© 2007 by Nelson, a division of Thomson Canada Limited. Ch. 3-1 Chapter 3 Improving Writing Techniques

Ch. 3-1

© 2007 by Nelson, a division of Thomson Canada Limited.© 2007 by Nelson, a division of Thomson Canada Limited. Ch. 3-1

Chapter 3Chapter 3

Improving

Writing Techniques

Ch. 3-2


Formal Research Methods for Gathering Information

Formal Research Methods for Gathering Information

Search manually (books, magazines, journals).

Access electronically (Internet databases, the Web).

Go to the source (interviews, surveys, questionnaires, focus groups).

Conduct scientific experiments (measure variables using control groups).

Ch. 3-3


Informal Research Methods for Gathering Information

Informal Research Methods for Gathering Information

Search company files.

Talk with your boss.

Interview the target audience.

Conduct an informal survey.

Brainstorm for ideas.

Ch. 3-4


Organize Information with an Outline


TitleI. First major component

A. First sub-point1. Detail, illustration, evidence2. Detail, illustration, evidence

B. Second sub-point1. Detail, illustration, evidence2. Detail, illustration, evidence

Ch. 3-5




II. Second major componentA. First sub-point

1. Detail, illustration, evidence

2. Detail, illustration, evidence

Ch. 3-6




Tips:• Define main topic in title.• Divide the topic into major components (3-5).• Break the components into sub-points.• Strive to make each component exclusive (no

overlapping).• Don’t put a single item under a major component.• Use details, illustrations, and evidence to support

sub-points.

Ch. 3-7


Organizing Business MessagesOrganizing Business Messages

Direct StrategyMain idea comes first

followed by details

and explanations

Indirect StrategyExplanation precedes main idea

Ch. 3-8



Direct StrategyAdvantages: Saves reader’s time Sets a proper frame of

mind Prevents frustration

Indirect StrategyAdvantages: Respects feelings of

audience Encourages a fair

hearing Minimizes a negative

reaction

Ch. 3-9



Direct StrategyUseful when: Receiver is receptive Receiver requires no

education about topic Message is routine

Indirect StrategyUseful when: Receiver may be upset Receiver may be hostile Receiver must be

persuaded or educated Message is sensitive

Ch. 3-10


Effective SentencesEffective Sentences

Complete sentences have subjects and verbs and make sense (are capable of standing alone).

Example:

Subject Verb

Employees send many e-mail messages.

Ch. 3-11



Clauses also have subjects and verbs. Independent clauses can stand alone. Dependent clauses rely on independent clauses for their meaning.

Example: Dependent Clause Independent Clause

When you speak, you reveal yourself.

Ch. 3-12



Phrases are groups of related words without subjects and verbs.

Example: Phrase Phrase

In the afternoon, I work at the mall.

Ch. 3-13



Avoid sentence fragments. Fragment

Even though the pay was low. Many candidates applied.

Revision:Even though the pay was low, many candidates

applied.

Ch. 3-14



Avoid run-on (fused) sentences. Fused Sentences

Two candidates applied only one was hired.

Revisions:Two candidates applied. Only one was hired.

Two candidates applied; only one was hired.

Two candidates applied, but only one was hired.

Ch. 3-15



Avoid comma-splice sentences. Comma SpliceMany were qualified, Jeff was hired.

Revisions:Many were qualified. Jeff was hired.Many were qualified; Jeff was hired.Many were qualified; however, Jeff was hired.Many were qualified, but Jeff was hired.

Ch. 3-16


Try Your SkillTry Your Skill

Revise the following to avoid fragments, run-on sentences, and comma-splices. You can create a Web-based job portfolio it

will impress potential employers.

You can create a Web-based job portfolio; it will impress potential employers.

Ch. 3-17



Revise the following to avoid fragments, run-on sentences, and comma-splices. Send a scannable résumé. When you apply

for a job.

Send a scannable résumé when you apply for a job.

Ch. 3-18



Revise the following to avoid fragments, run-on sentences, and comma-splices. Although technical skills are important.

Communication skills are also in great demand. Although technical skills are important, communication skills are also in great demand.

Ch. 3-19



Revise the following to avoid fragments, run-on sentences, and comma-splices. College used to be for young people,

however many older students now seek degrees. College used to be for young people; however, many older students now seek degrees.

Ch. 3-20


Emphasis Through MechanicsEmphasis Through Mechanics

Underlining:

Which of these methods do you prefer?

Ch. 3-21



Italics and Boldface:The use of boldface and italics captures the reader’s attention.

Ch. 3-22



All Caps:

Notice how EXPENSE-FREE stands out.

Ch. 3-23



Dashes:Other methods–including dashes–may be used.

Ch. 3-24



Font Changes:

• Changing from a large font to a smaller font or to a different font adds interest and emphasis.

Ch. 3-25



Tabulation:Listing items vertically emphasizes them:

1. First item2. Second item3. Third item

Ch. 3-26



Other means of achieving mechanical emphasis include the following: use of white space, colour, lines, boxes, columns, titles, headings, and subheadings.

Which of the above techniques are appropriate in business letters? Memos? E-mail messages? Reports?

Ch. 3-27


Emphasis and De-emphasis Through Style


To emphasize an idea:• Use vivid words, such as in “bug-free software”

rather than “dependable software.”• Label the main idea. For example, use phrases such

as more importantly, the principal reason, or the best alternative.

• Put the important idea first or last in the sentence.• Put the important idea in a simple sentence or in an

independent clause.

Ch. 3-28




To de-emphasize an idea:• Use general, rather than specific, words (some

customers complained, rather than 125 customers complained).

• Place the idea in a dependent clause connected to an independent clause containing a positive idea.

Example:

Although items cannot be returned for cash, you will receive

store credit for any returned purchase.

Ch. 3-29


Active- and Passive-Voice Verbs


Active-voice verbs show the subject performing the action.

Examples:

Most major employers require drug testing. (Active voice; the subject is acting)

Dr. Smith recommended Tina for the job. (Active voice; the subject is acting)

Ch. 3-30




In passive-voice sentences, the subject is acted upon. Passive-voice verbs require helper verbs.

Examples:Drug testing is required by most major employers.

(Passive voice; the subject is being acted upon)

Tina was recommended for the job by Dr. Smith. (Passive voice; the subject is being acted upon)

Ch. 3-31




Use the active voice for most business writing. Use the passive voice to emphasize an action

or the recipient of the action–rather than the actor (Specialists were hired; Laura was honored).

Use the passive voice to de-emphasize bad news (Although your lease cannot be renewed, we can offer . . . ).

Ch. 3-32



Convert the following sentence to active voice. You may have to add a subject. Our membership meeting was postponed by

the president.

The president postponed our membership meeting.

Ch. 3-33



Convert the following sentence to active voice. You may have to add a subject. The résumés of job candidates are sorted

quickly by the software program Resumix.

The software program Resumix sorts résumés of job candidates quickly.

Ch. 3-34



Convert the following sentence to active voice. You may have to add a subject. Computer paper was ordered yesterday.

Rachel ordered computer paper yesterday.

Ch. 3-35



Convert the following sentence to passive voice. We must delay shipment of your

merchandise because of heavy demand.

Your merchandise shipment must be delayed because of heavy demand.

Ch. 3-36



Convert the following sentence to passive voice. The technician could not install the

computer program.

The computer program could not be installed.

Ch. 3-37


Developing ParallelismDeveloping Parallelism

Parallelism is a writing technique that creates balanced writing. Match nouns with nouns, verbs with verbs, phrases with phrases, and clauses with clauses.

Ch. 3-38



Poor: The process of writing involves organizing, composing, and

revision.

Parallel: The process of writing involves organizing, composing, and revising. (Matches -ing

verbs)

Ch. 3-39



Poor: We are very concerned with the quality of raw materials, where

they are located, and how much it costs to transport them.

Parallel: We are very concerned with the quality, location, and

transpor- tation costs of raw materials. (Matches nouns)

Ch. 3-40



Poor: Serena takes the telephone orders, Matt locates the items in

the warehouse, and the items are sent by Yolanda.

Parallel: Serena takes the telephone orders, Matt locates the items

in the warehouse, and Yolanda sends the items. (Matches

active- voice verbs)

Ch. 3-41


UnityUnity

Unified sentences contain thoughts that are related to only one main idea. The ideas in a sentence are better expressed by separating the two dissimilar clauses and by adding a connecting phrase.

Ch. 3-42


UnityUnity

Poor: Our customer service is excellent, and you may visit our website at any time.

Unified: Our customer service is excellent. For added convenience, you may visit our website at any time.

Ch. 3-43


Imprecise WritingImprecise Writing

Imprecise writing occurs when sentences twist or turn unexpectedly away from the main thought.

To correct, revise it so that the reader understands the relationship between the thoughts.

Ch. 3-44


Imprecise WritingImprecise Writing

Poor: The laptop that you sold me is excellent, and I have a

vacation scheduled soon.

Precise: The laptop that you sold me is excellent. When I go on my

vacation next week, I’ll be sure to bring it along.

Ch. 3-45



How could parallelism be improved in the following sentence? Our knowledge management system focuses

on the collecting, storage, and sharing of best practices.

Our knowledge management system focuses on the collecting, storing, and sharing of best practices.

Ch. 3-46



How could parallelism be improved in the following sentence? We are pleased to recommend Elizabeth

because she has sincerity, she is reliable, and she works with diligence.

We are pleased to recommend Elizabeth because she is sincere, reliable, and diligent.

Ch. 3-47


Dangling and Misplaced Modifiers


For clarity, modifiers must be close to the words they describe or limit. Be particularly careful to place a logical subject immediately after an introductory verbal phrase.

Ch. 3-48




Poor: After considering the problem carefully, new procedures were

suggested by management.

Revised: After considering the problem carefully, management

suggested new procedures.

Ch. 3-49




Poor: Any student has full on-line privileges who is enrolled in the

college.

Revised: Any student who is enrolled in the college has full on-line privileges.

Ch. 3-50




Poor: It’s hard to understand why employees would not go to our

technical support staff with software problems.

Revised: It’s hard to understand why employees with software

problems would not go to our technical support staff.

Ch. 3-51




Poor: Using a search engine, the Web site was finally located.

Revised: Using a search engine, we finally located the Web site.

Ch. 3-52



Revise the following sentence to correct any misplaced modifiers. Retain the introductory phrase. To be hired, two years of experience is

required.

To be hired, one must have two years of experience.

Ch. 3-53



Revise the following sentence to correct any misplaced modifiers. Retain the introductory phrase. Dipped in butter, you can really enjoy a fine

lobster.

Dipped in butter, a fine lobster can truly be enjoyed.

Ch. 3-54



Revise the following sentence to correct any misplaced modifiers. She died in the house in which she was born

at the age of 88.

At the age of 88, she died in the house in which she was born.

Ch. 3-55



Revise the following sentence to correct any misplaced modifiers. To receive an employment form, fill out this

application. (Tricky!) The sentence is correct as it stands. “You” is the understood subject of a command.

Ch. 3-56


Three Ways to Achieve Paragraph Coherence Three Ways to Achieve Paragraph Coherence

To help guide your reader or listener from one thought to another, develop coherence by using one of these devices:1. Repeat a key idea or key word(s).

Next month we plan to launch a promotion for our new Web site. The

promotion will involve newspaper and TV campaigns.

Ch. 3-57


Three Ways to Achieve Paragraph Coherence Three Ways to Achieve Paragraph Coherence

2. Use a pronoun.

Considerable interest is now being shown in our extended GIC’s. They are more

profitable when left on deposit for long periods of time.

Ch. 3-58


Three Ways to Achieve Paragraph Coherence


3. Use an appropriate transitional expression.

Time Associationbefore, after

first, second

meanwhile

next

until

when, whenever

Contrastalthough

but

however

instead

nevertheless

on the other hand

Ch. 3-59





Cause, Effectconsequently

for this reason

hence

therefore

Additional Ideafurthermore

in addition

likewise

moreover

similarly

Ch. 3-60





Illustrationfor example

in this way

Ch. 3-61


Paragraph LengthParagraph Length

Paragraphs with eight or fewer printed lines look inviting and readable.

Ch. 3-62


Composing the First DraftComposing the First Draft

Complete all necessary research. Find a quiet place to concentrate and work. Prohibit calls, visitors, and interruptions. Organize information using an outline. Decide whether to sprint write (get your

thoughts down quickly and revise later) or revise as you go.

Imagine you are talking to a reader or listener.

Ch. 3-63


End

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© 2007 by Nelson, a division of Thomson Canada Limited. Ch. 3-1 Chapter 3 Improving Writing Techniques