CY Family Mag #190

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Listen to the Country Yossi Radio Show, Tuesday Evenings, 7 - 8PM on WSNR 620 AMFor Magazine or Radio Advertising Call: (718) 851-2010

MARCH 2014 s"ga, ’c rst

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Hi Everybody,

Our annual Purim issue is al-

ways the talk of the town, and this

year will be no exception. Our

staff just got through watching a

private screening of Megillas

Lester and our jaws are still on

the floor! From the riveting story-

line, state-of-the-art, super-fluid

animation and lush, eye-pleasing

backgrounds thru the great, origi-

nal songs and often hilarious

script, Megillas Lester has raised

the bar on Jewish video produc-

tion to levels rivaling Disney and

Pixar! Read the inside story about

the super talented team that pro-

duced this magnificent master-

piece!

We also spotlight the Big

Chazaq Event II, scheduled for

Sunday night March 30 at Forest

Hills High School, featuring great

music, entertainment and world

renowned lecturers like Charlie

Harary, R’ Zechariah Waller-

stein and R’ Paysach Krohn! We

will whisk you behind the scenes

of this exciting event and provide

insight into this most amazing

and unforgettable happening!

Don’t miss it!

We are also happy and proud

to announce the imminent release

of our all new Kivi & Tuki CD

Vol. 6! Called “Count Your

Blessings,” this long-awaited al-

bum (12 years in the making) fea-

tures over an hour of original ma-

terial and 13 entertaining and ed-

ucational new songs that will

have kids of all ages singing and

dancing when they’re not plotzing

with laughter at Tuki’s Mishagos!

Songs such as “Fargin”,

“Lamed Tes Milachos” and “100

Brachos a Day,” along with the

ever popular Seder songs “Who

Knows One” and “One Kid, One

Kid” will teach the kinderlach

valuable Torah lessons while si-

multaneously instilling in them a

joyful sense of wonder. Not only

are they loads of fun - they’re

powerful educational tools as

well! So pick up a copy and put

some in your Shalach Monos!

Of course, our National Yen-

ta Purim Parody will have you

staggering around the house be-

fore you even had your first

drink!

Wishing you all ah freilichin

Purim!

See ya on the radio.

Your friend,

Country Yossi

Message From the Publisher

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Interior Layout: H. Walfish

COPYRIGHT © 2014 - Country Yossi Family Magazine, Inc. All rights reserved. Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for unsolicited submissions. Unsolicitedmanuscripts, photographs, and other submitted materials must be accompanied by a stamped self-addressed envelope. We reserve the right to print all letters inpart or in full unless specifically requested otherwise. No articles, photographs, artwork or other material in this magazine may be reproduced in any manner what-soever, without prior written permission of the publisher. Country Yossi Family Magazine will not be responsible for typographical errors or advertisers’ claims.

website: www.countryyossi.com

COUNTRY YOSSI FAMILY MAGAZINE • 1310 48th Street, Suite 304 • Brooklyn, New York 11219

Telephone: (718) 851-2010 • Email Address: [email protected]

Cover Design: R.A. Stone

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LET’S SHMOOZE ...................................................................................................................................................................................23

COVER STORY

• Megillas Lester: An Upside Down, Inside Out Megilla Adventure, by Chaya Sara Schlussel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32

SPOTLIGHT

• Major Excitement Over the Second Annual “Big Chazaq Event” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

• Easy Flow: Little One’s Serenity, Mother’s Best Remedy, by Chaya Sara Schlussel. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76

• Kivi and Tuki: Count Your Blessings, by Chaya Sara Schlussel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 120

OPINION

• A Sad, Sad World, by Rabbi Berel Wein . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46

INSPIRATION.........................................................................................................................................................................................49

SOUND OFF

• What Were We Thinking? By Ari Lapin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56

TORAH

• The Joy of Adar, by Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62

REAL LIFE

• Where’s Bubby? By Avraham Y. Yosefson . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 68

• My Greek Experience, by Meir Sommers . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 88

TIMELINE ................................................................................................................................................................................................70

NATIONAL YENTA PURIM PARODY ............................................................................................................................................72

HEALTH AND ADVICE

• Dr. D. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 80

• Dear Bubby. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 82

• How Sweet It Isn’t, by Rochelle Elbogen, cspn, cft . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83

• Who’s Looking for a Social Butterfly? by Rifka Schonfeld, Director of S.O.S. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 84

ISRAEL

• Purim in a Cattle Car, by Dov Shurin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 100

CONTROVERSY

• YWN Coffee Room: List the Houses that Don’t Shovel Here . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104

JEWISH BOOKS

• Top 10 in Jewish Books . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 109

• Book Excerpt: The Mexico File, by Chaim Greenbaum . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 110

PEOPLE

• Rav Meir Schuster, zt’l: The Man at the Wall, by Bracha Goetz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 112

JEWISH MUSIC

• CY Songbook: Under the Chupa . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 125

• Top 3 in Jewish Music . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 127

• The “Z” Report, by Yossi Zweig . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 130

HUMOR

• Hilchos Purim, by Chaptzem. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 132

• Can’t You Just Plotz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 135

• Purim Mania, by Kayla Kuchleffel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 137

AROUND TOWN

• Statcare: Primary and Urgent Care . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 139

March 2014 / s"ga, ’c rst Table of Contents Volume 26 Number 8

“This Purim, I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy – CY

“New York’s Premier Jewish Magazine” s"xcISSUE190

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BAD BIRD BEHAVIOR

Dear Country Yossi,Dovid received a parrot for

his Bar Mitzvah. This parrot had areally bad attitude and worse vo-cabulary. Dovid tried to teach himmanners, but the bird just got rud-er and cruder. Desperate,Dovid put him in thefreezer to cool off. Heheard squawking, thenquiet. Frightened, Dovidquickly opened the freezer.

The parrot calmlywalked out and said: “I’msorry I offended you, RebDovid. I shall go to shul, pray,and modify my behavior.” Be-fore Dovid could ask about thisastounding change, the parrotcontinued: “Sir... may I ask whatthe Empire chicken did?”

L.K.Boro Park

WATCH THISDear Country Yossi,

I was walking with my 9-year-old when we passed by astore. The store had a sign thatread, “Watch batteries installed$5.” My son asked, “Why wouldsomeone pay to watch batteriesbeing installed?”

Y.N.Williamsburg

Dear Y.N.,Good question!

CY

NOTHING IN COMMONDear Country Yossi,

I was walking across a bridgeone day and I saw a man standingon the edge, about to jump off. So

Litvish Yerushalmi Mussarnik orare you a Litvish YerushalmiBrisker?”

He said, “A Litvish Yerushal-mi Mussarnik!”

I said, “Me too! Are you aLitvish Yerushalmi MussarnikSlobodkaniker or a LitvishYerushalmi Mussarnik Kelmer?”

He said, “Litvish YerushalmiMussarnik Slobodkaniker!”

I said, “Apikoires!” andpushed him off the bridge.

J.B.Yerushalayim

GREAT LOGICDear Country Yossi,

Everyone concentrateson the problems we’re hav-ing in our country lately:Illegal immigration, hurri-cane recovery, alligatorsattacking people inFlorida. Not me. I con-centrate on solutions for

the problems - it’s a win-win sit-uation.

• Dig a moat the length of theMexican border.

• Send the dirt to New Orleansto raise the level of the levees.

• Put the Florida alligators inthe moat along the Mexicanborder.Any other problems you

would like for me to solve today?Think about this:1. Cows2. The Constitution3. The Ten Commandments

COWS:

Is it just me, or does anyoneelse find it amazing that duringthe Mad Cow epidemic our gov-ernment could track a single cow,born in Canada almost three years

I ran over and said “Stop! Don’tdo it!”

“Why shouldn’t I?” he asked.I replied, “Well, there’s so

much to live for!”“Like what?”

he asked.

I said, “Well... areyou Jewish or a Goy?”

“Jewish,” he replied.I said, “Me too! Are you Or-

thodox or Reform?”He answered, “Orthodox.”I said, “Me too! Are you

Charedi or Modern?”He said, “Charedi.” I said,

“Me too! Are you Litvish or Chas-sidish?”

He answered, “Litvish.”I said, “Wow! Me too! Are

you a Litvish Yerushalmi orLitvish B’nai-Braker?”

He said, “A Litvish Yerushal-mi!”

I said, “Me too! Are you a



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ago, right to the stall where she slept inthe state of Washington? And, theytracked her calves to their stalls. Butthey are unable to locate 11 million il-legal aliens wandering around ourcountry. Maybe we should give each ofthem a cow.THE CONSTITUTION:

They keep talking about drafting aConstitution for Iraq.

Why don’t we just give themours?

It was written by a lot of reallysmart guys, it has worked for over 200years, and we’re not using it anymore.THE 10 COMMANDMENTS:

The real reason that we can’t havethe Ten Commandments posted in acourthouse or government building isthis - you cannot post ‘Thou Shalt NotSteal,’ ‘Thou Shalt Not Commit Adul-tery’ and ‘Thou Shall Not Lie’ in abuilding full of lawyers, judges andpoliticians. It creates a hostile workenvironment.

Received via email

STRESS MANAGEMENT

FOR WOMEN

Dear Country Yossi,A young lady confidently walked

around the room while explainingstress management to an audience witha raised glass of water. Everyone knewshe was going to ask the ultimate ques-tion, ‘half empty or half full?’ Shefooled them all. “How heavy is thisglass of water?” she inquired with asmile. Answers called out ranged from8oz. to 20oz.

She replied, “The absolute weightdoesn’t matter. It depends on how longI hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’snot a problem. If I hold it for an hour,I’ll have an ache in my right arm. If Ihold it for a day, you’ll have to call anambulance. In each case it’s the sameweight, but the longer I hold it, theheavier it becomes.” She continued,“And that’s the way it is with stress. Ifwe carry our burdens all the time,sooner or later, as the burden becomesincreasingly heavy, we won’t be ableto carry on. As with the glass of water,you have to put it down for a while andrest before holding it again. Whenwe’re refreshed, we can carry on withthe burden - holding stress longer and



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better each time practiced. So, as earlyin the evening as you can, put all yourburdens down. Don’t carry themthrough the evening and into the night.Pick them back up tomorrow.”

1. Accept the fact that some daysyou’re the pigeon, and some daysyou’re the statue!

2. Always keep your words softand sweet, just in case you have to eatthem.

3. Drive carefully. It’s not onlycars that can be recalled by their Mak-er.

4. If you lend someone $20 andnever see that person again, it wasprobably worth it.

5. It may be that your sole purposein life is simply to serve as a warningto others.

6. Never buy a car you can’t push.7. Never put both feet in your

mouth at the same time, because thenyou won’t have a leg to stand on.

8. Since it’s the early worm thatgets eaten by the bird, sleep late. Thesecond mouse gets the cheese.

9. Birthdays are good for you. Themore you have, the longer you live.

10. We could learn a lot fromcrayons. Some are sharp, some arepretty and some are dull. Some haveweird names and all are different col-ors, but they all have to live in thesame box.

11. A truly happy person is onewho can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

12. Live every moment like it’sthe last moment of your life.

13. Know that someone hasthought about you today.

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY14. Save the earth! It’s the only

planet with chocolate!T.N.

FlatbushDear T.N.,

It’s also the only planet withCholent!

CY

HELP HIM CLIMBDear Country Yossi,

The following is a true life story.Gal is 39 and has lived in the Keren OrAssisted Living Dormitory since theage of ten years old. Gal was born as aperfectly healthy child, but a malig-nant tumor altered the course of his life



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forever. As a child of only 6, the tumorwas found and surgically removed, butdespite the procedure Gal was injuredirrevocably.

His sight was damaged and he be-came blind.

His cognitive and intellectual de-velopment was also damaged.

In seeking ways to provide himwith the optimal learning environment,Gal moved into Keren Or’s AssistedLiving Dormitory. Gal’s parents sup-port and assist fully and devotedly,showing great love and care to thisvery day. It should be noted that Gal’smedical condition does not remainstatic. Over the years his status hasworsened, both at the cognitive andmotor function levels. For the past fewmonths Gal is no longer able to sup-port his own body in a stable manner,and mobility now requires full andconstant use of a wheelchair.

This worsening of status led to anadditional outcome of detrimental ef-fect for Gal: because of access difficul-ties in the community where he wasliving, we were forced to transfer himto the hostel framework.

Gal had lived in the apartmentwithin the community for severalyears, sharing it with four morefriends, alongside the assistance staff.

The move into the hostel was a vi-tal necessity because the stairs that ledto the previous apartment were nolonger negotiable for a wheelchair-bound individual.

Recently, we happily learned of asimple and viable solution to the prob-lem of the stairs, with the installationof a “stairlift;” a device on which thewheelchair is fitted and allows movingup and down the stairs.

The stairlift would mean that Galcould return to his regular apartmentand fully engage in his usual routine.

This is our hope and wish: thatGal can return immediately to theapartment. But we need assistancewith funding for the stairlift’s pur-chase. We are therefore requestingyour help, and we thank you in ad-vance for your caring efforts.

I am writing this letter to you inthe hope of helping this 39-year-oldman whom my nephew in Israelworked with in Keren Or of Jerusalem,a wonderful facility for the blind and



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disabled. Gal has grown accustomed tobeing with people who cared for him,helped him, nurtured him, and madehim feel like family.

He was able to walk upstairs inthe facility to the room in Keren Orthat had been his home, his place ofresidence. But he developed a severeparalysis along with other disabilities,which made him unable to access thesteps and people had to carry him upand down the stairs in order to gain ac-cess to his room. As time went on, itbecame harder and harder to carry Galupstairs and sadly, as they could nolonger help him, he had to be trans-ferred away from “his home” and intoa place where no one is familiar tohim, where he cannot understand whatis happening to him, putting him into asad, lonely and desperate situation.

We would like to help Gal getback home, and the only way he willbe able to accomplish this is by havinga stairclimber installed into the facilityin which he can be easily taken up-stairs.

This is expensive for Gal’s family,and we are trying to help him as muchas we can. Please help us to help Galget back to his home, his friends, hisfamiliar place, the happy life and theonly life he has known.

Any amount is appreciated. Youcan make checks out to: Young Israelof West Hempstead - Rabbi’s Fund.Please mail to: Joyce Simantov, 836Myrna Drive, West Hempstead, NY,11552.

Joyce SimantovDear Joyce,

Thank you for bringing this to ourattention.

Tizku L’mitzvos!CY

WHY I DON’T GET

MY JM FOR FREEDear Country Yossi,

I love good Jewish music.Whether it’s Shwekey, 8th Day or myfavorite singer Lipa Schmeltzer, itmatters not who, when a new cd comesout I’m on it.

Now CDs cost money. Thirteendollars is not a whole terrible lot ofmoney. True. But still, when you mul-tiply that by all the new CDs comingout, well, that money really does add



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up.I’m very far from being well off

financially. Like everybody else in to-day’s world, I’ve got a lot of bills topay, and I’m trying to make ends meet.Of course I’m actually extremely luckyto even have a job. As I know all toowell, way too many people in today’stough economy are stuck jobless.

All that being said, you wouldthink that when my good, generousfriend offers to do me the kindness ofloading up my ipod with all of Jewishmusic’s latest and greatest, for free, I’d

be more than happy to oblige.I mean hey, it’s free! What could

be better than good free music? Right?Wrong.This free music that I’m enjoying

so intensely now, is actually, believe itor not, coming to me at an expense.

The expense of someone else outthere.

This guy, we’ll call him Mr.Singer, has been sweating away forover 2 and a half years now in a tiny,hot, cramped studio. He’s been push-ing himself to his limits over and over

again for hours, day in and day out.Why does he do all this?He’s got a family. He’s got wed-

dings to attend and events and dinnersto sing at. So why does he work sohard and spend so much time and en-ergy shvitzing away in the studio fordays on end?

In order to answer this, I want youto think about what the frum worldwould look like if there was, Heavenforbid, no good Jewish music.

Where would we go when weneed something to calm our jitterynerves after a long, stressful day in theoffice?

What would so many of us be lis-tening to without this awesome koshermusic?

Yes, this music is for all of us. Forthe Rebbe, the Rosh yeshiva, thebochur, the working guy, the mother oftwelve. Everybody.

This is why he is working so hard.So you and I can have something

to listen to when we’re down.So you and I can have something

kosher to listen to when we’re feelinguninspired and bored.



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So you and I can lift ourselves uphigher in our Avodas Hashem throughthe power of a Niggun.

Yes, that’s why.So that struggling yeshiva bochur

who is tempted to listen to some goodnon-Jewish music in order to de-stressafter a long hard day, now has some-thing good and kosher to listen to in-stead.

That’s why.The long hours of sweat and

strenuous effort this lone singer hasbeen spending every day in the studioare for you and me.

This man, through his untiring ef-forts to bring something good andoriginal to us, has now inspired thou-sands of people who perhaps felt dry intheir Yidishkeit and needed this lift sobadly.

This man, through his tear-jerkingand emotional English ballad, just ex-pressed the feeling that some seminarygirl was struggling for so long to putinto words.

These are just some of the peoplewho Mr. Singer has touched, inspired,and very often actually saved throughhis music.

He is the hero who, despite thefact that he’s saving lives, will oftenget criticized and labeled as an ego-centric celebrity, or Goyish singerwannabe, or whatever else some mis-guided extremist is in the mood ofthrowing out there.

Yet he takes it all in stride. Be-cause he realizes that Jewish music isnecessary, and part and parcel of ourspiritual growth as a nation.

These kosher outlets, and funsongs, are uniting people who are atodds with each other, and bringing abit of joy to the broken and depressed.

These singers are shelling outfifty thousand dollars or a hundredthousand dollars, whatever theamount, it doesn’t matter, on produc-ers and composers and arrangers andstudio time, just so we can have good,kosher, wholesome, fun and upliftingmusic.

This is why I go out and buy thesesingers’ albums with my hard-earnedmoney. This is why I shell out cash forthe latest album.

Sure, I could get it all for free andsave a whole lot of my limited dough.

But tell me, do you think thatwould be right of me?

Some singer has given thousandsof precious hours of his time, andthousands of dollars of his hard-earnedmoney, to uplift and possibly save thefuture of Klal Yisroel, and I can’t shellout a few dollars to support him?

So I say to you, my dear generousfriend, “I really do appreciate yourkind offer to load up my ipod for free.But, I want you to know that I owesomebody out there a big YasherKoach. And a few dollars is the least I

can do to show my appreciation forsaving my kids, and for saving our fu-ture.”

So my fellow music fans: Thenext time your kind and generousfriend offers to load up your ipod with8th Day’s latest, or Lipa’s newest, orFried’s greatest, for free, please thinkabout this article.

Dave Sharper

Dear Dave,Hey, what about my stuff??

CY



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There is a well-known anec-dote/legend that circulatesin the mussar/yeshiva cir-cles about a young yeshivastudent who left the yeshi-

va world and its environment to findhis fortune in far distant fields. At thetime that he left the yeshiva he had abeard and dressed modestly as was hisJewish tradition.

A decade later he met by chanceon the street the head of his formeryeshiva. The former student now wascompletely clean-shaven and dressedin the most modern and fashionablegarb of the time. Nevertheless, theold mentor recognized his former stu-dent and engaged him in conversa-tion.

He innocently asked him: “Since Iam not a man of the world and you ob-viously are, would you please answer afew questions that I have about the out-side society? Are most people happy ordepressed? Are most people satisfiedwith their wealth or do they considerthemselves to be poor? Are most peo-ple psychologically well adjusted orare they anxious and sometimes al-most insane? And finally, are mostpeople physically healthy or are theyafflicted with disease, discomfort andsome sort of illness?”

The student was taken aback bythis conversation but he dutifullyreplied: “Master, I must admit the truthto you. Most people are not happy,they do not consider themselveswealthy no matter how much moneythey have, many psychologists andtherapists are doing a thriving businessbecause a great deal of the world isdysfunctional and even somewhat

crazy, and those that are sick and ill, inpain and in anxiety, far outnumberthose who consider themselves com-pletely healthy, normal and well-ad-justed.”

To which the mentor commented:“So for such a sad, depressed, sick,poor world you removed your beard?!”

In our daily prayers we state:“That we should not toil for emptinessand nothingness nor should we havebeen born to be confused and de-pressed.” Judaism does not negate theoutside world. It is a practical religionthat deals with life as it is and does notmake unrealistic demands upon its ad-herents.

So even though the outside worldmay be one of poverty, mental strain,physical pain, suffering and constantfrustration; that is the world that welive in. We are not to shut ourselves inlonely solitude and become hermits.But, as I have often pointed out inthese columns, Judaism is always a re-ligion of balance.

And the balance here is not to al-low us to remove our beard, so tospeak, because of the pressures of theoutside world and our desire to con-form to its current standards and polit-ical correctness.

Like hundreds of millions, if noteven billions of others, I own a cellphone. I rarely use it and for most ofthe time it is in the off mode. I do sopurposely because I still value humanconversation face-to-face. My grand-children all text - they cannot spell cor-rectly and many times are flusteredwhen having to actually communicatewith another human being on a person-al and face-to-face basis.

The outside world tells me that Iam a Neanderthal, a relic of a long pastera. Maybe so, but I am not willing to‘shave my beard’ on this issue. It rep-resents to me a very advanced techno-logical world that is innately sad, poor,disconnected and in very many casesvery dysfunctional.

Ukraine, Syria, Lebanon, Egypt,Libya, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan,Congo, Zimbabwe, Bosnia, North Ko-rea and a host of other countries on theglobe are not pleasant places to cur-rently be in. In fact, large parts of theworld and of its billions of people areenveloped in sadness, violence, injus-tice and death.

If one does not have principlesand beliefs that transcend currentevents and the present situation of theoutside world then one is doomed tothis constant feeling of depression,tension and enormous frustration. TheTorah gave us a set of principles andbeliefs in order to be able to live insuch an uncomfortable world and yethave a feeling of satisfaction and ac-complishment.

The Torah promised us eternal lifeand unending memory. The Torahdeals with the myriad details of dailylife and weaves them together into atapestry of meaningful and satisfyingvalues. The sadness of the outsideworld can be somewhat ameliorated bya sense of serenity and accomplish-ment in our inner world. Prayer, study,charity, good thoughts and good be-havior are all part of building our innerworld and allowing us to successfullydeal with that most difficult and sadouter world. This is a daily lesson thatshould never be ignored.

A SAD, SADWORLD

BY RABBI BEREL WEIN

O P I N I O N

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The Littlest FirefighterThe 26-year-old mother stared

down at her son who was dying of ter-minal leukemia. Although her heartwas filled with sadness, she also had astrong feeling of determination. Likeany parent, she wanted her son togrow up and fulfill all his dreams.Now that was no longer possible. Theleukemia would see to that.

But she still wanted her son’sdreams to come true. She took herson’s hand and asked, “Bopsy, did youever think about what you wanted tobe once you grew up? Did you everdream and wish what you would dowith your life?”

“Mommy, I always wanted to be afireman when I grew up.” Mom smiledback and said, “Let’s see if we canmake your wish come true.”

Later that day she went to her lo-cal fire department in Phoenix, Ari-zona, where she met Fireman Bob,who had a heart as big as Phoenix. Sheexplained her son’s final wish andasked if it might be possible to giveher six-year-old son a ride around theblock on a fire engine.

Fireman Bob said, “Look, we cando better than that. If you’ll have yourson ready at seven o’clock Wednesdaymorning, we’ll make him an honoraryfireman for the whole day. He cancome down to the fire station, eat with

us, go out on all the fire calls, thewhole nine yards! And if you’ll giveus his sizes, we’ll get a real fire uni-form for him, with a real fire hat - nota toy one - with the emblem of thePhoenix Fire Department on it, a yel-low slicker like we wear and rubberboots. They’re all manufactured righthere in Phoenix, so we can get themfast.”

Three days later Fireman Bobpicked up Bopsy, dressed him in hisfire uniform and escorted him from hishospital bed to the waiting hook andladder truck. Bopsy got to sit on theback of the truck and help steer it backto the fire station. He was in heaven.

There were three fire calls inPhoenix that day and Bopsy got to goout on all three calls. He rode in thedifferent fire engines, the paramedic’svan, and even the fire chief’s car. Hewas also videotaped for the local newsprogram.

Having his dream come true, withall the love and attention that was lav-ished upon him, so deeply touchedBopsy that he lived three monthslonger than any doctor thought possi-ble.

One night all of his vital signsbegan to drop dramatically and thehead nurse, who believed in the hos-pice concept that no one should diealone, began to call the family mem-

bers to the hospital. Then she remem-bered the day Bopsy had spent as afireman, so she called the Fire Chiefand asked if it would be possible tosend a fireman in uniform to the hos-pital to be with Bopsy as he made histransition.

The chief replied, “We can dobetter than that. We’ll be there in fiveminutes. Will you please do me a fa-vor? When you hear the sirens scream-ing and see the lights flashing, willyou announce over the PA system thatthere is not a fire? It’s just the fire de-partment coming to see one of itsfinest members one more time. Andwill you open the window to hisroom?”

About five minutes later a hookand ladder truck arrived at the hospi-tal, extended its ladder up to Bopsy’sthird floor open window and five fire-fighters climbed up the ladder intoBopsy’s room. With his mother’s per-mission, they hugged him and heldhim and told him how much theyloved him. With his dying breath,Bopsy looked up at the fire chief andsaid, “Chief, am I really a firemannow?”

“Yes, Bopsy, you are a firemannow,” the chief said. With thosewords, Bopsy smiled and closed hiseyes one last time. He passed awaylater that evening.

InspirationThe Littlest Firefighter

A Boy’s Last WishThis touching story of a little boy’s last wish is taken from the book Chicken Soup

for the Soul. The book is filled with wonderfully inspirational stories, but this one isextra special. And best of all, it’s true! This little boy became the very first recipientof the now famous Make-A-Wish Foundation. May we all remember how preciouslife is, and how special the moment of death can be.



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Amessage every adult should read be-cause children are watching you anddoing as you do, not as you say.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawyou hang my first painting on the refrigerator,and I immediately wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawyou feed a stray cat, and I learned that it wasgood to be kind to animals.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawyou make my favorite cake for me, and Ilearned that the little things can be the specialthings in life.

When you thought I wasn’t looking Iheard you say a prayer, and I knew that there isa G-d I could always talk to, and I learned totrust in Him.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawyou make a meal and take it to a friend whowas sick, and I learned that we all have to helptake care of each other.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawyou take care of our house and everyone in it,and I learned we have to take care of what weare given.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawhow you handled your responsibilities, evenwhen you didn’t feel good, and I learned that Iwould have to be responsible when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawtears come from your eyes, and I learned thatsometimes things hurt, but it’s alright to cry.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I sawthat you cared, and I wanted to be everythingthat I could be.

When you thought I wasn’t looking Ilearned most of life’s lessons that I need toknow to be a good and productive person whenI grow up.

When you thought I wasn’t looking, Ilooked at you and wanted to say, ‘Thanks forall the things I saw when you thought I wasn’tlooking.’

Share this with all of the people youknow who do so much for others, but think thatno one ever sees. Little eyes see a lot.

Each of us (parent, grandparent, aunt, un-cle, teacher, friend) influences the life of achild. How will you touch the life of someonetoday? Just by showing this to someone else,you will probably make them at least thinkabout their influence on others.

Live simply. Love generously. Caredeeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest toHashem.

My dear girl, the dayyou see I’m gettingold, I ask you toplease be patient, butmost of all, try to un-

derstand what I’m going through. Ifwhen we talk, I repeat the same thinga thousand times, don’t interrupt tosay: “You said the same thing aminute ago.” Just listen, please. Try toremember the times when you werelittle and I would read the same storynight after night until you would fallasleep.

When I don’t want to take a bath,don’t be mad and don’t embarrass me.Remember when I had to run afteryou, making excuses and trying to getyou to take a shower when you werejust a girl?

When you see how ignorant I amwhen it comes to new technology, giveme the time to learn and don’t look atme that way. Remember, honey, I pa-tiently taught you how to do many

things like eating appropriately, get-ting dressed, combing your hair anddealing with life’s issues every day.

The day you see I’m getting old, Iask you to please be patient, but mostof all, try to understand what I’m goingthrough. If I occasionally lose track ofwhat we’re talking about, give me thetime to remember. And if I can’t, don’tbe nervous, impatient or arrogant. Justknow in your heart that the most im-portant thing for me is to be with you.

And when my old, tired legs don’tlet me move as quickly as before, giveme your hand the same way that I of-fered mine to you when you firstwalked. When those days come, don’tfeel sad… just be with me, and under-stand me while I get to the end of mylife with love. I’ll cherish and thankyou for the gift of time and joy weshared. With a big smile and the hugelove I’ve always had for you, I justwant to say, I love you my darlingdaughter.

WHEN YOU SEE ME GETTING OLD

WHEN YOU THOUGHT IWASN’T LOOKING

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held accountable when these youngwomen are exposed to the harsh lightof reality as they struggle to act asmother, wife and breadwinner with ahusband who, even if he desired to as-sist in supporting his family, has noneof the prerequisite experience or edu-cation?

Isn’t it time to admit we have ex-tended proper motivations to the pointof absurdity?

The Ohr HaChaim (Shemos18:21) questions why it was necessaryfor Yisro to be the one who advisedMoshe Rabbeinu to establish a systemof courts. After all, this suggests a lackof wisdom among Bnei Yisrael as nomember of the tribe had arrived at sucha solution. Not only that, but the Torahportion in which we are given theAseres Hadibros is named after thisnewcomer! He answers that this advicehad to come through Yisro to teach fu-ture generations that Jews have no mo-nopoly on intelligence and that weshould seek wisdom from all sources.

There are many faults and flaws inmodern, secular culture, and it is as as-tounding that we would need to turn tooutside wisdom for this truth as it wasin the case of Yisro. But can you imag-ine the reaction of single women insecular society who despair of everfinding a working man if they knew wewere actively encouraging our daugh-ters to seek men who have no means ofsupporting them?

We have become so accustomedto the situation that, like the proverbialfrog in the boiling water, we fail to rec-ognize how unnatural and dangerous itis. Throughout the ages, society - Jew-ish and non-Jewish - has recognizedthe obvious insanity of such a course.Why don’t we?

Ari Lapin is a medical student andentrepreneur who writes on Torah is-sues, politics and culture, and his ex-periences in the never dull world ofshidduchim. He can be reached viawww.arilapin.com.

WHAT WEREWE THINKING?

BY ARI LAPIN

product? Our girls have been trained,en masse with no regard for whether ornot they are suited for such a lifestyle,to ignore, repress and reject every urgethey have for self-preservation. Howour educators have managed to over-come thousands of years of maternalinstinct and biological imperative bog-gles the mind and should inspire vastamounts of research by anyone withtotalitarian ambitions.

We have arrived at a point wheresingle men defer leaving yeshiva to at-tend college or begin working becausethey fear the negative impact this willhave on their shidduch prospects! Thisis worlds away from the model demon-strated for us by Yaakov Avinu. TheSeforno explains (Bereishis 29:18)that Yaakov offered to work for Rachelfor seven years because he had arrivedat Lavan’s home penniless and withouta means of supporting a wife and chil-dren, and “there is no doubt that atzaddik wouldn’t marry a wife andraise children without the means ofsupporting them.”

We are doing these young womenand men a grave injustice. Entrustedwith their education, we have extolleda lifestyle that is antithetical to Torahand condemns many of them to a lifeof financial difficulty. Many studies re-veal that a primary cause of maritalconflict is financial stress. Today, withmarriage under attack on multiplefronts, do we truly feel comfortableadding the virtual certainty of mone-tary difficulties to the many challengesalready facing married couples?

Sowing the seeds of marital desti-tution and dissent, we saddle ourwomen with the curse of Adam in ad-dition to the curse of Chava. Who is

Aquick perusal throughnewspapers, magazinesand recent books revealsa plethora of titles suchas “The Pre-Adult Male:

Listless and Confused,” “Where Havethe Good Men Gone?” and “WhyThere Are No Good Men Left.”

These all bemoan the difficultythe modern woman has in finding aneducated and employed mate. Someposit that women have left men behindas they pursue higher education atgreater rates than men and are outper-forming and out-earning them in theircareers, which has resulted in a diffi-cult dating scene for successfulwomen seeking educated men with ajob. Per a recent study showing that 75percent of women wouldn’t date anunemployed man, this would seem tobe a widespread problem.

As you would expect of a nationwith the mission of being an ohr lagoy-im, we have avoided this problem en-tirely. In fact, we have pulled a hoax ofsuch proportions that one almost ex-pects to see the Elders of Zion crouch-ing in the shadows and pulling thestrings to effect it.

We have educated our youngwomen, our future wives and mothers,to believe that not only is a young manwith a job or a degree not to be soughtafter, but he is in fact someone to beavoided at all cost. Our daughters nowseek precisely those men who are inca-pable of supporting them and theirchildren.

While such an arrangement maybear fruit for the Rebbe Akivas andRachels among us, have we attainedsuch heights of hubris as to believethat our chinuch produces no other

If you’d like to “Sound Off”please send your submissions to:

SOUND OFFc/o Country Yossi Family Magazine

1310 48th Street, Suite 304Brooklyn, New York 11219

Submisssions should preferably be type-written,double-spaced and should not exceed 850 words.

S O U N D O F F

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springboard to discuss how youcan improve on making each otherhappier.

Then there are the children.The old adage; the best present youcan give to your children is more ofyour presence, is an extremely vitalconcept. So too is the famousacronym that the word familystands for father and mother I loveyou. How much do we invest in ourchildren’s happiness? Do we spendtime on the foods that they like,trips that they look forward to,clothes and shoes that they hopefor, vacations that they dreamabout, or shidduchim that theyworry about? Are we there forthem?

Then there are our parents.For grownups, it’s especially easyto forget our responsibilities, sincethey aren’t in front of us. TheGemara tells us, “Milsa d’loramya alei d’inshei lav adatei- thatwhich is not in front of us is easyto forget.” But the fifth command-ment demands from us to be for-ever vigilant in increasing our par-

ents’ joy. Sharing our ac-complishments with themand taking the time to vis-it and to call or even toemail and to text is a sureway to increase the happi-ness of those who are re-sponsible for our very ex-istence.

Last but not least, weshouldn’t forget the Ram-bam’s advice. There is nogreater joy than gladden-ing the heart of the widowand the orphan, the poorand the convert, makingtime for the lonely, cheer-ing up the elderly, the illand the forlorn. These aresure ways to make our twoAdars truly meaningful.

May it be the will ofHashem that we merit tomake many people happy.And in that zechus, maywe be blessed with longlife, good health, and allkinds of happiness.Sheldon Zeitlin takes dictation

and edits Rabbi Weiss’ articles.

The Joyof Adar

byRabbi Moshe Meir Weiss

commuting to work, making alivelihood, chauffeuring the chil-dren, doing homework, payingbills, running errands, cleaning,cooking, doing the laundry, and at-tending all kinds of simchos, thatall they have left is physical andmental collapse. Adar is a goodtime for a reality check. Am I liv-ing up to the commitment I madeunder the Chupa, to ensure my life-mate’s happiness? Find the timeduring the next two Adars to askyour spouse for a report card onyour relationship. It will be a

“Me’shenichnasAdar marbimb’simcha - withthe start of themonth of Adar,

we add to our happiness.” Thatmeans that this year we have a dou-ble dose of happiness, since there’sa Jewish leap year which containstwo Adars. It is interesting thatwhen the scholars discuss how toincrease one’s joy, they offer ideassuch as learning Torah, for there isno joy like the learning of Torah.Others suggest drinking a littlewine, since wine gladdensthe hearts of men.

When reflecting onthis question, I had a sud-den thought. Perhaps thesages are recommendingthat with the onset of Adarwe should make an in-creased effort at makingother people happy. Afterall, this is the season formishloach manos andmatonos l’evyonim, send-ing presents to our friendsand giving gifts to thepoor. It is the time thatMordechai and Estherstrove to reunite the Jew-ish people in brotherlylove.

Thus, we can suggestthat Adar is the time to re-search ways to bring yourspouse more happiness. Atthe very beginning of thispursuit is finding someavailable time to spendwith your mate. I knowmany couples that are soweary from the grind of

T O R A H

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Bubby always used to comeover for Chanuka licht.She so enjoyed watchingher einiklach say the bra-chos and light their meno-

ras. Afterward, she would distributeher Chanuka gelt, saying, “I don’tknow what to buy. You buy yourselvessomething” or “your mommy willknow what to buy for you.” No bigshows. Never looking for attention.Just Bubby giving her Chanuka pres-ents like she did everything else. Qui-etly, efficiently, without fanfare. Shenever expected anything in return.Bubby ALWAYS came for Chanukalicht. Where’s Bubby?

A few weeks ago our daughter,Bubby’s granddaughter, got engaged.The vort was in the house. A small,intimate affair with just two hundredof our closest friends! Bubby was al-ways at a simcha, no matter when itwas or where it was. Bubby had herplace, front and center, and everyoneknew Bubby. Grandchildren calledher Bubby; cousins “from the otherside” who weren’t really HER grand-children, called her Bubby. Ourfriends called her Bubby, and ourfriends’ children called her Bubby.Certainly everybody made sure towish Bubby a Mazel Tov, and Bubbymade sure to thank them and givethem her brachos. “Everybody” wasat the vort. “Everybody” was so hap-py. But “everybody” had the samethought in the back of their minds:Where’s Bubby?

Last night, another one of Bub-by’s granddaughters got married,b’shoah tova. Bubby loved chasunos!She’d wear one of her “fancy dresses”

that she had made up “special” in EretzYisrael. She’d call it brand new, eventhough we knew she had it for years.But, to her it was brand new. And, infact, she was correct. She so appreciat-ed everything she had; she was so con-tent and never “needed” anythingmore. It WAS brand new to her everytime she wore it!

Bubby would stand right by thekallah during the badeken. Who couldimagine the thoughts going throughher mind as she stood there surround-ed by her family? Was she remember-ing Kristalnacht when she was a merechild; or her own wedding in Shanghaiunder the bombs of World War II? Wasshe thinking about when she arrived inAmerica with nothing but the clotheson her back, or how, with Siyata D’sh-maya she built a beautiful home ofTorah, mitzvos and chesed? Could shehave been recalling how she stoodalongside her husband as he was mar-bitz Torah for almost half a century; ordwelling on how she was able to real-ize her duties as his Rebitzen with gra-ciousness and aplomb? Perhaps hermind was filled with memories of liv-ing “alone” as the head of the mish-pacha for 30 years, steadfastly dedicat-ed, loyal and true to her husband’smemory and mesorah?

Bubby loved to walk down theaisle at the chupa with one of her sonsor grandsons. She was so proud of herfamily, and she shepped so muchnachas from each and every one of herchildren, grandchildren and greatgrandchildren. Bubby accomplishedthe impossible; she actually had a per-sonal relationship with each and everyindividual! It made no difference if

they were 5 or 55, around the block oracross the ocean. On Erev Shabbos shewould be busy all day taking callsfrom grandchildren on two continentsand in three time zones. It was her fa-vorite day of the week!

Bubby wouldn’t “push” her wayinto the dancing. She’d go in to dancewith the kallah for a minute, and thenshe was more than pleased to standon the side and watch “her girls”dance. But when her sons and grand-sons would dance for HER, youcould FEEL her happiness filling theroom!

It was a beautiful chasuna lastnight. Bubby’s granddaughter marriedthe Rosh HaYeshiva shlita’s grandson.Bubby would have been so veryproud! But, Bubby didn’t stand by thebadeken, and she didn’t walk down theaisle. She didn’t dance with the kallah,and we didn’t get to dance for her. Themusic was loud and lebedik, but theunspoken voice was louder and evenmore powerful. “Where’s Bubby?” itsaid, over and over and over again.“Where’s Bubby?”

Bubby, z”l was there. So was Zei-dy, zt”l. And they are proud, so veryproud, of all their progeny. We could-n’t see them, but they were walkingdown the aisle with the choson andkallah. They stood under the chupa andthen they were dancing with theirgrandchildren. They were sheppingnachas from the doros THEY estab-lished, who are following the derechthat they taught us, by word and by ex-ample. Their life is our model. Our lifeshould be their reward.

Ateres zekanim bnai banim,u’tiferes banim avosam.

Where’s Bubby?By Avraham Y. Yosephson

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AN ECLECTIC COLLECTION OF NEWS ITEMS,FEATURES AND HUMOR WE JUST COULDN’T

FIT ANYWHERE ELSE!

Answer“This mainly matters if

you have sleep apnea,which is often worse onyour back,” said Dr. Carl W.Bazil, director of the divi-sion of epilepsy and sleep atNew York-Presbyterian/Co-lumbia University MedicalCenter. “Snoring is oftenworse as well, as many peo-ple can attest.”

Otherwise, for adults, itis much more importantwhat position is most com-fortable, Dr. Bazil said.Even in a favored position,though, nerve compressioncan occur if you do notmove during sleep. That ex-plains why you sometimesawaken with a bit of numb-ness for a few minutes. For-tunately, the body tends toreposition itself naturally.

For infants, the adviceis different. Since 1992, theAmerican Academy of Pe-diatrics has said that babiesshould sleep on their backs,even if being put down for ashort nap.

Although causality hasnot been shown, sleeping onthe stomach is one of theknown risk factors associat-ed with sudden infant deathsyndrome, or SIDS, alongwith general stress, expo-sure to tobacco smoke andoverheating.

After the academy’swidely publicized “Back toSleep” campaign was begunin 1994, a 1998 study foundthat the prevalence of in-fants placed on their stom-achs declined by 66 percent,and the rate of SIDS fellabout 38 percent.

WHAT’S A WORD

1. ARBITRATOR:

A cook that leaves Arby’sto work at McDonalds

2. AVOIDABLE:

What a bullfightertries to do

3. BERNADETTE:

The act of torchinga mortgage

4. BURGLARIZE:

What a crook sees with

5. COUNTERFEITERS:

Workers who put togetherkitchen cabinets

6. ECLIPSE:

What an English barberdoes for a living

7. EYEDROPPER:

A clumsy ophthalmologist

8. HEROES:

What a guy in a boat does

9. LEFTBANK:

What the robber did whenhis bag was full of money

10. MISTY:

How golfers create divots

11. PARADOX:

Two physicians!!

12. PARASITES:

What you see from the topof the Eiffel Tower

13. PHARMACIST:

A helper on the farm

14. RELIEF:

What trees do in the spring

15. RUBBERNECK:

What you do torelax your mother

16. SELFISH:

What the owner of aseafood store does

17. POLARIZE:

What penguins see with.

18. SUDAFED:

Brought litigation againsta government official

HOMOGRAPHS

Homographs are wordsof like spelling but with morethan one meaning. A homo-graph that is also pronounceddifferently is a heteronym.

You think English iseasy??

I think a retired Englishteacher was bored...THIS ISGREAT!

Read all the way to theend. This took a lot of workto put together!

1) The bandage waswound around thewound.

2) The farm was used toproduce produce.

3) The dump was so fullthat it had to refusemore refuse.

T I M E L I N E

-- QUESTION --IS IT BEST TO SLEEP ON YOUR

BACK, SIDE OR STOMACH?



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4) We must polish the Polish furni-ture.

5) He could lead if he would get thelead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert hisdessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like thepresent, he thought it was time topresent the present.

8) A bass was painted on the head ofthe bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove intothe bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.11) The insurance was invalid for the

invalid.12) There was a row among the oars-

men about how to row.13) They were too close to the door to

close it.14) The buck does funny things when

the does are present.15) A seamstress and a sewer fell

down into a sewer line.16) To help with planting, the farmer

taught his sow to sow.17) The wind was too strong to wind

the sail.18) Upon seeing the tear in the paint-

ing I shed a tear.19) I had to subject the subject to a se-

ries of tests.20) How can I intimate this to my

most intimate friend?

Let's face it - English is a crazylanguage. There is no egg in eggplant,nor ham in hamburger; neither applenor pine in pineapple. English muffinsweren't invented in England or Frenchfries in France. Sweetmeats are can-dies while sweetbreads, which aren'tsweet, are animal organs. We takeEnglish for granted. But if we exploreits paradoxes, we find that quicksandcan work slowly, boxing rings aresquare and a guinea pig is neither fromGuinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers writebut fingers don't fing, grocers don'tgroce and hammers don't ham? If theplural of tooth is teeth, why isn't theplural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2geese. So one moose, 2 meese? Oneindex, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazythat you can make amends but not oneamend? If you have a bunch of oddsand ends and get rid of all but one ofthem, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn'tpreachers praught? If a vegetarian eatsvegetables, what does a humanitarianeat? Sometimes I think all the Englishspeakers should be committed to anasylum for the verbally insane. In whatlanguage do people recite at a play andplay at a recital? Ship by truck andsend cargo by ship? Have noses thatrun and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fatchance be the same, while a wise manand a wise guy are opposites? Youhave to marvel at the unique lunacy of

a language in which your house canburn up as it burns down, in whichyou fill in a form by filling it out, andin which an alarm goes off by goingon.

English was invented by people,not computers, and it reflects the cre-ativity of the human race, which, ofcourse, is not a race at all. That is why,when the stars are out, they are visible,but when the lights are out, they are in-visible.

PS. Why doesn't 'Buick' rhymewith 'quick'?

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It’s 2:20am. Two weeks ago at thistime, I was pacing the floor of myliving room, wearing my rug thread-bare as I trudged back and forthwith my eyes drooping in sleep-dep-

rivation. In my arms was my chronicallyscreaming infant daughter. I patted her,sang to her and begged her to calm down.She just continued howling. It was almost4am by the time we both finally suc-cumbed to an exhausted sleep. That wasthe routine I had been blindly following formore than two months, despairing of everfinding rest, and giving up on the hope of ahappy, content baby. I lovingly nursed her,but it was a monumental sacrifice for me,rather than a relaxing exchange betweenmother and child. I was never sure if shehad eaten enough, as she never seemed sat-isfied. Both my daughter and I were miser-able - which is why I will be forever grate-ful to the friend who finally introduced meto an incredible product called Easy-Flow.

I’m sure my story will sound familiarto many. After my first 2-week stint of in-somnia, I seriously contemplated switchingfrom nursing to formula. It just wasn’tworking out, and I was ready to quit. Butonce I learned about the many benefits ofmother’s milk, bottle feeding became a farless optimal option for me. Aside from theincomparable bonding experience it cre-ates, breastfeeding stimulates the immunesystem, protecting against invasive dis-eases, viruses and cancers - even loweringthe risk of Leukemia by 30%. Additionally,nursing has been scientifically proven as anIQ-booster, providing proper nourishmentfor the brain in its earliest stages. It pre-vents obesity and eating disorders later onin the baby’s life and significantly lowersbaby’s risk of SIDS (Sudden Infant DeathSyndrome). With all its natural benefits,nursing was inarguably the superior feed-ing alternative. So instead of jumping ship,

I set out to find a way, if at all possible, tocontinue nursing without the crankiness.

I began asking people for advice andsoon found that many women shared simi-lar circumstances to mine. Some com-plained about colic and gassiness in theirinfants. Others sighed over nursing-in-duced irritation and soreness. Many weredespairing of ever enjoying their “bondingexperience.” And then finally, I met myfriend Mimi at the park. I casually men-tioned that my nursing was not all I hadhoped it would be. She nodded knowingly,and then whipped a bottle of Easy-Flowout of her pocketbook. “Easy-Flow,” sheconfidently asserted, “will change yourlife. Trust me. Just try it.” I began takingEasy-Flow twice a day, and I’ve neverlooked back since.

During my 2-month quest for an-swers, I learned many things about nursingthat I’d previously been unaware of. Ilearned that some women have a low milksupply, which results in an unsatisfied, un-happy baby. Other women have plentifulmilk, but still fail to satiate their baby’shunger due to poor milk consistency, dilut-ed quality, bitter taste or lack of nutrients.In some cases, mother’s milk cannot travelproperly for lack of conduit fluency - andthe frustrated baby cannot get enough. Attimes, superficial sores and skin conditionscan cause severe discomfort to the motherboth during and after nursing sessions.

Amazingly, the one natural, centuries-old antidote for all of these complicationsis Easy-Flow. This prize product fromSmiling Herbs both enhances and enrichesmother’s milk to its greatest advantage. It’sa healthy supplement that provides instan-taneous, positive results in many areas ofdifficulty. Easy-Flow aids smooth move-ment of the milk by ensuring consistencyand conduit clearance. It eliminates irrita-tion by targeting internal infection. It in-

creases baby’s appetite, making nursingsessions longer and more productive. Vitalminerals and nutrients give both motherand baby a healthy boost, as mom’s im-mune system is strengthened and resist-ance to infection and disease is fortified.One mother confided that she only beganusing Easy-Flow after twelve months ofnursing, when her milk supply graduallybegan to decrease. Easy-Flow reversed thedecline. With absolutely no side effects,Easy-Flow does not cause any reactions,allergic or otherwise. And best of all, Easy-Flow has a soothing effect on babies, tar-geting pressure points and eliminatingheadaches, upset stomachs, colic, gassi-ness, and other causes of stress or interfer-ence. It’s a favorite of mothers worldwide,who cannot help but rave about the incred-ible transformation that Easy-Flow hasbrought to their nursing sessions.

Recently, this standard herbal supple-ment was redesigned to contain a high-po-tency extract that is easy to take, with rev-olutionary results. The Smiling HerbsCompany saw the tremendous need for aproduct that would aid mothers significant-ly in their nursing. Using a precise pro-cessing system overseen by a highlytrained staff of field experts with extensiveknowledge of herbal history, SmilingHerbs reintroduced Easy-Flow to their ex-uberant customer base. The all-natural in-gredients are hand-selected for their physi-cal and chemical potential. Now small,easy-to-swallow capsules provide instantrelief in manageable dosages. While everymother needs to regulate her own dosage,most people see a definite improvementwith just two capsules a day. The feedbackthat Easy-Flow has received is overwhelm-ingly positive from their many satisfiedclients.

Now it’s 2:25am and the only reasonI’m still up is that I had to finish writingthis article, letting all the feeding-forlornmothers out there know about this unparal-leled product, so they too can upgrade theirnursing from bleary-eyed to beautiful.Mommies, don’t quit. Take Easy-Flow andget to enjoy the beauty, bounty, and bless-ing of your baby. Thank you, SmilingHerbs, for the miracle of quiet and content-ment that you’ve given me.

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EASY-FLOW: LITTLE ONE’S SERENITY,MOTHER’S BEST REMEDY

BY CHAYA SARA SCHLUSSEL

S P O T L I G H T

Smiling Herbs347-546-2792

[email protected]

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Dear Dr. D,My son has sprouted two new teeth behind his lower ba-

by teeth. The baby teeth do not seem to be loose and it lookslike he is growing two rows of teeth. Is this normal? Why isthis happening? What can and should be done in this situa-tion? My husband started calling my son Sharky!

Mother of a Shark

Dear Shark Mom,Many parents, just like you, become alarmed when they

look in their child’s mouth and see the permanent teethgrowing behind the baby teeth. What went wrong? Aren’tthe permanent teethsupposed to grow un-der the baby teethand just push themout?

Rest assured;permanent teeth com-ing in behind babyteeth are not neces-sarily an emergency!Ordinarily, as the per-manent teeth pushup, the roots of thebaby teeth dissolveand the baby tootheventually falls out, allowing the permanent teeth to comein. Sometimes, the baby teeth don’t want to leave the mouth,and the permanent teeth come in right behind them. Thiscondition is technically known as lingually eruptingmandibular incisors and more commonly known as sharkteeth or simply permanent teeth coming in behind babyteeth.

The picture below shows a close-view of the lower jawof a child with his permanent lower incisors coming in be-hind his baby incisors. The child’s parents let us know that,just as we guessed after the exam and Xray, about an hourafter this picture was taken one of the baby teeth fell out and

one week later the second fell out with some encouragementfrom child tooth wiggling. This was established with an easyXray showing very little baby tooth roots remaining. Sosometimes the body can correct the problem on its own!

The cause of ectopic and lingually erupting incisors isnot well established. There are a few theories as to whyshark teeth occur. Some believe that this occurs because theroots of the baby teeth don’t get dissolved like they normal-ly should and the permanent teeth have nowhere else to go,so they just come into the mouth where there is the leastamount of resistance. Others feel that the permanent teethstart growing in behind the baby teeth because there is toomuch crowding in the lower jaw. Another theory says thatbecause the permanent teeth develop behind the baby teeth,this is simply a slight deviation from normal and they justdidn’t make it as far forward as they should have. These aregood explanations as to why this phenomenon occurs. I per-sonally think that all three are possible explanations and anyof them might be true for a specific individual.

Permanent teeth growing in behind baby teeth are fair-ly common a condition, occurring in about 10% of all chil-dren. Luckily, many times shark teeth will resolve on theirown with the baby teeth eventually falling out. Sometimes,they don’t resolve on their own.

My suggestion is that if your child’s shark teeth don’tresolve on their ownwithin a couple ofweeks, it would be agood idea to haveyour dentist take alook at what’s goingon. An exam andXray will show howmuch of the root re-mains of the babytooth. Your child’sdentist, pediatric den-tist or oral surgeonwill be able to re-move the baby teeth

from your child’s mouth if needed, and this usually resolvesthe problem. If there is adequate room the permanent toothwill move right into place.

So in conclusion, keep in mind that shark teeth reallyaren’t abnormal. It happens to approximately 1 in 10 chil-dren. Most of the time, shark teeth will resolve without in-tervention (i.e. the baby tooth will fall out and the permanenttooth will assume its proper position). If they don’t, yourdentist can assess the situation and remove the lingering ba-by tooth if and when it is necessary.

Sincerely,Dr. Steven Davidowitz

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Dear Bubby,I am the proud mother of an 18-

year-old daughter. She is smart,beautiful and has wonderful middos.My husband and I are thrilled towatch her mature and thrive, as she iscurrently enrolled in college andseeking a degree. Many of her friendshave already begun dating and re-cently several got engaged. Mydaughter is completely ready to startthis parsha as well, and has been forquite some time. She is consumedwith the idea of dating and marriage;it is all she talks about. My husbandand I, on the other hand, do not feelshe is ready. In our opinion she is stillvery immature and has very little lifeexperience. We don’t feel she is pre-pared to make such an important de-cision about a lifetime partner. I amworried that she has not yet come in-to her own, and that she may regretany premature decisions that shemakes. I would love for her to waitanother year, but she thinks that isunfair. Not to mention that so manyof my own friends and colleaguesseem to react the same way. They saythat with the shidduch crisis the wayit is I’d have to be crazy to make herwait. I just don’t see what the bigrush is all about. I would love to seeher enjoy this year of her life, focus-ing on school, spending time withfriends and just being a kid. I don’tknow what to do and I know that if Imake her wait she will be really an-gry and it will cause a great deal offriction.

Sincerely,M.G

Dear M.G,Watching our children spread their

wings is both thrilling and scary all atonce. As parents, we want them to be in-dependent and self-sufficient, and yet weare never truly ready to have them growup. The stage that you all too soon findyourself in, is certainly daunting to saythe least. Your daughter feels she isready to start dating and has manyfriends who are already tying the knot.You feel that some more waiting timewould benefit her. No one in the worldknows your daughter better than you do.You have watched her take her first stepsand have been there every step of theway. Your perception of her is honestand you only have her best interests atheart. As she is still quite young, whynot give her some time to mature andfind herself so that she is betterequipped to make such a pivotal deci-sion. Rushing into things doesn’t usual-ly lend itself to smart decision making.Kids today are so eager to grow up andbegin dating that very often they aren’temotionally or financially ready for theseriousness of the undertaking. With thedivorce rate as high as it is, we must doeverything in our power to empower ourchildren and give them the foundationsto make smart decisions about their fu-ture.

As far as the shidduch crisis is con-cerned, it is true that there are far toomany singles desperately searching fortheir soul mates. However, there are al-so an exorbitant amount of unhappymarriages. There is no guarantee thatrushing into the dating scene will guar-antee happiness. We have a hishtadlusto try our best to meet our zivug, but al-

so a responsibility to be wise and makegood choices. Allowing our children theopportunity to grow up a bit and findthemselves to some extent can only em-power and enable them to make betterdecisions about their future.

Your concern that you will be thetarget of your daughters’ wrath is validand most likely true. But since whenhave our children’s tantrums been a le-gitimate reason to cave, especially whenit comes to the big things? Her angerand/or frustration will eventually be re-placed with gratitude and understand-ing. As adults with life experience, weknow more and we know better. Holdstrong to your principles and don’t al-low her resentment to sway your deci-sion.

As we raise our children we try toinstill in them all of the values and lifelessons that we feel they will need intheir later years. We try so hard to pro-tect them from any sort of pain and wedo anything and everything to make surethey’re happy. However, a point does ar-rive in which we can no longer protectthem from all of life’s inevitable growingpains. A time will come very soon whenyou have to let go of the reigns and al-low her to begin dating. The choice towait another year is worthwhile, but beprepared for that year to fly by. In ayear’s time, you may not find yourselffeeling any more ready than you do now,nor find her significantly more mature.Nonetheless, you will need to put yourfaith in Hashem and in the many lessonsyou’ve instilled in her.

Wishing you hatzlach!Love,

Bubby

Dear BubbyIf you would like advice from Bubby send your letters to:

Bubby, c/o Country Yossi Family Magazine, 1310 48th Street, Suite 304, Brooklyn, New York 11219or Fax to (718) 851-2510 or email [email protected]

WAIT TO DATE?

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Before you reach for thathamantash in the mishloachmonos basket, think aboutthis:

There’s no denying that we love oursweet treats. Former President RonaldReagan had to have jellybeans on hisdesk at all times. Vending machines inschools, offices, and everywhere else se-duce us to eat sweets throughout the day.With sales of sodas, candy, and othersweets soaring, it’s clear that, as a na-tion, we are virtually addicted to sugar inall its glorious forms.

While sugar is not literally addict-ing, scientists long ago proved thatpeople are born with a preference forsweets. This innate desire does not dis-appear as we grow older. Some peoplefind it impossible to leave the dinnertable without dessert; others can’t fath-om a day without chocolate. Manywomen blame hormonal surges for thesweet cravings they get around thesame time each month.

The results of this sugar “addic-tion” are not always so sweet. Sugarand other sweeteners add calories withlittle nutritional value and have nodoubt helped contribute to our epidem-ic state of obesity. A lack of exerciseand excessive calories from many oth-er sources share the blame.

Cavities and CaloriesSugar has been blamed for every-

thing from diabetes, tooth decay, obe-sity, and heart disease to disruptive be-havior in the classroom. But sugar byitself will not cause any of these con-ditions - except cavities. “Sweets candefinitely increase the risk of cavitieswhen the sweetened substances poolaround the teeth or sticky sweets ad-here to the surface of the tooth,” saysAtlanta dentist James Sylvan, DDS.

Aside from that, a comprehensivereview of scientific research, publishedin the journal Nutrition Research in1997, showed that sugar is not a directcause of heart disease, diabetes, obesi-ty, or hyperactivity. A more recent gov-ernment report concurs that sugar isnot by itself linked to any of those con-ditions. However, too many calories, inany form, can contribute to obesity, di-abetes, and heart disease.

The Blood-Sugar Roller CoasterChanges in our behavior are often

attributed to changes in our blood sug-ar levels. When you consume a mealmade up of simple, refined carbohy-drates - like a doughnut or a soft drink- the result is a spike in blood sugar.Your body responds to this spike by se-creting large amounts of insulin to nor-malize your blood sugar level.

In response to the insulin, yourblood sugar level drops quickly, leav-ing you with a feeling of sluggishnessand irritability.

When your blood sugar gets toolow, hunger reappears, and the roller-coaster ride resumes - that is, if yournext meal is also mostly simple refinedcarbohydrates. These are the carbohy-drates that the diet books denounce,not the healthy, fibrous carbohydratesthat come from whole fruits, vegeta-bles, and whole grains. If, instead ofeating simple carbs by themselves, youchoose these healthy carbohydrates oradd some protein or fat to your meal,your blood sugar will rise and fallmore normally without the negativeside effects.

Craving That Sweet StuffWhen we say we have a sugar ad-

diction, we may mean anything from amild desire to intense cravings for

sweet foods and drinks. Some peoplego so far as to equate the effects ofsugar to a drug, saying it calms themand helps them deal with stress.

The U.S. Department of Agricul-ture’s Food Guide Pyramid recom-mends we limit added sugars in our di-et to 12 teaspoons per day. But the re-ality is that in 2001, the average Amer-ican ate and drank the equivalent of 31teaspoons of sugar daily.

It sounds insane, but sugar findsits way into virtually every kind ofprocessed food, from ketchup to soupsand, especially, soft drinks. One 12-ounce can of soda contains approxi-mately 10 teaspoons of sugar. As ifthat is not bad enough, government da-ta suggest that we consume an averageof 41.4 gallons of soda per person an-nually. That’s a lot of sugar - and extracalories!

Sugars have 4 calories per gram,or 15 calories per teaspoon. So if youwant to shave calories, it’s a good ideato limit added sugar in your diet.Sounds simple enough, but what aboutthose hard-to-ignore cravings?

Here’s the trick: Gradually de-creasing the amount of sugar you eat,and how often you eat it, will help youreduce your desire for sugars whilelowering your caloric intake. Oldhabits are hard to break, but makingsmall and gradual changes in your eat-ing style will help you break free fromyour sugar addiction.

Many people newly diagnosedwith diabetes find that after they starteating fewer sweets, foods like freshfruit taste sweeter and can satisfy theircravings for sweets. Remember, mod-eration is the key. If you can controlthe quantity, you will be able to enjoysweets on occasion.

Rochelle’s tips to help you break thesugar habit:

• Read the label on all processedfoods. Check the amount of sug-ars, and choose products with theleast sugar per serving.

• Become familiar with sugar termi-nology. Recognize that all of thefollowing are sweeteners: cornsyrup, high fructose corn syrup,sucrose, dextrose, honey, mo-lasses, turbinado, and brown sugar.

How Sweet

it iSn’t!By RocHelle elBogen, cSpn, cft

Continued on Page 107

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“Iam not asking for my child tobe the life of the party, or asocial butterfly. I just wanther to be happy and havesome friends of her own. She

is a wonderful kid, and I hope somedayothers can see that.”

Many parents of children withdeficits in social skills echo this senti-ment. They know that their child hasmany wonderful qualities to offer others,but their poor social skills often hamperthem from establishing meaningful rela-tionships. All children want desperatelyto have friends, but those who lag behindtheir peers in social competence oftenfail miserably when trying to makefriends.

When a friend of mine expressedconcern that her ten-year-old daughterShifra was unhappy in school and had nofriends, I suggested she find a way to ob-serve her daughter closely when interact-ing with peers. That opportunity came upwhen Shifra’s teacher grouped the stu-dents for a class project, placing Shifrawith two other girls to work on a poster.

Shifra’s mother invited the girls toher home after school to work on theproject there. Her daughter was delight-ed at this rare social opportunity. This iswhat her mother observed:

“The two other girls were tryinghard to create a poster while Shifra wasclowning around, doing childish anticsand showing off. One of the girls got up-set and decided to go home before thework was half-finished. The other girlbecame provoked by Shifra’s behaviorand a fight broke out, with both endingup in tears. Shifra was miserable. ‘I wasjust trying to have fun,’ she sobbed.‘Everyone’s so mean to me.’”

For most children, basic socialskills (e.g. initiating conversation, work-

ing cooperatively, respecting boundaries,observing conventional rules of cour-tesy) are acquired naturally. But for oth-ers, the process is much more difficult.Whereas many children learn these basicskills simply by exposure to social situa-tions and positive role models, thosewith social skills deficits often need to betaught skills explicitly.

Nonverbal CommunicationChildren like Shifra may not have a

reading disability in the usual sense butthey are often unable to “read” cues re-lated to social information, particularlynonverbal cues or “body language.” Orthey may read the cues but fail to gaugethe strength of the emotions conveyed.

In understanding how these chil-dren repeatedly suffer failure in socialsituations, it’s important to note that ver-bal language alone will often not conveyall the information needed to understanda given social situation.

According to experts, between 25 to65 percent of the communication in anaverage conversation is actually nonver-bal, consisting of information that is re-lated by facial expression, vocal intona-tion, pauses in the conversation, andbody language.

These nonverbal messages must beprocessed together with the verbal com-munication for the true overall meaningto emerge. Those with nonverbaldeficits, however, may be forced to relyon as little as 35 percent of the commu-nication in order to discern what is beingrelayed and how to respond. It is no won-der, then, that the messages they receiveare often skewed and misleading.

This holds true not only in socialsituations but in an academic setting aswell, which explains why children withsocial skills deficits often experience

learning difficulties.Consider the following social inter-

actions between six-year-olds that high-light the breakdown in communicationwhen, due to lapses in social skill devel-opment, nonverbal messages are not ab-sorbed.

Eli and Meir are playing “Hatza-lah.” They strap on walkie talkies andzoom off in make-believe Hatzalah cars(scooters) to a Hatzalah call, while theysimulate the wail of sirens.

Moshe comes along and asks toplay. “I wanna be a Hatzalah guy, too,”he tells them. “I can go on back of yourscooter,” he suggests hopefully.

Eli and Meir are clearly not inter-ested and their faces show it. (non-verbalcommunication) Eli moves his body toblock the space behind him so Moshecannot get on (body language). Withoutpausing to register that he is not wanted,Moshe turns swiftly to Meir and boardshis scooter before Meir can block him.

“Hey, get off!” Meir yells.“Why? There’s room for me in

back!” whines Moshe.“Tough. We don’t let,” Meir snaps,

pushing him off.Crestfallen, Moshe gives the scoot-

er a kick and the scooter and Meir fallover together. Meir jumps up and shovesMoshe. In a moment, the two are fight-ing fiercely. Eli joins the fray. No one isseriously hurt, but Moshe, by his re-sponse to rejection, has reinforced thevery dynamics that precipitated that re-jection in the first place.

In this typical conflict - that has athousand variations wherever childrenare playing together - what is striking isthat, in an effort to gain entry to thegame, Moshe chooses the very tactics(aggressiveness, force) that are guaran-teed to trigger if not intensify his socialexclusion.

With the benefit of coaching in so-cial skills, Moshe would have picked upthe cues that Eli and Meir were setagainst him “piggy backing” on the backof their scooters. He might then have ex-plored other avenues besides force togain inclusion.

He might have offered to be the“patient” that the “Hatzalah guys” wereon their way to help, or to be a police-man who directs traffic or accompaniesthe Hatzalah members on foot. By beingreasonable and flexible, choosing to add

WHO’S LOOKING FOR

A SOCIAL BUTTERFLY?BY RIFKA SCHONFELD, DIRECTOR OF S.O.S.

(STRATEGIES FOR OPTIMUM SUCCESS)

HEALTH & ADVICE



85

something to the game instead of taking over the game, Moshecould have turned the situation around completely.

Similarly, had Shifra grasped the extent to which her class-mates were put off by her inappropriate behavior, the outcomemight have been very different. Instead, she misread theirprotests and the strength of their objections and persisted inthinking she could drag them along into “having fun” with her.

She was devastated when the get-together at her house - asocial opportunity she had longed for - disintegrated. And shehad no clue about what she had done to precipitate this turn ofevents.

“I used to think she was just immature,” her mother said.“But it’s more than that. It’s like she’s missing out on a certainsixth sense about how to behave that for most people comesnaturally.”

Early InterventionSpecial education experts are increasingly placing stress

on a child’s social competence as a critical developmentalprocess that is every bit as important as scholastic achievement- and perhaps more so. Without intervention - and the earlier thebetter - they say, children who demonstrate poor social skillsmay continue to experience problems into middle childhoodand beyond that affect all facets of life.

One of the most important things parents can do for chil-dren with social skills deficits is an obvious and simple one: ob-serve them in interactions with others whenever possible. Thiswill enable you to gain a deeper understanding of their socialstrengths and weaknesses.

In addition, the following steps, advocated by Dr. RichardLavoie, a widely acclaimed expert in special education, haveproven very helpful.

• Design an unobtrusive “signal system” with the child touse in social situations. For example, if the child tends to“perseverate” (talking about only one topic of scant inter-est to the listener) or excessively tease or roughhouse, de-sign a signal (cross your arms, snap your finger) that alertshim to stop. In this way, you can halt troubling behaviorswithout causing undue embarrassment.

• Establish reward systems to reinforce and recognize ap-propriate social behavior. Be willing to recognize and re-inforce even the smallest signs of progress and growth. Donot harp on the inevitable setbacks in your child’s socialinteractions.

• Continually reinforce social information. Many social skilldeficits are caused by a lack of basic social information,such as how to break the ice when being introduced tosomeone. Tips, such as smile; nod cordially; make eyecontact; ask a question; offer to help in some way, mayseem self-evident but they are far from obvious to the so-cially inept.

• Provide the child with a positive model of appropriate so-cial skills. Be certain that your behavior mirrors the skillsthat you are teaching your students (e.g., temper control,courteous listening).

• Role-play situations where the child is prompted to em-pathize with another person or practice new social skills bysimulating life-like situations that call for the exercise ofthose skills (asking directions; working out a disagree-



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ment; apologizing; giving praise;initiating or disengaging from aconversation).

• Don’t discourage the child from es-tablishing relationships with stu-dents who are a year or twoyounger. He may be seeking his de-velopmentally or emotionally ap-propriate level. By befriendingyounger students, he may enjoy adegree of status, confidence and ac-ceptance that he does not experi-ence among his peers.

• Don’t place the child in highly-charged, competitive situations.These are often a source of greatanxiety and failure for students withlearning problems and socialdeficits. Rather, focus upon partici-pation, enjoyment, contribution andsatisfaction in competitive activities- not on winning or losing.

• Don’t scold or reprimand the childwhen she tells you about social con-frontations or difficulties that shehas experienced. She will respondby refusing to share these incidentswith you. Rather, thank her for shar-ing the experience with you and dis-

cuss optional strategies that shecould have used.

• Don’t attempt to teach social skillsat times of high stress. Rather, ap-proach the child at a time when heis relaxed and receptive. (ex: “Suri,next week you will be going to Fay-gie’s birthday party. Let’s practicehow you will hand her your gift andwhat you will say when she opens itand thanks you.)

Seize the SummerHelping a child overcome a deficit

in this area, like any other form of reme-diation, is a process that takes time. Be-cause summer vacation offers an ex-panded range of social opportunities thatare not available during the more struc-tured winter months, this is an ideal timefor social skills coaching.

Within the framework of camp,group sports, family outings and neigh-borhood get-togethers, the particular so-cial skills that are being worked on canconstantly be tested “in the field.” In ad-dition, because of the more relaxed paceof day-to-day life, progress is more easi-ly measured and observed.

Inasmuch as social skills deficitsoften accompany learning difficulties, aprogram that combines the two formsof remediation, implemented over thesummer months, can make an enor-mous difference in your child’s devel-opment. Those children whose parentssee to it that they capitalize strongly onthe summer’s opportunities for emo-tional and scholastic growth are thelucky ones.

An acclaimed educator and educa-tion consultant, Mrs. Rifka Schonfeldhas served the Jewish community forclose to thirty years. She founded anddirects the widely acclaimed education-al program, SOS, servicing all gradelevels in secular as well as Hebrew stud-ies. A kriah and reading specialist, shehas given dynamic workshops and hasset up reading labs in many schools. Inaddition, she offers evaluations G.E.D.preparation,, social skills training andshidduch coaching, focusing on buildingself-esteem and self-awareness. She canbe reached at 718-382-5437 or [email protected]. You canview the web at rifkaschonfeldsos.com.



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Let me introduce myself. Ihave been a member ofHatzalah for 19 years, andabout 16 of them as a para-medic. I also serve an ad-

ministrative role in the Queens divi-sion of the organization. Besides myHatzalah activities I’m a volunteerwith Torah Anytime, where I recordand upload onto the web Torah shi-urim in Kew Gardens Hills, NY, whereI live, as well as coordinate much ofthe uploading on this website. This ison top of a full time job and regularlearning schedule. As you can proba-bly tell from my mini-resume, I’m that“type A” personality that never sits stillfor a second. Last week I took a flightto Eretz Yisroel, as I try to do everyyear, to visit the mekomos kedoishem.

In middle of the flight (towardsthe latter half) I started getting somechest pain. It lasted about 5 minutesand it went away. I didn’t think any-thing of it as I figured that I’m way tooyoung for this to be heart related.About an hour and a half before ourscheduled landing I noticed what feltlike a drop in altitude, and the “littleplane” icon on the TV screen (indicat-ing our flight’s progress) started mak-ing a U-turn. Five minutes later the pi-lot announced that a smoke detectorhad gone off in one of the bathroomsand we would be making an emer-gency landing in Athens, Greece.Sometime after we landed I had a sec-ond episode of chest pain, which alsowent away after 5 minutes. I thought tomyself that when I get to Israel Iwould go to Terem just to see what’sgoing on but, again, I didn’t thinkmuch of it. About an hour later they

announced that they were going tohave us disembark and go to a hoteluntil the technicians from Israel couldget to Athens and fix the problem.While we were disembarking I startedto have another episode of chest pain,and this one lasted longer and wasstronger. I got to the terminal and wentto some benches to sit down when asecurity guard told me I was going thewrong way. I told him I wasn’t feelingwell and he offered to call a doctor forme. At first I turned down his offer, butafter a few minutes I figured why notget an EKG here already, as my planewasn’t leaving for a few hours anyway.I still did not believe this could reallybe heart related. While we were wait-ing for the ambulance, the pain wentaway. An ambulance came and theytook me to a clinic in the airport. (I gotthe EMT/Medic all upset when, first, Irefused to sit in a wheelchair and then,as soon as I saw the cardiac monitor inthe ambulance, I started hooking my-self up). They took an EKG in the clin-ic and I asked them to show it to me.At first all I noticed was some minorchanges in my EKG (but definitelyheart-related changes) and I thought,“Look at that, it is cardiac related.” (Iwas looking at it with tunnel vision,ignoring the clear indications of a ma-jor heart attack). The doctor there tookout the appropriate medications for aheart attack. I asked him why he wasdoing that, and he said, “Protocol.”They then gave me some Aspirin(again appropriate for a heart attack).At some point the chest pain cameback and they gave me Morphine. Icouldn’t understand why the doctorwas making such a fuss. I asked him to

let me get a better look at the EKG andthat is when I noticed the EKG indica-tions of a heart attack. By now I real-ized I was having a major heart attackand I asked them if they had a cardiaccath lab close by (to put in a stent, themost definitive care for this type ofheart attack). He told me an ambulancewas on the way to take me there.

What was going through my mindnow was: Here I am, a stranger in astrange land. I don’t speak the lan-guage, and I don’t know a thing abouttheir medical care, hospitals, etc. I re-called an old joke (that is so true),“Anywhere you go in the world youwill find Chabad and Coca Cola.” Ibegged the staff to find some way tolet me talk to my wife in the States, asneither of my two cell phones wasworking in Greece. One staff memberwas eventually nice enough to call mywife on his cell phone. I told her whatwas going on and said to her, “Findthat Chabad guy!” While waiting forthe ambulance the chest pain was get-ting pretty bad so I asked for somemore morphine. They gave me somemore but it didn’t help. When the am-bulance arrived they started gettingready to move me to the stretcher,when suddenly I felt extremely dizzy. Isaid something like “Wow, I just gotvery dizzy.” The next thing I knew Ifelt like I was being dragged out of avery deep sleep. I felt totally drainedof any energy and I noticed all themedical staff rushing around likechickens without a head. It remindedme of a scene I have witnessed manytimes in my paramedic career: thescene of a cardiac arrest (except nor-mally I’m on the other side of this or-ganized chaos). I remember askingone of the staff if I just had a cardiacarrest, to which at first he said some-thing like, “Don’t worry.” When Ipressed him, he admitted he justshocked me back. Physically I wasawake but mentally I was not process-ing everything. The next thing I no-ticed (which may have been right awaybut as just mentioned I was in such adaze I wasn’t sure of everything goingon around me) I was being put on ascoop (a type of patient-moving de-vice). I did not miss the groans as theyshlepped me over. During the ride tothe hospital the gravity of the whole

MY GREEKEXPERIENCE

BY MEIR SOMMERS

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situation really hit me. I decided that itwas a good time to say Viduy and She-ma just in case (as I learned in mymany halacha shiurim is recommend-ed for all choleh mesukanim). I alsonoticed I had this acute, strange, pro-ductive cough (consistent with symp-toms of heart failure). My only conso-lation was that I did not feel any im-pending doom, which all the textbookssay is something a person about to dieusually feels (and I know it is truefrom many of my patients who did notmake it).

When they wheeled me into theEmergency Room the scene was typi-cal of any New York Emergency Roomwhen a heart attack patient is broughtin (except it was all Greek to me).They hung another appropriate IVmedication and gave me a pill which Inearly threw right up. I was still in adaze and by now the chest pain wasconstant. A few minutes later, theywheeled me up to CCU. I asked whathappened to the cath lab and they saidsomeone was currently on the tableand I would be next. I later found outfrom the Chabad rabbi that the day Ilanded was the biggest national holi-day in Greece. As such, there was on-ly a “skeleton crew of those who drewthe short straw.” I was still out of it andhad no concept of time, but sometimelater they undressed me and took me tothe cath lab (the Greek concept oftzniyus hasn’t changed any in 3000years). As they undressed me they tookfrom me my wallet and 2 cell phonesand I noticed that my Verizon cell sud-denly had bars of service. (I laterfound out that after hanging up withme, my wife called my sister andbrother in Israel and at my brother’ssuggestion, my wife’s next call was toVerizon to get an international planadded to my line). I asked them to letme make a quick call, which they flat-ly refused (rightfully so). They tookme down to the cath lab andopened/stented the artery. I laterlearned that I had a 100% blockage ofone of my main coronary arteries, oneof the most lethal types of heart attack.The next 18 hours or so are still a buzz,but I slowly came back to reality.

When I got back to CCU I got myphone and watch back, and started toget back to time. I remember it was

about 11AM. As I mentioned, mybrain was not fully functioning yet, sothe first person I called was my broth-er as I didn’t want to wake my wife.After he yelled at me, I called my wifeand then my sister, as my brother in-formed me that her house was “HQ.” Ifound out that the Chabad rabbi wason his way to the hospital (he trackedme down thru EL-AL). I had to lie flatwith a sandbag on the cath site forwhat I thought was to be 6 hours (as itusually is in the USA) but turned outto be 24. At about 3PM (maybe a little

earlier) the Chabad rabbi got there,and as mentioned, he informed meabout the holiday. He also mentionedthat I was in a public hospital that hehad never visited a patient in before.He was able to translate for me so Icould get some basic information fromthe staff that I could neither have askfor, nor understood. He then informedthem of my religious diet restrictionsand that he would provide all meals.They gave him instructions on what Ican have (I later learned the rabbi runsa restaurant to support the Chabad ac-



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tivities, which is apparently not un-common for Chabad).

When the rabbi left I called ortexted my Hatzalah coordinator to lethim know what was going on. My first24 hours in the hospital was mostly adaze. I remember bits and pieces, suchas they gave me a urinal and after anunsuccessful hour they gave me a “15minute warning to Foley.” Somehowthat worked! The Chabad rabbibrought me low sodium (i.e. no salt)vegetable soup for dinner, but I had noappetite. I couldn’t drink either. Beforehe left, the Chabad rabbi asked me ifthere was anything else I needed and Isaid “a fan!” It was mega hot. He toldme he would work on it and about11PM someone actually showed upwith my biggest piece of lifesavingequipment, a fan! By Thursday nightmy mom tracked down my luggage, inthe EL-AL lost and found. They gaveus 3 options on what to do with it. 1:Wait until I get to Israel and pick upmyself. 2: Put it on my brother’s planeback to Greece, or 3: Give my brothermy passport and an authorization letterto let him retrieve it in Israel. We de-

cided to wait until I got to Israel, but inretrospect that was a bad mistake as Ihad no clothing in Greece.

By the next morning I was cov-ered in a film of sweat and other thana sheet I had no clothing. I had to usemy shirt, the only thing I could reach,as a gartel so I could daven and makeberachos. In middle of the night I hadto use the urinal but couldn’t find it. Iwas stuck in bed with a sandbag on myleg. After calling a nurse for 5 minutesstraight I pulled off one of my 3 EKGwires and it took the nurse 15 to 20minutes to investigate (sounds com-forting). At first I learned that the ini-tial blood work came back negative fora heart attack (false info) and every-thing else was looking good. I had onemore episode of that strange produc-tive cough, and I felt the need to take afew deep breaths once or twice, but bynoon all symptoms were resolved.Clinically I was feeling 100% better.

I called the Hatzalah medical di-rector, a cardiologist, at about 7AMNew York time, as my Hatzalah coor-dinator told me that’s about when heleaves shul. I asked if I had to stay for

Shabbos or can I sign out against med-ical advice. He said based on what I’mtelling him it was ok to leave (theGreeks said initially 8 days) but heneeded more concrete facts. SomehowI got the Hatzalah medical director totalk to my doctor in Greece, who cor-rected my false information about justhow bad it actually was. Based on myactual test results the Hatzalah doctorsaid I should stay the weekend. I laterfound out that the doctor had no inten-tion of allowing me to leave beforeShabbos, but he just told me that to tryto calm me down. I was not very hap-py to be in a hospital for Shabbos, butI didn’t have much of a choice. How-ever, I bargained with my attendingphysician and demanded that if I stay Ibe allowed the right to use a bathroominstead of a bed pan. She begrudging-ly agreed, on the condition that I sit inthe wheelchair to make the 10-foot tripto the bathroom. About 4PM someonefrom the staff asked me for my phonenumber as “someone” was trying toget in touch with me. I gave it to themand a minute later I got a call from theUS embassy in Greece asking if there



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was anything I needed or anythingthey could do for me. I thanked herprofusely and told her no. She gave meher name and number and said if therewas anything I needed I should callher.

Moving to a different side of thestory, by Thursday afternoon my fami-ly members on both sides of the globewere in constant communication and itwas decided that my brother andbrother-in-law from Israel would cometo Greece to help me out. When theyarrived Friday morning they took atrain to the closest stop by the hospital.When they got out of the train a carpulled up next to them and asked themin Hebrew if they needed a ride. Thedriver was an Israeli woman who wasrelocated by her employer to Athensabout 25 years ago. She had a flat tirethat day. As such, she was taking a dif-ferent route home when she just “hap-pened” to see two guys withyarmulkas walking out of the train sta-tion. On the ride to the hospital theytold her their story and that was it. Sheimmediately adopted them as herchesed project. She accompanied themon every trip to the hospital, shopping,etc. She brought them food (onlykosher, even though she herself is only“traditional”), and acted as their offi-cial guide and translator. Mi K’amchaYisrael.

Getting back to my story, Shabboswas rather uneventful. My family’s Is-raeli “tour guide” walked them to visitme and back to their hotel room forboth visiting hours - er, make that vis-iting 15 min. It was a very lonelyShabbos. The only real change wasthey allowed me to get out of bed andmove around my cubicle, but no fur-ther. By Motzai Shabbos I was reallystarting to feel it. The boredom, to-gether with the humidity, added to thefact that they refused to let me shower,led me to be totally miserable. The on-ly good news I had gotten was Shab-bos’s lab results were getting better. Atthis point I started viewing my CCUcubicle as my “prison cell,” my EKGwire as my “ball and chain,” and mycurtain as my “bars.” I was miserable!

On Sunday at about 1PM (6AMNew York time) the Hatzalah doctorcalled me and asked me how my Shab-bos was, and to update him on my

progress. I told him that I was miser-able and asked him, “Now that my labresults are getting better, can I leave?”(This was against medical advice, asthe Greek doctors still wouldn’t let meleave my cubicle). Considering howmiserable I was, as well as how muchstress I was under from the environ-ment, the Hatzalah doctor said yes.But he wanted me to stay until Mon-day morning and go straight to the air-port from the hospital. Before we hungup he said he cannot actually give methat advice until he speaks to the at-

tending physician in Greece to makesure all information was getting backto him accurately. About 7PM localtime (12PM NY time) the Hatzalahdoctor called and told me that he had achat with the attending doctor and dis-cussed my discharge. They had wantedto keep me until Thursday but he saidhe thought I would be ready to be dis-charged Monday morning. She wasready to compromise. She would orderanother set of lab tests Monday firstthing in the morning. If the tests cameback ok, she would discharge me on



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Tuesday morning. The Hatzalah doc-tor said he would recommend I stay,but said he thinks the only way I wouldagree is if she lets me shower. Sheagreed but on 3 conditions. 1. Not formore than 2 minutes, 2. Sitting only,and 3. Again I couldn’t walk the 10feet to the bathroom, but must use awheelchair. I finally got my shower!My brother was able to get me cleanunderwear and for the first time I actu-ally felt half human again. I still hadnot slept more than a 2-hour clip sinceWednesday morning, but my mom hadsuggested I ask for a sleeping pill. I didthat right after my shower and I sleptfor 9 hours straight. In the morning Iwas a different patient.

They had done all the tests byabout 12PM. The results came backbetter than expected. I called my momand told her I was ready to go. Howev-er, we still had some issues. EL-ALhad told my mom that I would needmedical clearance before they wouldlet me fly and the Greek doctor would-n’t let me fly until at least 2 weeks af-ter the event. Personally, I felt spend-ing 2 weeks in a Greek hotel roomwould give me another heart attack!So, we started reaching out to BennyFisher in Israel to see if he could getEL-AL to let us fly. The Hatzalah doc-tor agreed that I was safe to make theflight from Greece to Israel and wasprepared to write a letter as such.While we were waiting to hear backfrom Benny Fisher I remembered thatMoishy, one of the Hatzalah para-medics, was in Israel for a family wed-ding. Moishy had told my Hatzalahcoordinator he would be able to pickme up from Greece on a medical trans-port, if the need arose. I called Moishyto see if I could take him up on his of-fer, if necessary. He said yes and hehad better connections to Benny Fish-er than the ones I had. He offered tocall Benny himself. Since we hadn’theard back from Benny yet I toldMoishy to go for it. Benny had re-quested a copy of my medical recordsto show the doctors at EL-AL, but Isaid they were all in Greek. Moishyasked me to call Benny myself, whichI did and finally spoke to him a fewhours later. I explained that the recordswere in Greek and I had no way oftranslating them. I don’t remember if



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Benny suggested, my attending sug-gested, or if I did, but a suggestion wasmade that the Greek attending write asummary of my condition/care in Eng-lish, which she did. We got the clear-ance to fly from EL-Al as long asMoishy came along as medical escort.

Things were moving right alongand we were starting to feel a littlemore confident. We’re not sure why,but for some reason my father askedthe lady at the embassy if there wasanything else that might prevent usfrom leaving the country. She men-tioned the hospital bill. Greek law pre-vents the hospital from calculating thebill, or even asking us for any financialinformation, until discharge. She alsomentioned that at times they have hada passport control lock on patients(who didn’t pay their bill) from leav-ing the country. Oxford (my insurancecompany) told me I would have to payout of pocket, and when I got back Iwould need to have the records trans-lated. They would then reimburse meat regular customary rates. I was toldby the Embassy that the hospital, apublic one, was not allowed to takehealth insurance by Greek law. I wouldhave to pay the bill in full and thensubmit it to my insurance for reim-bursement. Also, a public hospital can-not take credit cards. So, now what? Iasked Moishy if Benny had any sug-gestions and he said there was nothinghe could do on that front. I spoke to theattending physician who told me thatthe whole stay shouldn’t be muchmore than 1500 Euro. I thought I washearing things. In the States this wouldbe about $100,000. My parents hadcontacted Western Union and foundout we could wire my brother the mon-ey as soon as we had the figure. TheEmbassy woman volunteered to talk tothe financial office first thing in themorning to get a ball-park figure so wewould know how much to transfer. Shetried but was politely told to jump in alake based on Greek law. Finally, at11:30, the discharge papers were readyand authorization to figure out the billcame. The bill came out to just under1770 Euro, which my parents immedi-ately wired. There were a few tensemoments when my brother had issueswith Western Union but finally we gotthe money. I was given a copy of my



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chart, paid the bill, and I was free! I was trying to decide ifBaruch Rofeh Cholim or Baruch Matir Asurim was moreappropriate.

The Chabad rabbi drove us to the hotel by the hospitalwhere my brother had been staying, and he checked out. Wethen drove to the part of town where the Chabad House wasand checked into a hotel a few blocks away. WOW… real airconditioning and a SHOWER! My brother had a bottle ofTide and clean sweat pants he was able to find, and I wasable to clean my smelly clothing. After a nice supper, andmincha/maariv at the Chabad House, we retired for the night(in a nice comfy bed). First thing in the morning we davenedand took a cab to the airport. At the airport everyone wasvery nice and helpful. The EL-AL manager said that if theyhad any empty seats in business class they would upgrade usfor free. When the flight from Israel arrived, Moishy was thelast one off the plane, but we found each other right awayand had an uneventful flight back to Israel.

Viewing things from the other side of the stretcher hasbeen a real eye-opening experience for me. The Hatzalahdoctor mentioned that the quality of medical care I receivedin Greece was outstanding, and I likely wouldn’t have got-ten better care in a New York hospital. I owe a tremendousdebt of gratitude to Hashem, as well as all people who havebent over backwards to help me. As I mentioned earlier, MiK’amcha Yisroel!

The following is an excerpt from an email sent to us by“The Israeli Woman” in Greece, which we received a fewdays after we arrived in Israel. I have nothing to add.

“What else but the hand of G-d defines our world andeach moment of our lives? We’re always aware of it, butrarely find ourselves in a compact situation where it is soplainly revealed to us.

The unplanned landing just a few minutes prior toMeir’s distress that probably saved his life, my daughter’swish for a larger-than-usual watermelon that led me tospend more time looking for it at the market, the flat wheelthat surprised me and forced me to change my route, theimpeccably precise split second when Chaim stepped ontothe pavement where I could see his yarmulke under thebright sun while I was waiting for the traffic light to switchto green, and all this occurring on a Friday, which is ahighly unusual day to have off for a working person inGreece.

Seldom does the best orchestra respond so swiftly andin unison to its conductor as it did on that short-of-miracu-lous Friday morning.

Probably because twice in my life I experienced livingin a country wherein I didn’t speak the language, I felt thesheer necessity of making it easier for Avromi and Chaim.There was little I could do initially for Meir, but then camethe truly enlightening moment when I realized I should sug-gest to the Greek cardiologist, Dr. Kitsiou, to get in touchwith Meir’s doctor in Queens via email or Skype. I call it en-lightened, because it could only be inspired by G-d’s infinitewisdom.

An additional moment of G-d’s grace was when I re-called that there’s a custom of smelling spices at havdalaand, although we don’t do the havdala at home, there it was



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in my kitchen, as if waiting for Avromiand Chaim: a bundle of freshspearmint and dry oregano.

I’ve become aware of possible an-ti-Israeli/anti-Semitic attitudes insome parts of the Greek population. Itis not just the uneducated people (un-fortunately, some medical profession-als, lawyers, etc., are among them) inGreece who blame Jews/Israelis forthe financial issues in the world, in-cluding those in Greece. Taking intoconsideration that a neo-Nazi politicalparty is currently unconstrained, I de-cided to over-protect Avromi andChaim. I asked them to wear baseballcaps and to be accompanied by mewhile walking to and from the hospitalon Shabbat. I understand that it addedmore inconvenience to their alreadystressful situation, but I still believe itwas necessary.

It feels a little awkward to admitthis, but the short time that I could beof help to Avromi, Chaim, and Meir intheir stressful situation turned out to bea true blessing for me. It reminded meof a song from the musical “Fiddler onthe Roof,” in which Tevye wonderswhat he would have done were he arich man. He envisions a big housewith squawking geese and chicks inthe yard while important men ask forhis advice just because he is wealthy,and yet, the sweetest thing of all wouldhave been for him to have a seat by theEastern wall and discuss the holybooks several hours a day with learnedmen. During these couple of days Iwas granted a precious gift of thissweetest thing that Tevye could onlydream of. Although I do attend talksand follow YouTube lectures on bothsecular and religious subjects, it was aprecious occasion to enjoy an interac-tive conversation with kind, wise, andlearned people.

In addition to wishing Refua Shle-ma to Meir (please keep me posted re-garding his recuperation), I’d like toborrow the blessing of Rabbi YitzchakGinsburgh and to forward it to you,your families, and your friends: ‘Mayyou be blessed with a great, sweet yearin all things, material and spiritual, asone. May your lives be filled withgoodness and benevolence, the kind ofgood that is revealed and obvious.’

Amein!”

SPECIAL REDUCED PRICE!SPECIAL REDUCED PRICE!SPECIAL REDUCED PRICE!

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a girl to a boy and vice versa.I was in bed reading the Sefer Toras Avra-

ham, from my Zeidy’s brother-in-law, Reb Avra-ham Grodzinski. He was discussing the bracha -“Thank you Hashem for not making me a goy.”

He asked, “How can one think that a goyis something negative? After all, a whole worldwas created for a goy named Adam HaRishon!”

So Reb Avraham answered, “No, a goy isGREAT. But we thank Hashem for making usJews, which is even greater.”

Right there, I called out to Reb Avrahamand I declared, “The Nazis killed you and yetyou praise the goy. Reb Avraham, be a meilitzyosher that my baby should be a boy and I’llgive him YOUR NAME!”

I knew that minute that I would in facthave a boy. And on a Shabbos he was born. Af-ter Shabbos I called my mother. “Mommy,you’re a grandma again, my wife had a boy.”

“What will you call him?” she asked.I told her I made a deal with her uncle Reb

Avraham Grodzinski.She said, “If you’re gonna name after a

brother-in-law of Zaidy, name him after RebShabsai Vernokovsky, who was shot into a pitwith his wife and 11 children, and no one hasused his name.

Again I told her, “Yes, but I made a dealwith Reb Avraham.”

The bris was on Shabbos and on the way,a holy Jew suggested that maybe he was born onShabbos because Reb Avraham wanted you toalso name him Shabsai.

And so I called my son Avraham Shabsai,even though my Zaidy, Reb Yaakov, was againstgiving a child two names, because he used tosay, “It’s hard enough for a person to know him-self with even one name.”

The very next day, Sunday, I met myZaidy and he said immediately, “Der nomengefelt mir!” Meaning; I like the name.

“Really?” I asked. “But I know that theZaidy is against giving two names, and espe-cially two people who were killed at a youngage.”

“No, no,” he said in Yiddish. “You canname after these kiddoshim. The Holocaust wasa GEZAIRA.”

One word – GEZAIRA. A decree fromabove.

May we ALL have a joyous Chag, withjust a little tear for our previous Purim in theCattle Car.

And a word to PM Benyamin Netanyahu,on his American trip, from Dov Shurin: “Bibi,don’t come home without Yonatan Pollard. He’sbeen in an American cattle car long enough!”[email protected]

Purim in aCattle Car

By Dov Shurin

bered what Rav Shlomo Carlebach once toldme: “Your generation, born after the war, are allincarnations of the six million!”

Now I knew I was one of them!A few weeks ago, when we read the por-

tion of the golden calf, a tzedaka collector toldme that since shishim reebo 600,000 sinned bythe golden calf, ten times that figure, 6,000,000died in the Holocaust. Now I was sure I was oneof them.

Now it was the morning of Rosh ChodeshAdar II. I led the congregation until after theShmone Esrei prayer. I was chanting out loud,with eyes closed. I was back on the cattle car.Again a child on a train, and I awoke to hear thename Haman chanted from the morning read-ing. Or was it still the reading of last night? Ididn’t know! Some people banged on the wall ofthe cattle car when Haman was mentioned. Oth-ers screamed “Hitler, yimach shemo!”

Megilla ended and people all around mewere sending Shalach Manos, a piece of bread,cake, chocolate. I was given a candy, which Iquickly tossed into my mouth.

Someone said, “Seuda!” and a holy mantook a bottle out of his bag. It was wine! Therewas one cup and a little wine was passedaround. “L’Chaim!” There were smiles thatlooked fake.

Then again I opened my eyes and I waschanting Ya’aleh V’yavo. Ribbono Shel Olam!People were wondering why I was on the vergeof tears on Rosh Chodesh Adar.

For the Hallel I gave away the Amud andtold those around me only that this was the lastday of Kaddish for my mom, trying to explainmy extra emotions.

Before my final Mincha with Kaddish, Iremembered how my holy grandfather, RebYaakov Kamenetsky, explained the Holocaust tome IN ONE WORD!

It was when my wife was pregnant withour fourth child. I was sure it was a girl thistime, but I wanted a boy. I heard that you canpray for the first 40 days, to change a child from

Last Monday, the first day of AdarII, was my last day of Kaddish formy holy mother, the oldestdaughter of my renowned grand-father, HaGaon Reb Yaakov

Kamenetsky, zt’l. It was traumatic. No moreDaddy, no more Mommy and now no moreKaddish!

During my leading the Maariv davening,with eyes closed, I was suddenly gazing arounda packed cattle car, shooting along those noisytracks.

It was packed with people, crying, moan-ing. I didn’t know where we were going. I was alittle boy. Some man caressed my head and as-sured me that everything would be ok. I didn’tknow him. I didn’t understand. It was night. Theglow of a full moon came in through a rectan-gular window, just to the left of me. Suddenlysome Rabbi pulled out a Megillas Esther fromhis bag. I didn’t realize that it was Purim night.A whole group of religious people were arguingabout something, I didn’t know what. The manwith the Megilla started screaming and wavinghis hands, refusing to agree with this sagelycharacter next to him. He got up and stuck partof his head in between the barbed wire on thetiny window.

Suddenly he shouted the bracha for theMegilla, and then the She’asah Nissim blessing.

Most people were sleeping on each other;those who were still awake were saying thingslike, “We have to hope.” All in Yiddish.

But when that man said “ShehechiyanuV’kiymanu,” someone tried to attack him andothers held him back. Some man I didn’t knowpatted my little head and whispered soothingwords.

With the stench of excrement all around,the Megilla was being read and I fell asleep.

Just then, I realized that I was davening forthe amud, and doing the Oseh Shalom. I thenchanted Kaddish Shalem. After Aleinu I said theKaddish for my mom.

Wow! What an experience! I then remem-

I S R A E L

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C O N T R O V E R S Y

TODAY’S TOPIC: List the Houses that Don’t Shovel Here

Achosid:It is outrageous that there are homes in Flatbush that STILL have not shoveled,from the very first snow storm. It is a chutzpah beyond belief, and the commu-nity needs to start exposing them. Enough is enough! How many people need toslip and break their legs? What is wrong with people? And don’t give me any ex-cuses that they may be elderly people, or the worst excuse is that they are away

on vacation. ENOUGH! EXPOSE THEM HERE!

Gamanit:My house doesn’t shovel. It just sits there looking pretty with all the snow on itand waits for me to shovel. I really have to teach my house to take over... It

would make it so much easier for me.

Golfer:Owners obviously couldn’t care less about a fellow Yid. Or a fellow human be-ing, for that matter. It might be interesting to expose them by posting theirnames, but that may not be such a good idea. I agree, though, that this unusu-al winter is bringing us (in addition to all that white, now blackish greyish brownstuff) a new insight into which of our neighbors are beneath any semblance of

mentshlichkeit.

111111:I heard from a reliable person that if snow isn’t shoveled it becomes a Borb’reshus harabim (ditch in a public thoroughfare). This then becomes an obliga-tion on every individual because the halacha is everybody has an obligation toremove a bor. So start shoveling. FYI, ask your posek but you might be able tocharge the homeowner for the cost of removal of the snow, even though the

homeowner didn’t put the snow there.

Farrockgrandma:How about a list of people who pass by a snow-covered walk where the home-

owners need help, and complain instead of lifting a finger? (or a shovel)

Popa_bar_abbaAlso, please add the locations of illegal driveways. Then, feel free to take thesnow from the unshoveled walks, and put it in front of the illegal driveways. Iheard from a prominent posek that you are allowed to call 311 on people who

don’t shovel their walk, after you warn them that you will.

HaLeiVi:If I didn’t put the snow there then it is not my Bor Bereshus Harabim. Moreover,even an actual Bor, if I made it in Reshus Harabim, it is not mine and I wouldnot be liable if not for the fact that the Torah made it as mine - concerning lia-bilities.Actually, getting rid of the snow is the city’s job. They put fines on homeownersto get them to do their job. You can’t sue a home owner who didn’t shovel hissnow, although you can sue him if he did shovel it and caused it to become slip-pery. I heard of a law professor who purposely doesn’t touch his snow. He says

it is worth the fine not to get sued.

Bustercrown:For all you complainers, how many of you can honestly say you ever thoughtabout the elderly people on your block, or the almana or divorcee who can’t doit by themselves? Did you ever think to help them?

Little Froggie:I’m not a homeowner (gasp) so I don’t know what constitutes the homeowner’sproperty. Something not on one’s property is definitely not his obligation in anyway to remove, any more than cleaning the street. The question would only beif the government makes it your responsibility, then by rote of dena demalchusa,it may become your property, to actually be mechuyav in damages (in dinTorah). And then maybe p’tur of reshus harabim won’t apply. - just thinking outloud - I leave it for the leading Rabbis and Talmudicians of the hallowed Yeshi-

va World to discuss and decide.

Ferd:I was waiting for one guy to yell “Lashon Hara.” Did YOUR wife slip and breakher leg there? Obviously not. There is a chiyuv to warn people to not walk there

to prevent them from falling.

HaLeiVi:Really!? You have to let people know where there is snow on the ground so thatthey shouldn’t walk there? Ok. Here’s my warning: If you see snow on theground, it is most likely that there is snow on the ground. Be careful. The same

goes for ice.



105

Popa_bar_abba:Why is it my job to clear the public walk in front of my home? It’s enough thatI provide it to you free of charge. How about I put bushes in it? Really, I don’tget the personal anger at the people who don’t shovel the sidewalk in front oftheir house. So the city has a law stating that you need to have a sidewalk there,and you need to keep it clear. Well, that’s for the city to enforce, at its choice.The fact that you as a pedestrian get some third party benefit from the city’s re-quirements has nothing to do with us. You don’t like the snow - you shovel it.

N.G:Maybe these people are too old to shovel. If they are they should hire a kid to

do it. My son made $400 shoveling.

Imamom:I’m from out of town, but had occasion to be in Flatbush recently, after a bigsnow. Due to the poor shoveling habits, it was exceedingly difficult to find aplace to park. I was driving a rental and did not want to skid into somebodyelse’s car. I finally did find a spot, creatively parking on top of a snow mountain,but blocking a driveway. The driveway was not shoveled, and did not appear tobe an active driveway, judging by the amount of old snow in front of the driveand the sidewalk. In the morning, I came out and found a note, berating me forthe chutzpah of blocking their driveway. Seriously? If you wanted to use yourdriveway, then how about shoveling the driveway and the snow in front of thedriveway, including the sidewalk as a “siman” that it is an active driveway. Andmaybe you and your “kind” neighbors could find it in your heart to shovel yourwalks and your parking spots, too. You never know, the broken limb and/or the

property damage that you prevent may just be your own!

Zahavasdad:I am amazed at how machmir people are about mitzvos bein adam laMakom,but how lax they are about bein adam lachavero. It’s amazing how someone canwear Rabbenu Tam Teffilin but not care that their neighbor might fall and break

a bone on the snow and ice.

Syag Lchochma:I grew up two doors away from a shul. A Rebbe/teacher of my brother livedone block from the shul in the other direction. Every snow, my brother shoveledstraight from our house to his Rebbe’s. My neighbor snow blows the walk of anelderly lady down the street and does the whole sidewalk in between (as a fa-vor, not just to pass through). When we and our neighbors shovel, if the otherhasn’t, we do each other’s walks. It’s your choice to be a stickler for the letter

of the law, or to be a mentsch.

Abcd2:Dear members, I know one of the homeowners you’re referring to. The personbecame an ALMANA this year. Yesterday her thirteen year old son was choppingthe ice like crazy, even near where the street was and I could not understandwhy but now I realize. I think he even took a break from Yeshiva. This is ourfault as a community. Someone should have volunteered to help her son who is

still at home.

Fallen:For the record, I fell on the ice and snow because someone didn’t shovel. Icouldn’t walk for a week, I couldn’t even get up the stairs in my house and hadto sleep on a chair. I then limped for a month and people who know me said mywalking has changed since the fall. Several rabbis who know me were original-ly against shoveling snow on Shabbos. But when they saw what happened to methey changed their opinion because of it and they realized that the whole issue

of Sakana is not a theoretical issue and people really can get hurt.

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• Keep up with your journal, anduse the notes section to documentyour mood, setting, and activitywhenever you feel the urge to eatsweets. Review your notes, andlook for patterns or triggers thatyou can alter to help control yoursugar intake.

• Select one temptation to work oneach week. Try satisfying yoursweet tooth with a snack-sizedcandy bar instead of a full-sizedone. Next week, trade in a softdrink for seltzer with a splash offruit juice.

• Satisfy your desire for sweetswith the natural sweetness ofwhole fruits or juices with no sug-ar added.

• Buy unsweetened food and bever-ages, and add small amounts ofsweeteners if you need them. En-joy whole-grain cereal with oneteaspoon of sugar (if you must)instead of presweetened cereals,which contain much more sugarper serving.

• Try using less sugar in your coffee

or tea. Gradually decrease theamount you use to let your tastebuds adapt.

• Don’t substitute artificial sweet-eners for sugar; this will do littleto alter your desire for sweets.Moderate amounts of artificialsweeteners may not be unhealthy,but they won’t help you retrainyour taste buds.

• Abstinence makes the heart growfonder - and it also intensifiescravings. Allow yourself smallportions of sweets on occasion.Try to satisfy your cravings with apiece of hard candy or sugarlessgum. If you totally deny yourself,it will be hard to think about any-thing else. On the other hand, ifyou know you are allowed onesmall treat per day, you will savorevery bite.

• Quench your thirst with flavoredwaters that are calorie-free. Jazzup plain or sparkling water withfresh mint, a slice of lemon, lime,or orange, or a splash of fruit juice.If you’re a sugar “addict,” kicking

the habit will do your body good. The

American Heart Association’s newestrecommendations suggest a balanced di-et, low in fat, with a reduced sugar intake,along with regular exercise, as the bestway to lose weight and keep it off!

As a certified nutritionist and fit-ness trainer, Rochelle’s unique ap-proach to weight management com-bines diet, exercise and behavior mod-ification in a warm, understanding,and relaxed environment. Recognizingthat people gain weight for differentreasons, she tailors personalized nu-tritional and fitness plans suitable tothe individual. She educates her clientson the importance of eating healthyand regular physical activity, andworks with each client on a personallevel towards effective solutions for at-taining a healthy lifestyle.

Rochelle’s practice is an innova-tive blend of nutrition, health, and fit-ness, with her sincere personality andintegrity, using proven methods thataddress the multi-faceted needs of ourcommunity. For more information onthis vital health issue, contact RochelleCSPN, CFT, at 718.438.1632.

How Sweet… Cont. From Page 83

108

Country Yossi Family Magazine MARCH 2014

109

BALABUSTE'S CHOICE 2

MOUNTAIN FAMILYTZIREL RUS BERGER, PNINA NEIMAN - ARTSCROLL

MY FATHER, MY MOTHER AND ME

YEHUDIS SAMET - ARTSCROLL

LET MY NATION LIVE

YOSEF DEUTSCH - ARTSCROLL

THEN THERE WAS CAKE

HEBREW ACADEMY OF MONTREAL

A GLIMPSE OF LIGHT

DR. J. SCHAMROTH - TARGUM PRESS

THE RABBI AND THE NUNS

RABBI DR. ABRAHAM J. TWERSKI - TARGUM PRESS

A DIVINE MADNESSRABBI AVIGDOR MILLER ZT'L

THE QUEEN YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW

RABBI DAVID FOHRMAN - ORTHODOX UNION

WISDOM IN THE HEBREW MONTHS VOL. 2

ZVI RYZMAN - ARTSCROLL



110

PROLOGUE

The armed guard leaned over to peerinto the official limousine. He was com-pletely covered by an orange protectivesuit. Only his eyes were visible throughthe lenses of his rubber goggles as hecarefully studied the car’s occupants.

In the front seat sat the Israeli primeminister’s regular driver, with an internalsecurity bodyguard next to him. Behindthem was the prime minister, squeezed inbeside his military adjutant, his personalsecretary, the minister of security, and an-other bodyguard - as if anyone who wasable to cram into the limo in the primeminister’s parking lot had done so.

The guard did not need to consultthe list in his hand. All the passengerswere known to him and were authorizedto enter. At the wave of his arm, someonein a remote inspection booth pressed abutton, and the heavy steel gates slidback with surprising speed. The limou-sine started forward with a screech of itstires and entered an inner area enclosedby concrete walls, wire fences, andwatchtowers.

Inside, pandemonium reigned.Dozens of soldiers in gas masks raced toand fro across the wide asphalt expanse.Several of them darted toward the primeminister’s car, yanked open the doors,and hustled its passengers through a doorin a concrete wall built into the slope ofthe hill.

At that moment, two army vehiclesentered through the main gate, disgorg-ing in quick succession the head of mili-tary intelligence and four generals, alongwith the interior minister, who had beenin the midst of conducting an official in-spection of a central army base thatmorning. On the landing strip at the en-closure’s perimeter, the Army chief ofstaff’s helicopter made a noisy landing.Crouching, he ran from the helicopter,flanked by two aides and the head of theGeneral Security Service (G.S.S.). Everyface registered alarm, as though cog-nizant of the severity of the situation.

“Run! Run!” young soldiers urgedtheir illustrious charges. “Hurry! Faster!”

But there was no need to hasten any-one along. Of their own accord, everyonesped toward a door that led into a squareroom that housed numerous examinationcubicles. In each cubicle, an army para-medic in full protective gear quicklydrew a blood sample from each newcom-er’s arm. Within seconds, the color greenappeared in the tiny window at the top ofeach syringe. The medic bent the needleinto a hook, inserted the syringe into thesubject’s lapel, and directed him to therow of elevators waiting to take them un-derground.

Suddenly, a cry slashed through themuted din in the big room: “Red!”

Instant silence fell. A few headsturned back for a moment. The corpulenttreasury minister stood there, staring withbulging eyes at his syringe. The tiny win-dow was colored red. Those standing

nearby began to inch way, forming anever-widening circle around him.

The portly man in the expensive suitgrew very pale. He knew what that redindicator meant. Beads of perspirationformed on his forehead and his shouldersslumped in despair. His helpless gazeswept the crowd until it fell on the primeminister. He spread his hands in a mutegesture of appeal. But not even the strongbonds of friendship between the two men- a bond going back many years - or theirlongstanding political ties could help himnow. Painfully, the prime minister turnedaway and continued walking toward theelevator.

“Sir,” the installation’s supervisorcalled to the treasury minister, “you arerequested to leave this area at once.”

Two armed soldiers stepped up tocarry out the order. Cabinet ministers andarmy generals watched the unfortunateman’s back as he was led outside to thecontaminated area - and to a world thatappeared to be crumbling.

The Situation Room of the nation-al strategy center, six flights below theentry hall built into the side of the hill,was spartan: bare concrete walls snakedwith electrical cables, cold fluorescentlights, and a large, bare table in the cen-ter. This was the beating heart of thehuge bunker - a small city beneath theearth built to afford protection againstevery form of weaponry. It was a con-trol center capable of activating allarmy, security, health, and financialsystems throughout the land. At the

On a cool mountaintop in Tzefas, an American professional turns to his Rebbe and asksfor his help.

And for protection.For someone is after Dr. Jacob Stern. Someone without pity. Someone willing to do

anything, absolutely anything, to hide a terrible secret.Chaim Greenbaum, who captivated tens of thousands of readers with The Will, once

again brings together an unforgettable cast of characters, linked by a plot that has itsroots in a heinous crime that took place decades earlier. A pale, colorless man with apenchant for mayhem; a group of hidden tzaddikim; a CIA official gone rogue; a youngYerushalmi bride; a Mexican anthropologist; a Texas rancher; a Torah-observant seniorofficial in the U.S. Department of Agriculture - and an aging rebbe whose spiritual vi-sion seems to grow stronger as his physical powers fade and the future of his dynasty

is at stake - all come together in a story that astonishes and fascinates the reader.From its first breathtaking scene to its final startling conclusion, The Mexico File is a tale of faith and

betrayal; the story of a global battle between the forces of good and evil - and of the many innocent people caughtin its crossfire.

BOOK EXCERPT

Reprinted and excerpted with permission ofShaar Press © 2014.



111

head of the table sat the prime minister,the chief of staff, the inspector generalof the police, and the head of theG.S.S., with the remaining ministersand high government officials takingtheir places in descending order.

On the other side of the big room, agroup of soldiers from Army Communi-cations stood by to link the SituationRoom of the State of Israel to the outsideworld - or what was left of it.

A row of oversized screens project-ed live broadcasts from the central newsnetworks. Those in the room watched thescreens with undisguised horror. A CNNbroadcaster in a gas mask faced the cam-era, reporting live from a dying NewYork. Nor was the view from the BBC inLondon any more encouraging. Thebroadcaster for the Russian network burstinto tears on camera.

The people seated around the tablegazed at each other in shock. It trulylooked like the end of the world. Utter ca-tastrophe. Chaos…

The prime minister nodded at hismilitary adjutant, Lieutenant Colonel UriArbel, who stood up and began to speak.

“Well, the situation, as you see, isvery bad. The east coast of the UnitedStates has been completely affected, andthe epidemic is spreading westward toPittsburgh, Cleveland, and Chicago. Thedeath toll exceeded the million markwithin a week, there are three millionmore who are ill, and none of the expertscan estimate how many carriers are con-tinuing to spread the plague without theirknowledge. Huge areas have turned intomass graves. In New Jersey, parking lotshave been turned into cemeteries, andPhiladelphia is no longer bothering tobury its dead: They are simply burningthem in huge pyres outside the city lim-its. The entire American economy hasground to a halt. Banks are closed, thestock market’s crashed, and there is noone supplying food or medicine. The po-lice and emergency services have col-lapsed. Stores are being looted and thereis no one to put a stop to it.”

“What about Washington?” the for-eign minister asked.

The military officer compressed hislips gloomily. “The Americans tried tohalt the plague by creating a 50-kilome-ter-wide ‘clean band’ around the capital.But the effort was futile. By this morn-ing, some 2,000 people have died in

Washington and the source of the out-break has been traced to an office build-ing near the Pentagon. Two White Houseemployees have already been infected. Itis very probable that we are facing - howcan I put this? - a leadership crisis in theUnited States.”

The prime minister heaved a deepsigh and sank back in his chair. The mapof the United States, on the largestscreen, was replaced by a map of Russia.

“The second focal point in the out-break is in Central Asia,” Uri Arbel con-tinued. “The epidemic broke out in the

city of Semipalotinsk, in northeast Khaz-akstan, ten days ago. We have no detailsabout what is happening in Russia’s ruraldistricts, but within several days it hadspread quickly northward, leaving wholeareas strewn with what are estimated tobe about 300,000 dead. Life in Russiahas become completely paralyzed. Peo-ple are remaining in their homes, afraidof becoming infected. There is no medi-cine, and the plague is continuing to ex-act its toll. Russia’s president, as youknow, died this morning. Moscow lookslike a ghost town.”



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t was almost time for Shabbos.There were a number of

things I still needed to do, but itwas hard for me to stop readingthe stories that were just then

being collected about Rabbi MeirSchuster, who, in his late sixties, hadbecome very ill with a degenerative ill-ness known as Lewy Body Disease,which combines the symptoms of bothAlzheimer’s and Parkinson’s Disease.The stories collected are all about whatReb Meir did with his own life, and themany, many lives that he helped trans-form. An intensity in my heart wasbuilding with each word I read, and Iwas transported back, over thirty yearsago.

It is 1976. The man who was tobecome my husband was praying atthe Kotel. Larry had finished his timein a kibbutz ulpan, and was still volun-teering in a development town in theNegev, when he decided to spend theweekend in Jerusalem. He was sched-uled to return to the States a few weekslater, with no clear plans. Larry put anote in a crevice in the Wall and thenprayed sincerely to find his path in life.When he finished, there was a tap onhis shoulder. It was Rabbi Schuster,asking him, “Do you have the time?”Thank G-d, Larry did have the time,and he followed Reb Meir to a yeshivafor baalei teshuva where he began theprocess of finding his life’s path. Afternine years of learning and teaching atYeshiva Aish HaTorah, young wander-ing Larry became Rabbi Aryeh Goetz.

It is 1978, and after completingmy first year of medical school, I was

volunteering on the oncology ward atHadassah Hospital, visiting with pa-tients who were dying, while my secretmission was to learn the purpose ofliving. During my first few days in Is-rael, I went to the Kotel, and Reb MeirSchuster found me there. His purityand his sincerity came right into myheart. I began to study with RebbetzinDenah Weinberg, and at the women’sdivision of Ohr Someyach, as theprocess of understanding the purposeof living began for me as well.

It is 1979, and every torch is lit onthe Menorah beside the Kotel, as it isthe eighth night of Chanukah. Mysoon-to-be husband is sitting near meon a bench in the Kotel plaza. He tellsme that on the eighth day ofChanukah, the spiritual potential fordedication is at its greatest. He wantsto know if on this night full of the pow-er of dedication, I will agree to be hispartner in life, so we can continue ourseparate journeys together.

Reb Meir is there, too, on thenight when my husband asked me tomarry him. We both see him at thesame moment. He is looking for moreand more lost neshamos, waiting to befound, including those who, like us,will be blessed to find each other too.

Reb Meir has been with us eversince, as well, helping us raise ourchildren to strive for the simple puritythat he offered both of us. From ouroldest son who has opened the YeshivaHigh School of Arizona, to ouryoungest daughter, who was amadricha in the Heritage House thatReb Meir established, Reb Meir’s pure

idealism has gotten infused into ourchildren’s lives. His gentle tap haseven come to be felt by all the grand-children that have also now blessedour lives, thank G-d.

And we were only two of the tensof thousands of neshamos that RebMeir helped lead to the spiritual well-springs craved. The ripples spreadingout from all the neshamos he effected,are not possible to count. Not in thisworld. The reach of this one humbleman is endless.

From what I learned from readingabout Reb Meir, his parents were sur-vivors of the Holocaust from Poland,and they were not observant, althoughReb Meir’s grandmother still was.Stanley, as he was known then, wasbrought up in Milwaukee, Wisconsin,and attended public school there.When Rabbi Abraham Yehoshua Twer-ski opened a Talmud Torah in Milwau-kee, through his bubbie’s gentle urg-ing, her grandson, Meir Tzvi, known toeveryone else as Stanley Schuster, be-came one of its first students. RabbiTwerski was devoted to being mekarevReb Meir, and he helped young MeirSchuster catch up in his Hebrew stud-ies.

Rabbi Twerski recalled RebMeir’s tremendous thirst for learningabout Judaism, and he said that heused to daven and bentch with suchtremendous fervor, soon after helearned how, that it inspired all aroundhim. He remembered when ‘Stanley,’at the age of 14, with his parents’ con-sent, went off to learn in yeshiva inSkokie, Illinois. He had already be-come a masmid (very devoted Torahlearner) and from there, he went on tolearn in Yeshiva Ner Israel in Balti-more, Maryland, where he studied forseven years, and got semicha.

At Ner Israel, he was known forbeing an extremely dedicated studentand for doing a semi-speech fast onShabbos, only speaking words ofTorah. According to his friends, RebMeir was an excellent listener, but avery quiet person who spoke very lit-tle, not wanting to speak one superflu-ous word. He was just about the lastperson any of them would have imag-ined going into the field of kiruv.

Reb Meir was always on the look-out for ways to do chesed and help oth-

P E O P L E

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ers, and always with his great big,warm smile. Reb Meir also took on ajob that was definitely not sought after,of going around to wake his fellow stu-dents. He would faithfully walkthrough the dorms every morning,calling in Yiddish repeatedly and withsuch pure earnestness, “Wake up,Wake up - it’s time to serve Hashem.”

After Reb Meir got married, heand his wife, Esther, moved to EretzYisroel in 1968. They came with twosuitcases, and intended to stay for ayear, while Reb Meir learned in theMir Yeshiva. He never went back toAmerica until many years later, afterhe had established the Heritage House,and needed to raise funds for it. (Nowonder he was able to encourage thou-sands of others to stay in Eretz Yisroellonger too!)

Reb Chaim Kass, a good friend ofReb Meir’s, who now runs two healthfood stores in Lakewood, NJ, said thatone day he was learning with Reb Meirthe story of how the Netziv of Volozhinrealized that he wasn’t reaching histrue greatness and how he struggled tobe granted the siyata d’Shmaya (Di-vine assistance) to fulfill his potential.Reb Chaim said that this story resonat-ed very deeply with Reb Meir.

The next day they were daveningtogether at the Kotel and they watchedpeople going to the Wall and being litup by the experience. And the thoughtstruck both of them at the same time:“Why can’t someone connect withthese people and bring them closer toyiddishkeit?” And then they both no-ticed this one young fellow with abackpack on. He was leaning againstthe wall and crying. They watched ashe composed himself, and startedwalking away from his holy encounter.That was the moment of epiphanywhen they both realized that this fel-low had nowhere to go with the feel-ings that had just emerged. Reb Chaimwalked over to him and said, “Hi, I’mChaim Kass - I hope we are not both-ering you, but it looks like somethinghappened for you there. Can we intro-duce you to some real Judaism?” Thisyoung man’s reaction was one of ap-preciation, and they introduced him toa rabbi with whom he could learn.

Both Reb Chaim and Reb Meirwere captivated by this experience and

they started going back every after-noon during their breaks from yeshivato speak with more young men. Theyconnected with about 15 young men inthe first two weeks, bringing someback to Reb Meir’s house for a Shab-bos seuda. At first it was Reb Chaimdoing the talking, but then Reb Meirstarted taking over. He started doing it,and he began to do it very well, as ifthis was natural for him. After thosetwo weeks, Reb Meir took over com-pletely, and he continued doing this forthe next 40 years. Day in, day out, feel-

ing sick, with a sprained ankle, in thehottest weather and the coldest, in therain and in the snow, as a pure chesed,receiving no monetary payment, hewas there. Being soaking wet for hourswas of no importance to Reb Meir be-cause he was searching with the ut-most determination for any neshamoshe could possibly tap that were ripe forfinding fulfillment.

As one of the neshamos he dis-covered put it, “and he did all this for40 years - not with a silver tongue - butby being real. And ‘real’ trumps a sil-



114

ver tongue every time.” People thinkthey need to be a charismatic charmerto be successful at reaching people, butit was Reb Meir’s pure earnestness thatfound its way into another’s heart gen-tly and directly. Reb Meir would typi-cally ask both men and women if theywanted to attend a class or come for aShabbos meal. He would often wait af-ter class for the person or come backthe next day to get his feedback. Hewould travel on several buses to helpsomeone collect their things so that itwould be easier for her to return formore studies. He would remain intouch with as many individuals he metthat he could, sending cards of encour-agement that managed to make majorimpacts - even thousands of milesaway. As one who was ‘pursued’ byReb Meir for years and years said, “Noone cared more deeply about a soulthan Reb Meir Schuster.”

Reb Meir, in a way, brings tomind Moshe Rabeinu, who was deter-mined to overcome his most glaringweakness of being a shy and awkwardspeaker in order to fulfill his role forthe Jewish people. His wife said thatReb Meir’s most over-ridingcharacteristic was his unwa-vering belief in siyata d’Sh-maya - the unimaginable as-sistance that is possible fromthe Soul of Souls. She sawhow her husband wentagainst all odds to do what hedid. Rav Noach Weinberg, ofblessed memory, agreed, say-ing that if Reb Meir could dokiruv, then anyone - no mat-ter how shy or reserved theyare - could do kiruv. As such,he was a model that inspireda generation of others whodidn’t think they had ‘theright stuff’ to pursue kiruv.

Rebetzin Schuster alsosaid “When he decided to dosomething, he did it ‘ad ha-sof.’ He wouldn’t give up un-til the end. When he wasbarely able to even walk any-more, he still wanted to go toEngland to raise funds for theHeritage House. He is a realfighter. Nothing could standin his way because every ac-tion he did, he did l’shem

Shomyaim (for a Divine purpose). Andhe never got involved in any kind ofpolitics.”

The souls who descend into thisworld spend most of their time onearth being distracted from their truepurpose by getting pulled down by theconcerns of this physical and transientworld. Reb Meir tried valiantly to nev-er get distracted from his true purpose,and his wife got to witness this eachsingularly precious day, for 43 years.She said that as the disease beganstealing away his ability to think andremember and communicate, he re-doubled his efforts in learning - sittingwith a Gemara in his hands 8-10 hoursa day, every day.

In the 1980’s, seeing that therewere only youth hostels run byMoslems or Christians in the Old City,Reb Meir became determined to createa Jewish youth hostel where youngJewish men and women could stay andlearn about Judaism in a warm and re-laxed atmosphere. If they didn’t wantto go to a yeshiva. This unlikely speak-er then became a fundraiser, establish-ing the men’s and women’s Heritage

House, and traveling around the worldfor three months a year collectingfunds - when he wasn’t collecting Jew-ish people at the Wall, to gather themin closer. In its busiest years so far,5,000 people a year got the chance toabsorb the warm Jewish welcome thatcan still be found in a Heritage Houseexperience.

Rabbi Avraham Edelstein, whoworked with Reb Meir for over twentyyears, expressed that, “There was nev-er any letup in Rabbi Schuster’s burn-ing intensity. Nothing could be left fortomorrow. ‘We have to do this rightaway,’ was one of his most repeatedstatements. The needs of Klal Yisraelwere urgent - nothing could wait untiltomorrow. And he sincerely felt thateven this was not enough. I rememberReb Meir saying to me after two YomKippurs that he had done teshuva onthe fact that he had not done enough,and that this year he was determined todo more. And then he would look atme with those intense eyes as if to say,‘Nu, what are we waiting for. Let’s getcracking.’

One day, during the Second Intifa-da, in 2000, when terroristattacks were on the rise andtourism dropped off substan-tially, Reb Meir came barg-ing into my office. ‘TheAmericans are not coming,’he blurted out. ‘We have todeal with Israelis.’ I looked athim in astonishment. ‘RebMeir,’ I tried to gently ex-plain, ‘You are not Israeli. Iam not Israeli. We don’t un-derstand their mentality. Webarely speak Hebrew.’ Try toexplain to Reb Meir that heshouldn’t do something. To-day, the Shorashim HeritageCenters, first located directlyunder the Heritage House,have branches in several lo-cations throughout Eretz Yis-roel. About 1,000 Israelisevery week come to hearclasses, because Reb Meirjust wouldn’t let up. 50,000young Israelis have alreadycome to one of theShorashim Heritage Centers.

But it wasn’t just his in-tense determination that



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drove his success. This man had a coating of Siyata D’Sh-maya that hovered over his every move. Once, Rabbi SenderChochomovitch, the Rosh Yeshiva of Binyan Olam, an or-ganization for South Americans of significant scope, enteredinto negotiations with us to open up a hostel for Spanishspeakers. ‘Why do you need us?’ I asked Rabbi Cho-chomovitch. ‘I need you,’ he said, ‘because I want to tap in-to Reb Meir’s Siyata D’Shmaya.’

There were so many instances when this Siyata D’Sh-maya was obvious. Once, there were two young SouthAfricans who hung around the hotels for a few weeks beforetaking off to other countries. Six months later, one of themwalked into my office. ‘I am learning in Aish HaTorah now,’he proudly announced. And then he told me the followingstory: ‘I went to Egypt and I was watching TV. The issuewas about Israel and they showed a scene from the Wall.And there, standing in front of the Wall, was Rabbi Schus-ter. So I fled to Turkey. But in Turkey the same thing hap-pened.’ He proceeded to relate how he finally reached Spain,and was waiting at the bus station in Madrid to take him fur-ther afield. He had a few hours to spare and he started re-flecting on the messages via TV he had received from Rab-bi Schuster. He never took that bus. He went to the airport,flew to Israel and entered yeshivah.”

When a person spends time in the presence of someonewho is very knowledgeable in any field, he does not becomeany more knowledgeable about the subject. When one is giv-en the chance to simply be in the presence of a great baalemunah, however, one’s soul suddenly becomes infusedwith a greater emunah. That’s how one individual - RebMeir - directly affected the lives of probably more than onehundred thousand people. Rabbi Michel Twerski describesReb Meir as “an unpretentious, self-effacing legend of ourtime. A rare figure of history who touched so many livesthrough his profound authenticity.” And he could have caredless about any recognition for himself.

Reb Meir and his wife had three children, two daugh-ters and a son. They lost one daughter years ago when shewas killed by an Arab driver backing up a truck. He kept onfulfilling his mission, unwavering in his emunah. A fewyears ago, in his mid-sixties, while still going strong andwith many more goals that he hoped to pursue, Reb Meir be-gan to develop Lewy Body Disease. He could no longer bethe man beside the beloved Wall. He soon required full-timecare from his devoted wife and daughter at home, and thenReb Meir moved into a nursing home facility where his wifespent her days with him.

My daughter, Shira, who worked at the Heritage House,told me that when she was blessed to get to see Reb Meir afew years ago, he was still able to get around, with assis-tance at that time, but the Alzheimer’s-like symptoms of hisdisease had already progressed to the point where he seemedto be unable to remember or speak. Reb Meir still only want-ed to be of help, however, if it was at all possible, as he triedmightily, and repeatedly, to remain useful in any way hecould. He was even trying to help my daughter lift the bigbag of laundry that she was loading into a machine. What hestill remembered was that he just wanted to be able to give.And my daughter said that what he also still had was his



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same warm ‘biggest smile in the wholeworld.’

It was getting late. I needed to pullmyself away and stop reading the sto-ries that were just then beginning toemerge about Reb Meir.

I hurried into the kitchen and sawmy husband, almost ready to leave forshul. Through eyes getting blurry withthe tears I was trying to hold in, I askedhim, “How could this be happening toReb Meir? How could it be? The pureemunah we absorbed from him, meet-ing such an emesdik person as him,

made it possible for us. And eventhough we were disillusioned later onby people not observing the Torah in anauthentic way, it’s the inspiration ofReb Meir’s initial purity and humilitythat left the greatest imprint on us.That’s what kept us going. This hum-ble, gentle soul. How could this be hap-pening to him now? How can it be?”

I searched in the eyes of the manwho became my husband and who hasshared this amazing journey throughlife with me, and suddenly there wasan answer that over thirty years of a

widening perspective has made possi-ble.

“Oh, now I see!” I gasped to myhusband. “Reb Meir, who didn’t careabout wealth, power, or prestige, andwho devoted his life to the simplestform of kiruv, is now able to deliver themost penetrating kiruv message of all -through this rare illness that took overnot only his body, but also his mind.Unable to speak, Reb Meir’s messagewas not wavering. It is still able to en-ter our hearts. How can it be that suchgoodness, with such earnestness likeReb Meir’s and his devoted family,could have this be the end result of allof those selfless decades of effort?How can it be? It can’t be the end!”

Reb Meir is leading us to see -perhaps clearer than ever - that thisshort life we have on earth cannot pos-sibly be all there is. There has got to beinfinitely more, in the invisible spiritu-al realm that our physical eyes can’tsee, but our souls know. Reb Meir,even while so ill, was still re-directingus to the deepest and purest emes.

It was almost time for Shabbos.The Shabbos that so many might havenever known if not for him.

A taste of the World-to-Come.“Do you have the time?” he asked

us simply. Thank G-d, we all did, andwe still do. He is no longer able towalk back and forth at the Kotel,searching for our neshamos, day andnight. But he is still able to show us theway to go in life.

What just one person can do onthis Earth, he has demonstrated. Andliterally or figuratively, we all gottapped by the man with a mission.

Reb Meir showed us how to tapinto our own inner invincible spark, sothat we could continue to brighten theworld with illumination.

It’s time to light.

Bracha Goetz is the author of 24 Jew-ish children’s books, including ‘Let’sStay Safe, Let’s Stay Pure’ and ‘TheInvisible Book.’If you would like to make a donation tothe Heritage House in memory of RebMeir, here is the site.h t tp: / /www.cross-currents .com/archives/2014/02/17/rav-meir-schus-t e r - t h e - m a n - a t - t h e - w a l l - z l /#ixzz2uHR0lXwK

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IMPORTANT NOTEThese ratings are sup-

plied by the 7 major Jewishmusic outlets listed here,based on their actual salesover the last thirty days in theGreater New York area.

The list does not reflecttotal sales of any CD. It doesnot include sales in otherstores, cities or countries (Is-rael!).

The list is designed to bean indication of what’s cur-rently popular in New York.

Although every effort hasbeen made to ensure fairnessand accuracy, this list is pub-lished for entertainment pur-poses only and Country YossiFamily Magazine is not re-sponsible for any inaccuraciesor misrepresentations.

1. Simchas Hachaim Vol. 3 - Aderet2. Kolot - Yakov Shwekey - Aderet3. Pischu Li - Simcha Leiner - Aderet

1. Kolot - Yakov Shwekey - Aderet2. Hartzig 2 - Shloime Daskal - Nigun3. Simchas Hachaim vol. 3 - Aderet

1. Kolot - Yakov Shwekey - Aderet2. Hartzig 2 - Shloime Daskal - Nigun3. Hooleh - 8th Day - Aderet

1. Purim Mit de Inter'n Chavraya - Nigun2. Yes You Can - Michoel Schnitzler - Nigun3. Hartzig 2 - Shloime Daskal - Nigun

1. Bnei Heichala - Benny Friedman - Aderet2. Hooleh - 8th Day - Aderet3. New Sun Rising - Moshav Band - Sameach

1. Pischu Li - Simcha Leiner - Aderet2. Beats - Evan Al - Aderet3. Yes You Can - Michoel Schnitzler - Nigun

1. Pischu Li - Simcha Leiner - Aderet2. Kolot - Yakov Shwekey - Aderet3. Hartzig 2 - Shloime Daskal - Nigun

MARCH 2014

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IMPORTANT NOTEThese ratings are sup-

plied by the 7 major Jewishmusic outlets listed here,based on their actual salesover the last thirty days in theGreater New York area.

The list does not reflecttotal sales of any DVD. It doesnot include sales in otherstores, cities or countries (Is-rael!).

The list is designed to bean indication of what’s cur-rently popular in New York.

Although every effort hasbeen made to ensure fairnessand accuracy, this list is pub-lished for entertainment pur-poses only and Country YossiFamily Magazine is not re-sponsible for any inaccuraciesor misrepresentations.

1. Twins from France in Trouble - Aderet2. The Railroad Kids - Zir Chemed Productions3. Mitzvah Blvd: Bella Bracha Goes to a Wedding - Aderet

1. Megillas Lester - Emes Productions2. The Railroad Kids - Zir Chemed Productions3. Mitzvah Blvd: Bella Bracha Goes to a Wedding - Aderet

1. Twins from France in Trouble - Aderet2. Queen of Persia - Chazak3. Mitzvah Blvd: Bella Bracha Goes to a Wedding - Aderet

1. The Railroad Kids - Zir Chemed Productions2. Inter'n Shrift - Nigun3. Twins from France in Trouble - Aderet

1. Mitzvah Blvd: Bella Bracha Goes to a Wedding - Aderet2. Wonders of Hashem Safari Adventure - Aderet3. Queen of Persia - Chazak

1. Megillas Lester - Emes Productions2. Twins from France in Trouble - Aderet3. Mitzvah Blvd: Bella Bracha Goes to a Wedding - Aderet

1. Mitzvah Blvd: Bella Bracha Goes to a Wedding - Aderet2. Twins from France in Trouble - Aderet3. Shape Fitness - Aderet

MARCH 2014

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Chodesh Adar is a specialtime of year. When Adararrives we are command-ed to be happy. No fuss,no muss, no choices and

no excuses, we have to be happywhether we like it or not - that’s an or-der!

This is not an easy task at all, es-pecially for those people who enjoybeing sad. Which leads one to ask avery important question. If someonederives more enjoyment from beingsad than from actually being happy,does he have to still be happy in Adar?Furthermore, if he becomes sad frombeing happy does he violate any hala-chos? And even further, if he enjoysbeing sad so much that he is ecstaticand euphoric from reveling in his uttersadness, how can we tell the differencebetween one another anyway? Whichis his true merry state in such a situa-tion? In such instances it is always im-portant to consult your local compe-tent Purim rav.

On the topic of a Purim rav, it al-ways becomes such a touchy situation.Does a Purim rav have to wear a beardor is a clean shaven rav kosher too?Does he have to wear a beketche orwill a short jacket work as well? Doeshe need to have colored paint in hishair or is he yotze with his natural col-or? Again, consult your local compe-tent Purim rav for such seriousqueries.

When going out with the kids andthe shalach manos it’s not easy keep-ing it all together. Every child has hisown plan and his own ideas. They’reall running around in different direc-tions schnorring food from the neigh-bors who have the best stuff prepared.There’s always one poor soul who

makes the same mistake and gets con-fused on Purim and hands out choco-late Chanukah coins to the kids.

While you may try to have every-thing all set, you know there’s going tobe that one child who gets into themakeup and decides to costume him-self with seven different shades of lip-stick all over his face and arms. Ofcourse this is only after he has alreadytaken the liberty of decorating all thewalls with it. You know he will be sit-ting there quietly trying to blend in, asif you won’t be able to tell who madethe whole mess.

Going to the teachers on Purim isa whole ‘nother parshah. It’s always anactivity that ends up taking up the en-tire day running in every direction. Youknow the teachers won’t all be nextdoor neighbors - it’s almost as if theypurposely all conspired to live at oppo-site sides of town. Further, they all nodoubt pick the exact same time to beavailable to the students, making itphysically impossible to make yourrounds unless you happen to own ateleporter.

Back to the importance of simchain our lives. This is doubly as impor-tant and special during a year like this,when we have two months of Adar.(Will the real Adar please stand up.)All jokes aside, if someone was bornin Adar, when does he celebrate hisbirthday on such a year? You may in-stinctively think to be machmir andcelebrate during both months, butagain, that’s another situation to beconsulted only with a competentPurim rav.

Aside from Purim Katan and theextra days we don’t say tachnun, thereis much else to be thankful for on sucha year with two months of Adar. For

instance, if you were born in Adar ris-hon you finally get to celebrate yourbirthday. Who knows, in another cou-ple of years you may have another par-ty. You have to take ‘em when you canget ‘em!

The extra month of Adar is alsowhat allows us all to have that extratime to get all the costumes ready forthe kids, parents and, in some cases,the grandparents. An extra month ofplanning can make all the difference inwhether one’s costume is simply greator whether it is truly amazing. We allknow how important it is for everyoneto match with each other, with the sha-lach manos and with the table decor atthe Purim seudah.

The bottom line is that chodeshAdar is a very auspicious time. A timefor merriment and celebration. A timefor giving thanks and gratitude. A timefor renewing relationships and forreaching out and forming new ones aswell. Our rich history of Purim, all ofit consequently recorded in clear detailin writing, teaches us much about ourobligation to be happy and thankful,even today, for what took place withour ancestors so many years ago. Sowhen you pop that cork on the cham-pagne and the guy next to you dressedin the cowboy hat and gold suspendersvomits all over your brand new suit,smile and be happy (or sad - if thatfloats your boat) for it is Purim in theworld.

Chaptzem is a heimishe bloggerthat authors the Chaptzem Blog, themost popular heimishe web-site. TheChaptzem Blog has been quoted manytimes in the mainstream media and isviewed by thousands daily.

www.chaptzem.blogspot.com

HilcHos Purim

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The Great Debate

About a century or two ago,the Pope decided that all theJews had to leave the Vatican.Naturally there was a big up-roar from the Jewish commu-nity. So the Pope made adeal. He would have a re-ligious debate with amember of the Jewishcommunity. If the Jewwon, the Jews couldstay. If the Pope won,the Jews would have toleave. The Jews realized thatthey had no choice, but everyone wasafraid to be the one to debate the viciousand devious Pope. Suddenly Moishe theshoemaker raised his hand and vol-unteered to do it. The Jews wereshocked! Moishe was not learnedin either Jewish or secular knowl-edge, but having no option, theyreluctantly agreed. But to hide hisignorance they asked for one newcondition: To make it more inter-esting, neither side would be al-lowed to speak. Thankfully, thePope agreed.

The day of the great debatecame. The whole town came towitness the spectacle. Moisheand the Pope sat opposite eachother for a full minute before thePope raised his hand andshowed three fingers. Moishelooked back at him and raisedone finger.

The Pope waved his fingersin a circle around his head.Moishe pointed to the groundwhere he sat.

The Pope pulled out awafer and a glass of wine.Moishe pulled out an apple. ThePope stood up and said, “I giveup. This man is too good. TheJews can stay.”

An hour later, the cardinalswere all around the Pope asking himwhat happened. The Pope said: “First Iheld up three fingers to represent theTrinity. He responded by holding upone finger to remind me that there wasonly one G-d. Then I waved my finger

around me to show him that G-d wasall around us. He responded by point-ing to the ground and showing that G-dwas also right here with us. Then Ipulled out the wine and the wafer toshow that G-d absolves us from our

sins. He pulled out an apple to remindme of the original sin. He had an an-

swer for everything. Whatcould I do?”

Meanwhile, theJewish community hadcrowded aroundMoishe. “What hap-pened?” they asked.

“Well,” said Moishe,“First he showed methat the Jews had threedays to get out ofhere. I told him that

not one of us was leav-ing. Then he told me that

this whole city would becleared of Jews. I let him know

that we were staying right here.”“And then?” asked a

woman.“I don’t know,” said

Moishe. “He took out hislunch so I took out mine.”

C.E.Boro Park

Speech TherapyA man goes to his

doctor and hands him anote that says, “I can’ttalk. Please help me.”

“Okay,” says the doc-tor. “Put your thumb onthe table.”

The man doesn’t un-derstand how that willhelp, but he does what he’stold.

The doctor picks up ahuge book and drops it onthe man’s thumb.

“AAAAAAAA!” theman yells.

“Good,” says the doc-tor. “Come back tomorrowand we’ll work on ‘B.’”

G.B.Flatbush

H U M O R

Send your true anecdotes, embarrassing moments, bright say-ings, real life experiences, or any interesting incident relating toJewish life in America to: COUNTRY YOSSI MAGAZINE, 131048th Street, Brooklyn, New York 11219. All printed submissionswill receive free tapes or another valuable prize. Winners shouldbring legal I.D. PRIZES WILL NOT BE MAILED

e-mail: [email protected]

Saw the Son-in-LawTwo women came before wise King Solomon, dragging

between them a young man in a three-piece suit. “This younglawyer agreed to marry my daughter,” said the first one.

“No! He agreed to marry MY daughter,” said the other.And so they haggled before the king until he called for

silence.“Bring me my biggest sword,” said Solomon, “and I

shall saw the young attorney in half. Each of you shall re-ceive a half.”

“Sounds good to me,” said the first woman.But the other woman said, “Oh Sire, do not spill inno-

cent blood. Let the other woman’s daughter marry him.”The wise king did not hesitate a moment. “The attorney

must marry the first lady’s daughter,” he proclaimed.“But she was willing to hew him in two!” exclaimed the

king’s court.“Indeed,” said wise King Solomon. “That shows she is

the TRUE mother-in-law.”

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Ican’t believe Purim is justaround the corner. It seems likeonly yesterday that my husbandtook down the Succah. Oh, waita second! It was yesterday!

I head down to the basement tosee what’s left over from last Purim.After stepping over Lego pieces, dolls,puzzles and other toys, (that’s it! Nextyear they all get underwear forChanukah) I finally reach thekemeral (that’s a little room inthe basement where specialjunk is stored).

As I sort through some ofthe hamantashen and marzipan,I can’t help but wonder howthings have changed over theyears.

Gone are the days whenyou just sent someone a fruit, orhamantash and wine on a plainpaper plate, covered with a nap-kin. Now your shalach manoshas to have a theme!

I’ve gotten a breakfasttheme: A mug filled with asmall jar of coffee, a packet ofsugar and some danishes; an Italiantheme: A box of spaghetti, sauce, wineand cheese. I’ve gotten a picnic theme:Salami, rolls, mustard, ketchup, potatosalad and soda in a basket; and a med-ical theme which included aspirins,band aids, iodine and Q-tips.

People don’t know what to doanymore. They send fish platters, meatplatters and cheese platters. I’ve gottena gumball machine filled with jellybeans, and a real percolator filled withground coffee. One woman even hadthe chutzpah to send me a box of Alllaundry detergent, and attached was abag of her dirty laundry.

Some women even pay to take acourse to learn how to make somethingreally special. I once received a plantmade of fruit leather and dried fruit.(No matter how much I water it, itdoesn’t grow). If you really rate, youmay receive a basket from The Or-chard or better yet, a sterling silverdish filled with all kinds of goodies.

People now send their shalachmanos in beautiful boxes, colorfulshopping bags, magnificent baskets

and on stunning “designer” paperplates. And this year’s new rage - amusical shalach manos that playsLaYehudim when you open it up.

And it’s no longer acceptable tojust write Simchas Purim on a piece ofpaper and tape it on to the package.Now there are a variety of cards tochoose from. For those of you who arereally talented - you write your own

poem, like this one I received last year:“Roses are red. Violets are blue. Youdidn’t send me. I’m not sending you!”

Gone are the days when you sentshalach manos to a few neighbors onthe block and a few relatives. Now yousend shalach manos to every friend,acquaintance, relative, co-worker,neighbor, lantzman, doctor, rabbi,storekeeper and accountant. My friendeven gave one to her meter reader. “Erhut eer ungekicked!”

The women stay at home to re-ceive the shalach manos, while themen and kids ride around all day fromone end of Brooklyn to the other, mak-ing deliveries. And we live in Monsey!

And do you know what a deliverycosts these days? Forget a quarter orfifty cents. We’re talking big bucks!Two dollars and up! My kids earnmore money an hour than I do.

Speaking of my kids, I’m puzzled.All year they complain how they hatetheir teachers, how unfair they are. Butcomes Purim - they must bring themshalach manos. That means anotherfew extra stops with the car. That’s

easier said than done. Traffic is backedup for miles, and every street I need, isclosed altogether to make way for theparade! It becomes one big nightmare.

And let’s not forget Megillahreading. Gone are the days when youstamped your feet and merely turnedthe grager when Haman’s name wasread. Now, fire crackers go off, taperecorded laugh tracks play, sirens

blare, horns toot, guns are fired,crazy string is shpritzed, snap-pers are thrown, stink bombs gooff - and all this is done by thefathers!

Gone are the days when, ifyou wanted to dress up as abride, you put your mother’slace half slip on your head. Nowyou have thirty-three styles ofgowns to choose from and thir-teen different head pieces, allmore lavish than the one I woreto my wedding.

Today, kids and adults canbuy or rent almost any costumethey desire, from a rebbe toKing Kong. So what if the bill

comes to $300 - make the check out to“cash” - your husband will never knowthe difference.

Let’s face it. Even though Purimis a hectic time, it’s still a lot of fun.The kids have a blast (not to mentionsome adults). Rabbeim graciouslyopen up their homes to their talmidimand the talmidim ungraciously throwup all over the carpeting. Families gettogether for a delicious seudah ofwhich hardly anything is eaten becauseeveryone noshed all day. And tzedakahis given with an open hand.

For the next four weeks we’ll allbe busy eating three hundred peanutchews, five hundred winkies, one thou-sand cases worth of Kedem grapejuice, pineapples, challah (of whichsome can be used as paper weights orbookmarks), tons and tons of gooeycake vos hut mine Bubba’s taam, andvarious kinds of flavored haman-tashen.

But when all is said and done, youknow who really enjoys Purim themost? Paskesz, Lieber’s and Blooms!

Happy Purim!

ANOTHER KAYLA CLASSIC

KaylaKuchle f fe lPURIM MANIA

H U M O R



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AROUND TOWN

Statcare, a name synonymouswith excellent healthcare, haswowed the community yet again.

After 8 years at their original location,Statcare has relocated to a new andbigger state-of-the-art office.

PA Stuie Goldwasser, adminis-trator and practitioner, says biggermeans we can offer more to our cus-tomers - not just more space but moreservices. Patients have been askinghim for years to do pediatric primarycare and for all those who were wait-ing, this is one of the new and excitinghappenings at Statcare. PediatricianDr Tzvi Wilbur, PA Stuie Goldwass-er and PA Chaya Stern are headingthe pediatric division. Well visits, im-

munizations and sick visits for pedi-atrics will begin in March.

Dr. Thomas Fuchs, Dr. StevenSiegel and PA Stuie Goldwasser,heading the adult division, continue tooffer well visits and sick visits foradult and geriatric patients.

Also new to the practice, there isnow a Podiatrist available for all yourfoot care needs.

Statcare, the innovator of latenight urgent care in Boro Park, has alot more in store in the near future.

Their new wheelchair accessibleground floor office is conveniently lo-cated at 1270 51st Street.

Their telephone number remainsthe same: 718-431-9870.



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KAUFMAN’S DESIGN JEWELRY ..................(718) 871-3575 ................................19

KING’S COUNTY AUTO BODY......................(718) 339-9500 ..............................106

KOBY’S TRANSPOTOURS INC. ....................(800) 872-5629 ..............................138

KUPAT HA’IR...................................................(866) 221-9352 ..................................9

LAYETTE 4 LESS............................................(917) 710-2021 ..............................133

LE CHOCOLATIER EXTRAORDINAIRE........(718) 258-5800 ................................29

LEFKOWITZ FINE JEWELER ........................(718) 431-0150 ................................10

LIGHTING PALACE ........................................(718) 252-7722 ................................61

LUXURY LIGHTING ........................................(718) 384-4490 ................................43

MAAYAN ISRAEL............................................(718) 568-9112 ................................40

MATERNICHIC MATERNITY ..........................(718) 258-6193 ................................93

MEAL MART OF AVE M .................................(718) 998-0800...............................111

MEFOAR/MALCHUT JUDAICA......................(718) 436-0707 ........................96, 103

MEGILLAS LESTER.................................................................................................34

MEIR KESSLER,RPA-C ..................................(718) 252-9066 ................................11

MITZVAH BOULEVARD .........................................................................................128

MOLD PRO......................................................(888) 705-6653 ................................44

MORAH RIVKY PLAY-GROUP .......................(718) 926-9318 ..............................138

MOSHE KLEIN ................................................(347) 244-0318 ..............................108

MR. WHEAT.....................................................(347) 663-1100 ................................55

NATIONAL HOME FURNISHINGS .................(732) 367-9800...............................119

NICDROP.........................................................(732) 903-5212 ................................31

OIL PAINTING .................................................(718) 851-0920 ................................92

OZER NEUMAN OPTICIANS..........................(718) 435-1253 ..............................102

PEDULLA CERAMIC TILES ...........................(718) 377-7746 ..................................4

PETALS ...........................................................(718) 853-7060 ................................41

PRESTIGE SHOES .........................................(718) 338-3881 ................................64

QUALITY CARPET..........................................(718) 941-4200 ..............................101

RABBI MOSHE MEIR WEISS.........................(718) 983-7095 ..............................105

RAMBAM FORMULA......................................lifetransformingdiet.com .............116

REAL TO REEL...............................................(718) 438-3000 ................................60

REB KINERET.................................................(347) 554-8549 ......Inside Front Cover

RENAH APPLIANCE REPAIR ........................(718) 694-0900 ................................27

ROLLS SUSHI.................................................(718) 998-2026 ..............................107

RUACH DAY CAMP ........................................(718) 646-8500 ................................78

SHILUACH HAKAN.........................................(917) 923-0995 ................................35

SHIRT STOP....................................................(718) 871-1620...............................118

SHLOMO SMILES...........................................(718) 380-2574 ................................98

SILKY LASER .................................................(347) 587-7304 ................................66

SIMONE’S WIGS.............................................(718) 339-5616 ................................54

SLEEPTIGHT BEDDING.................................(718) 438-3933 ..............................134

SMILING HERBS.............................................(347) 546-2792 ................................76

STATCARE ......................................................(718) 431-9870....Outside Back Cover

STRETTINER SIMCHA HALL.........................(718) 258-9685 ................................93

SUPREME HELP.............................................(718) 704-0699 ................................53

SURGICAL SOCK SHOP II.............................(718) 436-7880 ................................24

SWEETNESS DELIGHT..................................(718) 233-2924 ................................20

THE PRESENT PLACE...................................(347) 415-0634 ................................91

THE WINE BARREL .......................................(718) 436-1031 ................................18

THE WINE SOICHER ......................................(718) 757-5012 ..................................7

THE WINERY...................................................(718) 436-3323 ................................13

THREE STAR STUDIO....................................(718) 376-1922 ................................99

TRAFFIC VIOLATIONS...................................(917) 988-5800 ................................62

TSIVIA’S JEWELRY ........................................(347) 232-3896 ..............................138

TUVIA’S JUDAICA ..........................................(845) 426-0824 ......Inside Back Cover

VINTAGE GIFTS..............................................(347) 423-1469...............................115

WE’RE HAVING A PARTY ..............................(718) 836-3701 ..............................114

WEIGHT NO MORE ........................................(718) 998-8898 ................................95

WHOOPI ..........................................................(718) 853-5411...............................136

WILLIAMSBURG SEWING & VACUUM.........(718) 384-0851 ................................57

WNW & SONS.................................................(718) 633-4540 ..............................102

WORK FROM HOME ......................................(718) 436-3953 ..............................138

YITZCHAK WEISSMAN ..................................(347) 522-3272 ................................12

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CY Family Mag #190