Words do hurt!(An Essay about Bullying)
Hello, my name is Sarah Brown. I am 36 years old and have four
children, whom I love more than anything in the world. To this day,
I teach my kids that bullying is wrong. I tell them exactly how
badly words can hurt people. I try to prevent my kids from
getting bullied, as well as preventing them from becoming bullies.
I am very strict about it. The reason why is because I know what it
is like. I myself was bullied, so badly that I did often think
about
quiting school, or taking an even worse way out. (we all know
what I mean)
In kindergarten I was diagnosed with ADHD and placed on
medication, by second grade I was in special ed. It wasnt till 5th
grade that I was allowed back into a regular public school, but
by
then my reputation had been set. Kids started by calling me
names like Retard, Moron, Ugly, Stupid, and Freak. (there are worse
names, but I will be polite) Grease Monkey was my favorite, kids
would scream it at me down the hallway. By the time I got
into high school the names had gotten worse,Whore, Skank, Witch,
Dog face, and Crab shack, were only a few names that they used. By
10th grade the names turned into physical attacks.
One girl punched me in the head simply for glancing at her in
the hallway. A guy I liked thought it would be funny to announce
that I liked him in front of everyone in the hallway and begin
throwing
dry dog food at me as a way of telling me what he thought of me
liking him. Another boy placed a dogs chew bone on my lunch tray
when I got up to use the bath room. I threw it in the trash as I
listened to them laugh their heads o at me when I found it.
11th grade they had begun making crude comments when ever I
would stand in front of the class to read a report that I had
done
for homework. They would point, laugh, and whisper to each other
as I tried to speak. (I was always told that I have a beautiful
singing voice, but am now afraid to sing, speak, or even stand
in front of a crowd.) Kids would try to trip me when I walked into
a class room, and laugh if I fell. (especially if i received an
injury
from it) I have had kids spit in my face, simply because they
didnt like how I dressed or what I looked like. That year I almost
quit school because I couldnt take it any more. I was tired of
going home and crying into my pillow after school. I could cry
in
front of any one for fear of more bullying. so i held it till I
got home. I always lied to my mom about what was wrong, I couldnt
risk telling her that I didnt want to live any more because
kids
were telling me to go home and shoot my self. That I was too
stupid and ugly to live. this lasted until I nally graduated high
school. At graduation and kid gave himself one last laugh by
tripping me as I walked across the stage to except my diploma.
Had the entire audience laughing. It was a riot, :( I still
remember 11th grade when I was voted the ugliest girl in school.
They chose I guy I thought was cute to hand me the award.
Anyway, this is what I mean by, words do hurt. I was diagnosed
with a minor case of PDSD from these experiences. To this day I
cannot walk into a grocery store alone because the crowds of
people. which is why I often have to bring one or all of my
children with me when I go shopping. If a store is very
crowded,
Forget about me even going in. I will send their father to the
store. Needless to say, I dont go very far on black Friday. I do
Christmas shopping, but I have to scale stores to see which are the
least crowded. I usually will go to only one store and leave as
quickly as I can.
If I see two people whispering to each other in front of me, I
will
have ash backs of the kids whispering in school. I am also on
Social Security, because I have a hard time holding jobs, because
of the whole crowd thing. I have anxiety and depression. I
still
look in the mirror every day and remember being called ugly, and
sometimes its hard not to agree with them, Even now.
So the next time you think about calling someone a name, or
trying to hurt someone. Remember this. There are 4,000 suicide a
year, because of bullying. I could have been one of them.
