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TheCrypticLanguageofNon-VerbalCommunicationScientistsarestartingtodecipherthethingswedon’tsaywithwords
RobertRoyBritt Follow
Jun25·13minread
Photo:SciencePhotoLibrary/GettyImages
ravelingthroughtheAtlantaAirportrecentlyduringaperiodofheavy
delays,PattiWoodcouldseethepainandstressetchedontravelers’
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bedraggledfaces.Anybodycould.Youdidn’tneedtobeanexpertinbody
languagetopickupthecues.Peoplewereleaningononeanother,slouchingintheir
seats,orwalkingslowlyasifthroughwaterwithphased-outzombie-likestares.But
Woodisanexpert,authorofsevenbooksoncommunication,includingSNAP—Making
theMostofFirstImpressions,BodyLanguage,andCharisma.Soshedidwhatshe’s
compelledtodoinsuchsituations,shestoppedandspokewithsomeofthem.
“WhatIcoulddoreasonablyissitwithafewpeopleandlistentotheirpain,”she
explains.“Becauselisteningdeeplyinvolveswatchingandlisteningforcues.Whenyou
listendeeplyandsomeonefeelsheardandunderstood,itlightenstheirload,andthey
maynothavetokeepgivingoutthemessageverballyandnonverbally,‘Iaminpain!’”
ButasWoodandanyoneelsewhostudiesbodylanguageseriouslywilltellyou,it’s
rarelysoeasytoreadpeople.
Thescienceoffacialexpressionsandbodylanguageisincrediblycomplex,ever-evolving,
andriddledwithmyths.Amongthefewcertaintiesisthatthenonverbalcuesyougive
offcanpackmanydifferentmeaningstodifferentpeople,andyoucan’tfullypredicthow
yourlittlequirkswillbeperceived—whetherbycoworkers,acquaintances,orstrangers,
orevenhorses.
Amongthebiggestmistakeswemakewhentryingtoreadsomeone’sbodylanguage:
“Wethinkit’sallaboutus,”saysWood,whospeakstoandconsultswithFortune500
companiestoimprovetheirsalesandleadershipwithnonverbalcommunication,and
hasappearedonjustaboutanypopularTVtalkshowyoucanthinkof.
“Nonverbalcommunicationisalanguage,it’saverycomplexlanguage,andjustlikeanylanguagethecues,likewords,canmeanmorethanonething.”
“Peoplereadsomeone’sbodylanguageandassumetheyare,say,standingfarawayand
leaningback,frowning,withtheirfeetturnedawayfromyoubecausetheydon’tlike
you,”Woodexplains.“Themostlikelymotivationfromsomeone’sbodylanguageiswhat
isgoingonwiththem,soyourfirstlevelofinterpretationshouldbe,‘Iwonderwhat’s
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goingonwiththemthattheywouldhavethesecues.’”Next,considerthesituation,the
environmentandwhatever’sbeingdiscussed,shesuggests.Couldbeyou’vebroughtupa
topicthat,unbeknownsttoyou,strikesdeepintheirheart.Onlythenshouldyouwonder
ifyouforgottobrushyourteethorifyou’velostyoursocialmojo.
Allthewhile,keepthisinmind:“Theothermisconceptionisthatweareallthesame,so
everycuemeansthesamethingforeveryperson,”Woodsays.“Nonverbal
communicationisalanguage,it’saverycomplexlanguage,andjustlikeanylanguage,
thecues,likewords,canmeanmorethanonething.”
Still,there’sasignificantbodyofsciencetoprovideinsightintowhatnonverbalcues
mostoftenmeanand,moreimportantly,howthey’relikelytobeperceived.
. . .
Inanewstudy,peoplelookedatpicturesoffaceswithneutralexpressions.Onewas
head-on,onehada10-degreeupwardtilt,andonehada10-degreedownwardtilt.The
peoplewereaskedtoratetheiragreementwithstatementslike“thispersonwouldenjoy
havingcontroloverothers”and“thispersonwouldbewillingtouseaggressivetacticsto
gettheirway.”
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Peopleratedtheirperceptionsofthedi�erentheadtiltsofrealpeopleinthesephotosaswellastheavatar
atthetop.Credit:Witkower&Tracy,PsychologicalScience
Whentheheadwastilteddown,76%ofpeoplesaidthepersonlookedmoredominant.
Bycoveringtheeyesandeyebrowsinoneviewing,thencoveringeverythingelsein
another,theresearchersisolatedwhy.
“Thattiltingone’sheaddownwardleadstotheartificialappearanceofloweredandV-
shapedeyebrows—whichinturnelicitperceptionsofaggression,intimidation,and
dominance,”theyexplaininthejournalPsychologicalScience.
“Whenpeoplewerelookingatonlytheeyesandeyebrows,thedownwardsheadtiltwas
ratedasa5.3onperceiveddominanceusinga7-pointratingscale,whereastheneutral
headanglewasratedasa3.7,”explainsoneoftheresearchers,ZacharyWitkoweratthe
UniversityofBritishColumbia.“Whenparticipantswereshownotherpartsoftheface,
headtilthadnoeffectonperceiveddominance.”
TheresearchwasacollaborationbetweenWitkowerandJessicaTracy,alsoatthe
UniversityofBritishColumbia.
“Thesefindingssuggestthat‘neutral’facescanstillbequitecommunicative,”theywrite.
“Subtleshiftsoftheheadcanhaveprofoundeffectsonsocialperception,partlybecause
theycanhavelargeeffectsontheappearanceoftheface.”
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Therewereother,secondaryinterpretations.
“Peoplewhotiltedtheirheaddownwerealsoperceivedasbeingcoldandinfluential,”
Witkowersaysbyemail.And,headds:“Insomeemergingwork,weshowthatpeople
tiltingtheirheadupareperceivedasprestigious,competent,andproud.”
InaseparatestudypublishedearlierthisyearintheJournalofPersonalityandSocial
Psychology,thesametworesearchers,alongwithotherscientists,usedsimilar
techniquestouncoverotherbehaviorsthatwereperceivedasdominant,includingthe
lackofasmileaswellas“bodilyexpansiveness,”ortakingupspacewiththearmsspread
awayfromthebody.
Whetherdominanceisagoodorbadthingdependsonhowyoulookatit.The
perceptionofdominanceandprestige(orinfluence)canallowpotentialleaderstoattain
andthenretaintheirrank,thethinkinggoes.Therestofuscanbenefitfromatleast
beingawareofhowourbodylanguagemightelevateourstandingormerelymuddleour
intendedmessages.
Theupshot,Witkowersays:“Anupwardsheadtilt,smile,andanexpandedchestcan
communicateprestige—definedasthedemonstrationofknowledgeandexpertisefor
earnedrespect.”
. . .
Facialexpressionsarejustonewaywegivenonverbalcluestoourintentionsor
emotionalstate,consciouslyorotherwise,Witkowerandothersarecleartonote.And
thosecluesarerarelydefinitive.Shiftyeyesoranavertedgazeareoftensaidtobedead
giveawaysthatsomeoneislying,forexample.Notso,severalexpertsagree.Infact,
there’snoperfectcluefordeception,arguesBellaDePaulo,authorofThePsychologyof
LyingandDetectingLies.
“Thereisnobehaviorthatalwaysoccurswhenpeoplearelyingandneveroccursatother
times,”DePaulohassaid.“Thedeadgiveawayneverdidexistandneverwill.”
Thefalsenotionthatpeoplecouldbereadsoeasily,alreadyingrainedinthepopular
culturefordecades,waselevatedbythepopularTVshowLietoMe,whichranfrom
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2009to2011.ThefictionalDr.CalLightman(TimRoth)usedhisamazingface-reading
abilitiestobustthebadguysandcarryoutsomedeceptionofhisown.
Lightman’ssleuthingskillswerelooselybasedonthereal-liferesearcherPaulEkman,a
pioneerinfacial-expressionresearchwhoretiredfromtheUniversityofCalifornia,San
Franciscoin2004.Now80,Ekmanstudied,inparticular,involuntarymicro-expressions,
tinyfacialticsthatgiveaway,well…that’snotalwaysclear.
Onhisownwebsite,Ekmanalsocommentedontheshowepisode-by-episode,not
critiquing,butrevealinginthefollowingexamplesjusthowcomplexandconvolutedthe
scienceoffacialrecognitioncanbe:
“Peoplelookawaywhentheyarethinkingcarefullyandconsideringeachwordbeforeit
isspoken,notjustwhentheyaremakingitup,”EkmanwritesofSeason1,Episode1.
And:“Obliqueeyebrowsareaveryreliablesignofsadness.Veryfewpeoplecanmake
thismovementvoluntarily,soitisvirtuallyneverfaked.Andfewpeoplecanpreventitif
theyfeelsad.”
OfSeason3,Episode4,hewrites:“Fearisregisteredinmanypartsoftheface:Thelips
stretchedhorizontally,theeyebrowsraisedandpulledtogether,butthemostobvious
signisthewide-openeyes,verywide,upperlidspulledupandlowerlidstensed.Itis
unmistakable,butitisthepartofthefearexpressionthatismosteasilyfaked;itisnot
hardtododeliberately.”
It’sawonderCalLightmancouldferretoutanyone’ssecretsorintentions.Andinfact,
theshowledtohundredsofsupposedrealexpertsteachingtheartofdeception
detection,“ignoringortwistingwhatscienceactuallysupportedandunfortunately
furthermucking-upthefieldwithsimplisticassertions,”saysFormerFBIagentJoe
Navarro,whousedthescienceofnon-verbalcommunicationtohelpwith
counterintelligenceeffortsfor25years.HeistheauthorofTheDictionaryofBody
Language:AFieldGuidetoWhatEveryBodyisSaying.
“Thereisnosinglebehaviorindicativeofdeception,”Navarrowritesonhisblog,adding:
“Wehumansarenobetterthanacointossatdetectingdeception—amere50–50
chance.”
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Navarro’sresearched216casesofDNAexoneratingpeoplewhowereondeathrow.
Noneoftheconvictionswerebasedonanybodilyfluids—frombloodtosaliva—found
atthecrimescene.
“Ineachandeveryinstance,thelawenforcementofficersweresurethesuspectwas
lying,butnotoneofficercoulddetectthetruth,”hewrites.“Andthatisonewayyou
windupwiththeinnocentondeathrow.”
. . .
Researchofnon-verbalcommunicationisn’tjustforthesakeofscience,ortelevision,or
evencatchingcriminals.Itcanhelpusunderstandourselves.
PrincetonUniversitypsychologyprofessorAlexanderTodorovstudieshowweuseother
individuals’facialexpressions,bodylanguage,andothercuestoevaluateandmake
senseofourworld.HisbookFaceValue,forexample,explainshowinamere10thofa
seconduponseeinganewface,wetendtodecideifthepersonisattractive,trustworthy,
andcompetent,amongothertraits.
Inonestudy,Todorovandcolleaguesshowedpeoplepicturesofotherpeople
experiencingextremeemotions,suchasgreatloss,painorvictory.Thepictured
emotionsweremoreaccuratelyguessedwhenpeoplebasedtheirdecisionsonbody
languagealone,orbodylanguageandfacialexpressions,comparedtowhentheyrelied
onjustfacialexpressions.Forexample,atennisplayerwouldhaveafreehandclenched
inafistafterwinningapoint,butnotafterlosing,Todorovexplains.
However,whenaskedhowtheyarrivedattheirguesses,mostofthepeoplesaidthe
facesgaveitaway.Thatsuggestspeoplecan’ttellthedifferencebetweenextreme
positiveandnegativeemotionsbasedonfacialexpressions,Todorovsays,“although
theythinktheycan.”
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Thisisoneoftheimagesetsusedinthestudy.Whichfacesbelongtoathleteswhojusthadasweetvictory
oracrushingdefeat?Jotyourguessesdown,thenseetheanswersbelow.Credit:ScienceJournal
Thestudy,publishedinthejournalSciencein2012,“counterspopulartheoriesholding
thatfacialexpressionsareuniversallyconsistentindicatorsofemotion,”accordingto
Todorovandhiscolleagues.
Quizanswers:
Losers:1,4,6
Winners:2,3,5
TodorovsaysthenewstudybyWitkowerandTracyisvalidinthecontextofratingor
evaluatingisolatedfacialimages.Buthesetsahighbarforresearchthatmightyield
broaderconclusions:“Oneneedstodoasetofstudiesmanipulatingbodyshapesand
gesturestofindoutwhetherthesefacialcuescanbeoverwrittenbybodilycues.”
“Thegreatestmythisthatfacialexpressionsprovidecompletelyunambiguous
informationabouttheemotionalstateoftheperson,”hesaysinanemail.“Reallife
expressionsareinherentlyambiguous.Ofcourse,thisistrueforbodygestures,too.
[But]werarelyexperiencetheambiguity,becausewerapidlyintegratemultiplecuesin
thecontextofthespecificsituation.”
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Psychologistsalsopointoutthatagivenexpressionorgesturecanmeansignificantly
differentthingscomingfromdifferentpeople,orevenjustinvaryingsituations.
Takethecrossingofthearms,forexample.
Thecommonwisdomholdsthatapersonwhodoesthisisstandoffish,blockingout
others.Butjustcheckoutanybouncer.Crossedarmsareawaytosignalpower,Navarro
says.Copsdoit.SodoesSuperman.“Aswithmanyprimatebehaviorsthatmakeuslook
larger,thisdoescommunicatethatthereareissueshereandIambigenoughtohandle
them,”NavarrowritesatPsychologyToday.
Butcrossedarmscanalsosignalinsecurity,fearorfrustration,amongmanyother
things.The“selfhug,”asNavarrocallsit,cansimplybeawaytocomfortourselves,
whetherinacrowdorwhilewaitingforsomething.Orjustbecauseit’scold.Oritcanbe
aformofstressrelease(infact,peoplewillsometimesmassagetheirownarmswhilein
thisposition,henotes).
Thisisexactlywhytryingtoreadpeopleisfraughtwithchallenges.
“Don’ttakeonebody-languagecueanddecideyou‘know’whatanotherpersonistrying
tocommunicate,”Woodwritesinoneofherbooks,SuccessSignals.“Youmustreadthe
wholeperson.”
Nonverbalcuestypicallycomeinclusters,sheexplains,“agroupofmovements,
postures,andgesturesthatshouldhaveroughlythesamemeaningoradduptothesame
meaning.”Thinkofasinglecueasawordinasentence,shesuggests.Aspowerfulasthe
word“love”is,youwouldnotknowthemeaningofasentencejustbyreadingthatone
word.Andhere’swhereWoodofferssomeadvice:Ifyouwanttobewellunderstood,
makesureyourgesturesarecongruent.
“Ifyousay‘Ireallyloveyou,’butyou’returnedawayandyoureyesareontheTVscreen,
youareincongruent,”shewrites.
. . .
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Whatcausedhumanstobesouniquelyandsupremelyexpressiveinsuchcomplex,often
inexplicableways?
Tostartwith,ourspecieshasincrediblyexpressiveeyesandeyebrowscomparedtoother
animals.Thatpartofthehumanfaceisnottheonlykeytomuchofournonverbal
communication,itmayhaveevolvedforthatpurposeandhelpedusbecomewhoweare,
accordingtoareviewofstudiespublishedearlierthisyearinthejournalNatureEcology
andEvolution.
Thehumanfaceisshorterandlessbulkythanthoseofourancientancestors.With
smoothermodernforeheadsandwigglyeyebrows,thethinkinggoes,earlyhumans
couldgetbeyondexhibitingthecrudestofemotions,likeanger,andbegintoexpress
moresocial-orientedemotionslikesympathyandtherecognitionofothers.
“Wecannowuseourfacestosignalmorethan20differentcategoriesofemotionviathe
contractionorrelaxationofmuscles,”saidstudyteammemberPaulO’Higgins,professor
ofanatomyattheUniversityofYork.“It’sunlikelythatourearlyhumanancestorshad
thesamefacialdexterityastheoverallshapeofthefaceandthepositionsofthemuscles
weredifferent.”
Thesechangesalongwithotherevolutionaryshiftsallowed“moreopportunitiesfor
gestureandnonverbalcommunication—vitalskillsforestablishingthelargesocial
networkswhicharebelievedtohavehelpedHomosapienstosurvive,”O’Higginsandhis
colleagueswrite.
Humansalsoevolvedtohaveafargreatervarietyoffacialexpressionsthanmostother
animals.Whileothercreaturesrelyonsoundsorbuttsniffingtorecognizeoneanother,
forus,theeyesgenerallyhaveit.
“Humansarephenomenallygoodatrecognizingfaces;thereisapartofthebrain
specializedforthat,”explainsMichaelSheehan,aresearcheratUCBerkeley’sMuseum
ofVertebrateZoology.Ina2014studypublishedinthejournalNatureCommunications,
Sheehanandhiscolleaguesexplainhowtheevolutionofourvisualskillswaslikelytied
totheevolvingsocialinteractionthatmadeushuman.
“Ourstudynowshowsthathumanshavebeenselectedtobeuniqueandeasily
recognizable,”Sheehansays.Itisclearlybeneficialformetorecognizeothers,butalso
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beneficialformetoberecognizable.Otherwise,wewouldalllookmoresimilar.”
. . .
Researchevensuggestshumanbodylanguagehasmeaningthatextendsbeyondour
species.
Whenhorseslookedatpicturesofangryhumanfaces,theirheartratesrose,according
toa2016studyinthejournalBiologyLetters.Ahorsewouldalsoturnitsheadtolookat
thephotoswithitslefteye,asignitfeelsthreatened.Signalsfromthelefteyeare
processedintherighthemisphereofthebrain,specializedfordealingwiththreats,
explainsUniversityofSussexresearcherAmySmith,co-authorofthestudy.
“Itshowsthathorseshavetheabilitytoreademotionsacrossthespeciesbarrier,”Smith
says.“Wehaveknownforalongtimethathorsesareasociallysophisticatedspecies,but
thisisthefirsttimewehaveseenthattheycandistinguishbetweenpositiveand
negativehumanfacialexpressions.”
Ina2017studypublishedinAnimalCognition,Smithandotherresearchersfound
horsesweremorelikelytoapproachatrainerwhowasinasubmissivepositionthanone
inadominantposition.
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Horsesfoundthepersonontherightmoreapproachable.Image:UniversityofSussex
“Evolutionarilyspeaking,animals—includinghumans—tendtouselargerposturesto
indicatedominanceorthreat,andsmallerposturestoindicatesubmissiveness,”said
LeanneProops,aco-authorofthestudyfromtheUniversityofPortsmouth.“Horses
may,therefore,haveaninstinctualunderstandingoflargervs.smallerpostures.”
. . .
Perhapsyou’renottooconcernedaboutwhatothermammalsthinkaboutyou.But
havingalittlehorsesenseabouthowbodylanguagemightbeinterpretedcangiveyoua
legupintheofficeorinothersocialsituations.
Recentresearchindicatesthatafirmhandshake,eyecontactandanexpansiveposture
—armsandlegsout—projectconfidence,whetheryouactuallyhaveitornot.Peter
Belmi,aUniversityofVirginiaresearcherwhostudiesthebenefitsofunjustified
confidence,offersthisadviceforboostingperceivedconfidence:“Whenyouspeak,take
yourtime.Becalmandrelaxed.Useafactualvocaltone.Avoidhedging.Dresswell.Use
yourbodytotakeupspace.”
Inaphoneinterview,Wood,theauthor,offeredthesetipstohelpanyoneproject
confidence,competence,andemotionalengagementwhenmeetingsomeonenewor
havinganyimportantconversation:
Showyourheart.Physicallyturnittowardthepersonyou’respeakingwith.“Itmakes
youlookbrave…confidentandconnected,”shesays.
Watchyourfeet.“Thefeetarethemosthonestpartofthebody.Ifyou’renotconfident,
youtendtoturnthemaway,towardtheexit.”
Wood’snumberonesuggestionisamodernone:Putyourphoneaway.Ifit’sout,you
can’thelpbutlookatit,providingadistractionthatreducesthehumanconnectionand
erodestheotherperson’sconfidenceinyou.Movingthephoneoutofsight“willhavea
profoundimpact,”shesays.