20 June/July 2013

If you have a question for the attorney, please email it to asnider@cbyrdslaw.com. While all of the questions submitted cannot be answered in this article, I will personally respond by email to your inquiry.

What Are the Laws Regarding Divorce in Tennessee?

yourspousecannotagreeonaparentingplan,youmustfirstgotomediation and try to agree on a parenting plan before you have a trial.

Can my child choose which parent to live with?No. Contrary to popular belief, there is no “magic age” at which a child can choose which parent to live with. Otherwise, the child would suffer because the parents could unfairly pressure and influencethechild.InTennessee,thecourtwillmakechildcustodydecisions based upon several factors that are used to determine the best interest of the child.

What is the difference between marital property and separate property?In Tennessee, assets and debts acquired during a marriage are called “marital property” and are divided equitably in a divorce. Marital property includes all jointly owned property acquired by either or both spouses during the marriage. “Separate property” is property owned prior to the marriage or property that was inherited or received as a gift. Separate property is retained by the owning spouse.

How does the court determine “equitable” property division?In deciding how to divide the property owned by divorcing couples, judges will consider a number of factors, including:

uLength of the marriage u Age, physical and mental health, vocational skills, employability,earningcapacity,estate,financialliabilities andfinancialneedsofeachspouse u Contribution by one spouse to the education, training or increased earning power of the other spouse u Relative ability of each spouse for future acquisitions of capital assets and income u Contribution of each spouse to the acquisition, preservation, appreciation, depreciation or dissipation of the marital or separate property, including the contribution of a party to the marriage as homemaker, wage earner or parent, with the contribution of a party as homemaker or wage earner to be given the same weight if eachpartyhasfulfilleditsrole u Value of the separate property u Estate of each spouse at the time of the marriage u Economic circumstances of each spouse at the time the division of property is to become effective u Tax consequences to each spouse u Amountofsocialsecuritybenefitsavailabletoeachspouse

It is important to collect all the information you can about all your property, including when you purchased it, approximately how much it is worth, and details such as account numbers, serial numbers and so forth.

Angela is married to Karl Snider, and they are the proud parents of Kaylee (age 10) and Cole (age 4). Angela and her family attend Fellowship Bible Church, and they love to spend time outdoors on their farm. Angela also serves as fundraising chairperson for the Sam Bomar Memorial Scholarship Fund. For more information about this Fund, please go to www.sambomar.com.

What is the residency requirement for filing a divorce in Tennessee?You or your spouse must be a resident of Tennessee for at least six months in order to file for divorce. The legal divorce process beginswhenonespousefilesacomplaintfordivorce.Thedivorcepapersmustbefiledinacountywhereeitheryouoryourspouseresides.

What is a no-fault divorce?Tennessee has both no-fault and fault divorces. For a no-fault divorce, there only needs to be a statement that there are irreconcilable differences. However, you and your spouse must be in agreement about child custody, child support, division of the property and division of any debt. In an irreconcilable differences divorce there is a waiting period of 60daysfromthedatethatthedivorcecomplaintwasfiled(90daysifthere are minor children).

What is the parenting class requirement?If you and your spouse have children, you must each go to a parenting classandsubmitacertificateofcompletiontothedivorcecourt.

What is a Permanent Parenting Plan?A Permanent Parenting Plan is a detailed, written outline that provides for the best interests of the minor children. Ideally, the plan should contemplate all parenting decisions that should be made until the child reaches the age of majority. Parenting plans include an allocation of parenting responsibilities, the establishment of a residential schedule, and an allocation of child support. The residential schedule outlines when the children are in each parent’s physical care and designates the primary residential parent. The residential schedule also states the details concerning in which parent’s home the children shall reside on given days of the year, including provisions for holidays, birthdays of family members, vacations, and other special occasions. If you and

June/July 2013 21

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Mermaid TailCutting board1 large oblong seeded or

seedless watermelonKitchen knife and paring knifeLarge bowl and spoon

or scoopGreen dry erase markerChannel knifeDowels and toothpicksOptional decorations (found at any craft store): Edible turquoise

shimmer powder/disco dust, mermaid cookie cutters, light blue or turquoise fabric or mermaid decorations.

1. Wash watermelon under cool running water and pat dry. 2. On cutting board, place watermelon on its side and cut off 4 inches from one

end of watermelon to provide a sturdy base. Cut remaining watermelon in half lengthwise.

3. Hollow out both halves of the watermelon with spoon or scoop, reserving water-melon pieces to dice up for serving or cutting out mermaid shapes.

4. Use dry erase marker to trace mermaid tail freehand lengthwise across one entire half. With knife of your choice, carefully trim away to form the outline of mermaid tail. Use the channel knife to form scales and details.

5. For added detail, brush on edible turquoise shimmer powder/disco dust (purchased at cake decorating store or craft store).

6. Use pencil-sized dowels to secure the mermaid tail to top of base. Decorate with watermelon cubes or mermaid watermelon cutouts and serve.

If using the mermaid watermelon cutouts as topper for cupcakes, as shown, add watermelon cutout with toothpick or small dowel first and then ice around it.

Watermelon Sandwich WrapsTortillas: Wheat, flour, corn, spinach orsun-dried tomato Spreads: Chive cream cheese, hummus, guaca mole, Greek yogurt Meats: Turkey, ham, chicken breast, roast beef or pepperoni Sauces (marinades and salad dressings): BBQ, ranch, pesto, Thai peanut sauce, teriyaki, gingerCheeses: Feta, pepper Jack, mozzarella Veggies and other toppings: Watercress, olives, scallions, cilantro, romaine, jalapenos, fresh mint, basil, shredded carrots, spinach, sprouts and cucumber slices1 watermelon spear: about 1/2 inch thick, 1 inch wide and as long as your tortillaCreate your own combination or try one of these. Start with a spread to help stick other fillings together. Place toppings incenter of tortilla with the water melon spear on top. Roll tortilla over water melon spear, tucking in all ingre dients. Fasten with toothpick if needed.English Tea Sandwich Wrap: Flour tortilla, chive cream cheese, ham, water-melon, watercressGreek Wrap: Spinach tortilla, plain Greek yogurt, feta cheese, watermelon, black olivesLatin Watermelon Wrap: Flour tortilla, ham, watermelon, cilantro, guacamole, scallions, pepper Jack cheese, jalapenoSouthwest Chicken Wrap:Cornorflourtortilla, guacamole, pepper Jack cheese, spicy chicken, romaine lettuce, watermelon, bacon ranch dressing, salsaWatermelon Caprese Wrap: Flour tortilla, pepperoni, watermelon, moz zarella, basil, pesto sauceThai Peanut Chicken Wrap: Wheat tortilla, roasted chicken, Bibb lettuce, Thai peanut sauce, carrots, water melon, cilantroSouthwest Veggie Wrap: Spinach tortilla, cucumber, watermelon, cilan tro, Swiss cheese, BBQ ranch dressing, guacamoleMid Eastern Veggie Wrap: Wheat tortilla, hummus with pine nuts, mint, thin cucumber slices, watermelon Ginger Chicken Wrap: Wheat tortilla, teriyaki ginger sauce, chicken, sprouts, watermelon, sweet chili and ginger, Bibb lettuceHawaiian Wrap: Spinach tortilla, pine apple cream cheese, sweet chile with ginger, ham, watermelon

Wacky Watermelon FactsnThe first recorded watermelon

harvest occurred in Egypt some 5,000 years ago.

n Watermelon is the most consumed melon in the U.S., followed by cantaloupe and honeydew.

n Early explorers used watermelons as canteens to store liquids.

n To date, the world’s heaviest watermelon was recorded in 2005 and weighed in at 268.8 pounds.

n Watermelon is made up of 92 percent water.

Breakfast Push PopsDiced watermelon chunks Yogurt of choiceGranola Push pop molds, sold at most restaurant supply stores Layer watermelon, yogurt and granola into molds and top with yogurt and watermelon chunks. Freeze push pop molds and enjoy.

Watermelon Strawberry Mint Salsa 1 cup diced watermelon (seeds removed) 3/4 cup diced strawberries 1/4 cup diced red onion 2 tablespoons chopped fresh mint leaves 2 tablespoons diced seeded jalapeño chile 1 tablespoon lime juice 1 teaspoon sugar (optional, to taste)Gently stir together all ingredients in bowl. Let stand to blendflavors,about 1 hour. For a dynamite combination, serve salsa with Caribbean or jerk seasoned grilled items, or with pretzels.

FAMILY FEATURES

In the warm summer months, nothing beats spending time together creating fun snacks that promote healthy eating and a little

creativity.The summer boasts a wealth of fresh fruit to draw inspiration from –

especiallyeveryone’sfavorite–watermelon.Itscool,juicyflavorspeaksto your senses. Plus, it’s packed with key vitamins and minerals, so it’s a snack you can feel good about serving to your family.

Fabulously Fresh IdeasKick off this fun-in-the-sun season and make memories with fresh ideas that get the whole family involved. Create a splash at your next barbeque or summer party with this adorable Mermaid Tail. Fashioned from watermelon rinds, your family will love to help you create this masterpiece as well as devour it. Need to perk up lunch? Your family will love mixing and matching their own flavor combinations withWatermelon Sandwich Wraps. These healthy, edible creations are sure to bring about many smiles.

You can find more sweet summertime recipes and ideas at www.watermelon.org.

June/July 2013 23

bring friends together around the table

Tacos with Lime Marinated Vidalia Onions and Grilled Italian SausagesServings: 4 to 6

“Tacos loaded with color and flavor spice up a summertime cookout like nothing else,” Lang said. “Arrange all the ingredients on a platter for tacos that are pretty and easy for guests to put together.”

1 yellow bell pepper, cut into 1/3-inch strips 1 red bell pepper, cut into 1/3-inch strips 1 orange bell pepper, cut into 1/3-inch strips 2 Vidalia onions, sliced into half-moons 3 jalapeño peppers, sliced into very thin strips 1/4 cup freshly squeezed lime juice 3 tablespoons olive oil 1 tablespoon Gourmet Garden Cilantro 2 teaspoons Gourmet Garden Chunky Garlic 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper 1 (19oz) pkg Johnsonville Italian Mild Sausage Links 10 (6-inch) corn tortillas 2 Avocados from Mexico, sliced 5 ounces goat cheese, crumbled 2 cups grape tomatoes, sliced in half 1 lime, cut into 6 wedgesCombine bell peppers, onions and jalapeño peppers in large bowl. In small bowl, whisk together lime juice, olive oil, cilantro, garlic, salt and pepper. Pour over bell pepper mix ture. Marinate for 45 minutes.

Preheat grill to medium heat (about 350°F). Add sausages and grill, covered, 15 to 20 min utes, turning often, until browned and cooked through. Cool slightly and cut in half lengthwise.

Use slotted spoon to transfer bell pepper mixture to a grill basket. Grill over medium heat for about 10 minutes, until slightly charred. Discard marinade.

Grill tortillas until warm, about 1 minute per side.Arrange a large platter with bell pepper mixture, sausages, avocados, goat cheese,

tomatoes and tortillas. Serve with lime wedges. Recipe submitted by Rebecca Lang, 2013

FAMILY FEATURES

There are no better reasons for out door entertaining than good friends, good food and good weather.

“I’ve made a lot of friends around the table in my life,” said Rebecca Lang, food writer, television personality and author of such cookbooks as “Around the Southern Table.”

Lang’s favorite dishes are those that are easy on the cook and incorporate Southern specialties, such as Vidalia onions. Whether you’re planning for several dozen guests or inviting over a few close friends, impress them with delicious dishes in a comfortable setting.

Need a little inspiration to get the party started? Lang and other experts offer tips and recipesatwww.flavors-of-summer.com.Haveacrowdpleasingrecipeofyourown?Visitthe website to com pete for a $1,000 prize or entertainment package valued at $5,000. Simply submit a recipe in the following four categories: Grilling Favorites; Salads, Sides, and Desserts; Marinades, Sauces, and Salsas; Outdoor Decorating and Entertaining, and get ready to celebrate. All entries must be received by August 15, 2013.

Two Way Vidalia Onion Sliders with Toasted Pecan MayonnaiseServings: 8 (makes 16 sliders)“These little burgers pack a big punch with both caramelized and grilled Vidalia onions,” Lang said. “They’re gloriously dressed up with blue cheese, fancy mayonnaise and pickled okra. Look for slider buns in your local bakery or bread section of larger grocery stores or use small dinner rolls.”

Whisk together mayonnaise, lemon juice, cayenne and paprika. Stir in pecans. Cover and refrigerate until serving.

Heat 1 tablespoon olive oil in large skillet over medium heat. Cut 1 onion into half-moons. Cook onion 18 to 20 min utes, stir ring often, until caramel colored. Cool and chop into 1/2-inch pieces.

Preheat grill to medium heat.Slice remaining onion into 1/3-inch-thick slices. Rub with remaining table spoon

olive oil.Grill for 6 to 8minutes per side, flipping carefullywith spatula, or untilsoftened and grill marked. Cut each slice into 3 or 4 wedges. Set aside.

Combine lean ground beef, ground chuck, blue cheese, caramel ized onion, salt and pepper. Divide beef mixture into 16 equal portions (scant 1/3 cup each); gently shape each portion into 3/4-inch-thick patty.

Arrange patties on lightly oiled grill rack; grill 7 to 8 minutes on each side or until desired degree of doneness.

Place buns, cut sides down, on grill rack. Grill for 1 minute or until toasted. Spread about 1 teaspoon mayon naise on bottom half of each bun; top with 1

patty. Top each slider with another teaspoon mayonnaise, grilled onion wedge, pickled okra halves, and about 2 tablespoons arugula. Top with bun tops. Secure with wooden picks, if desired.Recipe submitted by Rebecca Lang, 2013

1/2 cups mayonnaise 2 Tbsp freshly squeezed lemon juice 1/8 tsp cayenne pepper 1/2 tsp paprika 1/2 cups chopped pecans, toasted 2 Tbsp olive oil, divided 2 Vidalia onions, divided 1 lb. lean ground beef (7% fat) 1 lb. ground chuck (20% fat) 5 oz crumbled blue cheese (1-1/4 cups) 1/4 tsp salt 1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper

Salmon with Mango, Ginger & Vidalia OnionsServings: 8“Topping an impressive side of salmon with a refreshing blend of citrus-kissed mangos and Vidalia onions simply screams summer time,” Lang said. “The fish can be served hot or cold, so it makes the rest of the menu a breeze.” 2 mangos 2 Vidalia onions 1/4 c freshly squeezed lime juice 1 Tbsp freshly squeezed lemon juice 1 Tbsp honey 2 Tbsp olive oil 1/2 tsp salt 2 tsp Gourmet Garden Ginger 1 (3-lb) whole side of wild salmon with skin 1 tablespoon olive oil Salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste 3 Tbsp fresh mint, chopped Lime wedges, optionalPeel and slice mangos into 1/8-inch-thick slices. Slice onions into 2 x 1/8-inch slices (julienne). Combine in large glass mixing bowl.

Whisk lime juice, lemon juice, honey, 2 tablespoons olive oil, 1/2 teaspoon salt, and ginger in a small bowl. Pour over mango mixture. Cover and chill for 1 hour.

Preheat grill to medium heat. Rub top of salmon with 1 table spoon olive oil and season with salt and pepper. Grill fish, skin side down (without flipping), overindirectheatfor16to18minutes,oruntileasilyflakeswithfork.Useanextralargespatula or rimless baking sheet to gently lift salmon off the grill, leaving skin on the grill rack.

Stir mint into mango mix ture. Allow salmon to cool for about 5 minutes. Use slotted spoon to top salmon with mango mixture, arrang ing down the center of the fish.Garnishwithlimewedges,ifdesired.Recipe submitted by Rebecca Lang, 2013

16 slider buns or round dinner rolls 24 pickled okra pods, sliced lengthwise in half 2 cups baby arugula Wooden picks, optional

24 June/July 2013

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Everyone feels sad or irritable sometimes, or has trouble sleeping occasionally. But these feelings and troubles usually pass after a couple of days. When a man has

depression, he has trouble with daily life and loses interest in anything for weeks at a time.

Both men and women get depression. But men can experience it differently than women. Men may be more likely to feel very tired and irritable, and lose interest in their work, family or hobbies. They may be more likely to have difficulty sleeping than women who have depression. And although women with depression are more likely to attempt suicide, men are more likely to die by suicide.

Many men do not recognize, acknowledge or seek help for their depression. They may be reluctant to talk about how they are feeling. But depression is a real and treatable illness. It can affect any man at any age. With the right treatment, most men with depression can get better and gain back their interest in work, family and hobbies. If you feel you may be suffering from depression, talk with your doctor.

Source: National Institute of Mental Health

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by Bob Whitworth

Got Moles?totally ineffective. Before, you tell me that you put them in the run and they disappeared, let me tell you that voles or short-tailed meadow mice use the same runs as moles and will readily clean up any bait you put out, as will chipmunks. So, we will rule out the effectiveness of poison baits.

An application of powerful insecticide will often take out most or all of the grubs and earthworms from your soil, and result in the moles moving to a neighbor’s lawn. From this writer’s perspective, this is a poor choice. It is just not the right thing to do. Our soil needs the earthworms to aid in decomposition of organic matter and to improve the soil structure.

So, the only real alternative is the use of mole traps. A great fact is that usually huge numbers of moles do not occupy a given area. Trapping a few usually will result in noticeable differences in the amount of damage seen. A search online resulted in the find of several brands of mole traps and several of them appear to be very capable of taking out the problem animals.

First, walk the runs down flat as possible and wait overnight to see which ones are raised back up. Then, place the spring loaded traps on

the runs that have been used overnight. Every set will not take a mole, but persistent use of the traps should reduce your

population to a manageable level.Just a word about dogs that are mole getters. It has been my experience that the small terrier

types with good ability can be very effective against moles. But, some dogs will simply

start digging and totally destroy a yard before they catch the critter, if they do, in fact, catch it.

Bob Whitworth obtained both his bachelor’s and master’s degree from the University of Tennessee, Knoxville and enjoyed a long career in agriculture. He retired as the Director of the Tipton County Extension Office.

My five acre wooded yard has supported a few moles for years and I have simply tolerated them.

Actually, have been somewhat thankful that my soil and soil conditions are good enough to support them. Moles usually are not a problem in lawns and gardens with very poor soil conditions. That is because poor, droughty soil will not support the grubs and earthworms that the critters thrive on.

Recently, a super friendly mole made a tunnel right up to my back door stoop. This was my first encounter with one so close to the house and my personal space. On the next day, he had tunneled under the sidewalk

and made his way into the part of the yard that we call the courtyard and he is most unwelcome there.

Now, I spent a long career in agriculture and was asked very often for advice on mole control. One of my co-workers and I always told each other that if we could come up with a truly effective control for the super-smooth, furry little mammals, we could enjoy a prosperous early retirement. But, we never found that magical solution.

University horticulture types and wildlife specialists will tell you that total control is impossible and that trapping is probably the most effective. Others will say that if you rid property of all earthworms and grubs, the moles will leave due to lack of food.

These same specialists will tell you that moles only consume grubs and earthworms. This is a major fact not to be ignored in mole control. The poison peanuts and other mole baits are not consumed by the critters, so they are

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26 June/July 2013

InCOnTInEnCE? PELVIC PAIn? PhysiCal TheraPy is The answer!

Contrary to popular belief, bladder leakage (also known as urinary incontinence) and pelvic pain

are not typical signs of aging. It is often a taboo or embarrassing topic to bring up, but millions of men and women around the world suffer from one or both of these issues and never seek medical attention. Physical therapy is an option to help decrease urinary incontinence and relieve pelvic pain after surgery, child birth, trauma, menopause, or signs and symptoms that have occurred for no reason at all. Most of these issues are caused by muscle weakness or over-use and can be corrected with simple strengthening and stretching exercises combined with a variety of skilled services that are individualized for each patient. The first step is to understand that incontinence and pelvic pain are treatable medical conditions, and pelvic floor physical therapists are specially trained to perform these treatments.

Few of my patients are familiar with what the pelvic floor is or where it is on the body; even fewer understand its function. The functions these muscles provide are often taken for granted as our body seems to naturally get the hang of their purpose without having to think about it. The pelvic floor is made of layers of muscle that attach from the front to the back of the pelvic bone, like a hammock. These muscles function to support the bladder, colon, and, in women, the uterus. Just like a dam functions to control a river, the pelvic floor functions to control the exit of urine and gas and holds the bladder, rectum, and uterus in place. Strengthening these muscles decreases the risk of urine or gas escaping uncontrollably. When the bladder, rectum, or uterus loses support and begins to fall into the vaginal canal, and sometimes out of the vagina, the patient experiences a pelvic organ prolapse. Symptoms can include bladder leakage, constipation, difficulty with bowel movements, or pelvic pressure/pain. Pelvic organ prolapse can even cause lower abdominal or low back pain. Though strengthening alone cannot reverse a pelvic organ prolapse, it can reduce or resolve the symptoms and can often be the difference between having surgery and not having surgery. Pelvic floor physical therapists treat these issues with a computer program hooked up to surface electromyography (SEMG), also known as biofeedback, to help visualize the movement and strength of the pelvic floor muscles. Similar technology assists cardiologists in seeing heart beats on an EKG. SEMG allows the patient to see if he or she is correctly performing a pelvic floor contraction, also known as a kegel contraction. The computer biofeedback program allows both therapist and patient to target the correct muscles, which increases strength, coordination, and endurance more quickly.

As with any strengthening program, the results are only as good as the patient’s effort. The harder you work, the faster you see results! Your physical therapist will provide exercises on the first visit and gradually make the exercises more challenging to meet the goals you’ve set together. If you’re unsure of how to perform a kegel correctly you may be a candidate for pelvic floor rehabilitation.

Just as the muscles of the pelvic floor can become

too weak, they can also become overactive and form muscle spasms or tender points. The pelvic floor can hold tension or spasms similar to neck and back pain

By Jenny Day, DPT, Sports Plus AquaTherapies

from a hard day at work. Pelvic spasms can cause vaginal or testicular pain but few know it can also be a culprit of lower abdominal and low back pain. As the pelvic floor contracts into spasms it begins to slow the flow of blood and lymphatic fluid through your core which can bring on a dull ache that gradually turns into sharp pain or even burning. This can range from pain with certain activities such as intercourse, prolonged sitting, or exercise to constant pain with little relief. Patients are taught numerous self treatment techniques to keep pain from returning. If pain is one of your symptoms take a moment of your day to focus on deep breathing and stretch the muscles of your inner thigh, hamstring, and low back. If stretches alone do little to alleviate your pelvic pain, speak with your primary care provider to see if pelvic floor rehabilitation is appropriate for you.

Pelvic pain can also be caused from surgery to the pelvis, the low back, lower

abdomen, and hip. Pain can come from the cut tissue, inflammation in the area, or the scar itself. Most physicians will tell you to massage or move a healed scar to make sure it doesn’t attach to the underlying tissue but people tend to forget this important task when the scar is in a sensitive area. Physical therapists work on stretching the tissue and providing sensory training to decrease the risk of the tissue becoming overly sensitive. If necessary, modalities such as ultrasound are used to heat the tissue and facilitate healing and decrease pain. Give your scar up to a year to heal on its own, but if it continues to cause pain or keep you from wearing your favorite pair of skinny jeans it’s time to talk to your doctor about a physical therapist referral.

You’ve reached the first step! You understand where the pelvic floor is located and the many facets of its function. Don’t let pelvic floor dysfunction be the reason to avoid jumping on the trampoline with your children, taking that romantic getaway with your spouse, or even wearing that slim fitting dress you’ve had in your closet all year. The topic of pelvic pain, incontinence, or pelvic organ prolapse is no longer taboo. There is a support system waiting to help you take the next step. It begins with a long awaited conversation with your doctor and a visit to your local pelvic floor physical therapist.