Marriage, Home, and Family

Godly Wisdom in Parenting

I. Wise and Godly Parents Embrace the Right Goal

A. This means that there is a distinct rejection of human and worldly wisdom concerning their children

B. When a child’s happiness becomes the supreme objective, that is a worldly goal.

C. When your own sense of contentment as a “good parent” becomes the supreme objective, that is a worldly goal.

1. Heb 12:9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? Heb 12:10 For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness.

When the by-product becomes the goal, homes tend to operate like this:

• Crisis management discipline• Indulgence and permissiveness• Children who are self-centered, self-indulgent,

undisciplined, and spiritually aimless• A total absence of any real understanding of

who God is, or what He is like

Godly & Wise Homes operate upon a core set of principles

• Each member of the family exists for the glory of God.

• Therefore, no one member of the family is the center of the universe—because God is the center of the universe

• The purpose of the home is to train servants—this includes—but is not limited to, parents who are servants of God

• Biblical discipline, instruction, and wisdom produce the things we are aware we want: happiness, contentment, and a sense of worth

II. Wise and Godly Parents Have Biblically Realistic Expectations

A. Proverbs are proverbs—not promisesB. There is NEVER, in any place in the Bible, the

presentation of a FORMULA by which one human being can control the soul and spirit of another human being. Not pastors. Not bosses. Not husbands. Not fathers.

C. If one person could do that, then Deuteronomy 21.18-21, provides for the execution of the wrong person

D. And Ezekiel’s sermon (18.1-28) is wrong

E. The only perfect Father had a son who rebelled against Him, slandered Him, doubted Him, and sided with the devil against Him.

F. And the only perfect Son had flawed parents.G. As parents, we need to understand and

submit to the instructions God gives, and then parent in such a way that we can answer to Him for the “style” of parent that we were. We are not going to answer to God for the type of person our child became

III. Wise and Godly Parents Discipline and Instruct, with the right goal in focus

A. It is our job in the home to be the teacher, the police, the judge and the jury.

B. To refuse those tasks because they breed unpopularity is to fail in our responsibility before God.

C. But the goal is not simply to produce well behaved children who do well in school so they can get good jobs

D. The ultimate goal of discipline and instruction is conversion

1. Proverbs 1.72. Solomon is obviously connecting wisdom and

instruction to conversion (In the OT, “fear of the Lord” is synonymous with “believing in Jesus”)

E. Neither Solomon—or the remainder of the OT—ever taught that rigid external obedience produced conversion

1. Proverbs 4.23 (heart)2. Deuteronomy 6.4-9 (heart)