REFILL YOUR BUCKET 

“Managing stress through Recreation” 

We all know what Stress is…but what is 

Recreation? 

Webster’s dictionary defines recreations as: 

Entertainment, Amusement, Enjoyment, Fun or 

Diversion  

 

 You are all at a different stage of life.  You may have trying toddlers, challenging teenagers, demanding careers, heavy church responsibilities, civic and community service and many other stress related worries.  Don’t be discouraged, you can do hard things and manage your stressful lives through “Recreation.”  

Do you battle with “Good‐Better‐Best” and feel your bucket is empty? Are you are lacking the necessary reservoir to serve your family, friends and the Lord?  

Often we are like the farmer who is milking his cow.  Gently he squirts the warm, delicious milk into the bucket, but the bucket never fills.  Finally after some close observation, the farmer discovers a hole in the bucket.   The milk is unable to remain contained until the bucket is repaired and reinforced! 

There have been times in all our lives where we have filled our “buckets” to be overflowing…but also equal amounts of time when these buckets need to be repaired and refilled.   

There is not one correct answer to manage your stress, because each of us refills our buckets in various ways.  The one fact that can be emphasized is that everyone needs to find fulfilling ways to make this happen.  This balance will re‐energize and empower us to continue on with “Joy beyond Measure,” and maintain positive attitudes towards the individual and personalized stresses of life we each encounter. 

We live in a day and time when everything is accelerating!  How can we reduce stress while taking time for ourselves and yet still accomplish what is required of us?   Sometimes we feel selfish as we indulge ourselves especially when there is so much around us that needs to be done. Taking a diversion from our hectic routines to do something that we enjoy doing will refill our buckets and empower us with more energy to find more effective use of our time, and bring joy into our lives. 

(Refer to the story:  Exhaustion is not a prerequisite to Perfection, by Cindy K. Peterson at the end of this handout!) 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How do I start?? 

Take the “How well do you handle stress questioner” developed by Dr. George S. Everly, Jr., of the University of Maryland.  Taken from a talk   

By Eric Stephan Ensign April 1982 

This is meant as a guide to help you raise the level of your awareness.  Simply add or subtract the number of points indicated in each question.   

See how well you score and then take some of the appropriate steps to correct your life. 

1. Give yourself 20 points if you feel that you have a very supportive family.  

2. Add 15 points if you feel that you lead a righteous life.  

3. Add 10 points if you actively engage in a hobby or form of recreation.  

4. Add 20 points if you practice some form of relaxation technique (like progressive muscle relaxation, meditation, imagery, etc.) each day.  

5. If you are within 14 pounds of your ideal weight, add 15 points.  

6. Subtract 15 points if you are experiencing strong financial disagreements with someone.  

7. Add 10 points if you do something during the course of the week that is enjoyable and just for you.  

8. Add 10 points if you regularly participate in church or social activities that you enjoy.  

9. For each nutritionally balanced meal that you eat during a week (fresh fruit and vegetables included, and easy on the sweets!) add 5 points.  

10. Subtract 20 points if you feel that your life is filled with envy, jealousy, and/or competition.  

11. Add 10 points if you have some place in your home where you can relax and be alone.  

12. Subtract 5 points for each day of the week that you take medication to help you sleep.  

13. Subtract 10 points for each day during the week that you take a chemical substance to reduce anxiety or stress.  

14. Subtract 10 points if you are frustrated by interruptions of your daily activities.  

15. Every time you exercise for over 30 minutes during the week, add 15 points.  

16. Each time you bring work home during a week, subtract 5 points.  

17. Subtract 5 points for each day during the week that you have a strong disagreement or argument at home or work.  

Scoring: If you scored above 75 points, you should be able to handle most of the frustrations of daily living. If you feel inadequate, it may be that you are setting your goals a little too high.  

Scores in the 50 to 75 range are average. However, you may find particular situations quite stressful and difficult to control. Review the questions to see where you can improve.  

Generally, a score below 50 indicates an inability to handle anything but low levels of anxiety 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2.  Review the Five Ways to Reduce Stress by Paula J. Lewis Liahona September 2000 

 

1. Prioritize. If you feel you are trying to do too much, examine what you are doing. Some activities are less important than others and require less time and attention. Decide what is best for you to do, then focus on those priorities. Separate the essential from the nonessential. Essentials include rest, nutritious food, prayer, exercise, Church callings and attendance, and scripture study. Other priorities depend on your own circumstances. 

2. Take a break. Another way to relieve stress is to take a break from your normal routine. Such a break could be a half‐hour nap, a walk, or a family activity. 

3. Ask for help. If you need help from others, ask for it. One overburdened mother prayed for guidance, discussed her feelings with her husband, and then presented her concerns during a family council. The family decided to divide up many of the evening chores. As they worked together, the mother began to feel better and the family grew closer. 

In another family, the birth of a disabled baby quickly overwhelmed the parents’ resources. But with the daily help of Relief Society sisters, the parents were able to manage their responsibilities. 

4. Eliminate nonessentials. Another way to deal with stress is to eliminate some items from your to‐do list. One year our local school could not find enough volunteers to hold an elaborate holiday carnival. When the event had to be canceled, parents planned small, manageable parties instead. 

5. Do it. There will be times when, through prayer, we realize the best   option is just to do what needs to be done. At such times, we need to remember that those who “put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions” (Alma 36:3). 

 

Recreation comes in many forms, it can be as elaborate as an exciting trip to see the wonders of the world, 

Or... As simple as an hour of “Me” time to do something that makes me 

happy!   

There truly are many ways we can refill our buckets:  Everyone has different needs, likes, and desires.  Hopefully some of these suggestions 

will lead you to something that works for you.  Look over the suggestions you feel are workable for you, and try some of them.  Pray 

about some of them and see if they work.   

Here are some suggestions of diversions that can be incorporated:  Remember…there are no limitations.  Just do whatever brings you joy and refill your bucket. 

• Take an evening walk • Take a bubble bath • Have a good cry • Listen to soothing music • Give someone a hug • Laugh  • Visit a place where you’ve always wanted to go 

• Have a good visit with a friend.  The fellowships of true friends who will listen to you and correctly counsel and share your joys and burdens are priceless! 

• Make a date with someone you love • Enjoy nature: lie outside and count the stars or watch the 

clouds roll by.  • Write expressions of gratitude to anyone • Read something you enjoy (ask a friend for suggestions) • Create something:  a flower patch, a scrapbook, a painting a 

new recipe, new thoughts, create an organized space! • Take a class, learn something new, discover “Google.” • Go to the Temple, or go sit in a quiet spot by the Temple  • Do some family history or a batch of extractions.  Read some 

family history…yours or others. • Go to an uplifting movie • Have some alone time where you can think, meditate, or pray.  • Turn your phone off and go somewhere no one can find you. • Go to lunch with a friend…or make lunch for a friend • Paint your fingernails or toenails…(even better get a pedicure), 

cut your hair • Play with your pet • Write a missionary • Get some Sun! • Go golfing, swimming, biking, hiking, or any sport you like • Attend a ball game and cheer for your favorite team • Set a goal…and accomplish it  • Plan a family gathering for no other reason than to just have  

Fun  

Don’t beat yourself up for what you don’t do…just reevaluate and think about some of your “Favorite things”…and then it won’t seem…. 

So Bad! 

 There are days that I can’t handle the stress of hearing the phone ring one more time with pressing demands!  I have a successful and stressful real estate career that demands availability 24/7.   At the same time, I am diligently trying to be an attentive mother of 5 and playful grandmother of 7.  I have aging parents who need care, attention, and love, and a Missionary who needs encouragement, letters and packages!   There are talks to prepare, visiting teaching to complete, service to render and activities to attend.  Sometimes I forget to breathe!!!   

I have found many of the previous suggestions to be helpful in managing my stress.  Even the simplest diversion from my heavy schedule can refill my bucket enough to make it through another minute, hour, or day.  Just to turn my phone off for an hour for some alone time helps calm me so I can productively move on. Going outside for a quick breath of air to feel the sun on my face can refill my bucket!  Obviously the more time the better, but I relish even a minute or two with a promise that I will schedule some time for myself….guilt free!  Many times it comes late at night as I sit alone in a hot bubble bath and just renew, think and meditate.  Sometimes it takes a trip out of town to rest, heal and regroup.  Each of us is different, but we can each find ways that work for us.  It is my prayer that you will be diligent in finding personal ways that work for you.  Don’t give up….and try many alternatives until you find what works.  

Now…Review the Signs that you are Managing Stress: (From the talk ...”When Life is Getting you Down” by Val D. MacMurray, PhD. Ensign June 1984) 

Evaluate your life and see how well you are doing with the following items: 

• Tolerance of others

• The ability to finish tasks efficiently, take responsibility, handle frustrations and difficulties, and work under authority.

• The ability to adapt to changes.

• A sense of belonging.

• Reliability.

• The ability to show friendliness and love.

• A sense of self-reliance and independence.

• A sense of humor.

• An ability to eat, sleep, and relax naturally.

As you review your life and determine the areas that are causing you stress, take the “How Do You Handle Stress” questionnaire and review the five ways to reduce stress.  You will then want to find forms of recreation that will help you refill your bucket.  Finally, review the signs that will help you recognize how well you are managing your stress.   

 

Give yourself permission to refill

your bucket, make the necessary

repairs that you may be filled with

the Love of the Savior to endure

your life well, and serve others

which always refills your bucket!

Quotes, Scriptures

and stories on

managing Stress

“Recreation and diversion are as necessary

to our well being as the more serious pursuits

of life. President Brigham Young (Discourses

of Brigham Young, sel. John A. Widtsoe

(SLC:Desert Book, Co., 1941) P. 238

It is sometimes difficult to decide how best to use

our time! Certainly recreation is as

important as work for a well-balanced life.

But how one balances the two is the

trick…There are many adults who would

find life much more joyful and productive if

they allowed themselves more recreation.

Steven C. Walker, “I have a Question.”

Ensign, Oct 1988, 27

Try to cut out the extra commitments, sisters, find

some time for yourself to cultivate your gifts and

interests. Pick one or two things that you would

like to learn or do that will enrich your life, and

make time for them, Water cannot be drawn

from an empty well, and if you are not

setting aside a little time for what

replenishes you, you will have less and less to

give to others, even to your children. Elder M.

Russell Ballard, Daughters of God,”Ensign,

May 2008,108-10

In righteousness there is great simplicity!

Elder William R. Bradford (Righteousness,

“Liahona, Jan. 2000, 103; Ensign, Nov.

1999,85)

The Power of Laughter

On Average children laugh 400 times a day,

while adults laugh about 15 times. I have learned

that the ability to laugh at everyday family

difficulties helps keep life in perspective. If we

will learn to laugh and play more with our

families, not only will we feel better but so will

they. “A merry heart doeth good like a

medicine,” Proverbs 17:22. Studies show

that humor and laughter help people live longer,

happier lives; be more creative and productive, and

have more energy with less physical discomfort.

Humor reduces stress, fear, intimidation,

embarrassment, and anger. Laughter also has

extraordinary healing power. When a person

laughs, blood pressure decreases, heart rate and

respiration increase, the body releases endorphins,

and depression declines. After the laughter

subsides and you relax again, that good feeling has

a lasting effect, even until the next day. Not

many medicines will do that! Gary K. Palmer,

”The power of Laughter,” Ensign, Sep 2007,

32-35

 

 

Elder L. Tom Perry “Let him do it with

simplicity,” Ensign, Nov, 2008, p.7-10

“I remember a particular period of my life when I was under

unusual stress. There were troubles with my employment, and at

the same time, my wife was diagnosed with a life-threatening

illness. This was one of those times when it felt like the

adversary had mounted a frontal assault against me and my

family. On days when the stresses and anxieties of our

tumultuous life were about to get the best of us, my wife and I

found a way to relieve them.

We drove to a place just a few miles from our home to get away

for a few moments of relief from our troubles, talk, and give

emotional comfort to each other. Our place was Walden Pond.

It was a beautiful little pond surrounded by forests of trees.

When my wife was feeling strong enough, we’d go for a walk

around the pond. Other days, when she did not feel up to the

exertion of walking, we’d just sit in the car and talk. Walden

Pond was our special place to pause, reflect, and heal. Perhaps

it was partly due to its history—its connection to the efforts of

Henry David Thoreau to separate himself from worldliness for a

period of years—that Walden Pond offered us so much hope

for simplicity and provided such a renewing escape from our overly

complex lives.”

Mosiah 4:27 King Benjamin counseled us to “see that

all these things are done in wisdom and order, for it is

not requisite that a man should run faster than he has

strength 2 Nephi 2:25

Men are that they might have Joy!!!

2Nephi 2:25

For a wonderful, funny, and informative

article, read the following:

Exhaustion Is Not a

Prerequisite to Perfection-

Cindy K. Peterson Ensign Oct, 1993

(Excerpts)

“In my house hangs an imaginary blue ribbon. It is

magnificent: two rows of ruffles and long, flowing streamers.

In the center, in large letters, it reads, “First Place:

Exhausted 87% of the Time.” It’s mine—I worked hard

for it.

I can’t remember when I began to think my frequent fatigue

was proof that I was diligently trying to do the will of the

Lord, or proof that I had no time for anything else in my

life. Second Nephi 2:25 [2 Ne. 2:25] says, “Men are,

that they might have joy.” Somehow I twisted that scripture in

my mind to read, “Men and women are that they might be

exhausted—and the more the better.” In striving to do

everything and to perfect myself, I came to the erroneous

conclusion that I had so much to accomplish that I couldn’t

afford the luxury of rest.

After repeatedly battling exhaustion, I realized how foolishly

counterproductive my efforts were. What good did it do me to

work at a racing pace for several days only to be flat in bed

for the next day or two? The more I thought about it, the

more I realized that being rested is essential to having the

energy necessary to reach perfection.

That’s when I began searching for solutions. PFirst I tried

time management, but in my misunderstanding of how to use its

principles, I ended up with rigid schedules and never-ending

lists. Then I tried exercising, but I pushed myself too hard and

pulled a rusty muscle. I tried going to bed earlier, but over

time I felt so guilty leaving projects undone that I couldn’t

sleep.

Finding a solution was much more difficult than I had

expected. I learned that there isn’t one all-time solution.

Fatigue has multiple, interrelated facets, so I must find

multiple, interrelated solutions. One solution might help in

one area but make other areas worse. Also, too little

application of a solution is ineffective; too obsessive a use of

it only makes the so-called solution part of the problem. And

the relationships between various areas on the continuum

constantly shift and change—which is why something might

work one day or at one period but not the next.”…

“I still struggle with fatigue; perhaps I always will. But I

have managed to significantly minimize it since I realized that

the Lord doesn’t expect me to be exhausted. (See D&C

10:4.) In fact, the Spirit has helped me realize that when I

live in ways that cause me constant fatigue, this represents a

mismanagement of my life and priorities. At first, I resisted

this idea, saying that everything I was doing was for my

family and husband. But the Spirit helped me see that though

I was doing “everything” for them, they wanted and needed

other things from me now—my time and my love. Further,

the Spirit helped me see that they needed this when they needed

it, not when I had completed my project, which was generally

after they were asleep or after the golden moment had passed.

I gained new insight and application into the Lord’s kind yet

pointed observation: “Martha, Martha, thou art careful and

troubled about many things:

“But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good

part.” (Luke 10:41–42.) All of the items I was

focusing on were appropriate and were important. But

relationships with a husband and children take time and

require a freedom of spirit that is pushed out of one’s mind

when priorities of importance but of lesser significance consume

one’s attention.

How sad it was for me to learn that I can push myself into

fatigue doing countless good things for my family because of

my deep love for them, yet miss the “good part” that is of far

greater impact in their lives.”

And Happy Recreating!!!!

Bibliography 

Webster’s Dictionary. [put the publication information, City: Publishing house,    year.  Example:  New York: Oxford University Press, 2008.] 

Stephan, Eric. “Reducing Stress: Welcome Thoughts for the Over‐Involved.”    Ensign, April 1982,22. 

Lewis, Paula J. “Five Ways t Reduce Stress.” Liahona, September 2000, 24. 

Tucker, Larry A. “Move More, Stress Less!” Ensign, August 2004, 58‐59. 

Perry, L. Tom. “Let Him Do It With Simplicity.” Ensign, November 2008, 7‐10. 

Doctrine & Covenants 59:18‐19 

MacMurray, Val D. “When Life is Getting You Down.” Ensign, June 1984, 56 

Mosiah 4:27 

2 Nephi 2:25 

Peterson, Cindy K. “Exhaustion Is Not a Prerequisite to Perfection.” Ensign,    October 1993, 51. 

Young, Brigham. Discourses of Brigham Young. Selected by John A. Widtsoe.    Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1941. 

Bradford, William R. “Righteousness.” Liahona, January 2000,103 and Ensign,   November 1999, 85. 

Ballard, Russell M. “Daughters of God.” Ensign, May 2008, 108‐10. 

Walker, Steven C. “I Have a Question.” Ensign, October 1988, 27. 

Palmer, Gary K. “The Power of Laughter.” Ensign, September 2007, 32‐35.