Poppy's Corner, A Christmas Story by Steven Donnini

8/14/2019 Poppy's Corner, A Christmas Story by Steven Donnini

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Poppys Corner

by Steven Donnini

by Steven DonniniCopyright 2004

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Introduction

Poppys Corner is a 24 hour urban Convenience Store

located in an inner city neighborhood of Buffalo, New York.

The store is small, with a counter, microwave, display

racks for chips, snacks, overhead racks for cigarettes,

soda, beer and wine coolers. The front of the counter is

tightly packed shelving containing packages of everything

from BC Powder to Kodak film. After midnight, Poppys

store becomes the Mecca of activity for the night crawlers

and lost souls from the old inner city streets.

I first walked into Poppys corner store on Niagara St. in

Buffalo, New York in 1970. It was a warm oasis on a frigid

Buffalo night. Poppys is the only neighborhood 24-hour

convenience store within many blocks, complete with a

counter, display racks for snacks, chips, candy, magazines,

beer, wine and soda coolers. Hanging from the ceiling are

racks of cigarettes, Kodak film, BC Powder, and cigarette

lighters. I bought a pack of Camel cigarettes and havent

been back until now. It hasnt changed much in 30 years.

Its still the after midnight Mecca for the night crawlers

and lost souls from the old eastside city streets. Poppy,

once a spry young Polish Jewish emigrant, is now house

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bound most of the time. He supervises his many convenience

stores by phone.

OMAR Lotta, night shift store manager in his fifties has no

illusions about life in the city after midnight. He has

seen all kinds of people come into the store over the years

and has developed his own way of dealing with problems.

OMAR, I learned that these animals would kill you for five

bucks, or just for fun. Now, when they take out a knife or

gun, I take things into my own hands. I call it my Black

Beauty. He holds up a black aluminum bat. Its the

cornerstone of my urban pacification system.

Poppy hired single mom SALLY Amagone as night shift cashier

to work with OMAR. She has a well-developed sense of

morality and is easy going by nature. Their shift starts

at 11:00 PM and ends at 7:00 AM.

The Holidays are always the time when family history and

new conflicts come to the surface. SALLY, My brother came

home for Christmas last year looking like a member of the

Skinheads, complete with a shaved head and Swastika

tattoos. He was pierced everywhere, including his penis

where he has tattooed that reads: Up with White Power.

When he tried to show it to everyone, Dad told him to

leave, before he lost his manhood forever.

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SALLY bets the agnostic OMAR, that before Christmas Day he

will witness a real miracle and it will be acknowledged by

a higher power. For 30 year old MITCH Alveraz, a regular

at Poppys, its always difficult being around family. But,

now things have gotten a lot hotter, because he ripped off

drug dealers to cover his young wifes hospital bill.

MITCH, I went to confession, the Priest said I was in

mortal danger and that I better put my affairs in order.

AUGGY Bazyki, 32, is a childhood friend of MITCH and a

Poppys regular. They have grown up on the same street,

went to school together, and have been busted together many

times for a few misdemeanor crimes and a petty drug

possession, a marijuana joint. AUGGY battles manic

depression (Bipolar Disorder). AUGGY comes into Poppys

one night, desperate for money. He pulls out a gun and

demands money from SALLY. OMAR quickly disarms him, to

discover its a life like plastic toy gun. AUGGY cant

afford to get arrested again, so OMAR lets him go, after

all it was a toy gun. AUGGY, Poppy has been ripping me

off for years, its time I got something back. There are

always the store videotapes that Poppys likes to look at.

Every time theres an armed robbery in the store the

insurance goes up, so they keep the tapes and dont call

the police unless theres gunfire or someone gets

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assaulted. AUGGYS robbery attempt is one of those times

when its better for everyone to just forget it. Then, one

night before Christmas, MITCHS drug dealing friends come

looking for him at Poppys. Two-Step (Mora Edelstein)

enters the store for a pack of cigarettes. Nearly fifty,

she looks like she stepped out of the 60s. She turned out

to be what everyone was warned they would become if they

didnt stop taking drugs. After a stroke, caused by crack

cocaine use, left her right leg limp, everyone started to

call her Two-Step. Because, she had to take two steps to

keep up with everyone else. Later, the drug dealers arrive

at Poppys.

They drive by and fire their guns into the store breaking

glass windows and wine bottles. When the shooting was over

MITCH, SALLY, and OMAR are all hunkereddown on the floor

behind the counter. Two-Step was gone, and there was a

blood trail going out the backdoor leading into the alley.

OMAR calls Poppy to report the events of the night. Hes

concerned that the store could loose its NY State Alcohol

License because of the shooting. They agree they must file

a police report.

It is Christmas Eve, SALLY and OMAR have just started their

shift.

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MITCH comes in for a pack of smokes. SALLY asks, So,

whats your story for the Narcotics Anonymous group?

MITCH answers, This is the way I tell it in group. It was

a cold winter night and a Puerto Rican drug gang was after

me, so I took shelter in Poppys Corner Store. They came

to the store for me and drove by shooting bullets through

the store-hitting TWO-STEP in the chest. It traveled

straight through her lung. Blood squirted everywhere,

thats when I had my moment of clarity. Then, I knew I had

to stop doing drugs. I had to do something different,

otherwise like they say at NA, I was going to jail or the

morgue, one or the other. The Buffalo Police arrested me.

When I stood in front of the judge, I said that I was sorry

that I had caused so much pain to my family and to TWO-

STEP. He asked me who TWO-STEP was, so I explained that

she had a stroke from rock cocaine. I told him about the

shooting. He said its a miracle that shes still alive.

OMAR sums up the story I think SALLY was right about some

things, at least the part about it being a miracle that

TWO-STEP survived a bullet through her lung.

MITCH, well, he has a tendency for creating misfortune for

everyone around him. Maybe a job in the health insurance

industry or a full time rehab counselor position would get

him off the street.

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AUGGY packs more mischief, pound for pound, than anyone I

know. Its not because hes bipolar, although Im sure

that doesnt help matters. Hes got no direction or

impulse control.

TWO-STEP? I think things would have worked out differently

if she had stopped using pot, crack cocaine and LSD. At

one time, she wasnt a bad looking girl.

SALLY is right about me though, Im a Scorpio and its hell

when I cant find someone to fight with. Fortunately, this

time of the year there are lots of opportunities to fight

with my family. It isnt that I dont like my family, its

that I cant stand to be around them for more than 3 hours

a year or I get a sick feeling in my gut.

Every once in a while someone like SALLY will surprise me.

I dont agree with most of her religious dogma, but she has

a gift, an unexpected kindness that causes a lot of strange

feelings in me. I think its only right to have more than

one miracle in a Christmas story even if the people dont

deserve it.

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Poppys Corner

By Steven D. Donnini

Library Of Congress

WGACopyright Steven Donnini 2004

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Setting

Poppys Corner (24 hour) urban Convenience Store

Buffalo, NY.

The store is small, with a counter, microwave, display

racks for chips, snacks, cooler for drinks (pop, beer,

wine) and overhead racks for cigarettes. The front of

the counter is tightly packed shelving and packages of

everything from BC power to Kodak film.

After midnight, Poppys store becomes the Mecca of

activity for the night crawlers and lost souls from

the city streets.

CHARACTERS

Jack OMAR Lotta

Fifty year old, Iranian night shift convenience store

manager with no illusions about life in the city.

SALLY Amagone

35 year old night shift cashier with easy nature and a

well developed sense of morality.

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MITCH (Michael Alveraz)

30 year old Puerto Rican drug user, trafficker, store

customer. He has a history petty crimes.

AUGGY Bazycki

He is a 25 year old store customer that battles manic

depression (Bipolar Disorder).

TWO-STEP (Mora Edelstien).

A 35-year-old woman that looks like she stepped out of

the 60s. Shes become a spaced out crack head and

frequent store customer.

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INTERIOR POPPYS STORE NIGHT

Midnight at Poppys Convenience Store, Omar is

stocking the cigarettes over the counter. Sally is

counting money for the safe drop. The store is

decorated with Holiday lights and dcor.

OMAR

The Holidays are here again. When I was

a kid Iran it was fun but now. Forget it.

SALLY

I havent started shopping for my kid.

Cole doesnt seem to give a damn about

Jenny. He calls and tells her hell pick

her up a 5:00 and then he doesnt show.

He gets drunk with his friends at the

restaurant he works at.

He always preferred barfly friends to family.

OMAR

Family is highly over rated. I dont knowtoo many people that can honestly say

that they would love to live next door

to their family members.

SALLY

What about your Mom? She seems very sweet.

Whenever she calls I enjoy talking with her.

OMAR

I love my Mom! But, I dont want to live

with her.

SALLY

Dont you want to see your sisters at

Christmas?

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OMAR

Yeah. Well thats a different story.

It all depends on which one. We had a

falling out when my older sister gave

up Islam and became a Krishna Hindu.

SALLY

As in Hare Krishna?

OMAR

Like the ones wrapped

with the pink cloth, selling the

Hindu books about their Lord Krishna.

She went to live in San Francisco in

1972. They must have got her in an airport

or shopping mall. Its communal, they

all pray, eat and live together.

She acts as if shes stoned all the time.

Theres a lot of preying, dancing and Curry.

SALLY

How did the rest of the family take it?

OMAR

Well, it was quite the sight at the dinner

table Thanksgiving Day. Half the family is

Christian. The other half is Islamic.

When sister showed up Hindu, my Mother

tried not to look at her.

SALLY

Sounds like a Norman Rockwell moment.

OMAR

There was my sister wrapped in pink from

her shaved head to her dirty toes.

My corn fed Christian Fundamentalists,

had their own kind of hand signals

to express displeasure. Their kids just

couldnt take their eyes off her.

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SALLY

My brother came home for Christmas last

year looking like a member of the

Manson family. Complete with shaved

head and Swastikas tattoos. He was

pierced everywhere, including his penis

where he has a tattooed Up with White Power.

When he tried to show it to everyone,

my Dad told the stupid fool to

leave.

OMAR

Ive been called a fool, but

not a stupid fool.

Thats got to hurt.

SALLY

Well, my Mom started crying and wouldnt

talk for the rest of the day.

OMAR

I meant the tattooing and piercing

his penis.

SALLY

Im sure it did. Yahweh bless him.

OMAR

How do you know Yahweh would bless him?

SALLY

I know you dont believe in Jesus.Ill make a bet with you that before

Christmas youll be a believer.

OMAR

Youre on. Whats the bet?

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SALLY

He will make his presence known and

you will give me three nights off work.

If he doesnt, Ill cover for you

for three nights.

OMAR

Youve got a bet.

SALLY

You will be a witness to a supernatural

event. A miracle.

OMAR

All right! Its snowing again.

The last time it came down like this

was in 97.

SALLY

Yeah. That was some storm.

OMAR

Thats the winter I almost lost myeyesight.

SALLY

Thats scary.

OMAR

It was OK after a few weeks.

But I had to wear blinders on my eyes

the whole time.

SALLY

What happened?

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OMAR

I was working in Poppys, Main street store,

and this punk came in to rob me.

I told him to go get a job and he

stabbed me right here and thumbed me

in the eyes. Then he took all the cash.

(OMAR shows a scar on his stomach.)

SALLY

Thats why I dont carry lots of cash.

So, what happened?

OMAR

I learned that these animals would kill

you just for fun.

Now, when they take out a knife or gun,

I take things into my own hands.

SALLY

What happened to your ear?

(SALLY points to OMAR half missing ear.)

OMAR

One night at the Pelican Bar and

I got drunk.

SALLY

Yeah and

OMAR

I got in a fight with a punk and hecut my ear like this.

The piece of ear fell under a table

or something, we never did find it.

The place was full of rats.

(OMAR leans to her to show off the sliced off ear.)

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SALLY

Thats OK you dont need to show me.

I used to work in the ER at Buffalo General.

You wouldnt believe it.

Saturday nights the blood would get all over

the floors. Ive seen it all, knifings,

shootings, car accidents

and over doses. After two years,

I had seen more than enough.

(AUGGY walks in the door and shakes of the snow from his

parker.)

AUGGY

Wow! Man, its winterized out there.

This is why people go to Florida.

SALLY

Where have you been? Havent seen you

in a while.

AUGGY

In the lock up.

SALLY

What did you do?

OMAR

Why ask?

(AUGGY is walking around the store in circles.)

AUGGY

A bogus bust. But its 30 days

of clean clothes, warm bed and 3 meals a day.

Praise the lord. Give me a quart of

Bull and a pack of Kools.

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OMAR looks at AUGGY with suspicion.

OMAR

You got cash?

AUGGY stops walking and cocks his head back.

AUGGY

Just enough to get bye.

SALLY with little concern.

SALLY

You dont look so good.

OMAR

Theres crank on the street. (Goading)

AUGGY

Youre the man. (Angry)

AUGGY pays for his cigarettes and beer and leaves the

store.

SALLY

Why do you always ride him?

OMAR

These people are all the same.

(His face expressing the apathy of the street)

When they get into the rock cocaine.

Theyll do anything.

SALLY

Bless them.

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OMAR

I have to wait on them, but I dont

have to care about them. Theres all

kinds of losers out there.

Lazy losers,

Stupid losers,

smart ass losers

and poor lotto losers.

I want to be a rich lotto winner.

SALLY

Theyre harmless.

OMAR

Harmless? Bullshit, they dont know

I have the anti theft,

urban pacification system?

OMAR lifts a black aluminum baseball bat from behind

the counter, his arms covered with tattoos.

SALLY

Since, Ive been here you havent

needed it.

OMAR

When I first started working for Poppy,

I was robbed every damn week.

It was the same gang.

Word travels fast when youre a push over.

After the first month I wised up.

SALLY

OH?OMAR

One night a couple of balloon heads

came in, they didnt look good to me.

So, before they had a chance to pull

a gun or knife I asked them to leave.

They gave me some lip

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so I gave them some fat lip.

OMAR swings the bat.

SALLY

They know we dont have much cash

in the till.

OMAR

$200 will buy enough rock for a day.

SALLY

Most of them just want to come in and

get a pack of smokes.

OMAR walks over to the door and opens it for TWO-STEP.

SALLY

What can I do for you?

TWO-STEP

A pack of Winston please.

SALLY

Isnt it cold out there?

TWO-STEP shakes off the snow like a dog.

TWO-STEP

Yeah. Its a tight cold, with the

wind and all.

SALLY

Were expecting more snow tonight.

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TWO-STEP

I need to warm up a bit, before I go home.

OMAR

Stick around we could use the company.

So, Whats up with Yahweh? What about

Jahovah?

SALLY

Yahweh is the real name of God.

The J in Jehovah didnt exist until

200 years ago.

TWO-STEP

Bless you. People should use a persons

real name.

OMAR

(Pointing at TWO-STEP)

Youd think that Yahweh would have

taken better care of her.

SALLY

The Lord works to teach everyone about compassion.

TWO-STEP

I dont blame Yahweh for my disability.

OMAR

Howd you get so messed up?

TWO-STEP

It wasnt me that caused it.

SALLY

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Its the way it is. We all have a

place in Yahwehs grand plan.

OMAR

Yahweh is into selling cigarettes

and beer? Im supposed to be stuck

in this place from 12 midnight until 8

in the morning, because Yahweh wants

me to learn something?

SALLY

Yeah looks that way.

TWO-STEP

When I was in the hospital after the

stroke, I saw angels.

OMAR

Right, I saw Santa Claus standing

on the street begging for money.

SALLY

So, you dont have to see everythingthat way.

TWO-STEP

Some other people see Angels and

believe they are real.

OMAR

I can see this conversation is goingto evolve into a Bible Story.

Maybe it will be put into a future

version of the Bible.

SALLY

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You dont have to believe in Jesus.

But he is the only way youre going

to go to heaven.

OMAR

I thought I had found heaven when

I met Rita.

TWO-STEP

You cant find heaven through another

person.

OMAR

You just said that I could find heaven

through Jesus.

SALLY

Jesus was the Son of Yahweh. Other people

are just people.

OMAR

I have been bathed in the blood ofthe lamb, just like you.

SALLY

Oh?

OMAR

When I was 13, my oldest sister

was drawn into a group of Christian

Fundamentalists.

SALLY

So, whats so bad about that?

OMAR

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My parents are old school Islamic,

they thought it would be good for me

to get away from the gang I was

hanging with in.

OMAR

They enrolled me in an Islamic youth camp.

SALLY

Was it a good experience?

OMAR

I ran away after 3 days. I just

didnt get it. The whole thing was

about getting from one meeting to

another. Its all gibberish to me.

If Allah really cared about me,

things would have been different.

TWO-STEP

Ill pray for you.

OMAR

No thanks. Ill do my own praying.

Im afraid youll screw it up.

SALLY

Jesus is always there when youre ready.

OMAR

So, are Jack Daniels and Disneyland?

TWO-STEP

I used to feel that way.

SALLY

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I think we need some music around here,

to lighten things up.

OMAR

Oh Jesus, not the Mormons.

Id rather listen to the Hare Krishnas.

How about, the Pope Sings Album?

SALLY turns on CD of Christmas music.

TWO-STEP

I like it.

OMAR

Ive got to change the security tapes.

OMAR takes a box of VHS tape and walks into the back

room.

SALLY

I think his family has hurt him.

TWO-STEP

My family is still in town.

They call me all the time wanting

money to help support Mom.

SALLY

Oh.

TWO-STEP

Its hard enough to take careof myself.

SALLY

Yeah, me too.

TWO-STEP

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I still feel guilty.

SALLY

My Moms in a nursing home.

The other day an old man tried to

get in bed with her.

Shes a double amputee.

She called for help. The nurse came

to her rescue. Thank Yahweh.

TWO-STEP

I thought that I was going to be

placed in a home by the state.

SALLY

Why is that?

TWO-STEP

Well, I was using rock. Ive been

arrested more times than I can remember.

SALLY

Did you think about quitting?

TWO-STEP

The last time the judge said I was

going to jail or to rehab or placed

in a state home for the insane.

SALLY

So, you choose rehab?

TWO-STEP

Yeah, it was so hard on my brain.

I got some rock from another inmate.

They told me I had a stroke.

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But I think they just wanted to slow

me down with some other drugs.

I blew a gasket.

OMAR walks back into the store from the back room.

OMAR

Have you tried the new scratch off

game from the Lotto?

TWO-STEP

Nope.

OMAR

Its just a buck. Try one.

Its called Big Pig.

If you scratch three little

pigs you win.

TWO-STEP

All right.

OMAR pulls out a roll of playing cards and tears oneoff. He hands one to TWO-STEP.

She eagerly scrapes away the soft silver covering from

the card on the countertop.

TWO-STEP

Im a winner. It says so right here.

Three little pigs.

OMAR

(Incredulous) Let me see that.

He looks at the card for some time.

OMAR

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Looks like your $35 dollars richer.

Sign the back and Ill give you

the cash.

SALLY

Great. I havent seen a winner yet.

Youre the first.

TWO-STEP

That calls for a celebration.

SALLY

Whats your pleasure?

TWO-STEP

Ill take caf mocha, and a sweet roll.

OMAR

Want to try your luck again.

SALLY

Do you want the sweet roll heated?

TWO-STEP

Sure.

SALLY puts the sweet roll in the microwave.

MITCH opens the front door and enters looking edgy.

OMAR

Hi. Whats happening man?

MITCH

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Im stressed out.

MITCH waves OMAR to him as he walks to the back of the

store.

OMAR

Yeah?

MITCH

Come here.

SALLY

Hi there.

OMAR

So?

MITCH

These guys are out to kill me.

OMAR

What the happened?

MITCH

I told you about my wife getting sick.

OMAR

OK. I remember. That was a while ago.

MITCH

Well I didnt have any health

insurance. She didnt want to go to

county hospital so I had to do a deal.

It was woman stuff, you know.

The surgery was $40,000.

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OMAR

What are you talking about?

MITCH

These guys needed someone to deliver

a package and collect money in Detroit.

So, I did it and got ripped off.

I came back empty handed.

OMAR

Oh shit your screwed. Theyre going

to kill you.

MITCH

I gave them back $10,000.

But that isnt going to do it

for them. They want it all. Now.

OMAR

Where did you get $10,000?

MITCH

Thats confidential. My wife hasbeen answering the phone and

listening to what theyre going

to do to her if I dont pay.

OMAR

Who is it?

MITCH

Recco is the one that Im mostafraid of. Hes killed guys before.

OMAR

Can you send your wife out of

town for a while?

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MITCH

She said that if she leaves,

it would be for good.

OMAR

Maybe thats not so bad.

She got you into this in the

first place.

MITCH

You know how much I love her.

OMAR

Be realistic she is 25 years old

and youre too old.

MITCH

I know, but I love her. You know

what its like.

OMAR

Women want two things from older

guys like us. Sex and Security.Thats all. The love thing is all

about what we want and they play to it.

MITCH

I believe she loves me.

OMAR

For woman love is a matter of

convenience.Let me buy you a beer.

OMAR walks behind the counter and opens a bottle of

Rolling Rock and hands it to MITCH.

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MITCH

Thanks.

SALLY

Youre not going to drink that

in the store?

OMAR

Its cold out. Give the guy a break.

SALLY

The sign says, No alcohol Consumption,

No Guns, in this store.

OMAR

I dont see any open bottle.

SALLY

If a cop sees him, youre in trouble,

not me.

OMAR

So what?

SALLY

So, Poppy told me, dont ever let

anyone drink beer or wine in the store.

OMAR

Poppy isnt here. Right?

MITCH

I dont see him.

OMAR

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Give it a rest, its the Holidays.

TWO-STEP

Hes right, its Holiday time.

Lets party!

SALLY

Not me.

OMAR opens the cooler.

OMAR

What do you folks want to drink?

TWO-STEP

B&J tropical wine cooler.

MITCH

Give me a Bull.

OMAR

What if your new friends from

Detroit show up?

MITCH

Ill slide out the back.

SALLY

Ill have a Yoo-Hoo.

AUGGY walks in the front door.

OMAR

Didnt expect you back so soon.

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AUGGY

Its dropped 10 degrees.

SALLY

Join the party.

AUGGY

Dont mind if I do.

OMAR

Whats your pleasure? The drinks are

on the house.

AUGGY pulls out a gun from inside his old army coat.

AUGGY

Give me all the money in the cash

register.

SALLY

Oh my.

OMAR

What the are you doing?

AUGGY

I mean it. Get over there and put

all the cash in a bag.

OMAR

No way.

SALLY

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OK. Just dont point that thing at

anyone. It could go off.

AUGGY

You all think Im crazy and

youre right.

OMAR

Dont give him a dime.

AUGGY

Do you want me to shoot you?

SALLY

No. You dont need to do that.

Ill give you the money.

OMAR

No dont. Poppy will fire us.

SALLY

Do I care?

AUGGY

Im in a hurry. Dont screw around.

OMAR

We know you. The police will be

looking for you.

AUGGY

Poppy has been ripping me off for

Years. Its time I got something back.

SALLY

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What are you talking about?

AUGGY

You charge 20 cents more than anywhere

else for a pack of cigarettes and

50 cents more for beer.

OMAR

Tell me where you can go around here

for a beer and cigarettes in the

middle of the night?

AUGGY

So what? Whats the difference?

Its still a pack of cigarettes.

OMAR

But, when you want them bad enough

you pay more.

AUGGY

So its all about taking advantage

of me because I need them.

MITCH

Thats called Capitalism. Put people

down, hold them down, and charge

them more for a simple pleasure.

TWO-STEP

Yeah. We have nowhere else to go

at this time of the night.So, while Poppy sleeps we pay more.

OMAR

The point is, this is Poppys store.

MITCH

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Then why are you giving stuff away?

SALLY

Its the holiday season.

OMAR

See you cant show a little

Holiday sprit without it getting

you in trouble.

AUGGY

I still want the money.

OMAR

Go ahead shoot me.

AUGGY

So you want me to shoot?

SALLY

Please put the gun down.

Ill get the money.

OMAR

Im the store manager, I say, no way.

MITCH

Shoot him in the butt.

AUGGY

Why would I do that?

MITCH

That way he wont die.

AUGGY

36


37/89

Id rather shoot him in the foot.

MITCH

No too messy.

OMAR

How would you both like to meet

Black Beauty?

AUGGY

Whats that?

MITCH

Its the baseball bat he keeps behind

the counter.

AUGGY

Im getting sick of all this bullshit

talk. Hand it over.

SALLY

Theres only $28 in the register.

TWO-STEP

Jesus, thats hardly worth getting

in trouble over.

AUGGY

Everybody just shut up.

SALLY

Dont get upset. Now theres always

another way to get what you need.

OMAR

37


38/89

If youre going to shoot me, go for it.

AUGGY

I know how to use this.

OMAR

I bet it isnt even loaded.

AUGGY

Here see.

AUGGY points the pistol at the floor and pulls the

trigger. The hammer clicks, but nothing happens.

OMAR

See, I told you.

SALLY

I knew you didnt want to shoot anyone.

SALLY reaches into her purse and takes out a $20 bill.

OMAR

No. Dont give him anything.

SALLY

Hell pay me back. Right AUGGY.

AUGGY

Sure. When I get my check on the 15th

.

OMAR

Hes what I call a Mama Moocher.

TWO-STEP

38


39/89

Hes just trying to get by.

MITCH

I say let Black Beauty do the talking.

As long as Ive known you, Ive never

seen you with a gun. Hit him!

Knock some sense into him.

OMAR

No body is going to hit anybody.

I dont want the hassle. We dont

want a trip to the Emergency Room.

Give me that gun before you

get yourself killed.

AUGGY hands OMAR the gun.

AUGGY

I didnt really want to hurt anyone.

The phone rings. SALLY picks it up.

SALLY

Hello! Hi Poppy its kind of late for

you, whats up?

Its a slow night because of the

snowstorm.

Hows the family?

OMAR

Hes just checking to see if someone

is here.

SALLY

Dont worry, everything is fine,

have a good night.

SALLY puts the phone back on the wall mount.

39


40/89

TWO-STEP

That old man knows where every penny is.

MITCH

Is he a Jew?

OMAR

I think hes from Armenia or Serbia.

All I know is that hes been good to me.

SALLY

Why do you care where he came from?

MITCH

Just look around at all the stores,

the owners are Jews or Pakistanis.

TWO-STEP

What about the Koreans? There are lots

of them that own shops too.

AUGGY

Yeah. They got lots of money from

selling that knock off stuff.

OMAR

Why dont Puerto Ricans own shops?

AUGGY

I wasnt going to hurt nobody.

SALLY

So, what are we going to do?

OMAR

40


41/89

Hes harmless.

SALLY

But, Poppy looks at all the store tapes.

OMAR

Ill explain that he was just kidding

and that it was a plastic gun.

SALLY

Arent we on tape now?

OMAR

Why the change of heart?

SALLY

Well, he had the gun pointed at us,

now he doesnt.

OMAR

Yeah. So lets just pretend everythingis OK. Theres no sound recording.

Poppy didnt want to pay more for

the microphone to be installed.

AUGGY

Sorry, I didnt mean for you all to

get in trouble.

OMAR

The only person thats in trouble is

MITCH.

MITCH

What?

41


42/89

OMAR

Tell them.

MITCH

I dont want to.

OMAR

MITCH has a Puerto Rican drug gang

looking for him. Thats why he

cant go home.

MITCH

Its a little misunderstanding.

OMAR

Mister wise guy here got ripped off

by some drug guys in Detroit and now

the guys that own the stuff are going

to kill him if he doesnt come

up with $30,000. Is that about right?

SALLY

So, now youre a drug dealer?

MITCH

Fuck No. I was just moving it for

enough money to pay for my wives

surgery. They ripped me off.

TWO-STEP

If they see you here theyll kill

all of us.

AUGGY

42


43/89

Oh Yeah!

MITCH

How would you know?

OMAR

Because hes a fuck up too.

MITCH

They wont want to be seen.

SALLY

So, Youre going to hide until they

kill your wife?

OMAR

Of course, thats what he is doing.

SALLY

Send her to Puerto Rico until things

blow over.

MITCH

She wont go. She would never leave

her mother alone. Besides, these

guys dont forgive or forget.

TWO-STEP

Dont you get tired of the hassle?

AUGGY

Every day.

SALLY

43


44/89

What if I told you theres a way out

of all this?

OMAR

Here comes the fish people story.

TWO-STEP

Let her talk.

SALLY

Jesus was born to save you from

all this.

AUGGY

And you read this in the Bible?

SALLY

Yes, at church Bible study.

OMAR

Its only a story some guys John,

Isaiah and Ezekiel wrote.

AUGGY

I wonder what they were smoking.

MITCH

Christmas is about getting people

deeper in debt.

SALLY

You must be one of those liberals

that believe government should take

care of you or that the credit card

makes you use it.

MITCH

44


45/89

Ill tell you, Ezekiel cant get

these gangsters off my ass.

OMAR

The Church changes the good book

every few years. The New Revised

Fundamentalists Version number two.

TWO-STEP

Everybody is afraid that Yahweh doesnt

really exist. So we cant live up to

what we are told is right.

Personally I like the Baptist.

Its simple you do it their way or

you burn in hell.

MITCH

Look at you. Do you think if there

was a Jesus that he would have

healed you?

TWO-STEP

It was that hospital that did this

to me. Theyve got some powerful drugs

there. They can kiss my ass.

SALLY

Jesus can save you from a life of torment

and an eternity in hell.

OMAR

Then why are you here in the middle

of all this?

SALLY

45


46/89

I dont know. But, I know youre

going to hell.

AUGGY

Im an expert on that.

MITCH

I went to confession and the Priest

said I was in mortal danger and that

I better put my affairs in order.

AUGGY

Minga! Youre going to hell for sure.

SALLY

Not if he takes Jesus in his heart.

Ah, The Catholic Church is all

about rituals.

OMAR

So, all the Catholics, Jews and Arabs

are going to hell. What a bunch ofbull shit.

SALLY

Well yes. Im afraid so.

TWO-STEP

Its going to be hot and crowded.

Based on what Ive seen.

OMAR

Look, the only thing that matters is

that you have enough cash to get by.

Not having money is hell.

46


47/89

SALLY

Believe what you want now. But when the

end comes youll change your mind.

My Dad was a life long atheist and in

his final moments, he accepted Jesus

into his heart.

TWO-STEP

We will all cover our bets at that point.

MITCH

Do you know where I can stay for a

few weeks?

AUGGY

You know what Id do?

MITCH

What?

AUGGY

Run to Puerto Rico and hide.

The gangs dont like to go there.

OMAR

Hes right. If you go to Puerto Rico

they wont find you.

MITCH

I know an artist that was selling

weed in the city for $2,000 an ounce.

He was making so much cashthat he couldnt put it into a bank.

So, he bought six acres in Puerto Rico.

Over the years he transported backpacks

of cash to his concrete bunker in

the hills overlooking a US Navy

gunnery range.

47


48/89

OMAR

Go to the DEA and tell your

story and see if theyll help.

MITCH

Like a snitch?

AUGGY

You may have to shop your story around.

MITCH

If the DEA doesnt like your story,

then take it to the District Attorneys

Office, or the FBI, DIA, CIA, or

the Homeland Security guys.

Then take the best deal.

OMAR

Ive heard that you get relocated

and set up. Even paid cash.

You just cant talk to anyone

in your family, ever.

MITCH

That wont work with my wife. Shes a

blabbermouth.

AUGGY

If you cant trust her, why did you

marry her?

MITCH

I didnt know.

SALLY

You need some family therapy.

48


49/89

MITCH

We tried that. I couldnt get a word

in edge wise. All she talked about

was her problem with her father.

And how controlling I am.

SALLY

She was just, you know venting.

OMAR

Yeah, I went to therapy, after my first

divorce.

SALLY

There see, Im sure you have changed.

AUGGY

How many times have you been married?

OMAR

4 times.

SALLY

I think I spoke too soon.

OMAR

I learned they all had things in common.

SALLY

Go on, what?

OMAR

They all had the same name. Rita.

I have a thing about the name Rita.

The Ritas looked alike and after a

while they all sounded like my mother.

49


50/89

MITCH

Theyre all named Rita?

OMAR opens his wallet and shows the photos of his

Ritas and children.

OMAR

Here look for yourself.

SALLY

This is news to me. Let me see the photos.

OMAR

Their mostly my kids.

SALLY

Are these photos in order?

OMAR

Yeah, I do that so I can keep track.

MITCH

You must have to pay a bundle in support.

OMAR

Thats mostly over now. I maybe the

only man who didnt learn anything

from getting divorced.

SALLY

(looking at photos)

I cant tell them apart.

OMAR

On my 45th birthday, all the Ritas

got together and took me to court.

50


51/89

MITCH

Oh man! Thats the worst.

OMAR

Well, the judge gave them my

business to divide between them.

So, I had to sell out to my partner.

SALLY

What kind of business was it?

OMAR

A concrete construction company.

MITCH

What a kick in the nads.

OMAR

Theyve gone through all the money,

in the last few years.

SALLY

So, thats why youre working here.

OMAR

Low overhead. I find its best

to fly below the radar when it

comes to ex wives.

SALLY

See you have learned somethingfrom these women.

OMAR

Self preservation comes to the rescue.

TWO-STEP

51


52/89

I hear you.

MITCH

Thats why I dont want to get divorced.

AUGGY

I havent found the right woman.

SALLY

She will need to be a special lady.

TWO-STEP

Ive got just the right woman for you.

AUGGY

No way.

TWO-STEP

You havent even seen her.

How can you say that?

AUGGY

Well. I want her to find me.

Besides I learned early on that

women are like ducks.

When they hang out together they

look alike. No offence.

TWO-STEP

So, put a want ad in the personal ads.

OMAR

A wannabe-armed robber looking for

a 25 year old, tall, beautiful, woman

with steady job.

52


53/89

SALLY

Thats not nice. Kindness matters.

MITCH

Let me take a shot at it. 35-year-old

professional bachelor, looking for

romance with a woman of means.

AUGGY

I like that one. Women like romance.

SALLY

Thats misrepresenting yourself.

AUGGY

Everybody does it, in the beginning,

at least for the first six months or so.

OMAR

I hear that. Rita #1 was a compulsive

gambler. I didnt know until we went

to Vegas.

SALLY

Wow. So was my ex. Hes a very smart

guy. Just ask him, hell tell you all

about his Law Degree from NYU.

He fizzled out after he got the diploma.

OMAR

We went on our honeymoon in Vegas.

She never left the casino.

MITCH

How much did she loose?

OMAR

53


54/89

$19,000.

SALLY

Cole lost a bowling alley in a card

game in Atlantic City.

AUGGY

How can you loose a bowling alley?

SALLY

Very easily I suppose. I wasnt there

at the time, but his two brothers

were ready to kill him.

So, they burned down their restaurant

for the insurance.

MITCH

I like the dog tracks in Florida.

OMAR

Thats fast action man.

MITCH

I always come away with something.

SALLY

This Lotto is the same thing.

AUGGY

What would you do if you won the Mega pot?

SALLY

Id buy myself a new house in

Sarasota, Florida.

OMAR

54


55/89

I cant afford to win.

MITCH

Oh yeah, the Ritas.

SALLY

I would walk on the beach everyday

at sunset.

MITCH

What about your family?

SALLY

Id take my kid and leave the

rest behind.

MITCH

Thats cold.

SALLY

I just feel better when their not around.

MITCHI know, nobody cares.

SALLY

I know your right. I should care more

about them. But the make it hard

to love them.

MITCH

I know what you mean.

My cousin Greco went out bar crawlinglast Friday. On the way home he

stopped to take a rest on a bus bench.

It was below freezing and he

passed out. Saturday morning the

cops tried to waken him, but he was

frozen to the bone.

55


56/89

SALLY

I remember that. Was he Puerto Rican

guy the newspapers called The Stiff?

MITCH

Yeah. At the wake he looked like

his father.

OMAR

Jesus, just like a frozen Margarita.

MITCH

You think Puerto Ricans are low lives?

OMAR

You said it not me. I prefer bottom

feeders.

MITCH

Thats discrimination.

OMAR

I love Puerto Rican women. What do

you think all the Ritas are?

MITCH

Theres nothing like watching a

Port Rican woman eat a mango.

SALLY

You dont have to explain.

OMAR

56


57/89

The men are another thing altogether.

Theyre all fucking drug dealers

or addicts.

SALLY

Its easy to find fault with them.

MITCH

When I was a kid I wanted to become

a doctor. My mom had high hopes.

AUGGY

You have to go to school to be a doctor.

MITCH

I like school, but I didnt want to

take tests.

AUGGY

Bull shit, you were always in trouble.

MITCH

Yeah, but you were the one that

flooded the school and I got blamed.

AUGGY

That wasnt my fault. I was just trying

to get a drink of water at the fountain.

The water was off, so I turned

it on under the fountain and gota drink. The class bell rang so

I went to my seat. I didnt know

it had a leek.

MITCH

57


58/89

An hour later the water was 2 inches

deep down the hallway into the

Deans office. Mr. Shavonie thought

it was me, so I was expelled from

his class.

AUGGY

Youre forgetting the time when you

almost electrocuted me?

(Talking to the group.)

We had to remove my power line

to get at a broken tree limb down.

(Talking to the group.)

MITCH

I was standing on the ladder cutting

The tree. He was holding the rest of it.

AUGGY

I thought you had it.

MITCH

He walks off, and the limb falls

against the fuse box on the wall.

One of my nads was fried.

It swelled up to a baseball.

AUGGY

Sorry man. I needed to use the head.

MITCH

Thats why I dont hang around with

him anymore.

SALLY asks TWO-STEP.

58


59/89

SALLY

What are you doing for Christmas?

TWO-STEP

We celebrate Hanukah. I havent

been invited home in years.

They think Im a hooker.

SALLY to the others.

SALLY

What about the rest of you guys?

AUGGY

I dont make long-range plans.

MITCH

If I live that long, well go to

my sisters house in the Batavia.

SALLY

Thats nice.

MITCH

Its the tomb of the unknown repairman.

SALLY

What do you mean?

MITCH

Everything is perfect.

SALLY

Whats wrong with that?

MITCH

59


60/89

Everywhere I sit, Im afraid Im

going to drop your food and make a mess.

SALLY

If I had a nice house, Id do the same.

MITCH

The other thing is that her husband

is a Honey Do Boy.

SALLY

Guys are supposed to help.

MITCH

He calls her Honey. Honey can I do that?

You know.

OMAR

Rita #3 didnt ask me to do a thing

around the house. But, she would call

me in the middle of a business meeting

and ask me where the frozen pizza

rolls where.Before I married the Ritas, I was always

forgetting my girl friends name.

SALLY

So, how do you keep track of the kids?

OMAR

Omar is my son with Rita #1.Babe and Little Rita are the twins

from Rita #2. Omar Jr., Beth and

Billy are with Rita #3.

Sam and June are with Rita #4.

Omar, Babe, Rita, Omar Jr. and June

are my children. The rest are split

between Jeff, Larry, Ramon,

60


61/89

Billy Sr. and Vern.

SALLY

There are too many men for the number

of kids.

OMAR

Ramon cant have kids. Rita #1 has

been married twice after me.

MITCH

What happened to Ramon?

OMAR

He was in a motorcycle crash and

smashed his manhood against the

gas tank.

MITCH

Ouch! Common mistake.

OMAR

Ramons a Moma Mucher. He hangs outat home and watched South Park all day.

He gets 20% disability from the head

injury he got in the Navy. Hes a real

sweetheart.

The phone rings. SALLY answers.

SALLY

Yes, hes standing right here,

hang on, MITCH its for you.

MITCH answers the phone.

MITCH

Hello.

61


62/89

SALLY picks up the newspaper and starts reading.

SALLY

The new Mayor, hes a Capricorn.

TWO-STEP

My last boy friend was a Capricorn.

SALLY

Where is he now?

TWO-STEP

He was too much of a cheapskate.

He didnt like to buy me things

because he said that I was too hard

on stuff or I would loose it.

I guess he was right in some ways,

but not always.

In the end, he lifted all my mothers

silverware.

SALLY

Those Capricorns are a lot of trouble.They always think theyre smarter

than the next guy. Meanwhile,

theyre doing stupid things.

Ive never met a good one.

OMAR

Whats the problem, MITCH?

MITCH

Theyre coming here to get me.

I need to hide.

OMAR

62


63/89

Sit down behind the counter and dont

get up till I tell you to.

MITCH walks around and sits under the counter.

MITCH

You dont think theyll look for me here?

OMAR

What kind of idiot would stay here?

SALLY

Whats youre birthday?

MITCH

May 1st, 1975.

SALLY

Youre on the cusp of Capricorn,

arent you MITCH?

TWO-STEP

Im an Aquarius.

SALLY

You are kind of spaced out most

of the time.

TWO-STEP

I guess thats true.

OMAR

What am I?

SALLY

63


64/89

Scorpio.

OMAR

Rita #2 said I was too negative.

SALLY

She is right. Every Scorpio I know

likes to pick a fight.

You cant help yourself.

OMAR

I just need lively conversation.

Whats the best match for me?

SALLY

If you want to fight, then find

another Scorpio or a Capricorn.

AUGGY

Im an Aries. What about me?

SALLY

Youre hardheaded and very aggressive.

OMAR

Thats a bunch of crap. Ask anybody.

SALLY

See, youre picking a fight.

OMAR

What about you?

SALLY

64


65/89


66/89

MITCH creeps up again from behind the counter.

MITCH

Thats one thing I believe in.

Ive seen the evil spirits.

I was in San Juan visiting my

best friend Roberto. We were smoking

weed in the back of his bakery.

From behind him appeared a spirit

woman with a baby. She was thin

and wasted. She asked for bread.

I said yes. The next day the same

woman came to the store caring a

baby and begged for a loaf of bread.

Roberto gave her what she needed.

He believed that he would have been

tormented forever if he had refused her.

SALLY

She must have been an Angel.

She was there to teach him about

compassion.

OMAR turns to MITCH.

OMAR

Down! She was a Spirit Witch.

Theres a She Devil Pakistani

that works the corner during the day.

She shows up about 8:30 every

morning for rush hour.

When Im leaving the store I see

her pushing a stroller.

Its where she keeps her stash.

All the stuff she shoplifts goesunder a life size baby doll

in the stroller.

AUGGY

66


67/89

Very clever those Pakistani Devils.

SALLY

What if there are devils waiting for

you when you die?

AUGGY

I hope theyre sex crazed little

nymphets.

MITCH

All those Playboy Bunnies and Hustler

center folds. Thats where they go,

straight to hell.

SALLY

You may have noticed that those

rags are not out in this store.

Ive put them under the counter

so the kids cant steal them.

AUGGY walks to the store window and peers out to the

street.

AUGGY

I think your friends are here MITCH.

OMAR walks over to the light switch and turns off the

lights.

OMAR

Everybody hit the floor and dontmove an inch.

67


68/89

Gunshots are fired into the store. The window breaks

and SALLY cries out.

SALLY

Yahweh help us.

The lights are out. Broken glass and bags of snacks

are on the floor.

OMAR

Is anybody hit?

SALLY

Im here, I think.

AUGGY

I cant move.

OMAR

The windows got a few holes in it.

MITCH?

MITCH

Im here.

OMAR

TWO-STEP? Are you OK?

AUGGY take a peek and see if theyre

gone.

Sally is she next to you?

SALLY

No.

68


69/89

AUGGY crawls to the front window and looks out from

between the signs taped to it.

AUGGY

I think theyre gone. I cant see

anybody.

OMAR

Im going to turn on the lights.

But dont get up until I say so.

OMAR crawls to the light switch and turns the lights

on.

OMAR

Can you see anybody now?

AUGGY

Its all clear.

SALLY

Wheres TWO-STEP?

She must have stepped out the back door during the

shooting.

MITCH

I think shes been hit. Look theres

a blood trail out the back.

SALLY

We need to call the Police.

OMAR

I dont know if I want to file a

Police report. Im going to call Poppy.

69


70/89

OMAR walks to the telephone and calls Poppy.

OMAR

Sorry, to call you so late but weve

had another shooting in the store.

What do you want me to do?

Poppy gives him instructions.

OMAR

Nobody in the store is hurt. Just a

few bullet holes in the window.

OMAR listens to Poppy.

OMAR

Ok. Ill call you in the morning.

OMAR hangs up the phone.

SALLY

What did he say?

OMAR

Well, he doesnt want me to call

this in to the police.

SALLY

But, TWO-STEP has been shot.

OMAR

We dont know that for sure.

MITCH

I see blood drops all the way back here.

70


71/89

SALLY

What if she dies? What then?

AUGGY walks to the door.

AUGGY

I dont want to talk to the cops.

I have some outstanding business

with them.

If they check me out, which they

surely will, Ill be in deep shit.

Im out of here.

AUGGY opens the door and looks around before walking

out to the street.

OMAR

What a piss ant punk.

OMAR walks to the back room and retrieves a broom and

starts sweeping up the mess.

SALLY

Whats wrong with you people?

OMAR

Look, Poppy doesnt want to loose

his state alcohol license. If you

have more than four shootings in a

two-year period, your license goes

up for review. And, they suspend it

during the review period, which

could take six months.

It also means you can loose yourinsurance. At least, you get put

in a high-risk pool and pay

through the b-hole.

SALLY

What about TWO-STEP?

71


72/89

OMAR

Thats the hazards.

Dont stand in front of a stray

bullet. I told everyone to hit

the floor, she should have.

SALLY

She couldnt bend her legs, to get down.

OMAR

You cant save every low life that

walks in the door.

SALLY goes to the coat rack on the back wall and walks

to the front door.

SALLY

If youre not going to do anything,

then I am.

OMAR

Where do you think youre going?

SALLY

Out there to find her. She could be

out there bleeding to death.

SALLY leaves the store disgusted with OMAR.

MITCH

What if she finds her dead?

OMAR

Lets not get ourselves all

worked up over that retard.

72


73/89

MITCH

I dont think my services are needed.

Ill be moving along.

OMAR

Oh no. You started this shit storm,

so youll stay until its finished.

MITCH

How can you blame me?

OMAR

It was your playmates that came to

by to visit you here. Youre staying

until I say you can leave or Ill let

Black Beauty persuade you.

MITCH

Im still here. What if shes dead?

OMAR

Youre going to explain everything

to the police.

MITCH

No man. Thats not cool.

OMAR

Why did you have to say anything

about the blood spots?

MITCH

Well

OMAR

Dont answer that.

73


74/89

MITCH

Shell go to the emergency room and

theyll patch her up.

OMAR

Or, shell bleed to death or freeze.

All we can do is wait here if she

comes back.

MITCH

Im sorry. You could have pushed me

out the door. You saved me; they would

have found me and popped a cap in my

head for sure.

OMAR

What makes you think that they

arent coming back?

MITCH

Turn out the lights.

OMAR

If they come back Im going to make

a deal. Your head for a new glass window.

MITCH

You wouldnt do that.

OMAR

Go over to the window and watch out

for them.

MITCH

I feel like a moving target at the

state fair.

74


75/89

OMAR

Stop whining. This is like

being back in the Nam.

OMAR continues sweeping the store.

MITCH

Here comes SALLY.

OMAR

Is she alone?

MITCH

Yes.

SALLY opens the door and enters the store.

MITCH

What happened? Did you find her?

SALLY

Yeah. Shes in the Operating Room

at Buffalo General. Theyll file apolice report.

MITCH

Man what a mess.

OMAR

Feeling a little guilt?

MITCH

Of course I do.

SALLY

The nurse I talked to said she wasnt

expected to survive the surgery.

75


76/89

OMAR

What happened?

SALLY

A bullet went through her chest.

We need to call the police.

OMAR

OK. Ill call them.

OMAR puts down his broom and walks to the wall phone.

OMAR

MITCH this is your fault. Im going to

have to banish you from the store.

MITCH

Can I go now?

OMAR

Stick around, youre going to haveto explain everything to the police

when they get here.

SALLY

Poor woman just couldnt get out

of the way.

OMAR is talking to the police.

OMAR

I need to report a shooting at

Poppys Corner Convenience Store.

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77/89

MITCH

Im screwed.

SALLY

Police Protection Program maybe?

OMAR hangs up the phone and turns to the counter.

OMAR

Theyre on the way. A homicide detective

will be here soon. They asked that

we shut the store and dont

touch anything.

SALLY

We should have called the police when it happened.

OMAR

Does anyone know where AUGGY can be found?

MITCH

Yeah. I know.

OMAR

Hes not going to be happy about

the attempted armed robbery charge

were going to file.

SALLY

Im more concerned about TWO-STEP.

OMAR

Whats her real name?

MITCH

I dont know.

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SALLY

I asked the nurse in the emergency

room. Its Mora Edelstein.

MITCH

Shes sure had a streak of bad luck.

SALLY

If she makes it through the surgery

well have to help her.

OMAR

The state helps her now. I need to

call Poppy.

OMAR returns to the wall phone.

MITCH

I didnt want this to happen.

God help me.

SALLY

Ive been praying pretty much since

the bullets started to fly.

MITCH

It didnt help TWO-STEP, sorry I

meant Mora.

SALLY

Theres always a plan to life.When its over thats it.

OMAR hangs up the phone and turns to the others.

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79/89

OMAR

Poppy isnt too pissed. Its happened

so many times in the past. He said,

it was just a matter of time, when

it would happen agian. Hes cool about it.

But, hes very sad about TWO-STEP.

I meant Mora. I told him she is

a Jewish woman.

MITCH

Isnt there a Jewish heaven?

OMAR

Theres got to be, if weve got one.

The Jehovah Witness people say

theres only room for 144,000 people.

MITCH

They should know, they are the only

ones going door to door counting

the saved souls.

SALLY

Thats not what theyre doing.

Theyre just trying to convert

people to their religion.

OMAR

I agree with MITCH on this one SALLY.

Theyre out there counting saved souls.

SALLY

Im not listening.

MITCH

What are we going to say to the Police

about when things happened tonight?

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80/89

OMAR

We cant fudge that, because theyll

know what time TWO-STEP, I mean Mora

checked into the hospital.

Plus, theres a time code on the VHS

tape. When can I call her

TWO-STEP again?

SALLY

Never. Its demeaning.

OMAR

I know, but she never complained.

SALLY

She has low self-esteem.

MITCH

What does that mean?

SALLY

You wouldnt know, because youdont have any ether.

OMAR

Lets not fight. We need to all

have the same story for the police.

So lets get it together.

Whats your story to the police?

SALLY

OK, we were standing in the store

trying to get AUGGY to give up the

gun when bullets started flying.

OMAR

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81/89

No. That sounds like AUGGY shot TWO-STEP.

Besides theres the surveillance

videotapes.

SALLY

No more TWO-STEP.

OMAR

But, she was TWO-STEP when it happened.

MITCH

Its my turn. Try this. We were drinking

a beer when a gang of drug dealers

came by and shot up the place.

OMAR

You cant say anything about the

beer because Poppy will get in

trouble with the State Alcohol Control.

Jesus, cant you people think.

SALLY

Did you ever consider that this place

could be a danger to the community?

OMAR

We just give people what they want,

the rest is up to them.

MITCH

OK, so I wont tell about the beer.Hows the rest of it?

OMAR

It doesnt matter, your going to

screw it up anyway.

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82/89

The stage goes to black out for a wardrobe and set

changes.

It is Christmas Eve. SALLY is at the cash register.

OMAR walks in carrying a broom and dust pan.

OMAR

Well here we are on Christmas Eve

and were all alone. Why dont you

call it quits and go home to your kid?

SALLY

I need the money, with Christmas

gifts and all.

OMAR

Ill cover for you. Go ahead.

SALLY

Ok. But, I owe you.

MITCH walks in the front door.

MITCH

Merry Christmas to all.

OMAR

What are you doing out?

MITCH

They ran me out of the house.

All the relatives are in from out

of town. What a pain in the ass.I was just smoking and eating cookies.

They said I was too noisy and the

place was filling up with smoke,

they took a vote and asked me to leave.

OMAR

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83/89

Its only for a few days.

MITCH

I was getting wacky anyways.

MITCH walks around the store looking for a snack.

SALLY

When is your probation up?

MITCH

Im doing well, no drugs. The NA group

is a trip. You wouldnt believe the

stories. And, guess who is going there?

SALLY

Everyone in the neighborhood?

MITCH

I cant use his name.

OMAR

Anonymous right?

MITCH

Ill give you a hint. He was in the

store the night of the shooting.

OMAR

AUGGY is in NA? I heard he wastaking anti-theft and domestic violence

classes.

SALLY

Whats your story for the NA group?

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84/89

MITCH

This is the way I tell it in the

group. It was a cold winter night

and a Puerto Rican drug gang was

after me. I took shelter in

Poppys Corner Store. They came to

the store for me and shot bullets

thru the store, hitting TWO-STEP

in the chest. It traveled straight

thru her lung. Blood squirted.

I had a moment of clarity.

And, I knew I had to stop. I had to

do something different. The police

arrested me. When I stood in front

of the judge, I said that I was sorry

that I had caused so much pain to

my family and to TWO-STEP.

He asked me who TWO-STEP was,

so I explained that she had a

stroke from rock. Now she can only

take two steps at a time. He said

its a miracle that shes still alive.

SALLY

I won.

OMAR

The Lotto?

SALLY

No. The bet. Remember that night

of the shooting, I bet you that Yahweh

would show you a miracle.

OMAR

The devil was on the loose that night.

SALLY

You have to give me three nights off.

You promised.

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85/89

OMAR

Youre dreaming.

MITCH

Some higher power was in this store.

I could feel it. Somehow I have to

make amends. Thats one of the

recovery steps.

The front door opens. TWO-STEP slowly enters the store.

SALLY

How are you?

TWO-STEP

Im fine. It only hurts when I breathe.

OMAR

Were worried about you.

TWO-STEP

The tube in my lung will come outnext week. Here look at how big it is.

TWO-STEP lifts up her blouse revealing her drainage

tube.

MITCH

Wow, that must hurt.

OMAR

Horrible. Whats that green stuff?

SALLY

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86/89

Its drainage, her lung is draining.

I know about these things I worked

as a nurses aide.

TWO-STEP covers herself.

TWO-STEP

Got a pack of Kent Ultra lights?

SALLY

You shouldnt be smoking. Youve only

got one lung.

TWO-STEP

I shouldnt be alive either.

OMAR

You didnt duck when I told you to.

TWO-STEP

I cant bend this leg. So, I couldnt.

SALLY

Its over and done with now.

So let it go.

TWO-STEP

Poppy said I could get free cigarettes

for a year because of what happened.

SALLY

Oh great.

OMAR

2 packs a day for 365 days. Thats over

$3,650 bucks.

MITCH

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87/89

Free cigarettes. Thats value plus, man.

SALLY

Well as long as we can keep our

priorities straight.

OMAR

Take the next three days off.

Yahweh or one of his friends was here

the night of the shooting.

Get out of here before I change my mind.

TWO-STEP

Sally would you please look at my

dressing before you go?

SALLY comes to TWO-STEP lifts her blouse and looks at

the dressing.

SALLY

Looks OK to me.

SALLY walks to the coat rack. She puts on her hat

scarf and coat.

SALLY

You guys are too much for me.

Im taking a pack of these

Grandmas Soft Cookies. Bill me.

Im leaving. Merry Christmas.

TWO-STEP

Merry Christmas.

MITCH

Cheers.

OMAR

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88/89

Dont leave without a hug. You never

know when one of us could be taken

to the Holy Land. Or die in our sleep.

MITCH

What if you were having a dream that

you were dying but couldnt wake up?

TWO-STEP

Thats when you need to take Jesus

into your heart real quick,

just in case its the end.

OMAR walks toward the audience onto a spotlight.

The main store lights go out. The Holiday lights stay lit.

OMAR

I think SALLY was right about some

things, at least the part about

it being a miracle that TWO-STEP

survived a stray bullet.

Mitch, well he has a tendency for

creating misfortune for everyone

around him.

Maybe a job in health insuranceindustry would do the trick.

AUGGY packs more mischief,

pound for pound. Its not only

because hes bipolar, although

Im sure that adds to it.

TWO-STEP has become what everyone

in the 60s was afraid would happen

to them if they didnt stop

smoking pot and taking LSD.

SALLY is right about me, Im a Scorpio

and its hell when I cant findsomeone to fight with.

Fortunately, this time of the year

there are lots of opportunities

with my family. It isnt that

I dont like my family or people

in general, its that I dont always

agree with them.

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89/89

But, every once in a while someone

like SALLY will surprise me.

I dont agree with most of her

religious dogma, but she has a gift,

an unexpected kindness that causes

a lot of strange feelings in me.

And I think its only natural to have

more than one miracle at Christmas.

FADE TO BLACK

Documents

Poppy's Corner, A Christmas Story by Steven Donnini