InheritanceOur Legacy

by Julie Carboni

Old TraditionsJewish Oral Tradition

stories were past down from generation to generation

Still part of modern

Mantle/Blessing Promise was given to Abraham

Isaac passing on the the blessing to Jacob

Jacob passed the blessing on to all his sons

Mantle/anointing passed down from Elisha to Elijah

Adopted Men influenced by their upbringing

Moses raised in the Kings Palace helped his mentality to look beyond slave mentality to kingdom mentality

Samuel influenced by Eli the priest.

They could choose to follow after David or their natural fathers (evil or good Kings).

Joash was hidden from Athaliah and raised by the priest Jehoiada and did what was right in the sight of the Lord (2 Chronicles 24:2)

Kings in Old Testament

Our legacies/inheritance What is passed down from our families

What traits

Stories, Traditions, culture

Patterns

Application: Share with one person near you (a new person) a positive trait or tradition passed down in your family

Power Differential

pebble verses a Boulder

Examples of legacies

Modern Jews- Holocaust Stories

Genogram

1. A system in delusion and denial

2. Idealization of parents – fantasy bond

3. Control madness

4. Intergenerational (will be passed on)

5. Approval must be earned

6. Rigid roles

7. Closed system

8. Rigid family boundary

9. Secrets – no talk rule

10. Compulsive / addictive

11. Perfectionistic

12. Frozen feelings

13. Shaming / blaming

14. Punishing / permissive

15. Unhealthy competition

16. Roles assigned by system ( each individual exists for family needs – no

choice

17. Rigid or enmeshed ego boundaries, cultural boundaries, intra-family

boundaries

18. Disables will – loss of freedom

Hero Dad’s scapegoat

Little parent Mom scapegoat Little princess Confidante Sacrifice

Victim (physical illness) Dad star victim Lost Child Religious one Family referee

Parents’ parent Underachiever Rebel Rascal Offender

Dad’s buddy Designated patient Perfect one Cute one Mascot

Family counselor Addict Mom’s buddy Clown Loser

Winner Surrogate spouse Saint Sunshine Sick one

Genius Caretaker Pretty one Overachiever Family scapegoat

Mom’s enabler Athlete The problem

Heroine Peacemaker

All Members of the Family are Co-dependent

Roles of Children in Family

Addicted to: Addict Worry

Sadness Religion

Roles: Super

Spouse Enabler Martyr

Addicted to: Alcohol, Drugs Work, Power,

Sex, Food Religion

Gambling, Rage

Roles: Offender Victim Rebel Family

Scapegoat

Profile of a Dysfunctional Family System

Addict Co-addict

INTIMACY

NON

Bradshaw, John, Bradshaw On: THE FAMILY, A Revolutionary Way Of Self Discovery, Health Communications, 1998

JULIE’S GENOGRAM

infidelity when GM was pregnant with youngestDied when my father was 15 heart attackAlcoholic Nag, Anxiety, Catholic divorced, Mom 11

DVimmigrated Ireland

infidelity started when Mom was pregnant with youngest0-10 temper, abusive

Work-alcoholicDAD divorced on my 13th bd MOM

Julie

13 12 11 10 7

X

Dad influence

Dad’s Influences Adaptations Outcome

Overly Anxious Mother Fragile Ego, Perfectionist, Rigid, Insecure

Attention from other Women showing interest made him feel worthy

Domestic Violent home Shut down emotions, 0 - 10 temper, physically abusive

Narcissistic traits

Alcoholic Father died when he was 15 Work alcoholic Harsh parent, difficulty showing emotions other than anger

Julie’s Influences Adaptations Outcome

Abusive Father, DV towards Childrenbad temper, felt divorced from Dad during divorce as well

Co-dependency, people pleaser UNDER JESUS BLOOD LINEWorked through Co-Dependency (in earlier years)

Enmeshed Mother perfectionist, never feeling good enough

Worked on healthier boundaries

Parentified Rejection, Abandonment by Father Healing in process

We usually pick a spouse that resembles the parent/caretaker we have the most

unresolved/pain issues from. Harville Hendrix

Family Burdens vs Heirlooms Burdens Heirlooms

Divorce-Infidelity

Anxiety - tension

Temper/Anger/Hostility

Poverty

Health Conditions

Depression

Addiction

Insecurity/Low self-

Recipes-Food Humor Stories

Intelligence-Wisdom Faith Love

Non- Judgment Giftings

We get to choose what we want to take on

Our True Inheritance

We are in the blood line of Jesus Christ!!

1 Peter 1:3-5Amplified Bible (AMP) 3 Blessed [gratefully praised and adored] be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant and boundless mercy has caused us to be born again [that is, to be reborn from above—spiritually transformed, renewed, and set apart for His purpose] to an ever-living hope and confident assurance through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 [born anew] into an inheritance which is imperishable [beyond the reach of change] and undefiled and unfading, reserved in heaven for you, 5 who are being protected and shielded by the power of God through your faith for salvation that is ready to be revealed [for you] in the last time.

Ephesians 1: 5-12 (Passion Version)

5-6 For it was always in his perfect plan to adopt us as his delightful children, through our union with Jesus, the Anointed One, so that his tremendous grace that cascades over us would bring him glory --for the same love he has for his Beloved One, Jesus, he has for us!

7 -8Since we are now joined to Christ, we have been given the treasures of salvation by his blood--the total cancellation of our sins--all because of the cascading riches of this grace. This superabundant grace is already powerfully working in us and flooding into every part of our being, releasing within us all forms of wisdom and practical understanding.

Ephesians 1: 5-12 (Passion Version) 9-10 And through the revelation of the Anointed One, he unveiled his secret desires to us--the hidden mystery of his long range plan, which he was delighted to implement from the very beginning of time. And this detailed plan will reign supreme through every period of time until the fulfillment of all ages finally reaches its climax-- when God makes all things new in all of heaven and earth through Jesus Christ.

11-12 This is why God selected and ordained us to be his own inheritance through our union with Christ! Before we were even born, he gave us our destiny; that we would fulfill the plan of God who accomplishes every purpose and plan in his heart. God’s purpose was that we Jews, who were the first to long for the messianic hope, would be the first to believe in him and bring great praise and glory to God!

John 14:12-14 (Passion)12 “I tell you this timeless truth: The person who follows me in faith, believing in me, will do the mighty miracles that I do--even greater miracles than these because I go to be with my Father! 13For I will do whatever you ask me to do when you ask in my name. And that is how the Son will show what the Father is really like and bring glory to him. 14Ask me anything in my name, and I will do it for you.

What can we do?Look at our own blood line and choose what we want to continue (Heirlooms verses burdens).

Pass down the Blessings to the next generation. Empowering people/loved ones with loving statements (I am proud of you, great job, I believe in you).

The measure of man’s character is not what he gets from his ancestors but what

he leaves his descendants