The Pulse 8.48 » Dec. 1-7, 2011

CHATTANOOGA’S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE » NEWS • MUSIC • ARTS • ENTERTAINMENT » dECEmbER 1-7, 2011 • chattanoogapulse.com

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chattanoogapulse.com • december 1-7, 2011 • the pulse • 3

EdITORIALPublisher Zachary coopermanaging Editor Janis hashe Contributing Editor gary pooleArt director Bill RamseyContributors Rick Baldwin • Rob Brezsny Dave castaneda • chuck crowder • michael crumbJohn DeVore • allison gorman • sandra KurtzRick pimental-habib • matt Jones • D.e. langleyKelly lockhart • ernie paik • Jim pfitzer • Bill Ramseyalex teach • tara VPhotographerslesha patterson • Josh langInterns Beth miller • Bruno araujo

AdVERTISINGSales director lysa greer Account Executives Rick leavell • michelle pih

CONTACT Phone 423.265.9494 • Fax 423.266.2335Email [email protected]@chattanoogapulse.comGot a stamp? 1305 carter streetchattanooga, tn 37402

LETTERSplease limit letters to 300 words or less. letters to the editor must include name, address and daytime phone number for verification. the pulse reserves the right to edit letters for space and clarity.

THE FINE PRINT the pulse is published weekly by Brewer media and is dis-tributed throughout the city of chattanooga and surrounding communities. the pulse covers a broad range of topics concen-trating on culture, the arts, entertainment and local news. the pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. no person without written permission from the publishers may take more than one copy per weekly issue. the pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

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ContentsdEC. 1-7 • 2011 • ISSUE 8.48

COVER STORY

Poor Next door Chattanooga’s boom is bypassing the city’s working poor. by Janis Hashe and Cody maxwell. » 9

SCREEN

Feel The ForceJohn deVore reviews new star Wars book, finds it a treat for the obsessed. » 25

THE LIST

World Heavyweight Chili Championship• There are chili cookoffs and then there is the 3rd Time’sThe Charm World Heavyweight Chili Championship. This andmuch more happens for 24 hours Saturday, December 3,during the annual MainX24 party on the Southside.The List » Page 15

cover photo by Lesha Patterson

Holiday cash for your junk. Appliances • Junk Cars • Brass/Copper/Steel/AluminumScrap Metal • Industrial Demo • Roll-off Containers

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NEWS • VIEWS • RANTS • RAVESUPdATES » chattanoogapulse.com FACEbOOK/chattanoogapulse

tHeBoWLNumber of registered voters during March 2009 City of Chattanooga Municipal Elections: 103,747

Number of registered voters who voted during March 2009 election: 18,773

Percentage of registered voters who voted during the election: 18.09%

Number of registered voters who voted for a mayoral candidate during the election: 17,913

Votes cast for Ron Littlefield: 10,234 (57.13%)

Votes cast for Rob Healy (Littlefield’s closest competitor): 7,186 (40.12%)

Number of months after the election the required number of recall petitions were submitted to Hamilton County Election Commission: 17

Number of signatures required for a recall according to state law: 15,562 (or 15% of 103,747 registered voters at time of election)

Number of signatures required for recall by city charter: 8,816 (or 50% of 17,913 votes cast for mayor during election)

Number of signatures submitted by recall petitioners: 14,078

Number of signatures submitted by recall petitioners validated by Hamilton County Election Commission: 9,903

Difference between registered voters who voted for Littlefield and total of those who signed a recall petition: 3,844

Difference between registered voters who voted for Littlefield and validated signatures of those who now want him recalled: 331

Percentage difference between those who voted for Littlefield and valid recall signatures certified to recall him: 10.5%

Number of months Littlefield has remaining in his term if he runs and loses in the August 2012 recall election: 7

Sources: Hamilton County Election Commission, ballotpedia.com

The Pulse Index is intended as an homage to Harper’s Index, a registered trademark of Harper’s Magazine.

Pulse Index

Recall Ron, by The Numbers

tHeBoWL

Chattanooga’s not going to replace Silicon Valley anytime soon, but the city built the nation’s first gigabit-per-second fiber optic network—even if that service does cost more than $300 a month.

Now, the Lamp Post Group, a “venture incubator” backing a pro-

gram dubbed “Gig Tank”, is offering $300,000 in start-up cash and prizes to entrepreneurs and students to de-sign high-speed apps and business us-ing the network.

The Tank will fund 10 teams with $15,000. The team with the best idea at the end of the program earns the top

prize of $100,000. Ten-to-15 students will also compete for a $50,000 prize, but will receive no start-up funding. The Gig Tank is also offering a $1,000 finder’s fee to anyone who nominates a candidate who is chosen for the pro-gram. For more information, visit the-gigcity.com. —Bill Ramsey

We Built Gig City, Now Gig Tank Offers $300K To Make It Hum


The Price (?) of Fame• Discrediting false market-ing, chuck crowder wrote that fame and acclaim should be awarded to the deserv-ing—that which has passed a litmus test. his editorial im-plied that the famous, should 1) meet criteria proving it to be outstanding, and 2) be acknowledged as such by the public, or even better, by a group of experts. But I tend to think that most of who and what is famous has not met either of these criteria. Fame is not fair, because it is by nature imputed, and often done so by a powerful minority who influence the majority. Fame is also controlled by time and place far more than we want to admit. While I sympathize with chuck’s frustration with ad-jectives used by marketers, I wonder if his standards are too ideal. Because of globalization, today’s “famous” are compet-ing with the whole world—You-tube has forever leveled the playing field when it comes to skill. so my question is, are you really only qualified to be called “world-famous” if you are the best on some kind of international platform? Laura Heathchattanooga

Homo for the Holidays• our 31-year-old gay son died from hIV/aIDs nineteen years ago. I loved him, cared for him until the end, accepted him, his partner and friends. I be-came a “member” of the lgbt community by way of chatta-noogacares and pFlag chat-tanooga. they are my family. my bio family (siblings, et al) is large with many elephants standing around. although we’ve been very open with everyone, other siblings have been non-accepting of our response and way of dealing openly with our own situa-tion. For example, one sibling has two gay children that are disowned, not allowed to come home w/partner, and a third child who has partner of another race - also not al-

lowed to bring partner home. Result: total estrangement. their way of dealing with the whole situation is “not to deal with it”(total silence). We have become surrogate parents. however, we had our thanksgiving table today with family and do every year; we are so blessed. thank you.matt Nevelschattanooga

Police, not guns• chattanooga organized for action takes crime, especially violent gun crime, very seri-ously because many coa members are living with the daily realities of violence and death in the places we live and

work. citizens demanding jus-tifications and holding elected leaders accountable does not mean that we hate free speech or cops. the decision to pur-chase a slew of aR-15s is, like all other budgetary matters, a question of priorities. ap-parently our city council and city hall believe that our police should be underpaid, overworked and armed to the

teeth. Rather than forking out money for a unceasing arms race, we should hire more police, pay them more and place a greater emphasis on funding programs that provide essential social services to our most marginalized and impoverished communities.our city is more dangerous than atlanta or Detroit, two of the most dangerous cities in the country. the answer to vio-lent gun crime is not aR-15s, tactical Bear cat trucks or a Zodiac boat, the answer is tak-ing responsible action to deal with the underlying economic and social conditions that give rise to desperate acts.Chris brooksExecutive Director, Chattanooga Organized for Actionchattanooga

editoon RICK bALdWIN

Got an opinion? Of course you do! Email your letter (300 words or less, please, with name and daytime phone number) to : [email protected].

Letters

CHATTANOOGA’S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE » NEWS • MUSIC • ARTS • ENTERTAINMENT » NOVEmbER 24-30, 2011 • chattanoogapulse.com

Chattanooga’s

chattanoogapulse.com • NOVEMBER 24-30, 2011 • the pulse • 15

H I S + H E R S H O L I D A Y G I F T G U I D E 2 0 1 1

The Pulse His+Her Gift Guide appears again on Dec. 15. Call 423.242.7680 — there’s still time to get in the guide!

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news » the bowl

ReCALL ROn, PT. IIas the carousel turns: littlefield couldemerge poorer, but remain mayor

toURING teNNessee’s

whIskey tRAIl jim pfitzer

drops into distilleriesfor a taste

“Our city is more dangerous than Atlanta or Detroit, two of the most dangerous cities in the country. The answer to violent gun crime is not AR-15s, tactical Bear Cat trucks or a Zodiac boat.


POLITICS, mEdIA & OTHER & otheR stRange BeDFelloWs

While chattanooga’s working poor struggle through another holiday season, the champagne will be flowing on mon-day, Dec. 5, at the home of alexis and Barry Bogo, where Wonderkid Weston Wamp will hold his first campaign fundraiser. on that evening, Young Weston hopes to cash in big—a potential haul of more than $245,000, ac-cording to calculations made in a recent nooga.com report—in his bid to replace incumbent chuck Fleischmann.

Wamp will need the money. chuck scored a fundraising bonanza when house speaker John Boehner dropped into town for a fund-raiser, raising more than $200,000 for the congressman’s cam-paign war chest, which stands at $410,539 as of nov. 19, accord-ing to the center for Responsive politics.

supporters at Wamp’s wingding will be asked to fork over $500 to $1,000 for the opportunity to meet to the young contender in a “business casual atmosphere”, although presumably the invited already support the son of Wamp. While we’re certain occupy chat-tanooga will be nowhere near the Bogo home (as they were outside the Walden club for Fleischmann’s fund-raiser), we’re anxious to hear lady J’s (aka Dr. Jean howard-hill) reac-tion to the well-heeled event after accusing

chuck of “whoring” the 3rd District seat to the highest bidder.

sadly, it takes Big money these days to be elected to almost any of-fice, and it seems he or she with the most cash almost always wins. Fleischmann, an attor-ney, spent a record $1.3 million during the 2010 primary and general election in his winning bid to replace Wamp’s dad, Zach, in congress. But that’s chump change compared to the presidential race, which could exceed $6 billion by some esti-mates. money changes everything—and with little life experience and no real platform, Wamp will need a fat campaign wallet to battle his well-funded opponent.

the excessive cost of campaigns is due, in part, to the two-year election cycle. no soon-er is a congressman elected than he or she faces the almost instan-taneous challenge of gearing up for the battle again. While redistrict-ing and gerrymandering has secured an over-whelming advantage for candidates of a par-ticular party in recent

years, resulting in fewer contested elections and a 90 percent re-election rate for incumbents, congress’ record low approval rating results in fresh congressmen like chuck having to face a gaggle of op-ponents from his own party in a primary race.

Incumbents benefit from name recogni-tion and party loyalty, drawing on a base of support and fundraisers featuring top-name law-makers like Boehner. In campaigns such as the 3rd District, the odds against beating an in-cumbent, based on 2010 figures with spending of less than $1 million, is 248 to 9. even with no real opposition from Democrats it seems, it’s still a tough wager.

the stakes only get higher as you move up the political totem pole. consider u.s. sen. Bob corker of chattanooga, who will himself face a re-election campaign next year. according to the center for Respon-sive politics, corker has raised more than $10 million as of nov. 19. his closest competi-tor, Zachary poskevich, also a Republican, has raised just $21,000. corker is popular and will likely easily win re-election, but the dis-crepancy between those figures alarms us—as it should everyone.

Dizzy town

Brother, Can You Spare A Grand?

Read DizzyTown dai-ly at chattanoogapulse.com. Send us your Diz-zyness! Email: [email protected].


Do you ever get a kick out of overhear-ing a random conver-sation from the table behind you at a res-taurant? Same thing, but going 24/7 in our heads, even while walking down a side-walk, as I was tonight.

“…Actually, I just bummed this from someone inside,” the man was explaining.

“Well, how about a dollar then?” my future client was asking. “That way I can go buy some.” The other man sighed.

I stopped and joined the con-versation. “I’m sorry, do you know each other?”

“Yeah, we’re friends!” Scrap-py volunteered (before the oth-er man could interject).

I raised my eyebrow and feigned surprise. “Small world! I’m friends with Dusty also!” And it was true. Dusty was a fireman, but to his credit he was much less pervy than the

rest. And that’s saying a lot.

It was that time of year again, prime time for vagrants. T e m p e r a t u r e s dropped to a point that it was no longer practical to sleep on an open rooftop or on

the courthouse lawn, the latter being more difficult than ever since the “Occupy” nuts had taken their space.

The temperatures meant they had to use the shelter (of which there was really only one in town), but it was also the holiday shopping season and guilty-feeling people were ev-erywhere with crisp ten and 20 dollar bills, just waiting to be harassed at the next sidewalk or mall entrance. Awareness of this cash and that there were people eager to spend it makes them aggressive, and compe-tition for space in the shelter (and now the courthouse lawn)

made them pushy.Even rail riders (a differ-

ent sub-set of bums) who were normally invisible by choice were out in force. In the last few days, I’d observed a few with the audacity to approach an elderly woman on a walker at her car on the front row of a hardware store, trunk open and gifts barely placed inside, about as vulnerable as she could be. They stood to either side of her, hands out and stepping closer. She was scared, and I was off duty, which turned out to be a bad combination for them. I reassured her with a smile, walked between her and them and eventually began flogging them like a rooster. (I know. Sounds weird to me, too—but it works.)

Dusty smiled gratefully and walked away, leaving me with my bum. In truth? I couldn’t stand this guy. We’d had this talk before but he was too drunk to remember. He went by “Scrappy” and loved living on the street. No medical is-sues, decent IQ at one point, he just hated work and liked be-ing “free”. And unfortunately, his idea of “freedom” was to ask each and every human being he saw for money and cigarettes and feign delusions about Arch-angels to solidify his weirdness to seal the deal. In short, he was

what insensitive people like me called a “bum” because that’s what “bums” do.

Some need mental help; most, in fact. Others, the minority, just had life pulled out from un-der their feet. But the ones that do it by choice? Not “vagrants”. Not “habitation challenged”. Just “bums”. Stupid people feel good about encouraging this lifestyle by handing them cash (or a smoke) and they can tuck their guilt away into a drawer again—but only if the subject walked away and stopped being there. If they stayed, the stupid people would then have to deal with them, and that wasn’t part of the $5 plan. And this guy? He was as persistent as Chi-nese water torture, and my last polite warning had been dis-carded like the others before it. Time to change it up.

“I’ve asked it nicely and I’ve asked it firmly, Scrappy. So now I’m beginning to think you just don’t care. About me. About the system.” I broke a major rule and reached around him with my left arm and grabbed his shoulder, pulling him uncom-fortably close to my non-gun side and forcing him to walk down the sidewalk with me.

“We’re all just hanging by a thread here, my good man. Two thousand years of civilization, just hanging by a thread. It’s true. And you know how that works?” I looked towards him now. “Because of people like me, Scrappy. People like me maintaining a system of rules in order to live in a civilized so-ciety,” I explained as we walked, looking off to the stars wist-fully. “We’re barely keeping it together as a society, and you’re straining that thread.” I pulled him yet closer.

“You like roosters?” I asked.

March of the BumsPOLICE OFFICERS ARE OBSERVERS BY NATuRE. IT drives friends and family nuts sometimes, but what do you do? We’re trained to hunt, made worse by the fact that we don’t even know what we’re hunting half the time. So we watch, constantly taking in samples of our environment, running it through the “DonuTron 1000” that is our brain (yes, I just made that up), processing it for anything out of the ordinary, and spitting it back out.

on the Beat ALEx TEACH

When Chattanooga Police Of-ficer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he is an occasional student, carpenter, boating enthusiast, and spends his spare time vol-unteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center. Follow him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/alex.teach.

“Dusty was a fireman, but to his credit he was much less pervy than the rest. And that’s saying a lot.

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I spoke with Montana State Repre-sentative Mike Phillips, project leader on the Yellowstone Restoration Project in 1995, and who led the biologists in the Alligator River red wolf restoration project in North Carolina, and also in the ill-fated Smoky Mountain restora-tion effort in the early ’90s.

Phillips explained to me that one of the greatest problems the wolves face in keeping their gene pool strong is hybridization with coyotes. “Without the presence of intensive management to keep wolves and coyotes apart and minimize hybridization, I don’t know if any area in the Southeast can support reintroduction in the wild,” he said.

The Alligator River project is still running with several wolves still living and thriving in the refuge. The Smoky Mountain effort, however, fell apart because of lack of prey in the area. After a high mortality rate with lit-ters born within the packs, and many questionable, potentially hybrid pups, the project was cancelled in 1998. The remaining surviving wolves were re-moved and placed in captivity.

Red wolves are not the fluffy gray ca-nids that grace the cover of calendars in Walmart. They are a smaller, cin-namon-colored ancestor that shares many characteristics in behavior, so-cial structure within packs, and of course, diet. The gray wolf, on its turf

of the Greater Yellowstone ecosystem, will take down much bigger prey than the red wolves are capable of overpowering. Moose, elk, bison and mule deer sustain wolf diets in the Northern Rockies while whitetail deer and raccoons make up the diet of this smaller cousin.

These misunderstood predators have been killed, trapped, burned alive and otherwise tortured to the point of extinction. The way a healthy wolf popula-tion takes part in the sym-

biosis of an ecosystem is invaluable. The wolves take down the old and sick members of deer and elk herds, mak-ing the bloodlines stronger by leaving only the strongest members left to breed. They also eat smaller animals such as beavers, stopping destructive dam building and loss of vegetation around riparian areas.

Jeremy Hooper, a uTC graduate and Nature Center employee since 2010, is excited about his role at the center and ready to educate the public about wolves. “Let us be the beginning,” he said. “Come down to the center and we’ll show you the role we play in con-serving red wolves and what incredible animals they are.”

Seeing a red wolf in the wild is a true gift, but you would have to go to North-eastern North Carolina to the Alligator River National Wildlife Refuge—and get really lucky. Otherwise, take the much shorter drive to the Chattanooga Nature Center. On April 30, 2011, two females were born at the nature center. The pups, now half grown, are healthy and happy. Autumn is the perfect time to view the wolves. You can also view the bobcat, a woodchuck, and several other mammals and reptiles. Take a good long look around, and see what can be learned from the wild. Visit their website at chattanooganature-center.org.

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Last Call of the Wild

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HOWLS. PANTING. NERVOuSNESS. All these actions are typical of the Chattanooga Nature Center’s red wolves. In three large enclo-sures the wolf pack holds fast to its last stand in captivity. For the most part, they’ve run out of places to live in the wild, and there are only a few hundred red wolves left.

The day I visited they were especially excited. Running around their enclosures, tongues dan-gling happily, they embodied wild ecstasy. The wolves were treated to venison, courtesy of a hunt-er, for their meal. They ate like wolves should eat.

Tish Gailmard, wildlife curator at the center, told me, “We work closely with the u.S. Fish and Wildlife Service and they advise us with our ex-hibit and breeding. We have three enclosures with six adults and they’ve bred twice now.” Gailmard proudly showed the plaque won by the center. In 2007, the Chattanooga Nature Center received the North American Conservation Award for red wolf recovery by the Association of Zoos and Aquariums.

Red wolves are far more endangered than their gray cousins in the Yellowstone area. Like the Mexican wolf, whose total numbers are only in the double digits, their hope for survival lies mostly in captivity. Wild restoration efforts have been dif-ficult.

Endangered red wolves find home at nature center


“There’s nothing surerThe rich get rich and the poor get childrenIn the meantime, in between timeAin’t we got fun?”

Ain’t We Got Fun, 1921

The first news from the 2010 Census about poverty wasn’t good. On Sept. 14, the Associ-ated Press reported that 46.2 million Americans were living

in poverty—nearly one in six people—and that the poverty rate had climbed in one year from 14.3 percent to 15.1 per-cent. Tennessee, according to the same report, fared even worse, with a 16.7 per-cent poverty rate. In human terms—out of every 100 Tennesseans, almost 17 are living below the poverty line.

The news got worse. AP reported on Nov. 3 that the nation’s “poorest poor” now account for one in 15 people, or 20.5 million Americans. This means “an in-come of $5,570 for an individual and $11,157 for a family.”

Then, on Nov. 20, a study commis-sioned by the New York Times chimed in with a newly coined term: the “near poor”. The Census Bureau was using a new method of measuring poverty, called the Supplemental Poverty Mea-sure, and this one showed that 51 million people have incomes less than 50 percent above the poverty line. This new tabula-tion was 76 percent higher than the fig-ures released in September. “That places one in three Americans either in poverty

or the fretful zone just above it,” said the NYT.

But not here in Chattanooga and Hamilton County, right? Things are booming here, aren’t they? Those statis-tics don’t apply to us…do they?

Even before all the statistics men-tioned were published, researchers at the Brookings Institute had released a

report on Oct. 7, 2010 called “The Great Recession and Poverty in Metropolitan America” using data from the Census Bureau’s 2009 American Community Survey. These numbers confirmed, “the worst u.S. economic downturn in de-cades exacerbated trends set in motion years before, by multiplying the ranks of America’s poor.

“An analysis of poverty in the nation’s 100 largest metro areas, based on recent-ly released data from the 2009 American Community Survey, indicates that:

“Several metro areas saw city poverty rates increase by more than 5 percent-age points, while many suburban areas experienced increases of 2 to 4 percent-age points between 2007 and 2009. The city of Allentown, PA saw a 10.2 percent-age-point increase in its poverty rate, followed by Chattanooga, TN with an increase of 8.0 percentage points.” (Ital-ics ours.)

This, taking into account that the old numbers, based on the 2000 census, were already bad enough: According to a presentation prepared by the City of Chattanooga Social Services Depart-ment in 2005:

“According to the 2000 Census, there were 26,843 individuals living in poverty in Chattanooga—17.9% of the total pop-ulation—compared to 12.4% nationally.

“The poverty rate for children under 18 was 27% in Chattanooga—compared to 16.6% nationally.

“2002 data is only available at the county level. In Hamilton County, 12.9% of all individuals and 18.6% of all chil-dren were living in poverty.”

“We are seeing a big increase in people who have never needed help before,” says Al Tucker, a social services delivery man-ager for the Social Services Department. He estimated, depending on the month, that numbers are up between 25 and 35 percent this year.

But numbers don’t have faces. Num-bers are easy to ignore. The Pulse asked contributor Cody Maxwell to help tell the story of poverty in Chattanooga.

Slipping Through The cracks{ Chattanooga’s boom is bypassing many of the city’s working poor }

{ By JanIS HaSHE and codY maXwELL • Photos by LESHa PaTTErSon }» page 10


I was standing in line early one Saturday at St. Elmo’s Amman Mar-

ket with a dirty, barefoot 3 year old. Her baby belly was sticking out from un-der her favorite pink prin-cess shirt, which stopped fitting her properly a year ago.

We’d been waiting all morning for mama to get in the shower. When we fi-nally heard the water run-ning. we snuck the keys out of her purse and ran out to the car. The plan was com-ing together. We’d whis-pered it the night before, in the dark just before going to sleep—tomorrow we’d sneak and go get chocolate.

The only thing standing between us and success were two griz-zly old drunks in line in front of us at the store. My partner in crime took the time we spent waiting to reason with me. We should get two chocolates, she said, in case we couldn’t come to the store again later. We should get two of them so she could give one to her sister. And we had to hurry, she said, before mama finds us.

I told her I only had two dollars. I took one out of my billfold and gave it to her.

The first old drunk fi-nally decided on his ciga-rettes and the line moved up one. I looked down at my partner and her belly still stuck out from under her dirty pink shirt. Her feet were dirty, too, and her hair needed combing. She held her chocolate in both hands, looking up at me smiling and trembling with excitement. “It’s gonna be good,” she said.

I turned back around and the old bearded drunk in front of me was holding a dollar bill inches from my face. “Here,” he said. “So

she can get her sister one, too.”

I felt insulted and want-ed to tell him that I had more money in my pocket, but I took the dollar so he’d stop dangling it in front of me. I gave it to my girl, told her to tell him thank you and go get another choco-late. She told him thanks and I watched her run barefoot and happy back down the candy aisle.

The old drunk was smil-ing when I turned back toward him. “I like little kids,” he said. His buddy was standing at the door laughing at him, telling him to hurry up. That old drunk waved bye and he went out the door with his friend. We got our choco-late and went back home.

The funny thing is it was that very day I was sup-posed to start writing this story. The very story you’re reading now. It was sup-posed to be about the face of poverty in Chattanooga. It was going to be a very solemn and sad story, a story that profiled people struggling to buy food and clothes for their children. People who didn’t see the end of November as the be-ginning of the holidays but as the beginning of a hard, cold season that could hurt them. And there I was feel-ing like a comical carica-ture in my own story. My trouble didn’t end there.

A few days before I’d gone down to see the Oc-cupiers on the courthouse lawn to do a little research,

to ask them personally what all the fuss was about, why they were doing what they were doing and to put a timely, politically serious spin on this story. It didn’t work out that way.

It was just after dark when I got to the court-house. A group of four or five Occupiers sat near the sidewalk holding up poster-board signs with slogans. Sometimes cars honked at them as they drove by and when they did, those four or five people cheered.

Flowers were planted in very neat rows in the court-house yard behind them. From the courthouse steps, where so many foreclosed homes had been auctioned off, Georgia Avenue’s churchless steeple could

be seen, lit up by electric lights and pointing up to the heav-ens. A great big American flag hung loosely on a pole.

I approached a young man who was stand-ing alone under one of the old trees. He wore smart glasses and was eating soup from a Sty-

rofoam bowl. “It’s a beau-tiful night for a protest,” I said. He looked up at me over the corner of his bowl, unamused. I told him I was working on a story about poverty in Chattanooga and asked if he’d talk to me about the nature of the Oc-cupy movement and what the Chattanooga group was hoping to achieve.

“All this is based on the larger movement, like what’s happening on Wall Street,” he said. “We’re try-ing to keep with the soli-darity of that larger move-ment. We have meetings everyday at 7 p.m.”

When asked what the larger movement was mov-ing toward, he explained that it was all about money. About getting rid of the

I was wondering whatthe Occupy Chattanooga group

was doing on its own, in the immediate area and for the benefit of impoverished people in this city.


big corporations and big banks that are destroying this country. “This coun-try can’t continue this way. We’re not going to let it. The people don’t want it. We have live streaming on our computers from the other Occupy encamp-ments. We’ve had people from Indianapolis and Nashville stop by. This can really be something if everybody would come to-gether.”

I was wondering what the Chattanooga group was doing on its own, in the immediate area and for the benefit of impoverished people in this city.

“There’s a few of us who have a garden being grown down by the smok-ing area,” he explained. “They have veg-etables grow-ing in buckets right here on the courthouse lawn. We have organic farm-ing classes and classes on sus-tainable living we give. People need to learn how to live on their own and not buy all the genetically engi-neered food. All the hormone-pumped stuff from Wal-Mart.”

Do you guys cook all this food out here? I asked him.

“No. People deliver it to us. People cook in their houses and bring us more than we can eat. Church-es drop stuff off. We had somebody bring this soup and some bread down ear-lier today. You should go get yourself some.”

I declined and asked him directly what the group was doing for those living in real poverty in this city. There are people out there who are hurting, who may not have anything to eat tonight. The boy smiled shyly. “I don’t really have too much to say about that. I don’t know that much about it.

“We’re trying to keep with the solidarity of the larger movement,” he said, and bowed his head to swallow a few spoonfuls of his soup. When he looked back up and saw I was still standing there, he said, “Maybe you should talk to some of these other people here. They might be a lit-tle more articulate about what’s going on.”

Walking back down the street, I passed a bail bondsman sitting on a concrete ledge at the back door of the county jail. He was talking to a huddled, pajama-clad woman. She was sitting with her legs crossed on the ledge beside him, smoking cigarette af-ter cigarette and holding onto herself. I overheard

part of their conversation. They were waiting for her man to come out of the back door of the jail there. A little girl in a nightgown and dirty socks was at the woman’s feet, playing in the dead leaves on the side-walk.

I’d had a handful of peo-ple in mind to profile for the story. It’s not hard to find people living below the statistical poverty line. All these people had enthusi-astically volunteered their help when I asked. This will be great, they said. Fi-nally they could say some-thing about what it’s really like.

But by the time the dead-line came there had been a mass change of heart. “I really don’t have it all that

bad,” some said. One mid-dle-aged guy was worried that it might hurt future ro-mantic endeavors and one woman sent me an abrupt email. She didn’t want the pictures the photographer had taken of her to be used and she didn’t want to be in the story. “Thank You.”

Things were not look-ing good, but I understood where people were coming from. Nobody wants to be poor. But more impor-tantly, nobody wants to be seen as poor. It’s something to hide, to cover up and be secretly ashamed of. Their reasons for backing out of the story made me see why I’d felt so insulted over the old drunk’s dollar. I didn’t want to be seen that way, either.

I had one prospect left. Java, a woman I met about a year ago.

When I met Java she was sleeping on a b a n d o n e d loading docks on 11th Street. She’d left a bad r e l a t i o n s h i p to sleep on the street. Her days were spent in the Community

Kitchen and her nights in St. Catherine’s Women’s Shelter. About a year ago, after being on a waiting list for months, she moved into a small apartment on the 14th floor of Dogwood Manor.

I stopped by to see her last Sunday. Her new apartment was clean and warm and her living room window overlooked the river and North Chatta-nooga. She told me about the hoops she had to jump through to get the place. Her rent works on a sliding scale and she was coming up for an evaluation soon. “It don’t help to worry about it, though,” she said.

She makes jewelry to sell when she can. She gets

“Nobody wants to be poor. But more importantly,

nobody wants to be seenas poor.”

» page 12


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a clothing allowance from the Community Kitchen and some-times uses the money to buy beaded women’s shirts at thrift stores. She takes the beads off the shirts and uses them to make her jewelry.

The purpose of my visit was to interview her. I started the for-malities of it but things soon di-gressed into simple conversation. I told her about sneaking out the other morning to get choco-late. “You can’t be feeding a baby chocolate that early in the morn-ing,” she said. She told me a story from her hippie commune days.

“I used to take all the children to the Berkeley House Restau-rant back then. I’d get a group of some of the children from the commune and maybe one or two more adults and everybody had to be clean. We’d have a nice meal. Great service. And the kids would learn their table manners. Everybody would behave and en-joy their dinner.

“I liked teaching the kids table manners. You never know. It may be nice to know sometimes which fork to use. Me, I don’t get worried about it. I like whatever

fits my hand. Anyway. English riding lessons didn’t do me much good, either.”

When I told her about the inci-dent with the drunk man and his dollar bill she laughed at me.

“Well, what’s there to be mad at? He wasn’t giving you a dollar anyway,” she said. “He was giving it to that little girl for candy. She didn’t get mad about it. If some-body offers you a dollar you take it.”

Java laughed again.“This little guy Shorty at the

Community Kitchen one time stuck his finger in my back like he was trying to rob me and says, ‘Give me all your money.’ And I was thinking like, ‘Heck, I got a bunch of pennies I don’t even like carrying around.’ And I said, ‘OK! Here! I’ll gladly give you all my money.’ I go to give it to him and he don’t want to take it. Now that’s pretty pitiful when you’re getting robbed and then they change their mind.

“Anyway. It was funny. He fi-nally took them, though. I kind of shamed him into taking them. Lousy little robber, didn’t even want to take the money.”

After life on the street, “Java” is settled in her new apartment.


at the Department of Social Services, Al Tucker notes that $1 million in stimulus

funds helped many people last year, but that money was gone. Director Camilla Bibbs-Lee says that of the 14,000 families aided last year, many do not fit stereo-types. They are newly unem-ployed, helping elderly parents, people who are afraid they will lose their homes or apartments. Many just need assistance to pay their lighting or heating bills. They are, in fact, the working poor next door.

“This is not one agency’s prob-lem,” she says. “Innovative ideas are needed to break the cycle. For-profit, nonprofit and gov-ernment sectors need to work together…we need to change to a model geared to successful out-comes.”

In the meantime, in between time…is it your problem? Is it our problem? Time to find the an-swer.

• According to the 2000 Census, there were 26,843 individuals living in poverty in Chattanooga—17.9% of the total population—compared to 12.4% nationally.

• The poverty rate for children un-der 18 was 27% in Chattanooga—compared to 16.6% nationally.

• 2002 data is only available at the county level. In Hamilton County, 12.9% of all individuals and 18.6% of all children were living in poverty.

— city of chattanooga social servic-es Department (2005)

• Data from the census Bureau’s 2009 american community survey confirm that the worst u.s. economic downturn in decades exacerbated trends set in motion years before, by

multiplying the ranks of america’s poor. Between 2007 and 2009, the national poverty rate rose from 13 percent to 14.3 percent, and the number of people below the poverty line jumped by 4.9 million.

the number of poor people in large metro areas grew by 5.5 million from 1999 to 2009, and more than two-thirds of that growth occurred in suburbs. by 2009, 1.6 million more poor lived in the suburbs of the nation’s largest metro areas compared to the cities.

several metro areas saw city poverty

rates increase by more than 5 percent-age points, while many suburban areas experienced increases of 2 to 4 percent-age points between 2007 and 2009. the city of allentown, pa saw a 10.2 percentage-point increase in its poverty rate, followed by chattanooga, tn with an increase of 8.0 percentage points.

—Brookings Institute: “the great Recession and poverty in metropolitan america”

“1 in 3 Americans in or barely above poverty level.” 51 million people with incomes less than 50 per-cent above the poverty line. that num-ber of americans is 76 percent higher than the official account, published in september.

source: census Bureau report, pro-duced at the request of the new York times.

— new York times, november 20

Local, national stats chart rise of poverty in U.S.“the city of allentown, pa saw a 10.2 percentage-point increase in its poverty rate, followed by Chattanooga, TN with an increase of 8.0 percentage points.”


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THUR12.01

From Ducks to Roller Girls, They’ll Be Stepping Out

»pulse PICK oF the LITTER

12.03 • EPb SOUTHSIdE PARAdE TAKES TO THE STREETS• One of the highlights of the holiday season returns, this year with Art Bikes, Howard High Marching Band, vintage cars and of course, Santa. Free. 11 a.m. Rossville ave./Jefferson st./main st. mainx24.com

tHeLIsttHeLIstDeC. 1-7

CALenDARmUSIC

Jucifer• Two-by-two metal sludge.$5. 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 e. mlK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. myspace.com/jjsbohemia

mUSIC

Chattanooga Harp Ensemble• Fifteen harps…are we in heaven? Free. 7 p.m. Brainerd united methodist church, 4315 Brainerd Rd. (423) 698-6951. brainerdumc.org

»pulse PICKS

mUSIC

Krampus day with Subterranean Cirqus, Unspoken Triumph, Oxxen • Get krunkin’ with the Krampus!$5. 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 e. mlK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. myspace.com/jjsbohemia.com

EVENT

martha, marcy, may, marlene• AEC Independent Films resume with tale of cult refugee rejoining her family. multiple screening times. majestic 12, 311 Broad st. (423) 265-5220. carmike.com

mUSIC

The Wailers• Marley’s disciples carry on, mon. $18 advance/ $20 day of. 9 p.m. track 29, 1400 market st. (423) 521-2929. track29.co

EVENT

mainx24 Fashion Show• From the inventive minds at Collective Clothing and Zombi Candi. Free. 4 p.m. chattanooga choo choo, 1400 market st. mainx24.com

FRI12.02

SAT12.03

mUSIC

The Fells• When the Celts come marching in. Free. 7 p.m. the honest pint, 35 patten pkwy. (423) 468-4192. thehonestpint.com

EVENT

Have A Seat• ETC takes on homelessness in an original, experimental piece.$10. 6:30 p.m. st. andrews center, 1918 union st. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreofchattanooga.com

SUN12.04

CALenDAR

DeC. 1-7mAINx24

Main-ly Highlights8 a.m.dAdAFLASHmOb55 E. Main Street• Will dancing be involved? how about fur teacups? come out and see…

Noon - 4: p.m.dEmOSS CAPITAL PRESENTS WORLd HEAVYWEIGHT CHILI CHAmPIONSHIP AT OCI326 E. Main Street• listen to the incredible mu-sic from the “loading Dock of Rock” while enjoying all you can eat chili from 20-plus teams.

11 a.m.-NoonEPb SOUTHSIdE PARAdERossville Avenue & Jefferson Street• the epB southside parade be-gins at the corner of Rossville ave, and Jefferson street, and extends down Jefferson to main street.

4 -5 p.m.mAINx24 FASHION SHOW1400 Market Street• at the chattanooga choo-choo. produced by collective clothing and Zombi candi.

8 -9:30 p.m.SCULPTURE bURN304 E. Main Street• Warm up for the main event with the return of this year’s fire sculpture, “sanc-tuary” by andrew nigh.

Read about all the events and download a schedule on the mainX24 website: mainx24.com.

Jucifer rocks JJ’s bohemia, Thursday 12.01


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and as has been discussed, you will be there with dreads on or not. That is all I will say about that.

Now for you daytime lurk-ers, you have to get down to The CampHouse at anytime between 1 p.m. to 10:30 p.m. There are 12 different per-formers: Noah Collins, The Family Gardener, Strung Like a Horse and Rick Rush-ing being local favorites and many others I am excited to hear for the first time. There will also be a Latte Art Com-petition. Ooh la la.

Another other heavy hit-ter will be one of my personal favorites—the World Heavy-Weight Chili Competition at OCI. Four local bands will grace the stage, including our homies, Glowing Bordis. There will be a huge Lego Build for kids and adults and you get a taste of what our local friends have cooked up as they try to win the heavy-weight belt for best (or maybe even worst) chili of the year!

This year, we welcome The Crash Pad to its first MainX24.

The Crash Pad and its employees rock, and if you haven’t been by yet, then here is your excuse to see what this wonderful hostel has to of-

fer for your next stay-cation. You can also challenge a few friends to corn hole, ping-pong and ladder ball while having a drink and listen-ing to the sounds of Reagan Smash. You can find this hot spot behind Niedlov’s.

Also new this year is The Electric Bull and Music at 509 E. Main Street. um, yeah, an electric bull…this should make a great area to camp out for those in the pho-to contest and I can reassure that while I may stop by to hear the Atlanta-based group

Men of Soul and groove out, you will only see my laughter and not my tears of embar-rassment on this day.

Do not forget the Bread Factory Lofts Tacky Christ-mas Sweater Party from 6 to 9 p.m., 1615 Cowart St. You know you have one—pull it on and listen to DJK7 spin.

There is just too much. Go

to the website, print a sched-ule, figure it out. Occupy Main Street and support our local businesses. Take your kids to the Root Beer Kegger at Terminal, see what Monica has been up to at Mean Mug Coffee Shop, watch local SMTA students play Summit pianos at CreateHere, vote at the Busking Competition or go and Busk Yourself!

And for Santa’s sake DO NOT MISS THE SCuLP-TuRE BuRN!!

Did I get a Velo’s coffee yet? See you Saturday!

Music

Time For The Main Thangby Tara V

NO TIME FOR BANTER THIS WEEK, my friends. Lots to do, not enough time. Gotsta decide which bathroom I will use to switch from day to evening gear and how much money I can spend between chili, beer and holiday gifts. Gotsta find out if there is an app for my friend’s phone that will tell me where all my peo-ple are so I don’t have to use the old ways of texting or yelling from a street corner. Gotsta see all my bands, I will need cof-fee, gotsta get my coffee.

MY OH MY, where is Sandy? I need a hug.

OK, calm down. We do this every year and figure it out every time, usually with a Sunday headache of joy. Sorry—what in the world am I talking about?

This Saturday we celebrate the South-side with MAINX24.

In its fifth year, we prove wiser and are able to introduce new friends and neighbors to this gloriously unique side of town.

My only nonmusical advice will be to just stay home Friday night…if you just can’t say no to that lil’ red guy on your shoulders, then at least take it easy—you will have 24 straight hours on Main Street to let it all out and more than 90 events to muster through the next day.

Here we go:The Main Event will be held at Track

29 from 9 p.m. till 1 a.m., hosting the world-famous reggae group The Wail-ers. You know, those guys who played with Bob Marley. It is an all-ages show

mainx24saturday, December 3main streetmainx24.com

break out your tacky christmas sweater!

What 35 Patten Parkway was meant to be.

Full food menu serving lunch and dinner. 11am-2am, 7 days a week.

honest music local and regional showsThu, Dec 1

Sun, Dec 4

Wed, Dec 7

Thu, Dec 8

9pm

7pm

9pm

9pm

Kristin Cothran and the Darkside with Nigel Gibson ($3)

The Fells - Free Show!

Star and Micey with Raenbow Station ($3)

Manic Bloom with Faretheewell ($3)

Saturday, Dec 17 Unknown Hinson with The Maycomb Criers! Tickets on sale now: thehonestpint.com/venue


Chattanooga LiveThur 12.01

rick rushing and the blues Strangers 7:30 p.m. sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad st. (423) 508-8956. sugarsribs.comJucifer8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 e. mlK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. myspace.com/jjsbohemiabrock blues band8 p.m. the lounge at the palms at hamilton, 6925 shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055. thepalmsath-amilton.comPlan b band8 p.m. acoustic café, 61 RBc Dr., Ringgold. (706) 965-2065. ringgoldacoustic.comLucero, Futurebirds9 p.m. track 29, 1400 market st, choo choo campus. (423) 266-5000track29.coKristin cothran and the darkside 9 p.m. the honest pint, 35 patten pkwy. (423) 468-4192. thehonestpint.comchanning Wilson, drake White, brent cobb10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 market st. (423) 267-4644. rhythm-brews.com

Fri 12.02The New empires cD Release7 p.m. pasha coffee and tea,3914 st. elmo ave. (423) 475-5482. pashacoffeehouse.comLorrie morgan8 p.m. memorial auditorium, 399 mccallie ave. (423) 642-tIXs. chattanoogaon-stage.commark Andrews

8 p.m. the Delta Queen, 100 River st. (423) 468-4500.deltaqueenhotel.netNothing & The Nobody’s8 p.m. acoustic café, 61 RBc Dr., Ringgold. (706) 965-2065. ringgoldacoustic.comFifth Year Anniversary Party: mike mcdade, butch ross, mark “Porkchop” Holder, TJ Greever9 p.m. tremont tavern, 1203 hixson pk. (423) 266-1996. tremonttavern.comThe Pool9 p.m. sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad st. (423) 508-8956. sugarsribs.comKrumpus day:

Subterranean cirqus, Unspoken Triumph, Oxxen9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 e. mlK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. myspace.com/jjsbohemiaxxx9 p.m. Raw, 409 market st. (423) 756-1919. myspace.com/jimstrikermark “Porkchop” Holder9 p.m. the office (inside Days Inn), 901 carter st. (423) 634-9191. Find them on Facebook.roger Alan Wade10 p.m. t-Bones cafe, 1419 chestnut st. (423) 266-4240. tboneschatta-nooga.com

Steam boars10 p.m. market street tavern, 850 market st. (423) 634-0260. Find them on Facebook.Fly by radio10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 market st. (423) 267-4644. rhythm-brews.comclayton Lee9 p.m. Raw, 409 market st. (423) 756-1919. myspace.com/jimstriker

Sat 12.03caleb Lange6:30 p.m. pasha coffee and tea,3914 st. elmo ave. (423) 475-5482. pashacoffeehouse.comGateway 2 Nowhere, day 7, Gears Of Insanity, reverse Signature, Protestega7 p.m. the Warehouse, 412 market st. (423) 757-1569. warehousevenue.comred State8 p.m. Ziggy’s underground, 607 1/2 cherokee Bvld. (423) 265-8711.myspace.com/ziggy-sundergroundmusicmark Andrews 8 p.m. the Delta Queen, 100 River st. (423) 468-4500.deltaqueenhotel.netJohnston & brown8 p.m. acoustic café, 61 RBc Dr., Ringgold. (706) 965-2065. ringgoldacoustic.comThe Wailers9 p.m. track 29, 1400 market st, choo choo campus. (423) 266-5000track29.coThe Pool9 p.m. sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad st. (423) 508-8956. sugarsribs.comTaxicab racers 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 e. mlK Blvd.

(423) 266-1400. myspace.com/jjsbohemiaPatrick Scott9 p.m. Raw, 409 market st. (423) 756-1919. myspace.com/jimstrikermarty Adams9 p.m. the office (inside Days Inn), 901 carter st. (423) 634-9191. Find them on Facebook.Fifth Year Anniversary Party: Jordan Hallquist & Gabe Newell, Slim Pickins, Strung Like A Horse10 p.m. tremont tavern, 1203 hixson pk. (423) 266-1996. tremonttavern.comAbbey road Live 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 market st. (423) 267-4644. rhythm-brews.comNim Nims10 p.m. market street tavern, 850 market st. (423) 634-0260. .

Sun 12.04Sweet Georgia Sound 12:30 p.m. chattanooga market, 1829 carter st.(423) 648-2496. chattanooga-market.comThe Fells7 p.m. the honest pint, 35 patten pkwy. (423) 468-4192. thehonestpint.comdick delicious and The Tasty Testicles 8 p.m. Ziggy’s underground, 607 1/2 cherokee Bvld. (423) 265-8711.myspace.com/ziggy-sundergroundmusic Open Improvisational Jam8 p.m. Barking legs theater, 1307 Dodds ave.(423) 624-5347. barkinglegs.org

PULSE PICK

The Fells• Celtic is back at The Pint.Free. 7 p.m. the honest pint, 35 patten pkwy. (423) 468-4192. thehonestpint.com

Thursday • December 1JUCIFER

Friday • December 2Krumpus Day

Subterranean CirqusUnspoken Triumph • OxxenSaturday • December 3

Taxicab RacersHarrison Hudson

Tuesday • December 6Guilty Pleasures Dance Party

Friday • December 9W.B. Givens

Saturday • December 10Leaving Miss Blue • Black Betty

409 Market Street 423.756.1919

Party on Two Floors! 1st Floor: Live Music • 2nd Floor: Dancing

Sushi BarRestaurantNightclub

Monday NightFOOTBALL $2 DRAFTM

TOpen Mic

NIGHT50¢

WINGSW$3 SUSHI ROLLS WED. & THURS!

DJ SPICOLLI

T$1 BEER 10-11PM WEEKEND!

FRI LIVE MUSIC WITH

satCLAYTON LEE

$1 BEER 10-11PM LIVE MUSIC WITH

PATRICK SCOTT

DUBSTEPPARTY UPSTAIRS


mon 12.05The Oak ridge boys8 p.m. memorial auditorium, 399 mccallie ave. (423) 642-tIXs. chattanoogaonstage.comSouthside casual classics8 p.m. the camphouse, 1427 Williams st. (423) 702-8081. the-camphouse.com

Tue 12.06Family Force 5, Hawk Nelson, manafest, Tyler melashenko, Oaklynn, brando

7 p.m. the Warehouse, 412 market st. (423) 757-1569. ware-housevenue.comGuilty Pleasures dance Party8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 e. mlK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. myspace.com/jjsbohemia

Wed 12.07Prime cut Trio8 p.m. the lounge at the palms at hamilton, 6925 shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055.thepalmsathamilton.comLauren Alaina9 p.m. track 29,

1400 market st, choo choo campus. (423) 266-5000.track29.coStar and micey, raenbow Station9 p.m. the honest pint, 35 patten pkwy. (423) 468-4192. thehonestpint.comLong Gone darlings, Noah collins10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 market st. (423) 267-4644. rhythm-brews.com

Send live music list-ings at least 10 days in advance to: [email protected].

Friday, Dec. 2: 9pmMark “Porkchop” Holder

Saturday, Dec. 3: 9pmMarty Adams

Sunday, Dec. 4Sunday Night Football • $5 Pitchers

Tuesday, Dec. 6Server Appreciation Night

$5 Pitchers • $2 Wells • $1.50 Domestics

Facebook.com/theofficechatt

All shows are free with dinner or 2 drinks!Stop by & check out our daily specials!

Happy Hour: Mon-Fri: 4-7pm$1 10oz drafts, $3 32oz drafts,

$2 Wells, $1.50 Domestics, Free Appetizers

901 Carter St(Inside Days Inn)423-634-9191

Nightly Specials

Regular GigsThursdays

ben Friberg Trio7 p.m. table 2, 232 e. 11th st. (423) 756-8253. table2restaurant.comJimmy Harris7 p.m. the coconut Room at the palms at hamilton, 6925 shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055. thepalmsathamilton.comOpen mic Night7:30 p.m. the camphouse, 1427 Williams st. (423) 702-8081.thecamphouse.comblues Jam with rick rushing 7:30 p.m. market street tavern, 850 market st., (423) 634-0260. marketstreettavern.com

FridaysJohnny cash Tribute band5 p.m. chattanooga choo 1400 market st. (423) 266-5000. choochoo.comben Friberg Trio6:30 p.m. table 2, 232 east 11th st. (423) 756-8253. table2restaurant.comJimmy Harris7 p.m. the palms at hamilton, 6925 shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055. thepalmsathamilton.com

SaturdaysJohnny cash Tribute band5 p.m. chattanooga choo 1400 market st. (423) 266-5000. choochoo.comJimmy Harris7 p.m. the palms at hamilton, 6925 shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055.

thepalmsathamilton.com

SundaysIrish music Session3 p.m. the honest pint, 35 patten pkwy. (423) 468-4192. thehonestpint.com

mondaysmusic monday7 p.m. pasha coffee and tea,3914 st. elmo ave. (423) 475-5482. pashacoffeehouse.combig band Night8 p.m. the palms at hamilton, 6925 shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055. thepalmsathamilton.com

TuesdaysOpen mic with mike mcdade8 p.m. tremont tavern, 1203 hixson pk. (423) 266-1996. tremonttavern.comTroy Underwood8 p.m. southside saloon 1301 chestnut st., (423) 757-4730. southsidesaloonbistro.com

WednesdaysJimmy Harris6:30 p.m. the palms at hamilton, 6925 shallowford Rd. (423) 499-5055. thepalmsathamilton.comben Friberg Trio7 p.m. market street tavern, 850 market st. (423) 634-0260. Find them on Facebook.dJ ScubaSteve’s Jenntastic Wednesdays9 p.m. holiday Bowl, 5518 Brainerd Rd. (423) 899-2695. holidaybowlbrainerd.com


Between the sleevesSAN FRANCISCO BAY AREA-BASED guitarist Henry Kaiser has a decades-

spanning musical career, known as a restless sonic wan-derer and one of the forefathers of American free im-prov guitar. Taking early inspiration from unconven-tional guitarist Derek Bailey and Captain Beefheart, Kaiser has covered

a vast amount of territory, both musical-ly and physically, recording in places like Madagascar, Burma, and even Antarctica (documented in a Werner Herzog film); tying his diverse music together, whether crafting his own inventive pieces or paying tribute to acts such as Miles Davis and The Grateful Dead, Kaiser plays with impec-cable precision, curiosity, and a sense of purpose.

His new CD, Everything Forever, is com-prised of one 80-minute long “live trance” improvised guitar solo recorded in a single take without overdubs. The idea may be a

daunting one, but as expected from Kaiser, he stays moving with enough ideas to pro-pel the album. To free improv aficionados, what might be surprising isn’t what he uses but what he doesn’t use to hold the listen-er’s attention; no wild or oddball extended techniques are employed—a few crystal-line harmonics are about the extent of it—and Kaiser doesn’t even do string bends or vibrato. Most of the tones are clean, clear notes played on his Fender Stratocaster, with occasional glides, taking no apparent inspiration from a particular source and following no genre. Kaiser uses Lexicon stereo delay units, so that after a passage is heard in the center channel, it is repeated once in the left channel and soon after also in the right channel, and throughout the piece, Kaiser manages to adeptly sustain distinct bass and treble counterpoint.

Eighty minutes is certainly a time com-mitment, and listeners who expect dra-matic gestures or some kind of grand fi-nale will not get them, although the album is not totally free of crests and dips. The meditative meanderings of Everything Forever demonstrate that for a seasoned traveler like Kaiser, it’s the journey and not necessarily the destination that is key.

Henry Kaisereverything Forever(there)

ERNIE PAIK

OBSESSIVE RECORD COLLECTORS surely find parts of the films High Fidelity and Ghost World to ring true—in particu-

lar, the latter’s scene with 78 collector Seymour bemoan-ing the fact that calypso bandleader Lionel Belasco’s as-tounding work is unrecognized today. There’s a unique kind of joy in uncov-ering obscure and neglected gems, and there’s a certain archival philosophy that taps into this,

striving not to make “greatest hits” compi-lations but instead, “greatest should-have-been hits” collections. Harry Smith assem-bled his iconic and influential Anthology of American Folk Music by choosing tracks because of their peculiarity instead of popularity, and Mike McGonigal covered a mind-bogglingly diverse array of post-war gospel on his outstanding Fire in My Bones collection in 2009. Following that set comes McGonigal’s This May Be My Last Time Singing, a 3-CD trove of “raw African-American gospel” culled from ob-

scure 7” singles that were self-released or from regional labels.

Fire in My Bones is a tough act to fol-low, but This May Be My Last Time Sing-ing matches it in quality, with every single track having distinctive qualities that lead the listener to understand why it stood apart from the hundreds of uninteresting obscure singles in McGonigal’s collection that didn’t pass muster.

The collection, with annotations for ev-ery song, centers on the ’60s and ’70s, ap-parent at times with soul, pop, and funk influences manifested in organ vamps, electric guitar licks, or funky beats, but classic gospel call-and-response exchang-es are plentiful, as well. Spirited and mov-ing, these singers are clearly singing their hearts out, with an animated, unfettered vitality not commonly heard on slick stu-dio productions.

One tidbit sums it up—the liner notes point out that the slogan for the Bible Days Revival Church, which delivers the stir-ring “Supernatural Prayer” with a rowdy congregation shouting behind the pastor’s hypnotic vocal cadence, is “The church that’s different.” With affecting, memora-ble, and sometimes rough and low-fidelity recordings, the tracks on this set are cer-tainly different but no less reverent.

Various Artiststhis may Be my last time singing(tompkins square)

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Art CreationsHamilton Place

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Monday-Friday: 10 a.m. to 7 p.m.Saturday: 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.Sunday: 11 a.m. to 4 p.m.

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Monday-Friday: 9 a.m. to 6 p.m.Saturday: 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.

Sunday: Closed(423) 266-3626

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This Holiday SeasonWe’ve Got Your

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and their architectural firm has produced a significant impact on downtown Chattanooga. From the shuttle bus stop shelters to Renaissance Park to the new look of Warehouse Row, many Chat-tanoogans are familiar with their work. Heidi Hefferlin will also present architectural drawings.

Another son, Ray Kronenberg, will be showing his photographs. He is the namesake of Ray Hef-ferlin, a physicist who will bring diagrams of diatomic molecules, offering a look into the very small scale of our natural world. Ray Hefferlin is Heidi Hefferlin’s fa-ther.

Celebrated painter Melissa Hef-ferlin (married to Daud Ahkriev, stepmother to Timor) will also bring work to this show. Her oil painting “Taking Tea” was added to the Hunter Museum’s collection in 2010. Her often lightly toned and sometimes whimsical subjects have been endeared to Chatta-noogans for some time now.

Inelda Hefferlin and Lorene

Powers have quilts hanging at this opening. The art of quilting has been gaining wider recognition in both the folk and fine art realms.

Finally, Jennifer Harrell will present a farm master plan of great interest, especially to those who realize the importance of land use.

Such an accomplished family show ought to be a great delight for art lovers. Be sure to attend!

by michael Crumb

AMONG THE MAINX24 EVENTS, PLANET Altered’s gallery on Main Street will host a very unusu-al and rewarding art opening featuring diverse works from one of Chattanooga’s most creative families. The name of this show is “Patterns”, and it will focus on patterns that we encounter in our lives.

Although this show is not listed on the MainX24 ad-vance cards, it will open on Saturday, Dec. 3, and run through the end of January 2012. The wide diversity of media presented will provide much interest, and view-ers will be able to compare works ranging from archi-tectural drawings to quilts, including scientific data scans as well as paintings and photographs.

Probably the best-known artist of this family, Daud Ahkriev has recently completed his statuary installation at First Street by Market Street, where the large figures “Fall” and “Winter” stand tall on adjoining pedestals. The whole “Four Seasons” installation can now eas-ily be viewed together, where the first statues, “Spring” and “Summer” flank the entrance to the Market Street Bridge.

“Fall” and “Winter” are dramatic and voluptuous, perched on spheres, indicating their pervasive and in-tense influences on our planet. Nature’s seasons trans-form the context of our lives, and they continually in-spire artists.

Daud Ahkriev has been best known as a painter, and his more recent paintings have shown startling concep-tual developments that have heightened the impact of his work. His development of the Market Street sculp-tural group has been wonderfully received. These fig-ures show a beautiful intricacy that sustains multiple views.

Ahkriev’s son Timor Ahkriev has been showing his paintings at the AVA Gallery on Frazier Avenue. A num-ber of landscapes show his stylistic versatility. Both Daud and Timor Ahkriev will contribute paintings to the family exhibition at Planet Altered.

Devon Kronenberg will present a remarkable “ab-stract” painting in a purple tonality from oil and sand. “DSCF2044.JPG” (2009) actually represents a pixilated computer image, so in this rather unique approach ab-straction and representation converge through a math-ematical process. Though purple is the dominant tonal-ity in this work, there are other tones, and the medium of mixed oil and sand promises an engaging texture. Devon Kronenberg has also been engaged with other styles, and his landscapes and urban facades are fine ac-complishments.

Devon’s father Craig Kronenberg will be bring-ing both architectural drawings and a maquette of an imaginary high-rise building. Although Kronenberg did design high rises that were built in the Philippines, this particular building remained in its potential state.

Heidi Hefferlin is married to Craig Kronenberg,

Art of the City

The Family That Shows Together

“After the Sunset, Olvera, Spain” by Timur Akhriev

“Patterns”opening Dec. 3 during mainX2410 a.m. – 5 p.m.planet altered, 48 e. main st.(423) 400-4100. planetaltered.com

devon Kronenberg


Thur 12.01Natural Instincts11 a.m. In-town gallery, 26a Frazier ave. (423)267-9214. intowngallery.comScreening of The Little match Girl, accompanied by cricket & Snail6.m. hunter museum, 10 Bluff View. (423) 267-0968. huntermuseum.orgenchanted Garden of Lights6 p.m. Rock city, 1400 patten Rd. lookout mountain, ga. (800) 854-0675.seerockcity.comA christmas carol7 p.m. center for creative arts, 1301 Dallas Rd. (423) 209-5942. mystery of TV TalkShow7 p.m. Vaudeville café, 138 market st. (423) 517-1839. funnydinner.comLive Team Trivia7 p.m. t-Bones sports cafe, 1419 chestnut street.UTc men’s &Women’s choruses7:30 p.m. patten chapel, utc. utc.edu/music

Fri 12.02North Pole Limited5:45, 7:30, 9:15 p.m. chattanooga grand Junction, 4119 cromwell Rd. (423) 894-8028. tvrail.comThe royal Family6:30 p.m. Flo summit theatre, First-centenary united methodist church, 419 mccallie ave. (423) 756-2428. oakstreetplay-house.commystery of Flight 1387 p.m. Vaudeville café, 138 market

st. (423) 517-1839. funnydinner.comA christmas carol7 p.m. center for creative arts, 1301 Dallas Rd. (423) 209-5942.James Greggory7:30, 10 p.m. the comedy catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. thecomedycatch.comHave A Seat7:30 p.m. ensem-ble theatre of chattanooga, 1918 union st. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreof-chattanooga.combehold The Lamb7:30 p.m. Re:create café, salvation army, 800 mccallie ave. (423) 756-1023. csarmy.orgIt’s a Wonderful Life7:30 p.m. the gem theater, 700 tennessee ave. etowah. (423) 263-3270.beauty and the beast7:30 p.m.

the colonnade, 264 catoosa circle, Ringgold, ga. (706) 935-9000. colonnadecenter.orgemperor’s New clothes7:30 p.m. chattanooga theatre centre, 400 River st. (423) 267-8534. theatrecentre.comLorrie morgan8 p.m. memorial auditorium, 399 mccallie ave. (423) 757-5156. chattanooga.govWide Open Floor9 p.m. Barking legs theater, 1307 Dodds ave. (423) 624-5347. barkinglegs.org Live Team Trivia9 p.m. amigo’s mexican Restaurant, 5450 hwy 153. (423) 875-8049. chattanoogatrivia.comStand Up comedy: Jason russell & cori Healy9:30 p.m. Vaudeville café, 138 market st. (423) 517-1839. funnydinner.com

Female Impersonation Showmidnight. Images, 6065 lee hwy. (423) 855-8210.imagesbar.com

Sat 12.03mainX246 a.m. main st. & the southside neighborhood. mainx24.comchattanooga market: Holiday market10 a.m. First tennesee pavilion, 1826 Reggie White Blvd. chattanooga-market.comWinter Wonders exhibit10 a.m. creative Discovery museum, 321 chestnut st. (423) 648-6043. cdmfun.orgHelping Hands exhibit10 a.m. creative Discovery museum, 321 chestnut st. (423) 648-6043. cdmfun.orgHiwassee Wildlife refuge by Kayak with TN Aquarium10 a.m. hiwassee Wildlife Refuge, 525 priddy ln. Birchwood. (931) 484-9571.

outdoorchat-tanooga.com$5 Felines Adoption event10 a.m. the pet placement center, 5975 Dayton Blvd. (423) 877-0738.thalppc.comGA Winery Santa’s Wine Workshopnoon. georgia Winery, 6469 Battlefield pkwy. (706) 937-WIne. georgiawines.comHave A Seat2 p.m. ensemble theatre of chattanooga, 1918 union st. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreof-chattanooga.commystery at the Nightmare Office Party5:30 p.m. Vaudeville café, 138 market st. (423) 517-1839. funnydinner.comNorth Pole Limited5:45, 7:30, 9:15 p.m. chattanooga grand Junction, 4119 cromwell Rd. (423) 894-8028. tvrail.comenchanted Garden of Lights6 p.m. Rock city,

Arts entertainment&

PULSE PICK

martha, marcy, may, marlene• AEC Independent Films resume with tale of cult refugee rejoining her family. multiple screening times. majestic 12, 311 Broad st. (423) 265-5220. carmike.com


1400 patten Rd. lookout mountain, ga. (800) 854-0675. seerockcity.comThe royal Family6:30 p.m. Flo summit theatre, First-centenary united methodist church, 419 mccallie ave. (423) 756-2428. oakstreetplay-house.comA christmas carol7 p.m. center for creative arts, 1301 Dallas Rd. (423) 209-5942.behold The Lamb7:30 p.m. Re:create café, salvation army, 800 mccallie ave. (423) 756-1023. csarmy.orgIt’s a Wonderful Life7:30 p.m. the gem theater, 700 tennessee ave. etowah. (423) 263-3270.beauty and the beast7:30 p.m. the colonnade, 264 catoosa circle, Ringgold, ga. (706) 935-9000. colonnadecenter.orgemperor’s New clothes7:30 p.m. chattanooga theatre centre, 400 River st. (423) 267-8534. theatrecentre.comJames Greggory7:30, 10 p.m. the comedy catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. thecomedycatch.commystery at the redneck-Italian Wedding8 p.m. Vaudeville café, 138 market st. (423) 517-1839. funnydinner.comLantern Tours8:30 p.m. Ruby Falls, 1720 s scenic hwy. (423) 821-2544. rubyfalls.com

Stand Up comedy: Jason russell & cori Healy10:30 p.m. Vaudeville café, 138 market st. (423) 517-1839. funnydinner.comFemale Impersonation Showmidnight. Images, 6065 lee hwy. (423) 855-8210. imagesbar.com

Sun 12.04deck The Falls8 a.m. Ruby Falls, 1720 s scenic hwy. (423) 821-2544. rubyfalls.comchattanooga market: Holiday market11 a.m. First tennesee pavilion, 1826 Reggie White Blvd. chatta-noogamarket.comFree First Sundaynoon. hunter mu-seum, 10 Bluff View. (423) 267-0968. huntermuseum.orgIt’s a Wonderful Life2 p.m. the gem theater, 700 tennessee ave. etowah. (423) 263-3270.beauty and the beast2:30 p.m. the colonnade, 264 catoosa circle, Ringgold, ga. (706) 935-9000. colonnadecenter.org“A chamber Noel” with the cSO3 p.m. the sheraton Read house hotel, 827 Broad st. (423) 266-4121.A classic christmas concert - ccr3 p.m. lee university, 1120 n ocoee st., cleveland. (423) 614-8000. leeuniversity.eduThe Polar express5 p.m. ImaX theater

at the tennessee aquarium, 1 Broad st. (800) 265-0695. tnaqua.orgNorth Pole Limited5:45, 7:30 p.m. chattanooga grand Junction, 4119 cromwell Rd. (423) 894-8028. tvrail.comenchanted Garden of Lights6 p.m. Rock city, 1400 patten Rd. lookout mountain, ga. (800) 854-0675. seerockcity.comcaroling with the Fishes6:30 p.m. tennessee aquarium, 1 Broad st. (423) 648-2496. tnaqua.orgHave A Seat6:30 p.m. ensemble theatre of chattanooga, 1918 union st. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreof-chattanooga.comSunday Slasher Films7 p.m. sluggo’s Vegetarian café,

501 cherokee Blvd. (423) 752-5224.

mon 12.05deck The Falls8 a.m. Ruby Falls, 1720 s scenic hwy. (423) 821-2544. rubyfalls.comenchanted Garden of Lights6 p.m. Rock city, 1400 patten Rd. lookout mountain, ga. (800) 854-0675. seerockcity.comLive Team Trivia6 p.m. Bart’s lakeshore, 5840 lake Resort ter. (423) 870-0770. chattanoogatrivia.com“Women of Letters”: ruth Holmberg, ruth and chocolate7 p.m. Jewish cultural center, 5461 north terrace Rd. (423) 493-0270. jewishchatta-nooga.comThe Oak ridge boys christmas concert7:30 p.m. memorial auditorium,

399 mccallie ave. (423) 757-5156. chattanooga.govPauly Shore7:30 p.m. the comedy catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. thecomedycatch.com

Tue 12.06deck The Falls8 a.m. Ruby Falls, 1720 s scenic hwy. (423) 821-2544. rubyfalls.comenchanted Garden of Lights6 p.m. Rock city, 1400 patten Rd. lookout mountain, ga. (800) 854-0675. seerockcity.comSongwriter’s Line-up7 p.m. the camphouse, 1427 Williams st. (423) 702-8081. thecamphouse.comLive Team Trivia7:30 p.m. Brewhaus, 224 Frazier ave. (423) 531-8490. chattanoogatrivia.com

Wed 12.07deck The Falls8 a.m. Ruby Falls, 1720 s scenic hwy. (423) 821-2544. rubyfalls.commain Street Farmer’s market4 p.m. main st. at Williams st.enchanted Garden of Lights6 p.m. Rock city, 1400 patten Rd. lookout mountain, ga. (800) 854-0675. seerockcity.comLive Team Trivia7:30 p.m. Buffalo Wild Wings, 120 market st. (423) 634-0468. chattanoogatrivia.com

Email calendar items to: [email protected].

PULSE PICK

mainx24 Fashion Show• From the inventive minds at Collective Clothing and Zombi Candi. Free. 4 p.m. chattanooga choo choo, 1400 market st. mainx24.com


Stop Violence. Give Hope.92 domestic violence fatalities were reported last year in Tennessee. Partnership’s Family Violence Center has been breaking the cycle of violence

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Call 755-2700 to stop the violence.Visit StopViolenceGiveHope.org to give hope.


NO MATTER HOW MuCH I ARGuE against movies that substitute slick spe-cial effects, nonstop action scenes, and plot-driven stories for good writing and character development, I know deep down that I’m a hypocrite.

I can criticize Michael Bay movies end-lessly for focusing on visuals to the detri-ment of story. I can call Sucker Punch the worst movie of the year because it was es-sentially one long experiment in comput-er-generated graphics. I can make jokes about the stilted dialogue commonplace in many comic-book films. But in the back of my mind, I know that I once drove 12 hours to New York City to camp out in front of the Ziegfeld Theater for tickets to Star Wars: Episode III – The Revenge of the Sith.

I like to tell myself that it was for a good cause; all proceeds from ticket sales went to charity. But I know that if pressed, I couldn’t tell you what charity it was for. For all I know, I might have been support-ing a group that reintroduces nerds into the wild. No, I went because it was “Star Wars” and “Star Wars” has light sabers and Wookies and the Force and space-ships and is so much cooler than Harry Potter ever will be. Just this weekend, I spent an inordinate amount of time ig-noring my family in order to beta test a new computer game based in the “Star Wars” universe. If I wasn’t careful (and had unlimited access to funds), I might have something of a problem. So when my editor offered me a chance to review an advance copy of the paperback release of The Secret History of Star Wars: The Art of Storytelling and the Making of a Mod-ern Epic by Michael Kaminski, I was cau-tious. By cautious, I mean I immediately ordered a copy and set up a tent by the mailbox.

The book arrived last week. It is ap-proximately 450 pages in ten-point font and contains eight (8!) appendices. The amount of detail included in the book is astonishing. It goes beyond any documen-tary included on any release thus far, com-piling facts from innumerable interviews conducted with cast, crew, and associates from the beginning of the film releases. It contains excerpts from multiple drafts of every script from every movie, with com-mentary and in-depth analysis of plot changes and character development. It is,

in a word, tedious. That isn’t a criticism really, as I found the tedium fascinating and fun. It simply reads like a textbook. If there were a college course on “The mak-ing of Star Wars”, this would be required reading.

As much as I love the subject, the book isn’t without its faults. There is no primary source information; everything is second-ary, pulled from interviews, scripts, and press details. Kaminski has a tendency to indulge tangential informa-tion; there are long passages explain-ing the films of Akira Kurosawa and their influ-ence on George Lucas. The au-thor’s voice is dry and at times can read like an academic thesis, inter-ested in pad-ding word count or cov-ering mate-rial inter-esting only to experts. The book isn’t for the casual “Star Wars” fan or moviegoer. It is for the obsessed only.

The most interest-

ing part of the book for me is the charac-terization of George Lucas as a filmmaker. In particular, Larry Kasdan, screenwriter of The Empire Strikes Back was quoted as saying, “[George] doesn’t care about the relationships between people beyond the broad strokes…what he’s interested in is moving the plot forward. He doesn’t want to see a three-minute scene about charac-ter.”

Lucas is described consistently as an experimental, visual filmmaker. Film for him is primarily about the visual experi-ence, not the emotional impact of charac-ter discovery. Actors for Lucas aren’t much different than props, which is why R2-D2 gives as good a performance as Harrison Ford. It also explains why good actors like Natalie Portman and Ewan McGregor are so wooden in the prequels. But for all his faults in working with actors, Lucas has led the way in the development of spe-cial effects. He created Industrial Light and Magic with the profits from the “Star Wars” franchise. Without his efforts, we would never have seen dinosaurs come to life or learned what shapes a boggart can take. Before we dismiss his blatant mer-chandising and constant reissues as mere greed, we should look at what he’s given us as an audience.

“The Secret History of Star Wars” was an enjoyable read for me. I was worried that I might have finally outgrown the series. I recently sold all my “Star Wars” books and didn’t even consider buying the Blu Ray release. But the other day, while

watching Disney’s Beauty and the Beast with my 2 year old, I asked

him what happened to the Beast at the end. He looked at me, smiled and said, “He’s turning

into Luke Skywalker.” I guess I’m not the only hope. There

is another.

screen

Revenge of the ‘Star Wars’ NerdsJOHN dEVORE

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“[George] doesn’t care about the relationships between people beyond the broad strokes…what he’s interested in is moving the plot forward. He doesn’t want to see a three-minute scene about character.

The Secret History of Star Wars: The Art of Storytelling and the making of a modern EpicBy michael Kaminski. legacy Book press, 2011, $39.95.


sushi Biscuits mIKE mCJUNKIN&

If you look closely, somewhere, tucked away in a corner will be a glass case filled with fresh-baked breads and pastries. Pan dulce: a chewy, lightly sweetened Mexican bread topped with a sweet, topping and bu-ñuelo: a thin, deep-fried pastry normally sprinkled with a cinnamon-and-sugar mix-ture is delicious and comforting. If the gods are with you, there will be bolillo, the bread used to make the crack of the sandwich world, the Mexican torta.

Come for the butt, stay for the liver

The best parts of the local carniceria are the butcher shop and the restaurant, an in-credible resource for inexpensive eats. They have beef, chicken, and some seafood, usu-ally tilapia and shrimp, but the star of the show is our friend Mr. Pig. LOA # 7 at Main and Market will even order a whole pig for you if you are in the mood for a little roast piggy. But whatever animal you decide to invite for dinner, rest assured every part of

that animal is available and very reasonably priced.

Stroll a little further back to the wondrous land of the carniceria restaurant. There are old tables, mismatched chairs and figur-ing out where to order may be a guessing game at first. But once you get your bear-ings you’ll find many familiar foods, just in an unfamiliar setting: carne asada (grilled steak), chorizo (a fresh Mexican sausage), pollo (chicken), or lengua (beef tongue. The tacos are usually $1.25 to $1.50 each and come in two corn tortillas with a variety of condiments you can add yourself.

Keep in mind that you may have to ask to see the full menu—sometimes only the day’s specials or the taco menu is displayed to the general public. At LOA #6 on Lee Highway, the asada plate is a must-have. A huge pile of lean, perfectly seasoned steak is cooked to order, chopped into small pieces and served with their home-style beans and rice with tortillas. Once you get your food you can belly up to the condiment bar and pimp

South of the Border

ALTHOuGH CARNICERIA LITERALLY MEANS “BuTCHER SHOP” IN Spanish, most of the carnicerias in Chattanooga look like a small market when you first step through the door. The grocery aisles are a mix of the familiar and the not-so-familiar. Pasta and spaghetti sauce may share an aisle with prepared moles and tamarind pods. The spice sections in the larger carnicerias are a gold-mine of what are considered specialty or hard-to-find spices in the big chain stores. You can find dried lavender, eucalyptus, and even hibiscus for less than a bottle of McCormick black pepper.


your platter with an array of sauces, salsas, including cactus (salsa nopalitos) and a gua-camole that is spectacular. This guacamole is not dip like you get at the Americanized Latin places, it is almost saucelike in consis-tency, and those big balls in the guacamole are the avocado pits. Just leave them in the pan. LOA #7 has a slightly smaller restau-rant, but on Fridays they serve a whole, fried tilapia plate for the same price you’d pay for a fish sandwich, fries, drink and a side of shame at the golden arches. It’s a whole fish, so take advantage of those little tasty mor-sels of tilapia cheek meat that we rarely ever get here in the South.

Remember, when you see the latest Bobby Flay meat-and-two-sauces recipe or when you find a perfect dish but it has that expen-sive or unfamiliar ingredient, check with your local carniceria or market. Odds are good they will have just what you need and it will be cheaper, better quality, and you will be supporting a local business.

Hot off the griddle• Good Fences brewery, started by the

owners of The Georgia Winery, has re-leased an IPA as their flagship beer.

• The owners of Petunia’s Silver Jala-peno are getting ready to open Gin Gin’s, a full-service, contemporary Southern restau-rant in Walden.

• On Dec. 3, mainx24 has some interest-ing events:

• 8 to 11 a.m. in Niedlov’s parking lot, Link 41 will be lard-frying Niedlov’s doughnuts.

• 2 to 4 p.m. The Terminal brewhouse will be showcasing molecular gastronomy.

• 7 to 9 p.m. Fiesta at Taqueria Jalisco with a mariachi band, complimentary san-gria and food specials.

Mike McJunkin is a foodie, chef, musician and, in his spare time, keeps our computers and networks running smoothly. Got a tip for the column? Email him at [email protected].

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Free Will Astrology ROb bREzSNY

ARIES (march 21-april 19): this would be an excellent week to head down to pucón, chile, and hire a daredevil to fly you in a helicopter into the caldera of the active Villarrica volcano, whereupon you would bungee-jump out of the copter down to within 700 feet of the molten lava. If that’s too extreme or ex-pensive for your tastes, I urge you to come up a milder ad-venture that will still bring you a close encounter with primal heat and light—and maybe even some divine fire.

TAURUS (april 20-may 20): as a mouse looks for food or shelter, it is flexible enough to fit through a hole as small as a quarter of an inch. You would re-ally benefit from having a talent like that right now, taurus. of course, even if you are as slip-pery and pliable, you will also have to be on alert for the invit-ing possibilities. For example, let’s say you spy an interest-ing-looking person with whom you’d love to chat. the window of opportunity may be open for less than 10 seconds. seize that moment! Refuse to get hung up in shyness. Don’t convince yourself that another chance will come along later.

GEmINI (may 21-June 20): one of my gemini acquain-tances, tara, has been playing a slow-moving game of tag with three friends since they were all in second grade together. they’re all 27 now, and still live in the same city. currently, tara is “It,” but she confided in me that she plans to make a move this week. she says she’ll sneak up on one of the other players during his lunch break at work, tag him, and run away before he can tag her back. I told her she’s likely to meet with suc-cess, since this is an excellent time for you geminis to gain an advantage in any kind of game you’re playing.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): “Far more crucial than what we know or do not know is what we do not want to know,” wrote philosopher eric hoffer. this is a good idea for you to contem-plate right now. I realize it may be a challenge for you to figure out what you would rather not know and are afraid to know and might even be allergic to know-ing. still, I hope you’ll make the effort. maybe you could enlist a smart ally who’d be skillful in helping you uncover the taboo truth. and maybe you could formulate an intention to be as objective as you’ve ever been.

LEO (July 23-aug. 22): Biolo-gists say there are 680 species

of trees and shrubs in the u.s. and canada. By comparison, lambir hills national park on the island of Borneo is the home of 1,175 species on its 128 acres. I suspect you will feel right at home in places like lambir hills in the coming week, leo. Your own creative urges will be run-ning hotter than usual, and are most likely to thrive in contexts that are themselves teeming with lush fertility. surround yourself with inspirational influ-ences, giving yourself the best possible chance to express yourself with vivid imagination.

VIRGO (aug. 23-sept. 22): “people travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home,” wrote philosopher Dagobert D. Runes. Your assignment, Virgo, should you choose to accept it, is to refute that assertion. In other words, I’m inviting you to travel to all of your usual haunts and treat everything that hap-pens there with the attitude of a first-time visitor. Just assume that the familiar people and places in your life have stimu-lating gifts to give and lessons to impart. Remember, though, they can’t do that to the fullest unless you expect them to.

LIbRA (sept. 23-oct. 22): the human brain is composed of 30 percent protein and 70 percent fat. so it wouldn’t be incorrect to refer to you as a fathead. In order to nourish your brain cells, you’ve got to eat foods that provide two essential fatty acids your body doesn’t manu-facture: omega-3 ala and ome-ga-6 la. since you’re now in a “brain-building” phase of your astrological cycle, I urge you to get more than your minimum requirements of these basics. I suggest that you also expose yourself to a lot of extraordi-narily phat sources of intellec-tual stimulation.

SCORPIO (oct. 23-nov. 21): the mawashi is the loincloth that Japanese sumo wrestlers wear while competing. It’s rare for the garment to come off, but it did happen once in 2000, when a wrestler named asa-nokiri suddenly found himself standing naked during his bout with chiyohakuho. In conformi-ty with sumo’s rules, asanokiri was immediately disqualified. I don’t think you’re at risk for be-ing rendered literally unclothed in the heat of a showdown, scorpio. But I do advise you to take extra precautions to pre-vent a metaphorical version of that occurrence.

SAGITTARIUS (nov. 22-Dec. 21): “Dear mr. Brezsny:

my name is sonny mcgee and I own a website that caters to people who are addicted to playing poker. I’m wondering if you would like to advertise your work to our audience. gamblers love astrology! get in touch.—sagittarian Wheeler Dealer.” Dear Dealer: thanks, but I’ll pass. I don’t like to encourage anyone to focus their gambling urges on trivial matters like card games. I prefer they direct that mojo to high-minded stuff like daring themselves to excel and doing brave things to help save the world. By the way, it’s prime time for you sagittarians to ratchet up your commitment to those kinds of gambles.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I hope you’re not so perversely attached to your demons that you’re inclined to keep providing them with a comfortable home. Why? Be-cause the coming weeks will be an excellent time for you to permanently banish them from the premises. Yes, I know it may seem lonely at first without their nagging, disruptive voices chat-tering away in your head. But I really do encourage you to bid them adieu. By the way, as you plan your exorcism, you might want to include a humorous touch or two. they’re allergic to satire and mockery, you know.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): the Beauvais cathe-dral in northern France has been called “the most daring achievement of gothic archi-tecture.” there’s a problem with the place, however—it has never been completed. Work began in the year 1225, and experts are still talking about how to solve certain ongoing difficulties with its construction. I don’t know when this happy ending will oc-cur, aquarius, but I do expect that in 2012 you will be able to put the finishing touches on your own personal version of the Beauvais cathedral.

PISCES (Feb. 19-march 20): In my prayers, I’ve been ne-gotiating with the goddess to grant you the power to change the course of rivers, at least in a metaphorical way. I’ve also be-seeched her to show you how to overthrow the puppet mas-ter and convert overwrought hawks into savvy doves. the goddess seems to be seriously considering these appeals, and has even hinted she might of-fer you instructions on how to shape a new adam out of one of eve’s ribs, mythically speaking. In return, she does have one re-quest: that you do what you can to make sure the sun rises on schedule for the next 10 days.


Jonesin’ Crossword

“OUT FOR THE dAY”—dISH UP, dIG IN, dROP OUT.

ACROSS1. late november drowsiness11. ___ Friday’s (restaurant chain)14. You, you, you, or me15. Dungeons & Dragons creatures17. they’re used in repair of fractures18. Bump into19. “gone in 60 seconds” director Dominic20. org. that assigns numerical IDs21. Fashion model/volleyball player gabrielle22. tone loc single released just after “Funky cold medina”25. controversial engineering28. lacto-___ vegetarian29. “then what happened?”30. think it could possibly be31. himalayan country:

abbr.32. trippy stuff33. “this american life” host glass34. Vietnam memorial designer maya35. they’re found in kids’ books42. massive Brit. lexicon43. shiba ___ (cute dog breed)44. Duration of amateur boxing matches, often46. seasonal help48. Forbidden topics: var.49. WWII naval vessel50. “there ___ substitute for...”53. suffix after manhattan or mccarthy54. giving the cold shoulder57. part of cD58. they swing on a steady basis59. uK mil. award60. cause of 1-across, it’s said

dOWN1. File folder feature2. ones, to Juan

3. Baseball hall of Famer sandberg4. nimoy and shatner co-star5. Facebook status word for some6. “___ Blues” (Beatles song)7. It goes under your glass8. away from the workplace9. “axis ___” (1995 album by the shamen)10. “Bite my shiny metal ___!” (“Futurama” phrase)11. “anger management” actress12. scallion13. like antarctica16. note takers’ needs21. hopeful, as outlooks go23. “I’m ___ Boat”24. 1968 federal law regulating firearms, for

short25. extremely angry26. stealthily implied27. 69 and 101, but not 8635. Rural rds.36. their, to a herr37. searcher for oil38. mass per unit volume39. It has a descender when written in lower case40. Before, to a poet41. alfonso of baseball45. use a plunger47. Village Voice gossip columnist michael51. “the secret of ___” (1982 animated movie)52. Draft classification54. Invoice fig.55. “Wayne’s World” rejoinder56. channel that revived “the newlywed game”

mATT JONES

Jonesin’ Crossword created By Matt Jones. © 2011 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 0548.

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There are those who died extremely young—like Sid Vicious (21), Buddy Holly (22) and River Phoenix (23), for example. It’s always crushing to think about what they might have accomplished had they lived, and sad to think they’ll be known for so little. Two of those deaths could have likely been avoided if the youthful attitude of “immortality” hadn’t been in play.

Then there’s the “27 Club” of rock stars who died at 27 years of age. Blues legend Rob-ert Johnson, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison, Brian Jones, Kurt Cobain, D. Boon (Minutemen), Pete Ham (Badfinger), Chris Bell (Big Star) and just this year, Amy Winehouse, are all part of that elite group.

I don’t understand why that age is so pivotal in a rock star’s life, but apparently your 27th birthday is the exact moment when drugs, depression and accidents are most likely to cut your time short—just in your

prime.Those celebrities

who lived to be 100 are fewer, but certainly more fortunate. George Burns, Bob Hope, Eliz-abeth, the Queen Moth-er, Rose Kennedy and Strom Thurmond all

left their mark for a century or more before taking a perpetual dirt nap.

What always makes me grin is someone taken back in amaze-ment when they learn that a star they thought was long gone is still kicking. Personally, I was amazed to see Betty White get tackled by football players at age 89 in a Snicker’s commer-cial. But I was also amazed to see her on Golden Girls in the ’80s, for that matter. I thought she’d long passed into oblivion in the ’70s when all she did were game show appearances—post “Mary Tyler Moore”, of course.

So with that in mind, I’ve de-cided to reveal some of the most astounding “still living” celebri-ty cases I could dig up (no pun). Keep in mind I write these col-umns a week out, so some may

have met their maker by press time.

Dick Van Dyke—still kick-ing at 85, no shit. And he looks fantastic. In fact, I just recently saw him on CBS Sunday Morn-ing doing a rap song with the Red Hot Chili Peppers’ Chad Smith.

The “real” James Bond—Sean Connery—age 80. You really can’t kill Mr. Bond, now can you? That in mind, we all know William Shatner is still at the top of his game—also at 80, be-lieve it or not. Then there’s what I call the “73 Club” with Morgan Freeman, Jack Nicolson, Jane Fonda, Anthony Hopkins and Dustin Hoffman. Al Pacino (70) is just slightly older than Har-rison Ford (68), but three years

older than Robert DeNiro (67). These are celebrities we still

see very regularly on the silver screen. Let’s throw in a few you never hear from any more—and probably thought had moved on to that great gig in the sky.

The one I personally was tak-en back by the most is Phyllis Diller—still alive at 94. Mickey Rooney, who I think starred in silent films for Pete’s sake, is still around at age 91. And remember Abe Vigoda who played the lovable character Fish on Barney Miller? He’s still alive at 90. Hell, I thought he was 70 back in the ’70s.

Speaking of people we last heard from in the ’70s, legend-ary director, actor and proud papa to aging actor/director Rob, Carl Reiner, is now 89. In fact, Norman Lear, who cre-ated TV’s All in the Family co-

starring Rob Reiner as “Meat-head” is also 89. So is Sid Cae-sar. Their buddy Mel Brooks of Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein fame is 85. So are Andy Griffith, Hugh Hefner and Chuck Berry.

There are some stars you don’t think are as old as they really are. Mike Wallace of 60 Minutes is 93. So is evangelist Billy Graham. Kirk Douglas—Michael Douglas’s father—is 94. And so is Zsa Zsa Gabor.

Then there are those who you thought were older than they really are—just because it seems they’ve been around for-ever. Like Dick Clark, who’s just 81. Larry Hagman, who starred in I Dream of Jeannie in the ’60s and the ’80’s TV drama Dallas, is just 80 years old. And former President Jimmy Carter isn’t a day over 87.

I have no idea how long I’ll live or how famous I’ll become but like everyone, I hope to live a long, healthy life before my star stops shining.

Just Glad To Be HereTHE MORTALITY OF CELEBRITIES IS ONE OF THE most interesting phenomena of stargazing to me. Whether they die too young or live to be 100, it seems like they always go abruptly, and in methods that are usually just as uncom-mon as their fame.

Life in the noog CHUCK CROWdER

Chuck Crowder is a local writer and general man about town. His opinions are just that. Everything expressed is loosely based on fact, and crap he hears people talking about. Take what you just read with a grain of salt, but pepper it in your thoughts.

“I’ve decided to reveal some of the most astounding ‘still living’ celebrity cases I could dig up.

dick Van dyke—still kicking at 85, no shit.

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The Pulse 8.48 » Dec. 1-7, 2011