pretends or acts to be any better or smarter or more important than their client. The coach is not superior, only his role of teacher is so. The coach must understand that his role is essentially to be a catalyst in the process of growth and application of the client. This is coaching success. Client goal‐acquisition is actually secondary for the coach as a teacher. As a teacher, the essential question for the coach to answer after “who is my client?” is “what is the appropriate ‘curriculum’ for this individual”. In its proper context, the ‘curriculum’ for any given client goes beyond just the prescription of training and diet protocol. How a client will apply and can apply protocol within their own lifestyle demands and environment must be adequately assessed by the coach. Real‐world applicability and client expectations are usually not simply compatible with text book knowledge or the implementation of vogue training and



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dieting trends. To this end, a coach indeed has valued knowledge and instruction to share within the coaching relationship. And this role of leadership can exist beyond mere protocol. An effective coach as a teacher has to be willing to invest time and energy and savvy into the coaching relationship, AND the client. But this is not the manner of coaching currently taught in the Fitness Industry.

For example, yesterday I had a person order a “One Time Custom Diet” from me. The person is also a personal trainer and an overweight one at that. In her initial assessment, she included commentary that she has a “raging sweet tooth”, and that her husband lives on junk food. She further rationalized that with young kids in the house, there was always junk food around. For me as a “teacher”, I needed to focus on not only the “One Time Custom Diet” and her current dieting mistakes, but her environment and rationalizations she makes regarding her current circumstances. I was quick to point out that a diet regimen from me does not change that she will always be around junk food. A diet from me does not alter the “circumstances” which she currently lives under and cannot solve. (Again, the triangle of awareness) I instructed that her consistent rationalizing of why she eats junk only defends that behaviour which makes it more likely to continue. I suggested, instead, that she put the money paid for the One Time Custom Diet toward coaching; because what she really needed was “oversight”. Her assessment and evaluation led me to advise her as to what the appropriate “curriculum” would be for her. And a “diet” prescription was not likely to change her behaviour long term.

When a client hires a coach, not a trainer, in the fitness industry the process of the teaching role becomes qualitatively different. When a fitness coach assigns a client a training program and a diet, they are essentially giving them ‘homework’ to do and accomplish. And this is where effective coaching must be emphasized for its qualitative distinction and effectiveness. Earlier I referred to the parent as also being in a teaching role. This serves as a great example. Think of a parent raising a child. For a parent to say “do your homework” to a child but totally leave them alone for a semester and just review their grades at the end of that semester is an entirely different qualitative experience for the child/student, than the parent who actively oversees the process of the child ‘being’ a student! The parent who helps the child with homework, interacts with the child when there are problems, issues, or frustration: the parent who engages the child fully in the process of ‘doing’ their homework, is in fact coaching/teaching and creating a qualitatively different experience for the child/student. There are vast numbers of studies that show that parents who take an active role in their children’s learning, have children who achieve higher levels of education and academic performance. Coaching in the fitness industry “should” work the same, but does not.

Indeed, what passes for coaching currently in the Fitness Industry is the wishy‐washy equivalent command of “just do your homework”. Too many coaches assign “12 week programs” with no



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active engagement of the client offered. In fact the modern internet marketer counts on this lack of interaction for earning lots of income. They offer, “try my guaranteed program” knowing full well that most consumers will not see the process through to the end. Coaches become too concerned with volume of clientele because it represents income. Clients, consumers, and potential clients suffer across the board as the industry continually reinforces this attitude of ‘just do your homework’ without any consideration for the client/student being enhanced and supported during the actual process. It’s a fundamentally and profound black hole of this industry to miss the importance of the role of ‘coach as teacher’ in regards to actively engaging and supporting clients during the client’s undertaking of the process.

Whether purposely or subtly, the industry reinforces a dictatorial attitude for assigning protocol to clients. Fitness coaches tend to talk “at” clients and talk “down to” clients. They simply fail to dialogue “with” clients. Effective coaching requires the coach to not only qualitatively engage the client during the process of diet and training; but to consciously engage the client as a student as well. For the real coach this means the client is the element of focus. And within the ‘coach as teacher’ role, the client’s physical goals are secondary to the coach enhancing the client’s qualitative experience during the process.

When the coach takes on the responsibility of support and guidance of a client’s undertaking, teaching opportunities reveal themselves more apparently. As the coach engages the client as they ‘do their homework’, client’s specific aptitudes, attitudes, strengths and weaknesses reveal themselves to the coach to capitalize on. Just as a parent would notice certain aptitudes of a child if they actively participated with the child doing their homework, the same is true of the coach in the fitness industry. Elements of individual personality will reveal themselves to the coach. He can act accordingly and more appropriately assess and evaluate how to proceed with the client/student, and at what speed, with what expectations, and with what style of communication. All of this coaching attention for a client during the process qualitatively enhances the client’s own experience. This also serves to build those areas of confidence and competence for the client; especially toward overcoming areas of weakness or doubt. The coach who merely “assigns homework” cannot possibly be this effective for the client, no matter how appropriate the diet or training may be for that client. This is where the “curriculum” far exceeds the protocol.

As the process unfolds, the good coach continues to learn more and more about the individual client. This gives the coach the added awareness to not only consider the client’s goals, but be able to look beyond those goals on the client’s behalf at the same time. And this can only come from actively engaging and interacting with the client during their application of assigned protocol: Just like good teachers and parents who actively engage students during their learning process can come to see a student’s aptitudes long before the student/child can even



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embrace them on their own. For example, many times clients hire me with an initial goal to compete in the cosmetic world of physique display. Upon their initial evaluation and assessment I often conclude that such a goal is deleterious for them; especially in the short term. So I employ the same process such a goal would require, but I implement different teaching options along the way. (Hence, the curriculum exceeds the protocol) The client ends up determining for themselves that the goal to compete is either unrealistic or not truly what they want. By engaging client aptitudes and attitudes during the undertaking, the client becomes empowered as a student to their own self‐awareness. And this is true for students in any undertaking or industry.

This kind of coaching in the teacher and student context represents teaching more than just instruction of protocol. And it need not be some concerted effort to do so. Just by consistent and aware interaction with clients, clients become their own teachers as well. Coach, as teacher then, is also a verb and not a noun. Mastery for a coach is not only regarding his own role, but instilling and teaching the student to acquire this mastery as well. The coach merely has to acknowledge that this level of teaching toward mastery takes place from where the client currently is at, and at the pace the client can currently handle. And this can only occur by engaging, instructing, and observing the client, as they ‘do their homework’. And although this level of mastery may take years; fostering this kind of coaching environment is far more efficient than a focus merely on protocol instruction and physical goals. Think about it. If there is a teacher/student element to the coaching relationship, then the reality is that having a student have the same level of understanding year after year represents failure, not success. In the real world of teaching, if a student stays in grade 6 for three years, this NOT success for a teacher no matter how loved and popular he may be. The goal for a teacher and for a coach is the same. The goal is to teach and instruct toward a student’s competence, confidence, and mastery of the material at hand.

Too often competency in the Fitness industry is measured by some sort of popularity base. This is especially true now of the modern media and internet. This may or may not be warranted but it is not a measuring stick for coaching or teaching competence. The goal is always client progression in the real sense of the term. As counter‐intuitive as this may sound, the goal for a sincere coach is to put himself out of a job with any given client. The goal is to “graduate” the client from one sense of mastery to a greater one. And while this seems counter‐intuitive to sustaining a coach’s livelihood, it is not. Learning mastery can take years. And clients who truly value this aspect of coaching will stay with a coach as long as they continue to learn and grow. This explains why even though information becomes more widely available, my own coaching business is now entering its fourth decade. And this also explains why most coaching clients I procure average a 5 year business relationship with me. So the coach who truly understands the teacher/student relationship is always one giant leap ahead of the coach or trainer who



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insists on believing that expertise is all about information gathering and domain knowledge. The real truth of the coach as teacher relationship is that coaching is a skill, and domain knowledge is merely but one component part of that skill‐set.

However, there is one piercing obstacle for the ‘coach as teacher’ role. This role is often complicated by myths, half‐truths, misinformation, and disinformation among consumers in the Fitness Industry. As Einstein once put it, unlearning is often the most essential force of learning. This is a disappointing truth especially in the modern Fitness Industry. And this truth perpetuates itself because of a mistaken focus on dogma and detail within the focus of study material. The numbing truth here is that the devil is in the details, indeed. With a more concerted study focus on methods over principles, the actual principles are getting lost in the shuffle. Once again the industry focus is upside down in terms of material and instruction. There is now a focus on indoctrination toward study material at the expense of true mastery of understanding basic principles. It is far more difficult for a student or even a wannabe teacher to learn something right, if they continually have to unlearn something wrong. And these types of mistakes are not mistakes of application; they are mistakes of information. Mistakes of application are expected. They are good and efficient learning and teaching tools. But mistakes of information are truly hard to break. We see this in the modern ‘fear of carbs’ dogma; and other training and dieting nuances that end up being misrepresented as ‘principles’ and ‘rules’ which are anything but these. Mistakes based on faulty intelligence are hard to break, especially when the dogmatic interpretation of this information becomes widely perceived as being true.

And the industry is partly to blame for this. Because the industry focuses on information as study material, nuance and context are neglected. What occurs is what we see being played out as ‘expertise’ on the internet and popular marketing strategies representing themselves as knowledge and information. In fact they are tactical. Because the industry focuses on information rather than competence, and because of the competitive on‐line nature of the internet business; information becomes re‐packaged as part of an identity emphasis for so called experts. They get the consumer/student to take their eye off the ball, so to speak, to read someone’s personal bent of information that seems important but has no integral value. The actual potential student becomes secondary to the pursuit of information. Even more egregious to this end, the coach has to spend a great deal of energy of focus for engaging a client to unlearn what they think they know to be true.

And this can of course lead to teacher/student debate as widely held beliefs become sacrosanct and defended. It is tremendously difficult to engage people that they do not know, what they “think” they know. However, within the teacher and student coaching relationship, creating an atmosphere of debate is a losing proposition for the coach, and subsequently for the



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client/student as well. The coach always needs to refocus on an attitude to ‘do’ right, even when the environment of debate steers itself to a focus on ‘being right’. In regards to information, being right is secondary to that all important element of the teacher creating an atmosphere of client engagement. If the coach does find himself in an atmosphere of having to prove himself right, even should he win the argument, the fact there was an argument at all is a loss for the coach as far as the teacher and student relationship goes. By example, recently I had to go on to a very popular web board to interact regarding one of my articles. But the environment there was overwhelmingly confrontational; not to me, but just in general. Everyone wanted to argue with each other and ‘be’ right. The environment this created was conducive to neither teaching nor learning. Once I realized this, I knew as a coach it was best to remove myself from the environment. Otherwise, my engagement in this sort of atmosphere would have delivered and contributed to the wrong message.

Engaging client compliance is not done from defensive posturing or policing tactics. If a teacher/student relationship takes on this level of interaction, it creates a sense of pressure to perform for both client and coach. Be a coach, not a cop. Situations which require a client’s unlearning still must fall within a mutually accepted and cooperative, not confrontational interaction. There is no blame to assign on either end; especially if a coach seeks to do right over a necessity of being right. Leadership, even in the context of teaching, points a direction to follow, and supplies the client with options for various corrective applications for unlearning. The coach as a teacher needs only engage willing students. But the coach also must always accept their own role as merely a catalyst for students to use and employ toward their own progression. Obviously, this has nothing to do with a coaching needing to be right in regards to the coach/client, teacher/student interaction. The effective coach needs to perceive himself as a tool for the client for moving forward. The client is not a tool for the coach’s expertise or bottom line. So to reiterate the message of this chapter: even within the context of teaching a student to unlearn what they think they know: if the coach embraces the question, “who is my client” then the process of helping them learn and achieve unfolds appropriately. When and if a coach forgets this or never even considers the question, this can bring up all kinds of scenarios for negative interaction, confrontation, and digression in the relationship etc. Coach, as teacher, is an integral element of focus for effective coaching.


• Recall an influential teacher from your own past or present. Examine what was/is so unique about this teacher that influences you in such a positive way. What qualities of character portray this teacher? For example, is it leadership? Humour? Personal attention? Story telling? What makes this teacher stand out for you is the connection



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the teacher created. Examine what you can learn from this to enhance your own teaching awareness. Make notes.

• Point: “the coach teaches clients, not material”. Think of an example of two different clients who need to learn the exact same lesson or principle. Based on the question, “who is my client?” how would you approach instruction differently for each of them. Make notes.

• Now think of two different clients with two different levels of ability who have the same goals. As a teacher, how would your “curriculum” differ for each one? Remember that ‘protocol prescription’ is only part of the ‘curriculum’. Make two columns, one for each client side by side and examine just how different this can be, point by point.

• Make notes on what the above reveals to you in regards to the statement “the curriculum exceeds the protocol”. As a teacher, what do you learn yourself, in terms of style, implementation etc?

• To be a good teacher you must first be a good student. Beyond information gathering, how could hone your own skills as a student to help you as a teacher?

• Summary: Contemplate all the above within the context of “coach as teacher”. What are your own strengths and weaknesses? How could you further develop your capacity of your role as teacher?



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Chapter 7 ‘How to’: Communicating Effectively As a Coach and

On‐line Coach

There are certain elements to coaching which are endemic regardless of industry and common to all forms of coaching. We have already explored some of these in general. However there are other aspects of effective coaching which are unique to the fitness industry in particular. And specifically, the new on‐line element for coaches in the fitness industry presents particular challenges and these must be met with relevant skills and talents when communicating with clients. The melding of the more general elements of coaching talent with the specific characteristics of the Fitness arena needs to be addressed in further detail. “How to” communicate with clients extends from common sense to specific strategies and tactics related to dictating protocol and interacting effectively with clients.

Before proceeding further, this merits another look at the “expert‐base” within the current fitness industry. Certification courses and accreditation workshops and seminars within the fitness industry are currently based on business models. The goal to generate income supersedes the time and energy available for effecting change at the grass roots level. However, this must change. The industry model is no longer marketing expertise so much, but the appearance of expertise. As accreditation continues to be married to the marketing of information, the real expertise exhibited by a talent for being able to deliver this information to the client is ignored. What we have now, industry wide, are experts competing among each other with ‘versions’ of my way vs. their way, or one methodology or another. As this market expands to the internet and real expertise continues to be confused with marketing hype, true expertise is more diluted than ever before. This is made even worse by the affiliate marketing of programs and diets now so common on the internet. The point is, because of all this confusion and hype there is more need for coaching now than ever before: and there is a wider consumer base willing to embrace it. But the easy route for marketing and accreditation is to teach the appearance of science. The truth is some coaching skills simply cannot be taught. They can be studied. They can be emulated. They can be practiced. But they cannot be taught. And either the industry knows this and chooses to ignore it, or it is simply missed under the facade that the scientific principles involved are somehow always changing.

To be an effective coach in the fitness industry and to have a sustained career is all about coaching skills, talent, and interaction. ‘How to’ communicate effectively as a coach is far more important than more and more detailed scientific information and study. To know the principles that will benefit 90% of the potential clients, 90% of the time; and then be able to coach within that framework of knowledge, is far more relevant than mere exposure to the



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ideas of one thousand internet experts. This industry currently suffers from the dogma of specialization. Remember, a specialist is ‘someone who knows more and more about less and less’. Sound effective coaching works from the opposite of this premise. It works from a communication where information is secondary to the client‐centred relationship reality.

Therefore ‘how to’ communicate for effective coaching should be the next wave of accreditation and certification in the fitness industry. These qualitative and deeper elements of coaching need to be addressed. As stated earlier, they have not yet had to be because of the high turnover rate of coaches/trainers/and consumers in the fitness industry. And to reiterate, this represents the failure of the industry and not its success.

A knowledge of ‘how to’ communicate as a coach requires a shift in thinking beyond information and knowledge to the actual interaction between coach and client. The starting point to effective communication between coach and client needs to always keep four relevant points of context in mind:

1) Address the client’s perspective and knowledge base (Answer the question ‘who is my client?’); 2) Define the issue (Answer the question of why is the client interacting with me in terms of situation and circumstance? As in the triangle of awareness); 3) Keep the subject matter in relevant context, (Answer the question, what is the central focus of this interaction?); 4) Discuss and advise in ways and means that are manageable, meaningful, and applicable for the client. (Answer the question, how do I most effectively respond to this interaction?)

As an example, I have a new client who is an overweight, busy, working mother of two young tots, and has a goal to have more energy and to lose about 30lbs of excess weight. She is confused about all the advice she reads on the internet and has worked with personal trainers with little to no success. She has questions as to what time of day she should train and what supplements she should take. She has heard she should train early in the morning and that she needs protein powder after her workouts. (keeping this reference example very general.) So my interaction in terms of how to respond is to consider my client has little understanding of the principles or the knowledge base, expressed by her stated “confusion”. In addressing the ‘who is my client’, the first goal is to not confuse her more but to initiate a sense of confidence for both the interaction and the application of prescribed protocol. Explaining a bunch of science to her does not serve that end. Next, the issue related to her question is one of minutia. To properly ‘define the issue’, my response needs to keep in mind that consistency is more important for this client in losing weight than either of these specifics she is concerned about. She is asking about the ‘physical’ not the mental or emotional. Furthermore, the central focus of the interaction is one of mistaken assumption, answering the question. The optimum time of day for this client to train is the time she can do so regularly because of her schedule: Thus, addressing ‘keeping the subject matter in relevant context’. There is no ‘optimum’ time in her



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case. What is optimum for her is what is realistic for her. So once I engage her for information regarding the structure of her day as well as her current eating regimen, I make recommendations for a window of time to train so that training can be regular, consistent, and manageable and get her to confirm and sign off on that. I explain to her the relevance of supplements and that for her, the protein powder is less an issue than a good multi vitamin and a whole food approach to wellness. This is not a competitor I am dealing with. I give her some choices as to post‐ workout foods that are easy and convenient and serve her particular needs. Therefore, my interaction ‘discusses and advises in ways and means that are manageable, meaningful, and applicable’.

Of course I used a very simple one‐dimensional example above. But ‘how to’ communicate effective coaching is all about addressing these four points until it becomes habitual, natural, and automatic for the coach, regardless of the client. And these four points become even more imperative with more problematic clientele.

The example above is simple to illustrate the application of the 4 points of ‘how to’ communicate effectively with any client. The coach provides the initial accurate information, guidance and structure regarding protocol application (i.e. diet and training). The coach keeps in mind the client’s physical goals while also nudging and hinting and instructing as to the coach’s expectations for the client while moving forward in the process. The job within the job for coach lies here. To be clear, that job is to establish an environment of interaction for the progressive development of the coach/client relationship as the process unfolds. Within this context the coach must take care of specific priorities to make that happen. These priorities for interaction are as follows: 1) The coaching must be personal; 2) The coaching must be practical and purposeful; 3) The coaching must be professional; and 4) the coaching must be proactive. It would be a good idea for any coach to post these 4 points somewhere visible for a quick reference check to employ as a check list when interacting with clients. All 4 of these points may often be either mutually inclusive or mutually exclusive or weigh heavily toward one point over another. But within these 4 points of relevance lies the key to enhancing the progression of the coach and client relationship. And any good coach seeking to truly help a client reach their goals, first seeks to establish such a productive coaching environment.

Upon examining these points, a common question often emerges: ‘How can the coaching be personal and professional at the same time?’ First of all, effective coaching must always be personal because a coach coaches people, not programs. The effective coach instructs, guides, and influences individuals on a one to one basis. Therefore, the whole element of the relationship should be personal to be effective. Otherwise, it’s a mere regression to the fall back position of the industry to be a “trainer” and slot people into programs and diets, and institute a one size fits all approach to interaction. As previously discussed, real coaching is well



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beyond this one dimensional approach and application. True coaching must be personal because it is individually based and client‐centered. This is one difference in the Fitness Industry from say, the corporate world or Team approach in professional and amateur athletics. And because coaching is client‐centred and not protocol based, it tends beyond the physical realm. The coaching must be personal because it is interactive, and each client will be unique to what elements of protocol need most attention, as well as what style of communication best suits this client. All these elements and more dictate ‘how’ coaching must be personal.

However, the coaching is always professional when the communication of the coach is always properly focused on the client process and development. When the coach embraces and internalizes the job to be guiding light, mirror, instructor, and compass; then the coach will always be professional within a personal application and interaction. The coach embraces that he is the authority figure in the relationship. The nature of the relationship implies the coach possesses a higher level of knowledge or competence than the client. But it is not a power‐relationship like a boss/employer. The coach in the Fitness Industry is employed by the client. The client is the actual ‘boss’ even though the coach is the leader and authority figure in the relationship. The coach works ‘for’ the client, not the other way around.

The ‘service’ nature of the relationship means the coach understands a level of responsibility to the client. This is a common mistake made by coaches in the Fitness Industry. The coach is the authority figure in regards to the client’s fitness goals. The coach is not better, smarter, or more important than the client. Acknowledging this level of service within the authority of the coaching relationship is another way to insure the coaching always maintains a level of professionalism.

Keeping the service nature of the relationship in mind is helpful for establishing a professional level of decorum as well. The attitude of the coach should always be something akin to “what can I do for you?” or “How can I help you?” This attitude keeps the coach properly focused on his actual role in providing a “service” to clients. And within this element of service and the professionalism it demands, all coaching interaction necessitates a mutually understood set of ground rules.

Clients are not friends and they are not family. A coach needs to communicate accordingly. A good coach is capable of sympathizing and empathizing with a client and his circumstances; but a good coach is never involved in a client’s personal affairs. This line is crossed all too often in the fitness industry, especially among coaches and clients in the competitive arena (Bodybuilding and Figure). Too many coaches seek to be a client’s personal hero. Whenever any aspect of the coaching relationship becomes about the coach’s ego instead of the client’s progression, more is lost than gained. It is a classic mistake of coaches in the Fitness Industry. An effective and worthy coach stays uninvolved and unattached to a client’s personal life.



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Communication and interaction from this understood level of professional decorum is the responsibility of the coach. Over time, remaining unattached to a client’s personal circumstances establishes a deep level of respect for the ongoing relationship. Purposeful communication and interaction is easier to facilitate from this established level of professionalism. Once the coach’s ego is effectively removed from the equation, the purpose of any interaction is easier to find and maintain. There should be a purpose behind all client feedback and interaction. Effective coaching is all about communication of both meaning and message. Being client‐centred, instead of ego‐centred ensures a good coach stays focused on the topic at hand during communication. Communicating both message and meaning requires the coach to be clear and concise. Communication needs to stay on point, and be as brief as possible while still being explanatory and providing valuable feedback. The “purposeful” part of communication is the benefit for the client, not the coach. Again the parent/child example comes to mind in terms of “purpose”. No good parent approaches communicating message and meaning with their child from their own standpoint of selfish purpose. And this becomes automatic. Great coaches also should develop the same automatic sense of purpose of interaction with clients as well, albeit without the emotional attachments.

Part of the coach’s skill and tactic toward communication, interaction, and feedback then is “unattached sincerity”. There is far too much scientific and personal phoniness within the coaching arena of the modern Fitness Industry. Setting the tone of the ground rules mentioned above should always have honesty and sincerity as first priorities. Part of true honesty for any coach is to just be who they are when dealing with client interaction and feedback. There is no need for pretention. The most effective leaders, teachers, and coaches are the ones who are just being themselves in the leadership environment. There is no better and more efficient way to model appropriate feedback than by being real and sincere. The coach sets the tone for this from the beginning. The effective coach communicates clearly; says what he means, means what he says, and does so sincerely and honestly from his own style of coaching. Yes, a coach needs to understand the client, from the client’s perspective. But the best and most effective mode of interaction and communication for the coach is to relate from his own real and honest personality and communication structure. We will discuss this further in later chapters. By example, imagine a situation like we have in professional sports. Professional coaches are usually at least two to three decades older than their athletes. Imagine an NFL, NHL, or NBA coach trying to talk with his players by employing their own urban speak and vogue levels of discourse or popular slang. Being pretentious this way is easy to see through, and it creates an air of charade which is never a strong base for positive and meaningful interaction. Words should be well‐chosen by coaches to create bridges, not barriers. We see the ‘charade’ of communication also in the industry by those who hide behind pseudo‐science. Effective coaches need not communicate in industry or scientific jargon either. A good coach does not ‘use five dollar words when a ten cent phrase will suffice’. This is the other side of ineffective



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coaching in the Fitness Industry where coaches clearly do not even understand their actual role; let alone can they embrace just being themselves within it. Being purposeful within client communication means focusing on substance; not on style or form. As much as effective communication is in knowing and understanding your client; it is just as imperative to develop interaction in a manner that develops the client’s understanding of you, as coach, as well. This is not served by ‘acting’ as someone you are not; whether that is represented by trying to communicate in ‘industry speak’ nor by trying to fit into modern ‘styles’ of slang.

So while effective communication is personal, the professional emphasis prevents the personal attention from becoming interpersonal stimulation. Although coaching is personal, effective coaching avoids any and all “just between you and me” type of interaction or innuendo. Again, this type of interaction serves no purpose and effective ‘how to’ coaching is all about purposeful communication for the benefit of the client.

And even though a coach should communicate and interact in a natural style, he should always evaluate feedback before offering it. This is especially true of internet non face to face interaction. As I do myself, I advise all on‐line coaches to digest on‐line correspondence at least twice before responding. More often than not, and especially when communicating on‐line or long distance, effective feedback should be ‘prepared’. A coach who ‘reacts’ to client feedback or interaction can miss a lot of pertinent information or opportunity for teaching and instruction. Again, one of the focused elements of ‘how to’ communicate with clients, is that the interaction must be ‘proactive’. (Not reactive.) A coach who reacts to client feedback is not being “unattached”. When deciding how to respond to a client communication, being proactive means, as a coach, you are not trying to prove a point to a client, so much as leading the way. The difference may be a matter of nuance.

But nuance in communication and interaction is a particularly advanced coaching communication skill. The coach sets a tone from the beginning of the relationship that, whether his feedback is considered positive, negative, instructional or advisory, the feedback is always for the benefit of the client; hence it is proactive in intent. If the client understands from early in the coaching relationship that coaching is always meant to be purposeful and proactive, he is more likely to embrace even the most difficult criticism. The mandate of effective coaching is to always be able to communicate feedback the client ‘needs to’ embrace; not the easy road of what the client may ‘want to hear’. For instance, I will often get clients who are uninitiated to the relevant scope of commitment and discipline involved in reaching a cosmetic fitness goal. Excited clients will often report in that they have “stuck to their diet and training for almost a whole week now”. From their perspective, this may indeed seem like a worthy accomplishment. But a coach who rewards what should be expected behaviour is not being sincerely proactive in his interaction. From the beginning, it is a coach’s responsibility to



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prepare a client to be able to assimilate coach’s feedback without intimidation, fear, or judgment. Simply, the coach must lead the client to understand that the coach communicates what needs to be stated: nothing more, nothing less. This can often entail words of encouragement for a job well‐done, but it can also entail advisement, that the client application is incomplete or not good enough. If the client is properly prepared as to the ongoing nature of interaction, then all coaching communication will be received with similar impact. Effective, proactive communication is about properly preparing a client for the most effective way of getting them to be able to deal with all forms of relevant communication from the coach. The coach’s goal for communication is to create an interactive environment of momentum and results in process; not an environment that coddles and entertains excuses. But the coach must also acknowledge this will not be a linear process. This is ‘how to’ communicate effectively. To reiterate, proactive communication doesn’t just happen. The effective coach ‘prepares’ a client as to how the ongoing interaction may take place. This is much akin to how a teacher would set up his style of teaching early in the school year, so that the teacher and student ‘understand’ how the appropriate process of interaction will unfold.

Toward the end of establishing an ongoing positive interaction experience, the coach needs to encourage open‐ended correspondence. It is far more important, especially over time, for the coach and client to establish an understanding of their mutual interaction; rather than mere literal interpretations. Effective communication will seldom be one‐dimensional, even when seemingly so, as in on‐line written interaction. This means that a good coach encourages a client to be expressive. Open‐ended communication and interaction requires choosing words more carefully to be sure. Again, the purpose is to be understood, more so than literally interpreted. This is most important when a coach knows his feedback will have some sort of emotional impact, whether praise or critique. To encourage open‐ended communication requires the coach to invite the same. For instance, there is a difference in the level of interpretation for the following coaching interaction: Asking a client, “do you like the diet I gave you?” is a close‐ended question that dangerously invites opinion and evaluation from the client. It also has a limited response variance, as in yes or no etc. And the client’s opinion of whether or not he likes the diet may have little to do with the necessity of the implementation of the diet. So the structure of correspondence is important. A better way to elicit open ended perspective from the client would be to pose the question this way; “how is the diet going that you are on?” This question allows for more possibilities for the client to expand and explain the diet application in many modes; level of compliance, degree of difficulty, hunger and appetite, etc. What the question doesn’t do is invite the client to comment on an evaluation of the actual diet protocol. An even better way to pose the question would be for the coach to inject himself into the process. So the question would now be more like, “tell me more about the diet process we are undertaking?” This leaves the question open‐ended for more sincere and honest client



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response. And by the coach posing the question this way, the client assumes a greater level of the coach’s involvement as well as the coach’s desire to explore the answer.

Having explored in a very general sense the idea of ‘how to’ communicate effectively as a coach in the on‐line Fitness arena does not mean all coaching relationships will work. Even with sustained efforts there will be clients and coaches who are just not a ‘good fit’ for each other. We see this example in professional sports all the time. There have been numerous examples where a player on one team is disgruntled and his ‘performance’ was less than it could be. He was not a ‘good fit’ for the organization. Yet, when the player moves to another team he fits right in and his performance improves substantially. I have been fortunate enough to be involved in formulating questions for evaluation of players entering the professional draft. Teams spend a great deal of time and energy in the interview process even after having scouted a player’s talent for months, or maybe even years. How is this relevant? Well the interview process has the organization assessing and evaluating how a player may or may not fit their system or be able to handle the organization’s coaching and management style. “Chemistry” is an important word in assessing professional talent beyond physical skills.

The same exists with on‐line coaching. I myself, have an open‐ended style based on biofeedback and qualitative interaction. Many who come to me from a deep influence of internet expertise often have a difficult time relating to such open‐ended emphasis where shades of grey are more emphasized than a black and white application and analysis. More often than not, by being proactive and preparing clients to how the process unfolds, this can be overcome. But sometime it may not. Many clients will look for answers where answers do not exist in this industry; only perspective does. While the coach has to make relevant who the client is and what the client’s perspective may be; the coach also must maintain his own style and emphasis of ‘how to’ communicate and interact during the coaching process. The wider a coach’s perspective and exposure can be, the more likely he will be able to assimilate and communicate and interact effectively with a wide variety client base. To this end, we’ll explore ‘how to’ interact and communicate more effectively in the next chapter.


• Within the industry’s current emphasis on ‘information’ or the ‘appearance of knowledge’ how does the definition of ‘specialist’ help you to reframe your perspective in terms of ‘how to’ effectively communicate as a coach?

• Use Scott’s 4 points of relevant communication and address this scenario. Joe, a personal trainer signs on with you. He admits he seems to be able to help others



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accomplish goals, but not himself. His goal is to be a Fitness model and appear in magazines or at least look like he could do so. He is 5 ft 10 inches; 25 years old, and looks like he has never been in a gym in his life. He is heavily influenced by on‐line websites for his information and knowledge. He can train 3‐4 days per week. He works 10‐12 hours per day, and ‘eats on the run.’ He wants to know what you can do for him in regards to his goals. Use the 4 pts of effective communication to answer the information presented to you. Write it, like an actual email to “Joe”.

• Using the above scenario, examine the manner of communication and how you make it personal and yet professional at the same time.

• Examine how you interpret the term “purposeful client communication”. How does this influence your style of “how to” communicate with clients.

• What does being proactive and not reactive mean to you for communicating as a coach?

• Discuss the responsibility of the coach to ‘prepare the client for purposeful feedback’. Examine how an emphasis on information may fail to do this. Examine what this means for you in terms of ‘how to’ better communicate message and meaning with clients.

• Think of a Fitness goal you had say 5 years ago. Instruct yourself in a written communication as to how to accomplish it. This exercise should help reveal to you your own style for effective communication as well as ‘how to’ communicate from your own perspective. This is a strength; not a weakness.



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Chapter 8 Strategies and Tactics for Communicating Coaching Instruction

Many coaches reading this do not realize that they are currently little more than advanced exercise instructors. Real coaching and the consideration of the ‘triangle of awareness’ necessitates developing communication skills far beyond mere instruction. And even within the realm of instruction, many coaches are limited because they do not understand this fundamental coaching prerequisite. Many wannabe coaches are limited, not because they lack a working knowledge of the subject matter, but because they cannot deliver it in a helpful and meaningful way to the client. Once again, I point to dozens of ‘qualified’ instructors who no longer are able to earn a living in the Fitness Industry. I have known many whose walls are lined with one certification after another framed on their walls. Many lacked neither knowledge nor official qualifications. Yet they are now no longer in the industry after investing thousands of dollars and a number of labour intensive years becoming certified and qualified as a fitness professional. As I will state often, I see this as a failure of the industry that falsely weighs information at the expense of the talent involved in being able to deliver and apply it.

As the last chapter outlined a thinking process for ‘how to’ communicate and interact with clients, this chapter will illustrate some widely known strategies and tactics for delivering instruction, changing behaviour and engaging clients to be actively involved in their own process of goal acquisition. This chapter gives the wannabe coach some tactics to use and apply when engaging client instruction and advice. Although many coaching books employ variations of these tactics and strategies under different names; I prefer the categories set out by Marshall Cook, in Effective Coaching, 1999. So the strategies and tactics discussed below are taken directly from the related chapter in his book. To my mind, almost all effective coaching communication for instruction can be broken down to one of these 7 elements below. And these tactics need not be mutually exclusive. A single correspondence with a client may necessitate using one or more of these tactics for instructional purposes when engaging a coaching client. The 7 categories for effective coaching communication and interaction for instruction are as follows: 1) factual, 2) explanatory, 3) justifying, 4) leading, 5) Hypothetical, 6) Alternative choices, 7) Summarizing.

1) Factual

In the fitness industry fact and opinion are exchanged as being the same on a frequent basis. This is yet another of the limitations of an industry which continues to foster the dogma of ‘information = knowledge’. As the industry continues to certify and ‘qualify’ individuals with minimal study, the line between opinion and fact is continually blurred. Within a coaching



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context this can be particularly problematic. For a coach, arguing with clients regarding opinions represented as facts is a waste of time and energy. And it can also lead to disrupting an effective authority‐based communication style within the relationship. What is important for the coach to keep in mind is the truth that facts can be verified while opinions cannot. For ‘certified’ trainers (instead of qualified coaches) not being able to distinguish between the two can present ongoing difficulties within the coach/client relationship.

I’ll use an example of common feedback I receive from clients. There is a qualitative difference between a clients reporting a ‘fact’ from his training vs. an opinion drawn based on this fact. For instance, a client may report an overall drop in strength during his current program undertaking. This may be a fact that is verifiable. However, this does not lead to a fact regarding a program’s effectiveness. For a client to report, “my strength has decreased on this program” is a measureable and observable fact. However, to conclude “therefore, this program is not working for me” is merely an opinion based on this fact. This opinion requires evaluation from the qualified coach. Many times factual indicators lead clients to draw conclusions that are not true, misleading, and unsubstantiated. Worse yet, coaches also often make the same mistakes as well, replacing opinion with fact. To be able to offer effective instruction, a coach must be able to differentiate between the two. The coach needs to be clear. If you want factual feedback, then you need to ask factual questions. (Questions that are verifiable.) For instance, asking a client, ‘how long are your workouts taking you’ is a question which elicits factual and verifiable information. Confusing opinion and fact within assessing and evaluating client feedback is a coach killer. A good coach makes clear in his mind the difference between fact, and relevant opinion. This is true of both parts of the two‐way interactive nature of the coach/client relationship.

2) Explanatory

It is very helpful for clients if coaching instruction also has some kind of explanatory element to it. This is especially true of advising a client based on their biofeedback. I will often receive a question posed to me this way regarding feedback: “Is this normal?” Specific client feedback can often lead to this type of assessment question. In fact, the question is irrelevant. There is no normal or abnormal, there is only general and specific. If we address the example used above where the client reports my ‘strength has decreased on this program’, the coach’s explanatory feedback based on this serves as a great tool to use to not only build client competence and confidence but to explain to them the wider purpose beyond the reported ‘fact’’ For instance, my explanatory response to this client’s feedback of decreased strength would be something akin to the following: “Because you have never done this kind of volume of training before, it is not surprising that your lifting loads have decreased. However, this



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program is not designed to increase load strength; it is designed to develop your physique. How much you are lifting is relatively unimportant at this point.”

The coaching instruction employed ‘explains’ to a client his biofeedback in a relevant and important context. And the explanation serves the client in further understanding the rationale for the program implementation. Note that the instruction and explanatory feedback offered here is aimed at the client’s understanding, and not some scientific rationale. Explanatory feedback once again must consider coaching the client, not the program. One of the most common mistakes coaches make when trying to communicate explanatory instruction, is that they reduce instruction to some scientific jargon of program design rather than using the interaction as an opportunity to employ explanatory feedback to further engage the client in the motivation of application of protocol. By effectively arming the client with explanatory instruction, the client has a better understanding for utilizing and engaging the protocol with more confidence in the process. Explanatory feedback should be aimed at serving the client within the application of the process. It should not serve as a mere ‘defence’ for the prescription of protocol.

3) Justifying

The justifying tactic can be a two‐edged sword. On the one hand it can be a viable backbone of the explanatory tactic used above. On the other hand it can sometimes be reduced to nothing more than an advanced rationalization. “Because I said so”, is a type of quick but ineffective ‘justifying’ when engaging instruction or advice. It is incomplete and power‐oriented. However, as a backbone for tactical interaction with clients, sometimes ‘justifying’ is imperative, even if a little too black and white and absolute. Justifying can be used appropriately when a coach can effectively choose words that are less provocative and more explanatory in purpose. Justifying tactics should not be confused with ‘negotiating’. Negotiating instruction with clients is a losing proposition for coaches. Instruction and advice may sometimes require ‘justifying’ so the client can either rethink a commonly held belief, or the client can reset his confidence in the coach.

By example, I often have female new clients who balk at me including ‘carbs’ in their diets. It becomes an emotional issue for them beyond rationality. By employing the triangle of awareness, I have to meet them at the emotional level as well. This can sometimes entail a justifying engagement of feedback on my part. It may look something like this: “You hired me for my expertise. My expertise tells me to tell you that your fear of carbs is unfounded. My expertise also tells me that if your carb‐free diet was actually working long term, then you wouldn’t need me to find a diet solution for you.” So, the nature of the feedback here is not ‘explanatory’ in terms of why she has carbs in her diet. Instead the explanatory nature of the



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communication is a subtext. Instead, what I am really doing in this interaction is ‘justifying’ my expertise. The reason this may be a necessary tactic for advice is that sometimes ‘doubt’ is created in a client’s headspace which has nothing to do with ‘facts’. In such a case ‘explanatory’ tactical communication can often fall on deaf ears. Although justifying may be an absolute, it can often be a necessity of tactical interaction. If used too often however, it can represent a coaching insecurity.

4) Leading

The element of leading in the instruction of a client is not about leadership per se. The tactic of ‘leading’ is a more general approach and strategy to effective client interaction and instruction. In legal parlance, often we hear lawyers object on the grounds of ‘leading the witness’. And while this may be a no‐no in legal cases, leading a client as a tactic and strategy for coaching interaction is very effective. The goal for the strategy of leading is to not only engage the client in their ownership of protocol application, but also to further deepen the coach/client relationship and interaction potential. Leading is all about creating what I like to call the ‘arrowhead of awareness’ for the client. An arrowhead points a specific direction and has two sides with straight lines which create and embrace the desired direction. The strategy of leading a client in terms of advisement and instruction, serves as a means to nudge them in the direction toward their own consistency of application of protocol. It negates potential outside interference and confusion as well. The tactics mentioned above can be used in this overall strategy of leading clients in creating their own arrowhead of direction and purpose. Leading can either be a direct situational tactic of instruction, or it can be an overall strategy of effective coaching interaction as well. Other tactics of communication and instruction will show an overall strategy of leading a client within interaction and advisement.

5) Hypothetical

Hypothetical examples and situations are fantastic communication and interactive tactics. I use hypothetical examples all the time when trying to engage clients. And some hypothetical examples are actually real world examples. They are only hypothetical to the client. Often a hypothetical example is really just the coach engaging the client to look further down the road. Engaging a specific path has both results and consequences. Most enthusiastic people will focus on ‘results’ and choose to look away from the consequences. A good coach will weigh the cost/benefit of the specific path any client may be taking and then employ a hypothetical situation to illustrate the foreseeable consequences. Once again, the tactic of a hypothetical example serves the overall strategy of ‘leading’ mentioned above. In the case of negative



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consequences, hypothetical situations merely point to the reality of a situation in more clear terms. It’s the old adage of pointing out, that “if you always do, what you’ve always done, then you will always get what you’ve always got.” Insanity is repeating the same behaviour and expecting a different result. Clichés aside, often clients are blind to the creation of their own negative consequences to selected behavioural paths.

By example, each year I get many female Figure competitors suffering from metabolic burnout or metabolic damage. They employ me to help remedy the situation, yet the first goal they have is that, “I still want to compete”. Even though several competitions have resulted in further and further off‐season weight gain, they choose to remain blind that their competition diet and training strategy has been the real contributor to their undesired weight gain. Employing hypothetical situations and consequences which can ‘futurize’ the expected consequences can go a long way to ‘leading’ clients from repeating the same mistakes again, by choosing instead, not to compete. (Choosing a different path.)

Think of the tactic of employing hypothetical situations as mini story telling. Most effective coaches in the professional sports industry use hypothetical situations as a means of getting their players to prognosticate current strategy to desired ends or consequences of actions. Many coaches also use past experience as a real‐world example of employing hypothetical situations to lead their athletes toward desired results, and away from undesired consequences. Mini story telling in the form of presenting hypothetical situations is one of the greatest instructional interactive tactics a coach can use. I recently heard one professional coach put it this way: “Tell someone a fact and they will learn it. Tell someone the truth and they will believe it. But tell someone both in the context of a story, and they will remember it forever!” The tactic of the hypothetical mini story telling model of instruction has potential profound impact for clients who truly desire results and who actively embrace coaching.

Hypothetical examples are great tactics to employ to get clients to think in different terms than they are used to. And the tactic of the hypothetical example also allows for the coach to remain unattached to what may otherwise be sensitive interaction. The hypothetical tactic tends to objectify the interaction in a manner that reduces potential negative or defensive reactions in the client as well. Whenever possible in employing the tactic of the hypothetical, I like to use a client’s own words or scenario within the actual example.

6) Alternative Choices

As discussed, the main emphasis for the coach vs. a trainer is the ongoing nature of the process. Situations and circumstances change. People’s attitudes and emotions are also influenced by their every day environment and real life outside the gym and away from the



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dinner table. Situations and circumstances arise that may dictate a change in protocol or an alternative to current protocol. The coach considers also the triangle of awareness in client interaction. Sometimes mental, emotional, or attitudinal adjustments need to be suggested in terms of alternate choices for thought or behaviour. Suggesting alternative choices is easy on the physical front. For example, if a client develops pain in the shoulder girdle from doing overhead presses, it’s easy enough for a coach to remove these movements from the program and introduce some rehab or prehab work for the area.

But this is much trickier when considering the mental and emotional elements of coaching people and not programs, which is what effective coaching is all about. Attitude adjustment or change can be a difficult and tricky area for coaching interaction. I often get clients with various food addictions and eating disorders etc, as well as many clients with some early degree of these. Clearly assigning a ‘diet’ will not remedy the issue. In fact another diet may just trigger the unwanted behaviours and thought patterns. Advising someone ‘how to think’ can be very problematic. However, reflecting back on to them that their current thinking patterns are faulty or destructive can serve as a reasonable segue to affecting necessary change. Forcing opinions on clients usually only heightens their defensiveness. The better tactic for communication is to nudge clients toward coming to their own conclusions about negative or destructive habits and behaviours. Providing alternative choices for clients must be communicated in the form of ‘suggestions’ and not dictation. Once again, the talent for nuance is imperative in the more difficult cases. The client should always be involved, or at least perceive that they are, when making and choosing alternatives to current circumstances or behaviours.

One of the most effective tactics for accomplishing this is to put the onus and ownership and responsibility back on the client where it rightfully belongs. The old Dr. Phil line, “how’s that workin for ya?” can be a useful introduction for getting a client to truly examine, rather than rationalize, how and why certain thought patterns and emotional cues may be destructive to their own goals. It’s a beginning toward a mutual approach to suggesting alternative choices for client consideration. To engage anyone to rethink or readjust current thinking patterns only works in a cooperative interactive communication environment. Any interactive situation which instead suggests, my way vs. your way, when it comes to alternative thinking strategies only invites more problems than it solves.

Suggesting alternative choices means the implementation is up to the client. This is why it is so important for the coach to make suggestions and not dictate imperatives or solutions. If the coach merely gives alternatives as solutions each time a problem presents itself, the client is never challenged to change their own destructive or faulty thinking patterns and behaviours. A good coach is capable of presenting options but the coach also knows these options are limited within the coach’s realm of advice. Advice for alternative options is useless if the client is



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never going to embrace or implement the suggested options. Helping a client to continue to grow and progress within the coaching environment means engaging the client to be an active participant in finding their own solutions. Once again, the coach is a catalyst in the process. The coach is not ‘the answer’. The good coach always keeps in mind that the client’s process is more important than the actual goal. The goal is secondary to the awareness gained within the process of securing it. Unfortunately the trainer mentality reinforced by the industry concentrates on physical goals at the expense of any true awareness during the process of achieving them. This is why after so many years in the Fitness Industry; most consumers are still out there trying to find the right training and right diet program to fit their goals. Yet, their pursuit actually illustrates a lack of developed awareness within their own process for doing so. This is why the coaching presence is so important. It gets the client to actively engage and learn during their process of the application of assigned protocol. Engaging the client to be a part of their own journey to uncovering alternative choices is another major difference between a coach and a trainer. To prod the client to actively seek their own solutions within present alternatives is an interactive communication tactic beyond a dictation of diet and program. It takes work. This work is all about communication. In regards to presenting alternative choices to a client regarding changing negative situations or circumstances, the initial question, “how’s that workin for ya?” can lead them to connect the dots of their own creation of negative situations. During interaction if a coach can ‘lead’ a client this way and also employ the client’s own words in the interaction as well as present a hypothetical situation by example, the client is more likely to be willing to embrace any suggestions for alternative choices. What is important is that the decision and action is one the client makes, not something a coach merely dictates.

7) Summarizing:

Often a client may interact with a coach in a myriad of ways reflecting all the elements of the triangle of awareness. A client may check in with the biofeedback from training protocol, but also share personal emotional issues or struggles as well. There may be added in some mental stressors to the feedback. This kind of trust in a coach should not be ignored. Too many coaches just can’t be bothered with this extra feedback. This is coaching laziness. Life happens. To ignore this kind of feedback is to imply it is irrelevant. A good coach can differentiate between excuses, rationalization, and real life circumstances that necessitate commentary. And a client may lack effective communication skills themselves. This is a coaching problem for interaction, not a client problem.

For instance, some clients may report and communicate with long text that seem scattered and disconnected. It can be a great help for the coach to merely, simply, and skilfully just reiterate



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back to the client, what they just reported. It is the coach’s responsibility to rephrase and categorize thoughts and ideas from the client into a coherent whole. The tactic to do so can be as simple as just stating back to the client, “So what you seem to be saying is...” or even better, “Overall, what I gather from your feedback is the following...” More often than not, just summarizing a client communication and presenting it back to them can serve as a means for clarity for the client, the coach, and more importantly the shared interactive process. This can help the client make connections to the meaning he was trying to convey. As well, it expresses to the client that the coach is actively engaged and takes the client’s communication seriously. This also further develops the coach/client relationship on a deeper level.

Unfortunately, too many coaches are ill‐equipped to deal with such feedback so they leave it alone. Instead, these types of coaches who focus only in the physical realm dismiss these types of relevant feedback. More often than not these types of coaches do a mental summary of such communication. But because they are ill‐equipped to deal with it, they usually summate their own conclusions along the lines of “Wow, Joe is really scattered” or “what am I supposed to say to that?” By negating the feedback of the client this way, this kind of coach violates some the prescripts of ‘how to’ interact addressed in the previous chapter. Coaching communication should be purposeful and proactive. The good coach is focused on the client and the awareness of the interaction at hand. A summary of dialogue is a simple but often ignored tactic for effective coaching communication strategy. Usually this is a mistake of context that coaches make. Coaches too often perceive their role as providing the answers to client communication and dialogue. But if the coach is properly focused on the client and the process, then ‘answers’ are provided in the role of coach being a catalyst for the client to engage more and greater accountability and responsibility in the coaching relationship. The coach is not ‘the answer’. He is only part of it.

The idea of summarizing client communication as a strategy for interaction also serves elements of ‘how to’ communicate discussed in the previous chapter. Summarizing a client’s communication is a great way to consider a response beforehand. This leads to more purposeful and proactive communication from the coach. It leads to proper interactive preparation. It leads away from the tendency of re‐action from the coach. Summarizing client communication helps the coach on a continual basis to answer that question, ‘who is my client?’ It helps the coach to consider how the client thinks, how they process information, what kind of life stressors are affecting them etc. Summarizing client communication takes the coach well beyond the mere consideration of what physical protocol a client is undertaking. As a communication strategy, summarizing also helps the coach define the relevant context of the communication. And in so doing, the summary strategy leads the coach to more effectively be able to deliver message and meaning to the client. The strategy and tactic of summarizing client communication is especially effective for new coaches.



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The tactics and strategies for effective coaching communication are for serious coaches. With all the above tactics and strategies for coaching, it can be an exhausting reality that engaging client interaction this way can create even more demand for communication and interaction with clients. This type of qualitative interaction can engage clients in a way which leads to more questions than answers. A great coach understands the engagement involved in this process. It is qualitatively distinct and deeper than the mere ‘trainer mentality’ of most coaches and experts in the fitness industry. It should not surprise a coach if his engagement of qualitative interaction brings more dialogue and questions in response. This is a good sign actually. It indicates the client is paying attention and taking coaching feedback seriously.

Coaching communication and interaction is all about engaging the client and leading them to the means to seek and find their own solutions to workable issues. Engaging and entertaining the client during this process also serves to inform the coach with everything he needs to know to guide the client moving forward. It’s a mutually profitable and purposeful engagement. This is the most productive mode for effective coaching. This style of communication may often seem counter‐intuitive to clients. They assume they hire the coach to give them the answers. In truth, the coach merely assigns protocol and serves as a guide and mirror along the way. But when a coach can unveil a client’s working aptitudes and attitudes during the application of process, this serves the client in being able to handle and absorb more in the long term process of coaching. Moreover, engaging the client with effective interaction also serves the grander purpose of building client confidence and competence moving forward as well. And this is true in terms of the client’s own goals as well as the competence and confidence within the coaching relationship. To engage the client to forge the resolve to solve their own issues and clearly being there for them during that process expresses respect for the client. It also expresses an engagement in the two‐way communication process for building the client from where they are. This is far more effective than just handing them answers to every perceived dilemma. The coach wins short term and long term by ‘inviting’ client interaction. Perceiving client interaction as a burden negates the actual purpose of a coach. One‐way styles of communication and dictation of coach to client are more appropriate for the trainer mentality.

The tactics and strategies for effective qualitative coaching are all about receiving useful information from your client and about your client. This is why the central element of focus for real coaching is that it is client‐centred. This kind of open‐ended exchange builds rapport with the client as well. And this type of rapport leads to trust which is so essential for ongoing coaching effectiveness and impact. The focus for interaction is not only an exchange of information, but proper and purposeful instruction as well. And this instruction is client‐centred, not protocol based.



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However, when a client is seeking answers in the form of information which they could easily access themselves, then the coach should instruct them to do so. Often clients will write me to ask me how many calories are in this or that food item. I do not answer such questions. However, I will lead them to where they can do so for themselves. Purposeful instruction for a coach should know the difference between showing off knowledge and leading a client to finding their own answers when situations allow. This, once again, illustrated the difference between the trainer and the coach. And this distinction is reflective also of the old adage, “catch a man a fish and he eats for a day, teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime”. The good coach knows the difference in instruction and communication. And the most effective coaches also know that engaging client interaction is the most effective means for coaches themselves to learn. Teaching and instruction on an individual basis by engaging client interaction is the most viable hands‐on form of learning a coach can be involved in. These strategies and tactics for communication are some of the best tools to employ toward this end.


• Early in the chapter the phrase ‘effective coaching for communication of instruction’ is used. What does it mean? How would it vary from client to client?

• Real World Example 1: A potential new client writes to inquire about your services. This is the communication provided: “Hi, my name is Joe Smith. I’ve been training for about 5 years now. My goal is to look like I could compete someday. I am 26 yrs old, 5 ft 9, and 170 lbs. I am currently training my whole body 3 days per week and I run on the weekends. I have been eating exactly right, and only having carbs before and after my workouts. But I have that skinny‐fat look. I would like to gain about 15 lbs of muscle and get down to about 8% body fat. What could you do for me?” Answer the above scenario for a potential new client. In your response, address as many of the tactics and strategies mentioned above. How does it help inform and elevate your level of communication? Where are you strong? Where are you weak? How do respond differently as a coach instead of a trainer. Make a list.

• Real World Example 2: Jane Smith has been a client of yours now for 18 months. She has been inconsistent with her assigned diet and training from the beginning. She sometimes goes long periods without any relevant contact at all. She is 34 yrs old, 5 ft 2, and 135 lbs with about 20% body fat. It’s the day after New Years. She writes: “Hey, Happy New Year. I’ve made a decision over the holidays. I was either going to give this up and try a 10k



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race or I was going to get really serious. I’ve decided to compete in a Figure contest. I’ve put on about 10 lbs over the holidays, but I’m finally serious about getting in shape. I know if I am going to get on stage where people will see me in a bikini, then I will have to stick to everything you give me. So, I’m ready to go! I want to compete in April. Where do we start? I’ve been searching on‐line for how to train for a competition, since I’ve never even seen one before. I’m so excited to hear back from you.” Again, answer the above communication from this client using as many of the strategies and tactics for effective coaching as you can. As you answer, what is your impression? What is the goal of your communication? What is the message and meaning you want to get across? How do the tactics and strategies help you to do so?



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Chapter 9 Developing Coaching Communication Skills and Awareness

Chapter 8 addressed actual strategies and tactics for effective coaching communication. But such strategies and tactics necessitate developing keen awareness and skilled communication for knowing when and how to employ them. All the domain knowledge in the world is useless if a coach cannot effectively communicate and impart this knowledge to a willing client. For many coaches, just like teachers and leaders, this communication skill and awareness seems to come naturally. For many others it is what separates adequate expertise from the ability to make a living applying it. Make no mistake, communication skills and communication awareness can be the difference between earning a comfortable living in the Fitness Industry, or instead, being part of the more common statistic of being gone from the industry within an 18‐24 months period. And this is true whether you are a coach or a trainer. Furthermore, to be able to be occupationally vertically mobile within this industry also demands developing acute communication skills and communication awareness from coach to client. The most unfortunate mistake of the information myth this industry perpetuates is that wannabe coaches and trainers continue to pursue new information or someone else’s interpretation of information at the expense of developing and honing their own coaching communication skills and awareness. To my mind the difference between success and failure for a wannabe professional in this industry is not ‘how much you know’ but ‘how well you communicate’. This chapter will explore coaching communication skills and awareness in greater detail.

Effective coaching is all about non‐linear interactive communication. The interactive nature of this relationship must be internalized as a real entity. The coach must understand the relationship as an entity in and of itself. And this is entity is always changing. Hence the entity of the coaching relationship should be perceived as being ‘alive’. This is the first reality to develop in terms of coaching skill and awareness. This is an entity that when properly nourished will continue to change and grow. To pretend, as the industry does, that the coaching relationship is one‐dimensional, would be akin to communicating with a child the same way at age 16 as you would at age 6. Again, counselling and guiding is qualitatively different than dictating and prescribing. Adequate coaching communication skills and awareness embraces the notion that coaching can be progressive, regressive, passionate, dispassionate, prescriptive and descriptive as well as all elements in between. The communication skill and awareness is all about knowing when and how to employ specific feedback. It’s about having an intuitive knowledge for employing the strategies and tactics discussed in the previous chapter. The effective communication skill is person‐oriented, not protocol based. Once again this is a fundamental reality mentioned so often in this project. Only when the coach rightfully understands this as the base and structure of his job can he appropriately develop his own



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effective communication skills and awareness. It is only by employing this communication skill and awareness that effective coaching can provide clients with ongoing options within the client’s own experience of protocol and its application. This is never as black and white and one‐dimensional as the industry likes to project. What positive relationship ever is?

There will be times when coaching direction must be emotionally neutral, and times when communication necessitates being emotionally emphatic. To think all coaching communication is a matter of “instruction” only is a coaching set back; not a coaching enhancement. Embracing the coaching relationship as a live entity means recognizing the client’s needs and tone of communication at any given time. ‘Keeping it alive’ means knowing when and how to guide and when and how to critique as well; often doing both at the same time. The communication skills and awareness are the coach’s responsibility for the most part. The coach sets the tone for interaction. But the client is a live component as well; and their interaction will be affected by their situation, their circumstance, and their knowledge base. All of these components of their communication may also be changed or altered at any given time. (Hence the example mentioned above: a parent communicating with a 6 years old having a tantrum is much different than a parent communicating with a 6 years old at peace. And still communicating in the same manner with that previous 6 yrs old, when they are 16 yrs old obviously represents a lack of communication skills and awareness for any parent.) Developing coaching communication skill and awareness works the same way for coaches. The coach must be able to bend but not break within the delivery of any correspondence. And within the coach’s own frame of reference he needs to be clear about his purpose and honest about his motives.

Developing adequate coaching communication skills and awareness means keeping communication on point, on the subject and with a targeted and specific relevance. This mandate of communication allows for the effective coach to be flexible but still maintain a framework of communication consistency which a client relates to. It allows for the coach to ‘keep it alive’ guidance‐wise. Sometimes a coaching communication may be about motivation; it may be about consistency; it may be about critique or clarification. All these elements go beyond mere dictation and instruction of applied knowledge. There is nothing less effective than a coach who only has a one‐dimensional dogmatic approach to any and all interaction with a client. Not every client communication and interaction is reducible to some physiological component of diet or training. For any coach or expert to think in such myopic terms is not only near‐sighted and limited, it’s also mistaken. Coaching communication skills and awareness mean entertaining the whole of a client interaction; the tone, the subject, the client, the situation, and the circumstance. For any leader to think that any interaction is somehow reducible to only one realm (the physical) is to miss the “entity” that is the coaching relationship.



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The establishment of communication skill and awareness for any given coach means always knowing that a coach’s message is only as effective as the result it garners. It does little good for a coach to show off his own knowledge base within an interaction if the communication does not somehow serve the client. This is a common mistake. Too often coaches interact based on their own level of knowledge. They communicate in a manner to impress more so than to guide the client. And this is reinforced by an industry which continues to dictate that knowledge as information is the key to advancement in the industry. Instead, a coach needs to address the relationship entity. The coach needs to establish why and how to involve the client to actively and properly be engaged in feedback and interaction. And this will vary from individual to individual. This is why mere communication of information or instruction is so limited if it does not consider the actual client and the atmosphere of the interaction. Communication coaching skill and awareness means a coach is clear and concise in terms of interaction and purpose of communication. And he can only be so, if his interaction is based on who the client is as an individual, and not “what” the specific information may be he is trying to impart. The awareness element informs the coach ‘how’ to communicate with this particular client and not just ‘what’ to communicate within the interaction. And yet this is but one more aspect of the information bias the industry seems to have upside down. Sometimes purposeful coaching communication is not about instruction, information, nor client compliance. Often a communication may be to engage the client to consider an alternative choice to the application of their ongoing process. Coaching communication with awareness can often mean not only employing client feedback but seeing beyond it as well. Instructing clients as to various options even within coaching interaction can also mean having an awareness to give a client time to assimilate this instruction. I often have to give clients new or different options for presenting their feedback. And this is to make their feedback more efficient and organized so that my response can be so as well. Coaching skill and awareness can go well beyond the content of a client interaction. And any given interaction can also serve the purpose of just enhancing or reinforcing the coaching relationship as well. Not every single communication will necessitate an instruction or information response in the physical realm. Only by developing coaching communication skill and awareness can the coach effectively use various nuance of interaction to further establish this entity of the coaching relationship. It is qualitative and variant; not fixed and one‐dimensional.

But this is not to imply that communication is somehow “conversational”. No. This would not reflect the entity of the coaching relationship. Effective communication must always be direct. It’s best to get right to the heart of the matter and the tone of an interaction always. Attempting subtleties and indirect posturing is ineffective. Skilled and aware communication is direct and as immediate (timely) as possible always. This is especially true when communicating critique. Whether the context of interaction is supportive or critical, communication must be delivered with similar timing and consistency. Too many coaches often



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delay feedback which may be critical in nature or potentially provocative. This is a mistake. Skilled and aware communication is always consistent with timing and delivery of message. And no matter what tone of context may be necessary, the skilled and aware coach always communicates constructive message and meaning, even if the context is critical or correctional. And the timeliness is important when delivering these types of communication. The coach who always responds and interacts in a timely manner is less likely to have a message be taken out of context within interaction. Consistency of response is a coaching skill, regardless of message or context. And this is especially relevant when interaction is on‐line coaching.

Relaying relevant instruction or guidance to the client is about action, not delayed action. Too often coaches delay decision making and therefore client interaction while they seek to gather “more information”. This is a coaching nemesis. Both client and coach can get lost in a sea of information in this industry. This does not translate into the personal, practical, professional, and proactive mandate of effective coaching interaction. Coaching delayed is coaching denied. For a truly qualified coach, seldom is it necessary to gather ‘more information’. As I’ve already stated, information is not knowledge. But more importantly, information is not knowledge about the client. Only the skilled and aware coach has that particular insight. And this is what he should act on.

And while clients are responsible for the consequences and results of their actions; the coach is responsible for the interactive tone of their communication. It is the coach’s role to manage and guide in a manner and means which instils an attitude of client consistency and discipline in their application of protocol. The coach’s interaction with the client plays a role in the client’s actual experience and atmosphere of working toward their own goals. The skilled and aware coach meets the client at his/her own level of ability and progression. The client’s accountability to the coach is in actuality accountability to themselves. The coach must work to insure that this level of interaction is nurtured and sustained. And this has little to do with protocols of diets and training, and everything to do with effective and aware, skilled communication.

Understanding the Exchange Value of Coaching Communication

There is an exchange value to coaching interaction that is seldom recognized or paid due attention. This exchange value is all about message and meaning for the coach. But the interaction must be mutual and not dictatorial. If, as a coach, you find yourself doing most of the communicating, then there is a problem. Usually people who want to talk the most, have the least to say; and this is especially true in the coaching relationship. A coach needs to



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communicate message and meaning, no more, no less. The coach needs to also engage feedback to make sure the message is understood. If a coach explains too much or micro analyzes every detail, then often what is truly important can get lost in the length of the communication exchange. By saying too much, the coach can actually devalue the impact of his own communication. Sound communication stays on point and is as brief as possible. This actually increases the exchange value of a coaching communication. Targeted communication should be easily absorbed and understood by a client. This is part of the professional coaching communication environment. The aware coach communicates just enough that the client is always engaged and interested. Over time, the client understands the coach will not waste time with rhetoric or conversation. This increases the exchange value of coaching input. A client will value and respect skilled and aware coaching interaction based in the professional interactive environment created by the coach, unique to him and each client.

Good coaches know how to effectively and diplomatically reshape interaction in an ongoing process to get only the information they need and nothing extraneous to the coaching relationship. Allowing clients to also give books of information (too much information) during interaction is over‐indulging the client’s ego needs as well. The skilled and aware coach will realize that some clients are seeking something beyond “coaching” within the coaching relationship entity. To be an effective coach, the coach has to be able to shape and reshape client interaction and feedback. The coach is always mindful of seeking and accumulating appropriate information only. Communication exchanges may necessitate some long interaction at times. But the skilled coach does not need to dominate this interaction. The more a coach feels the need to dominate the interactive experience, the less effective he is, and the less exchange value the communication will have. Usually coaches who feel a need to dominate an interaction are doing so because they are trying to convince the client of some point or another. The best coaches, however, are not in the ‘convincing’ business. The skilled and aware coach focuses always on the guidance aspect of coaching. Communication is not about being right, but about being understood. The fitness industry seems to have this backwards. What bears repeating is that skilled and aware coaching is about an interactive, non‐linear, progressive relationship between coach and client. This relationship is process‐based, not protocol based. The exchange value of the interaction of coach and client is increased when the coach sets the tone for ongoing interaction based on this relationship entity. Clients can ‘find information’ anywhere these days. The coach is more than an information dispatcher. And the exchange value between coach and client appreciates when a coach coaches people instead of only imparting information.

So, as previously mentioned in Chapter 3, the best coaches are the ones who not only listen, but also hear what is being communicated from the client. The coach considers not only content, but context of any client interaction. For instance, does the client communicate and



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interact with clarity, confidence, and competence? Skilled and aware coaching considers clients needs. Skilled and aware coaching is about valuing and engaging client feedback. However, coaches are human too. (Most of them.) A coach can often have his own feelings about any given client. Skilled and aware coaching means acknowledging this subjective awareness. The important matter for the coach’s consideration is that his own feeling regarding any client does not turn into a judgement of the client. Coaching in the Fitness Industry is still just a job. And even though it is an interactive relationship entity, the role of coach should always be one that is emotionally unattached. Skilled coaches do not pretend their feelings are not there when they are. And acting or interacting based on these feelings is just ego run amuck. The best coaches interact based on awareness; they do not react based on emotion. So although the coach must consider a client’s knowledge, ability, attitude, situation, circumstance, and personality, the skilled coach can still remain emotionally neutral to them. And well he should. The aware coach communicates in a manner where he can bend but not break in terms of client interaction. The aware coach must be flexible and not robotic for effective and valued communication to continue. At any given time the triangle of awareness will weigh a communication more heavily in one area than another. (physical, emotional, mental) Too often coaches in this industry can only communicate from an ivory tower of scientific expertise. This is limited. And such a one‐dimensional approach only devalues the interactive exchange with clients. As much as a coach must communicate message and meaning, it is equally often just as important for a client to know that his communication has been ‘felt’ and not just ‘received’ by the coach. There will be critical periods of interaction in the coach/client relationship that must be met with the warmth of human interaction and not the cold sterile environment of scientific pretentiousness.

When a coach does find himself in a predicament where his first impulse is to ‘react’ to a client engagement, he needs to step back from the interactive exchange. An effective means of communication at this point is for the coach to just consciously disconnect the message from the messenger. In other words, the aware coach just reconsiders the provocative communication but with no name attached to it. The aware coach “depersonalizes” the communication before responding. This helps the aware coach and it prevents him from presenting any preconceived biases toward the client. By disconnecting the message from the messenger, the aware coach’s mind can more freely render appropriate commentary, whether it needs to be critical, supportive, advisory, etc. The important thing is that the communication is reconsidered by the coach so that it is rendered emotionally neutral. This way the coach can be more confident in re‐initiating the ongoing exchange. And the exchange value remains in tact for the client. Being emotionally neutral in a coaching strategy of communication does not mean being uninterested. And it does not mean the coach cannot be provocative if a situation dictates. Often, a provocative message can be very motivating for a client to receive. More often than not, a client will willingly receive a provocative communication from the coach



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because it does illustrate the coach’s interest in the client. The counter‐intuitive point here is that it may often be necessary to depersonalize a message to render it emotionally neutral so that the coach can actually be personal in his response, but personal in a manner that is professional, practical and proactive.

For instance, I had a client who considered himself a high level competitor. But he made one excuse after another for never ever sticking to diet or program application. The client hadn’t put together even three consistent weeks of training and dieting and always had an excuse. Yet the client was also quick to engage interactions regarding effective drug use etc. After a few months of this the client asked for a “new program”. I used the request as a way to engage the client in a reality based interaction that justified some provocation. But first I disconnected the message from the messenger. Then I just asked myself, ‘how would I respond to any other client with a similar history who made this request?’ So I just engaged the client by saying in no uncertain terms that although he considered himself a high level competitor, he was actually probably the least consistent and least committed competitor I had trained to date. I explained to him why he didn’t need a new program when he had not even completed this one, uninterrupted for more than a week or two. I was able to be emotionally neutral in my response to the client while also being provocative in terms of delivering a much needed reality check for him. And I was able to do so by first disconnecting his original request from the person himself. Then I just imagine a “hypothetical” Joe Smith, with the same history, and I responded accordingly. (See previous chapter on the hypothetical tactic of communication. It can also work for the coach within his own preparation for interaction and client engagement.)

The aware coach may effectively disconnect the message from the messenger; but at the same time the aware coach may still lack in skilled communication techniques and strategies. (See previous chapter.) I find it helpful in such situations for a coach to reduce what he wants to say to three key words. And then the coach interacts based on these three words he wants to convey in the interactive exchange. By narrowing his mental focus in this way, the aware coach effectively removes any emotional influence as well. This helps him to reshape his own communication strategy if circumstances dictate. By resetting his mental focus on three key words the coach is less likely to present unwarranted commentary. This tactic also helps to reset the communication to being about the message and not about the client. In the above example, I set my key three words that I needed to convey to the client to be ‘undisciplined’, ‘uncommitted’ and ‘inconsistent’. By concentrating on explaining how these three words applied to him, the message was effectively emotionally neutral. And instead of reacting defensively, the client heeded the provocative message and meaning with the positive intent of the interaction.



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In essence, coaching awareness is like putting on a coaching hat when engaging client interaction. The aware coach minds a specific role as coach. And while he acknowledges and depends on his own personality to influence this role, coaching is still more about the role, and less about the coach’s own personality and feelings. Coaching awareness means paying attention to always being “in” the coaching relationship. The coach has a responsibility to interact as a coach, and not as an individual separate from the role. The aware coach does not allow his opinions of the client outside of the coaching relationship to influence his thinking or guidance and instruction. This is why the word “aware” is so important when discussing the coaching communication focus. But because of the totally subjective element of the coaching relationship; forming opinions about clients is inevitable, whether conscious or subconscious. This is why it is so important for the coach to form boundaries within the ongoing interactive environment of exchange. This is true for doctors, lawyers, teachers, and most other relationship‐oriented professions. And the same imperative is true for aware coaching as well. Yet this element of coaching and boundaries of appropriate communication is totally ignored in the industry.

Communication Boundaries

Like many of these professions, coaching is all about making decisions, evaluating performances, troubleshooting, and often coaching is even about counselling to some degree or another. But this is a fine line for interactive exchange. Coaches are not therapists, any more than are teachers or lawyers etc. A coach does not “fix” personality disorders, various neuroses, or other psychological problems. And to be sure, there are many clients in the Fitness Industry who suffer many industry‐related neuroses, such as eating disorders, obsessive/compulsive tendencies and the like. Because there is so much to consider with client assessment, there needs to be even more emphasis placed on setting boundaries. And this is a serious responsibility for the aware coach. Developing the coaching relationship will take on its own uniqueness with each individual client. And while this uniqueness is for sure a coaching asset; it does not reduce the need for always having a background set of boundaries in place for the duration of the relationship. This is the coach’s task and duty to set the tone for professional interaction. These boundaries are relative and not absolute; as they must be because of the unique and individual reality of each coaching situation. And because the coaching is all about a non‐linear interactive experience, boundaries can also float back and forth as the relationship grows and develops. But the boundaries are always first and foremost about maintaining a professional and yet still personal relationship with the client; very similar to the professions mentioned above.



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The coaching relationship is all about accountability and responsibility on both sides. And the coach not only sets the example but he is the example for the relationship. This is why his coaching and communication awareness is an imperative skill to develop and hone. The goal is always to facilitate an ongoing interaction in a context that is effective, understood, practical and engaging. This doesn’t mean that problems never arise. What it does mean is that a coach who is aware, and who has set professional boundaries, is the better equipped coach for handling problems or miscommunications when they occur. (And they will, as they do in any strong and effective relationship.) But any miscommunication or disagreement is the responsibility of the coach. He must be willing to own that. Great coaches never seek to assign “blame” even if they could be right to do so. Aware coaches know that assigning “blame” on a client really serves no purpose. Once again, the aware coach emphasizes the quality of communication ahead of the message it imparts. Being right, for the coach, is not nearly as impactful as doing right, on the client’s behalf. All aware coaches avoid creating any circumstance or situation where the word “blame” is even applicable. This emphasizes, once again, how creating a professional interactive communication context, with boundaries, can serve to prevent problems from manifesting right from the beginning. And the professions mentioned above also flourish in the exact same manner.

Developing coaching communication skills and awareness is a lot like preventative medicine for forging a potential long term relationship. As this chapter demonstrates, all or most of this has little to do with domain knowledge of fitness; and everything to do with enhanced people skills.


• This chapter refers to the coaching relationship as an “entity”. What does this mean exactly? How does thinking of your relationship with clients in this way enhance your own coaching skills and awareness? Think and illustrate an example of such a relationship entity in your own life.

• Why is consistency of response and timeliness of response such an important element in the coach/client entity? How is this an awareness and a skill for communication?

• What is meant by the phrase, the ‘exchange value of communication’? What are the relevant points of consideration here? How does thinking about your relationship with your clients in terms of this ‘exchange value’ enhance your coaching communication skills and awareness?



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• Why is setting boundaries for the interactive coaching experience a responsibility for the coach to actively exercise? What would be your own personal and professional boundaries for communication?

Scenarios:

• A fairly new client keeps giving you biofeedback that his/her training and diet is continual being interrupted because of relationship issues. He/she tells you how much he/she trusts your opinion and wants to know what you think he/she should do about the relationship. Use the outlines above to formulate a response to the situation.

• A fairly new client keeps contracting you about what he hears on other websites, web‐boards, and other social media. He even considers T.V. talk show advice on training and diet and compares it with your own guidance. The constant asking of ‘what about this, what about that?’ is interfering with your coaching progress and undermining your authority as well. Using the tools of this chapter, respond to this client in a meaningful way.

• You have made a name for yourself as an on‐line coach. A new client has found you after ‘surfing’ the net and liking what she thinks you have to say. Yet she keeps confronting you with the negative comments about you on the web, and asking you to defend against them. Based on this chapter, how do you handle this interaction?

After reviewing these mentoring notes and addressing these scenario sample interactions, what have you learned about your own coaching skills and awareness for effective interaction? What areas do you need to work on? Notice how much of real interaction with clients goes well beyond a discussion of training and diet etc.



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Chapter 10 Advancing Coaching Awareness

Chapter 9 discussed communication skills and awareness for effective coaching. This chapter goes a little deeper in terms of skills for coaching awareness and interaction with clients. The discussion in this chapter is one that should shape initial and ongoing coaching preparation for client interaction. Too often the industry dogma of systems, science, and programs, replaces just common interaction between the coach and potential and existing clients. This is a huge mistake. Even with my own mentoring students, this mistake is common. Most coaches want to quickly jump to an “agenda” when answering potential new client inquiries or existing client inquiries. Often the backbone of this agenda is a desire to illustrate expertise and mastery of diet or training methodology. Whether this is called for or not, it is a mistake for any coach to respond to an inquiry with an automatic and assumed agenda. And yet this is exactly the kind if incorrect communication bias which exists in the Fitness Industry.

I call the kind of effective initial and ongoing client communication involved in coaching “attention skills”. And these attention skills take work. Again, while they cannot be taught, they can be practiced consistently until they become a manner for addressing all coaching clients and potential clients. As a starting point, whenever possible, pay attention to client interaction. We will explore this further below. But at the very beginning, attention skills mean the coach addresses communication with the following priorities: 1) dialogue “at” clients as little as possible, and never if possible; 2) dialogue “to” clients by paying attention to each point of engagement, whether in response or initiating interaction; 3) as often as possible dialogue “with” clients in terms of ongoing interaction. If the coach sets his agenda first, as most do in this industry, he is reducing himself and reducing his client/potential client as well. Interaction with clients should set the agenda, and not be an agenda! Yet, most wannabe coaches in this industry assume the “job” is always to answer interaction with an illustration of domain knowledge. This usually leads directly to slotting people into diets and programs without true attention to the interaction and client assessment involved in forging the coaching relationship. The proper attention involved in client interaction is always attentive to the triangle of awareness discussed in earlier chapters. Too often coaches are quick to want to just “assign” answers and programs to potential clients without much attention paid directly to the client and the importance of interaction with him. When a client or potential new client initiates an interaction with a coach, the coach should address each point the client/potential client presents. If the coach is responding honestly, this can often have little to do with his expertise and everything to do with forging an understanding toward ongoing communication. The coach “invites” correspondence as a first priority. But instead, when a coach responds to inquiry with



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the agenda always toward illustrating his own expertise, he risks talking “at” the person, rather than engaging talking “to” or “with” the person.

If you are attempting to be a coach in this industry, especially an on‐line coach, you have to be able to deal with potential clients from all walks of life and levels of understanding. To only be able to coach clients you relate to is a vocation killer. But in the Fitness Industry this tends to be the norm. And it tends to also be why most wannabe on‐line coaches find themselves out of work and out of the industry in short stay. But this is the truth. Domain knowledge accumulation in the fitness industry has segmented expertise in a manner that negates the coach’s potential. We see this all the time in the industry: Background tends to dictate clientele. So we have strong‐men coaching strong‐men, bodybuilders coaching bodybuilders, power lifters coaching power lifters, functional coaches training functional athletes etc. So the “attention” factor for clients and potential clients tends to be lost in specific bias of coaches themselves and their pursuit of their own interests. This is limiting in so many ways. Usually, only those at the top or with a very specific reputation within such niche markets make a serious income or can forge a lasting career in such narrowly defined markets. The key to sustaining a career as an on‐line coach in the Fitness Industry is to not limit oneself to niche markets. Furthermore, the coach needs to properly devote attention appropriately to and on the client and not his own interest bias.

This means developing effective communication skills to be able to address clients and potential clients regarding their own area of interest. Properly developed communication skills can be an exhausting skill acquisition. But in actuality in terms of long term career sustainability it is these skills for client attention that will make or break a sustainable career as an on‐line coach. Industry knowledge will only take a coaching intern so far. And in the modern internet age we witness the opposing truth as well. Many modern internet “experts” lack even a working knowledge of the principles. They go to symposiums designed to show them how to manipulate the consumer in the Fitness Industry; how to market to them; how to get them to buy a product or service etc. This just reinforces that domain knowledge, especially in terms of accumulating information, is NOT the determining factor for a career as a coach in the Fitness Industry. Knowledge and domain expertise, in my opinion, are secondary to knowing how to engage clients and potential clients by devoting due attention on them.

No one is going to find any of these skills being addressed at certification presentations or at industry symposiums. The information myth, unfortunately, is currently blind to the requisite skills needed to be an effective on‐line coach in the fitness industry. Make note that it is people and communication skills first and specific domain knowledge second that will lend to a sustainable career as a coach or on‐line coach in the fitness industry.



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The first place to start is in acknowledgement that everyone is born and raised with at least some interaction skills that come naturally: A personal style, if you will. This is our nature and our personality. And this is a strength and marks a good place to start. A potential coach should underline his own personal style and work to these strengths. At the same, time coaches will find themselves lacking in some area of communication and interactive ability. Instead of ignoring these, the coach should find these weaknesses and set out to strengthen them. Previous chapters have made attempts to identify and work on just such communication skills and implement exercises to address, identify and work on these various strategies and techniques for effective coaching communication. Without enhancing skills and abilities for interaction, the fledgling coach will find himself only able to communicate effectively with like minded individuals. And this is a career killer.

So what skill does someone need to initiate an experience toward a mastery of coaching? The answer at first is very basic. Effective coaching is all about being yourself, first and foremost. Too many wannabe coaches set out by trying to assume a role that is not authentically reflective of who they are. Be yourself: Coach with a style that reflects who you are as a person. Being genuine will lend itself greatly over time to being competent. But this also means being your higher genuine self. Too often, as previously discussed, coaches attach needless levels of pride to their role. This makes them more attached to wanting to be right about everything. And this has little to do with proper attention skills which are all about the client. And within the interaction of just being genuinely oneself, the coach must also be prepared, be focused, and make his attention client‐oriented and not information‐based or knowledge‐centred. Either of these latter points of emphasis will take the coach away from being genuine when it comes to proper and focused client attention.

Being genuine also applies to the action of coaching. A coach has to have his attention properly place as will be discussed below. But the starting point to this is that the coach has to genuinely care about the progress, process, and goals of the clients. Coaching is a service industry and this is often left on the floor in the fitness industry. Coaching is a service industry; fitness knowledge is merely the vehicle that drives it. Too often coaches are struggling to make a reputation for themselves or to make ends meet early in their coaching development. This leads them to be more self‐interested in their bottom line than genuinely giving devoted attention to clientele. This kind of self‐interest will always reveal itself eventually. The coach, who continues to measure effectiveness by how a client makes them look, or how much income clients are generating, is a coach prone to incompetence over time. The reason is because the coach is not being genuine about his job as being ‘service‐oriented’. When the coach puts his own needs first he incorrectly assumes the client is there to service him, and not the other way around. This will be felt within the coaching relationship at some point.



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Another part of the action of being genuine as a coach also regards the implementation of methodology. Again the mistake in the Fitness Industry is too much emphasis on information = knowledge. This usually leads wannabe coaches to adapting anything and everything that comes down the pike. Once a certain level of expertise is acquired, coaches need to weigh information against their own methodology and application. Just because another coach uses “this” diet approach or “that” training strategy does not mean a coach adapts it just because it is current or popular. (See my discussion of the term “vogueing”) Being genuine means developing a confidence in the application of your own methodology within the individuality of client attention. Just because another expert interprets something a certain way, doesn’t mean it helps you as a coach to do so for your own client. So, being genuine means attention for the client takes precedence. Mastery of coaching means being genuine in client interest, client application, and a working confidence in your own knowledge base beyond what may be new or vogue in the industry.

The Science of the non‐Science: Developing Coaching Intuition

Yes, read this heading again a few times to let it sink in. It sounds counter‐intuitive and almost blasphemous based on the current industry standard of accreditation. But within methodology and application; and especially within the interactive role of coach, intuition is an important skill to nurture and trust. But this intuition must go beyond the coach’s “opinion” of his own conclusions. A good coach uses intuition as a means to inform his decisions and his awareness within client interaction and communication. How to develop effective intuition and trustworthy intuition begins with focused and appropriate client attention.

Attention/Intention

It is amazing to me after so many years that I even have to discuss the nature of client “attention”. Yet also after so many years, the mandate of client attention that I seem to take for granted is one of the most ignored elements of coaching awareness that I have continued to witness my whole career. The intention for any good coach should be client‐focused first. This means each client is attended to individually according to the triangle of awareness discussed in earlier chapters. Client attention necessitates that interaction and communication come first, and protocol discussion, advice take place within this context. Coaching intuition can only be developed by keeping close attention on client interaction and communication progression of the coaching relationship. This is not only a mandate but a responsibility for good coaching. Building attention skills takes work. For effective coaching, building attention skills is a



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preventative requisite for troubleshooting as the relationship progresses. Attention skills take work, and developing them goes way beyond dictating protocol or delivering information.

Paying attention to client feedback and interaction is imperative, not only for what is said, but what is not said. Context is everything within a message of communication content. This is even more important for on‐line coaching. Hence, I like to break down the term ‘paying’ and ‘attention’. The payment/cost of attention for coaches is the time invested to learning about a client via ongoing interaction. It requires the coach to be responsible beyond protocol to a level of effective coaching style unique to the specific client. All the domain knowledge in the world cannot be effective for a coach who is not paying attention to the context of client feedback and interaction. This attention goes well beyond the coach’s domain expertise. It is essential for the coach to be able to put himself in the client’s position, and to recognize his own role of providing a service within that context. If a coach feels from the onset that he cannot be patient enough to give a specific client due attention for whatever reason, he should not enter into the coaching relationship to begin with. And the simplest place to start is the most general. How do you put yourself in the client’s position? Just by being human within the context of interaction.

How good do you feel when someone gives you their undivided attention? It’s easy to recall situations where someone was serving you with divided attention; by example, talking on a cell phone while serving you in a retail purchase etc. We measure how effective a waiter or waitress is based on the undivided attention they give, as well as the timeliness of service. This is just as true for coaching clients. Many new clients report to me how impressed they are with the length of my responses and the speed with which I respond to inquiry or communication. Many report this has not been their experience with other on‐line coaches. This lack of attention rests squarely on the shoulders of the coach. It usually also suggests that coaches incorrectly assume their “expertise” is the driving nature of the relationship which tends to neglect productive client attention. And in terms of coaching advice, this lack of timely communication is also a coaching failure. Any good dog trainer will teach that the time to correct or reinforce behaviour is while it is occurring. If a dog empties his bowels on your living room carpet while you are at work, there is no way you can effectively correct that behaviour hours later when you return home. The time for proper ‘attention’ has come and gone. Coaching, because it is a relationship, works the same way. A client must be a priority in terms of receiving interactive attention in terms of response and timeliness of response. A coach who responds to a client communication days later is an ineffective coach. It’s like telling the client he is not a priority. Dealing with clients in a coaching relationship should live outside the lines of time management. Time management is something you do with material tasks and assignments, not with people. Coaching clients pay for your attention, not just your expertise. And really, they also pay for your undivided attention as well. For the coach, developing intuition requires a



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client‐focused undivided attention anyway. So the coach serves his own interest by serving his client with undivided attention.

Each and every client interaction requires its own style of undivided attention. This is a coaching skill developed over time by paying attention. The coach’s intention should be two‐fold: it should be focused on client attention; and it should be focused on process. Coaching intuition is properly developed within this context of client interaction.

By example, I have studied and observed coaches for years. I have never seen a single coach on his cell phone during a practice or a game. His players are subject to his undivided attention. And the best coaches develop their coaching instincts from this attention‐base. For the coach in the fitness industry, if a client is paying you for your attention, he should have it. Coaches who think clients only pay them for their expertise will be ineffective coaches in the long haul.(The relationship will be too stale, too cold, and too impersonal.) Coaches in other industries get paid a lot of money beyond their expertise. They also get paid for their intuitive understanding of their role and their job. Coaches in the fitness industry need to heed this lesson as well. I witness wannabe coaches in this industry answering cell phones or personal texting while also answering client email. Some of them are even on the internet or Facebook or other social media while interacting or answering client communication. This kind of divided attention not only is unfair to the client but hurts the coach in the long run. By interacting with clients with a divided attention, a coach will never develop the intuition and contextual awarness for good coaching that can sustain a career. Divided coaching attention is akin to the coach shooting himself in the foot career‐wise.

Undivided Client Attention Leads to Enhanced Observation Skills

If you coach in person, then client observation is much easier to develop. Yet even here, I witness so called “coaches” rushing to answer cell‐phones, engaging other people while working with clients, and all kinds of other means and manners illustrating divided attention. Acute observations skills cannot be developed this way. And for on‐line coaches, developing observation skills for client interaction is even more important. Being observant of clients requires and leads to greater and more enhanced communication skills and intuition for the coach. It also lends for the coach to have greater appreciation and understanding of nuance to every specific interaction. Observation skills beyond just communication context helps coaches read between the lines of communication and often help clients more clearly understand their own thinking as well. Developing acute observation skills for communication and coaching can only be accomplished with an undivided and focused client‐attention.



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Observation skills are also developed by engaging and encouraging client interaction as well. Coaches too often think in one‐dimensional, client ‘communication and response’ context. This can often be very inefficient if a coach is truly paying attention. Only the laziest coaches entertain unilateral one‐way interaction. In terms of developing observation skills, it’s ok for the coach to ask relevant questions as well as answer them. This client engagement lets the client know he has the coach’s undivided attention and interest. And when a client answers coaching questions, the observant coach gains insight and depth as well. His coaching skills are enhanced by paying attention. Undivided attention lends to developing better observation skills. Better observation skills further enhance effective client‐attention and focus. The two continue to feed each other and in this way, the aware coach is much further ahead than coaches who continue to chase information as an enhanced knowledge base. There is just as much “knowledge” for effective coaching awareness to be gained from enhancing the coaching entity.

Overzealous coaches often anticipate interaction. This is a mistake. When a coach makes assumptions regarding client interactions, he tends to then interact with his own agenda. One of the ways to avoid this mistake, especially with on‐line coaching is to practice communication “reflection”. For instance, in email correspondence I read each client email twice before engaging response. I read the client’s communication once consciously from my own perspective as coach and expert. Then I read the client communication again, as if from their position of interaction or inquiry. From there I make notes of points I need to address and the most effective context of the correspondence as well. (Using the triangle of awareness) Only when I consider a communication twice from these vantage points do I respond. This can be time consuming. But over time, and with many different clients, this practice of reflection also enhances observation and awareness skills for the coach. Observation and reflection are component parts of ‘paying attention’ in a client‐focused relationship. This is difficult to do if not impossible, with an industry knowledge‐based only focus. Developing the capacity for informed intuition within the coaching relationship necessitates client focused undivided attention. This then is balanced with industry knowledge in the coaching relationship. The individual client is treated as an individual. The client is not just an extension of protocol. Real coaching with this type of awareness requires real patience as well. The coach learns to be patient with himself and his preparation. And more importantly, the real coach learns to be patient with clients and client interaction.

Notice also that these elements of coaching awareness are verbs, not nouns. Paying attention, being observant, and being reflective are all active, not passive elements of the coaching process. Each and every one element of coaching attention requires coaching consideration. To think of these elements as nouns or something to be “studied” misses the point. These



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elements must be practiced and strengthened. Coaching is an ongoing active and changing process. These tools are used to sharpen the coach’s awareness within this unique process.

Empowerment in Process

If the coach properly develops these skills of paying attention ,then he can also grow the coaching relationship as the process unfolds. A great coach goes beyond protocol and inspires a client to take on more and more responsibility for their own goals and awareness. The better the coach, the more effective the coach, the less control he needs over the interactive nature of the process of coaching. This is a lot like parenting as previously discussed. Over time, parents who ‘hover’ only exhaust themselves. Research also shows that this sort of hovering also creates dependence in their kids, rather than fostering independence. Well the same is true in coaching. This also represents a qualitative gradation between trainer and coach. The trainer (mentality) wants consistent control. The great coach knows the advantage of being able to let go of control when the timing is right. However, the good coach can only know this by paying attention, being observant, and practicing reflection. Coaching well should mean that the coach does not experience the same type of client dependence as the coaching process continues. Even the nature of trouble‐shooting and problem solving should change over time if the coach is empowering the client with responsibility they can handle.

Client maturation should be a goal for the aware and effective coach. The coach should empower clients to make certain decisions and answer specific questions themselves. The coach is still there for reference and support. This reflects the coach’s role of going from guiding light to mirror over time. (Gambetta) This can only be accomplished in a coaching relationship that is client‐focused and client‐aware. As the coach builds client’s confidence and competence, he reinforces this by inviting them to make decisions and answer questions as well. And while the client will still make many mistakes, by this point he has come to learn he has a place to go for correction without judgement. This is another reason getting away from measuring and testing everything can actually be a tremendous boon for empowering clients, beyond numbers to the level of learning during their experience of process and application of protocol. This is what coaching ‘should be’ and is much different than the trainer mentality so overly reinforced in the industry.

Problems will always present themselves for the client trying to learn and accomplish specific goals. When these problems do arise, the difference between the coach and trainer is that the coach thinks in terms of possibilities, not just solutions, and not personalities. A good coach will use the powers of observation to know when and how to include the client in actively solving their own issues. For problems that are less difficult, it is empowering for the client to be



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included as part of the solution. This should be what coaching is all about; always moving the client forward and advancing and enhancing his own understanding. When a coach can take a ‘hands off’ approach to a client issue, he may advise a ‘try this or try that’ option for the client. This is much different than just dictating solutions, especially to issues where there is no one solution, but a myriad of possibilities. I will often get clients asking me simple questions they can solve themselves. They just lack the confidence to do so. A client may want a reasonable food substitution for one food over another. Another client who is on a 5 days program, just had his shifts changed at work and is starting night school. He can no longer train 5 Days per week. Both ask “what should I do?” Because these questions have rudimentary answers, instead of just dictating the answer to the client, I invite them to be part of solving the question. I am still there for them. I present them with options. I invite them to choose, and I may even inquire why they make the choice they make, just to insure it is based on sound rationale and illustrates a working knowledge for the circumstance at hand.

True and relevant coaching is more than just providing answers. That is but a part of coaching. Coaching, like teaching and parenting, is about engaging an interactive process for learning. Coaching empowers clients to be their own problem solver as their capacity and understanding improve in time. It’s not about passing the buck, but investing the energy in the client, not the protocol. Protocol assignment is just part of this investment.

This industry reinforces this notion of looking for the right answer all the time. This is limiting and confusing. And the reason is because more often than not, there is no one answer, no one right answer. There is, as I stated, a myriad of possibilities based on expertise and perspective. Given this reality, client self‐expression should be nurtured within the problem solving process of coaching. With this insight, as the client’s competence, confidence, and understanding progresses, he can be challenged and included in greater levels of decision making. When the timing is right, clients tend to find this most invigorating, and it adds to their coaching experience.

Too many wannabe coaches approach their client relationship like a math equation. They always seek right or wrong answers. And they pass this mentality on to the client with less emphasis on efficient communication. By using measurements and right/wrong implications, the wannabe coach is just putting pressure on a client to perform and abide in narrow ranges of application that suits the coach. Once again, this mentality makes it all about the coach, and less about the client. For coaching, this is a mistake born the information = knowledge myth.

The truth is; any and all applications and protocols within the Fitness Industry are a lot more like scoring music rather than some mathematical right/wrong equation. Protocol design, and more importantly, coaching are art forms, more like music than math. There are less often right/wrong, and more often than not, limitless possibilities ‐ just like in music. Think about that



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for a while because it is one of the most difficult biases to break in the mentality of the Fitness Industry. Music is collaboration between creator and receiver. Coaching works the same way. By analogy, the coach’s job, then, is collaboration. The coach is conductor or maestro. He keeps the beat in sequence and in harmony while the client plays the notes, learns the scales, and makes the music as well. With this mentality, the client learns a program is much more than what is written on it: Just like music is much more than the notes that compose it. The client is coached to learn that what the program brings to him must be met equally with what he brings to the program. Music is subject to interpretation. And music can be good or bad; but seldom right or wrong.

Coaching skills reflect a mentality that should be process‐based and not correction‐based. The current industry bias assumes the latter over the former. This industry dogma that rides research has been internalized by wannabe coaches and trainers to suggest their job is to ‘fix’ clients; and that they somehow do this through assignment of “correct” diet and training strategy. At best, this is misleading. For coaching, interaction such a mentality can be perceived by the client as very patronizing over time. In my experience, this mentality leads coaches to being less effective in their true role. The coaching role and skills of patience, time, client focused undivided attention, should serve as tools for coaches to be leaders. And this leadership over time should be targeted for clients to eventually “fix” problems themselves. The short term ‘fix the client’ mentality is not the real world of coaching experience regardless of classroom certification dictates. The ‘fix the client’ mentality assumes all clients or potential clients need ‘fixing.’ This is an emphasis in entirely the opposite direction of client empowerment. This mentality is also one reason so many clients of the fitness industry seldom even reach their goals. Or, if they do reach their goals, they do not sustain the acquisition long term and fall back into old habits later on. This coaching mentality is misplaced. Just like protocol in the industry seems short sited, so it lends to short‐sighted coaching as well.

All this emphasis on the immediate aspects of assessment and assignment negates the ongoing process. Just like with protocol, coaching should emphasize the immediate, the residual, and the cumulative aspects of the ongoing process. Yet seldom is this addressed anywhere in the industry. Again the comparison can be made with teaching and parenting. If the client never works to learn and value the experience of problem solving their issues during the process of application, they are likely to remain dependant. This dependency leads to their own frustration over time. What I have witnessed is that coaching without attention to these residual and cumulative elements of process, leads to easy sacrifice of a goal once it is attained. This is also one reason 90% of weight loss clients regain all the weight. Without the learning and value of the process, the meaning of achieving the goal cannot be retained long term. Therefore, neither can the goal. The client does not build up and acquire the requisite psychological value for the experience of achieving the goal. There is no growth in the process.



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And this is as much an industry fault which focuses only on immediate elements of evaluation and assessment. And this reinforces the faulty mindset most clients have to begin with. So, coaching based on industry knowledge misses the point of holistic coaching based in fundamental communication skills and personal growth. Constantly working to ‘fix’ clients only in the immediate element of application just reinforces client dependency. Competence and confidence cannot be built up this way. To my mind, this represents a failure of the mentality in the industry: just as it would represent failure for teachers or parents who do the same.

In the competitive side of the industry, I see this all the time. Competitors are coached by other competitors with no knowledge of what coaching is or should be. Years later, these same competitors are just as helpless and dependant as they were years earlier. They tend to pinball between coaches, adapting to each coaches dictation of right/wrong recipes. But they do not develop a deep enough understanding of the principles to even differentiate commonalities or distinctions among coaches. So although they become more schooled in calories/grams/set/reps; they have not developed any kind of systematic competence in their experience along the way. And this is most perplexing to witness among clients who have been invested in the industry for several years. Coaching at the bare minimum should foster progress, not stagnate it by creating client dependency.

So where does the worthy coach begin? First, deal in reality. This industry pushes the envelope of marketing to people unrealistic results. This illustrates a lack of understanding of how the human body really works and adapts over time. More often than not, a coach will find himself in the position of trying to get a client to ‘unlearn’ ideas that have been marketed to them as truth. At the other end of this scale from marketing hype is the marketing science. Science is the new “vogue” marketing strategy to hide behind. But this industry has little hard science, and a lot of soft science. Research is great, but it should inform, not dictate protocol and application. Far too many experts in the new modern age ‘hide behind’ science as ‘proof’ of expertise. It is not. So the coach begins with sound and real discussion with the client regarding what is achievable.

In terms of communication, the coach needs to interact with clients in their own comprehension zone, while still communicating his own message. Clients should be engaged right from the beginning as to what fitness goals are attainable and realistic for them. There should be some discussion also as to short term, mid‐term, and long term probabilities. (Not promises.) Remember, coaching is guidance and over‐sight. There are no “promises” to be made in terms of results; only for the promises of oversight and guidance. Clients need to be able to acknowledge the fact that progress is seldom linear. From the beginning, this acknowledgement relieves perceived pressure that the client thinks he should and can improve



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in a visible ongoing basis. This is not how the body works and adapts. It’s how people in the industry market themselves or their products. Worthy coaches need to step away from these tactics and teach, from the beginning, the reality of adaptive response. The worthy coach begins with the essential understanding that dealing in reality is far more effective in the long term than just shooting for false promises or goals that are set up to fail. Building a trusted communicative relationship with a client, will lead them to pursue and be content with their own level of progress. This kind of empowerment is a mandate for the worthy coach.


• This chapter begins with a mention of “attention skills”. What does this mean? What is meant by the phrase, ‘client interaction should set the agenda; it should not be an agenda’? Explore and expand this idea.

• How does abiding in the “triangle of awareness” serve to develop your client attention skills and focus?

• As an expert in the fitness industry you will more than likely have an ‘interest bias’. Identify your interest bias. Maybe it’s bodybuilding and competition. Maybe it’s pure fitness and conditioning. Maybe it’s a dependency on research. Identify your interest bias, and then look at examples from your own coaching/training roster to see how it influences your client‐focused‐attention. How can you better use and employ your interest bias to guide your client attention instead of dictating it? What is the difference?

• Why is intuition an important skill to develop? How does it enhance coaching awareness? How does it benefit the client?

• Worthy coaching is more akin to scoring music than it is to some mathematical consistency. What is meant by this statement? How does it influence your conception for client awareness and interaction?

• What is wrong with the “fix the client” mentality in the fitness industry? How does the above analogy of music help distinguish the differences?

• Why is client empowerment important? How is it separate, if at all, from a client’s cosmetic or fitness goals? What does it serve to build for coaching purposes?



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• Exercise: Answer the following email inquiry not uncommon for coaches to receive “Hi, my name is Jane Smith. I compete in Fitness, or at least I want to. I haven’t been able to get my body in good enough shape in my last few attempts. You come highly recommended. I have had several coaches before. I’ve been satisfied with their help but never my finished physique. My last two coaches would just give me a diet and a program and tell me to contact them again in 4 weeks. And then things would come up and I would write them and they wouldn’t write me back for days, sometime even a couple weeks would go by. I’m currently being coached by ‘Fannie Fitness Champion’. She promises to get me in shape for this show. I do everything right. I am following the no carbs diet to a T. I train 4‐5 days per week. On my days off, I do Yoga or Fitness Classes or go for a run. Still, I can’t seem to get my body fat down, even on the low calories and carbs. I have 4 months till my next contest. I want to buy a one‐time program from you to help me get in peak shape. Fannie takes care of my diet and cardio, so I really just need a killer program. But if you have some interval cardio programs, I’d be up for purchasing them as well. So what do we do next? I’m excited to hear back from you.” Other than changing the names, this is not an uncommon inquiry in the coaching business. Answer this email using the tools of this chapter. Start with focused client awareness. Remember to answer without a pre‐conceived agenda. What would you say in response? How and why would you say it? Do this exercise, once, off the top of your head; then examine your response. Do it again, using the mentoring notes for this chapter. Note any differences in content or context. Focus specifically on the “how” and “why” in terms of interactive engagement.



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Chapter 11 Common Coaching Mistakes

Many of the issues discussed in this chapter have been mention before either directly or in various contexts. This chapter looks at the more fundamental and common coaching mistakes in terms of application of domain knowledge, working with the client, and within the coach and client relationship as a whole. These mistakes exist not only as single entities, but more often than not, one is also linked to another. So what starts as a coaching tactical mistake often ends up becoming a strategical one. Making these mistakes is often about trying to forge a coaching ‘style’ within the information bias discussed throughout this book thus far. If more than one of these mistakes is employed at a time, it creates an add‐on effect and ends up either cramping or crippling the coaching environment. As will become obvious, one of these common errors can be easily linked to another. They are like “cousins”, if you will.

I’ve put these various mistakes under brief headings although there are certainly cross‐over effects for each. From this chapter, the coaching student should be able to make brief notes of their own for these common coaching mistakes, and post them somewhere handy. This way, the heading titles can serve as quick reminders for the coach to check himself within his interaction, instruction, and application with his clients. The point to reinforce, once again, is what the central focus of coaching really is. The more the coach veers away from his client focus, the more likely these common mistakes are to occur.

Once again, in no particular order, the most common coaching mistakes in the Fitness Industry and for on‐line coaching, in particular, are as follows.

1) The Coaching Biases

I have discussed the coaching biases many times in various articles I’ve written. A coach always has a specific background which will influence his methodology. This is not necessarily a bad thing unless it blinds him to one‐dimensional approaches. The two specific common coaching biases, which are mistakes, are the biases of vogueing trends, and the bias of tradition. Adapting everything new that comes out of the industry is a mistake. And doing things with the client merely because “that’s the way they’ve always been done”, is also a mistake of bias. Both ends of this continuum tend to negate or objectify the actual client. This should become more obvious below. Along these lines, many coaches seem to perceive clients as extension of themselves. So with this bias, they tend to assign protocol to clients based on what they do



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themselves. This has nothing to do with properly addressing a client’s ‘needs state’, and as such, also negates or objectifies the actual client.

Effective coaching means understanding context and nuance always. This cannot be accomplished with a pre‐conceived bias toward any training or diet methodology. These biases lead to slotting clients into programs and diets, rather than more properly formulating diets and programs that “fit” the client and his particular circumstances. This necessitates understanding the “immediate” needs of the client, but also being able to see beyond the immediate as well. The coach should be always properly focused on process and not results. Results are mere snap‐shots of the process unfolding for good or bad. Results are merely information for the coach. This means the coach has a purpose not only for what he should do with the client, but for what he hopes to accomplish in doing it. As such, the effective coach instructs himself as much as he does the specific client during the unfolding of the client process of application. Having specific biases toward information or methodology can keep the coach from properly seeing all the relevant variables. And this is a big mistake, but a common one.

For example, my background is coaching physique competitors. Recently, I had a morbidly obese female hire me for coaching. I cannot let my bias influence how and why I formulate her training and diet. Yet this is what continuously unfolds in the coaching arena. It is naive to say the least. This client would not benefit from “body part” training with cardio or a competition diet. Similarly, if this same lady signed with an on‐line coach who is renowned for training triathletes, it would be just as big a mistake to put this same client under the rigors of that method of training. Her joints would not be able to take the running for long. However, both coaches should have a solid background which can inform their approach for this client. This is where the “myriad of possibilities” presents itself. The important thing is to not let the coach’s bias overtake his assessment of client’s needs for the immediate and long term.

2) The Carrot and Stick Tactic

Another common mistake for coaches in the Fitness Industry is the neophyte approach of using reward and punishment as proposed motivators to action. This is often a tactic of trainers, but it is a weak approach for coaches. The coaching relationship needs to be founded on a much more mature interactive process. The carrot/stick tactic seems like a great way to convey meaning, and motivate a client. Not true. It tends to create a power relationship where the power is not based on trust and expertise, but more a sequence of confrontations or judgements. This will never serve a coaching relationship well. For the coach as well as the client, there needs to be a foundation to the relationship.



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This foundation is on one side the coach’s expertise, and on the other side the process of client‐focus moving forward. Between the two, the coach and client establish a personal and relative and understood level of accountability and responsibility. Reward and punish has no place in a mature relationship that is based on honest interaction. To do so, creates scenarios where the client will tell the coach only what he thinks the coach ‘wants to hear’. So the carrot and stick tactic creates an environment of anticipating and provoking interaction which will influence it away from sincerity. Whether intentional or not, this cannot serve the client or the coach for very long. The carrot and stick tactic may have uses, here and there and very sporadically, but as a regular approach, it is more to do with trying to control clients. And that tactic of control is always doomed to fail. Moreover, if clients are always under some external sense of either reward or punish it creates an environment of emotional weariness over time. This is much different than the mandate that the coach is always on the side of his client and his goals, even when critique and correction is necessary. The carrot and stick tactic for client compliance does not deliver this message of client support. It confounds it. The coach is captain and coordinator. His purpose is in creating client momentum toward the client’s goals. The carrot and stick tactic does not communicate the mutuality so necessary for a positive experience for the client. The coach never wants to set up a reward/punish, approve/disapprove atmosphere within interaction with his clients. So the carrot and stick tactic used to “motivate” clients usually will have the opposite effect over time. And it is a classic but common coaching mistake.

3) Over‐Coaching

Probably THE most common coaching mistake is over‐coaching. It is especially likely among new coaches and those excessively influenced by education and accreditation over relevant experience. This type of mentality leads to several related issues. The first that comes to mind is one where the coach confuses the activity with the results. This is an erroneous assumption of causality where mere correlation exists. In terms of statistical analysis, these types of correlations are labelled as spurious. (Meaning unauthentic) And yet the information myth feeds these types of assumptions in the coaching environment on a consistent basis. Examples of this are overwhelming in the fitness industry as a whole. And this type of spurious connection of variables is often used to sell bogus products or inane services. For instance, supplement companies use spurious claims to consciously manipulate consumers. By getting people to buy their “fat burners”, the results of committed dieting are interpreted as somehow being sped up or enhanced by the consumption of the fat burner. This is on purpose, and like I said, serves to confuse the activity with the results. Some of these “Quick‐Slim” products, for example, have ultra low calories diets contained within their own packaging, along with claims, “results not typical” when models are used as ‘social proof’ of a supplement’s efficacy.



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This same mistaken mentality exists in the application of ‘cardio’ for fat loss among competitors. Inept coaches mask their lack of know‐how with a follow the leader mentality of confusing the activity with the results. The application of cardio becomes confused with the actual result of the whole process. It is the consistent application of the diet and training over time which actually induced the specified result. The “cardio” was in actuality not influential, but incidental to the desired result. My MET workshop workbook shows many studies that illustrate the futility of cardio for fat loss.

In the actual coaching environment, coaches make similar spurious connections all the time. This is often represented with an insecure coach’s need to be constantly tweaking and altering protocol. And this has less to do with the actual results of this tweaking than it does the coach’s need to feel a sense of control over protocol application. Good coaches need to relax and let the process unfold. Doing so would lead to a lot less mistakes of confusing the activity with the result. Constantly introducing new variables to a client’s regimen gives the coach less reliable assessment information. If the coach is constantly changing the client’s stimulus and protocol, then it becomes much more difficult to appropriately evaluate and assess client feedback. So the coach who constantly tweaks and changes client protocol usually confuses his activity of the tweaking and changing with the result of the process itself. This is mistaken and only reinforces the mentality for over‐coaching.

Furthermore, this mistake of over‐coaching leads naive coaches to believe that busy means productive. This is untrue on both ends of the coaching equation. A client may check in tenaciously with all types and means of information and feedback. But a coach needs to be able to distinguish between obsession and attention to detail. Obsession is not representative of progress and can often be detrimental toward it. And a coaching obsession over controlling details of client application is just as inept. Over‐coaching in this sense is an obsession of coaches who think any leeway in application on the part of the client is somehow a crack or break in the foundation of his reaching his goals. Coaches who heavily obsess over their prescribed protocol do so at the client’s expense. Too much preparation and interruption by the coach fails to acknowledge where the client is at, and how much information and instruction is too much at any given time. Hence, it is not about the protocol. This is the mistake made. It is always about the client. By example, I just witnessed a “program design course” where the requirements dictated some 18‐20 considerations involved in client assessment for program design. On the surface, this seems very detailed and informative. Yet every single one of these elements was focused in the physical realm. The “triangle of awareness” so important to effective coaching is not even remotely addressed. This over‐emphasis on preparation and therefore instruction, once again, tends to objectify the client as an individual. This doesn’t serve the client. It negates him. And this assessment over‐emphasis once again just leads to slotting clients into programs instead of relevantly leading to formulating protocol which fits



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the client. It’s imperative to halt this obvious “trainer mentality” when working within the context of the coaching relationship. Furthermore, if the coach’s role is to be that of reflection and mirror, then the coach who obsesses over details will create that same sense and atmosphere of pressure for his clients as well.

The point is as they say, “the devil is in the details”. And this is a coach killer on both sides of the equation for client, coach, and the effectiveness of their relationship. All these assessments and evaluations are almost entirely for an illustration of the appearance of knowledge. Yet, they come at the expense of time and energy. A coaching perspective is all about maintaining priorities. This means, sometimes such assessment tools are relevant, sometimes not. These things are NOT absolutes to coaching effectiveness. Not every little detail matters. The industry in its current form of information = knowledge has led to this “trainer mentality” of believing that client micromanagement is imperative. From the coaching perspective, this is an illusion. And it usually leads to over‐coaching, over‐analysis, and over‐assuming.

Instead, the operating imperative for coaching is the integrity established in the actual relationship as well as the momentum gained within the application and process of the client undertaking. It is the client’s subjective experience of protocol and the coach’s over‐sight of it that properly sets the coaching agenda. This relationship integrity must be seen and felt. It is a presence! It may not be measurable, but it is observable, and it is subject to experience. Too often this over‐emphasis on details of assessment and evaluation in the physical realm really testifies to the truth, “the devil is in the details”. More often than not, over‐emphasis on such details serves to fracture the ‘presence’ mentioned above, instead of strengthening it, which should be the goal. Once again, the coach should be reminded his goal is to work to establish client confidence and competence in their experience of protocol. Testing and measuring all the time can destroy this process since progress is seldom linear.

Over‐coaching is common and prevalent because of the overall approach of testing and measuring and trying to micromanage details. The coach needs to remind himself, the client is the priority: not the agenda, not the protocol, and not the application. The coach then needs to focus his role. As a coach, you are not a classroom, but a service‐provider. Coaching is over‐sight. It is not to over‐control, over‐whelm, or micro manage.

4) Vogueing

Because this industry is so heavily focused on teaching “information” and neglecting coaching skill; it creates the tendency for what I have labelled “vogueing” among professionals. In order to perpetuate itself, the formal models of the industry have symposiums and certification upgrades etc every single year. This leads to the mistake for newbies to focus on what’s new



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rather than what is relevant. More often than not, nothing is really “new” so much as it is newly interpreted, which is fine. But what I have witnessed, which is perplexing to say the least, is that what is new and presented as relevant often fades almost immediately. Information in the Fitness Industry has become almost “fad‐like”. Unfortunately, even when ‘what is new’ seem to have a lot of potential, wannabe coaches are endeavouring to apply the concepts well before they even have a real grasp of them. This begs the question then, how effective will this be for the client? What is new will come and go. If ‘what is new’ is truly relevant then it will have staying power and be around for a long time. It is a far better idea for coaches to use what they know well and apply it with confidence. It is better to have a working knowledge that is an inch wide and a mile deep, over the current industry illusion of acquiring information that is an inch deep but a mile wide.

Just in the past three years alone, I have witnessed the lecture circuit go from presenting “advanced” courses in the Bosu Ball to articles catering to the same demographic that have been titled “Death to the Bosu Ball”. One year the new central focus is hip and glute activation, the next year it’s “core work” and all its related buzz words. Then it is VMO activation that is all the rage, or pelvic tucking or prehab work, or corrective exercises. All of a sudden, client’s goals get reorganized and revamped. And this is not because of the actual client, but instead, it is based on some new found piece of information. This leaves those who are ‘vogueing’ bouncing back and forth to industry fads, and illustrates a true lack of real understanding of the operating principles. Following these vogue trends does not represent coaching skill, but actually it’s opposite.

It is the principles which ‘should be’ the prevalent influence of a coach’s knowledge base. What is relevant (the principles) does not come and go. Professionals susceptible to “vogueing” trends tend to be the ones who are led to believe that the applications of methodology are based in magical formulas that are somehow always changing. And this is just not true. This is not to say what is new is NOT relevant. It may be relevant. The two need not be mutually exclusive. But adapting everything new, because it is new, is a mistake. Again, the client assessment and evaluation, and the client needs and goals precede whether adapting anything new is useful or not useful in the individual client case. A perspective based on the principles is what is relevant.

And when it comes to vogueing and new information there seems to be two active tendencies of coaches. One group is quick to embrace and adapt everything new, regardless of context, relevance, or nuance. These are the “voguers”. But another group of coaches are just as likely and quick to dismiss anything new. Both tendencies are mistakes. The wise and informed coach is the coach who seeks to learn what is new and filter it through his own understanding of the



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operating principles. If the new information stands up to scrutiny, the coach will embrace the information without necessarily rushing to implement it.

5) Jargonizing

The language‐style the coach uses also needs to be addressed here. Recall that coaching must be personal, it must be practical, it must be professional and it must be proactive. This is what should inform proper coaching communication and interaction: “coach‐speak” if you will. It is up to the coach to set both the boundaries and the tone for interaction. This tone is one that must be both professional and appropriate for any given client, at any given time. The coach’s number one aim for the language he employs is to be understood. But often coaches create barriers in communication without even realizing they are doing so. In the Fitness Industry, one of the most common means to making this type of mistake is what I refer to as “jargonizing”, also known as industry‐speak. The trend is to use professional jargon as if talking with other professionals or coaches. But, more often than not, coaching clients will NOT be other Fitness professionals. To speak to clients in industry jargon can create problems in effective client communication. Too often, the coach employing industry jargon when engaging clients can seem condescending. The coach thinks he is illustrating his knowledge, but he often fails to address, “who is my client” while engaging interaction. Seldom is industry jargon necessary. And it leads to the problem of talking “at” clients rather than talking “to” them or with them. Coaching is still a relationship, and this should influence the language and style the coach employs. Just because experts use and employ jargon to talk with each other doesn’t mean it is an effective mode of communication between coach and client. By example, imagine a professional lawyer who constructs and litigates legal contracts all day long coming home from work and using the same professional jargon at home with his family as he does at work. It would be ludicrous. But this is a common tendency for coaches in the Fitness Industry. And it is a mistake. It is in fact a form of coaching blindness. Moreover, ‘jargonizing’ often becomes a tactic for coaches to retreat to when they do not have adequate answers for client questions or issues. Remember, the coach’s goal is to serve the client, not his own ego. The coach must always focus in a manner of communication that is on behalf of the client, the client’s learning, the client’s experience, and the client’s progress.

Jargonizing as a trend is a fault of the industry that is overly focused on the importance of useless information, terms and concepts. This misplaced focus on minutia often comes at the expense of developing sound communication skills and a style commensurate with being in the “service” industry. Again, the focus must be turned right side up and be client‐centred, not knowledge centred. “Jargonizing” at clients can create obvious coaching barriers. To coach effectively, speak a style and dialect of coaching “English” that is suitable for both you, as a



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coach, and the consideration of the client as well. This is the appropriate means for being personal, professional, proactive and practical. The goal is not to have a “captive” audience, but a receptive one. Being professional is not illustrated by a command of industry jargon, but rather being understood by the client. It’s important to remind coaches once again that interaction and communication is their currency of exchange: just like money. And as such, it is the exchange value that will matter most. “Jargonizing” with clients unfamiliar with the terms and phrases substantially reduces the exchange value of coaching communication.

6) Paralysis by Analysis

This can indeed be a major coach killer. Once again, this common coaching mistake stems from forgetting that the number one emphasis for coaches is not the knowledge domain but the client‐focus. Coaches who feel vulnerable will often explain too much detail for protocol process and application. It can leave a client dizzy and confused. Coaching is about being clear and concise. It is about being understood. The good and effective coach provides relative feedback the client needs, when and how he needs it. This will sometimes require explaining terms or concepts. Just as often it will not require such explication. Coaches who buy into the whole knowledge aspect of application will tend to speak at clients instead of with them. Moreover, the information myth leads many coaches to over‐analyzing every element client feedback or information. This leads coaches looking for elements of right and wrong interaction. It’s important to reemphasize that there is seldom absolute right and wrong. There are though, a myriad of possibilities. Part of the timeliness of coaching is action. Action has little to do with certainty. Certainty in coaching application is a myth. Those who look for it usually suffer this paralysis by analysis. Remember the coaching emphasis is on the process itself. This is like travelling down a busy street. Trying to anticipate when all the lights will be green ahead, just to move through the first one, is a paralysis by analysis. Action must always precede understanding and outcome. Trusting in the knowledge of the principles and confidence in the task at hand of being client‐focused are two ways to preventing a coaching paralysis by analysis.

There has been an industry trend to trying to create more and more complication to application. This just feeds the paralysis by analysis. In truth, complicated does not mean advanced. Clients usually need things simplified, not made even more complicated. The good coach is all about simplicity. For application and instruction, simple is always best regarding client interaction. The coach who focuses on what is simple and simply being understood is way ahead of the coach who ponders every move like some chess equation. The latter is not coaching. Coaching is not based on formulas and mathematical equations or even assessing statistics from clients. These things may inform the coach’s knowledge base, but they should not interfere, interrupt or needlessly insinuate themselves in the coaching relationship. As I’ve



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stated here many times doing right is more important than being right. Being right should not require emphasis in coaching interaction. A coach who constantly emphasizes ‘being right’ will at some point make the mistake of paralysis by analysis.

Paralysis by analysis also exists on the other side of the coaching equation. Clients will often observe, report, and consider all kinds of things irrelevant to the coaching process and the protocol application. This is an over analysis on the client’s part and a coach needs to address it. Keen clients can also suffer paralysis of analysis by trying to absorb and learn from other sources. This can often lead them to bouncing all their confusion off you the coach. Clients will try to learn too much too fast, and/or learn concepts well beyond their level of understanding and experience. It is up to the coach to explain to the client, the client’s own paralysis of analysis. A coach cannot notice and observe this if the coach is susceptible to it himself. Paralysis by analysis is a common coaching mistake. Almost everyone does it at some point in their career. And it is so common and often so subtle that it can easily be missed. Experience usually teaches coaches a level of intuition of whether or not they may be overanalyzing some client related issue.

7) Emotional Reactions

Coaches are people too and there are circumstances with clients that can elicit negative emotional reactions in the coach. It is foolish for any coach to pretend he is beyond emotion. So the coach must acknowledge to himself if and when his emotions have been provoked. However, reacting to such provocation is a huge mistake. Good coaching requires restraint. It’s important for the coach to remind himself to be unattached to any interactions which stir negative emotion. But the coach also needs to recognize that unattached does not mean uninvolved. In such cases and situations, the coach should focus on being professional. This serves as a means to still be effectively personal while negating potential ‘reaction’ to the client. It would be silly for a coach to deny a feeling of anger or frustration toward a client or a current interaction with a client. Coaches are human, not robots. But acting on such emotion is an entirely other issue. It is unprofessional for a coach to do so. In such situations the coach needs to remind himself that his own mandate is to be understood first. Emotional reaction is more about needing to be in control of communication and interaction. And the coach should not always need to be in control. As discussed in previous chapters, in these types of situations it can be helpful to the coach to objectively remove the message from the messenger. This helps the coach to keep the situation less personal and more focused on the message. Within the context of potential heightened or escalating emotion, it is important to be message‐centred to reduce reactive tendencies.



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Reacting to negative emotions usually only serves to heighten the emotions all around. And negative emotions, once acted upon, can create more harmful situations than the circumstances that created them to begin with. The coach is the leader in the relationship. It is the coach’s place to stop any such circumstances from gaining momentum. Maturity is a component part of the coaching anatomy. The coach can still deliver a clear message within a sensitive environment. But doing so requires diplomacy and delicate communication skills. This has nothing to do with domain knowledge or application. When negative emotions present themselves for the coach, he needs to be prepared to act professionally, not react immaturely. Things and situations are not always going to proceed without issue. Coaching is a human relationship service after all. The coach should expect there will be times where his emotions may be piqued. He needs to prepare himself as a professional for this possibility. And he needs to remind himself always that he undermines himself if he reacts emotionally to negative circumstances. Maturity is a coaching responsibility; and nowhere is this tested more than when circumstances create negative emotion in the coach. But as a coach, be prepared for these possibilities and act accordingly; act respectfully, and act professionally.

8) Walk the Talk

Coaches who do not walk their own talk will not be taken seriously for long. There are far too many overweight diet experts, and sickly‐looking ‘how to build muscle’ experts. Too many wannabe experts in the Fitness Industry have a “do as I say, not as I do” arrogant attitude. Some even get away with this. The modern internet contributes to this mistake. However, at some point it boils down to integrity. Far too many experts these days hide behind dogma of research or tradition to do their teaching. The best coaches can walk their talk; if not physically, then at least in terms of commitment, discipline, consistency and all the other characteristics they expect to model for their clients. There is far too much coaching hypocrisy in the fitness industry. It will sooner or later be exposed for what it is. Wannabe coaches need to understand that studying and learning are not the same as knowing and doing. The expression “the map is not the territory” is important here. If we look to pro sports, for instance, and examine career coaches, we can observe a similar pattern. Yes, they are students of the game. But they study and teach the game from within the game itself. They have all not only been there and done that, but are there, and still do that. This is walking the talk. This is why coaches get the respect of the players. The players respect and are motivated by those who have been where they are, but beyond their position as well. Coaches understand the game beyond the talent level of the players and their positions. The same should be true for Coaches in the fitness industry. It is not a matter that a coach “can” get away with not being someone who can walk their talk. It is a matter, instead, of integrity. Books titled “Huge in a Hurry” and articles along the same vein,



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should have some kernel of truth from the author himself, if the claims are going to be so grand. Coaching is a relationship. As such, it should be beyond marketing manipulation. Coaches are people who model their own behaviour. Integrity to following their own instruction is the highest form of competency. Coaches in professional realms have earned respect from decades of in the trenches activity and experience. They have, as the saying goes, “got their hands dirty” and have earned their stripes. This does not mean a coach in the fitness industry has to have had a background of championship trophies. But it does mean he practices the same disciplined lifestyle to which he prescribes to so many others. And it also means he cannot become a worthy coach by attending symposiums and updating his accreditations. This is by comparison, keeping the hands clean, from the real work. And it’s the real work that leads to relevant experience which can be passed along to clients. One of the most common mistakes in the fitness industry is that so many aspire to the leadership role of coach. But they cannot “walk the talk” of their profession. Expecting clients to follow advice the coach does not follow himself is foolish. It should be obvious to anyone when a coach is one who walks his talk.


• Make a list of these 8 common coaching mistakes. Which ones are you most prone to and why? How can you overcome implementing these mistakes?

• What tactics can you use as insurance against employing the mistakes you seem most prone to?



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SECTION 3

About the Client



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Chapter 12 Where to Start?

Thus far we have been addressing the concept of coaching in the fitness industry in a direct format. We have addressed the lack of any real discussion in the fitness industry as to what coaching and on‐line coaching even is. Most people and experts are satisfied to use the term trainer and coach interchangeably. It should be understood by now that the two roles are worlds apart, especially qualitatively. To this end, up to now, we have been exploring what coaching really is, and what the coaching role and skill set entails.

We have effectively asked and answered, both “who is the coach?” and “how is the coach?” Because the client is so interwoven into that discussion, “the client” consideration has thus far been brought along in reference to understanding the coach’s role and the coaching relationship. But now section 3 of this project needs to delve a little deeper. The industry has ignored the distinction between coach and client. The industry has also quantified clients in terms of a general clientele. One thing we know about coaching is that everyone is certainly different. Even though two clients may receive the same protocol of exercise program or even diet; how they respond will be unique to each person as an individual. This is true physically, physiologically, but also true in terms of discipline, consistency, enthusiasm and stress. So up to now, I have written to try to lay bare all the critical elements important to understanding the concept of “coach” in complete terms and detail. And as much as this delineation included discussion of the client, it was in terms of enlightening the theme of coach. This section now does the reverse. Competent coaching is all about understanding the client as an individual and moving forward “with” the client from that vantage point. It is the coach who must be flexible and amenable; not the client. This much has already been established. So section 3 is now “all about the client” and chapter 12 starts at the beginning. As a coach, “where do I start?”

In one word ‐preparation. Effective coaching is all about mandating being prepared. And indeed a part of being prepared is having a rudimentary understanding of the operating principles of training and diet. But coaches must adequately also prepare for the clients as well. Having knowledge of training and diet is good, but limited. If it stops there, then coaching becomes the classic mistake of thinking that coaching is something you do “to” the client; but as I’ve already illustrated, effective coaching is something you do “with” the client. Coaches must prepare themselves for both the predictable and the unpredictable aspects of dealing with people within an ongoing structured relationship. (Since that is what coaching really is.) Preparation begins then by starting and keeping a client‐file that involves not just a physical assessment of needs, but the coach’s qualitative observations as well. This is something I inherited from social work.



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In social work, each “client” had a file for staff members to refer to, which supply a synopsis of the client’s case and situation. Then, the file would also summarize the client’s ongoing interaction, demeanour, behaviour, and mental and emotional capacities. Basically, anything that had an effect on the client profile, case and situation was included in file notes. And this kind of file keeping was also essential for staff to know subtle and obvious differences in clientele. One client may be prone to violent outbursts; another may be verbally abusive etc.

Client file keeping serves the coach in the fitness industry as well. Every individual, even ones with the same goals will respond differently to coaching and to protocol. The fitness industry even acknowledges this. But at the same time the industry seems to completely avoid this reality of individuality as well. The question then begs for effective coaching; how can a coach effectively do his job with a client if so much of the equation of who that client is, is just neglected as irrelevant? The client, as a person, is not only a relevant consideration, but perhaps the most relevant one. Preparing a client’s file that contains more than vital stats makes all the difference in ‘how to’ coach the client with the kind of attention they will respond to best.

One benefit of keeping a file is that as coach, you will be the only one viewing the file. This is a lot like a psychiatrist and a patient in terms of file keeping. It can also be a good idea to make a general template for keeping client files, for quick access. I employ the “triangle of awareness” discussed in previous chapters. I make headings for physical, emotional, and mental frames. From there I assess things like client’s current industry knowledge; are client’s goals are realistic; client’s communication skills and style, etc. This prepares me for my ongoing interaction with the client as an individual. I need to not only be prepared in terms of what to expect, but I can also know when the client is making real progress based on my own file keeping and not some silly and arbitrary physical testing. Keeping a client file is not a means to judgement of a client, but a qualitative assessment and evaluation tool. Remember coaching is a relationship. It is more qualitative and communicative and interactive in nature than it is physical prescription. Therefore, formulating a client file is part of client preparation and current and ongoing assessment as well. It is an invaluable tool in the process of coaching. But it must go beyond just recording programs and diets.

The nature of file keeping must reflect the nature of coaching as well. It must be personal, it must be practical, it must professional and it must be proactive. But personal means it must be personal in terms of the client and his relationship to your role as coach. It is not personal in terms of other relationships by comparison. File keeping that reflects the coach’s personal input leads to generalizations that may not serve the relationship well. Generalizations we make as individuals with friends and family are not appropriate in the coach/client relationship or its file maintenance. These types of generalizations based on the person and not the application of



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behaviour within the coaching relationship will eventually erode a coach’s ability to appropriately influence, motivate, inspire, or sustain that particular client. This is why, for example, in the professional service industries, doctors do not treat family. Anyone in the Fitness Industry who has tried to coach a friend or a family member eventually hits a brick wall because the relationship begins from an intimate place, not a professional one. Therefore, keeping a client file even though you as coach are the only one who sees it, still must maintain this level of professional distance. And this is precisely so it can be “personal” but not so intimate as to create biases of perception. This is very important for a coach to acknowledge. So for instance, a client file may have something like the following within it:

“Jane Doe really seems to want and need physical transformation. She has been overweight and depressed for a long time. She seems committed, yet has never achieved her goal. It may be difficult to get her to understand that being overweight for her is really a symbol of something else going on. She is not depressed because she is overweight. She is overweight because she is depressed.”

Notice this file entry is not judgmental but is instead evaluative. This is personal, professional, practical and proactive. The “incorrect” personal kind of file keeping is one that is personal because it reflects the coach injecting his own opinion and bias into the file like many do when generalizing about friends or family. The same example is illustrated below as the wrong kind of file keeping:

“Jane Doe hires me to help her lose weight and be happy with herself. Yet, she has admittedly failed at every diet and every program and coach she has ever tried. Has she not considered that “she” is the problem, and that she has failed these programs, these programs have not failed her? I’ll try to help her for a while, but I am not going to listen to more excuses. If she starts wasting my time, I’ll just end the relationship. I don’t have time for people who continue to pretend to be serious when their results show they are anything but serious.”

Notice this latter file entry has a lot of generalizations from the coach attached to it. This biases the coach in a personal way, not on behalf of the client, but in suspicion of the client. In this example, the coach has pretty much injected his own expectations into the file, and therefore, into the relationship. This is totally unfair to the client. The coach also makes it about himself in this example; when the first example is ‘about the client’. So keeping a file that is “personal” means it must be professionally personal. If this cannot be established, the coach should not engage the relationship further.



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Understanding Motivation

Clients and potential clients will often enter into the coaching relationship by claiming the initial appeal of personal coaching services is all about “motivation” for them. Many coaches are flattered by a statement that the client “needs him” for motivation. Wrong! But first things first. Right away, the aware coach should note where the client’s stated need for motivation lies in the triangle of awareness. Notice that motivation has little to do with physical training protocol or diet. Motivation is a mental/emotional construct. A client, who claims motivation as one of the central reasons for procuring the coaching service, is a client looking for the wrong thing in the wrong place. While a coach can indeed provide motivation to the client; it should be part of the ongoing interaction and relationship. Motivation should never be a means to achieve or elicit client compliance to consistency of application of prescribed protocol. Situational motivation may be a type of motivation employed by trainers, but it is unproductive in the long‐term coaching relationship. People who want to initiate coaching with a stated need for motivation are asking for advanced cheerleading at the very least. Anyone who needs consistent motivational coaching will not endure for long in real terms anyway; regardless of coach’s motivational tactics. Physique transformation of any kind when broken down to its core is all about personal growth. The motivation for that personal growth as well as sustaining that motivation must come from and grow within the client himself. This is not something a coach lends or gives to the prospective client. So, from the outset, any client claiming to need motivation from coaching should serve as a flag sign to the aware coach.

But then, how would motivation take hold within the process and relationship of coaching? How does motivation become about the client, but within the coaching relationship? The answer is all about building client momentum. The coach can be catalyst or crusher of client momentum. The coach must pay due attention to this and make client momentum a serviceable goal to accomplish. Remember the importance of the triangle of awareness within the relationship focus and within the client file emphasis as well. Within the coaching relationship, the client must have an outlet and safe means for expressing feelings, attitudes and sentiments. The vital aspects of coaching are not limited to simple application and feedback of protocol. To serve a client motivation, the interactive nature of coaching must be non‐threatening and non‐intimidating. And this is especially true regarding mental and emotional feedback from a client. All clients will express themselves in different ways. This should be encouraged, not negated. The coach’s goal is never to create training robots, but rather to engage client expression as a means to personal growth. Without this rich coaching environment, you are not a coach, but a trainer at best. And people in need of finding their own motivation will not last long with such a limited “trainer mentality” as their guiding influence.

By working from the client’s file, the aware coach will implement client‐specific methods and means of interaction well beyond prescribed protocol. The coach helps to forge the path for the



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client to more clearly delineate their goals in their own terms and understanding. The aware coach serves the clients in their own experience within the process of applying protocol. The goal of the coach is well beyond that of the trainer. The coach must facilitate the engagement of the clients to be able to seize and apply protocol in a way that shapes and enhances their own experience. To do this efficiently the coach should take advantage of the client’s existing skills within the application process. And these skills can be in either realm of physical, mental, emotional. One client may be organized and motivated, but lack physical conditioning. Another client may have a stressful and hectic lifestyle, but is disciplined and committed. Another client may have physical gifts he is not aware of, but is inconsistent in application. The coach must file and emphasize a client’s strengths, isolate these strengths to whatever angle of the triangle they belong. (physical, mental, emotional) And while the coach engages and works to these strengths, he can also seek to develop new ones as well. The coach nudges the client ahead by working and emphasizing whatever skill set the client presents. It’s not about the coach’s expectations. It is entirely about the client’s current abilities and undiscovered potential. This is the means by which the coach serves as “guiding light”. As that light, the coach’s goal should be to focus and notice and take advantage of any opportunities that let the client shine. These are usually “moments” that cannot be prescribed in protocol nor dictated as expectation either. These moments often occur spontaneously, and a great coach is aware enough to capitalize on these opportunities on behalf of the client. Then the coach can genuinely reward the client for “shining” in ways the client may be unaware of. The less experienced the client, the less likely he is to even realize his own significant breakthrough. This is especially true when such breakthroughs have nothing to do with percent body fat or anthropometric measurements etc. A client and coach focus on absolute end results only, will result in failure eventually. This is why the coach must always make notes in the client’s file of any significant client breakthrough. Since all physique goals truly boil down to a desire for personal growth, the coach who recognizes and exercises this reality, is a coach who realizes there is a lot more to the job than the actual job. So the coach builds motivation by guiding the client to a process to finding that motivation within himself.

Each client must be evaluated and assessed on an individual, personal, and subjective level. This tends to be the exact opposite of what industry dictates. In the coaching realm, this lack of specificity represents just another failure of the industry, often direct, and just as often by neglect. Within each client’s file, the coach should make a heading and acknowledge “reasonable expectations” for each client. This type of heading once again makes it all about the client. Within this personal postulation of reasonable expectations, the coach can act and interact fairly and subjectively while still sustaining a desired direction. And the only way to formulate reasonable expectations is for the coach to immediately focus on the client’s presented strengths; not his weaknesses. A focus on a client’s strengths has a positive influence on the client. And reasonable expectations from this working attitude are easier for the coach



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to foster and for the client to embrace. Once momentum is gathered in this way, clients will tend to work on weaknesses on their own. This is a much more empowering mindset for the client to adapt and nurture than is mere dictation of protocol.

And by comparison, constantly reminding a client of what they cannot do, or focusing on their weaknesses only increases negative energy in the coaching relationship. And as a tactic, this can also crush the coach’s goal of building client competence and confidence moving forward. The coach should always recognize that if his agenda does not serve the client, then it does not serve the relationship either.

And yet the industry suggests that many or all variables of progress are universal, common, and quantitative. This is mistaken. And it is not reasonable. One size does not fit all. Being able to do a chin up or a specific number of chin ups is not a qualitative evaluation tool in coaching. (Whether it is for a trainer is another separate issue.) Clients should be given challenges they can reach and attain, not arbitrary standards that do not take into account vital stats, anatomical leverage, experience etc. Such arbitrary fitness standards do not measure true progress. Peak performance will vary from one client’s talents, abilities, and genetics to another. These are not comparatives. The aware coach should design programs and assign diets that are themselves modes of testing. The workout can be the test, and the test can be the workout. Mastery of the program for any client is truly a reasonable expectation instead of an arbitrary standard.

Reasonable Expectations in Corrective Situations

Not all aspects of coaching or client application will be just smooth sailing from working to a client’s strengths. Coaching is a relationship. It is also an ongoing process. There will be problems, issues, and need for coaching intervention in terms of correction and critique. But it must always be about the client. A common coaching mistake is forgetting the client emphasis. Too often coaches try to correct clients by assuming the client “won’t” initiate change when the fact is the client “can’t” initiate change and is afraid to say so. (And a client being afraid to share anything is a consequence that lies squarely on the shoulders of the coach.) The point is that the coach can instruct, illustrate by example, offer incentives for performance etc; but if a client simply cannot ‘do’ what is expected, then it is the coach’s assumption that is faulty. It’s not the client that needs ‘correction’ in this example but the coach.

Instruction is useless when it is based in assumptions of performance. For instance, a coach can show me, tell me, illustrate to me, and even perform in front of me back flips all day long. And the instruction and expectations for me to do so doesn’t help me if I simple cannot do it. And yet we see these arbitrary expectations all through the industry. Certain programs dictate a



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person should be able to increase a percentage of their 1RM max weekly, or they should work to be able to do so many chin ups, or to be able to perform a pistol squat etc. All or most of this is nonsense. I once had a trainee contact me in desperation. He was reading an article that “dictated” he should be able to do so many chin ups as an illustration of balanced upper body strength. He could only do one at the current time. I asked him if he was in a sport that required any form or type of movement pulling similar to the chin up. No. And when he did chins, he felt pain in his shoulder and biceps tendon. Yet he was desperate because of this certification article to ‘improve his chins’. He wasn’t in need of “correction”. He was in need of direction. Whether he could do one chin up or 100 had no real bearing on his own self‐improvement. It is naive of the fitness industry to assume so, and deceitful to expect so. Again, start with what the client can do in terms of ability, and create challenge and compliance from there. If the client cannot do a chin up, any client can do a pulldown.

The above scenario is a common occurrence. Industry dictates change each year and everyone scrambles to adapt them without the rational question whether such dictates are relevant to their client’s situation. This is especially true for the coach. The above chin‐up scenario made an otherwise rational trainee, desperate and irrational. And the chin up became an exercise of intimidation rather than challenge. This does not serve the trainee or the coach. Moreover, coaching itself can be an intimidating environment for trainees, even unconsciously. Reasonable expectations must also include the coach’s approach to corrective and critical situations. It’s important for the coach to always be proactive in communication. The coach needs to control as much as possible, not create an environment of client reaction; especially one like the example of desperation above. When specific critique and corrective instruction are necessary, they must be properly contextually placed. Even though all interaction is client‐centred; problematic issues must focus on the action required and the mistake being made, not on the client. It is not a matter of client‐character that requires correcting. It is quite possibly the implementation of certain behaviour or thinking that requires correction. In the above example, the trainee needed to be educated to focus on what is relevant, not what is fashionable. His goals had nothing to do with his ability to perform chin ups. Therefore, it was irrelevant. What required correction wasn’t a program for better chin up performance; but rather an understanding of relevance and practicality.

In situations which require ongoing correction and critique, it can indeed be as much about the client character as well as the behaviour that requires correcting. I work this example many times per year with clients who come to me with eating disorders of varying types and degree. They mistakenly first want to hire me for a diet, yet fail to understand their eating disorder is not solved or appropriated by yet another diet. It is not a diet issue. But solving this requires correction and critique in an ongoing basis. In such situations (and there are many) it is best if the coach can alter himself to fit the client within the interaction; rather than adding another



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expectation on the client. (Which would be to expect the client to be able to adapt to the coach’s style of discourse.) Remember, whether in corrective situations and circumstances or not, the accentuation for the coach must be on reasonable expectations, and be about the client. Dictating correction and critique without dialogue can just exacerbate a tendency for client intimidation and/or knee jerk reaction. This doesn’t help the client, but tends to create defensiveness in him. The client will often be doing his best, but simply doesn’t know any better. Everyone falls back to positions they know and are secure in, whether these positions serve them or not. The coach, who just barks solutions and expects the client to self‐remedy, is a lazy and ineffectual coach. It is up to the coach to lead the way, show the way, be the way. This is the modelling discussed in previous chapters. This is the means by which coach is also the true guiding light. It is not enough for the coach to just notice, observe, and point out mistakes and just leave it at that. To be effective in client corrective situations and circumstances, the coach should narrow the focus on specific client actions or non‐actions, the consequences of such actions; and then an explanation of how and why these mistakes need changing. The coach is an active part of the process, not a bystander to its observance merely offering commentary. This may require some advanced coaching experience and skill, but it is becoming increasingly needed in the world of the on‐line coach, regardless of industry.

Situations requiring correction, critique and instruction also require coaching sophistication and nuance. The coach is careful to avoid assuming too much about what a client does or does not know, or what a client’s capabilities and understanding may be. (Although these become much clearer to a coach as the relationship progresses.) If a coach merely assumes the client ‘should be able’ to correct what is wrong, this assumption can surely lead to ineffective communication on both sides of the coaching interaction. As such, the opportunity for client learning and growth can be greatly diminished, instead of any corrections taking place. Treading lightly, for the coach, is good advice at this early stage in the coaching relationship or in corrective situations.

This nuance should not be overlooked. Coaching is a relationship, yes, but it is a power‐oriented relationship. The coach is the leader and the client wants to acquire the coach’s recognition and approval on top of his input. When correction/critique is involved, the coach needs to be cognizant of this element of the relationship. Correction and critique has nothing to do with blame or punishment. A client who senses either or both needs reassurance this is not the case. The coach must focus on the tone of interaction in such situations. He must motivate the clients to embrace correction, not embarrass them to do so. Because of the power nature of the relationship, the aware coach needs to know that showing concern for the client in corrective situations is often enough to get them moving forward. This has everything to do with strategies and tactics of communication (see previous chapters) and less to do with the actual situation which needs correcting. This is what I refer to as “interactive diplomacy” in the



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coaching environment. Solutions to corrective situations need to offer direction, not judgement. The coach offers direction that is meaningful but less personal. The focus for correction is more toward the corrective process involved; not the client and not the coach. This is the type of coaching sophistication and nuance involved in knowing how to make a situation more personal and motivating, by removing the personal elements from the corrective situation.

However, some behavioural issues that require correcting do not stem from the physical application realm. Sometimes the road blocks to consistency or progress are more mental and emotional than physical. Coaching the person, not the program, should allow for the coach to gain insight into problems that can stem beyond application issues. Certain client demeanours and attitudes will present themselves to the coach. Evaluation and assessment can take on more qualitative emphasis and often should. “Measuring” can be a faulty application tool at this point. For example, clients with eating disorders should not be assessed by the weight scale. The weight scale means something different to this type of client than it does for the coach. And the coach must acknowledge these things. Coaching awareness allows the coach to make working assumptions as long as he keeps them to himself. Coaching in the mental and emotional focuses means assessments and evaluations are more effective than ‘measuring’.

Coaches must always remember that most people are resistant to change. Since coaching is knowing about the client, coaches need to acknowledge most people hold on to their own assumptions as facts. At some point in the coaching process, clients will be resistant to necessary change. A good coach must lead clients to finding for themselves where their own perceptions were false. Lecturing the clients on these subjects risks creating distance between coach and client or worse. “Unlearning” can be the hardest part of learning for a client. A good coach cannot just always dictate protocol and instruction and leave it at that. Guiding the client in these mental corrective situations which require client unlearning demand the coach employ the tactics and strategies of coaching discussed in earlier chapters. The coach must serve ‘as part’ of the client unlearning process as it may be required. Changing a habit or false perception requires repeated efforts of the same message over and over again; albeit the message can take many forms. While this can be frustrating for the coach, the focus must remain about the client.

A good coach shouldn’t just expect “correction” merely because he instructs an expectation for it to be so. A client isn’t going to “get it” instantly just because you tell them to. And it is normal and human for clients to stagnate, regress, and even be intimidated by trying to change current thinking patterns; even ones which may be sabotaging their own progress. Changing any kind of behaviour, physical or mental can feel awkward to a client merely because it is different for them. This is not unusual. Most people simply resist change. Ironically, they may resist the



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exact change they set out to accomplish. The Fitness Industry is a good representation of this. Long term change is so often unsustainable by clients of the fitness industry. They tend to revert back to what they know diet and lifestyle wise. This is because no real coaching, no real guiding light, has been provided to them to correct faulty thinking. Many of them maintain adherence to a program or a diet for a while, but eventually return to former habits. The trainer mentality applied to the clients has not corrected or coached a change in client mindset. This until now represents a failure of coaching across the industry. The coach cannot force this type of corrective thinking on the client. The coach must guide and present alternatives while still allowing the client to establish his own changes in a comfortable pace. Results for corrective instruction are never linear. The goal of the coach is to keep the client focused and concentrating on these elements of change, often without him even being aware of it. The coach tries to guide forward to corrective thinking so as to prevent the client from falling back into previous patterns and habits that are destructive or stagnating.

Clients and new clients present and begin with many singular issues of their own. There are actually many common elements of client issues that present themselves. There are too many to discuss for the purposes of this book. But one of the most common elements is a fear of intimidation of the coach. People trying to better themselves in a certain area often feel vulnerable and conspicuous. Combine this desire for improvement with the cosmetic elements of body image and fitness and it’s easy to understand how and why the coaching environment can be so intimidating for clients and potential clients. Moreover, a coach with a reputation for being really good can intensify that sense of client intimidation. One the one hand, the client has heard of you and your expertise and that is why he wants the best help. But on the other hand, your reputation as being so good reinforces to the client their own lack of self‐esteem. This need not even be a conscious acknowledgement, but it is often present in the beginnings of the coaching relationship. Client intimidation of the power structure of the relationship is an issue about the client which an aware coach needs to deal with.

I often receive inquiries from people asking me if I deal with “regular” people or “someone like me”. The question itself reflects a level of client intimidation. Too many coaches revel in this sense of perceived power in the relationship. But this is not power; it is in actuality a responsibility on the coach. The coach who embraces the status element of power in the relationship is already setting a very weak position for moving forward. Adults will not want to feel like obligated children for long. The aware coach needs to realize that this initial client intimidation can take many forms; such as ‘honeymooning’ (discussed in my book, The Abel Approach), excessive deference to the coach’s authority, reacting to coaching instruction defensively, and perceiving or reading connotations into the coaching interaction that are just not there. (Hence another reason that communication must be clear and concise as argued in previous chapters.) An intimidated client will often infer that a coach is implying something



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other than the actual message. Another type of illustration of client issues is how some clients may interact aggressively or too personally for what is appropriate in a coaching environment. These are all off‐shoots of clients negotiating their own fear and intimidation of the power structure in the coaching relationship. Passive resistance and acceptance can take many forms within the coaching relationship, particularly at the beginning.

Confounding this modern internet on‐line coaching environment is that now, the reality is many clients will also seek you out as a coach after previous coaching relationships that were not positive experiences. (This represents how fast the industry on the internet is changing and establishing itself.)

Bad or unrewarding previous coaching experiences can effect the client well after the situation has expired. The new coach needs to realize this can effect the new relationship as well. The aware coach must not indulge or assess too much of the client’s previous coaching experience. This will not help form an accurate opinion or position with the client. No matter how thinly something is sliced, it has two sides. Whatever the client has to say about a previous coaching experience should only be taken at face value. Like anything else, if you weren’t there, then you don’t know. A one‐sided version of past scenarios that led the client to you is more or less irrelevant. Indulge the client in how they got to you, and understand the previous coaching relationship only in so much as it informs you about the client. The former coach and the client’s experience with him is irrelevant. Leave it in the past and focus on what is relevant. The client’s previous experience ‘may be’ relevant if it leads to self‐doubt, distrust, or misconceptions regarding your role as a coach. These are things that matter. You, offering an opinion of the previous coach or situation is not helpful. Refocus on the present. Refocus on the protocol at hand. Notice that a previous bad experience or unfruitful experience with a previous coach can be just as easily substituted with any personal past failed situation which brings the client to you. (For example, many clients come to me after a messy divorce or separation, and want to finally focus on themselves. So it is just as tempting for them to inject the story of the relationship into the coaching realm.)

For the coach, the best way to rid the client of a past bad experience is to get them invigorated and passionately involved in the new one. The coach engages the client, by engaging the process. For you as the coach, the past experience of the client is not part of the equation. The coach can only acknowledge that the previous situation may cloud the client’s current perception of you as coach. It is not on you the coach to get the client to abandon carrying around negative baggage and experience. The clients must be willing to leave the past in the past where it belongs. But many cannot or will not. No matter. As a coach, you must proceed to the job at hand. The coach is guide, to be sure, but it is also reasonable for the coach to expect clients to meet him half‐way in their desire to move on. (We will discuss this further in the



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chapter as well.) Here is where and how the coach can serve as “model” to the client as well. If you as the coach move on from the client’s desire to engage past experience, the client will more than likely follow suit as well, if he believes in you. The point is ‐ the coach must lead the direction by example.

In all these above scenarios, the point is the client comes to the coach always with some “issues”. They may be minor, they may be major, but they often insinuate themselves into the coaching relationship. In all these situations and potentials, the one thing the coach needs to focus on most is his own awareness. He needs to focus also on the way and means by which he presents himself within the relationship as well. Client issues mean knowing about the client! There are things about client’s personalities that are not changeable or coachable, but can still impact the long term results of the coaching relationship. The coach must first, last, and always focus on and affect the things he can; and learn to understand the client issues that are beyond his influence. The coach cannot be everything to a client, and nor should he want to be, ever. What the coach can do is, if and when the situation presents itself, the coach can involve the client in their own self‐assessment. But this can only be done according to the client’s current level of ability. The coach should never underestimate the need for a client to be their own victim. The aware coach guards against creating or enabling victim status or any negative impact mindsets. Aware coaches must make full use of the triangle of awareness, and be able to indentify within it where a client’s issues reside.

And within all the above elements and aspects of dealing with issues that necessitate knowing about the client, it is the coach’s leadership that must set the standards. These standards are the standards for coaches to use and understand and properly apply. These standards set in motion the most important elements of the coaching relationship, client accountability and responsibility.

Client Accountability and Responsibility

Effective coaching means attaching responsibility where it belongs, on the client. Clients must take responsibility, invest in accountability and be willing to take the initiative in action and interaction. A good coach demands reality checks. As an ongoing process, this will improve a client’s commitment to themselves and their goals in ways and means far beyond what any seminar, symposium, pep talk, or self‐help book ever can. When the client chooses coaching, he chooses accountability. As the mirror, the accountability to the coach is really an accountability reflected back on to the client. For many it will be the first time they have been truly honest about being accountable. And this accountability to the program and the process will serve them far greater than new exercises, fancy programs or more “information”. This qualitative



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element of coaching is vital and key to the process yet never discussed and understood except, it seems, in high level competitive athletics and the corporate world. Yet client accountability and responsibility is just as pertinent in the coach client relationship in the Fitness Industry.

The coach reinforces the process as it goes and his feedback should then reinforce the client’s commitment to that process as well. (This is how momentum is built and sustained.) The coach helps the client keep their eyes on the ball, so to speak. By being accountable to the coach, the trainee is more likely to stay in awareness of the process where he otherwise may get distracted or dissuaded. A goal is a very easy thing for a client to conceive. New Year’s resolutions have people declaring goals each and every year. And it’s one thing to conceive and imagine a goal, it’s quite another thing to remain invigorated and committed to it during the process of work required to achieve it. While it’s the responsibility of the client to maintain the enthusiasm and focus required to achieve their goals; the coach’s role in mirroring and nurturing this responsibility is a coaching imperative. It is the building of these elements of responsibility and accountability of the client that forges, deepens, and develops their confidence and competence as well. The goal for the coach is to engage clients to embrace that application of protocol, should have consistent and understood levels of commitment and expected results. This doesn’t have anything to do with % of body fat or calorie counting. It has everything to do with client accountability and responsibility. By example, if a client is given a 5 days program, then it is expected the client will follow the program and implement it 5 days per week as prescribed. This should not be something that requires a coach’s evaluation. The client responsibility should be assumed at this point. The coach sets the tone as to the client’s responsibilities. And the client becomes accountable within the feedback of taking on the responsibility of working the process toward reaching his goals.

The coach’s leadership acquaints and enforces to clients that it is their actions that count. Modern culture has led to an almost cultish expectation that “other people” solve issues for them, or take care of issues for them. This is not the coach’s role at all. The coach, who abides in this misrepresentation of his job, will create more and more an “excuses” mentality for the client. This kind of role playing can certainly serve a coach’s ego, but it thwarts the desired client responsibility and accountability for their own actions and application. Many clients will come to coaches in the fitness industry with no real background of true applied discipline and commitment to something over the long term. If need be, the coach will have to coach client action and awareness. The goal is always to nurture the client’s own embracing of responsibility and accountability in his role to take the action required to meet and sustain his goals. The coach does this by implicitly coaching the client to be accountable and responsible to the coaching relationship first and foremost. This process can require a great deal of coaching patience within the process as well.



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But the coach must be flexible enough to let people learn and apply and develop at their own pace. The coach will get a feel for that pace and alter his expectations accordingly. The client needs to develop a sense of satisfaction from and during his own process. The client’s experience is everything. It is what fosters the client responsibility and accountability. It is what fosters client competence and confidence. The client develops the sense that the process is his alone to master, own and contribute to. The coach needs to learn when to stand out of the way while encouraging the client in that process. As discussed earlier, helicopter coaches are disempowering to a client’s mastery of process. And coaches who always insinuate themselves into the client’s process send a mixed message regarding client responsibility and accountability. The coach wants to build the client sense of accountability and responsibility. This is one element of coaching in the Fitness Industry which differs from the professional worlds of athletics or corporate structure. Clients “hire” coaches in the fitness industry. Clients are not “subject” to coaches as in other industries such as professional athletics. Moreover most, if not all Fitness Coaching clients, will not be earning a living from their fitness endeavour. So the sense of pressure and absolutes need not be part of the fitness coach’s approach to client accountability and responsibility. And clients themselves may lack the requisite understanding as to the required discipline and commitment required of them to meet and sustain their fitness goals. The coach needs to realize all of this. It means “knowing about the client”.

From the beginning, the coach must evaluate how much accountability the client needs, balanced against how much responsibility the client can handle. For instance, high level competitors in the physique world will more than likely have a more clear idea of how accountable they need to be to the coach and the process. And they can usually handle a little more responsibility without coaching interference. But by contrast, the working housewife who has never been coached in anything may not have any idea of what type or intensity of accountability is involved with coaching. She may not be able to handle too much individual responsibility either early in the relationship. For example, for the high level competitor I may just dictate a certain calories level and macro proportion for their diet and let them work out the actual meal to meal diet themselves. For the housewife who has never had a coach, I would give an exact and detailed diet. This goes back to the previous discussion regarding knowing when and how to include a client in his/her own process and within his/her own self‐assessment. Client empowerment is a delicate balance of timing with client responsibility and accountability being the central focus.



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Character Types and Personality Traits

Addressing character types and personality traits are tools for very advanced and experienced coaches. The more experience a coach has, the better he is at qualitatively evaluating various personality types. And the more volume of clientele the coach must deal with, the greater this tool of evaluation becomes as part of the coach’s assessment arsenal. Since this chapter’s focus knows about the client, the question begs, are there “types” and “sub‐types” of clients in the fitness industry. I submit the answer is a resounding yes. And while it may not be politically correct to say so, knowing these types and identifying them can really add to the coach’s ability to coach effectively.

In the fitness industry where coaching is employed, there are various types of prevailing mindsets. Knowing certain people think a specific way about their fitness endeavour can be an excellent resource for coaches. For instance, MMA trainees and wannabe fighters have a specific mindset as do competitive bodybuilders and Figure competitors. (This one is outlined in my book, The Other Side of the Mirror.) There is also a typical mindset led by the media and internet who buy into the infomercial mentality of gimmicks and promises. They believe there are short cuts, secrets, and magic potions that lead them to their goals. And the marketers are happy to capitalize on this mentality. As an offshoot of this type of mindset, there are those with the supplement mentality who “buy into” the ideas perpetrated by supplement hucksters at every level. And of course, there are professional people who hire the coach because they value their time and want to do things right; and they understand the need for a plan they can follow because the rest of their lives is so full of other distractions. All these groups and subgroups will think and process information from your coaching in a specific way. The wise coach can use this to his advantage on behalf of his client.

As an example, I will illustrate the thinking pattern of those with the supplement mentality. This group represents the truly uninitiated consumers in the Fitness Industry. They tend to be younger and impulsive. They make easy targets for marketing scams of both supplements and expertise. These are the people with industry ADD. They are not likely to stay with a coach for very long. They are the types that are more likely to read long ad copy on a coach’s website and buy into promises of fast results etc. They are not ‘seekers’ who know or understand the process of fitness. They search and believe in products promoted to them which cater to their mentality of minimal time with minimal efforts. They are totally ends‐ oriented and usually caught up in the idea of Body Image more so than any true fitness pursuit. Marketers market specifically to this target demographic. (Showing clearly that they also recognize the mindset at this level as well.) Marketers use buzzwords like “cheap” “fast” “easy” or more direct and specific target buzzwords like “jacked” “ripped” “freaky”. Marketers will splash these enticements with some science and pseudo‐science to add to their appeal to this mindset. There are many coaches now in the Fitness industry who solely cater to this mindset. There are



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even now symposiums and conferences for internet marketing on how to specifically manipulate this mindset of the Fitness consumer. The ‘real’ coach must be cognizant that many clients will lack the essential communication and interaction skills to effectively receive real coaching. And this is about the client and the client mentality. Many clients and potential clients have their consumer mentality catered/marketed to at every level. Clients from this mentality may not be able to differentiate between internet marketing hype and actual and effective applied coaching expertise. And this is regardless of how effective the coach is in actuality. This is a consumer mindset. And this mindset tends to seek expertise and service further down the line well after exhausting buying products to reach their goals.

For this group with this mindset, coaching can be problematic. As an example, this merely illustrates that there will be times when coaching will not come naturally to either the coach or the client; or a specific coach with a specific client. There are no one size fits all approaches to coaching. Everyone comes to the coach from his/her own unique background of experience, education, sophistication, and perspective. The previous example illustrates that knowing the various categories of industry consumer mindsets can go a long way to helping the coach understand his client; perhaps better than they understand themselves. For example, I had a recent client inquiry along the following lines. The potential‐client was following a popular internet “expert” program to get “freaky naturally”. (Right away this is an indicator to me as a coach.) The client also ‘supplements’ the training program with all the products from this expert, ranging from herbs to even water, protein powder, enzymes etc. The prospective client was investing about $500 per month (minimum) on these supplements. He wanted a “diet” from me which was vegetarian, raw food only. His vital stats were that he is 6 ft 2in, and weighs 150 lbs. His goal, from “my diet” would be that he not feel full, that he use the other “experts” powders for his protein, but his goal was to gain 40 lbs of muscle. Then he added in capital and bold italics, “WITH ABSOLUTELY NO FAT”. With all this information, I could easily access and evaluate this client in terms of “mentality”. (And you should be able to do so in such an obvious example as well.) I could have easily taken his money. I instead refunded his credit card and simply stated I did not think that I could help him to reach his goals. I knew that should I take him on as a client, we would be speaking a different language, and that ‘coaching’ was not really what this person was seeking. This is how to use categories to help guide “knowing about the client”.

Contrast the above consumer mentality with say a professional hockey or football player who seeks off‐season coaching guidance for fitness. This mentality is much different. More than likely this type of client has had coaching for years, and understands and respects the process. He also, more than likely, spends time seeking out appropriate and expert guidance. This person will be less persuaded by promises and products, and more likely to invest himself first



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in the coach then in the coach’s program and application. It is almost an opposite of the previous consumer sample mindset.

At the same time that there are specific mindsets in the Fitness Industry who are likely to pursue coaching; there are also specific personality types. Once again, knowing this can be a precious tool for the coach in terms of really being able to reach a client. But knowing personality types and understanding how to deal with them are very different things. A good coach should be able to ‘categorize’ client’s personality type without forming judgment about it either way, for good or bad. It merely becomes an effective tool to use for coaching. Being able to effectively categorize a personality type of a client helps the coach with ongoing evaluation. It helps the coach to be able to anticipate potential problems and often troubleshoot in advance. But ‘categorize’ does not mean ‘stereotype’. There is a fine line between the two. So what are some examples of personality types? How could a coach address them accordingly? Well, two categories of client personality type come to mind; the overachiever and the underachiever.

The first thing to notice in this example is that neither the overachiever nor the underachiever has anything to do with physical elements, physique development, understanding the principles or education. They are personality types. And they exist across the board and at every point of fitness and level or prowess and ability. Here is how knowing about personality types can be a useful tool for coaching application. The overachiever will require challenge, but at the risk of burnout. The underachiever, on the other hand, will require getting unstuck from consistent stagnation in the process of application. Underachievers will be less consistent. These two types of personalities could both hire a coach and present the exact same vital statistics and the exact same lifestyle demands. And because of these latter indices, most coaches would coach them the same way. This would be a mistake. The overachiever and underachiever personality will not respond to the same communication and interaction strategy. This would seem obvious. Once again, understanding the job of coach means understanding that coaching is always “knowing about the client”. The effective coach coaches people ‐not programs. The effective coach coaches the person in the process and through the process. The program application is incidental to that focus.

For instance, overachievers will seldom if ever require motivation, pep talks, and lectures or hovering. Most would be suspicious of any of that. Overachievers also tend to be potential leaders and coaches themselves. Since I can spot an overachiever easily, I will often give them leadership roles at my conferences and workshops. To do so shows a coaching faith in them that they excel at meeting. The overachiever needs to be challenged, not only by the protocol but the learning process within it as well. For the overachiever, this learning process is often a personal one. It has little to do with gathering information. Conversely, the underachiever will



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often present signals of lack of self‐reliance, insecurity, various levels of fear and intimidation toward process. The underachiever is most susceptible as well to marketing hype and innuendo discussed above. It further enhances a sense of confusion in them. But this confusion, rather than moving them forward, instead becomes a source of stagnation.

One thing both personality types have in common is their investment in the coach. Neither type of client wants to disappoint the coach. This is psychological leverage that the coach can use. The aware coach employs this leverage not for his own purposes but on behalf of the client. By analogy, both the overachiever and underachiever will often report a sense of stagnation. The overachiever feels like he is neutral; while the underachiever feels like he is in park. Both types want to be driving down the road of experiencing progress. They look for the coach to put that vehicle in to the appropriate gear.

This ‘gear’, if you will, is what I refer to as the “attitude of consistency”. The coach’s ongoing interaction is aimed at instilling this attitude in the client. The best case scenario is the client embraces this attitude of consistency and runs with it during the application of protocol. Effectively instituting this attitude of consistency is a delicate balance between what is required from the client, physically, mentally and the client’s actual mental discipline and capabilities. (Back to personality types and mindsets again) The coach needs to be realistic in client consideration. Lifestyle factors will also need to be addressed. From the above example, overachievers will often overestimate their available time and energy; while underachievers, not surprisingly, will underestimate them. The coach needs to be realistic about what is a sustainable consistency for the client. Clients have to embrace and understand that consistency means showing up beyond when it is merely convenient to do so. The reality of doing the planning is much different than the idea of planning the doing. This effective attitude of consistency can require a different approach for the coach depending on who the client is, and how the client is. Overachievers move forward with foot on the gas pedal regardless of “traffic”. Underachievers move forward with foot on the brake and always worried about the surrounding traffic. Effective coaching is all about creating an effective “attitude of consistency” where the client needs it. And this means addressing the client by assessing and evaluating the client effectively within the triangle of awareness. Understanding character traits and personality types can serve as ‘cue cards’ for the coach to do so effectively.

Notes for Mentoring Students:

• Address the benefits of keeping a client file. Formulate a template for your own use. What kind of headings would you use? Why? As a sample exercise make “a client file” on yourself.



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• In the sample file on yourself fill in some information on the various headings you decided to use. Based on that information, as a coach, what would your “reasonable expectations” be moving forward?

Scenario 1:

“My name is John Smith. After careful consideration I want to hire you

to reach my goals. I am 28 years old and 5 ft 9 in and 150 lbs. I have

been training a long time but never seem to get anywhere. I know I am

carbs intolerant, and I follow a no carb/low carb diet. But I can’t seem

to stick to it. I always end up binging on crap food after a few days. I

need you to keep me on the diet. I want to gain lots of muscle, but lean

muscle. I don’t want to get fat. I seem to train all out and then lose my

motivation because I never see any results. I’m looking at you to coach

me and give me the right program. And also, motivate me to stay

hungry to achieve the results I’ve been after for so long. I look forward

to working with you.”

The above scenario is not uncommon. As a coach, how do you address it? How do you engage the ‘unlearning process’? What assumptions can you make based on the information? What “alternatives to the thinking process” could you present to this client?

Scenario 2:

A client has been with you now for a few months. Her most recent check in is much like her others since shortly after she started.

“This week was a bad week. Sunday was my PMS time, and since I had

to entertain I just said “screw it” to the diet. I ended up taking the day

off. It wasn’t too bad till near the end of the day then I really lost it, and

ate everything. Monday I felt so guilty and hung-over. My project at

work has me stressed out and I’m rushing to finish it. I missed Tues

and Wed workouts because of it. Thurs we had to go to a lunch

meeting about the project, so we ate in a restaurant. I didn’t really

have much choice but to eat what everyone else was eating. So

needless to say my diet and training weren’t the best this week. But I

really want this! I am starting fresh on Monday. I need your help to

keep me consistent in this.”



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Write a simulated coaching correspondence to the above client. Within the client interaction, how do you interject the elements of client accountability and responsibility? Concentrate not only on what to say, but how to say it. How do you build client confidence and competence here while still getting across the message of responsibility and accountability?

• In both examples above as well as your own sample file on yourself, write a coaching correspondence aimed at forging an attitude of consistency based on the information provided. Set them side by side: correspondence 1, correspondence 2, and correspondence 3. Note how they all differ. What do you learn from this?



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SECTION 4

Review of Common Themes and Concepts



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Chapter 13 Client Interaction

The key element of focus to coaching in any industry or arena is that effective coaching is all about this reality: The coach, coaches people, not programs. Yet where is this element of focus being taught in the Fitness Industry? The modern internet has led to the reality of the on‐line coach. Yet, till now, no one has properly addressed a significant study of the intricacies involved for the coach or on‐line coach in the fitness industry. This has led to many of the common failures of other fledgling industries as well. The information myth and bias has led to many of the most common mistakes we witness in education as well. It is a particular element of paradigm blindness. Coaching expertise entails two elements of relevance. Both have been the subject of this project. To reiterate first then, “coaches coach people, not programs.” The two elements of coaching here are: “1) knowing answers; and 2) teaching others these answers.” Unfortunately expertise in the Fitness Industry, like so many other industries, has been mistakenly caught up in the pursuit of #1, with an almost total neglect of #2. Some experts have referred to this black hole as “the curse of knowledge”. Allow me to explain.

Getting a message across or answering a client’s need involves not just knowing the answer but delivering it in a meaningful way. Here’s the problem with modern certification and industry expertise with its insistent focus on the “what” only; and usually at the expense of “who” and “why”. The “what” is an element of information. The “who” and the “why” are the coaching contexts and relevance and conduits for the implementation of that information. In the coaching relationship, you cannot have the former without the latter as a context. The problem is one of education focus, and as I have stated several times in this project, information is not knowledge.

The problem is one of disconnect. People invest inordinate amounts of time learning that becoming an “expert” is all about the accumulation of information and knowledge. Yet there is no focus on how to relate and communicate that knowledge to the client demographic. We see this all the time in other industries as well. It’s a matter of fact that a person can graduate from medical school or with an MBA in business without ever having to take a class in effective communication and interaction. Any of us with a higher education know that college professors take dozens of courses in their area of expertise, but none on how to teach it. The Fitness Industry has made the same mistake. So while a person can accumulate several certifications and accreditations in the Fitness Industry; they are left sorely lacking in the skills needed to apply this knowledge effectively. Instead of communicating relevant “ideas”, the modern Fitness Expert is lead to believe his expertise is a matter of sharing “information.” This is the blind side of coaching. And the problem with this accumulation of knowledge is that it can



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render the “expert” even more useless in the application of sharing that knowledge with the coaching client. For instance, in order to have the answers, you need expertise.

But once you gain a level of expertise it’s hard to disassociate it from the level of knowledge of your potential client. As an expert, you now know things others do not know which is why they will seek you out. However, you yourself cannot now remember what it was like to “not know” these things that qualify you as an expert. And then without the emphasis on #2 above, we have a black hole of communication. This leads the wannabe coach in the ineffective position of trying to interact with clients as if their audience was their own self. This is ineffectual because an illustration of knowledge is not a communication of knowledge. Wannabe coaches end up “sharing information” but not in a context of real teaching and learning for the client. The coach is ineffective because the ideas don’t last are not useful as a long term resource. The industry has failed by leading wannabe coaches to believe that education is like filling a bucket. But when it comes to effective coaching of a client; education is not like filling a bucket, but more like lighting a fire.

Coaching instruction and advice has to serve the mandate of coaching people, not programs. Within this mandate, the process of client experience is what is most relevant. Effective client interaction then must serve the client in the means of “lighting the fire, not filling the bucket”. For ongoing coaching, effectiveness client interaction must motivate the client in five key ways. The coach must communicate and interact in a way that motivates the client to pay attention to the coaching instruction and interaction. Instruction must be clear enough for a client to understand it and remember it long term. Coaching interaction must be effectual enough to empower the client to agree and believe in the coach’s instruction. The coaching interaction should motivate the client to care, not only about receiving the coach’s message, but care about the process of coaching communication as a whole. And most importantly, the coaching communication should be succinct enough for the client to act on the instruction in a way that they can internalize it in experience. So the coaching communication structure is one with the mission of 5 relevant points to engaging the client to learn on their own. The coaching instruction or feedback engages the client to:

1) Pay Attention

2) Understand and Remember the coach’s feedback

3) Agree and Believe in the coach’s communicated message

4) Care enough to engage and apply the coaching instruction

5) Have a clear direction to being able to act on the coaching advisement.



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The above illustrates how and why coaching is above and beyond “sharing ideas” of accumulated information. The above 5 points are more about the “who” the “how” and the “why” than they are about the “what”. Yet current industry focus has this reality backwards to the point where expertise is now just an idea of collecting more and more information; often without context, nuance, or application. In order to be relevant, the focus must come back to being client‐centred and not information‐based. The reality of the coaching environment, even on‐line, is that it is far more qualitative an experience. Hence, real coaches need to move further away from this total emphasis on facts and statistics; and closer to a centre which involves meaning and substance for the client application of protocol.

Interaction must first last and always be a two way mode of communication. Clients rely on the coach to set the agenda and structure the game plan. The coach relies on the client to inform him how the game plan is unfolding in terms of the client’s own experience of the application of protocol. For this dialogue to truly work, both the coach and the client must be able to understand and relate to each other’s feedback. Therefore, merely teaching “experts” the right information can often fail when the job of coach is getting the client to relate to instruction, understand instruction, apply instruction, and benefit from the experience of instruction. To that end, the coach needs to properly place the context of his job right‐side up. It is not about accumulating information after a certain point. I like to get wannabe coaches to adapt the acronym of “SUCCESS” here. Success stands for Strategy, Uncomplicated Communication (which should direct a client’s “understanding”). Clear instruction, Concise Feedback: Empowering the client whenever possible in real ways and means, not phony cheerleading. And simple, short communication exchange.

S = Strategy for client interaction

U = Uncomplicated Communication, Client Understanding

C = Clear Instruction

C = Concise feedback

E = Client Empowerment toward the task at hand or the interaction and feedback.

S = Simple instruction, simple forms of communication. Brevity.

S =Short interactive exchanges.

A strategy is a guide to behaviour. So the overall strategy for coaching any client in the fitness industry is the reality of the mantra, “Coaches coach people, not programs”. This sets the



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strategy for interaction. And no matter how complicated a client wants to make protocol seem, the coach’s goal in communication is to make interaction uncomplicated. The coach’s goal is to ensure the client understands his feedback and instruction and advisement. The best means of accomplishing this in communication is to always be clear and concise. And within that process of interaction, whenever possible the coach empowers the client for the client’s own engagement of accountability and responsibility. The coach needs to keep feedback and interaction with the client simple and whenever possible, short. This does not mean disengaging the client. It means not throwing useless concepts and explanations at the client which may only confuse him more.

The “SUCCESS” mode for client interaction should be a post‐it‐note for all coaches who need to practice communicating and interacting more effectively. The coaching strategy is one where the program and diet are secondary focus in comparison to effective interaction and communication with the client.

Client Feedback

This dictates, then, that the coach must value client‐feedback. Coaches and experts are all too eager to dictate to clients but not just as eager to engage client feedback. This is a huge mistake. It also fails to meet the criteria of what coaching is supposed to be. If the client’s feedback and input doesn’t matter to the coach, this will be felt by the client. Coaching is a relationship built on two‐way interaction, not one‐way dictatorship. But the current mode of accreditation in the industry is blind to the coaching role. And although coaching is about two‐way interaction, this does not imply that it is somehow a kind of negotiation. Coaching is never so.

The client looks to the coach for answers and insights. The coach needs the client feedback in order to be able to provide either in any worthy context. But the coach must keep to what is important within any client interaction. He must be succinct and focused. The coach who truly values the client’s feedback must have flexible communication skills. He must have enhanced listening skills as well. The best source of information for the coach, in regards to his client, is the client himself. And this is true physically, mentally and emotionally. So, the client’s feedback to the coach is the most valuable element in the coach’s coaching arsenal. And this can only be actualized with an emphasis on process, not just outcomes. It is going to take a client a while to reach their goals. Within that time period lots of things go on which can and will affect the process and the outcome. A coach can only properly evaluate and assess how the client is doing by paying attention and valuing client feedback.



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The coach should instruct and lead clients to know that client feedback is all about the experience and insights gained by them while following protocol. Feedback should be a free flowing subjective interpretation from the client to the coach. And the client feedback should be given at regular and frequent intervals. All clients progress at their own individual levels, physically and metaphysically speaking. Being processed‐based rather than just outcome‐based helps the coach to see things more deeply. The client reports and narrates his own subjective feedback within a certain time period. For the client to be able to do so without emphasis on having “accomplished” something leads for a greater and more honest feedback environment. A coach, who stresses “outcome” over process, induces an environment of stress and pressure into the feedback equation. Outcome and results within a client report are only part of the assessment and coaching evaluation. And in contrast, these on‐line coaches who give a client a protocol to follow for a specified number of calendar weeks, with little to no interaction with the client during that time frame are not ‘coaches’ by any stretch of the definition of the term.

Outcome and results are not the purpose for the feedback report. As the expert, it is often up to the coach to interpret a client’s feedback and illustrate back to him the results of process. Clients will more often than not focus on outcomes within a reporting period. But there are often many undetected results of client’s efforts that do not translate directly into measurable results. To focus only on “quantitative” elements of feedback, such as the weight scale or strength levels, can often mean missing a teaching opportunity with a feedback report. For the coach especially, the qualitative elements of feedback supersede the quantitative. Client feedback must be valued if it is to be properly evaluated. Effective coaching is about engaging client feedback for assessment, and involving the client in their own subjective experience. Effective coaching is about knowing and honouring in the relationship that “not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted, counts”.

After initial coaching instruction, the coach’s feedback should take its cue from the client’s feedback within a reporting period. The outcome is secondary to the process. A reporting period need not be about goal‐acquisition or non‐acquisition. But each reporting period will have some kind of “results” of application to assess. The client is the source of that assessment, so his feedback is essential, even if it must sometimes be re‐interpreted by the coach. Within any assessment of client feedback, the coach must weigh the specifics of the client’s feedback with the goals of the program and the experience of the client. Client character is part of the assessment. There will often be a back and forth emphasis of the coach between a focus on protocol results (the physical) and a focus on client experience of application (non‐physical). And just as often client feedback necessitates the coach to engage a focus on both.

As mentioned in a previous chapter, timeliness is crucial for coaching feedback. The client also should be given freedom and opportunity to report biofeedback in regular and frequent



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intervals. This is crucial for both the coaching process and the coaching relationship itself. If a coach is to give instruction, critique, or reinforcement of client feedback, then this coaching needs to come in a timely manner. The longer a coach takes to respond to client feedback, the less effective the coach, and the less effective his feedback. I am saddened yearly by the number of on‐line contacts I receive who report being “so happy that you got back to me so quickly”. Many report that previous or current coaches have provided them with a training program and/or diet, only to leave them alone in their application of it. These types of ‘coach’ direct the client to “contact me after 12 weeks” or whatever time frame. This is not coaching. It’s laziness. No two trainees will have the same experience or the same life stressors during an application of prescribed protocol. Coaching should be a service, not a product. Selling programs and diets is fine, but it does not fall under the category of “coaching”. Coaching is active, interactive, and concurrent with the application of protocol. People who write and tell me their “coach” takes two or three weeks to get back to them reflect to me just how intensely real coaching is missing in the fitness industry accreditation programs.

The client’s experience during the reporting period should tell the coach all he needs to know for evaluation and assessment. If not, the coach can just solicit more information and feedback from the client. Simple. If the coach doesn’t have enough information or feedback for relevant commentary, he merely interacts with the client to get the feedback he needs. Over time, this teaches the client what kind of feedback is important and what elements of feedback are irrelevant. But the client remains the source for the required information in coaching feedback.

The coach needs to be able to assume that all client feedback is sincere. As such, client feedback needs to be treated sincerely as well. Often clients will rationalize or even be self‐deluded about their levels of consistency and commitment. The coach must not meet such feedback with disdain, but with honesty. Coaching honesty is about relaying, mirroring and guiding the client via the client’s own feedback. If a client is being unrealistic in his thinking or application, the coach needs to say so, and in all honesty and truth. For the coach, the truth always has strength and a voice. But this truth must be delivered with tact. Often, clients just do not know any better. This is why their feedback is so valuable an assessment tool. And the coach always centres on working “with” the client in terms of feedback and interaction. When clients are being unrealistic, the coach must instruct the client toward a better understanding. Employing client‐feedback gives the coach a starting point. He should address client illusions or rationalizations by discussing ideas, not personalities. Engaging the client in this manner is all about communication and not about being right or wrong. Feedback should never be a contest with a winner and loser. Feedback is all about relaying appropriate information and instruction based on the client feedback.



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By analogy, I liken the coaching interactive experience to a tennis match. It begins with the client giving the coach the obligatory start up information like vital stats, pictures, lifestyle assessment, fitness goals etc. The coach then takes this information and designs the appropriate protocol for the client to implement. The coach “volleys” this information to the client and the client begins to undertake the program. During the client’s implementation, his own feedback becomes essential. (See my book, The Abel Approach, regarding biofeedback) The client then volleys this subjective experience back into the coach’s court. The coach assesses this information and volleys back any commentary, instruction or advice back to the client. And it continues this way. Notice this is an interactive approach which necessitates the client feedback. It does not ignore it. Anyone thinking coaching is not a process but a dictation does not understand the concept of coaching. Moreover, by consistently downplaying the role of coaching, the fitness industry is reinforcing a one‐way instruction model of application which actually negates the client in their own process of achievement. Like most industries that mistakenly follow this information model; the process is negated and the methodology is incomplete. Coaching requires attention to both the ongoing process and the client’s own feedback within the application of this process. To conceive of anything less than this reality is a mistake. And this mistake is the black hole of current industry accreditation and study.


• This chapter repeats some common themes of the book, but within the context of client feedback. Why is the emphasis on client feedback so important?

• What are the 5 elements for engaging the client in ongoing feedback?

• Make a post it of the acronym S.U.C.C.E.S.S. and review it. Look at mock client examples from pervious chapters. Use the S.U.C.C.E.S.S. points to review and redo client interaction exercises. What do you learn about your coaching interactive skills?

• Make a bullet list of your own of any underlined or bold font of this chapter that stands out to you. What have you learned? How can you use this knowledge and apply it effectively in the coaching environment? Make notes.



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Chapter 14 Summary of Concepts and Conclusion

I started this project by letting you in on two questions regarding my career success in the Fitness Industry. And those questions were “How did I get here?” and “How am I still here?” I am now starting my 4th decade as a professional in the Fitness Industry. And when I look back to the journey, the same answer keeps coming up. My success in this industry is attributed to one word. Coaching. And while I certainly developed my knowledge of Fitness along the way, this was a variable of influence. The coaching skill‐set was the constant. The truth is knowledge will come and go. It has a vogue trend to it in the Fitness Industry. Certification has become a business and therefore the definition of ‘certified’ has certainly been diluted. It’s amazing to me how many clients I get who come to me certified, experienced, some with advanced degrees etc. Their credentials seem to claim “competence” loud and clear. But the ongoing sad truth is that a large percentage of these individuals do not seem to know and recognize a good majority of what I would expect them to know based on their credentials. Clearly we have a problem in this industry where “certified” does not equal “qualified”. Earlier chapters have addressed this.

The fitness industry has many components and certification reflects a lot of these components. There are now certifications for the “tools” of the trade without any understanding of the “rules” of the trade. Right now someone can put on a “certification” for a TRX or for Cross‐Fit or even the Bosu Ball. Think about it. These are but tools. Does a master craftsman learn how to be a craftsman by taking a course in “the screwdriver”? The business side of certification is replacing the competence element of what certification represents. This is a problem to be sure. The industry has not only become complacent in the turnstile nature of the business, but is now capitalizing on it as well. The truth, as discussed in earlier chapters, is that 80% of people pursuing fitness as a vocation will no longer be in the industry in five years. This is true even of trainers. And those who remain will only experience horizontal job mobility within a labour‐intensive orientation to personal training. This tends to burn out even those who actually are qualified because in order to get ahead, they have to work longer and longer hours. These realities need to be addressed. Certification is failing to be a measure of true competence in an industry with a global influence. Coaching, as a real vocation, with real operating principles and skills is not even under address in any real form in the industry. Coaching needs to be understood in order to be pursued as a viable means to a career path in the fitness industry. Coaching needs to be understood for what it is and what it involves. Coaching and leadership skills need to begin to be a part of a huge emphasis of these legitimate organizations. The era of the fitness coach and on‐line coach is here. Coaching competence is not.



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One of the main thrusts of this project has been elucidating an understanding of the information myth in the industry. Mastery of subject matter is imperative in any vocation. Coaching is no exception. The issue is, how does someone get there? The current trend in industry certification and in industry marketing is that mastery exists in the accumulation of lots of information. This is untrue and false. Without a context of guiding principles, information is just stock‐piled and meaningless. It is akin to knowing the alphabet without knowing the rules of vowels and consonants. Operating principles need to always be the focus for mastery and performance. And yet a glimpse of any symposium or conference lecture docket usually illustrates the problem of methods over principles; or even worse, minutia over substance. It seems these advanced organizations are speaking past their audience and speak to a narrower and narrower target audience all the time. And that is a target audience of “people just like themselves”: In other words, other experts. It leads the consumer and client at all these lectures left to merely gather information at the expense of understanding much of it. For coaching mastery, the principles are even harder to grasp. And they must be actively practiced not merely studied. This is indeed a coaching dilemma in terms of a learning curve in being an effective coach or on‐line coach. The operating principles need to be understood and practiced. This is not accomplished by gathering information.

Truth be told, in coaching as in many other fields, knowledge is better served by being an inch wide, but a mile deep. However, the information myth continues to perpetrate the illusion that knowledge is an inch deep but a mile wide. Mastery for coach is all about knowing and practicing the subject matter and skill‐set of being a coach. Coaching skills entail communication and interaction skills, both oral and written. Leadership ability, emotional maturity and other elements of professional relationships must be understood and served in the coaching environment. The difference between the information myth of the knowledge and the actual working of the understanding of the principles is obvious. For instance “activation thresholds” and “macronutrient breakdown of a diet” have little to do with coaching efficiency. And yet, if coaching is the job, how is something so obvious missed and distorted in terms of relevance? All sorts of information and perspective on method and program application do not deal with the fundamental reality of the coaching relationship and the coaching environment.

It’s been argued ad nauseum in the Fitness Industry that “methods are many, but principles are few”. (Aristotle) As true as this is, symposiums continue to push agendas of “methods” without assessing whether the trainee understands the operating principles within them. There are a million roads to access to get a client to reach their physical goals. Coaching provides the smooth pavement of those roads. The coach provides the map and the depiction of the territory. It is up to the client to traverse it. Now then, these principles of coaching need to supersede this over‐focus on the information bias. Or at least, let’s have them meet in the



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middle. Scientific “research” and “studies” are not yielding better results for clients, or even for wannabe trainers. I have been part of “gathering” knowledge and information for the better part of three decades. I have seen the dismal results it brings professionally speaking. I have left behind or forgotten more knowledge than most experts will ever acquire. Why? Because it wasn’t pertinent to me being better at my job as coach! The truth is ‐ some knowledge is a vogue trend, here today, gone tomorrow. Other knowledge simply has nothing to do with effective coaching involved in helping a client get from point A to point B.

It is time to study, address, and enact the operating principles of true coaching and true on‐line coaching in the fitness industry. This project has been an attempt to open the door to do so.

The Job of Coach or On‐Line Coach in the Fitness Industry

What makes a good coach is often difficult to distinguish. It’s a combination of many factors we will address in this section. Suffice it to say there are individuals in the Fitness World right now who have reputations as being “great coaches” who are in fact anything but. Some of these so‐called coaches are nothing more than internet marketers. Others are no more than advanced trainers. (This is at least a step up from the marketers.) As an aside, one look at professional athletics points out how stark this deviation of the fitness industry really is. In professional athletics, the “coach” is a tried and true respected role with clear delineations and requirements. No way would a ‘trainer’ or a ‘marketer’ ever have a job or title as a coach in any arena of modern sport. The fact that the illusion of expertise is so readily apparent in the Fitness Industry and on the internet just underscores the need for the industry to truly address some kind of accreditation for the vocation of “Fitness Coach”. Indeed even the terms trainer and coach are used interchangeably as meaning the same thing. They are not. All of this has led to a general misunderstanding as to the role of coach in the Fitness Industry.

Previous chapters have addressed the Information Myth. Coaching necessitates getting away from a one‐sided dogmatic approach of employing information bias as the building force of knowledge for coaching clients to reach their fitness goals. A client reaching and sustaining their fitness goals will have just as much to do with aspects of character and lifestyle awareness than a mere application of information taught by a trainer. Particular and specific information a coach can acquire must be applied within the relevant context of client awareness and ability. What looks great in studies, textbooks, articles and symposiums may have little bearing on what works in the real world: or even more importantly, may have little bearing in terms of that particular specific client and what he will respond to best. The problem as I see it is that wrong answers are coming from asking wrong questions. The question for the coach is not “what information that I know should I access for this client?” That question objectifies the client as a



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non‐entity in his own program. The more appropriate coaching question is instead, “who is my client?” And the evaluation of the client from this key question unfolds from there. The information bias works against coaching when clients become perceived as mere objects “receiving” a program and/or diet. I should think this mistake to be obvious when put this way.

True coaching then is about the growth and development of the client, regardless of the field of endeavour. If that seems like a tall task to take on in the Fitness Industry; well, it is. But it remains the accurate depiction of coaching nonetheless. Some clients may not even be ready themselves to take on coaching. A “trainer” may be a more appropriate fit for a client. But to apply on‐line, long distance expertise to a client in the fitness industry is truly a role befitting a coach. “Trainer” work cannot be accomplished long distance. The coach accesses all three elements of the triangle of awareness for client evaluation. A great coach may even have to be involved in re‐defining the client’s goals as well. This happens to me frequently. Some clients have goals much grander than their current capabilities. The coach can reshape current unattainable goals into a process the client can own in real terms. A “program” cannot do this on its own. It’s all right for the coach to interact with a client in such a way and means to engage the client to understand and appreciate real and attainable goals in both short term and long term context. Again, this illustrates the reality of coaching the client. A program in and of itself serves no purpose within this context of client achievement. Coaching is about re‐asserting the priority of the nature of the experience for the client. Goal achievement is only part of a long process. If the client gains little to no understanding of himself or the process throughout that journey, then more is lost than is gained. The coach’s role is in the client’s journey toward the destination. The actual arrival at that destination (the goal) is entirely for the client to own and accomplish. He can only do this in real terms if his process is nurtured in a way that builds competence and confidence along the way. In reality, the coach is a vehicle for appropriately directing and addressing a client’s mental, physical, and emotional energies. Coaching is about appropriately leading and teaching the process. It is not about creating robots or submissive slaves. The wannabe coach who approaches the job from the base of the information bias instead of the client will be wrongly focused on “his” program. This will have the tendency to try to create training robots and slaves. If the structure of focus is, instead, all about the client, this classic mistake can be avoided.

Yes, coaching provides both insight and inspiration to the client. But this should be accomplished in subtle and indirect means. The coach should not be attached to any part of a role to want to be an inspiration to the client. The coach, who pays attention to this part of his role, is the coach who is marred in his own ego needs. The real coach leads and teaches the client as part of the process. It is not about cheerleading the client. And it certainly is not about receiving accolades for the coach either. This is not to suggest there exists “coaching



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objectivity”. The point is the coach is not emotionally invested in the client, but professionally invested in him.

Coaching Bias

A coach will always have a perceptual bias. It’s called “perspective”. Any good and honest coach starts with this recognition within himself. The reality is many coaches and many experts go along preaching about objectivity. There is no such thing when dealing with people. So coaches end up coaching within their own subjective interpretation of their “objectivity”. It is at best a rationalization of perspective. A great coach doesn’t hide from his biases or misrepresent them. A great coach makes his biases an active and working part of his strength for coaching. Coaching bias is not a weakness to avoid, but a reality to embrace. Coaching is relationship‐based. There is no objectivity in that, only fairness. These are different entities. The Fitness Industry in its blind attempt to quantify everything leads to a perception of an “objective basis” for client interaction; when none exists. The industry’s focus on “stuff” (information = knowledge) has led trainers and wannabe coaches to believe the client is mere object in the process. The perception of objectivity leads to a coaching and training perception of both of these being something you do “to” the client. The client is not mere object. The client is actor within his own process of application. Coaching is something you engage “with” the client. The client will have his own subjective perceptions of himself within the process. He is not “objective” either. So this emphasis on the research and science is misleading in regards to the coaching reality of coaching being an active and ongoing relationship. Let’s be clear here. The coach is subjective with a bias of perspective. His coaching role is also a subjective one. It must be because it is a relationship. The objectivity involved and what should be aimed for within the relationship is fairness. The coaching bias should not affect his “fairness” within the evaluation, assessment, and client‐interaction. And this reality demands a certain level of maturity and awareness of the coach.

Beyond what the coach knows are the elements of the non‐verbal and non‐communicated aspects of coaching. In this regard, the most valuable tool for the coach in terms of client influence would have to be “modelling”. Responsibility and accountability is a two‐way street. The coach himself should model and demonstrate whatever behaviours and attitudes he expects from his client. There is no clearer influence to effective non‐verbal coaching than modelling. The industry has fostered a growing expertise based on knowing how to talk the talk. The good coach can also walk the walk. He often walks it, better than he talks it. Being able to lead by example gives the coach a certain level of real‐world credibility. But this does not have to mean physical prowess. To suggest so would be once again to over‐emphasize the physical side of the triangle of awareness. Being able to lead by example gives the client the



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‘how’ and the ‘why’ to follow. Handing the client a program merely provides them with the “what” of application. Effective coaches are able to model themselves their own expectations. Again, this may seem like a lot to expect of a Fitness Expert, and it is. But effective coaching should go beyond whatever field within which it is applied. If the coach cannot follow his own advice in terms of behaviour and attitude, than he can hardly be taken seriously. Modelling should not be something the coach is “trying to do, or prove” either. It should just be how he, the coach, conducts himself in the coaching relationship.

Now, saying that coaching is a relationship gives a certain impression. Saying coaching is also subjective not objective is also suggestive. Then adding to this by stating coaching must be personal also gives a certain impression. But context is everything to understanding the job of coach. The coaching role is all these things but it is also about being professional and fair. So the reality is that while the coaching approach must always be personal, the relationship is not. The coach can be interested in a client and interact in personal ways in order to be effective, but there is also a boundary in place that cannot be crossed. This is the professionalism of coaching. The coaching client is never “friend” or “family member” type of relationship; not when money is being exchanged for service. Knowing this boundary should be automatic. Insisting that coaching be personal in order to be professional is not a contradictory statement. And the same goes within the spirit of client interaction as well. The coach needs to disassociate himself from client‐feedback. There is a big difference between evaluating and assessing client feedback and performance vs. judging that client as a person. This is not what is meant by stating the coaching must be “personal”. Too many wannabe coaches take liberties within the relationship that cross the professional boundary.

So the role of coach is a multi‐component role that is always changing and always different. Each coach/ client relationship is different and each coach/client relationship will change as it progresses. Because the coach deal, with the physical, mental, emotional, and even cultural aspects of a client’s working perspective, there is always more to the job than just the job. The job beyond the job for the coach is to know, understand, and embrace the reality of the difference between the job description and the actual reality of doing the job. Coaching in the fitness industry is like coaching in any other realm. So it is first about people, and second about fitness. I know this statement will meet with incredulity and even hostility by some. But I make this statement from having assessed my professional success in this industry now entering its fourth decade. So as controversial as it may seem in this modern era of the information myth; I know this statement to be true. Information‐based sourcing, even something like this book, is one dimensional and linear. The job is anything but. The reality of coaching is that it is always changing. It is always different. It is non‐linear and active, not passive. Material is neutral and a non‐entity. Coaching is non‐neutral and a live entity; a live



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relationship. The study of coaching and the doing of coaching are different worlds. The reality is that the study of coaching may not prepare someone adequately for the “doing” of coaching.

Because the role of coach is always different and changing, the effective coach needs to be flexible in style of interaction. Rigid‐type coaches will cater to a very tiny niche market of similar thinking clients. This will not bode well for long term vocational success. For a coach to insist on dogmatic interpretations of protocol is a risky professional approach. Such a one‐sided rigidity can risk losing a client’s enthusiasm, understanding and long term compliance. Once again, such rigidity of style tends to negate and objectify the client. All communication tools of a coach can vary from coach to coach or client to client even. But the ultimate goal and end products are for client compliance and client understanding. If a coach can sway clients to employ and apply protocol creatively, the clients continue to move forward as they gain competence and confidence in their application. The more viable and sustainable coach is the non‐rigid, flexible style of coach. A coach needs to be able to allow and even encourage that a client’s experience and application can be “different” than expected, without being wrong. As long as the client’s application complies with the coach’s prescribed protocol, client creativity can be a source for coaching encouragement. Rigid‐type coaches have their egos threatened by “different” when “different” can be elucidating and liberating for both client and coach. There should not be a perceived apparent threat to the coach’s authority within the coach/client relationship. Flexible coaching negates the emphasis on “authority”. Mutual goals explained clearly should leave room for a client’s potential creativity. This is true both in terms of application of protocol and interaction as well.

Remember, the client is a live entity and the client will and should influence the nature of the relationship as well. Rigid coaching approaches cannot tolerate this; therefore they tend to negate and objectify the client. The coach’s flexibility in style and communication needs to be as varied as the personalities of the client’s who seek his service. No way around that for anyone who hopes to make a living as a coach for the long term. Niche markets like MMA training, marathon training, bodybuilding training etc, will come and go and change. The need of people for coaching will not. A coaching style which is flexible will more likely engage the client to embrace and own his part in the process more so than a rigid coaching style that dictates in one direction only.

It should now be established that the client is an active component and mutual participant in the coaching relationship. The client is not merely the “receiver of information and instruction”. The client plays an obvious and essential role in their own process of application. So in the coaching relationship what kind of feedback and interaction will help the coach to help the client? In a word ‐ “qualitative”. The overall focus of client‐feedback should be one that engages subjective qualitative feedback from the client. How does the client think they are



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doing? How are they enjoying the process? How difficult does the process seem? This is what a relationship‐focused style of feedback emphasizes. Any quantitative goals or evaluations should be a mere part of the overall emphasis of the client’s own subjective feedback of experience of application. In this sense, then, the training is the test and the test is the training. Quantitative measures can be misleading at best. On their own, quantitative goals can be destructive as well. Again, the coaching emphasis must go beyond the physical aspects of the triangle of awareness. An eye toward long term positive client experience must be weighed against short term quantitative measurements of “progress”. The real coach has an eye on the immediate, the residual, and the cumulative elements of client protocol application. The “trainer mentality” is stuck in the immediate. In and of themselves arbitrary measurements of progress can be meaningless or misleading. I can make the weight scale change in days by subtracting carbs from a diet or adding calories. Does either truly measure the client’s “progress”? No. Quantitative measurements and evaluations should serve the coach/client relationship as “indicators” only. They are part of the coaching protocol, not the reason for it.

Coaching communication and interaction is the vehicle for client expression. And client expression should be encouraged. As such, coaching “skill” should have some obvious components for interactive efficiency.

1) Follow‐through: A coach should always follow through and follow up with clients to make sure a client fully grasps any coaching advice and is capable of implementing it. The coach does not “assume” the client understands a communication, but follows through to ensure it.

2) On‐point communication: The effective coach is all about keeping communication on‐point and focused. He does not use industry jargon if it is not needed.

3) The coach is never arrogant enough to think his job is to “fix people”. His interaction is client‐centred and process‐oriented.

4) The coach encourages the client to embrace the idea that coaching is a two‐way axis. He does not “assign” a protocol for a given number of weeks and then just dictate to the client to “contact me after that time”. That is not coaching.

5) The coach’s emphasis is on communication, process, and interaction. This goes a long way to preventing confusion and necessitating rehashing old information. The coach engages the client to understand that coaching is a process they share. Coaching is not something done “to” the client, but “with” the client. This requires ongoing interaction of the client relating his experience to the coach.

6) Through communication, the coach establishes and encourages a real working relationship where the client is free to bring up questions, issues, obstacles and progress within their



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biofeedback and experience of protocol. Coaching should be an open‐ended qualitative experience unique to each coaching relationship.

All the above nuances to coaching are about working together not working “on”. A client’s program is some‐thing you work “on” as a coach. You work on things, not on people. The client application of process is something you both share together. The coach’s goal is to enhance that experience.

Conclusion

I would like to sum up the whole of this project as succinctly as possible. Many themes, words and phrases have been repeated throughout this text, on purpose. So many elements of real coaching necessitate them being repeated in different contexts. The coach’s role is always a unique one. And with the proliferation of the modern internet, the Fitness Coach and the on‐line Fitness Coach is now a reality. The job of Fitness Coach needs to be studied, discussed, learned and taught. Having said that, the truth is that coaching is all about “doing” not just “knowing”. And this is something the industry seems to have had upside down for some time. Knowledge in the industry is now being reduced to some sort of trivia pursuit regardless of context or relevance. The industry currently reminds me of the TV Game show “Jeopardy”. Knowledge of information, often unrelated, becomes confused with wisdom and know‐how. People log on to various websites to pick up catch‐phrases and industry jargon in order to sound and come off as being “in the know”. It’s as easy game to win at. Unfortunately this does a tremendous disservice to the consumer in the industry. Coaching is more difficult to fake because it is about the “doing”. The more projects like this come to the surface to be studied, the better the consumer and expert will be at discriminating a true coaching professional from the many posers.

The truth is the coach can wear many hats at any given time. The coach can be trainer, trouble‐shooter, innovator, guidance‐counsellor, parent, teacher, supervisor, confidant, servant, role‐model etc. And often the coach can be a combination of these all at once. What all these various contingency roles have in common is the element of a relationship! For the coach, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Coaching is leadership and all the elements contained within the broadest definition of that term. As we have studied in this project, what the real coach actually is is far and away different than the way expertise is currently being taught and accredited in the Fitness Industry. This is the blind‐spot or black hole which the industry needs to address. The expertise involved in coaching is much different than the expertise involved in being a “fitness expert”. For the coach, there is more to the job than just the job. The job of coach never boils down to what you know about “fitness” but how well you



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can teach and influence others in a positive way. Why is this so difficult to grasp? In terms of the coach/client relationship, Yeats makes my point best, when he said “education is not so much filling a bucket, as lighting a fire.”

So how is coaching achievable as a long term vocation? What is the value of coaching? Well let me speak personally on this. When I address my 3 plus decades of success in this industry, the only word that comes to mind is “coaching”. My clients average a 5 year stay with me. Think about that statistic. To last this long in a professional relationship must go beyond mere programs and workouts, because any fitness consumer can get those anywhere. Again, the importance to stress is the job beyond the job.

In the end great coaching can be explained with the acronym “I Care” or “I. C.A.R.E”. This stands for “Integrity, Client‐Centred Focus, Accountability in the relationship, Respect for the role of both coach and client, and Excellence.” This short acronym also explains how coaching is about the “doing” more so than the knowing. As a job with expertise within any domain that requires specific knowledge as well, the role of coach is unique unto itself. In the Fitness Industry, a competitor can train themselves to be a physique champion. And yet, this does not mean or equate to this person becoming an effective coach. Another person can accumulate degrees and accreditations across the board; and yet, this also does not necessarily equate or translate to being an effective coach. The role of coach is not so easily defined by such accomplishments. Yes, science and research can indeed be a resource for know‐how. Talent can also be a resource for know‐how. But the point is, COACHING ITSELF IS A TALENT! So how does a person serious about helping others become an effective coach?

Grooming and Mentoring

After answering for myself at the beginning of this project those two pertinent questions, “How did I get here?” “Why am I still here”? I was left with a dilemma. If “coaching” is the answer to these questions, and coaching is not offered in any type of accreditation or study in the industry, then how does anyone become an effective coach? How does someone build and sustain a client‐base and establish a vocation as a coach in the industry? I looked at my own experience as well as examining “Coach” in other industries, especially professional sports. No one in pro sports comes out of a “study program” and is named to a team as a coach. Pro sports recognize what I have been saying all along. “Coaching is a talent.” “Coaching talent is separate from domain knowledge. Domain knowledge is just a part of coaching.” “Coaching is about DOING, not knowing.” A study of coaching in pro sports reveals what I call “grooming and mentoring”. All coaches start off as ‘assistant coaches’. And they often start out in the junior leagues or farm teams as well. They gain a reputation from a team’s success as well as



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both the mentor’s feedback, as well as their player’s feedback. (Players in the Fitness Industry would equate to “clients”) Coaches then are “groomed” to be coaches, by observation from other coaches. They are mentored to take on greater responsibility and deeper understanding for the role of coach. Their industry knowledge is already assumed.

In my own career, several of my clients and protégés have also gone on to establish themselves as trainers and coaches in the Fitness Industry. They have been able to sustain themselves for several years as well. They were effectively “groomed” to a more professional role. They moved from client to coach. However, in the past, this effect on my clients was less conscious. This book offers a guideline for those who seek to become and sustain a role as “Coach” in the Fitness Industry. But as just a study guide, the book remains incomplete. I implore anyone reading this to take on a mentorship for coaching. Only in mentoring can someone go from the “knowing” to the “doing”.

This project offers insight not only in to the job of “Coach”. This project also offers insight to the Fitness Consumer so that they can more clearly find an expert to help them, one whose approach fits with the definition of coach. Mastery of process should be the goal. There is no magic in “a” fitness program or “a” specific diet. Trainers manage and oversee workouts. Coaches, manage and oversee people. There a few very few qualified coaches in the fitness industry who meet the definition and ability and talent requirements for “Coach”. My hope is that this project is the first of many to properly educate people of the role of coach. This project offers study and potential grooming and mentoring to the role as well. From here I hope other industry experts will take up the cause to begin to address a need for further study and discussion of the job of coach in the Fitness Industry.


• Since this chapter is a redress of other themes and concepts throughout the book, I suggest the mentoring student do the following. For this chapter, write down any words or phrases highlighted in bold font or underlined. Write down the acronym “I.C.A.R.E.” as well. Study all of these. What key words and phrases jump out at you as most meaningful? Address why that is.

• Within these highlighted words and phrases, what do you learn that you didn’t know before? Look to empower yourself as a coach.

• NOW, DO THE SAME FOR EACH CHAPTER. WRITE DOWN ALL WORDS HIGHLIGHTED IN BOLD OR UNDERLINED. WRITE DOWN ANY ACRONYMS OR POINT FORM



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INSTRUCTIONS. ADDRESS NOT ONLY WHAT YOU LEARN FROM DOING SO, BUT ALSO WHERE YOU THINK YOUR OWN STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES LIE IN TERMS OF THESE NOTES. FINALLY, RETURN TO THESE NOTES OVER AND OVER AGAIN AS WELL AS THE PRACTICE EXERCISES AT THE END OF EACH CHAPTER. ENGAGE, CHALLENGE, INSPIRE AND PRACTICE YOUR ROLE OF COACH.


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Scott Abel Coach Whisperer