MPC NEWS MAGAZINE October 2016

Saturday Night at the Movies! The gods must be crazy because they wouldn’t let David show the planned September movie, so he’s going to try again this month, that is, on October 8th. Please see page 2 for information about it again.

Kangaroo Mother Care Child Health Foundation, October Mission Focus Clearly we can learn from the animals. The Kangaroo carries her baby skin-to-skin until it is able to cope with the environment, and an organization in Rwanda, sponsored

by CHF is pro-moting this for babies prema-turely born. They sent this drawing to illustrate. Kangaroo mother care is initiated in the hospital and allows the mother to go home early. They say, “It is a gentle, effective method that avoids the agitation routinely experienced in a busy ward with

preterm infants. It has been shown to be effective for ther-mal control, breastfeeding and bonding in all newborn in-fants, irrespective of setting, weight, gestational age, and clinical conditions.” This is just one of the many innovative, sustainable pro-jects CHF has all over the world. If you would like to help us save and improve babies lives, there are envelopes in the pews. Jo Sack

Next in October Living in the Presence: An Intro to Contemplative Prayer Practices Do you ever find yourself… struggling to hear the still, small voice of God? Opening Retreat – Saturday, October 1st 9:00am – 1:00pm Includes Light Lunch See more about this on page 2

Sunday Brew Theology and Coffee Begins Sunday October 1 at 9:30 AM

Led by Jocelyn McKeon and Darrell Wheeler Discussion subject: Acts

And you can buy some cards

Holidays Greetings Plain

Sale on Oct. 23 after worship To benefit the Child Health Foundation, the rescued women in Bangla-desh who do all the hand stitching...AND YOU!

Greeting Cards $3.50 each 3 for $10.00

Bags, Baskets and Bites Bingo A fundraiser for ACTC

will be held on October 22nd. Sounds like fun!

See details on page two.

Food For Thought Hunger and Homelessness in Local Schools Join the Mission Team for an informative hour, 9:30 to 10:30 AM on Sunday, October 16th in the Fellowship Room. Dr. Laurie-Taylor Mitchell, member of Food for Thought, League of Women Voters of Baltimore County, co-founder Advocates for Baltimore County Schools, and founder of the Loch Raven Network, will share information that she has recently collected about poverty, hunger and homelessness in our local schools. Cont’d on p.2

Page 2 Providence Press

Contemplative Prayer Practices... can lead us to greater awareness of God’s Presence in all things and at all times. They can assist us in deep-ly listening, fully encountering, and lovingly respond-ing to God. Lorie Conway will be leading an intro-duction and exploration of these life-giving practices. We will learn a little about the Christian Contempla-tive Tradition in our opening retreat and set the foun-dation for experimenting with different prayer prac-tices at our weekly gatherings. Each practice will in-vite us to quiet our minds and spirits, and open our hearts to the mystery of God’s Presence. Our eve-nings will follow a similar rhythm each week, includ-ing an introduction of the prayer form, practice of the prayer, reflection, and sharing. Please join us! Weekly Gatherings - Wednesdays 10/5, 10/12, 10/19, 10/26, 11/2, 11/9 7:00pm Lorie Conway

With permission

ACTC Fundraiser in October A fundraiser for the Assistance Center of Towson Churches (ACTC) will be held at First Lutheran

Church Towson, 40 East Burke Ave-nue, which is called Bags, Baskets and Bites Bingo! The event will be held Saturday, October 22nd at 7 p.m., with doors opening at 6 p.m. For $25, guests will have the chance to play 20 bingo games to win beautiful bags, baskets or bowls filled with good things. There

will also be additional raffle items, a 50-50 raffle, as well as door prizes, with food and drink for sale. We hope that you will enjoy a fun evening of fellowship with your friends, while raising money to help reduce hunger in our community. Everyone is encouraged to help by contributing a filled basket or bag with a theme. See suggestions below. To buy tickets ($25), send or bring cash or check to 120 W. Pennsylvania Avenue, Towson, MD 21204 designated 4B Fun. If available, tickets will be $30 at the door. Leslie Erickson Themed Basket Ideas for Bingo Games Movie night at home Night out (restaurant gift card and event tickets) Dinner in Towson Halloween Decor Harvest Basket Thanksgiving Basket Christmas Basket

Golf Fitness Doggie Gourmet foods, or cheese and gift cards Artists basket Wine and gourmet Orioles or Ravens

Food For Thought continued from page 1 In 2013, in Baltimore County over 33,000 children struggled with food insecurity, representing 18.7% of children in the county and an increase from 31,190 in 2012. This is the second highest level in the state and slightly more than Baltimore City. In 2014-2015, there were 2,742 identified home-less children attending BCPS schools. Homeless chil-dren are at high risk of hunger and food insecurity, especially on weekends, school breaks and during the summer. Figures like these inspired Laurie and a group of local churches to create, with the help of ACTC, a program to provide weekend food for stu-dents called Food For Thought. Leslie Erickson

Saturday Night at the Movies! October 8 7:00 PM The Gods Must Be Crazy is about a Kalahari bushman

who recognizes that a gift from the gods (a coke bottle thrown out of an airplane) has disrupted the social fabric of his society. So he goes on a journey to the edge of the world to return the gift to the gods. This movie is a litmus test of the current state of “civilized” humankind. Yet in this hilarious movie we see in this simple man the simple pleasures that we all seek, a reminder

of what we were taught to forget, a reminder of how little real life exists in modern life, and how much is missing from the structures that exist in that life. We will have a conversation about the movie afterwards. David Rebstock

Providence Press Published for

the members and friends of Maryland Presbyterian Church,

1105 Providence Road, Towson, Maryland 21286.

(410) 825-0719 Editors: Jo Sack, Rick Dezes

Production and distribution Dale Salah, Alma Smith, Other Contributors to this Issue: Leslie Erickson, Carol Mason, Mary Jo Zimbro, David Rebstock,

Page 3 Providence Press

Laugh of the Month More Droll

1.Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines? 2. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs? 3. Does the Little Mermaid wear an Algebra? 4. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? 5. How is it possible to have a civil war? 6. Why do shops have signs, “guide dogs only” if the dogs can’t read and their owners are blind? 7. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? 8. Whose cruel idea was it for the word lisp to have “s” in it? 9. Why are hemorrhoids called that instead of assteroids? 10. If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times, does he become disoriented? 11. Can an atheist get insurance against acts of God?

An Attempt at Easier Latin Humpus Dumpus sativit on fensus. Humpus Dumpus hadavit accidentus. Allum Rexus equinus Et allum Rexus manus Non putavit Humpus Dumpus Constickatum againus. Jo Sack

Editorial Comment Quack Quack I’m on a Quest to find the Q-words. Ah, the Quetzal, it’s a Q-bird. Found a country, It’s Qatar. Quebec, a city, not as far. Quote from the Bible to begin. Quartet sings a Quaker hymn. Period of Quiet before prayer, Quality time with everyone there. Quaker oats in the early morn. Quiche for lunch, always warm. Dinner, Quail, maybe a roast. Some good Quince jam on toast. A Quilt in a Quonset hut at night. A Queen would have Qualms, a fright. Seniors’ Quarters: a dorm in a Quad. A Queen would find this all Quite odd. Quincy ate a Quesadilla at Qdoba. Quenched his thirst Quickly with a soda. Took home chips with a Queso dip. Quinetta shared with a witty Quip. A Quell in Quito Quashed the foe. Questions in Latin, Quid, Quod, Quo? If you Quarrel, Quickly reconcile, Then go the Quintessential mile. Now it’s time for a Quiz for you. What did Quaint Don Quixote do? What caused a Quake inside the Quarry? Did the long Queue cause a Query? Shall I Quit this chatter, it’s Quite clear? I think I reached the Quota. Oh so Queer. Perhaps I Qualify for the Quack Award! Jo Sack

See page 7 for help with last month’s Ed Comment

PJ Widerman and Vicki Sjoander will be in church on October 9th before they move to Florida. A for-

mal farewell is planned. Please come and say goodbye.

Their new address is in the directory.

Providence Press Page 4

Mission Update Below you will see the CWS kits being deliv-ered, that is, 155 school and 55 hygiene, kits to the warehouse in New Windsor. Some of MPC’s generous folks brought the supplies and others put $412 in the pew envelopes. There was $250 left over from last year. That makes a total of $661 plus a budgeted amount of $350. $2 of this amount was donated for each kit to CWS to help with shipping and handling and the other good works of CWS. This exceeds the 150 kits gathered in 2015. Thank you!

Kits Delivered

The Church World Service kits, both school and hygiene were delivered to the warehouse in New

Windsor by (left to right) Mere-dith Memmer, Rosie Wilmoth (Dot’s sister), Dot Attwell and Rosemary Plummer. In the pram is Everett Memmer. Thanks to Dot and Rosemary for organizing a very effective collection of the kits and we thank all those who generously gave supplies and funds, and also helped with as-

sembling. There was witness of much enthusiasm in July and August.

Four of us from MPC volunteered to work on September 17 for the Habitat for Humanity McCabe Avenue Project, including Mary Murray, Bill Sitterley, Alan Bricker, and myself. We were joined by two members from Roland Park Presbyterian Church and a rather large contingent from MetLife Insurance Company, who provided lunch for everyone. We were divided into two groups of ten: one group installed framing and insulation in a gutted house; and the second group worked on cleaning and painting a house that was nearing completion. In fact, the house’s prospective owner was pre-sent contributing her sweat equity. During lunch the president of the community association gave us an update on all of the progress occurring in the neighborhood. All in all it was a very reward-ing day of work, fun, learning and making new friends. Mary Jo Zimbro

Jon (Century Engineering), Chenita, Mary (Roland Park Pres), Mary Jo, Alan, Bill and Mary (MPCers)

McCabe Avenue Mission Project

Little children have learned that: When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair. If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person. Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. You can't trust dogs to watch your food. Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair. Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time. You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.

It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you

the questions.

Page 5 Providence Press

What in God’s Name By Simon Rich Imagine if you will, a great corporation, the exist-

ence of which relies solely on the manufacturing of xenon gas. In fact, Earth was created for that end. The CEO loves Nascar, golf, and drinking beer from a glass. Oh, and read-ing what humans are blog-ging about him. And the Yankees. I guess it’s only fair to mention that the corpora-tion is Heaven, Inc., and the CEO is God, in Simon

Rich’s novel, What in God’s Name. God actually puts the day to day business of running the world in the hands of his angels in their many departments (they have many benefits including great health care and vacations, and only have to work 40 years be-fore they can retire), and their superiors, the archan-gels, (who get better perks). God is a let alone kind of guy and that has given way to a rather lackadaisical attitude. Sometimes he wonders if the humans really need him or if it’s the other way around. He doesn’t want to make them suffer, he just wants them to like him. Earth frus-trates him. For example, the Miracles department, in which Craig and Eliza work, manufactures coinci-dences. So, everything happens for a reason. It fol-lows then that religions are the “fault” of angels. Anyway, Eliza, in charge of sending prayers to God based on an urgency scale she invented, realiz-es God has been ignoring them. After she com-plains, God realizes that he’s tired and has sent a memo that he will destroy earth and open up a new Asian-fusion restaurant in Heaven. Eliza insists he has more to do on earth and strikes a deal with him. Craig and she will have to get the two most socially awkward couple on earth to fall in love. If they can do that they will rescue earth from Armageddon. And so Craig and Eliza, with the help of Vince, an archangel, procede to program several codes in an attempt to bring the two together. It’s more difficult than they imagine. And they realize that one little coincidence they make on earth, causes something else to occur which makes for all sorts of judgment calls on their part. These maneuvering sequences are ingeniously concocted and hilarious…especially when Indian food is concerned.

Simon Rich’s book is a quick fun read. Needless to say it’s a different take on the Divine and the Hereaf-ter, and it’s a spoof on basic old time theology. Hey, haven’t we all personalized God in some way, identify-ing him or her in human form, having the same mood swings that we do? Or is that just me and the influence of Michaelangelo and Charleton Heston. Rich is pok-ing fun at organized religion, but at the same time many of the Bible’s stories are camouflaged through-out and will probably bring about a smirk or two. Irre-verant? Sacreligious? I didn’t find it to be. Theologi-cal? No way. A different spin on what we believe? Most definitely. Hey, God created us in his own image, right? So why shouldn’t he like to play golf and drink beer. Rick Dezes

Book Review

Festivals Summer music festivals have people traveling to various parts of the country to see

their favorite bands and spend a weekend in the sun, ears attuned to beating drums and soothing vocals. It is no secret these open-air festivals generate a lot of waste, often left behind by festival-goers. In 2015, the Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival, with the help of Clean

Vibes, diverted nearly 200 tons of material (67 per-cent) from the landfill through reuse, recycling and composting initiatives. The Refill Revolution pro-gram, with the mantra of “Drink, Refill, Repeat,” encourages festival-goers, staff and musicians to re-place single use cups and plastic water bottles with reusable options. Placing water refill stations through-out the festival, event organizers have made it easier than ever to fill up, hydrate and reduce “waste.” Each year, Bonnaroo seeks to reduce food waste by recover-ing extra food from catering tents on festival grounds. This food is then donated to needy families. In 2015, a record recovery of 29,000 pounds of food benefited the food bank recipients in Grundy County. Planet Roo, a completely eco-friendly area of the festival, offers workshops on making sustainable choices and affecting change, and features a performance stage powered by solar panels. From Baltimore County’s The ReSource

ECO-Info

Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber,

not the toy.

Page 6 Providence Press

Your Session in August 2016 Clerk’s Report: * Marion Wilson’s request to renew her membership here by Letter of Transfer was approved. Committee Reports:: * Since the Nominating and Personnel Committee has been separated into two committees, a new description of duties for the Manual of Operations is required. The Nominating Committee job description has been ap-proved.

Pastoral Considerations and Transition Report: * A Stewardship Drive is planned for October 16 through November 20, when pledges will be dedicated in the service. * The COM liaison to the PNC will be Rev. Jeanne Gay. * The first meeting will be September 20. * Marion Wilson will be welcomed back to the congregation on September 18th. New Business: A Memorial Service for Ann Layton will be September 10th. at 11:30. Carol Mason

Are you sure you want to keep her?

Sack

Providence Press Page 7

Finance and Administration Summary August 2016

Total income in August was $16,651, compared to expenses of $14,209. As a result, MPC experienced its first monthly gain of the year. Net income of $2,443 reduced our Operating Funds Available deficit to ($4,288), still negative, but better! Year-to-date total income lags Budget by $16,338. Congregational support is off $10,748, or 10% of budget, which was set as equal to 2015, so this really is a shortfall. Rental income is $5,699 behind budget but should improve to about half that by year-end (per July Summary). Expenses are $3,015, or 2% over budget year-to-date, due primarily to costs of the recently completed audit, as well as some earlier than expected property expenses. MPC should experience good financial results during the last four months of the year, and as usual, that will depend mostly on the generosity of the congregation! YTD 8/31/16 Income and Expense, Balance Sheet and Fund Highligh Statements Available on Request Operating Income: $ 113,595 Operating Expenses: $ 142,017 Operating Funds Available: $ (4,288)* Reconciled PNC Balance: $ 49,950 *Operating Funds Available (OFA) is our reconciled bank balance, minus both payroll liabilities and the sum of restricted fund balances. MPC started 2016 with operating funds available, carried over from 2015, of $19,640. **This balance reflects an end-of-year update to actual market value on December 31, 2015, less Endowment withdrawals as the year progresses. Treasurer’s Recommendations to Session: Review income trends and expense management

Limit uses of Restricted Funds Incorporate financial concerns into Pastoral search as possible

J. Wright Witcher

How well did you do with last month’s “Clip Art?” Once upon a time there was a woman named Rosemary who lived in Baltimore, her quarters on the Chesapeake. She graduated from Loch Raven High School and the US naval Academy, and is now a pilot for Delta Airlines. On Sunday she goes to the fo-rums at MPC. She believes that God watches over her. Last night her friend Carl asked her to go with him to see Star Wars. She said OK if after they could have pumpkin muffins at Panera. She is flying soon for Turkey, stopping first in Hamburg. This only if she recov-ers from a throat infection causing horseness and difficulty swallowing. The doc-tor gave her some penicillin and told her to rest and drink lots of water. She preferred Mountain Dew. While recovering, Rose watched Base ball on TV. Her mother wanted her to go to Target with her to get some toothpaste and a new jacket. Then they had an ice-cream cone.

Restricted Fund Balances: Mission: $ 916 General: $ 8,821 Memorials: $ 44,248 Total Endowment: $ 376,445**

Thursday Choir rehearsal 7:30 PM Sunday Worship 11:00 AM Communion First Sunday of each month

October 2016 Sat 1 Contemplative Prayer Practices Retreat See p. 1&2 Sun 2 Coffee and Theology 9:30 AM; Worship 11:00 AM Wed 5 Contemplative Prayer 7:00 PM Sat 8 Saturday Night Movie 7:00 PM See p. 2 Sun 9 Worship 11:00 AM Mon 10 Finance 6:30 PM Tue 11 Session 6:30 PM Wed 12 Contemplative Prayer 7:00 PM Sun 16 Coffee and Theology 9:30 AM Worship 11:00 AM; Faith Journey Group 4:00 PM Wed 19 Contemplative Prayer 7:00 PM Sun 23 Worship 11:00 AM Tue 25 Mission Action Group 6:30 PM Wed 26 Contemplative Prayer 7:00 PM Sun 30 Worship 11:00 AM Mon 31 Halloween

Visit our website at www.mpchurch.org Facebook and Twitter

Mission: To be a welcoming, progressive faith community, nurturing inquisitive Christians for life and service in the twenty-first century.

Church Staff Rev. Bill Sitterley, Interim Minister Greg Metzler, Director of Music Dale Salah, Administrative Director Anne E. Culbertson, Choir Section Leader Kathy Ramirez, Custodian

MPC News Magazine Maryland Presbyterian Church 1105 Providence Road Towson, Maryland 21286 mpc@mpc.org

September Activities

MPC received new members, Purity Njagi and Marion Wilson on September 18th.

Far Left: Mary Jo Zimbro and Mary Murray prepare to work in the McCabe Ave Habitat for Humanity house. Left: Bill Sitterley and Alan Bricker do the same. See page 4