HOW TO MAINTAIN PEACE OF MIND

Many times we lose our mental peace as we deal with situations that trigger worry, sadness, desperation, fear, anger. A big contributor to modern day stress could be lack of job security, financial problems, and conflicts at work at home etc. In such situations it is easy to lose our metal balance and peace of mind. The following article gives us a few simple tips on how to maintain our peace of mind at all times.

Many times our problems are self created. We create problems for ourselves by interfering too often in other people’s lives and affairs. We do so because somehow we are convinced that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic, and those who do not conform to our viewpoints must be badgered and criticized into our way of thought. This type of thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created each one of us to be unique, therefore no two individuals can think or act in exactly the same way. All individuals act the way they do because their thoughts are molded by their own individual backgrounds and experience and the best way for us to maintain peace is to build tolerance towards another different point of view. In addition –Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.

Sometimes we also develop ill feelings towards a person who may have insulted or harmed us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, high blood pressure and other stress related symptoms. While the insult or injury to us has occurred once the nourishment of the grievance goes on forever. We constantly remember the incident and it keeps playing on our minds. Get over this habit. Stop the tape from being replayed over and over again. Forgive and forget and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving. This is the most powerful tool to peace of mind.

Another contributor to loss of peace of mind is our need for recognition and praise. Many times we do our duties or take an action with the expectation of praise and recognition for a deed well done, a sacrifice we made for someone else. If we do not get the recognition and praise we feel cheated of our dues and the recognition we should have got. Our suggestion is..Do your duties and execute your responsibilities without the expectation of any returns in the form of praise, appreciation and recognition. Simply do what you have to do because it is the right thing to do.

The biggest modern day contributor to stress is jealousy. Jealousy of our neighbor’s success, a colleagues promotion, academic success of a cousin or acquaintance. We all have experienced how this form of jealousy can blow our peace of mind. Sometimes we know that we worked harder than our colleagues in office and yet they get the promotion and the perks and we do not. Sometimes you may have started a business several years back and yet your neighbor who started a business only two years ago is experiencing great success! There are several examples in everyday life of this nature. Should you be jealous? Absolutely not ! Sometimes our current and our future is shaped by the sum total of our past karmas and sometimes therefore we may not really achieve the success we seek .The only way out of this situation is to try harder till you succeed, be the best at what you do at all times and your success should be measured in terms of your own efforts and the results of these efforts and not against other people’s efforts and their results. Focus on your own self. Do not blame others for your lack of success or your misfortune. We all build and our responsible for our own individual destiny, sometimes success can just take longer than we thought it should.

Stress and loss of peace of mind can occur when we resist change. We cannot try and change the environment around us single handedly, sometimes it may be best if we changed ourselves to suit

the environment. As we do this the environment around us which has so far been unfriendly will mysteriously change to become congenial and harmonious. Many times we face everyday inconveniences, ailments and irritations, accidents and situations that are beyond our control. Traffic jams, noise pollution, electrical failures, internet and phone service breakdowns, long queues and many such stress inducing situations. In situations where we can do nothing to control or change we must learn to put up with these situations. Learn to endure and work around them cheerfully!

It would also help us to remember the maxim “Do not bite off more than you can chew”. It is wise to know our limitations whilst taking on work. Take on only as much work as you can do justice to. Unfinished tasks or taking an over whelming amount of work leads to stress and mental tension. Many times we accept more work in order to please other people. Learn to say NO and take on only as much as you can accomplish well. Peace of mind is also gained by spending time in daily introspection and meditation. An uncluttered and organized mind will produce greater peace of mind.

Meditation is a known de-stressor. The act of meditation calms the mind and rids the mind of disturbing thoughts. If you can build the practice of daily meditation for half hour every day, your mind will not be as easily disturbed as before. Many of us think that we have no time in our daily schedules for half hour of meditation – but just a half hour of meditation everyday will help you focus much better for the rest of the 23.5 hours of the day and you will do your daily activities in a much more organized, effective and efficient manner.

An empty mind is a devils workshop. Keep yourself occupied and busy in the pursuit of worthwhile activities. Actively follow a hobby, learn something new every day in the pursuit of your hobby. Outside of your hobby build a sustained interest in activities that are beneficial to society. Commit to an NGO, an old age home an orphanage and spend some part of your day and week here. The selfless act of giving brings fulfillment like no other. Cultivate the habit of reading good books in your spare time. Good literature always helps mould good thinking, which in turn leads to good behavior and deeds. Mental chanting of God’s name, prayers, and hymns bring a sense of peace to the restless mind. Engage actively in all these pursuits and you will find a sense of calm that you did not have before!

Procrastination is a bad habit that leads to a lot of unwanted stress. Do not waste time wondering “should I or shouldn’t I”. As the Nike ad says – “Just do it”! Days, weeks and months get wasted in futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future events. Value your time and do the things that need to be done and do them today!

Do not spend time on regrets. Learn from your mistakes and focus on the future. You cannot change the past but you can control the direction of your future.

A famous poet once noted: “I believe that everything happens for a reason. People are forced to change so that they can learn to let go of events and situations. Things go wrong so that we can appreciate them more when they are going right. We suffer by believing in the lies and false statements made by others and in the process learn to trust no one but ourselves, and sometimes good things fall apart so that better things in the future may come together” .

Adapted from Akhand Jyoti- May –June 2012.