Conflict Management Compre

Conflict Management

GEO BABYSNGIST

Conflict

What is it?

A Disagreement Between Two or More Parties Who Perceive They Have Incompatible Concerns

Conflict

Why do we do it?

What we know…. Conflict is a naturally occurring

phenomenon for human beings People do not get involved in conflict

situations unless they have some stake in the relationship or outcome or both

Facts Methods Goals Values

Conflict

Why do we care?

Study of American Management association

24% of executive time is on CM Conflict management ability is a key

competency The topic gains great importance

Causes Misunderstanding Personality clashes Value and Goal difference Substandard performance Difference over method Responsibility issues Lack of cooperation

Causes Authority issues Frustration and irritability Competition for limited resources Non-compliance with rules and

responsibilities

What we know…. The costs of unmanaged conflict can be

high, but the gains from using differences creatively can also be great

Conflict can either be functional or dysfunctional

Dysfunctional Diverts energy from real task Destroys morale Polarize individuals and groups Deepens differences Obstruct cooperative action Produce irresponsible actions Create suspision and di

Functional Opens up issue in a confronting manner Develops clarification of an issue Improve problem solving quality Increase involvement Improve communication Initiate growth Strengthens a relationship Increase productivity

First Trick for Conflict Management

Know Yourself

What feelings do you have when you are in

conflict situation?

Common Feelings Associated with Conflict

AngerFrustration

FearExcitement

Common Actions Associated with Conflict

Fight Flight

Your History with Conflict How was conflict perceived in your

family/community? How did your family/community

deal with conflict?

You can decide... Understanding the impact of your

family and community on your ideas about conflict can allow you to make decisions about how you deal with conflict now

We are our history We make our history

What is your conflict style?

Conflict StylesRELATIONSHIP

High Importance

Low ImportanceHighImportance

GOALS

3 5

1 2

4


High Importance


GOALS

3 5

1--Turtle 2

4

Turtle--Withdrawing Avoid conflict as all costs Give up their personal goals &

relationships Believe it is hopeless to try to resolve

conflict Feel helpless Easier to withdraw than face conflict


High Importance


GOALS

3 5

1 2--Shark

4

Shark--Forcing Try to overpower opponents by forcing

them to accept their solutions Not concerned with needs of others Do not care about how others perceive them Believe in winning and losing Winning gives them a sense of pride Try to win by attacking, overwhelming, &

intimidating others


High Importance


GOALS

3--Teddy Bear 5

1 2

4

Teddy Bear--Smoothing Relationships most important, goals of

little importance Want to be accepted and liked by other

people Believe conflict should be avoided in

favor of harmony Fearful that conflict will hurt someone


High Importance


GOALS

3 5

1 2

4--Fox

Fox--Compromising Moderately concerned with relationships

and goals Willing to sacrifice part of their goals

and relationships in order to find agreement for the common good


High Importance


GOALS

3 5--Owl

1 2

4

Owl--Confronting Value their own goals and relationships View conflicts as problems to be solved See conflicts as improving relationships

by reducing tension Seek solutions that satisfy both parties Not satisfied until solution is found and

tension is reduced

Which style is better?

Some styles are more useful than others

when...

Uses of the “Turtle” When issue is trivial When potential damage of confrontation

outweighs the benefits To let people cool down & reduce tension When gathering information When others can resolve the conflict

more effectively

Uses of the “Shark” When quick, decisive action is vital On important issues where unpopular

actions need to be implemented To protect yourself against people who

take advantage of noncompetitive behavior

Uses of “Teddy Bear” When you realize you are wrong To learn from others When issue is more important to the

other person than to yourself As a goodwill gesture to maintain

cooperative relationship To allow others to experiment

Uses of “Fox” When goals are important, but not worth

the effort or disruption When opponents with equal power are

strongly committed To achieve temporary settlements to

complex issues

Uses of “Owl” To find an integrative solution when both

sides are too important to compromise When your objective is to learn To work through hard feelings which

have been interfering with a relationship

Second Trick for Conflict Management

Understand Process of Conflict

Expectations (explicit)

Anticipation (implicit)Experience Unfulfilled

Expectations

Resentments Build

Gather evidence for a case

Give up

intervene

Why & how do we get in conflict situations?

The issues The facts: present situation, problems The goals: how things ought to be, the

future conditions sought The methods: the best, the easiest, the

quickest, the most ethical The values: the beliefs about priorities

that should be observed in choosing goals & methods

The history: what has gone on before

Components of a Conflict Situation

Frustration--when you feel blocked. Conceptualization of problem-- “What’s

going on?” Conceptualization of behaviors &

intentions-- “What does that mean?” Outcome--emotional, cognitive,

behavioral

What can we do???How do we intervene???

Accept that you will have conflict Work toward having functional vs.

dysfunctional conflict Use conflict management skills

– De-escalation– “I”- Messages

Indicators of Escalation Competition Not Listening Spreading to new

issues

Dealing in personalities

Threats Intentional Hurt Violating Social

Rules

Indicators of De-escalation Listening. Trying

to understand. Showing Tact.

Concern for other’s feelings.

Goodwill gestures.

Appeals to De-escalate.

Airing feelings. Finding

alternatives.

“I”-Messages

Describe: Behavior Feelings ConsequenceBeware of war words!!

Analyzing a Conflict Situation

Conflict was between________ It centered around_________ I wanted___________ and felt frustrated because __________ In my view, the key issue was _______ The other person probably thought the

key issue was ___________

Analyzing a Conflict Situation

Predominant conflict style I used_____ Escalation behaviors I used________ De-escalation behaviors I used______ Major outcomes_____________ Differences over: facts, goals, methods,

values, history___________ What would I do differently next time?

Business

Conflict Management Compre