SENTENCE FLUENCY

“My Grandma” revision example:

I love my grandma! She is 69 and lives in Beaverton with her three cats and two goldfish. When I visit, she cooks my favorite desserts like chocolate pie, sugar cookies, and cinnamon bread.

Grandma is so nice and I know she loves me a lot because she does my homework and sticks up for me when others try to hurt me. I love when she calls and when she takes me shopping because she buys me presents like shoes. She is the best grandma ever!