THEME – Day 6 copy

THEMETHEMEcopycopyDesign • Photography • Copy

Workbook pages 1-2

copy Theme

VOICEVOICEChoose the right voice and tone for

your theme.

copy Theme

• Your "voice" is the way that you "speak" on

paper. It is how your words come across to the

reader, and it will be different for every writer.

• Voice depends on the style you choose –

formal, informal, technical, chatty, poetic.

• Voice depends on the words you choose to

express this style - simple words, scientific

words, slang words.

copy ThemeVOICEVOICE

• Make the first sentence memorable.

• Write a sentence so good that the reader continues reading.

• Hint at what will follow.

copy ThemeThe 1The 1stst Sentence Sentence

“Call me Ishmael.”

—Herman Melville, Moby-Dick (1851)

• This account will be personal.

• The speaker directly addresses the audience.

• There is a biblical allusion.Ishmael was born at Mamre, when Abraham was 86, 11 years after Abraham's arrival in what would become the land of Israel (Genesis 16:3). He grew up to be a man of the desert wilderness, with a wild and hostile attitude toward people, exactly as God described him to his mother before he was born.

• There appears to be a clarification of identity.

copy Theme

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen.

—George Orwell, 1984 (1949)

Something is up.

Things aren’t quite right.

copy Theme

IF YOU REALLY WANT TO HEAR about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don't feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. —J. D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye (1951)

• First-person account.• It is very conversational in tone.• The speaker is cynical.

• The speaker knows what is expected, but he doesn’t have the inclination or energy to play the “game.”

copy Theme

Time is not a line but a dimension,like the dimensions of space.

—Margaret Atwood, Cat's Eye (1988)

• Very philosophical statement that causes the reader to ask, “What do you mean? Can you give me an example?”

• It is about simultaneous happenings.• It is not a day-by-day or month-by-month account.

• The material is organized around something other than time.

copy Theme

All this happened, more or less. —Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five (1969)

• This is not a reliable narrator.

• What would you think if someone asserted that “all this happened” and followed it with a disclaimer like “more or less”?

• What is he/she leaving out?

• What is he/she adding?

copy Theme

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness,it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity,it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness,it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair. —Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities (1859)

Now you try? What do you know about this novel?

copy Theme

Is the first line memorable?

Did you readily identify the song and the group?

Share some memorable 1st lines from current songs. (Make sure the lyrics are appropriate.)

NOW TRY SOME SONG LYRICS

copy Theme

“You Belong to Me “— Taylor Swift:

“Brown-Eyed Girl” — Van Morrison:

“Treasure” — Bruno Mars:

”

“Live Like You Were Dying” — Tim McGraw:  

“You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset”

“Hey, where did we go/days when the rains came?”

“Gimme your, gimme your, gimme your attention, baby.”

“He said I was in my early 40's,/With a lot of life before me”

“Time keeps on slippin' slippin' slippin into the future.

“Free Bird” — Lynard Skynard:

 “Fly Like an Eagle” — The Steve Miller Band:

“If I leave here tomorrow will you still remember me?

copy Theme

“Bohemian Rhapsody” — Queen:

“Good Vibrations” — The Beach Boys:

“Friends in Low Places” — Garth Brooks:

 “Hotel California” — The Eagles:

“Blitzkrieg Bop” — The Ramones:

“I Knew You Were Trouble” — Taylor Swift:

“Is this the real life? / Is this just fantasy?”

“I, I love the colorful clothes she wears / And the way the sunlight plays upon her hair”

“Blame it all on my roots, I showed up in boots and ruined your black-tie affair.”

“On a dark, desert highway/ Cool wind in my hair.”

"Hey, ho, let's go!"

“Once upon a time, a few mistakes ago.”

copy Theme

Share some memorable 1st lines from current songs. (Make sure the lyrics are appropriate.)

NOW TRY SOME SONG LYRICScopy Theme

Be specificBe specific

Be specificBe specific

Theme: Outside the box, Inside the boxTone: candid

From F. Scott Fitzgerald's story "The Crack-Up“

Seen in a Junk Yard. Dogs, chickens with few claws,

brass fittings, T's elbow, rust everywhere, bales of metal

1800 lbs., plumbing fixtures, bathtubs, sinks, water

pumps, wheels, Fordson tractor, acetylene lamps for

tractors, sewing machine, bell on dinghy, box of bolts (No.

1), van, stove, auto stuff (No. 2), army trucks, cast iron

body, hot dog stand, dinky engines, sprockets like watch

parts, hinge all taken apart on building side, motorcycle

radiators, George on the high army truck.

copy ThemeConsider listsConsider lists

Theme: splashTone: pride

Try a listTry a list

Theme: withoutTone: inquisitive

Keep it shortKeep it short

Theme: COLLECTIONSTone: assertive

Be a name dropperBe a name dropper

Theme: bit by bitTone: provocative

Be a name dropperBe a name dropper

Be a name dropperBe a name dropperBe a name Be a name dropperdropper

Theme: THINGS LEFT UNSAIDTone: thoughtful

Theme: I Go to JohnsonTone: authoritative

Try 1Try 1stst Person Person (multiple)

Theme: En RouteTone: conversational

Try a conversationTry a conversation

Theme: It All Adds UpTone: reliable

Try numbersTry numbers

This sentence has five words. This is five words, too.

Five word sentences are fine. But several together

become monotonous. Listen to what is happening.

The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones.

It's like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety.

copy ThemeVary the length of sentencesVary the length of sentences

Now listen. I vary the sentence length and I create music.

Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a

harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of

medium length. And sometimes when I am certain the

reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of

considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and

builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the

drums, the crash of the symbols, and sounds that say listen

to this; it is important.Gary Provost on the Rhythms of Sentence Length

copy ThemeVary the length of sentencesVary the length of sentences

Theme:amplifyTone: animated

Vary sentence lengthVary sentence length

          Remember the day I borrowed your brand new car,

and I dented it? I thought you'd kill me, but you didn't. d

remember the time I dragged you to the beach, and you

said it would rain, and it did? I thought you'd say, "I told

you so," but you didn't. Do you remember the time I flirted

with all the guys to make you jealous and you were? I

thought you'd leave me, but you didn't. Do you remember

the time I spilled strawberry pie all over your car rug? I

thought you'd hit me, but you didn't.

And remember the time I forgot to tell you that the dance

was formal, and you showed up in jeans. I thought you'd

drop me, but you didn't. Yes, there were lots of things you

didn't do. But you put up with me, and you loved me, and

you protected me. There were lots of things I wanted to

make up to you when you returned from Vietnam.

But you didn't.

-Leo Buscaglia

copy ThemeUse repetitionUse repetition

repetition

Theme: ‘bout timeTone: assertive

Experiment with:Experiment with:repetition

Use prepositional phrases as in

• "History will show that he walked away with _____with

_____and with _____.”

or

• "She walked down the _____through the _____ and across

the _____."

Experiment with:Experiment with:parrallel structure

Try parallel structureTry parallel structure

Consider an embedded messageConsider an embedded message

Theme: unforgettableTone:

Am I just a school?

I am senior square at lunch.

l am A-1O at test time.

I am Newman Field at kickoff.

I am the stage at curtain call.

Am l just a school?

I am six building sections A-F.

I am your teacher who helped you after school.

I am the step you broke your heel on at Homecoming.

I am what you have made me.

Am l just a school?

copy Theme(continued)11ststperson inanimate objectperson inanimate object

I am six feet of green separating you from a birdie.

I am the three-point line at the buzzer.

I am fourth and goal and no time-outs.

I am a 3-2 pitch with the bases loaded.

Am I just a game?

I am a grandma with a giant foam finger.

I am a watered-down cup of “The Thirst Quencher.”

I am two skinned knees and a bruised ego.

I am a double-fault at game point.

Am I just a game?

copy Theme(continued)11ststperson inanimate objectperson inanimate object

I am a high-stepping, prime time trip to the end zone.

I am Air Ball, the grim specter of basketball death.

I am the inappropriate word that was worth the red card.

I am “RAMS!” on the count of three.

Am I just a game?

Do you know the depth of defeat?

Have you scaled the peaks of victory?

Am I just a game?

Go deep.

Ace the serve.

Swing for the fences

Sink the long one

Then you’ll know, you can tell me

Am I just a game?

copy Theme(continued)11ststperson inanimate objectperson inanimate object

Do you remember your finest hour?

Do you remember your worst?

Maybe you don’t.

I do.

So, am I just a school?

Cheer wildly.

Slap on the Ram bumper sticker.

Paint your faces blue.

Make me proud.

Then tell me, am I just a school?

Well, am I, friend?

Am I?

(continued) copy Theme11ststperson inanimate objectperson inanimate object

AlliterationAlliterationAll last year, anytime we asked about the new ABC schedule, administrators gave us an artful answer, which left us anticipating academic agony.

But when the buildings closed for summer break,believers in this new set of ABCs broke the news that we’d be battling the books for an extra hour. Built into the new schedule was a seventh period to break the boundaries of boring academic basics.

Certainly, changes loomed ahead. Contact periodnow came at noon instead of the close of the day, and classes commenced an hour before the rooster crowed. Clearly, we were learning a new set of ABC’s.

copy Theme

OnomatopoeiaOnomatopoeia

Our four years of high school provide many opportunities to set out in various directions. Bay High has established many programs so we may become familiar with different areas. However, we are also given other alternatives. Everyone tries at least one direction, wherever it may lead. By trying a particular direction, we are able to develop an interest which may in turn lead to another area of interest, and eventually direct us where we are destined to go.

We may take part in many activities: music, athletics, jobs, clubs, school work, or just taking it easy. Many times these high school activities are group affairs, but actually we are individually pursuing our own personal interests. Most of us are not even near the end of our journey, and some of us have not yet begun. Difficulty in finding the place where we are headed should not discourage us. We will have to stop and do some serious thinking once in awhile when we have more than one path available; and we may follow only one.

High school is just one of the legs in our journey to find out where we should be headed. At the end of the year, we will continue our search in other directions. Each one of us in his own way will explore the new dimensions discovered this year together.

… How Often I saw Where I should be going,Only By Setting Out For Somewhere Else.

copy ThemeAWFUL THEME COPYAWFUL THEME COPY

INDEFINITE ADJECTIVES

NOT SPECIFIC

TOO PHILOSOPHICAL

NO ONE WILL READ IT!

What is your theme’s tone?

What voice will work with the tone?

What format will you use?

Brainstorm. Write a 1st draft. Read it to staff members and have them offer suggestions.

Rewrite until it works.

copy ThemeYOUR TURNYOUR TURN