Weep Not Child - Parents' Role in a Child Custody Program to a Responsible Adult

By Ade Adewolu

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It is a strange dilemma that of all mammals, only humans in the animal kingdom have been found to be most unpredictable in the nurturing of their young ones to maturity. This is particularly so in the light of the fact that humans are the most socially organized and hence be more conscious of their roles and responsibilities to the young and vulnerable leaders of the society of the future.

Child Custody When Both Parents Are Together: A child whose parents are alive and cohabit deserves the absolute parental support in their formative years of life. The child's upbringing and success later in life depends on the quality of parental support obtained in his/her formative years. It is morally unacceptable for any parent to deliberately deny a child the love, support, and attention that is vital to the balanced view of life and the future of the child.

Child Custody When The Parents Are Separated: Child custody is very critical and must be carefully and delicately handled when the parents plan to or are separated. Both parents would do well to recognize the need of the child for an unconditional love from both parents. Every effort should be put in place by the parents to 'insulate' the child from whatever stress created as a result of their separation. Any strain in the relationship between the parents should be addressed without any involvement of the child. Much as this may not always be easy, it is only fair that the child is given the necessary support, love and attention.

Child Custody When One Of The Parents Is Dead: When one of the parents is dead, the surviving parent needs to recognize the moral obligation to rise to the challenge of giving necessary love and attention to the child. A child might wish to mourn the loss of his/her late parent in totally different way from the surviving parent might mourn the loss of his/her spouse. This should not prevent the parent from taking every step to support the child, especially in and throughout his/her formative years of life.

Child Custody When One Of The Parents Is Incapacitated or Inaccessible: In the event where one of the parents is incapacitated or inaccessible, the case is similar to where one of the parents is deceased. The child's custody with regards to love, affection, and support is without any doubt unconditional. The child was brought into this world by mutual consent. S/he deserves to be loved, supported and encouraged to excel in whatever vocation s/he desires to pursue in live - to the best use of available resources.

Foster Parenting: Child Custody By Choice: Child custody by choice is slightly different to the ones discussed above. Foster parents who choose to adopt a child (or children) must do everything to give the child a duty of care, love, support and affection. This is to enable the child to optimize his/her human potential in life.

Conclusion: It is hoped that this article would help highlight the importance of caring, loving, and nurturing the child. This is particularly crucial, irrespective of relationship status of the parents as the child grows through his/her formative years of life.

ADE ADEWOLU

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