DEVELOPING A HEALTHY VIEW OF YOUTH SPORTS..STOP THE MADNESS!

Where are we now...The Good:Many opportunities for our youthBroad range of ability-appropriate activitiesGreat opportunities for socialization, healthy competition, physical development.We want our kids active!

The Challenges:Parents/coaches looking from the top down i.e. professional levelRed Shirting of youthPraise/Support based on athletic/academic success not emotional socialKids are in adult-mode too soonWide variety of coaching philosophies and stylesSkill and competition have bled in to playSports can be exclusive

The Current Landscape...Youth sportsRecreational aspects are lost - viewed as a means to an endEarly Specialization - where are the 3-sport athletes today?Structured play is the new norm of physical activityCompetition at a young age is intense/pressure-filledParticipation is not just local - travel is expectedYouth sports participation is in decline...BURNOUT!

The Athletic CultureSUCCESS is mis-defined by most. Many times the parent definition collides with a childs definition

Winning and being the best is not a feasible concept with youth..or healthy starting point for parenting

Individual success has a greater emphasis than team success

We live in a broken world with high rate of family issues

Lack of men in the lives of children..parental erosion

Money, Fame, and Attention...drives the culture

Do we have some athletic cultural concerns?

HELP! What is a parent to do?Get a life..how much emotional energy do you invest in your childs regular life?Be a guide and a mentor. Let talent/desire guide their age-appropriate activitiesSet time for creative play...unstructured play. Allow athletics to be their choiceGive them athletic space and freedom to have input in decisions about their intensityResist specialization at an early ageTravel sports...dont rush itBe proactive in setting athletic boundaries

Goals for your active child...

Develop them as Coachable in lifeListening SkillsPositive Risk TakerLeader / ConfidentCompassionTeam PlayerSelf-MotivatedComposure in Training

Develop DisciplineSelf-StarterWilling to put themselves in challengesAn on/off switchSeeing Positives in LifeHealthy RelentlessnessDetail OrientedOwnership

Developing the athletic family.... Healthy UnhealthyVary activities and pressure Rank winning as a high priorityModel poise and support SpecializationSeparate home and athletics Push weights and conditioning too earlyMake family the center Parent motivation vs. child motivationAllow emotional output Stifle emotional outputCreate a working vocabulary Create a pressured vocabulary

Who is your support system? Parents are ALWAYS the primary influence. A coach is a secondary support...NOT a primary support.. Red Flags PositivesScreamer/scrimmager Enthusiastic and positiveMotivated to advance himself or his child All-inclusivePoor organization Role modelLots of standing around Organized and predictableNo communication Knows the sportAvoids parents Builds in funBlack and white (inflexible) Outlined expectationsCommands respect Is respected

We are 24/7 Role Models...If we want the athletic culture we better be able to manage it in a healthy way!

Basic Concepts in Healthy AthleticsSPORTSMANSHIP-TOUGHNESS-COMPETITION-WINNING

SPORTSMANSHIPMust be at the front end of all developmentIs a pattern-building developmentStrengthened by modeling, family structure, repetitionConsists of...control, humility, courage, respect, fairness, reaction to setbacks, values, compassion

TOUGHNESSNeed to understand how to teach this in a healthy way...confidence, knowledge,controlled aggression, and experience.Stress is the barometer for parents and teaching toughnessPractice positive feedback, allow meltdowns, give time before discussing, dont micro manage emotions

COMPETITIONDoes not need a scoreboard...it is innate for kids to compete in any activity that involves othersIs a progressive learning skill...starting small (counter-cultural)Is a life skill and applicable to many environments...should be taught this way tooCompetition can be individualized in order to not negatively affect others

WINNINGLike competition, winning is a progressive skill...dont wait for a problem! (shared frustration vs. directed frustration)Important to teach the value of enjoying others succeedingSpread the wealth and create shared success activitiesToo much success early is ticking bombIndividualize winning for the highly competitive child

So how do you manage?Again...family is number 1 (not revolve around sports/coaching) Look for signs of burnout in your children Find amateur role models and avoid polarizing professional athletesCreate a network of like-minded parents (on both teams) Know the game, know the rules...teach the rules Dad...chill out/game face..keep yourself in checkBuild in no-sport weekends and/or days Downplay games.....Up-play practiceEncourage a variety of experiences Discourage sports cliques...players AND parents! Accept/support good coaches be professional about dealing with concerns Timing of communication important with both athlete and coachesLove/Affection have nothing to do with performance

Being a good sports parent is easier than you think!

Kurt W. FaustWalk Strong - Men's Outreach CoordinatorOffensive Line SpecialistPresident S.T.E.P UP kurt@coachstepup.com(989) 488-0741