To My Donor… - Home - LifeSource · W hen the holidays come around, people who have lost a loved one often wonder what to do about the holiday greeting card. For many, this is the

I’m alive because of you. I breathe in, breathe out, and don’t know you. Did you have a wife you cherished? Children that delighted you? Did you love living, or just kind of float along? Did you ever think it could happen to you, the tragedy that took you away from your family, your life, and this world?

Was this gift your request? Did you consider and decide, not knowing what a comfort it would be in a time of heart-ache and loss for those you left behind? Did you make the choice to sign a card, tell your loved ones? How do you say something like that? Did you sit your family down and look earnestly into their eyes so they would really listen and understand that you meant it? Or did you try to make it less gloomy and just mention it casually as you peeled carrots for the salad and she rinsed the lettuce? Did you say, “Honey, someday, without warning, I might die. I don’t want to, but I might. And if I can, I want to donate my organs. It’s important to me. For my final act here, as a mortal, I want to help someone live”?

Did you believe in life after death? In immortality? Did you think you might need your body again? Did that worry you? Or did you accept, like me, that it would all work out in the end? That you’ll get your lungs back and I’ll get mine, and

To My Donor…

Introducing John LeMay 2

Kid’s Corner 3

National Donor Family

Recognition Ceremony 4

From the Editor’s Desk 5

Holiday Greeting Cards 6

Finding Purpose After 7

Tragedy

they’ll be just like new. Even better than new—they’ll be perfect.

Do you know what you did? How I got your lungs, someone else got your heart? Do you know us, our lives, and what we’ve done with them? You saved my life. Are you glad?

Can you envision us meeting one another later on? How will I recognize you? I will just know it is you without even asking. I will embrace you and cry rivers of joy and gratitude. I’ll search for the words to say what I feel and not be able to find them. But you’ll know anyway. And you’ll say, “Good job, you’re welcome.”

Until then,Darcy

Darcy received a double-lung trans-plant in 1992.

Fal l/Winter 2005

Table of CONTENTS

LifeSource will be conducting several volunteer training sessions throughout our region in the coming months. The sessions will be focused on the personal stories of donation and transplantation. We will discuss unique opportunities for volunteer-ing, learn new information about donation and transplantation, review new materi-als available for presentations, and reiterate key messages.

Opportunities for volunteering consist of a range of activities, including volunteer-ing at health fairs, sharing your personal story at local schools and churches, assisting with donor family events, in-house office duties, and distributing material at public events. Both donor family members and transplant recipients are invited to attend. The training dates are as follows:

• Wednesday, January 25, in St. Paul, Minnesota

• Saturday, March 4, in Fargo, North Dakota

• Sunday, March 5, in Sioux Falls, South Dakota

• Saturday, April 29, in St. Paul, Minnesota

Introducing…John LeMay

It is with great pleasure that we announce LifeSource has added another Family Services Coordinator to its staff in order to more effectively serve the families in our region. John LeMay will be working alongside Jill Halimi, who has been with LifeSource since 2002. Together, they hope to expand and improve the donor family aftercare pro-gram while they continue to provide compassionate care to those touched by donation.

John has a bachelors degree in psychology from the University of Minnesota, Duluth, and a master's degree from Bethel Theological Seminary. He has worked with people who have developmental disabilities, and for the past five years has volun-

teered with the Minneapolis Police Department as a chaplain, assisting the police and medical examiners in notify-ing families of a death and then sup-porting them as they begin their grief journey. He has also served as a pastor and missionary.

John has been married for eleven years to his college sweetheart, Lisa, and together they are the proud parents of a wonderful little boy, Nathaniel. Through his new position, he looks for-ward to the opportunity to listen, serve, and support families, and hopes that he is able to do it in a way that is most helpful and effective for the families.

John’s email address is [email protected]. As always, Jill Halimi’s email is [email protected].

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Mark Your CALENDAR

Please contact Jeff Richert, volun-teer coordinator for LifeSource, at [email protected], or 651-603-7863, if you have any questions or are interested in attending.

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When the holidays come around, people who have lost a loved one often wonder what to do about the holiday greeting card. For many, this is the way you update your extended network of family and friends about your life, or it’s the time to brag or tell the funny story about something that happened to you the past year. It is not generally viewed as a time to broadcast bad news. So what do you say about your loss? If it happened earlier in the year, what about those who feel you simply need to move on?

As anyone who has experienced the death of someone close to them knows, grief is not contained by any time con-straints or social practices. You are learning how to live a life without your loved one, and as the winter holiday season approaches there are new places to learn.

This might be the year to take a break from writing this letter. Or instead of

doing a large mailing, cut back on who you send it to or send it at a different time. Sending a holiday card is not a law, but a practice. You have the choice to say no.

If you do choose to send a holiday card, it can be simple, such as a card that has been preprinted with a greeting and signature in it. (A search of the internet can provide you with resources if you decide to go this route, or you can buy blank cards and attach a printed sticker.)

Here are some phrases you might like to consider:

• During this past year, we have expe-rienced deep grief. Thank you for all of your love, support, and prayers during this time.

• Like many others this year, we have lost someone we dearly loved. We move through this time with grief, as well as

joy and appreciation for your love and support.

• In the dark wilderness of our loss, our faith, com-munity, and family are the brightest stars that guide us to the next place. Thank you for your support.

• The joys of the holidays are not lost but hidden for a time. Thank you for all of

What to Do About the Holiday Greeting CardJohn LeMay, family services coordinator

your support, love, and thoughts during this time.

If you have a favorite song that seems fitting, you can use a portion of the lyrics in your greeting, or include all or part of a poem—there’s no need to create something new when someone else has already said it well.

The tradition of greeting cards or annual letters comes from wanting to share our news with our extended com-munity. While it is our nature to share only the good news, you may be amazed by what can happen when you invite those same people to walk alongside you in your grief. The love and support you gain can be extremely powerful.

Whatever you decide, please do what feels comfortable and appropriate for you and your family this holiday season.

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2550 University Avenue West, Suite 315 South St. Paul, Minnesota 55114

WE BELIEVE THAT life IS A gift TO SHARE. We pledge to provide the bridge between the loss of life and the gift of life through organ and tissue donation and transplantation

LifeSource i s the not- for-prof it , federal ly designated organ procurement organization responsible for organ donation activ it ies in Minnesota , Nor th Dakota, South Dakota and por tions of western Wisconsin. In addition, LifeSource al so manages a comprehensive t i ssue donation program.

Telephone 651.603.7800 Toll-free 1.888.536.6283

SUSAN GUNDERSON Chief Executive OfficerJILL HALIMI Editor/Family Services Coordinator [email protected] LEMAY Editor/Family Services Coordinator [email protected] JOHNSON Graphic Designer

Non-Profit Org.U.S. PostagePAID

Permit No. 3777Minneapolis, MN

Fal l/Winter 2005

REMINDER:Be sure to notify LifeSource if you change addresses in order to ensure that you continue receiving the Family Connection Newsletter.

Documents

To My Donor… - Home - LifeSource · W hen the holidays come around, people who have lost a loved one often wonder what to do about the holiday greeting card. For many, this is the