No.

3F

ree

PASS IT ON PLEASE, WELL USE LESS TREES

JOEY PAGESTEPHEN WRIGHT

arts and community magazine by epneo

WWW.THERELIANT.COM

ALL FIRED UP

THE RELIANTCAMBERWELL DULWICH PECKHAM

7ALEX ON:

The Mayoral election

8POTTY LOCAL

All Fired Up

10Q&A

Stephen Wright

12COMING UP

Events listings

16COVER STORY

Joey Page

20GALLERY

Local talent

24 GOING OUT

Reviews

25 RETURN FIRE

Game genres

26FUN STUFF

Competition & more

THE RELIANT 3

CONTENTS

5 WELCOME

Info and welcome

6 RELIANT REPORTS

Local views

Where friends meet...188 Rye Lane ,Peckham SE15 4NF

Tel : 07563482439

check us online @www.canavanspool.com

CALL TO ARRANGE YOUR EVENT GREAT RATES.

TABLE TENNIS, POOL CHAMPIONSHIPS,

LIVE DJS & FULLY STOCKED BAR LICENSED

UNTIL 4AM

Canavans Peckham Pool Club and Function Room

Follow us on Facebook ci8007@yahoo.com

EditorDavid Westeditor@thereliant.com

Head DesignerJames Westjames@epneo.com

AddressEpneo LimitedCamberwell Business Centre 99-103 Lomond GroveCamberwell, London,SE5 7HN

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AdvertisingDonnie Galiotjakisdonnie@epneo.com

PhotographyBenjamin Gleanbenjaminglean@gmail.com

Printed byThe Guardian Print CentreRick Roberts Way,London,E15 2GN

ContributorsAlex Michael, Michael Large, Matt Lloyd, Hugo Simms, Nick McNeill, Rob Halhead-Baker, Ariella Esposito, Gen Williams, & Dilesh Patel.

Subscription InformationThe Reliant subscriptions are available in the UK ONLY: 12 months (6 issues) = 10. To subscribe please send us a cheque payable to Epneo Limited along with your name and address.

epneo 2012

Hello and welcome to the 3rd issue of The Reliant.

Weve fully got into the swing of this magazine lark and have got an amazing issue lined up for you. We met up with Joey Page in a pub in New Cross to play foosball and discuss his flight of fantasy nonsense comedy. We also talked to Stephen Wright, the artist behind The House of Dreams, a unique life project inspired by childhood and the culture of Mexico. Spurred on by this youthful nostalgia we decided to crash an eight year

olds birthday party at All Fired Up the fantastic ceramics caf.

Not content taking over your reading time, we have decided to invade your night times by putting on a DJ and pool night at Canavans on 16th June. All proceeds go towards The Reliant Challenge 2012.

The Reliant is created by Epneo, a local design company that specialise in graphics, illustration, branding, websites and more. We hope you enjoy our third offering, and well see you again in August for the next one.

DaveDavid West, Editor

WELCOME

TO CONTRIBUTE PLEASE CONTACT:INFO@THERELIANT.COM

The Reliant Challenge 2012In 2012 we aim to raise 5000 for the Kings College Hospital Childrens Wards. We will be holding various events culminating in our Autumn Festival 2012!

Please support us by giving whatever you can and by coming to our events!

For more info please contact us at: info@thereliant.com

The Reliant is proud to support Kings College Hospital

Donate at: uk.virginmoneygiving.com/thereliant

togetherwecan.org.uk

The recently closed Ivy House pub in Nunhead, now at the centre of a community campaign to re-open it, was at the forefront of the 1970s pub-rock movement that paved the way for punk. Then called The Newlands Tavern, it was the only South London venue providing that kind of live music. Last year I had the pleasure of meeting the couple who ran it between 1972 and 1976, Reg and Sue Fentiman, who told me about their time at The Newlands.

Ian Dury liked steak and kidney pudding, Sue told me. He used to go to the fridge and feed himself, added Reg. Half the bands always looked half starved when they came. We always gave them something to eat, continued Sue. To us Ian was always superb. He was with Kilburn and The High Roads then. It was just incredibly successful. Sometimes behind that bar wed have about ten people serving. We never booked a band without hearing them first.

Other regular performers included pub-rock luminaries such as Dr Feelgood, Brinsley Schwarz and The Kursaal Flyers. Also appearing on The Newlands stage during this time were Elvis Costellos Flip City, Hugh Cornwalls pre-Stranglers group, Johnny Sox and Joe Strummers pre-Clash, The 101-ers.

They were always so polite, said Sue of these forbearers of punk. They obviously used to get so much hassle from other people. All we used to say was, when you pack up, if you could load your van as quietly as possible.

The Ivy House has a lonesome location at the brow of Stuart Roads slight hill. There used, however, to be a row of shops on the south side of the road between the pub and Peckham Rye. It was a thriving pub in the thirties, said Sue. Then, in the late afternoon of July 1st 1944 a German V1 bomb crashed into the shops, killing seventeen people. Every building between The Newlands Tavern and the Rye was totally destroyed or damaged beyond repair. The pub was unscathed. Incidentally, this present building, built in the early 1930s and now Grade II listed, was not the first Newlands Tavern.

There has been a pub of that name, at the same address, since possibly the 1870s.

It is largely due to the Fentimans hard work in the seventies that the pub enjoys its reputation as a hallowed musical landmark. Two months ago, The Fentimans and their family returned to the pub that had been their home for the first time in 36 years as guests of honour. It was the perfect Sunday pub afternoon - convivial company, great food and ale, laid-back jazz - an example of one of the many things that the pub was doing so well. We all hope that it gets the chance to continue the good work very soon.

Hugo Simms

6 THE RELIANT

RELIANT REPORTSSADNESS AS IVY HOUSE CLOSES

The Newlands Tavern, 1880s

A message from Nick McNeill- Former manager of The Ivy House

At the end of April The Ivy House was boarded up. Lots of amazing people are working very hard to make sure that the story doesn't end here.

If you want to help, please just keep spreading the word. I've overheard people discussing the Ivy House who didn't even know it existed until a few weeks ago - it's beginning to take on an almost mythical status to some (one it fully deserves in my opinion).

Money will be the next big step - start getting on the good side of any wealthy friends you may have and get ready for big fundraising announcements soon.

To keep up to date with The Ivy House:www.savetheivyhouse.orgFacebook: savetheivyhouseTwitter: save_ivy_house

The Ivy House was a cracking venue. Totally original with a fantastic stage and soundsystem. The history of it alone is amazing!Bob

THE RELIANT 7

ALEX ON: THE MAYORAL ELECTION

A Manifesto For The Mayor Of London

When this edition of The Reliant goes to print, there will be a new mayor of London. It seemed to me that Londoners need more choice in who they want deciding where the best place for a new bus stop should be With that in mind, I have included the draft manifesto for the Vote Aliospalio campaign. I expect that as you read this, I will already be in power and in the process

of designing a new uniform for our beloved traffic wardens:

Public Transport As Mayor, I propose making public transport a little more fun. No one likes staring at your glum face whilst you are waiting at Camberwell Green bus stop on a Monday morning! How will I liven up your travelling experience? Simple. When you press your Oyster card up against a reader, instead of being told the charge made to the card, you will be greeted with witty comment or insult on the display. There will not be a sad face in the city. Here are some examples: The driver of this bus has a criminal record or Being late for work is your right!. and so on.

Waste Disposal This is an easy one. When I spoke to the residents of this fair city (editors note: He spoke to 4 people in a queue at the local off license) I soon learned that waste collection was a big problem for Londoners. My solution? Lets go back to dumping our household waste back into the Thames. I hear that the river flows pretty fast these days and think of all the money well save on getting rid of the bin men!

The Third Runway Lets face it, London is a

busy city. People fly from all over the world to London just so they can sample the fine pub lunches of South East London. We do need a third runway but why build a new one when you have more than adequate landing strips all around us! I am, of course, talking about the M25. Lets be honest, no one really uses it. I propose letting flights land on the M25 and if you are especially nice to the pilot, they will land to the junction nearest to your destination. Personally, I think this one is an election winner!

Health Service Another no brainer. LOYALTY CARDS! Break a leg, get it seen to and get a stamp on a card as you are being discharged. Pop into your local caf and get a free coffee! The Aliospalio campaign is rewarding you for getting hurt! Youre welcome!

Ok thats it, I think. Thank you for the vote which I am sure you casted for me I appreciate any feedback Just make it short. Im probably very busy.

VOTE ALIOSPALIO. PROGRESS MIGHT BE HIS MIDDLE NAME!

Tweet Alex @aliospalio

Best gig venue- The Word On The Street

I saw Massive Attack at the Brixton Academy. It has it all. What a great venue!Maryam

The Montague Arms in New Cross is awesome fun. It is run by oldies who open at 7am! It is quite psychedelic and even serves cup cakes.Charlie

If you want a good vibe then Brixton Jam is it. When you have had too much to drink you can go outside and get a cup of tea.Jamie-Lee

Great community spirit at Hoopers and the Goose Green festival. Local businesses and produce is what makes them personal and makes you feel a part of it.Zoe

After the loss of the infamous Ivy House we decided to hit the streets and find out where in the area youve seen your best gig ... OUR 2012

CHARITYKings College Hospital treats and cares for more than 40,000 sick children every year. They have a dedicated childrens critical care centre, a day care unit, a busy outpatient department and four inpatient wards.Their childrens neurosurgery unit has the best specialist doctors, nurses and pharmacists and the childrens liver unit is the largest of its kind in the world.

Donations help to ensure children get the best care and treatment possible.

Because together we can help children recover.

Experiencing Maroon Town at Hootananys was great. Lively atmosphere, people mixing together and Jerk chicken to eat, mmmmm.Clare

POTTY LOCAL

8 THE RELIANT

The average caf visit can get a bit boring. Once youve ploughed through a slice of cake and your caffeinated beverage of choice, there isnt really much to do. You could talk but I always find once the tea has dried up, so does the conversation due to that unwritten rule, which makes you feel like a thief if you are taking up a seat without a drink on the go.

All Fired Up takes away this age-old problem by giving you a selection of blank ceramics to unleash your creativity. I havent painted for about ten years because I, like a fool, never did anything art related past junior school. Despite this dormant period, I took to painting like a wild toddler. The enthusiasm was definitely there, but the results were a long way from Rembrandt comparisons.

The best thing about working here is seeing the amazing things that come out of peoples minds and onto cups and plates, says manager, Sarah Langford. My favourite one recently was a five year old who drew loads of spiders and a robot saying, I didnt even know I liked techno.

The caf gets a large range of customers, from art students creating elaborate designs to three-day-old babies with their mums who want to record their tiny footprints.

Its really addictive because you think, Ill do that mug for my Mum and then when you come to collect it youll see a car and think, my Dad will definitely like that, says Sarah.

When collecting our freshly fired up creations, we noticed there was a birthday celebration in full swing and because were party animals we thought wed join the revelry.

Ruby was celebrating her eighth birthday for which she had already received a necklace and a rounders set, despite her birthday being next Friday (a breach of the birthday rules, which I let slide seeing as she was polite enough to turn a blind eye to us turning up uninvited).

John Worne who was supervising the shindig said, The kids love it. Our offspring have brought back a number of things which we use all the time. And because they are fired, the things they paint are stronger, so you end up with something that lasts longer than a day.So whether youre a three-day-old baby, or a fellow party crasher, All Fired Up is a great place to spend an afternoon relaxing with a cup of tea and a whole lot of paint. PS If youre reading this in a regular caf and have been pretending to sip a centimetre of macchiato for the last half an hour, shame on you!

Its not every day that you order a pot of tea and it comes with a paintbrush, unless of course youre a regular customer at All Fired Up, the brilliant ceramics caf on East Dulwich Road.

Children enjoying Rubys Birthday party

All Fired

Up

34 East D

ulwich R

oad,

East Dul

wich, Lon

don,

SE22 9AX

allfiredu

pcerami

cs.co.uk

phone: 02

0 8299 077

1

Painting like a wild toddler

24 Camberwell Church Street, Camberwell, London, SE5 8QU

SOPHOCLES BAKERY

Tel: 020 7252 6316

& PATISSERIE

Fresh bread and sandwiches, sweet and savoury products, and cakes for all occasions.

10 THE RELIANT

When did this project start?It started ten years ago. I had been a designer for a long time doing various things. I had a stationary company designing gift-wrap and cards for Harrods and Selfridges, but I never really fitted in. I then saw a program Jarvis Cocker was doing on outsider art and I was really excited and thought Ive come home, Ive found my family. I decided to sell my stationary business. I wanted to make a statement because Im capable of doing a lot more. There was a gap of two years through bereavement and I stopped because I thought, I dont know if I want to continue this. But, Ive actually fed all of that into what Im doing now and its made it much more poignant. Then I approached National Trust, who are going to take the house over when Im not here any more. Theyve given me some money and the house will be left to the nation, its sort of a life project really.

&Q A with Stephen WrightThe house is unlike anything Ive ever seen, where did you get your inspiration? Living in England for me is not inspiring in any way really. It does give me the freedom to do what I want, but visually it doesnt do a lot for me. I need to look to cultures where I get colour and pattern and ceremonial stuff, which is what I need. We dont have that in England its dead, its boring. So therefore this is about dealing with my environment. Mexico is a big influence on me. When I go to Mexico, its like Im going home. My connection with the country is really strong and I know Ive been there in a former life. This house is a safety womb, a protection for whats going on outside. Its a shrine where I feel safe, its about my childhood, its about people that Ive known, people that I know, theres lots of messages going on if you take the time to look and read. Its about bereavement and loss and losing people, so it moves people into that area of being upset and thats fine because thats what its supposed to do. I think its very honest and people respond to that. Do you ever feel trapped or overwhelmed by the project?I quite like things to be difficult thats my nature. I like the battle, the mental battle. I do escape it sometimes. I dont always live here; I sometimes go to a friends house to get away and then come back to work. Ultimately I love being here, but you fall out with it. Sometimes you think, What am I doing? But its really the right thing to be doing, to make a statement. Its something I have to do; its as simple as that. Are you now more fulfilled, compared to when you were designing stationary?Thats a good question. I think I am but its never enough, I expect a lot of me and itll never be completed. This will be going forever, Ill be doing this until I cant breath. Eventually I think it will go upstairs. I might have to live in the garden in a little mosaic house. What do you look for when you are in a market?When I collect things from other locations its the fact that theyre a bit soiled, or dirty. I love dirty combs with hair and things. Its that connection, thats the bit I like. Things are not perfect, because life isnt. Everything is here for a reason, its not to fill a gap. Its here because it gives me a feeling or emotion. Whether its tacky or a memory of a day when I was with someone that meant something to me.

Doing car boot sales is like an illness, I need to handle stuff, I need to bring stuff home. Its about the bartering and the relationship with the person behind the counter. I like the hunting very much, its exciting. I go to Paris or other places where theres still loads of crappy markets where you can buy really good stuff. They dump it on the pavement and you have to get on your knees and go through it.

How has your work progressed?My work has changed a lot. Im sort of going back to childhood really. In lots of ways, trying to get rid of all my education. Going back to when I was little and I used to put colours together because I liked them, theres no theory. It takes a while to get to that point to be that loose, but thats where its going really.

I try to work in a state when I dont know what Im doing. If its working and running smoothly, then I mess it up because I dont want to plan. I like that it just emerges from somewhere. I shut myself off for a while, the phone comes off for days, the doors are locked and Im just left alone. Its an emotional experience, its quite tiring, but I enjoy being tired. Its quite perverse really.

Steve Wright is the artist behind the House of Dreams, a unique ongoing life project that has to be seen to be believed. We met up with him to find out why he sold his stationary business and started sifting for second hand combs.

THE RELIANT 11

House of

Dreams

45 Melbo

urne Gro

ve

East Dul

wich

SE22 8RG

stephenw

rightarti

st.co.uk

I quite like things to be difficult, thats my nature. I like the battle, the mental battle.

What pushes you on to continue with the house? My work is about opening the boxes. Weve all got the boxes in our heads that sometimes we dont want to go into, well I quite like going in mine, its quite interesting! You have to be quite brave sometimes to open boxes I think. Every day is the first day, thats how it feels. Ive done quite well over the years but it doesnt mean anything to me. I wanted to achieve a certain level of respect, its not about the money, its about the respect of who you are. Its about having no regrets in your life.

The House of Dreams is open to the public on 2nd June, 7th July, 4th August and 1st September.

Entrance is 10.

Stephen can be contacted on 0208 299 3164 and by email on steveparis50@yahoo.co.uk

Dulwich Picture GalleryGallery Road, Dulwich, SE21 8AD

Andy Warhol: The Portfolio20th June 16th SeptemberThis exhibition will feature some of Warhols most iconic print portfolios as well as lesser known sets. Portfolios on display will include the Muhammad Ali Portfolio and the Myths Portfolio produced six years before the artists death in 1987.

Philip Haas: The Four Seasons20th June 16th SeptemberA set of four monumental fibreglass sculptures by American artist and filmmaker Philip Haas. The installation in the Gallerys gardens will be the first ever public display of all four works following their completion.

South London Gallery65 Peckham Road, Camberwell, SE5 8UH

Stephen Willats: Surfing with the Attractor1st June 15th JulyHis first South London Gallery exhibition in 1998, entitled Changing Everything, brought together a body of work made in partnership with local residents over a two-year period. Willats re-presents material from Changing Everything alongside a new installation featuring a huge data stream spanning 15 metres and made in collaboration with 14 London-based artists.

Dulwich Library368 Lordship Lane, Dulwich, SE22 8NA

Poetry Relay9th 14th JulyYoung people aged 11 to 16 years write an Olympic themed poem for Southwark.

Hoopers Bar28 Ivanhoe Road, East Dulwich, SE5 8DH

Free Comedy Night10th June, Doors 7pm, Show 8pmPatrick Monahan (Edinburgh Preview) Paul Sweeney, Marc Burrows, Dan Schreiber, Sami Stone and MC Sion James

Locations in Camberwell

Camberwell Arts Festival16th 24th JuneTaking art out of the studio and into the street from pubs to parks, cafes to crypts, shops to swimming pools.

Camberwell College of Arts45 - 65 Peckham Road, Peckham, SE5 8UF

Open House23rd JuneHands on creative activities for all ages.

Camberwell Green

Camberwell Farmers MarketFirst Saturday every month, 10am 1pmA variety of food stalls.

Peckham Space89 Peckham High Street, Peckham, SE15 5RS

Double Vision by Gayle Chong KwanRunning until 29th JulySculpture installation which invites visitors to explore the sensory experiences of a fantastical, mythical landscape.

Peckham Square

Lindy-Tap Street8th July, 1pm, 1.30pm, 2pm, 2.30pmIntergenerational dance piece by Theatre Peckham. A fusion of Charleston and Hip Hop. Audience participation encouraged.

Franks Cafe95a Rye Lane, Peckham, SE15 4ST

Bold Tendecies30th June 30th SeptemberPeckhams annual international sculpture show and multi arts events programme, with Franks Cafe.

12 THE RELIANT

COMING UP

Andy Warhol: The PortfolioPhilip Haas: The Four Seasons

The quick, simple and tasty food at Dulwich Tandoori makes it a must for me.Kate

The Word On The StreetsThe Reliant wanted to know the best takeaway in town...

When it comes to a great crispy duck at the right price, Mr Lius Chinese is a winner.Angus and Ali

Really enjoy Hisar. Lovely food and a good get away from the wife.Carl

I love Surma in Dulwich. Lovely food with a good service.Joe

Rice and Peas on Grove Vale is a huge favourite of mine. It does the job of my Caribbean comforts.Derrick

The Bussey Building133 Rye Lane, Peckham, SE15 4ST

PRIME: 10 Contemporary Painters11th 15th June 2012The artists involved in PRIME seek to reexamine established ideas about the painted form and the traditional relationship between work and exhibition space. A central theme is the space of the painted surface and its interaction with both the viewer and the situated environment, whilst other works will explore the physicality of the medium itself.

Arcadia MissaUnit 6, Bellenden Road, Peckham, SE15 4RF

The Survival Series: Open Office29th June onwardsA programme of exhibitions, talks and events in response to a transparent research project.

Peckham Library122 Peckham Hill Street, Peckham, SE15 5JR

Paper Solo23rd JunePaper Solo is a performance collaboration between choreographer Rosie Heafford and visual artist Josie Davis.

Burgess ParkAlbany Rd, SE5

Welcome Back Burgess Park Open Day21st JulyDiscover all thats new in one of our wonderful parks.

Elephant and Castle Shopping CentreElephant and Castle, SE1 6SD

2012 and Jamaica at 50 Celebration15th July, 12pm 6pmEnjoy music, dance, arts and photography.

THE RELIANT 13

I adore Fujiyama. I highly recommend the Sushi to go along with the friendly service.Sonia

Franks Cafe

THE RELIANT PRESENTS

Co Founder of one of Londons most established Club Nights Church, Seb Wildblood has wasted no time in getting his name about. From Features in Mixmag to headlining a show in Berlin, he is definitely one to watch in the latter half of this year.

Church are set to host a stage at Dimensions Festival this year, along with shows in Brighton, Amsterdam, Ibiza, Gent and of course, London. Church will launch as a Label in July, this is only set to up Seb Wildbloods stock.

Expect, House, Bass, Techno, Garage and anything in between.

www.churchldn.co.ukwww.facebook.com/jamestittensor

Saturday 16th June brings together a collection of great DJs in Canavans Pool Club, Peckham. All proceeds go to The Reliant Challenge 2012 (see page 5 and 27). Below is an insight into the individuals who are giving up their time for a great cause. The night will be full of great music, pool and prizes, we hope to see you all there.

Seb Wildblood

Piri Piri is the combined efforts of 3 producers and close friends. Hailing from Spain, Manchester and Birmingham, they combine the influences of their hometowns and origins with those of their base of operations, London, to create a sound built for dance floor chaos.

Coming from diverse musical backgrounds, they are known for driving crowds into a frenzy with their eclectic and unpredictable DJ sets, known for mixing up genres and effortlessly combining forgotten classics with bleeding-edge exclusive tunes. Combine this with a breathtaking full live set that includes live bass, percussion, keys and more, and you have a creative force that have left many a jaw dragging on the floor. A debut EP forthcoming on Sounds Of Sumo, alongside a blockbuster remix package, these are a crew you dont want to lose sight of!

www.facebook.com/piripirimusic

Piri Piri

14 THE RELIANT

Late Lunchs finest, Kani + Milli have gone from strength to strength this year playing diversely exciting high energy sets, theres nothing these guys dont play! They are best known for bringing the weighty baselines, mixing up alot of UK grime with dubstep. You can probably expect a cheeky bit of bassline chucked in there somewere for good measure. Not a set to be missed!

www.facebook.com/milliandkani

Kani + Milli

Sepia is an upcoming producer and dj based in south east London. Having just had his debut EP released, and with another 2 just been picked up, he is a name to watch out for, with his high octane cross genre sets and intricate productions.

Having been on the bill with some of the UK Bass scenes greatest, he is on his way to becoming a fresh talent out of the underground scene

www.facebook.com/sepiamusicuk

Sepia

Fresh from Hong Kong Subcoat is always delivering a big sound, he is a mixed bag always serving up fresh new tunes. He definitely knows how to bring the party vibes playing alot of house and future sounds. Hes very close with the lads at Late Lunch, throwing in a bit of deep medi here and there for good measure. Ladies and Gentlemen we give you Subcoat!

www.facebook.com/subcoat

Subcoat

THE RELIANT 15

JOEY PAGE

16 THE RELIANT

Sitting with a Ken (his name for a half pint in honour of Ken Barlows measure of choice), Joey has noticed a change in his audience since going on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, Ive got loads of 14 year old girls that come to my gigs, which is great but they dont get a lot of my references, they dont even know who He-Man is.

Joeys comedy blends everyday familiarity with an escalating fantastical twist. I try to start my surreal stuff in the real world and go off somewhere else, otherwise people cant get a grip on it.

His ridiculous imagination is kept in check by great delivery and word play, which adds a lot of subtlety, catching you off guard. Its flight of fantasy nonsense, explains Joey. I have a joke about what would happen if I went to the gym and just worked on one arm. Sometimes people dont get it and just sit there thinking, This is not good at all!

This was by no means his intended career path, I never wanted to be a stand up, says Joey. I would much rather be in a band, but Ive got no rhythm and I cant sing so that rules me out of any of that.

Whilst studying Media Writing at Greenwich University, he saw Noel Fielding doing late night stand-up on Paramount. I had no desire to be a stand up until I saw him, and it clicked. It was completely different to anything Id ever seen.

Joey started gigging and hasnt looked back since. Thinking his parents would be annoyed at his newly acquired unused degree, he says his parents were surprisingly supportive. Joey recounts his Dad, a proper cockney, hard looking geezer giving him advice to make sure youve got a plan, then if doesnt work, stop.

Hes stuck to his plan and is now getting regular paid shows on the notoriously tough comedy circuit. Ive just moved to Brighton with my girlfriend up until then I was living with my parents in Bexley Heath, says Joey. As I got older it got more and more embarrassing to say that I was still living with them.

Eccentricity seems to run through the Page family. Joey describes his brother as basically like Alan Partridge but 25. When choosing a team to play a season with on Fifa, he weighed up the options of being someone not too good, but not too shit and eventually settled on Portsmouth because he likes shipping ports. He now actively supports them in real life, laughs Joey. I pretend to be quite eccentric but he actually is in a completely different way.

Joey Page is an up and coming comic who specialises in the surreal side of everyday life. We met up with him in New Cross to find out how to blag your way onto Buzzcocks and why you should never challenge Ronnie Wood to a game of rock-paper-scissors. They dont even know who He-Man is.

18 THE RELIANT

Noel Fielding, star of The Mighty Boosh has played a big part in Joeys career. When I started out I got compared to him, but it didnt bother me, its a massive complement, says Joey. More importantly, he doesnt think Im copying him.

After supporting Noel for the first time, he tapped Joey on the shoulder and said in his trademark whimsical manner, theres not many people about like us, were like unicorns, weve got to stick together.

I gave him my number then lo and behold a month later he text me: alright junior how are you getting on? Hes massively helped me, he gave me loads of advice and made me a hundred times better at stand up, hes just the nicest man.

Joey says in his last interview he moaned about the lack of opportunity for comedians that arent the Saturday night, suited, with a shiny stage with their name in lights kind of thing. But since, he has starred in Fieldings psychedelic sketch show Luxury Comedy and after Noel pulled a few strings, landed a spot on the notorious music quiz Never Mind The Buzzcocks where he was described as so new we havent got any footage of him.

There seems to be a growing community of comedians in London; every Tuesday Joey plays football with a gang of them including Pappys, Andy Zaltzman, Daniel Kitson, and Tim Key. Ive been getting Noel to come. Hell meet me in his football shorts with his Mars milk. Well have a cup of tea then go and play football.

If you miss a horrendous chance you have to wear a pink shirt with loser written on the back. Ive been wearing it for a few weeks. Ive got a quick brain but my legs dont work.

A month ago he did a gig with Ronnie Wood in the audience. Not one to let a chance like that go, Joey challenged him to a game of rock-paper-scissors. He didnt know what it was! Instead, Wood proposed a game of knuckles. I wasnt going to punch his knuckles, laughs Joey. I said, If I break your hand then I owe you millions of pounds in lost income. So then he just constantly punched me in the hand whilst I was telling jokes!

Joey is on the edge of success in a profession thats tough to crack. Hes started doing work experience at XFM to learn to use the board so he can make a tape and generate some more interest. With a couple of TV appearances and a whole lot of talent under his belt, hes definitely one to look forward to in the future and hopefully it wont be long before he can switch his pink shirt with loser on the back for a shiny stage with his name in lights.

tweet Joe

y:

twitter.c

om/thejo

eypage

Well have a cup of tea and go and play

football.

20 THE RELIANT

THEGALLERY

The Gallery is a hotbed of talent for students, graduates and local artists to show off their best work. To show off your work in The Reliants gallery, please contact us at info@thereliant.com. Exclusive Reliant badges will be given to all artists in the gallery (Blue Peter style).

Rob Halhead-Baker

Studying interaction and moving Image at London College of Communication.

robhalhead@hotmail.co.uk

See www.flickr.com/photos/robhalhead for more of Robs work.

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Ariella Esposito

Local Artist studying at Central St Martins

ariellaesposito@hotmail.co.uk

See www.ariella-maria.blogspot.co.uk for more of Ariellas work.

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Gen Williams

Local artist

gencwilliams@googlemail.com

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Dilesh Patel

Studying at London College of Communication.

dilesh_patel@live.co.uk

See cargocollective.com/dileshpatel for more of Dileshs work.

READING OUTCuriosity: How Science Became Interested in Everything by Philip BallRye Books

We went to the delightful Rye Books to hear Philip Balls reading of his new book Curiosity: How Science Became Interested in Everything. Ball is a prolific science writer, having authored books on the nature of water, pattern formation in the natural world, colour in art, and the science of social and political philosophy.

His latest book provides a social history of human inquisitiveness, which leads to a much more colourful and deep history than you would first assume. Through this investigation of curiosity, Ball also explores the scientific revolution; he talks of the original fear of curiosity brought about by religion right up to our curiosity fuelled experiments with the Large Hadron Collider below Switzerland.

Ball also questions how this fascination for research lead by curiosity affects the future of science. He explains, the book examines how the potential insatiability and harmful temptations of curiosity were tamed, and how its difficult sibling, wonder, was disciplined and at what cost in either case.

GOINGOUT

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WALKING OUT Stik WalkDulwich

In a unique collaboration, street artist Stik has reinterpreted paintings from the Dulwich Picture Gallery with his distinctive stick figures. The works can be found on the streets of Dulwich and take a fresh look at art by making it as accessible as possible by freeing it from the constraints of a gallery.

Putting himself out of his comfort zone, Stik took inspiration from fine art by the likes of Thomas Gainsborough and Pieter Coecke van Aelst. He strips back the original paintings, focusing just on the physicality and emotions of the subjects. Paying a lot of attention to weight distribution and subtleties, he manages to create a lot of depth using just six lines and two ovals for eyes.

The collaboration also brought up an unlikely friendship between Stik and Project Co-ordinator, Ingrid Beazley. The pair bounced off each other during the tour around the works, retelling stories of the projects process including finding the Dulwich palette in a trendy paint shop in Brick Lane to create what Stik joked was suburban art.

The Reliant guide to going out will help you get off that sofa and discover a hidden gem down your road. More available on our website: www.thereliant.com

ACTING OUT Fagins Last HourMichael Croft Theatre

Fagins Last Hour is a gripping adaption of Dickens well-loved Oliver Twist. It depicts Fagin pacing around his cell, mind unravelling in his last hour of life before being executed. The one-man show is adapted and performed by the multi award-winning James Hyland.

Ive always been interested in the character of Fagin, says Hyland. Most adaptations although very entertaining have

not always been true to the novel.

At the end of the most famous adaptation, Oliver! The Musical, Fagin walks into the sunset with Dodger, when in Dickens original the ending is a lot grimmer; Dodger is exiled to Australia and Fagin is put to death.

Hyland lays bare Fagins character in all his complexities,

Hes not the stock stage version, not a happy go lucky cheeky chap, but a horrible human being. However, he is quick to point out that Dickens wasnt using Fagin to persecute the poor. Dickens asks the question what made him like he is, says Hyland. The first choice on offer for the extremely poor is that they can go to the workhouse. However, people loathed it so much they would rather starve on the streets or resort to crime.

The adaption is highly engaging, with Hyland giving

an intense performance as Fagin, a man in visible agony as he replays the build up to his arrest. Hylands intricate subtleties in body language are impressive, faultlessly switching between characters in Fagins recollections. You really do feel like you are watching a man pushed to the edge, as he cycles through remorse, guilt, anger and fear with the tension rising to a very powerful ending.

RETURN FIREGame Genres A Human Profile

Human behaviour has been a controversial topic for all of our existence. Many a science type has taken a generous grant and wasted it down pointless avenues of research. For them (and you), we have used the medium of video games to characterise the type of game that certain people like to play and therefore what sort of life they can expect to live. Here it is and it cost you, the tax payer, nothing.

Shooters (also known as the First Person Shooter) These are the most common type of gamer. They like to shoot stuff but unlike what we are constantly being told by our peers, these people are not killers and murderers. Interestingly the shooter fan likes to shop at different supermarkets rather that stick to the same one. They

are tolerant of noise and will buy at least one copy of the big issue a year. Their favourite soup is Minestrone and when it rains, they prefer a hood to the umbrella. The type of job that shooters do include geophysicists, swimming pool filter cleaners and defence ministers for impoverished countries.Celebrity Shooters Wayne Rooney, Rolf Harris, Winston Churchill

Role Playing Gamers These guys are a complex bunch. Typically quite angry, recent surveys showed that the majority of rioters like a good RPG. They tend to have difficulty in relationships seeing as they dont seem to understand the need to share washing up duties at home. As children, the RPG player would like nothing better than to help an old person to

cross the road even if there is not the promise of a Boy Scout badge at the end of it. RPG-ers are happiest when stacking shelves, fishing the North Sea and distributing leaflets.Celebrity Role Players Prince(the artist formerly known as), David Cameron, Justin Bieber

Flight Simulator Types We fear these people. Always scheming

and making plans, they tend to hoard vouchers and get the sort of store discount that gave the economic crisis momentum. FS types a will always turn left at a T-junction and will blame any car passenger if it was the wrong turning. Conversely, when they age, grand children will always receive monetary gifts instead clothes from FS types. I dated a Flight Simulator fan once. She had frizzy hair. The day time job of the Flight Simulator Type includes an air hostess, supply teacher and X-ray machine operator.Celebrity Flight Simulator Types George of the Jungle, Jenson Button, the guy who played Morpheus in The Matrix

That will do for now. Free research isnt easy and I think my dinner is ready. Feel free to use the above in your university dissertation if it is relevant.

Alex and Mike present Return Fire Podcast live every week. Past shows can also be downloaded from iTunes and their website: www.returnfirepodcast.com

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VIEWING OUT1st Year Final ShowCamberwell College of Art

Is Rolf a shooter?

We went down to Camberwell College of Arts to look at the first year students final show. As you would expect, the work was incredibly varied and inventive and the wine was all gone before we arrived, it seems nothing changes.

FUN STUFF

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MYSTERY PICTURE COMPETITIONWIN TWO TICKETS TO ALLEYNs INTERNATIONAL

CONCERT SERIES (see page 2)Name the location of this photograph. The winner will be picked at random on 15th June and notified by email. Send entries to the address listed on page 5 or email: info@thereliant.com with the subject Competition. COMPETITION CLOSES 15TH JUNE!

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