Rash of the Titans

8/8/2019 Rash of the Titans

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Rash of the Titans


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Cast of Characters

Zeus: male

Poseidon: male

Hades: male

Apollo: male

Artemis: female

Dionysus: male

Hera: female

Athena: female

Eros: male

Abacus (voice): female

Demetria the Oracle: female


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ACT I

Scene 1

The scene starts in Blackout, with the occasionalthunder crashes and lightning flashes of a strongstorm. As the storm dies down, a beam of light

illuminates Far Stage Right, where Demetria theOracle stands. She is a mysterious figure, with anotably observant and aloof nature.

DEMETRIAThe world is always changing. It has changed since itsbirth, and even more rapidly than expected sincePrometheus gave to Man the gift of fire. And in everyera of Mans existence, there have been heroes; mortalsin some stories, demigods in others. The Greeks, of anage that you, in this time, call the Ancient World,were especially known for their heroes. But this is nota tale of heroes, my friends, for the Age of Heroes

ended long ago. But for those that aided the heroes,those that have been called gods for millennia...thestruggle has only begun. The year is two thousand andeleven, in what you call the Common Era. A high schoolsenior will embrace his destiny. Rather, hispredestination. For the choice is not his own.

Fade to Blackout at Far Right.

Scene 2

Lights up on Left, Center, and Right. We are inthe Council Chamber of Mount Olympus, the home ofthe Gods. The Council Chamber consists of fourclassic Greek columns, two of them pristine(upstage and downstage Right) and two of a moredilapidated nature (upstage and downstage Left),as well as a colossal Grecian vase upstage Center.The Council table sits further downstage Center,and it is at this table that Ares, the God of War,and Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom, sit playing agame of chess. Ares moves his rook into aking-threatening position.

ARES

Check.

ATHENASo I see, Ares.

ARESYou are a wise opponent, Athena, but you are no masterof war.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 2.

ATHENAPerhaps, Ares, but unlike you, I know when to be quiet.

ARESHow do you mean?

Athena moves her queen and takes out Ares king,much to the latter gods shock and disappointment.

ATHENACheckmate.

ARESNo fair.

ATHENAA word to the not-so-wise, Ares. Never let youropponent know when you have an advantage.

ARESYoure sick.

ATHENANo, I am smart.

(Ares grumbles to himself.)What? No comeback?

Enter Hera from Stage Right with a yell offrustration, followed by Poseidon. Ares and Athenareact respectively: Ares yelps and hides himselfbehind Athena. Athena reaches out and takes Heraby the shoulders.

HERA(Forcibly removing Athenas hands fromher person)

Go away, Athena.

ATHENAI did not say a word.

POSEIDONHera, you cant let your temper get the better of you.

HERA(Turning on Poseidon)

Leave the words of wisdom to Athena, Poseidon. I dontwant to hear it.

She storms off Stage Left as Hades enters StageRight and hovers near the wings.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 3.

ARESWhats her problem?

HADESZeus had puppies.

ATHENAPuppies?

HADESSilly me. Im a liar. Thats puppy, singular. One.

ARESHow can Zeus have a puppy?

ATHENAHe had another child, dimwit.

ARES

God of War. Excuse me...

ATHENAWhen did this happen?

POSEIDON(Sighs)

About eighteen years ago, apparently.

HADESYoud think that Hera would keep a better eye on herhusband.

POSEIDONYoud think.

ATHENANo one knew?

HADESWrong. Zeus knew.

POSEIDONI think she assumed that, Hades.

HADESIm just clarifying, Water Wiz. No need to startboiling.

POSEIDONYou know, Hades, if you keep it up, maybe I wont stepin the next time Zeus pulls out his lighting bolts onyou.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 4.

HADESAll right! Jeez! Calm the waters, pal.

ATHENACan we get back to the topic at hand, please? What isZeus going to do about this child?

HADES(Bitterly)

Probably make the kid a hero among the mortals, knowingSparkys style...

POSEIDONZeus is going to bring the boy here. Then, we willdecide his fate.

ARESWe, the Olympians?

POSEIDON

Yes.

HADESWell, that rules me out.

ARESWhat?

HADESIm not an Olympian.

ARESBut youre a god.

ATHENAThe Dead cannot take care of themselves, Hades. Itshard, time-consuming work. Even though you cant spenda lot of time here, youre still valued.

HADESRight... Even so, youd think Id have some say here,considering I am the oldest and the only god with anactual job. (As he exits) The working elderly get norespect...

POSEIDONDamn it, Hades.

HADES(Interrupting)

Already have, little bro.

He exits.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 5.

POSEIDONWell, at least he didnt call me "Squirt" this time.

HADES (V)(From offstage)

Thanks for the reminder, Squirt!

Poseidon performs a flawless face-palm and followsHades offstage.

POSEIDON(As he exits, frustrated)

I. Am getting. My trident.

Pause. Ares picks up a chess piece and waves itunder Athenas nose. She follows it with her eyes.

ARESRematch?

Athena takes the chess piece.

ATHENASet them up.

Ares sets up some of the pieces.

ARESWait a minute. Set up your own pieces.

They sit as the finish setting up.

ATHENAYour move.

As Ares moves, Hera enters and crosses to exit onthe other side.

HERA(As she walks)

Zeus!!!

Her sudden presence and accompanying yell startleAres, who accidentally knocks over all of hispieces.

ATHENA(Mock sympathy)

Ares! You destroyed your own army!

Ares rises indignantly and storms off. Athenachuckles, gathers up the game, and exits the otherside. Lights down.


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6.

Scene 3

Lights up on Far Right, where Zeus, the God ofThunder, Dionysus, the God of Wine and Parties,and Apollo, the God of the Sun and of the Arts,sit in a tavern-like setting. Each holds a goblet

of wine in his hand.

DIONYSUS(Finishing a joke)

...And the second guy says, "What do you think I am,crazy? Youd turn off the light when I was halfwayacross!"

All laugh, mostly Dionysus.

ZEUSJeez, kid, where did you get that one?

DIONYSUSDid you like?

ZEUSOh yeah. Ive heard a lot of jokes in my time, butnever one like that.

DIONYSUSIm glad. Any more wine, boys? Classic Greek,fifteen-hundred B.C.E. Great year.

APOLLOThanks, but no. Ones enough for me.

DIONYSUSSuit yourself, Apollo. Youre missing out. (To Zeus)How about you, big boy? More?

ZEUSYes, please. But Dionysus.

DIONYSUSWhats up?

ZEUSDont call me "big boy." Im your father. At least callme Zeus.

DIONYSUSAll right, all right. Sorry, Pap.

(He pours some wine into Zeus goblet asHera enters in a huff.)

Say when.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 7.

HERAWhen.

All turn to face her. Zeus rises.

DIONYSUS

Hera! My lovely cherry blossom, how are you?

HERACan it, Dionysus. Zeus, we need to talk.

Apollo gulps down the last of his wine and rises.

APOLLOThats my cue to go. Thanks, Dionysus.

DIONYSUS(Crossing around to join him)

Wait up, Apollo. I want to show you something.

They exit while talking.

APOLLOWhat is it?

DIONYSUSHave you ever been to the Roger Williams Zoo? Greatplace for a party.

They have exited. Hera turns on Zeus.

ZEUS

Look, Hera. If its about the kid -

HERA(Cutting him off)

If its about the kid? Its always about the kid!Whatever kid you decide to have with some other woman!

ZEUSIts my nature, Hera. Like a hurricane. Strong andassertive. I cant help that.

HERAOur whole damn marriage has been a hurricane! Sure, itwas interesting at first, but you left it a completedisaster!

ZEUSHera, youre letting your temper get the better of you.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 8.

HERAMy temper? Mr. "Im in a bad mood so Ill destroy acountry"?

ZEUSThats Ares, sweetheart.

HERAWhatever! I think I have a right to be pissed off withyou!

ZEUSThe children Ive fathered have always been strong andintelligent! Dont you want healthy, smart children?

HERAYes! Yes, I do! But I want them to be my own!

Enter Artemis, the Goddess of Nature.

ZEUSHey, Artemis.

ARTEMISHey, Dad.

HERA(In one breath)

Go away, youre not my kid!

ARTEMIS(Shocked)

Im just passing through, Hera. No need to snap.Jeez...

She exits.

ZEUS(To Hera)

That was unnecessary.

HERAYour constantly screwing anything that moves isunnecessary.

ZEUSNow youre yelling just to yell.

HERAWhats the matter with that? You never listen to meanyway!

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 9.

ZEUSI...

He has no argument.

HERA

I thought so.

Enter Dionysus, alone.

DIONYSUSWhoops. Bad time?

HERAI was just leaving.

She exits.

ZEUS

(To Dionysus)Wheres Apollo?

DIONYSUS(As he crosses behind the bar)

Tutor.

ZEUSTutor?

DIONYSUSYeah. Someone named Abacus. Guess hes really good atmath.

ZEUSMath?

DIONYSUSEh, Apollo dreams of producing a Broadway smash hit.Guess you need a bit of math for that. Money and all.

ZEUSI suppose.

DIONYSUSYou seem depressed. Cup of wine?

ZEUSNo, thanks. I have to go sort out the kid deal beforeHera gives me crap again.

DIONYSUSAh. Have fun.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 10.

Wordlessly, Zeus exits. Dionysus clears thegoblets that Zeus and Apollo have left. Enter

Artemis.

ARTEMISHi, Dionysus.

DIONYSUSArtemis! Hey, kiddo. Whats going on?

Artemis does not respond immediately. Dionysus pours her a goblet of wine, which she takes with asmall smile.

ARTEMISThanks.

Dionysus leans against the bar, a goblet of hisown in hand.

DIONYSUSI get the feeling that something is on your mind.

ARTEMISI walked in on Dad and Hera fighting.

DIONYSUSYes, the Dynamic Duo are at it again.

ARTEMISWhat happened this time?

DIONYSUSYou dont know?

(Artemis shakes her head.)Heras ticked off cause Zeus had another kid.

ARTEMISOh. That.

DIONYSUSSo you did hear?

ARTEMISBits and pieces.

DIONYSUSWell, then. No use in repeating what you already know.Ill leave that to your mother.

(Artemis laughs.)Hey, cheer up, Artemis. Thingsll work themselves out.And if they dont...well, Uncle Hades would know betterthan little old me.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 11.

ARTEMIS(Putting her hand on his)

Thanks, Dionysus.

DIONYSUSHey, Im here for you, kiddo.

(Beat)And speaking of kiddo, I wonder how Zeus new kid willturn out.

ARTEMISProbably going to wind up a hero.

DIONYSUSSeriously, right? I swear, Zeus needs to take aparenthood class. Always pitting his kids againstmonsters...or worse.

ARTEMIS

Worse?

DIONYSUSSetting them up on dates. Remember what happened withyou and Pan?

ARTEMIS(Recoiling in horror of the memory)

Oh, the Goat Man!

DIONYSUSExactly.

(Beat.)

Did I ever tell you about the time Zeus set me up witha Gorgon?

Lights down.

Scene 4

Lights up on the Council Chamber, where Athenasits at the table working on a laptop. Enter

Apollo, with a small hammer, chisel, and a smallstone tablet in his hands.

APOLLOAthena, can I ask you a math question?

ATHENAOf course, Apollo.

(Apollos gaze is fixated on thecomputer.)

Whats wrong?

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 12.

APOLLOWhat is that thing?

ATHENAThis? Its my new GodBook Pro from Golden Apple.

Apollo sits.

APOLLOWhat does it do?

ATHENAYou can write documents on it, buy and sell stocks onit, just about anything. And you dont have to leavethe comfort of your chair.

(She shifts uncomfortably in her chair.)Though now that I think of it, these seats are horribleon my tailbone.

APOLLOThats awesome! Ill definitely look into it.

ATHENAMhm. Anyway. Question.

APOLLORight! Um...whats the square root of negative nine?

ATHENAThree "i", where "i" is an imaginary value.

APOLLO

Damn it. Now I have to get a new tablet for the rightanswer.

ATHENAWhat did you have?

APOLLOWell, Abacus told me it was negative three.

ATHENAThats absurd. Everyone knows that a negative number isa positive when squared.

APOLLOWell, excuse me, but I didnt.

ATHENAWho did you say told you?

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 13.

APOLLOWell, not told. More...guided me through the problem.Tutored is the word.

ATHENAMy mistake, then. Who tutored you?

APOLLOAbacus.

ATHENAAbacus.

APOLLO(Jovially)

Yup!

ATHENAWell, Athena says Abacus is a tool.

Apollo rises, offended.

APOLLOYou have no right to say that, Athena! You dont knowAbacus! Who are you to judge?

ATHENARelax, Apollo. I jest.

APOLLONo. You cant insult someone and cover it up so easily.For your information, Abacus is very smart, and veryunique. Were going to produce a Broadway hit together!Just you watch!

With a flourish, Apollo turns his back and skipsoffstage.

ATHENA(Unsure of how to take Apollosoutburst)

...Right... Back to Solitaire.

Lights down. Exit Athena, but enter Apollo for thenext scene.

Scene 5

Lights up. Apollo is sitting alone at the otherend of the table, drawing with crayons. We cannotsee what. He seems somewhat distracted, and we seea brimming wastebasket next to him. Enter Artemiswith a small rabbit in her hands.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 14.

APOLLO(Mumbling to himself)

Little more green...

ARTEMISWhy hello there, twin.

APOLLOHey, Artemi...

(Seeing the rabbit)Holy crap, that is adorable.

ARTEMIS(Stroking/scratching the rabbit)

Isnt he? I saw a coyote chasing him while I was outhunting.

APOLLOWhat did you do?

ARTEMISI killed the coyote.

APOLLO(Somewhat disgusted)

Ah.

Artemis laughs and crosses to him.

ARTEMISWhatcha drawing?

(Sees it)

Wow! That is really good!

Apollo holds up his drawing for the audience tosee. It is a flawless reproduction of the MonaLisa.

APOLLOYou think so? I feel like I used too much shading.

ARTEMISDa Vinci would be proud.

Apollo puts the drawing down.

APOLLOThanks, Artemis.

ARTEMISWhere did you learn to draw like that?

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 16.

Ares, holding the rabbit and playingwith it.)

Whos a cute little rab--(He notices Apollo looking at him.)

Ahem. Um... I caught someones rodent. Whose?

Apollo points to Artemis.

APOLLOHers. Tantrum.

ARESI figured.

Artemis lifts her head.

ARTEMISOf course Im the one with the bad temper!

(She slams her head back down)

Ow... Damn it...

ARESIll calm her down.

He crosses to her and picks her up, holding her ina firemans carry.

ARTEMISAres! What the hell are you doing!?

ARES(A la Schwarzenegger)

Get to the chariot!

He runs off, Artemis fussing. Apollo just standsthere, confused. Lights down. Position Eros on thetable for the next scene.

Scene 6

Lights up at Far Right. Dionysus and Poseidon areenjoying a couple of drinks together.

DIONYSUSHonestly, Uncle Poseidon, I have no idea where you getyour patience.

POSEIDONPatience? Have you seen me when I get angry?

DIONYSUSHonestly, I cant say I have.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 17.

POSEIDONLets just say the last time I got mad, my earthquakedestroyed a small island.

DIONYSUSOh.

(Pause)

But seriously. You are always keeping Uncle Hades fromripping Dads limbs off, and keeping Dad from rippingUncle Hades throat out.

POSEIDONKid, I grew up with them. I should know how to dealwith them.

Enter Zeus, followed by Hades. They are arguing.

ZEUSI dont want to hear it, Hades!

POSEIDON(Rising, glancing at his wrist)

Oh, look at my wrist. Time to finish off Antarctica.

HADESJust because youre the "King of the Gods" doesnt meanyou can do whatever the hell you want, Zeus.

He exits. Dionysus crosses around the bar andfollows him.

DIONYSUS(Exiting)

Hey, come on. Calm down.

Pause.

ZEUSI dont need a lesson in morality, Hades.

HADESZeus! For just once in your immortal life, listen toyour older brother, okay?

ZEUS

Why, Hades? All youve ever wanted to do was tear medown!

HADESZeus, when we were drawing lots to see who wouldcontrol what all those years ago, you cheated; neitherof us can deny that. But that has been, and remains,between us. Right now, Im lecturing you on whatsbetween you and your wife.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 18.

ZEUSYou sound like Dad.

HADESCronus? That old fart? I think not, kid.

ZEUS Oh yes, you do. Lecturing me on this and that. Ineither want nor need to hear it.

HADESFirst off, Zeus, we locked Dad and his pals in Tartarusafter he tried to eat us. Thousands of years ago. Henever lectured you before that, and you havent heardfrom him since. I, on the other hand, watch over himevery day. Part of my job in the Underworld. So, of thetwo of us, I have infinitely more knowledge as to what"sounding like Dad" is.

ZEUSProve me wrong. What does he sound like if he doesntlecture?

HADES(Imitating Cronus, their rather brutishfather)

"When I get these chains off, Im tearing your limbsoff, boy! You hear me? Off!"

ZEUS(Curious)

Wait, really?

HADESYeah. Really.

ZEUSOh.

HADESSecondly, you may not want to be lectured, but youcertainly need to be lectured. And since you dontlisten to your wife, I have to be the one to do it.

Enter Poseidon and Dionysus.

ZEUSYou know, for a guy who had to force a kidnap victim tomarry him, only sees her during the winter monthsbecause of a technicality, and still has no kids, youseem to know a lot about marriage counseling. Youshould start your own show.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 19.

Pause. Zeus has won. Hades scowls and turns away,noticing Dionysus and Poseidon.

DIONYSUSWhoops. Is this a bad time?

HADES

Oh no, not at all. If youll excuse me, I need to finda producer for my new show...

DIONYSUSIll deal with Uncle Hades.

He exits. Poseidon, now alone with Zeus, pulls upa chair and sits casually.

ZEUSBack so soon?

POSEIDON

Dionysus convinced me to bail you out again.

ZEUSAh.

POSEIDONI hate to say it, Zeus, but Hades is right.

ZEUSTraitor.

POSEIDONHear me out, Zeus. Please?

Zeus sighs.

ZEUSFine. Have at it.

POSEIDONI know Im not the best person to say this, since Ivehad my share of affairs with other women as well.

ZEUSYeah, except you had really poor taste.

POSEIDONHey, Athena turned Medusa into a monster after thefact, okay? Besides, she was killed thousands of yearsago. You can forget it now.

(Beat)What Im trying to get at is that Ive had my share offights with Amphitrite.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 20.

ZEUSWho?

POSEIDONAmphitrite. Sea Nymph. My wife.

ZEUS Ah.

POSEIDONWhom, by the way, pal, you still havent met. Why dontyou ever visit?

ZEUSBusy.

POSEIDONOh. Right. Pissing Hera off.

ZEUSHey!

POSEIDONSorry. Had to get one joke in. Cant let Hades have allthe fun.

ZEUSScrew you.

POSEIDONSorry.

(Beat)

But I digress. We need to figure out how to cleanthings up between you and Hera.

ZEUSAnd you know how?

POSEIDONNo, not me. But someone does.

ZEUSSomeone?

POSEIDONCome with me.

Lights down on Far Right as they cross to a darkCouncil Chamber. Enter Apollo and Hera from theother side.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 21.

APOLLOStay with me, Hera.

HERAWhys it dark in here?

ZEUS Hera?

HERAZeus?

Pretty lights start to flash and music starts to play, but soft enough for dialogue. We see Erosstanding on the table, complete with wings andbow.

EROS(Sings)

Eros!(He jumps down from the table andproceeds to speak naturally, though hisvoice is still very musical)

Its me! Im back again! Poseidon! Things are goingswimmingly, I hope? Good, good. Zeus! Muscle man thatyou are, hows things? Apollo, the thespian! Hope tosee you acting soon! Hera, darling, you look amazing!

The music stops. As Eros reacts, enter Artemis.

ARTEMISI accidentally bumped the stereo. Sorry.

(She notices Apollo)Oh. Bye, Apollo.

APOLLOArtemis, come on. Will you stop?

EROSWhy stop? Lifes about going, yes? Yes. Oh, the placesyoull go, eh? But you can only go if you start, and Ifeel something starting here!

He shoots Artemis and Apollo with his bow. Theyinstantly fall in love with each other. Poseidondoes another facepalm, and Hera screams and runsoff.

POSEIDONOh, son of a bitch...

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 22.

APOLLO(Singing)

Oh, sweet mystery of life, at last Ive found ye!

ARTEMIS(Singing)

At last I know the reason of it all!

ZEUSEros, you asshole! Reverse it!

Apollo and Artemis run towards each other andstage-kiss fervently.

EROSBut this is what love is all about!

POSEIDONTheyre twins, you moron! Brother and sister!

EROSWhat?

POSEIDONReverse it!

EROSBut I --

ZEUSReverse it, or so help me, I will use my lightningbolts.

EROSOkay, okay! Fine!

He shoots them again, and they stop.

ARTEMIS(Pulling away)

Ew! What the hell, Apollo!?

APOLLOIt wasnt me!

ARTEMISLike hell it wasnt!

APOLLOI dont know what happened!

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 24.

ZEUSOkay... Well, the boy knows that were deciding hisfate. Tonight is either his last night of a normallife, or it isnt.

APOLLO

I really hope there isnt any nervousness.

ATHENAFor us, or for the boy?

ARTEMISThe perverted, number-one twin meant the boy.

APOLLO(Dejected)

Im sorry, Artemis, okay? I really wish you wouldnthate me.

ARTEMISGo find Abacus. Maybe hell love you.

POSEIDONArtemis, stop it. Apollo, you too. Fighting isnt goingto get you anywhere.

ARESYes it will. Fighting is always productive.

ATHENAAres, you numb skull. Have you seen the United States?Be silent.

HADESParty pooper. No cake for you.

ZEUSThere wont be a party unless we get the issue of theboy sorted out. Here and now. Are we ready?

(There are murmurs of "sure" or "yes" or"whatever," etc.)

Athena, will you pass out the documents?

ATHENAOf course.

She rises and begins to hand everyone a sheet ofpaper.

ZEUSThats why youre my favorite.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 25.

ARTEMISWhat!? Its because shes smarter than me, isnt it?Now two people are cooler than me!!!

Athena sits.

ZEUS (Completely disregarding Artemis)As you can see, his name is Marcus. Brown hair, blueeyes, asthmatic, and has a rare strain of ear fungus.

HERAZeus. I thought you had better taste.

ZEUSShe was French, okay?

Ares laughs.

POSEIDON(Irritated)

Yeah. Its funny. Okay. Lets go.

HADESWhat happened, Zeus? Did she surrender when she sawyour -?

DIONYSUS(Interrupting)

Uncle Hades!

HADES

...I was going to say "rippling Olympian biceps."

DIONYSUSOh.

HADESMind out of the gutter, party boy.

ATHENAAnyway. What are we going to do about him?

APOLLOWho?

ARTEMISMarcus!

HERAKill him.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 26.

ZEUSNo.

ARESGive him a country, and then invade his country.

HERA Then kill him.

ZEUSNo.

ARTEMISI could use a hunting pal.

DIONYSUSThats not a bad idea, kiddo.

APOLLO

I want him to act for me when hunting seasons over.

ARTEMISDeal.

POSEIDONHeres a novel idea. How about we stop thinking aboutourselves and consider the kid?

Pause.

HERAI say we kill him.

HADESI second that.

ZEUSGo to hell, Hades.

HADESToo late, little man. You sent me there already.

ATHENAI think Earth needs a hero.

POSEIDONMy thoughts exactly.

ARESEarth is doomed. Theres no sense in the politicsanymore.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 27.

ARTEMISWhen have you ever cared about politics, Ares?

APOLLOI know. What are you and who are you doing?

(Pause)Damn it. I meant, "Who are you and what are you doing?"

ATHENAWe know.

ZEUSI hate to say it, but I agree with Ares. Besides, themortals dont believe in us anymore. What use are theyto us?

HADESAnd vice-versa.

ZEUS

Thats just you.

DIONYSUSHow about we ask the kid?

Pause.

ARESWhat?

DIONYSUSWhy dont we let the kid choose his own path in life?

Pause. No one has ever considered this before.

ATHENAWhy not?

APOLLOLet him write his own play.

ARTEMISCarve his own bow.

POSEIDON

I agree.

HERAJust so long as we dont have to go through this again.

DIONYSUS(Agreeing)

I heard that.

(CONTINUED)


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CONTINUED: 28.

ARESBut I like fighting.

ZEUSTrue, but at what cost?

HERA Are you actually considering this? You have changed.

POSEIDONIts decided, then. Marcus will choose his own destiny.

ZEUSNot quite, Poseidon. We still have Hades opinion toconsider.

HADESMe? Im cool with whatever. He winds up with me in theend anyway.

(He looks out at the audience.)I win.

ABACUS (V)(On a microphone at the back of thetheater)

And cut. Fantastic. Tomorrows opening night. See youthen.

Everyone relaxes and begins talking amongstthemselves. Only Apollo remains on stage.

APOLLO

And they thought we couldnt produce it.

ABACUS (V)Hey. Were unique, right?

APOLLOIndeed we are, Abacus.

Lights down.

ABACUS (V)Indeed we are.

Curtain Call and Company Bow

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Rash of the Titans