Thesis for July 31 2011 With Comments.docx 2 (3)

8/6/2019 Thesis for July 31 2011 With Comments.docx 2 (3)

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THESIS

TO EXPLORE THE CONFLICT EXPERIENCED BY WOMEN IN COHABITATING

RELATIONSHIPS: THE ROLE OF MEDIATION

BY

SHERRY ANN BERNADITTE CUMMINGS

UNIVERSITY OF THE WEST INDIES ST AUGUSTINE

TRINIDAD WEST INDIES

MSC IN MEDIATION STUDIES


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Abstract


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Introduction

Development in recent decades suggests that cohabitation is becoming more and more popular;

marriage is no longer the only way to form a co-residential union. (Blossfeld 2003; Raldey 2000

and Kiernan 2000; Manning1996; Bumpass and Sweet 1989; van de Kaa 19 93; and Manning

1994). The rising occurrence and acceptance of cohabitation is one of the demographic changes

that have occurred in the last decade and it is considered by many as a social norm. The structure

of the family has also changed drastically over the last few decades; S mock (2000)and these

changes have been accompanied by changing attitudes towards the institution of marriage on one

hand, and cohabitation on the other.

Data from 2002 National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG) indicate that over 60% of woman

ages 25-39 have cohabitated at least once compared to roughly 48% just seven years earlier

Comment [A1]: Shouldn t this refere nc e b e ath e e nd o f th e sent enc e?


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Bumpass and Lu (2000) US Department of Health and Human Services (2006). In addition,

approximately 65% of men and w om e n who married for the first time after 1995 cohabitated

beforehand (, Manning and Jones (2006).

In Trinidad and Tobago, Rhoda Reddock (1995) pointed reported onout the ethnic origin and the

sex of respondents 15years and overin cohabitating relationships in Trinidad and Tobago .There

were 21.8% mM ales, 20.8%21.8%,Ff emale s, 20.8, African 34.4% Africans , 10.4%

Indian s,10.4%, Mixed 27.1% ,Mixed and 8.1% of other ethnic groups8.1%.

Contemporary society is presently bombarded by the diverse differences of opinion in reference

to marriage with a propensity towards the acceptance of cohabitation as a valid choice for

couples and parents. The British Social Attitudes Survey (2000) postulates that, Marriage has

lost much of its social significance and cohabitation is increasingly practiced and accepted.

Stalcup, (1997:1), commenting on marriages in the United States suggested that cohabitation is

becoming more common and widely acceptable. As such, it is acquiring many of the rights once

attached to marriage. According to Bumpass and Sweet (1989), the United States estimation

of cohabitation suggests that almost half of the population in their late twenties to early thirties

had at some time been in a cohabitational relationship.

HoemandHoem (1988) stated that in Sweden and Denmark, many people look at cohabiting as

an alternative rather than an introduction to marriage (women do not necessarily see things that

way).Hoem and Hoem also state that 96 percent of married Swedish women had previously been

in a cohabitational relationship by the late 1970s. Wu (2000) argues thatin Canada ,; by the late

1980s more than 51 percent of Canadian first unions were cohabitational

Comment [A2]: Shouldn t this be in bra ck e ts,it s a refere nc e.


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cohabitating relationships. Leridon, (1990) also lends support to the argument by highlighting

that 65 percent of all first unions in France were cohabitational by the early 1980s.

Statistics put forward by Kiernan (2000) indicated that these trends prevailed throughout

Western Europe. It was found that 40 percent of women between the ages of twenty five and

twenty nine were in cohabitational cohabitationing relationship s in Austria, 37 percent in

Switzerland and 46 percent in West Germany. DeVaus, Qu and Weston, (2003), posit that most

Australian marriages are preceded by cohabitation. The spectacular growth in cohabitation in

Western countries has been observed by Dempsey and David (2003) and was found to be linked

to technological developments that allowed the separation of sex and reproduction, the growth in

employment opportunities for women, the declining influence of organized religion and the

growth in individualism.

The Cohabitation Act (1998:294)of Trinidad and Tobago defines Cohabitational Relationships

as The relationship between cohabitants, who not being married to each other are living or have

lived together, as husband and wife on a bona fide domestic basis Davies, (1999) on the other

hand sees cohabitation as the evidence of shared living arrangements, a sexual relationship,

stability, financial support, the presence of children and public acknowledgement. T he

American Heritage Dictionary (2006) also defines cohabitation as, living together in a sexual

relationship when not legally married. However, state laws in America vary in its definition of

cohabitation, for example the state of Georgia, defines cohabitation as dwelling together

continuously and openly in a meretricious relationship with another person, regardless of the sex

of the other person, USLEGAL.COM (1997-2011). Hyde, (2003) defines cohabitation as

unmarried persons living together with sexual relations assumed. Cohabitation by definition is

"two unmarried people of the opposite sex living together.


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Cohabitation is a halfway house, for people who do not want the degree of personal and social

commitment that marriage represents, at least for now (Waite and Gallagher (2000:42). The

numbers have risen since 1960 from 439,000 in 1960 to 5,500,000 in 2000, according to the

Census Bureau. Cohabitation has skyrocketed 1,150 percent in 40 years. We are seeing a very

significant cultural change where romantic love and courtship has been giving way to an

altogether new alternative. Given the statistics projected for many countries, it is evident that

cohabitation may tend to have sociological ramifications by the diffusion of cultural values.

Lesthaeghe, and Surkyn (1988-1993)

D Fern ;Burstein ;G,Fern and Lindberg (2003:5)Several researchers express concern that

cohabitation is replacing marriage with a less stable arrangement and fostering attitudes

detrimental to subsequent marital quality and stability (Fern Burstein; Fern and Lindberg

2003: 5). Andrew Cherlin (2001) states, that cohabitation affects society, marriage children and

families. Cohabitation has emerged as a new challenge related to intimate relationships in the

twenty first centurySmock (2000). I n this studythe researcher will explore the conflicts that

women in cohabitating relationship experience and the role mediation can play.

Conflict can happen anywhere in the world, it can spread far and wide and involve everyone in

its path, conflict is very difficult to understand it can come about because of differentissues; it

may also escalate because neither party want to give up their position to the other.T he study of

the conflicts women in cohabitating relationships experience will clear up the misconceptions on

the conflicts woman in cohabiting relationships face.

Comment [A3]: Theref o re ba se d on th e sedef initions by severa l autho rs, you n ee d to com ea conclusion and choos e th e d ef inition ba se d on T rinid ad act as af o re m ention ed, sinc e it appear s be most app licab le to th e Trinid ad cont ex t .

Comment [A4]: Wh y do you nee d page num bif you are not q uotin g di re ctl y.

Comment [A5]: Bef o re this st a t e m e nt you nea link sent enc e to int roduc e con f lict in coh ab itin gre la tionshi ps .

Comment [A6]: This st a t e m e nts is uncl ear.Sent e nc e n ee ds re st ructu ring.


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Weeks (1992) states, Conflict is an inescapable part of our daily life, and an inevitable result of

our highly complex, competitive and often litigious society. Conflict is intrinsic to organizations,

families and modern city life. C.W. Moore (2003:64) stated that relationship conflicts are caused

by strong emotions, misperception or stereotypes, poor communication or miscommunication

and repetitive negative behaviour.Conflict in this study refers to a purposeful struggles

between collective actors who use social power to defeat or remove opponents and to gain status,

power resources and other scarce values, (Himes (1980:14).

Kriesberg (1982) says conflict exists when two or more parties believe they have incompatible

objectives. On the other hand ,Moore (1986) identifies five causal elements in social conflict:

relationship issues, value conflicts, inconsistencies in data, structural problems, and conflicts

about interest. In this study it is important for the researcher to understand which aspect of

conflict the cohabitant may be struggling with at any point in time, (Mayer, (1995).On the other

hand Donahue and Kolt, (1992) describe conflict as a situation in which interdependent people

express differences in satisfying their individual needs and interests, and they experience

interference from each other in accomplishing these goals.

However, Jones (2001) argues that conflict is in many ways emotionally defined. She posits that

disputes occur when people perceive incompatible goals when relating with to each other, and

that these trigger events c ause conflict and elicit emotions. This study will seek to report the

emotions that woman in cohabitating relationships experience. However, Abel (1973) proposes

that the way a conflict is dealt with renders it constructive or destructive .and Abel (1973) also

statedthat conflict may not become a dispute if it is not communicated to someone in the form of

a perceived incompatibility or a contested claim.

Comment [A7]: You n ee d to ins er t th e pagenum ber a s this is a di re ct quot e.

Comment [A8]: There is som e disconn ect w itthis sent enc e. Re st ructu re this .


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Policy makers need to clarify how cohabitating families are treated and to recognize cohabitation

as a potential family form. Additionally issues such as an increase in domestic violence,

financial issues, communication issues, decision making, outside influence, empowerment issues

,change of status, disadvantages for the children in these relationships and lower levels of

happiness and well-being need to be addressed within these relationships. These also are some of

the issues that may increase the use of mediation within cohabitating relationships.

The researcher will investigate whether socio economics dynamics play a part in the lives of

cohabitating couples. The researcher will seek to determine how earnings are spent,and who

decides how the earnings should be spent, on social activities, foodstuff, utilities and clothing.

The researcher will explore what led the individuals to enter into a cohabitating relationship and

the duration of the relationship. The researcher will inquire abouttheparticipants feelingsabout

not being married, and whether they think that there is a stigma attached to persons in

cohabitatingrelationships. The researcher will question the women on whether they would prefer

to be married and whether there were plans to be married in the future. The researcher will also

question these women on how they cope with conflict in the relationship, and whether they

would consider mediation as a viable option, in finding a positive solution to conflicts that occur

in the relationship in preference to the options they were using before. Comment [A9]: Whil e I ga th er , th e se are y ouobje cti ves, f o r som e o f th em you have not pr o vida su ff icient justi f ica tion f o r exa min a tion in this stud y. E.g , wh y are y ou exa minin g socio economist a tus a s it re la t es to coh ab itin g re la tionshi ps . Yonee d to su pp o r t this usin g lit era tu re.


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Literature Review

Bumpass, Sweet and Cherlin, (1991:5) conceptualized three different views of cohabitation,

cohabitation as an alternative to marriage, cohabitation as an alternative to being single and

cohabitation as a precursor to marriage. Bumpass, Sweet and Cherlin (1991) further reiterated

that the conceptualization of cohabitation are an alternative to marriage emphasizes the

similarities between cohabiting unions and marriages, e.g. ( sexual intimacy, expressed

commitment, shared household and even child bearing) and views the difference between the

two as a choice of lifestyle . Particularly relevant to this conceptualization is the large

Comment [A10]: Wh y are y ou includin g th epage num ber here?


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increasing, proportion of cohabiting unions that involve children (. Bumpass, Sweet and

Cherlin (1991).

The conceptualization of cohabitation as an alternative to being single emphasizes the

dissimilarities between cohabitation and marriage. Rindfuss and Van den Heuvel (1992) provide

some support for this conceptualization by showing that cohabitants more closely resemble

single men and women than married couples across a wide range of attitudes and family

activities.The conceptualization of cohabitation as a precursor to marriage, according to

Bumpass, Sweet and Cherlin (1991), considers cohabitation as an intermediate step between

being single and married but treats marriage and cohabitation as qualitatively different.

Statistically cohabitation is increasing tremendously and marriages are on the decline (,

Bumpass, (1995). The office for National Statistics, in England (2001), stated that between 1979

and 1995, the percentage of women in the British population who were married decreased from

74 per cent to 56 per cent and this downward trend is continuing. In addition, as the marriages

decline so too are the divorces. B arlow, Duncan, James and Park (2005) suggested that a

change in the content of marriage, with a more negotiated and conditional commitment between

partners which is open to termination.

Dennis and Erdos, (1992) ,; Fukuyama, (1999) ,; Morgan, (2000), argues that they see these trends

as evidence of the rise of selfish individualism and the breakdown of the family. There is now

an urgent need for empirical socio-legal research to evaluate the public reasons behind

cohabitation. In addition, it is necessary to verify if there are positive and negative aspects of

cohabitation. There is an urgency to provide facts about cohabitation and to assess whether the

Comment [A11]: This is a dire ct q uot e , you nto refere nc e this pr oper ly.


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information given about cohabitation is not clouded by myths. It is also imperious to investigate

the suitability of the laws governing cohabitation and assess whether there may be options for

legal reform on cohabitation.

Michelle Le Baron (2003) states that, Culture is an essential part of conflict and conflict

resolution. In this study the researcher will understand whether the culture of cohabitating

individuals is inextricably linked to conflict. The researcher will understand whether cultures

will impacts upon the cohabitants perceptions, attitudes, and behaviour, ideas of oneself and

others, and the eventual outcome of conflicts. According to Le Baron (2003) cCultu ra l differences

emanate from age, gender, socioeconomic status, national origin, education and sexual

orientation.

C.W Moore (2003) proposes that culture comprises a wide variety of world views,beliefs,

assumptions and behaviours that are characteristics of specific groups of people. On the other

hand, Bush and& Folger, (1994 :56.)On the other hand stated , a conflict exists because of real or

apparent incompatibility of partys needs or interest, and it will involve at least three

components: what people think, what they do, and the material products they produce. Thus,

mental processes, beliefs, knowledge, and values are parts of culture.T he researcher will explore

the impact of culture in the lives of cohabitating women and understand how it is linked to

conflict experienced in theserelationships.

Encarta world dictionary (2009). Marin Clarkberg (1999) Scholarly Journal Forces (Vol ,77 No

3) addressed cohabitation, she expounded For those unsure about their economic prospects ,

living together and pooling resources in the short run may be a smarter strategy that simply

living on ones own while waiting to mature into marriage material .

Comment [A12]: P lea se refere nc e this pr ope

Comment [A13]: How are y ou goin g to m ea scultu re? I ho pe y ou can exp la in this in you rm e thodolo gy.

Comment [A14]: Wha t is this refere nc e doinhere?


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The term and approach of transformative mediation, has been brought to the fore by Baruch

Bush and Joe Folgers in the book The Promise of Mediation (1994). In this approach to

mediation , one does not seek resolution of the immediate problem, but rather seeks the

empowerment and mutual recognition of the parties involved. In this study women need to be

enabled to see and understand their partners point of view, to understand how they define the

problem they may encounter and to also understand why they seek the solution that they do, this

will foster the parties empowerment and recognition, thereby enabling them to approach their

current problem, as well as later problems, with a stronger, yet more open view, Heidi Burgess

(2011).

Public Reasons for Cohabitation

Many prenuptial, senior and retired couples may choose to cohabitate instead of marrying for

financial reasons. Propenoe, Bartkowski and XiaoheXu (1999) believe that economically

disadvantaged young people are more likely to cohabitate, because they can share economic

responsibil ities. They further identified some facets of cohabitation, like segregated finances

and partner autonomy which may offer some attraction to cohabitation. It is felt that persons will

more likely cohabitate if their parents have been divorced, Wolfinge (2005), calls it the

Intergenerational transmission of divorce.Wolfinge (2005) proposes that the children of these

divorced parents tend to have a high rate of cohabitation. In addition, cohabitation has become a

lifestyle for people who are less committed to Marriage. Mattox, (1997), stated that it may be

more accurate to say that many of these couples are anti-divorce. He noted that the

cohabitants may fear marital breakup, that they view cohabitation as a trial marriage which

will protect them from entering a marriage, which could end in a divorce. Shaw Crouse (2009)


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reiterates that when the prevailing attitude is that having sex is no big deal and entails no

commitment, then moving in and living together with no strings becomes that much more likely.

She is of the opinion that cohabitation simply reflects peoples individualism, indulgence and

preference for independence.

Types of Cohabitation

Selzer (2004) has categorized cohabitating relationships as casual, temporary, convenient

relationships that involve lit tle commitment. He further labelled cohabitation as extensions of

intimate relationships, that will last only as long as the partners enjoy being together or as an

alternative to marriage, based on the principles that marriage is an institution for pragmatic

reasons. Ingold, Inman, Jachym, Johnson and Jones (2001) were more specific in their

categorization of cohabitation; they identified the Linus Blanket Relationship characterized by

a need to be loved and the fear of being alone. Next was the Emancipation Relationship, where

the couples attempt to prove freedom to others, but there is poor communication on conflict

resolution skills. Thirdly there is the Convenience Relationship where couples are supposed to

split expense fiftyfifty; however the female generally contribute 70 percent of the income. This

type seems convenient for the male involved. Finally there is the Testing Relationship

characterized by commitment in the relationship and the couples practice marriage to test their

compatibility. Prinz (1995) identified a tripartite classification of cohabitation. Firstly, he sees

cohabitation as a prelude to marriage, then cohabitation as a variety of marriage and thirdly

cohabitation as an alternative to marriage.

Positive and Negative Aspects of Cohabitation


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Landale and Forste (1991) positively identified cohabitation as an adaptive family strategy that

allows for union formation, in the face of economic uncertainty, because it makes few

unambiguous demands on the male as the breadwinner. Moreover there are no legal

entanglements. When happiness is diminished, it is easy to leave the relationship. Popenoe

(1999) on the other hand stated that couples have the opportunity to learn about each other and

they do not have responsibility of paying their partners debt.

Waite (2000), sights some negative aspects of cohabitation. She found that men and women who

cohabitate, are more likely to experience partner abuse and infidelity and are less likely to

receive assistance from family members. Waite, (2000) also found that parenting role of a

cohabitating partner towards children of the other person is vaguely defined, making

cohabitation an unstable living arrangement for children. Grabmeier (2004) also believes that

cohabitating is not necessarily a transition period that leads to marriage because many cohabiters

disagree on the future of their relationship. Popenoe, (1999) proposes that cohabiters experience

lower levels of happiness, sexual enjoyment and well-being than married couples do. He

concluded that cohabiters are nine times more likely to split up than married couples are.

Gallagher, (2000) noted cohabitation aces marriage and thus creates the external appearance of

union of lives without creating the internal, moral, legal or emotional reality of such a union.

She reiterates that the effect could be highly destabilizing for the cohabiting couples.


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The Role of Mediation

Mediation is defined as the intervention in a negotiation or a conflict of an acceptable third-party

who has limited or no authoritative decision making power, which assist the involved parties to

voluntarily reach a mutually acceptable settlement of the issues in dispute (. Moore (2003).

Families come to mediation through one of three ways: The judge can mandate that parties

participate in mediation; the parties can volunteer to come to mediation or through referrals (.

C.W Moore (2003: 15).

The republic of Trinidad and Tobago Act No.8 of (2004:153), defines mediation as A process in

which a mediator facilitates and encourages communication and negotiation between the

Comment [A15]: Aga in, wh y did you includ epage num ber here?


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mediation parties in arriving at a voluntary agreement. Mediation Party means a person who

participates in mediation and whose consent is necessary to resolve the dispute.(P.153A)

Mediation Process includes the mediation sessions together with all administrative processes

and procedures, leading to and necessary for the conduct of such mediation session and all

processes and procedures after the completion of the mediation session, ending with the signing

of the mediation agreement,or if there is no agreement, when the mediation session is otherwise

terminated,

Mediation Sessions means a meeting between persons in dispute and a certified mediator for

the purpose of resolving the dispute by meditation and includes anything done for the purpose of:

a. arranging the meeting or by following up anything raised in the meeting. Mediator means a

neutral third party who conducts mediation.

In cohabitating relationships mediation will provide an opportunity for the cohabitants to resolve

their disputes with the help of an impartial mediator who will identify and communicate their

interest , identify their mutual interest, and will manage expectations. Mediation can be

particularly useful when communication in the cohabitating relationship has broken down or

when their emotions are intense. Since tT he mediation process is confidential and confidentiality

of the information discussed during the mediation is protected by statute. The mediator will not

impose a decision for the cohabitants, but willassist the parties in reaching their own mutually

acceptable resolution.

Some of the tenets upon which mediation hinges are that: Mediation preserves family

relationships, the process and outcomes are owned by the two parties, it is cost effective and the

mediation setting is private. The mediator is the facilitator of the dialogue and is in control of


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the process only. The mediator starts the parties off with the information about the process and

then guides the process.

The cohabitants will be made to understand that the mediator is not authorized at any time to

make a decision and should not at any time give advice on how they are to resolve their issues.

They will understand that the mediator is ethically bound to be non-bias. The mediator only

makes the process decisions, structure the conversation or order the topics and explore with their

cohabitants the impact of their decisions.

In this study the researcher will explore the experiences of women in cohabitating relationship

and the role that mediation can play; the researcher will discuss mediation as a way of coping

with conflict in the relationship. In addition, mediation will be discussed as a means of:

a. Empowering cohabitants to manage their own dispute,

b. promote peace in the relationship,

c. Reduce emotional cost,

d.

save money and assets,

e. preserve the relationship,

f. protect children

g. and improve the communication skills within the relationship

Parker Mediation Massachusetts (2011) identified many different types of mediation. For the

purpose of this studythe researcher would like to point out prenuptials / ante nuptial agreements.

Prenuptials and cohabitation agreements are contract s between married and unmarried partners

that provide a contingent plan for the possibility of divorce or separation. Ante nuptial

agreements may be used by persons marrying for the first time, but are also useful for


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peoplemarrying a second or subsequent time, particularly when parties want to preserve their

respective estates for children from prior marriages, address stepfather issues, cohabiting issues

and or outlines succession for family businesses.

Propenoe and Whitehead (2009:4) state that cohabitation is probably least harmful when it is pre-

nuptial, when both parties are definitely planning to marry, have formally announced their

engagement and have picked a wedding date.

As aforementioned, Mm ediation is generally defined as the intervention in a negotiation or a

conflict of an acceptable third party who has limited or no authoritative decision making power ,

who assist the involved parties to voluntarily reach a mutually acceptable settlement of the issues

in dispute . In addition to addressing substantive issues, mediation may also establish or

strengthen relationships of trust and respect between the parties or terminate relationships in a

manner that minimizes emotional cost and psychological harm. Christopher W. Moore. (2003).

For the benefit of this study the role of mediation is of paramount importance, since a mediator

as a third party generally has no stake in the conflict at hand. Hence the mediator is a critical

factor in conflict management and resolution. In cohabitating relationships, the participation of a

mediator provides conflicting parties with new perspectives on the issues dividing them and

more effective processes to build problem solving relationships (.C.W. Moore (2003).

Gordon (1978) proposes the legitimacy of emotions, this refers to the acceptance of a partys

right to hold or possess specific feelings whether another party agrees with them or not. In

cohabitating relationships women, children and men could experience various emotions. A

mediator is important to interpret the emotions to the other party and explain why they are

appropriate or important to the person expressing them (. C.W Moore (2003 :191 ).


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In exploring the conflict experienced by women in cohabitating relationships, in relation to the

children a parent may need to know that when conflict arises there is a structured way to provide

resolution to the conflict. Mark S. Vmbreit and Edward Kruk (1995) have identified Parent

Child Mediation. The objective is to retain the intact family structure, not to restructure or

dissolve relationships.

Theoretical Framework of Cohabitation

Throughout history cohabitation had been accepted,the tendency to move in the direction of

Cohabitation and away from marriage is unique , Andrew( Cherlin, (2001). Stalcup(1997) stated

It was unacceptable a couple decades ago, it is acceptable now. Bumpass and Hen Lu

(2000:29-41) sStated that many people see cohabitation as a precursor to marriage, for more than

halfthe persons who marry today cohabitate first. Axim and Thornton (1992:357-374) on the

otherhand, suspect that the sudden increase in divorce permanently marred the image of


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marriage.Additionally, they state that the increase awareness of the social and economic costs

of divorce may be a contributing factor leading more young adults to cohabitate.

In this study the researcher is interesting in finding the socioeconomic dynamics involved in

cohabitation from a womans perspective. However Jayakody and Cabrera (2002) cite

qualitati ve evidence from Eden (2000) and Furstenberg (2001 ), showing that poor people value

marriage highly, but see it as unattainable in light of limited financial options and (especially

among women) a perceived lack of partners capable of providing reliable social and emotional

support.Dunagan (1993) on the other hand, states that those living together avoid dealing with

some of the joint decisions that married couples have to make. For example money and property

tend to be either his or hers not ours.

In this study, the researcher will seek to discuss how the cohabitating couple determines how

income should be spent and who makes these decisions. Standpoint feminism, Harding and

Wood (2003) proposethat important differences between men and women affect their

communication. These differences result from cultural expectations and treatment. This study

will discuss these issues from the standpoint of a womans perspective. A stand point is a place

from which to view the world that determines what we focus on as well as what is obscured from

us. Harding and Wood (2003).

The researcher s standpoint is on the conflict women experience in cohabitating relationships

and the role mediation can play. The researcher believes it is important to understand how

women perceive themselves in these relationships, as theorized by Hartsock (1983). Standpoint

feminism is founded in Marxist ideology. Hartstock (1997) argued that a feminist standpoint

Comment [A16]: Rep h ra se this as th ere is adisconn e ct w ith th e a utho rs th a t pr oc ee d . Did yo

rea lly wa nt to say fe minist ra th er th an fe minism

Comment [A17]: This st a t e m e nt should bede le t e d o r y ou could p lace it in a section und ert er ms and def initions . This section should be a t

end o f you r int roduction and includ e opera tion adef in e d .

Comment [A18]: Rest ructu re this se nt e nc e.


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could be built out of Marxs understanding of experience and used to criticize patriarchal

theories.

The researcher believes that a females perspective on the conflicts experienced in cohabitational

relationship will clarify some of the preconceived ideologies, myths or dogma associated with

cohabitation. It is the belief of the researcher that issues about the social groups to which we

belong could shape what they know and how they communicate (. Harding and Wood (2003) .

OOn the other hand, Smith (1987) instructs us that in beginning to understand how our everyday

world is mediated to us, we will begin to understand that all of it determinates are observable in

the scope of direct experience. The researcher strongly believes that a case study of

cohabitation is a significant factor to accurately determine womens innermost thoughts. It will

also bring to the forefront information that is not readily observable .

Roloff (1981: 57) defines an equitable relationship, as one in which some persons perceives that

the relative gain of two people in an exchange are equal. In this study the researcher will seek to

explore if there is equity in the relationship. Equity Theory willattempt to explain relational

satisfaction in terms of perceptions of what is fair and what is unfairin thedistributions of

resources withinthe interpersonal relationships experience by the cohabitant. John Stacy Adams

(1962) stated that equity theory is considered as one of the justice theories. The belief is that

people value fair treatment which causes them to be motivated to keep the fairness maintained

within the relationships.

Social exchange theory proposes that social behavior is the result of an exchange

process, (Homans (1950-1961 ;)Blau (1964 ; ) Emerson (1972). The purpose of this exchange is to

maximize benefits and minimize costs. According to this theory, people weigh the potential

Comment [A19]: Wh y are y ou usin g th e w o rdbe lieve. I t ta kes away th e obje cti vit y in you r studT ry to refra in from usin g you r be lief s and op inions

Comment [A20]: Whil e this is you r be lief , younee d su pp o r tin g e m p irica l ev ide nc e.

Comment [A21]: This is not you r be lief th e n,you cit e d autho rs. Th eref o re y ou have agree d w ithis .


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benefits and risks of social relationships. The researcher is interested in understanding if women

in cohabitating relationships have conflicts because they perceive that their risk outweigh the

rewards, and they are therefore forced to terminate these relationships. In addition, the researcher

will explore other reasons that people engage in social exchange such as anticipated reciprocity,

expected gain in reputation and influence, altruism and perception of efficacy direct reward.

Homans (1958) Thibaut and Kelly (1959) and Blau (1964) argue that people make choices based

on self-interest, during interaction; they weigh the reward and cost of specific courses of action.

In life there is gave and take, although the balance is not always equal to some as what is given

and what is received sometimes vary significantly,Homans (1958) Thibaut and Kelly (1959) and

Blau (1964). The researcher will understand what happens in these cohabitating

relationships,when there is uneven exchange between cohabitating parties, and the researcher

will explore if thiswill lead to one party having more power over the other in the relationship.

Myths about Cohabitation

There is a myth that cohabitation increases chances of a happier marriage. Gallagher, (2000)

states that the cohabitating couples mistake the substitute for the real thing. She believes that the

young couples who cohabitate not only have to deal with broken hearts and shattered self-esteem

after breakup, but they are also faced with the possibility that the cohabitating relationship will

be the reason for the failure in their future marriages. Waite, (2000) supported this view of

Gallagher. She believes that cohabitation in the United States is short term and leads to a lack of

committed marriages. She believes that cohabiters are not really working in a partnership they

are being two separate people. It is the trading of freedom and low levels of commitment for

fewer benefits that you get from commitment.

Comment [A22]: U se a noth er w o r d inst ea d ound er st and .

Comment [A23]: This section should be a th ein th e lit era tu re rev iew.


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Another myth of cohabitation is the belief that Couples do not really need that piece of paper,

since it does not automatically make two people committed to each other. This is clearly untrue

because cohabitation is merely a tentative arrangement that lacks stability. Children, partners, the

community or the society cannot depend upon the relationship. Dunagan, (1993) presents the

other side of the argument: If there is no difference in your relationship, whats wrong with

adding one more symbol to your total commitment? he asked. He questioned the love of

cohabitation which says, I love you, but not enough to enter into a relationship that brings you

honour, respect and preserves your dignity.

Marco, (1997) examines the myth of cohabitation that states, It will enhance ones self esteem

and inner security. He provided a quote which sums up his studies, I slept with many, many

people trying to find love, to find self-worth. And the more people I slept with the less self-worth

I had. He says when you give yourself as pieces many people you are no longer whole and as

a consequence; you may actually feel less self-worth and inner security because parts of you are

missing.

Laws Governing Cohabitation

In Trinidad and Tobago Act NO 28 of 2000 may be cited as the Distribution of Estates Act 2000.

Part 1 of the Act is the Amendments to the Succession Act. It defines Cohabitational

relationship as the relationship between cohabitants, who not being married to each other have

lived together in a bonafide domestic relationship for a period of not less than five years

Comment [A24]: I am not su re w h ere this should be p laced but it should not be af ter o r parth e th e o ry. Simil ar to th e ab o ve comm e nt, I su ggthis should be a su bs ection in th e lit rev iew.


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immediately preceding the death of either cohabitant. This Act No 28 represents Amendment to

the Act No 30 of 1998 and makes provision for cohabiting couples.

. In this study the researcher will seek to find out how women cope with conflict. Some conflicts

may involve the application of the cohabitational laws of Trinidad and Tobago. In addition,

mediation will be introduced by the researcher to the cohabitant for those cases that can employ

mediation. These are some types of conflicts that may arise under the provision of the

Cohabitational Relationship Act; property ownership, responsibility for debt, custody or

visitation claims, physical or mental disability of a partner, maintenance, abuse, and incest.

Cohabiting parents need to have written parenting agreement; unmarried fathers must

acknowledge paternity by signing the birth certificate in Trinidad and Tobago, this facilitates

easier access to custody or visitation claims. All cohabiting individuals should be familiar with

the cohabitational laws that govern their relationships.

Research Questions

Based on the study these research questions were framed:

RQ1. Does outside influence have a part to play in the conflicts those women who cohabitate

experience?

RQ2. Does the length of time a couple cohabitate add to the frequency of when conflict occurs

in the relationship: and the way in which these conflicts are handled?

RQ3. Does the lack of communication between couples that cohabitate add to the conflict in the

relationship: or does it help minimize the conflict?


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RQ4 Does empowerment issues create conflict in the relationship of women that cohabitate: or

does it balance the relationship?

RQ5. Does financial empowerment create conflict in the relationships of women that

cohabitate?

RQ6. Does the expected change of status by women who cohabitate cause conflict in the

relationship.

Methodology Research Design

Qualitative research will be applied to this study to explore the conflict experienced by women

in cohabitating relationship: The Role of Mediation. Mile and Huberman (1994) outlined three

overall approaches to analysing qualitative data, for this study The Social Anthropology

approach which relies primarily on ethnography, in this approach the researcher will seek to

elicit from the participants detailed description by using a questionnaire and through focus

groups. Detailed data will be gathered through open ended questions that provide direct

quotations. The questions will be put asked to twenty women. In addition, the study will also

employ two focus groups will be done using comprising of women in cohabitating relationship


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from Trinidad.The researcher will seek regular patterns of human behaviour in data, usually

sifting, coding and sorting data as they are collected. In the focus group the researcher will be

following up analyses with on-going observation and interviews to explore and refine these

patterns, in what Goetz and Le Compte (1994) calls a recursive approach.

The researcher will act in the capacity of the interviewer since this will be an integral part of the

investigation, Jacob (1988). In the interviews the researcher will find out what conflicts women

in cohabiting relationship face and the role of mediation to help solve or alleviate these conflicts,

also what avenue they use to help solve their conflicts, and also there hopes for the future.

Sampling Method Recruitment

Qualitative research can improve the description and explanation of complex real world

phenomena pertinent to this study. Greater understanding of cohabitation individuals will be

given. Purposive Sampling strategies will be employed in selecting the participants. The

objective of this study is to acquire a sampling size of twenty women who will be the subject of

focus group. These women will represent various ethnic groups, race, age, education and socio

economic background from Trinidad. Each participant will be informed of the nature of the

research and the procedure to be followed, confidentiality will be discussed. Participants of the

focus group will exchange telephone numbers with researchers to .... .Date, time and location of

interviews will be arranged. All audio, visual aids will be collected by the researcher. A total of

three interviews will be conducted ranging from one to two hour with each participant, this will

allow the participants to develop a relationship with the researcher and build confidence in the

study. This will also improve the reliability, validity and e nhance the data.

Data Collection Procedures

Comment [A25]: This sent enc e n ee ds re st r uctu rin g.

Comment [A26]: Fo r w ha t pu rp os e?

Comment [A27]: Wha t do you m ea n byenh anc e th e da ta?


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Questions will be put to participants who represent a purposive sampling of people in Trinidad

of various ethnic groups, race, ages, education and socio-economic background; twenty

participants would answer the questions. Care will be taken to ensure that all questions are

understood and answered. In addition two focus groups will be carried out through Face to face

discussions. Field notes will also be taken and natural observation of continuing activity and

reactions will be recorded. These measures will ensure reliability which is an important

characteristic of behavioral measure.

Before the interview begins, both participants and interviewer will be formally introduced.

Ethical considerations will be discussed and participants will return the signed consent forms

which were given earlier . (See Appendix). Participants will be told that all information will be

held in the strictest confidence. At the end of each interview the researcher will collect all

materials, the audio tapes and field notes and keep this information in a locked file cabinet in her

office.

Data Analysis

Qualitative data are considered to be the rough material researchers collect from the world they

are studying; they are the particulars that form the basis of analysis (.Bogdan and Biklen,

(1992 ):106) .In this study the researcher will: read and review data, interview notes, transcripts,

notes from field observation and focus groups. Secondly , notes will be written as the researcher

review the field notes, transcripts, and questionnaires. Large margins will be drawn on each sheet

of paper so that notes can be made in the margin or key passages highlighted (. Bogdan and

Biklen (1992). Filed folders will be utilized to organize the data . , tT he data will then be

Comment [A28]: Cha nge this w o rd .


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coded,and themes will be identified within from the interview notes, questionnaires, field

observation that relate to the conflict experience by women in cohabitating relationships and the

role of mediation .

Themes such as if the duration of time cohabiting adds to the frequency of the conflicts, the

way in which these conflicts are dealt with, if outside influence played a part in the conflicts that

occur in cohabiting relationships, does the lack of communication in a cohabiting relationship

add to the conflict experienced by the women in the relationship , does empowerment issues

create conflict in a cohabitating relationship, does financial empowerment create conflict in the

cohabiting relationship, and does the expected or hope for change of status create conflict in the

cohabiting relationship, how women feel about not being married, whether they prefer to be

married and if there are plans to be married. The women views on these topics will be observed.

Data will be read multiple times to identify all the common ideas and patterns throughout the

research.

The researcher will interpret the data by attaching significance to the themes and patterns

observed. The researcher will then write a list of key themes and review the data again. T he

researcher will again consider alternative explanations by looking for differences in responses to

the questions and observation during the case focus group that was recorded in the data

collection.Finally a report will be drafted that details the researchers findings by synthesizing

and summarizing the data analysis. Since analyzing qualitative data is a subjective process, the

researcher will be concerned with her own biases throughout the analytical process.

Comment [A29]: This st a t e m e nt is lon g.

Comment [A30]: This st a t e m e nt is am b iguous

Comment [A31]:


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Findings


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Limitations

This study has some limitations. Firstly, time constraint will not permit the researcher to indulge

in a much larger population, or to interview people from Tobago as well as getting a broader

perspective of the study in Trinidad and Tobago. Additionally, focus groups the interviews on


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the other hand because they are face-to-face; there is a strong possibility that interviewers biases

may be present. Also respondents may feel uneasy about anonymity of their responses when they

interact face-to-face. However these problems at the interviews could be minimized by the

number of times the researcher interviews participants.

Conclusion

The objectives of this study are to explore the experiences of cohabitating relationships as seen

through the eyes of women. These women will have the opportunity to discuss the social and

economic dynamics in their cohabitating relationships. They will explain how they cope with

Comment [A32]: This st a t e m e nt is uncl ear.Consid er re st ructu ring this sent enc e.


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conflictin theirrelationship; these experiences can be evaluated through their reasons given for

cohabitating, the advantages and disadvantages, the pros and cons of cohabitation, the myths and

the laws governing cohabitation. Important issues are to be addressed; facts about cohabitation

need to be shared with the world stage. Politicians and Law makers need to understand the

suitability of the laws and access whether there may be options for legal reform. Mediation will

be introduced to the cohabitating women as a viable option for solving conflict.Recent estimates

show that forty five per cent of currently cohabiting women have children present in their

household (Casper and Cohen (2000). The findings of this research can provide valuable

information to current research and encourage other researchers to employ a larger scale

population in their study.


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APPENDIX

I have been asked to participate in a qualitative research study which looks at the experiences of

women in cohabitating relationships. I understand that as part of the study I will be asked some

questions about my experiences and views, as well as some general questions about myself. I

understand that by participating in this study, I may be able to assist in developing better services

for individuals in cohabitating relationships.

I understand that my involvement is voluntary and that I am free to abandon the study at any

time or refuse to answer any questions that make me uncomfortable. I understand that the

interview will be audio taped and will last just about 1hour and 30 minutes. I understand that

there are no incorrect answers.

I understand that all information is confidential and will only be used for research purposes. I

understand that no names shall be used and a number used in its place. The researcher and the

person doing the transcription alone will have access to this information.

I understand that all data will be secured in a locked file cabinet in the researchers office for a

minimum of three years, and will be destroyed after completion of the study. The researcher will

not release any information to anyone unless there is a possibility that there may be

consequences to myself or any other that I may mention in the interview.


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I have read this consent form and the researcher has answered, to the best of her ability, any

questions I may have an issue with or not totally understand. I understand that if I may have any

other concerns about my rights as a participant in this study I can at any time contact the

researcher Miss Sherry Ann Cummings at 1868-290-7912.

I have received a copy of this consent form.

Participants Signature: ___________________________________ Date: ____________

Researchers Signature: ___________________________________ Date: ____________

Procedures for Protecting Participants

I, ____________________________ will adhere to the following procedures to ensure

protection of participants.

I will introduce myself to the participants and tell them the purpose of the study.

I will also explain that I am not affiliated with any local agency, am accountable to The

University of the West Indies, Behavioral Sciences Department and the data


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Procedures

After screening participants, the Researcher ________________________ will conduct

interviews while also keeping field notes to capture body language, gesticulations, and other

variations in human behaviour not captured by audio taped interviews. Each interview will take

approximately (1) hour and thirty minutes. During the first fifteen (15) minutes, the Principal

Investigator will read the consent form to participants, which will give the purpose of the study,

confidentiality procedures, and their rights as participants. The last fifteen (15) minutes will be

left for debriefing. A small compensation would be given to the individual who volunteered to be

interviewed.


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