What To Say: To Build Relationships
Mitchell W. Manning, Sr.
What To Say:To Build Relationships
How to use this presentation
1. Review the presentation
2. List key points and questions
3. Discuss with others
4. Decide your next steps
Relationship Development
Design Execute Monitor/Control
Design – determine what is really importantExecute – translate into learning and doingMonitor/Control – translate into performanceContinuous Improvement – Feedback Loop
Continuous Improvement
Keys to Relationships
• Behavioral Skills are the true keys– Presenting Yourself– Managing Information– Presenting Your Ideas– Acquiring and Transferring Knowledge and Skills– Conflict Resolution– Questioning Decisions and Actions
Presenting Yourself
• My job is…• This is what I’m good at…• This is how I work best…• These are my values…(I value/believe…)• This is the contribution I plan to make…• These are the results I expect to deliver…• This is how I expect to be held accountable…
Process for Presenting Your SelfWrite your success stories for sharing using this outline...
• The situation (or task assignment)• Your observation• Your decision• Your action• The result of your action• How I feel about…• What I learned,,,
Managing InformationBecome expert at processing information.
Question Process to Use
What’s happening? Situation Appraisal
What’s wrong? Problem Solving
What are the options? Decision Making
What can go wrong? Potential Problem Analysis
What can be improved? Potential Opportunity Analysis
Situation AppraisalWhat’s happening?
• Identify Concerns
• Set Priority
• Plan Next Steps
• Plan Involvement
Managing InformationBecome expert at processing information.
Problem AnalysisWhat’s Wrong?
• Describe Problem
• Identify Possible Causes
• Evaluate Possible Causes
• Confirm True Cause
Managing InformationBecome expert at processing information.
Decision AnalysisWhat are the options?
• Clarify Purpose
• Identify Options
• Evaluate Each Option
• Assess Risks
• Make Decision
Managing InformationBecome expert at processing information.
Potential Problem AnalysisWhat can go wrong?
• Identify Potential Problems
• Identify Likely Causes
• Take Preventive Action
• Plan Contingent Action
Managing InformationBecome expert at processing information.
Potential Opportunity AnalysisWhat can be improved?
• Identify Potential Opportunity
• Identify Likely Causes
• Take Promoting Action
• Plan Optimizing Action
Managing InformationBecome expert at processing information.
Presenting Your IdeasBecome expert using SOPPADA to present your ideas.
Subject – I want to tell you about...
Objective – This is why...
Present Situation – This is how it is...
Proposal – This is how it can be...
Advantages (top 3) – These are the benefits...
Disadvantages (top 2) – These are negatives...
Action – This is how to do it...
Acquiring and Transferring Knowledge and Skills: Tell -
• What (in under 30 seconds)• Why (in under 90 seconds)• How (action planning)• Example• Application• Evaluation (project management)• Summary and Next Steps
Addressing Performance Issues:Evaluating Others
• Agreement
• Plan
• Process
Conflict Resolution Process:become expert at observing, orienting, deciding and
acting to resolve conflict
Observe
Orient
Decide
Act
The Origin of ConflictIdentify the origin of conflict before attempting to resolve.
Values
Facts
Methods
Objectives
Behavioral Choices for ConflictLearn to use the best choice to resolve conflict.
Collaborate
Confront
Compete
Avoid
Work Behavior ConflictLearn to address the origin of work conflict.
Shared Goals and ValuesHigh
High
Sen
se o
f C
ontr
ol
an
d A
ccou
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Low
Low
Stakeholder Conflict
Balance SynergyLeverage
Company & Shareholders - Profitability - Growth - Reputation
Employee Groups-Equity-Consistency-Teamwork and Collaboration
Individuals- Trust- Security- Fairness- Recognition- Contribution- Growth- Pay & Benefits
Customers- Price/ Value- Service- New Products- Quality
Conflicts from the Hierarchy of Decision-Making
Management•Systems and Processes•Major Impact/ Buy-In
Executive•Direction•Goals•Critical/Sensitive
Individual Employees•Functions and Tasks•Routine/ Operational
Conflict Intervention
Meet with the stakeholderDescribe what they did
Tell them why it is important
Ask them how they feel
Ask them what they will do differently
Confirm their commitment to change
Agree on a schedule for follow-up
Thank them for their commitment
Conflict PreventionShare thoughts, feelings, and rationaleMaintain and enhance self-esteem Listen and respond with empathyClarify and Agree to Next Actions
Questioning Decisions and Actions
1. Why are you doing this? making this commitment?
2. What are your objectives and desired outcomes? intentions?
3. How will you know it has been successful?
4. What have you done to prepare?
5. What can happen? worst case/best case/most likely case?
6. How do you plan to make it work? keep it working?
7. How important is it to you to be successful?
Things you can shareand learn to build relationships:
Interests
Skills/Abilities
Values
Personality attributes
Desired lifestyle
Needs & wants
Experiences
Vocation
Professionalism and Relations:Let professionalism be your calling card and signature.
• Decide what it means to you • Examples of professional behavior
– Arrive at work on time
– Dress appropriately
– Stay current in the field
– Accept responsibility for mistakes
– Complete tasks on time
– Respect organizational norms
– Keep personal business out of the office
– Avoid gossip and the grapevine
Conclusion
I hope you can put What to Say to immediate use to build relationships. Hopefully, my thoughts,
andyour attention, have stimulated your thinking,confirmed your experiences, and given you newideas for building important relationships.
Best Wishes,Mitch Manning [email protected]