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procrastination
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ByTimUrban
TheProcrastinationMatrix
Note:Tobestunderstandthispost,youshouldfirstreadPart1ofWaitButWhyspreviouspostonprocrastination.
___________
Backinhighschool,ifyouhadaskedmeifIwereaprocrastinator,Iwouldhavesaidyes.Highschoolstudentsaregivenalltheselecturesaboutpacingyourselfonlongerprojects,andIproudlypacedmyselflessthanalmostanyoneIknew.Inevermissedadeadline,butIonlydidanythingthenightbeforeitwasdue.Iwasaprocrastinator.
ExceptIwasnt.Highschoolisfullofregulardeadlinesandshort-termprojects,andevenlongtermprojectshadsub-deadlinesthatforcepacinguponyou.Therewereafewdiremoments,butforthemostpart,IwasjustdoingeverythingatthelastminutebecauseIknewIcouldprobablystilldowellthatwaysowhynot.
TherewasdefinitelyanInstantGratificationMonkey inmyhead,buthewascutemorethananything.Withdeadlinesloomingconstantly,myPanicMonster wasneverfullyasleep,andthemonkeyknewthatwhilehecouldhavesometimeatthewheeleachday,hewasnttheoneincharge.
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Oneday,highschoolended,andsodidmylifeasasomewhatnormal-actingperson.Collegeisnotlikehighschool.Theassignmentsarebig,withalotoftimebetweendeadlines,andsinceyourenotachildanymore,classesdonttreatyoulikeonenooneforcesyoutopaceanything.AsaGovernmentmajor,mostofmyclassesinvolvedacouplepapers,amidterm,andafinalexamoverafour-monthstretch,whichmeansmostofthetime,therewerenoharddeadlinesanywhereonthehorizon.
Withoutdeadlinestooccupyhim,myPanicMonster,whocantthinktoofarahead,begantospendalotoftimeinhibernation.MyRationalDecision-Maker,whoneverrealizedhowmuchhehadreliedonthePanicMonster,begantohavedifficultiescarryingouthisplans.
ThemorethePanicMonsterslept,themoreconfidencethemonkeygained.TheRationalDecision-Maker,theonlymemberofthebrainwhoseestheworldclearly,wasconcernedheknewthatcollegeassignmentswerealotbiggerthanhighschoolassignments,andthatpacingwasnolongersomethingtoscoffat,butacriticalthingtodo.Hedputhisfootdownaboutsocialcommitmentswhenadeadlinebegantodrawcloser,butthatwouldntsolvetheproblem.
TheRDMwouldslipfurtherintodespair,andonlythetimeswhenthingsreachedtheirmostdirewouldanythingchange.
ItdidntmatterhowobviousadecisionseemedtotheRDM,itwasbecomingclearthathewastotallyunabletocontrolthemonkeywithoutthePanicMonstershelp.
WhilecollegewasoftenadishearteningexperienceformyRDM,itwasafullrenaissanceformyInstantGratificationMonkey,whoexploredawiderangeofactivitiesinanefforttofindhimself.WithaYamahaelectrickeyboardrightnexttomydesk,themonkeybecameincreasinglypassionateaboutplayingthepiano.ItalmostseemedlikethetimesmyRDMwasstompinghisfootthehardestaboutgettingtoworkweretheexactmomentsthemonkeywouldfeelthemostspiritedaboutputtingontheheadphonesandbecominglostforhoursinthepiano.
Whencollegeended,thrilledtobedoneforeverwithformaleducation,whichwasclearlynotmything,Iburstoutintotheworldwith1,000ambitionstodo1,000things.Justwaittilltheworldsawme.Ihadeverythingimaginabletoofferexceptknowledge,skills,andworkethic.
MyRDMhaddonealotofthinkingaboutthis,andheunderstoodthatthemonkeyhadspentcollegetryingtotellhimsomethingimportantIwantedtobeacomposer.ThatwasclearlythethingIwasmostdrawnto,andfinally,itwouldbecomethethingIwassupposedtodoeachday.Nomorefightingthemonkeyhewasgoingtogetexactlywhathewanted.Ihadfiguredoutlife,andImovedtoLAtowritemoviescores.
Inordertopaymybills,IbegantutoringkidsafterschoolontheirhomeworkorfortheSAT,asidejobIchosebecauseitwouldntdistractmefrombecomingthenextJohnWilliams.Itwastheperfectsetup,Iwasbrimmingwithexcitementaboutmusic,andthingswerestartingtomovewhentheweirdestthinghappened.JustwhenIwassureIhadfoundmyself,themonkeybegansoulsearching.WhentheRDMandIwouldsitdownatthepianotowritesomethingtheexactactivitythemonkeyspentcollegeobsessedwiththemonkeywouldthrowafitandrefusetojoinus.TheRDMbegantofeelhelpless,thesamewayhedidincollege.
Meanwhile,themonkeyhadfoundanewinteresthehadbecomefixatedwithmysidejob.Tutoringwasgoingwell,referralswereincreasing,andwhiletheRDMwouldinsistthatwewerealreadyworkingwithtoomanystudents,themonkeywouldaccepteverynewjobthatcameourway.Soon,themonkeystartedthinkingbigger,andwithoutrunningitbytherestofus,hebeganhiringmyfriendstotutorforme.TheRDMwouldwakeupeagertodiveintocomposing,butthewholedaywouldendupbeingspentonphonecallsandburiedinspreadsheets.Themonkeyhadstartedabusiness.
MybrainandIendedupinanunpleasantno-mansland.Themonkeyrefusedtoletuspourourselvesintoourmusiccareer,andtheRDMrefusedtoembracethemonkeysnewbusinesscareer.Iwasdoingalotofthingsandnotgivingmyalltoanyofthem.
ItwasaroundthenthatmybestfriendAndrewmovedtoLA.Andrewisntlikeme.Helivesandbreathesbusiness,withnointerestinpursuinganythinginthearts,andeversinceImethimwhenwewerefive,hismonkeyhasbeenatamelittlebitchwhodoeswhathestold.Afterhemoved,westartedtalkingaboutmaybegoingintobusinesstogethersomehow.MyRDMhadrefusedtoentertaintakingbusinessseriouslyuntilthen,buttheprospectofstartingacompanywithAndrewandactuallyputtingafulleffortintoitwasenticingandthemonkeywasclearlyintoit,somaybethiswasthethingIwassupposedtobedoingallalong.Idecidedtodivein,andbuildingoffofwhatIhadstarted,wefoundedanewtutoringcompanytogether.
TheRDMstillwrestledwiththedecisiontoputapauseonthemusicsideofthings,butthecompanywasgrowingquickly,beinginbusinesswithAndrewwasagreattimelikeplayingacomplexstrategygamewithyourfriendandtheRDMfinallystartedtofeelokayaboutbecomingtotallywrappedupinbusiness.
Whichwasthemonkeyscuetobecomeanavidblogger.
Ihadbeencasuallybloggingforafewyearsatthatpoint,butbusinesstakingoffwasjustwhatthemonkeyneededtokickhisnewwritinghobbyintofullgear,andoverthenextfewyears,Iwrotehundredsofblogpostsinmyoffhours.Iwentintoworkeveryday,andIdbeengagedwhileIwastherebutinsteadofdoingwhatanentrepreneurissupposedtodooutsideofworkandkeepthewheelsturning,mullingoverthestrategyandallowingthesubconscioustodropkeyepiphaniesonyoufromtimetotime,Idbethinkingaboutwhattoblogaboutnext.
In2013,whenAndrewandIdecidedtostartsomethingnew,welookedatmymonkey,sawhowabsorbedhealwayswaswithhisblog,andthoughtmaybethatwasthethingIwassupposedtobedoingthiswholetimesowestartedWaitButWhy.Andrewwouldcontinuetogrowourcompany
whileIdfullyimmersemyselfinthisnewproject,givingthemonkeyexactlywhathesobadlywanted.
___________
WhatwasclassicprocrastinationincollegemorphedintoabizarreformofinsanityonceIenteredtherealworld.Onaday-to-day,microlevel,therewasstillalwaysanelementofthenormalRDMtriestodosomething,monkeymakesitdifficultthing,butinabroader,macrosense,itwasalmostasifIwerechasingthemonkey.Afterhedefeatedmesosoundlyincollege,Iwonderediffightingagainsthiminthefirstplacewasmymistake.Hesbornfromsomeinner,primalpartofme,sowouldntitmakesensetopayattentiontohisinclinationsandusethemasmyguide?
SothatswhatItriedtodowhenhedbecontinuallydrawntosomething,Ideventuallytakehisleadandbuildmylifearoundthat.Buttheproblemwas,hewasalmostlikeamirageonceIdgettowherehewas,hewouldntbethereanymore.Hedbesomewhereelse.Thiswasconfusingwashetherebeforebecauseheactuallywantedtobe,orwashejusttherebecauseitwaswheretheRDMwasnot?Didheactuallyhavepassionsofhisown,orwashejustsomeelusiveevilcontrarianinsideofmewithamissiontoholdmebackfromeverdoinganythinggreatwithmytalentsandenergies?
Lastyear,IcameacrossalittlediagramthatIthinkholdsthekeytothesequestions.ItscalledtheEisenhowerMatrix:
TheEisenhowerMatrixplacesanythingyoucouldspendyourtimedoingontwospectrums:onegoingfromthemosturgentpossibletasktotheleasturgent,theothergoingfromcriticallyimportanttototallyinconsequentialandusingtheseasaxes,dividesyourworldintofourquadrants.
ThematrixwaspopularizedinStephenCoveysfamousbook,TheSevenHabitsofHighlyEffectivePeopleandisnamedafterPresidentDwightEisenhower.Eisenhowerwaswell-knownforbeingtremendouslyproductive,whichCoveycreditstohisfirstthingsfirstattitudeonhowtospendyourtime.AndtoEisenhower,thefirstthingswerealwaystheimportantones.HebelievedyoushouldspendnearlyallofyourtimeinQuadrants1and2,andheaccomplishedthiswithasimpleD-wordforeachquadrant:
AndthatsfantasticforDwightfuckingEisenhower.ButyouknowwhatDwightclearlydidnthaveinhisbaldhead?Anall-powerfulInstantGratificationMonkey.Ifhehad,hedknowthataprocrastinatorsmatrixlookslikethis:
IfyoueverwantanyinformationonQuadrant4directions,placestoeat,etc.justaskaprocrastinator.Theylivethere.Foranon-procrastinator,Q4isahappyplacetospendtime.Afteraproductivedayworkingonimportanttasks,itfeelsgreattokickbackinQ4andunderthosecircumstances,theresanameforQ4:TheHappyPlayground.ButprocrastinatorsdonttendtohangoutinQ4afteranefficientdayofhigh-levelworktheyretherefarmoreoftenthanthat,againsttheirwill,becausethemonkeyhasdraggedthemthere,allwhiletheRationalDecision-Makerisbeggingthemtoleave.AndtheyhaveadifferentnameforQ4:TheDarkPlayground.
AsforQuadrants1and3theurgentquadrantsmostprocrastinatorswillenduptherefromtimetotime,usuallyinafullsweat,withthePanicMonsternexttotheirfacescreaming.Q1andQ3keeptheprocrastinatoroffthestreets.
AndthentheresQuadrant2.Toaprocrastinator,Quadrant2isastrangeandforeignland,far,faraway.KindoflikeAtlantis,orNarnia.Heknowsitsanimportantplace,andhestriedmanytimestogothere,buttheresabigproblemthemonkeyisrepulsedbyit,andthePanicMonsterisntconcernedwithit.Andthatsthedeadlycombothatdefeatstheprocrastinatoreverytime.
Thereasonthisisdisastrousisthattheroadtotheprocrastinatorsdreamstheroadtoexpandinghishorizons,exploringhistruepotential,andachievingworkhestrulyproudofrunsdirectlythroughQuadrant2.Q1andQ3maybewherepeoplesurvive,butQ2iswherepeoplethrive,grow,andblossom.
Butifyoureaprocrastinator,youreinluck.Youhaveanaceupyoursleevesomeonedaringandfearless,withbountifulenergyanddynamictalent,andsomeonewhocandefeatthemonkeylikesteppingonanant:FutureYou.
FutureYouisaprocrastinatorsmostimportantallysomeonewhosalwaysthereandalwayshasyourback,nomatterwhat.Iknowallaboutthisfirsthand.FutureTimisanamazingguy.
WhenmyalarmgoesoffandIdontwanttowakeup,Ijustpressthesnoozebutton,whichdolesoutthejobofgettingoutofbedtoFutureTiminstead.Myto-dolisthastwopartsashort,easyoneforme,andalongone,fullofallthethingsIcantimagineeverdoing,becausetheyresoicky-seeming.FutureTimalwayshandlesthatone,withoutacomplaint.FutureTimalsohasnoproblemwitheventhevilestofsocialobligations.Iwasrecentlyinvitedtoattendafeedback-givingsessionforathree-hour-longplaywrittenbysomeoneIbarelyknowIcertainlyhadnointentionofeverdoingthat,butIwouldalsohavefeltguiltyjustsayingno,soIexplainedthatIhaveabusycouplemonths,butthatIdbemorethanhappytojoinwhenithappensagainthissummer,atimewhenitllbeFutureTimsproblem,notmine.
FutureTimalsohasadisciplineandbalancetohislifestyleIcouldonlyeverdreamof.IveneverbeenmuchofanexerciserbutFutureTimbelongstoagymanddoesallthejoggingforbothofus,andIlovehowintocookinghealthymealsFutureTimis,becauseIpersonallydonthavethetime.FutureTimisthekindofguyweallwanttobelikeIsuggestgettingtoknowhimyourself,whichyoucandobybuyinghisbooks,sincehesaprolificauthor.
ButthemostimportantroleFutureTimplaysinmylifebringsusbacktotheEisenhowerMatrix.Inaconvenientstrokeoffate,FutureTimhappenstospendalmostallofhistimeintheoneplaceIcanneverseemtogettomyself:theall-importantQuadrant2.FutureTimisQuadrant2swarden,andwhenImakealistofimportantto-doitemsandnoticethatmostofthemseemtolandinQ2,Idonthavetodespair,becauseIknowFutureTimisontopofthem.Whichisgood,consideringhowdireasituationPastTim,thatuselessfuck,hasoftenleftmein:
ButforallofFutureTimsvirtues,hehasonefatalflawthatkindofruinseverything:hedoesntexist.
ItturnsoutthatFutureYouisasmuchofamirageasthemonkeyspassionforahobby.IbankedonFutureTimsreal-worldexistenceformymostimportantplans,buteverytimeIdfinallyarriveatatimewhenIthoughtIwouldfindFutureTim,hewasnowheretobefoundtheonlypersontherewouldbestupidPresentTim.ThatsthethingthatreallysucksaboutFutureYouwhenevertimefinallygetstohim,hesnotFutureYouanymore,hesPresentYou,andPresentYoucantdothetasksyouassignedtoFutureYoubecausethosetaskscanonlybedonebysomeonewithoutamonkey.Youassignedthem
toFutureYouinthefirstplacebecausehedoesnthaveamonkeythatwasthewholepoint.Soyoudowhatyoualwaysdoyoure-delegatethemtoFutureYou,hopingthatnexttimetimecatchesupwithFutureYou,heactuallyexists.
Thisiswhatleftmeunable,foryears,togivelifemyfulleffort.TheimportantworktobedoneusuallylivesinQ2,aplaceIhadahardtimegoingto,soIddirecttheextraenergytoapassionatehobbyinstead.Themonkeywouldgetsuperintothesehobbies,becausehobbiesare,bydefinition,inQ4aplacethemonkeylovestobe.
SohereswhatwentonwhenIwassupposedtobepursuingacomposingcareer:
AndwhenIdecidedtofollowthemonkeysleadandtakeonbusiness,Iwasmissingthekeypoint:takingonbusinessmeantmakingbusinessthethingIwassupposedtodo,whichturneditfromanotimportanttaskintoanimportantonemovingbusinessfromQ4,themonkeysfavoriteplace,toQ2,hisleastfavoriteplace.
ThefactthatIexpectedthemonkeytoremainobsessedwithbusinessaftertheswitchtoQ2showshowlittleIunderstoodthemonkey.Themonkeyspassionneverwasmusic,orbusiness,orbloggingthemonkeyspassionwasalwaysQ4.
AndthethingthemonkeyreallylikesaboutQ4isntanythingaboutQ4inparticularitsthatQuadrant4isntQuadrant1or2.Themonkey,whosecoredriveistodowhateverseasiest,cantstandtheimportantquadrants,becausetheimportantquadrantsarewherethepressuresonitswheretheressomethingtoprove,whereyouractionshaveconsequences,wherethestakesarehigh,andwhereyoureshootingforthestars,whichmeansyoumightfailtoreachthem.Nofuckingthanks,saysthemonkey.Writing300blogpostswhileIwassupposedtobedreamingupbrilliantbusinessgrowthstrategieswasnteasyinthesensethatIdidnthavetoworkhardtowritethemitwaseasyinthattherewasnothingatstake.Stakesarereallywhatshardforahuman.
___________
WhenIstartedwritingpostsforWaitButWhy,IknewIwantedtowriteaboutprocrastination.Ineededtotrytoarticulatethemadnessthatwentoninmyhead.AfterassigningthatdauntingmissiontoFutureTimforawhile,Ifinallybitthebulletanddidit.
Thereactionwasoverwhelming.Inadditiontotheover1,300commentsonthetwoposts,heresthebreakdownofemailsIvereceivedfromreaders:
Therehavebeenthousandsofemails.Apparentlythiswholethingisntjustme.
Andtheemailsarentquick,HeyIlikedtheprocrastinationpostsbyenotestheyrethorough.Andheartfelt.Agoodnumberofthemmentionthatthepostsmadethemcry.Andtheyrenotcryingbecausetheyweremovedbymyshittystickdrawingstheyrecryingbecausetheywerereadingaboutoneofthebiggestproblemsintheirlives.
Theprofilesofthosewhohaveemailedrangewildly,coveringallages,allkindsofprofessions,andhailingfromalmosteverycountryintheworld.Iveheardfroma13-year-oldinPakistan,amiddle-agedprofessorinArgentina,an80-year-oldretirednurseinMississippi;aGermangraphicdesigner,anAustralianauthor,aGhanaianfilmmaker,aKoreanentrepreneur.AndthePhDstudentsthehordesofPhDstudentsdoingtheultimateQ2task.
Inoneway,thesepeopleallhavethesameexactproblem,andthesameproblemIhaveanInstantGratificationMonkeytheycantcontrol.ButIvenoticed,afterreadingeveryoneoftheirstories,thattheextenttowhichthisproblemisruiningtheirlivesvariesdrastically,dependingonafewkeyfactsabouttheirparticularcircumstances.Thisdistinctionplacesthereaderswhohaveemailedintothreecategories:
1)TheDisastinators
Ofallprocrastinatorsoutthere,theDisastinatorsareintheworstshape.ADisastinatorispermanentlycampedoutinQuadrant4,andprocrastinationiscompletelydestroyingtheirlife.AprocrastinatorusuallybecomesaDisastinatorforoneoftworeasons:
A)TheirmonkeyhasstoppedbeingscaredofthePanicMonsterandhasbecomeall-powerful
B)Theyreanormalprocrastinatorbuttheyreinalifesituationwithnoexternaldeadlinesorpressure
SituationAissuper-dark,andasIvelearnedfromreaderemails,notthatuncommon.Thesepeoplehavelosttheabilitytodoalmostanythingthatmatterstothemandareeitherinadownwardspiralorhavegivenupentirely.
InSituationB,theDisastinatorisntaworseprocrastinatorthananyother,itsjustthattheircircumstancesareacatastrophicmatchfortheirpersonality.ThenatureoftheirlifeandworkgivesthePanicMonsternoreasontowakeupatall,andunfortunately,themonkeyisntscaredoftheSelf-LoathingMonster.
TheoutcomeisthattheDisastinatorgetsnothingdone,ever.ManyofthePhDcandidateswhoemailedmefallintothiscategory.
2)TheImpostinators
WehaventtalkedmuchaboutQuadrant3,butitmightbethemostdangerousquadrantofall,anditswheretheImpostinatorreignsking.TheImpostinatorslifelookslikethis:
TheImpostinatorseemsproductive,butshesreallyanimposteraprocrastinatorwearingaproductivepersonmask.ByspendingallofherworktimeinQ3,sheseemsbusysheisbusybutsheneverseemstomakemuchprogressonherrealgoals.
Impostinatorshaveclevermonkeys,andQ3isthemonkeysmostclevertrick.ThemonkeyknowsthattheRDM,whocanbegullible,canbeappeasedifhespendsampletimeoutoftheQ4DarkPlayground.SotheImpostinatorsmonkeycreatesabattlethatgoesbackandforthbetweenQ4andQ3,andthatworksbecauseQ3feelsproductivetotheImpostinator.ItreliesononemajordelusionoftheImpostinatorthatbusy=productive.
SoanImpostinatorwillspendthewholedayansweringemails,runningerrands,makingphonecalls,organizinglistsandschedules,participatinginmeetings,etc.andifshesjudgingherselfbytimespentoutoftheDarkPlayground,shesasmashingsuccess.Butattheendoftheday,thesatisfactionshefeelshasahintofemptinesstoit,andtheHappyPlaygroundisneverquitefullyhappy.Shemayhavedeludedherselfintothinkingsheslivingaproductivelife,butinhersubconscious,sheknowsshesnotdoingwhatshessupposedtobedoing.Herfeelingsofaccomplishmentcomealongwithanundercurrentofdespair.
Inreality,sheslivinginagrand,overarchingprocrastination,brilliantlycraftedbyhermonkey.Ratherthantrytowinthetug-of-warbetweendoingwhatmattersthestuffupinQ2andtheDarkPlayground,theImpostinatorsmonkeytrickstheRDMintofightingonthewrongbattlefield,andheletstheRDMbeathimonthisbattlefield,whichleadshertobelieveshesdoingagoodjob.
TheotherdifficultytheImpostinatorfacesisthatsometimesQ3disguisesitselfasQ1.AbusyImpostinatoroftenbelievesthattheurgentworkshesconsumedwithisimportant,buttheproblemwiththatiswhatEisenhowerhimselfsaidbest:
Whatisimportantisseldomurgent,andwhatisurgentisseldomimportant.
Inotherwords,Quadrant1oftendoesnotexist.Thisisntalwaysthecase,butitsespeciallylikelytobetrueforpeoplewhohaveyettogettheircareerrolling,becauseusuallywhenyourtrulyimportantworkisalsourgent,itmeansyouhavesomethinggoodgoingon.Thiscreatesacatch-22,wherethepeoplewhomostneedurgencyinordertodothingsprocrastinatorsearlyintheircareerareoftenthosewithatotallyvacantQuadrant1.
Themoretimegoeson,themoreIthinkthatbeingsuperbusytendstomeanhavingapackedQ3(usuallymixedinwithtoomuchQ4time).IknowthatwhenIminoneofthosezoneswhereImtellingeveryonehowbusyIamandhowlittletimeIhaveforthem,itsalmostalwaysbecauseImoverloadedwithQ3bullshit.Peoplewhoarereallyontopoftheirlifereallyincontroltendtohaveplentyofspaceintheirschedules.Butsocietysmilesuponbusypeople,thephraseIthinkyouhavetoomuchtimeonyourhandsisaninsult,andthatleavesImpostinatorslookingandoftenfeelingliketheyredoingitright.AndwhiletheImpostinatorwillalwaysfeelsuperiortotheDisastinator,the
truthisthatintermsofrealproductivityonthingsthatmatter,theyreequal.
ThemajorlessonhereistobewareofQuadrant3.Q3grabsyoubythecollarandthrustsyouontoatreadmillofreactingtothings.Itsnotaplaceofselfcontrol.Andifyourenotcareful,Q3willsuckyourlifeaway.Iknow,becauseIvespentalotofmylifeasanImpostinator.
OfthemanyImpostinatorswhoemailedme,themostcommonprofessionswereartistsofsomekindorentrepreneurs.Inbothofthosesituations,yourethebossofyourownlife,andtheimportantworktodoimprovingyourskills,deepeningyournetwork,executingacreativevisionisrarelyurgent.
3)TheSuccesstinators
Afterspendingmostofmylifefeelingunabletomaximizemyself,sincestartingWaitButWhyayearandahalfago,Ivewrittenover250,000wordstheequivalentof1,000bookpagesandwhatImdoingreallymatterstome.Forthefirsttime,thesatisfactionofaccomplishmentdoesntcomealongwithatwingeofguiltoremptinessordespair.Ivedoneit!Imadoer.
Notquite.
Therealityis,IhaventovercomemymonkeyproblemsoneouncemorethantheImpostinatorsandDisastinaterswhoemailedmethebigdifferenceis,IvegottenmyselfintoasituationwhereIhaveabig,fatQuadrant1inmylife.NotafakeQ1thatsreallyQ3indisguisebutagenuineQ1,anditspacked.Theintimaterelationshipabloghaswithreal,livingpeopleandthepressurethatgeneratesturnsabloggersimportantworkintourgentwork,assoonasthereareenoughreadersthatthePanicMonstertakesinterestinthings.
Foraprocrastinator,thisistheoppositeofthePhD-typesituation,whichIdescribedasacatastrophicmatchforaprocrasinator.Writingregularlywithanimmediateaudienceisanexampleofaterrificmatchforaprocrastinatorspersonality,becauseitputshisPanicMonsterintheoptimallocationitalignsthePanicMonsterwithhismostimportantendeavor.
Ofcourse,mymonkeyisstillwreakinghavocovermywholelifeinanywayhecanIpulledalifespan-reducingall-nightertofinishthispost.Buttheresakeydistinctionbetweenwhathesdoingnowandwhathewasdoingduringmypreviousprojects.Withthoseotherprojects,hespenthisQ4timepursuingreal,ambitiousprojectsandhewasallowedtodothatbecausetheRDMwasntentirelysurewhathewanted,andhewouldquestionwhetherthemonkeywasactuallyontosomethingwithhisdistractions.Butatleastsofar,workingonWaitButWhyishittingthenailontheheadfortheRDM,becausehesactuallyspendingalotoftimeabovetheimportantline,sohehasaconvictionabouttheundertakinghedidntpreviously.Becauseofthis,hellletthemonkeytapdancearoundQ4andQ3,mainlybecausehehasnopowernotto,buthewontallowthemonkeytotakeonanythingseriouswithhistime.
Ihavenotconqueredprocrastination,butforthetimebeing,atleast,ImintheleastbadtypeofprocrastinatorsituationImaSuccesstinator.
Asuccesstinatorhasfoundasolution-ishtohisproblems,butitsnotpretty,oftennothealthy,andusuallynotsustainable.Itsacleverduct-tapingofatroubledmachinetoholditovertemporarily.
IreceivedalotofemailsfromSuccesstinators,andthepatternswereconsistentandresonatewithmyowncurrentsituation.ASuccesstinatorcanbehappywithhislife,butisntusuallythathappyinhislife.AndthatsbecausebeingaSuccesstinatordoesnotmakeyouasuccess.Someonewhodoessomethingwellprofessionallyattheexpenseofbalance,relationships,andhealthisnotasuccess.RealsuccessmeanshavingbothprofessionallifeandlifestyleworkingwellandinharmonyandSuccesstinatorsaretoostressed,toounavailable,andareoftencompletelydeprivedofHappyPlaygroundtime,whichisacriticalcomponentofahappylife.ASuccesstinatorisalsousuallylimitedinhisprofessionalpossibilitiesgreatworkcanbedoneinQ1,butitsoftenmoreonthemaintainingsideofthings.Q2isstillwheremostoftheprofessionalgrowthandout-of-the-boxthinkingtakesplace,andlikeallprocrastinators,SuccesstinatorsrarelysetfootinQ2.
___________
Therearebiggerproblemsintheworldthanprocrastination.Thingslikepoverty,disease,mentalillness,anddrugaddictionallmakeprocrastinationseemglaringlylikeaproblemoftheprivilegedsomethingtosufferoverforthosewhoseliveshavenorealsuffering.
Butifaskepticspentafewhoursreadingthroughthemoundofprocrastination-relatedemailsIvereceived,Ithinktheydagreethatthisisadireprobleminmany,manylives.Anditdoesntjustharmtheprocrastinatorithurtsthepeopleclosetotheprocrastinator,spreadingtheeffect.
Itsalsotheworldsloss.ForeverySteveJobsorJohnLennonorHillaryClintonorJ.K.Rowlingoranyoneelsewhosetalentshaveenhancedourlives,therearethousandsofpeoplewithjustasmuchpotentialwhoneverachievemuchfortheworldbecausetheywasteawaytheirtimeinthewrongquadrants.
Onewaytolookatthisisthateachhumanlifehasacertainnumberoftimepoints,anditsuptoyouhowyouspendthem.Considerthedifferencebetweensomeonewhospends30hoursaweekinQ2andsomeoneelsewhoonlymanagestwohoursofQ2timeaweek.SinceQ2is,formany,whererealadvancementhappens,overthecourseoftheirlives,the30hourpersonwillaccomplish15timesasmuchinherlifeasthetwohourperson.Andinreality,themultiplierisprobablyevenlargerthan15,sinceprogressbuildsuponprogressandtheratecanaccelerate(i.e.SteveJobswouldnthaveaccomplished1/15thofwhatheaccomplishedifhehadputin1/15ththeproductivehoursheprobablywouldhaveaccomplishednoneofit.)Thedistinctionbetweenanordinarypersonandanextraordinarypersonmightsimplycomedowntothedifferencesinhowtheyallottheirtimepoints.
Clearingawaydelusion
Ifwewanttoimproveourtimepointspending,thefirststepislearningtoseetheworldthroughacrystalclearEisenhowerMatrixwhichmeansshakingoffalldelusion.Weneedtodevelopwell-thought-outdefinitionsofurgentandimportant,whichwillbedifferentforeveryoneandrequiresadeepdigintothehighlypersonalquestion,Whatmattersmosttome?
BrettMcKaydefinesimportanttasksasthingsthatcontributetoourlong-termmission,values,andgoals.Thisisbroadandstraightforwardandagoodcoresentencetocomebacktowhenassessingimportancedowntheroad.
Thethoughtprocessaboutwhatisandisnturgentshouldrevolvearoundtheself-discussionofwhatsmostimportant.Ideally,urgentwouldnotmean,Thethinggrabbingmehardestbythecollaritwouldbedefinedbywhat,oftheimportanttasksonyourlist,wouldbenefitmostfromhappeningsoonerratherthanlater.Usingthisdefinition,spendingtimewithyourkidswouldcertainlyqualifyasurgent,whileunderthetypicaldeadline-relateddefinitionofurgent,itwouldqualifyasnoturgent.Inotherwords,theorderofyourprioritiesismuchbetteroffbeingsetbyyourRDMthanyourPanicMonster.WisdomresidesintheRDM,andwhenthemindlessPanicMonstercallstheshotsonwhatsurgentandwhatsnot,youtaketheRDMswisdomoutofthegame.
Youmayalsowanttogathersomeharddataonhowyourecurrentlyspendingyourtimepoints,byloggingyourhoursforthenextweekandseeingjusthowmanyofthemfallintoeachofthefourquadrants(youllprobablybeunpleasantlysurprisedbytheresults).
Becomingthebossofyourbrain
OnceyoufeelclearonyourEisenhowerMatrixandwhereitsvariousboundarieslie,youllneedtodothehardpartandgaincontroloverhowyouspendyourtimepointswithinit.Which,foraprocrastinator,islifesgreatestchallenge.
Therewardsofgainingcontrolareobvious.Itsincrediblehowmuchapersoncangetdonewhilealsomaintainingabalancedlifestyleiftheyreincontroloftheirtimepointspending.AndthosenotincontrolwilllosemostoftheirtimepointstoQ3andQ4andfeelliketheydonthavetimeforeithertheirworkortheirlifestyle,allwhileaccomplishingverylittle.Timepointallotmentiseverything.
Aprocrastinatorindesperatestraitscantakeahalfstepintherightdirectionthroughthebruteforcemethodofrearranginghislifeinawaythatmakeshimasuccesstinator.ThatswhereIamnow,anditsahellofalotbetterthanwhereIwasbefore.
Butthatslikehiringabodyguardinsteadoflearninghowtofight.Therealgoalofaprocrastinatormustbetofigureouthowtobecomethebossofhisbrain.AprocrastinatorsrealityisthathisinnerselfhisRationalDecision-Makeristhegrandmasterofhislifeintheory,butinpractice,onlyaspectator.TheprocrastinatorsRDMgoes,helplessly,wherethewavestakehim,shuffledfromactivitytoactivitybytheprimalforcesofthemonkeyandthePanicMonster.UntilaprocrastinatorsRDMcanwalk,onhisown,fromQ4toQ2,wheneverhewantsto,hesnotfixed.
___________
IfyouGooglehowtostopprocrastinating,youllfindabout1,000articles,allofferingterrificadviceonhowtodoit.Theproblemisthatthearticlesarealwayswrittenforsanepeople,andprocrastinatorsarentsanepeople.Beinginsane,procrastinatorsarealwaysunderthedelusionthattheyresane,sotheyreadanadvicearticleandthinktheyllbeabletoapplyittotheirlife.Butthenitdoesntworkoutthatway.
Beforeaprocrastinatorcanactongoodadvice,heneedstohavecontrol.Aracecardrivercangetallthecoachingintheworld,butif,whentheracestarts,someoneelseiscontrollingthesteeringwheelandthepedals,allthecoachingisuseless.
Thatswhytheonlywayaprocrastinatorcantakethewheelinhishandsisifhisself-fulfillingprophecyhisstorylinesaysthathecan.Andstorylinesonlychangewithreal-worldaction.Quitethechickenandeggissue.
Atitsdeepestlevel,itcomesdowntoabattleofconfidence.TheRDMandmonkeyeachhavetheirownideaofhowtospendyourtimepoints,andwhicheverofthemismoreconfidentwhoeverhasastrongerbeliefthattheyrethealphadogintherelationshipendsupprevailing.Thedifferencebetweenaprocrastinatorandanon-procrastinatorissimplythattheprocrastinatorsmonkeyandRDM
bothbelievethatthemonkeyisthealphadog,andthenon-procrastinatorspairbothbelievethattheRDMistheboss.
Butasfirmlyentrenchedastheseconfidencelevelsmayfeel,themonkeyandtheRDMshareasinglepoolofconfidencewithafixedsumwhenonesconfidencegoesup,theothersgoesdownandthebalancecanbegintobetippedbythesmallestchanges,takingyourstorylinewithit.
Figuringoutthestartingpointofthischickenandeggparadoxiseachprocrastinatorspersonalquest.Butauniversalstartingpointistotrytoremainawareasmuchaspossible.Awareofwhatsimportant,awareofwhatsurgent,andmostimportantlyawareofthemonkey.Themonkeyisnotyourfriend,andheneverwillbe.Buthesalsopartofyourheadandimpossibletogetridof,sogetinthehabitofnoticinghim.Whenyouwakeupinthemorning,hellbethere.Whenyousitdowntowork,hellbethere.Wheneveryoumostbadlyneedallthegutsandgrityoucanmuster,hellbetheretotakeyourgutsandgritaway.
Buthethrivesoffofunconsciousness.Simplybynoticinghimandsayingtoyourself,Yup,theresthemonkey,rightoncue,youcanstarttotipthebalanceoutofitsdefaultstate.Thenmaybeoneday,youllfindyourselfnonchalantlyshovingthemonkeyoffofthewheelwiththesimplest,Nomonkey,notnow.Andyourlifewillbeforeverchanged.
___________
IlovetheemailsIvereceivedaboutprocrastination,andIhopetheycontinue.ButIalwayswishthepeoplewhohaveemailedmecouldheareachothersstories.Iencourageanyonewhofeelslikesharingtheirstorytodosointhecomments.
Ifthispostwasupyouralley,alsocheckout:
WaitButWhystwoearlierpostsonprocrastinationPart1,Part2.
LifeisjusttodayoverandoverandoveragainLifeisaPicture,ButYouLiveinaPixel
Aone-imageremindertospendyourtimepointswiselyYourLifeinWeeks
AdeeperlookatwhatgoesoninourbrainsandwhyawarenessissocriticalAReligionfortheNon-Religious
AlookatadifferentanimalstrugglegoingoninadifferentpartofthebrainTamingtheMammoth:WhyYouShouldStopCaringWhatOtherPeopleThink
Andwhiletheyreruiningyourlife,youmightaswellcuddlewiththem:
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FilipeJorgeEnglishTeacheratRedBalloonCursodeInglsDearTim,pleasestopreadingmymindanddescribingexactlyhowmybrainworks.Thisisgettingspooky.Yoursfaithfully,ReplyLike March24at5:24pm48
ColinBlackDublin,IrelandifwestayedinQ2,we'dliveonPlanitEarth!Getit?yeah?anyone?......please....no........okReplyLike March24at2:52pm37
ColinBlackDublin,IrelandSorry,idrankabeerwhilstreadingwaitbutwhy,myguiltyweekly(orwheneverTimfeelslikeit)Q4pleasure.Imustadmit,IhaveneverfeltoverwhelmedbythemonkeyforsureIhaveone,butmymonkeystaysinacageuntilI'mintheHappyPlaygroundandthenhegoesnuts.SomehowI'vemanagedtoteachthemonkeythatthesatisfactionbeyondtheDarkWoodsisfargreaterthanthegratificationoftheDarkPlayground.It'sallaboutgoals,targetsanddesignatingQ4time.Thiscanbedoneonforayear,brokendownintoamonth,thenintoaweek,thenintoaday.Forexample,asananaesthesiologist,theworkingdayisQ1withQ3tryingtointervenebutignored,therestofthedayisQ2planningresearch,studying,exercisingandALWAYSALWAYS,from9pmeverynightisQ4.ItiscrucialtohavedailyQ4.GreatpostTimasalwaysReplyLike March24at3:02pm9
EdwardLeahy TopCommenterAnesthesiologistatU.S.DepartmentofVeteransAffairsAsafellowanesthesiologist,Iagree.Itrytotake1Q4dayaweektoo.ReplyLike March25at7:06am3
AdrianaWheatleyColinBlackAllIcansayisyouluckybugger!ReplyLikeApril2at2:29pm
BethAndersonTheArtInstituteofSeattleOhboy,thiscouldhavebeenwrittenaboutME.It'sbothscaryandexhilaratingtoread.EventhoughIamdraggedthroughuseless,pointlessbrainrottingnonsenseonadailybasisbymonkey,atleastyouhaveidentifiedhiminaquantifiablewaytomenow.Monkey,Iknowyou'retherenow.Youaremine.ReplyLike March24at12:17pm9
OwenChen TopCommenterVancouverFilmSchoolThisisincredible.IfirststartedfollowingtheblogwhenIreadaboutthefermi'sparadox.Andhavereadmostofthemsince.
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paradox.Andhavereadmostofthemsince.
Whilethefermi'sparadoxandthepostaboutAIaresimplymindopening,theprocrastinationoneandmammothoneresonatedwithmethemost.Pleasekeepdoingwhatyouaredoing.Itrulydohopeyouovercomeyourmonkeyoneday,andsamewishgoesformyself.Iboughttwoofthemonkeyplushtosupportyoureffortandthisamazingblog.Pleasekeepupthegreatwork.ReplyLike March25at11:20pm7
NickHughesOwneratWellBeingMassage&SkinCareTheironyisthatI'vespenthalfadayreadingthispostabouthowtostopprocrastinating.Nowwhat?HaveaflipthroughFacebook,Iguess.ReplyLike March25at2:57pm7
EricaRobinsonWorksatCostcoI'mdefinitelyonthedisastinatorendofthespectrum.Mymonkeydoesn'trunfromthepanicmonsteratallandactuallygainsstrengthwhenI'mstressedout,andthat'sjustthewayitis.Ifthepanicmonstercomesouttoplay,I'vealreadylost.After10yearsoftryingtofigureposthighschoolshitoutandjustgetmyBachelor'sdegreealreadysoIcanstartmyREALlife,Iamfinallylikelytograduatewithinayear.Dr.KellyMcGonigal's"WillpowerInstinct"book(andforawhilesomedrugsandtherapy)reallyhelpedmefigureouthowtoexertsomemeasureofcontrolandstartgainingconfidencetotackleissuesinatimelymannerinsteadoflettingproblemsfesterintosomethinginsurmountable.It'sbeenslow,butbyfocusingmyVERYlimitedwillpowerintoactivitiesthatgeneratemorewillpower(exercise,meditation,s...SeeMoreReplyLike March26at6:08pm5
RTBeanOhhi,yourlifesoundslikemine.Iwilldefinitelylookupthatbook(andreaditwhileI'mtoostressedtojustdomydamnhomeworkalready).ReplyLikeApril15at12:26pm
JanetMontgomerySmithfieldSelmaHighSchoolIhatetosay"ditto,"butthisisreallysomearticle.Hatsofftoyouforelucidatingmyprobleminsuchagenerous,nonjudgmentalway.iamnotalone.Loveallthecommentsaswell!ReplyLike March24at3:05pm5
LeeCeeTim,notreallyinthehabitofwritinginternetpostcomments,butthankyouforputtingthisseriesofpostsonprocrastinationtogether.Findingmywayintodoingwhat'simportant(andfiguringoutwhatthatactuallyis)hasbeenaproblemformeforalongtime.ToanextentIfeellikeI'veactuallyresignedmyselftothemonkey,butthiswayofconceptualizingtheproblemgivesmerenewedmotivationtogetseriousabouttamingit.TheDarkPlayground...that'sagreatdescriptionofthatselfloatingpurgatorywherenorealfunactuallytakesplace.ThequadrantisalsoaveryusefulconceptI'mcertainlyanImposstinator,andyes,myFutureSelfisawesomeanddoingallkindsofcoolshit.So,thanksagain.
Bytheway,thispostremindedmealotofthisposterwhichisavisualmeditationinstruction:"Inthepainting,thepractitionerisrepresentedbyamonk,effortisrepresentedbyfire,andthemindisanelephant.Asthemonkembarksalongthepath,firstheischasingtheelephant,whichisallblack(representinglethargy)andisbeingterrorizedbyamonkey(representingdistraction)."
http://www.tricycle.com/blog/buddhabuzzmonkelephantandmonkeyReplyLike March24at12:37pm4
JessBonsell TopCommenterGISGraphicsOfficeratDepartmentofStateDevelopmentOhmygod,theeverelusiveQuadrant2.Here'sanexamplefrommyownlife.Ibuiltmyownhouseandhavebeenlivingthereforover9monthsnow.Istilldon'thavea'screendoor'atthefrontorattheback.Mydadisalwaysremindingme,"getascreendoor".ButI'malwaysthinking,"that'sFutureJess'sproblem,shecandealwithit".Andnothingevergetsdone.Noscreendoormakingbusinessgetsaphonecall.MybackgardenisalsostilladisasterIneedtopulloutalltheweeds."I'llleavethattoFutureJess.FutureJessismotivatedandlovespullingoutweedsonasunnyday".Andforgethouseholdchores.Myhouse(usuallykitchen/bedroom)getsmessytoapointwhereIsay"ohshit,Ican'tlivelikethis"andthemonkeyiskickedtotheside(kindof)andIcleanandfeelaccomplished.Butreally,I'veonlyticke...SeeMoreReplyLike March28at12:42am2
EladPelegMaccabimReutMorHighSchoolYourpostsarealwaysspotonbutthisone...WOW.Yourabilitytoknowmybrainbetterthenmyselfandpreciselyarticulatemylifeisterrifyingandaweinspiringatthesametime.
Likemanyothershere,IgottoknowyourblogthroughthefamousFermiParadoxpostandsincethenreadalmostallofWBW."Mindblowing"willbeaseriousunderstatementforwhatI'mexperiencingregularlywhenbrowsingthiswebsite.Thankyousomuch...
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vellyr 15hoursagoIwouldproposeafourthcategoryofprocrastinator,therelaxtinator.I'vedefeatedthemonkeybysimplyremovingallurgencyfrommylife.IstillhaveQ1thingsoccasionally,butthey'reneververydifficult.Asaresult,Ispendmostofmytimeinquadrants2and4.Thedownsideisthatmyship(asdrivenbytheRDM)isn'treallygoinganywhere.Withouturgencythereisnoopportunitytofailorsucceed.I'mpersonallyOKwiththis,butaccordingtothe"socialladder"paradigm,I'mfailing.
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RavindBudhiraja 12daysagoIthinkyoudidn'tspendenoughtimeconsideringthemostimportantinsightofthearticle,thatthemonkeyavoidsQ1andQ1because"thestakesarehigh,andyoureshootingforthestars,whichmeansyoumightfailtoreachthem."Ifprocrastinationisasymptomofourfearoffailing,shouldn'twetrytoaddresstherootcauseandstopfearingfailure?
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NathanCutrell 14daysagoIfeellikeusprocrastinatorsareanexampleofjustnotfittingintothissocietalstructure.Noteveryonelivesasuccessfullifeinthisnewdynamicof'normallife'.WewouldprobablybePERFECTforthe'hunter/gatherer'era,reallythehuntersideofit.ThethingaboutbeingaprocrastinatoristhatifIactuallydogetfocusedonsomething,andenjoyit,Iwillliterallydoitforhoursonhoursandloveeverysecondofit.Whenyoubreakdownthequadrantsintolifesustainingissueslikehunting,lookingforwaterandfindingshelter,wewouldn'tbesittingaroundprocrastinatinginQ4then.Wearereallywiredtofocusonsomethingandusethe'panicmonster'tohelpus.Heisactuallyonoursidetoo,insomecases.Thatfearanddrivemakesusalertandoriented.Weusedtoliveinaconstantstateoffearorpanic,butnotinabadway.Justina,ifIdon'tfindfoodandwatertodayImightdie,kindawaylol.Thoughts?
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nijikawa 6daysago>NathanCutrellIfindthiscommentinterestingbecausewhenItriedtoimaginethe"hunter"eraNathandescribes,itseemedtomethatQ2isalmostnonexistentinit.ItiredtothinkofthingsthatcouldbelonginQ2inthisera,suchasbecomingmoreattractive(henceincreasingyourchanceofmatingandhavingoffsprings)orbecomingmorephysicallyfit(henceincreasingyourchanceofsurvivalinthewilds),andrealizedthatmostofthemcaninfactbeaccomplishedsimplybydoingQ1andQ3tasks,suchashuntingandfightingagainstopposingclans.Sohowisthemoderneradifferentfromthehunterera?ThinkofMaslow'shierarchyofneeds.Modernhumansdon'treallylackanythingancienthumansownmodernhumansjustgottaworryalotmoreaboutthetoptwolevelsofthepyramid:esteemandselfactualization,whicharehighlyrelatedtoQ2activities.Also,thereareway,waymoretimeandmeansforamodernhumantostayinQ4.Judgingfromthesefact,Ithinkagoodwaytocombatprocrastinationistolearntobethankfulofthethingswehave.Doingsodoesnotgetridofthemonkeyinanyway,butitcouldmakeQ2lookmoreattractiveandmakethemonkeylesslikelytogotoQ4.
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Anonymous 6daysago
seemore
>NathanCutrell
It'saninterestingcomment.Procrastination,putinhuntergatherer'slife.Earlymanmayhaveusedthepanicmonstertosurvive.Butoursurvivalisn'tamatterofavoidingbecomingpartofthefoodchainasmuchasitis'beingconsumedbyatrivialexistence'.I'drunfromthat.
Trythis:Trythinkingofyourlifeinthese4quadrants,instead**.Tome,itmakesmoresensethanEisenhower'sdivisions.Thinkofthestuffyoudoasbelongingtothese4categories:
1)routine
likechoresaroundthehouse,getgasforthecar.groceries.makedinner.mowlawn,gotowork.thingsthatrepeatbuttakeuptimeeverydayandmustbedone.
2)importantlittlethings
differentthingsthatcomeupeverydaygettaxesdone,gotophysical,meetwithlawyer,birthdayparty,takecarinforinspectionandsoon.(somepeoplethinkthesetimefillersarewhatmakesuplifetheyareimportantandplentiful,butnotareasonforbeing)
3)GreatTasks
HoiYing 16daysagoNotthatit'sadirectsolutionforprocrastination,butIcanrecommend'BreakingTheHabitOfBeingYourself'by
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Notthatit'sadirectsolutionforprocrastination,butIcanrecommend'BreakingTheHabitOfBeingYourself'byJoeDispenza.It'saselfhelpbook(Icanhearyou'ugh'righthere),butIfindgreatvalueinitbecausehedigsintothecorenegativeemotionsthatpreventyoufromreachingyourfullpotentialandunderlieprocrastinationbehavioraswell.IfindhistechniquesworkingformeintryingtobecomeABetterPerson.Heusesmindfuless,meditation,observation.
WhatIfindvaluableisthatheaddressesthebodilymemoriesofeverytimetheMonkeyrunsamokinyourhead.Webecomebodilyattachedtothesensationsourthinkingcauses,whichiswhywecan'tjustrationally'letgo'ofunhealthybehavior.
Imightsoundalittlevague,butthepointisthatithelpedmerealizethatI'mADDICTEDtofeelingheavy,lethargic,tired,guilty,sad,etc.It'sbecomeallIknow.Therealizationthatthiswasonceanunhealthyseedplantedinmesomewheresometimeago,thatyoucanweeditandplanthealthyseedsyourself,isaneyeopenerforme.
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Anne 17daysago
seemore
Iamgoingtohavemyhusbandreadthisarticle.
Asothercommentershavesaid,yourdescriptionoftheprocrastinationmonkeyanditsvarioustricksandmethodsarespoton.I'velivedwiththemmywholelife,asmanyofyourreadershave.Ifindthatnonprocrastinatorshaveaveryhardtimewrappingtheirbrainsaroundtheconcept,anditcouldbepossiblethattheirmonkeystaysinacageandthey'venevermethim.So,toexplainwhyIcan'tfinishthepaintingIstarted2yearsago,ortheneedlepointfrom1980thatmygrandmotherbeganteachingmewith(!!!)doesn'tmakeanysensetothem.Atall.Ever.
Doesanyoneeverrolltheireyeswhensomeonesays,"Justdoit!"?Andwhydon'ttheyunderstanditisn'tassimpleasitsounds?Andtheargument"yes,itissimple.""no,itisn't.""yes,itis.""no,itisn't."can'tbewon.It'sthesameassaying"Ihaveamonkey.""Idon'thaveamonkey.""Ihaveamonkey.""Idon'thaveamonkey.""Ihaveamonkey.""Idon'thaveamonkey.""Ihaveamonkey.""Idon'thaveamonkey."Backtothetopic...
Ihopethatyoureloquent,clear,engagingandhumorousarticlemayenlightenmynonprocrastinatorhusbandalittlebit.I'mexcitedtosayitenlightenedmeonseveralfacets.1)Iamgoingtoerasethe2010todolistfrommydryeraseboardandreplaceitwithaquadrantchart.IwillimaginethethingsthatIdoandwhichquadrantstheygoin,evenifIdon'twritethemin.Iwilltrytospendmoretimeabovetheline.2)Iunderstandalittlebitmore
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Ben_K 18daysago
seemore
Hi,
IhavenevercommentedonanyofthepostsherebutIhavebeenreadingmostofthearticlesonthisblogsinceIfounditongooglequiteawhileback.Theseriesonprocrastinationhasopenedmyeyesandmademerealizehowmybrainfunctionswhenitcomestoaccomplishingcertaintasksworkforschool,athomeorevenstuffIneedtoworkonformyhobbies.Iamnow18yearsoldsinceacoupleofmonthsandonthevergeoffinishingschool.InthepastIhavebeenaheavyprocrastinatorwhenitcametotasksthatwerenotrealyimportanttome(butprobablyimportantformyteachersorotherpeople)i.e.homeworkorotherworkforschoolorforotherpeople.HoweveriftherewasanyworktobedonethatwouldensureagoodgradeifIinvestedsometimeintoit,IhavealwaysbeenabletoovercomethereignoftheMonkeyinsidemybrainandgetthejobdone(maybestillalittlelatebutitalwaysworkedout).ByreadingthisposthoweverIhave
DragosAlexandruCostiniu 20daysagoWell,hellothere.IamnotmuchofarepliertypeofguyIdonotactivelyfollowblogs,nordoIusuallyanswertothem.Butsometimes,somethingcatchesmyeye.AndIbegintotakeanactiveinterestonthetopic.IbegintoreadeverythingIcanaboutit,readalltherepliesand,iftheydonotdateback13yearsagoIseemtosomehowbeabletofindpostswhicharethatold,inparticular,buttheyarestillnewtomeIputinthetimetopostareplyofmyown.SohereissomethingthatcaughtmyeyeandIhavean
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seemore
postareplyofmyown.SohereissomethingthatcaughtmyeyeandIhaveanopinionofmyownIwouldliketofactorin.Forthosethatarenotinterestedinmybackgroundandmystoryofprocrastination,youcanskipthenextparagraphandgodirectlyformyopiniononthepostsomebackgroundmightstillbemixedinthereaswell,though.
I'vebeenpostponingthereadingoftheProcrastinationpostsforawhilenowalthoughIdidn'tknewoftheirexistencerightawayastheyhavebeenposted.Iseenowthat,atleastthisoneabouttheProcrastinationMatrix,theyhavenotbeenpostedthatlongago[oldestreply13daysagodidalittlemoreresearchontheroadseemsliketheoriginalonesdateacoupleofyearsbackups].Ireadthemstarting3daysago,while
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Lizzie 21daysago
seemore
Hi,
Longtimelurker,firsttimeposterhere.Thankyou,Tim,forall3ofyourarticlesonprocrastinationtheyhavereallyresonatedwithmeandperfectlydescribemylife.Yourdescriptionofprocrastinationanditscosts(theconstantstress,lettingothersdown,lettingyourselfdown,neverreachingQ2)andalltheterminologytheRDM,themonkey,thedark/happyplaygroundhavereallyhelpedmeunderstandwhat'sgoingoninmybrainwhenIprocrastinate.ThisarticlehasalsogivenmehopethatIcanreclaimcontrolofmylife(definedasbeingabletowalkfromQ4toQ2wheneverIwant)andhassimplifiedexactlywhatIhavetodotobeatmypeskymonkeyintosubmission(scheduleandlayjustonebrick,onebrickatatime).Importantly,you'vealsoshownmeexactlywhatIneedtodotogetfromQ4toQ2prioritisemytasksusingthematrix,choosethe12mostimportant/"urgent"goals/tasks(Ihavetokeepremindingmyselfthaturgentmeanswhatwouldbenefitmostfrombeingdonesoonerratherthanlater),breakitdownintosmallsteps,scheduleinatime/dateforeachstepandthenactuallystart.
Thestarting/doingisdefinitelythehardestpartbut2thingshavereallybeenhelpingmelaythosebricksthispastweek:(1)TheemailsyoumentionedreceivingfrompeopleofallagesfromallovertheworldIrealisedthatifIdon'tchangemystoryline,Iwillstillbeprocrastinatingin10yearstime,and20yearstime,and30yearstimethatthoughtterrifiesme.Idon'twanttolivetherestofmylifelikethis,andIdon'twanttolookbackonmylifewhenIamattheendofitandregretthe50/60yearsIprocrastinatedratherthanlivingmylifethewayI
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HoiYing 21daysago>LizzieSoundsgoodthosebabysteps.Countyoursmallvictories!I'mhappytoreadthatyou'relayingthosebricks,nomatterhowsmall,theycount.(Icandefinitelyidentifywiththat)
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Gavinconaghty 21daysagoThankyou.FromanImpostinatorandforgivinganideatotryforasolution.Beawareofthemonkey.:)
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KevinM 22daysago
seemore
Ihadthishuge1,000+wordemotionalpostwrittenwhenmybrowserdecidedtocrashanderaseallofit.Ithadsomeniceturnsofphrasetoo,andnowI'mprocrastinatingANDincrediblyirritated.Ijustwantedtoshare,andwritingiscatharsisonaQ1scale,especiallywhennegativeemotionsareinvolvedanddoublysuperespeciallywhenyoudon'thaveaclosefriendorSOtoconfidein.Ican'tbebotheredtowritethewholedamnthingagain,soI'lldoacondensedversion.
Theanthropomorphicpersonificationofthesenebulousemotionsandhabitualprocessesisincrediblyhelpful.Asavisualperson,ithelpstopicturethisprocrastinationthingasseparatefrommyself,notapersonalityflawthatisimmutable,butaparasitethatburrowedintomybrainatsomepointandcanbebeaten.
Forme,inwhatIfigureisafairlycommonoccurrence,procrastinationoccursincycles.Ispiraldownwardsasthemonkeyeliminatesonethingafteranother,capturingmoreandmoreofmytimeforQ4,untilsomethingsnapsandIreboundhard.Istartagainwithloftygoalsofselfimprovementandbeatingprocrastination,andinabout46monthsIcollapseinadepressed,anxiousmessofQ4apathyanddisgustandtryitallagain.It'shappenedinvariablysincethestartofcollege,soit'sbeenaboutfourcyclesnow,andthefifthhasjustbegun.
Towardstheend,especiallyiftheworkisdauntingandseeminglyinsurmountable,thepanicmonsterisintimidatedbytheanxietymonsterandthelastcheckonthemonkeyvanishes.Evenworse,theanxietymonstersticksaround,makingmefeelconstantstressandmakingmeevenmoreunproductive.Makingit
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KevinM 22daysago>KevinMUh,IguessIwaswrongaboutthecondensedpart.Didn'tevennoticetheabsurdlengthuntilIposted!Ijustchecked,thisisstill1k+wordsso,um,IguessIgotcarriedaway.Mybad?
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Me 22daysagoRememberYouAreMortal
"Peopleshouldlearntoorganizetheirthoughtandemotionaroundthefundamentalfactoflife.Thebasicfundamentalfactoflifeisthatyouaremortal.Yourthoughtprocessandyouremotionshouldbeorganizedaroundyourmortality.Youwillseeifyoujustdothis,youwillnaturallylivejoyfully,andatfullpotential.becauseeverymomentthethoughtisorganizedinsuchawaythatyouknowthatyouaremortal,thereisnotime.Thereisnotimetofret.Thereisnotimetofume.Thereisnotimetobeangry.Thereisdefinitelynotimetobedepressed.Thereisnotime,becauseitsgoing."
http://www.ishafoundation.org/...
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Mirko 25daysagoHithere!
IwantedtosharemythoughtsonthegoodaspectsofprocrastinationafterIreadthesecondpostaboutitherebutthenIwasn'tconfidentenoughtodoso.ButnowthatIwasencouragedexplicitly...
http://mqnc.de/en/procrastinat...IhopeyouguyslikeitandIhopeithelpssomeofyou!
BestregardsfromGermany!Mirko
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Jodi amonthagoSuchbrilliantwritingandpsychologicalinsight:
"ItturnsoutthatFutureYouisasmuchofamirageasthemonkeyspassionforahobby.IbankedonFutureTimsrealworldexistenceformymostimportantplans,buteverytimeIdfinallyarriveatatimewhenIthoughtIwouldfindFutureTim,hewasnowheretobefoundtheonlypersontherewouldbestupidPresentTim.ThatsthethingthatreallysucksaboutFutureYouwhenevertimefinallygetstohim,hesnotFutureYouanymore,hesPresentYou,andPresentYoucantdothetasksyouassignedtoFutureYoubecausethosetaskscanonlybedonebysomeonewithoutamonkey.YouassignedthemtoFutureYouinthefirstplacebecausehedoesnthaveamonkeythatwasthewholepoint.SoyoudowhatyoualwaysdoyouredelegatethemtoFutureYou,hopingthatnexttimetimecatchesupwithFutureYou,heactuallyexists."
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Jen amonthagoSo,afterprocrastinatingtoreadthisarticle(suggestedbymyhusbandyesterdaythatIhadtoreaditASAP),Iamcommentingforthefirsttimeonthisblog.
Thanksforhelpingmeexplaintopeopleinacolorfulwaywhatgoesoninsidemyhead.BeingasuccessfulImpostinator,turnedSuccessinator,itseemsactuallycategorizingtasksintotheappropriateQismycurrentAchillesheal.
I'mdivingfullfledgedintomyowndesignbusinessintwomonths(andalreadyhavethegearsgoing,ittookmewaylongerthanitwouldhaveifIdidn'thaveasuchastronginstantgratificationmonkey)andlovetheideaofsupportingyourblogbybuyingaplushmonkeytocuddlewithasItellitgetthehelloffthewheelinsidemyhead.
AndTim,Iwouldliketothankyourinstantgratificationmonkeyfortrickingyouintowritingthisblog.2
SbastienDubois amonthagoGreatblog,greatthoughts:)ToavoidprocrastinationrequiresunderstandingevermoredeeplytheWHYofourimmediatethoughtsandactions("why"asisthisblog'sandmyownmantra).Thatis,itrequiresbeingabletoconstantlyselfanalyze.ForthisIveryhighlyrecommendMarshallRosenberg'sbook"NonViolentCommunication",whichIalreadyoffereditto10differentpeople.Ifyoupreferamorespiritualbook,giveDonMiguelRuiz's"TheFourAgreements"ashot.
Procrastinationmayarisewhen,insteadofmaking(ornotmaking)choicesbasedonwhatweWANT(aswealwaysshould),wemakethembasedonwhatweareSUPPOSEDtodo.Thishappenswhenwedonottakefullresponsibilityforourthoughts,decisionsandactions,whichiseverytimewemakechoicesoutoffear,guilt,shame,dutyorobligation,e.g.whenconformingtosocialnorms.Anykindofconformanceisbydefinition
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shame,dutyorobligation,e.g.whenconformingtosocialnorms.Anykindofconformanceisbydefinitionsomethingthatgoesagainstourselves.
AsnicelysummarizedbyMarshallRosenberg:"Don'tdoanythingthatisn'tplay!"
Mypersonalformulationofthisistoseekonlyactionsthatyieldpositivefeelingssuchasgratitudeandfreedom.Unfortunatelyinthatquest,wheneverIencounterpeopleunabletoquestionthemselves,myabilitytoempathizeisgreatlyhindered,Istillhavemuchprogresstomake.Also,IfeellikeIhavefoundsolindinstrumentalgoals(avoiddogma,questioneverything,communicateclearly,seekfreedom,etc)butnotanyconcretegoal(i.e.somethingtoputonthehorizonfarinthefuture).
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TessDoucet amonthago
seemore
Ihavebeenchewingonthispostforaweek.Here'sthething.Wedon'tallhavetobeEisenhowers,right?Hecanonlyexistbecauseofmany,manysubordinateranks.
IhavebeentryingtolivemylifemakingroomforQ2asmuchasIcan,eliminatingmostQ1andQ3stuff.
IsetupabusinesscongruentwithwhatIcameupwithfallsinmyQ2(healtheworldpromoteworldpeacestartbyhelpingpeopleachievepersonalpeacesetupaserviceofferingpersonallyguidedmeditation.OfferitforfreetowhomeverIcanconvincetogetinhopewordofmouthspreads).
But,alas:mybusinessisfailingmiserably,andIhavecluesastohowitcouldwork,butamnotconvincedtheywillwork,soIsortofdecideditwasOKforthebusinesstofail.MaybethiswasnotthethingIwasmeanttodointheworld.
Andso,now:Ihavenolifeleft.Nojob,nomoneyofmyown(livingoffmypartner),notknowingwhattobelievein.
HalfheartedlyIamtryingtowrite,butitishardtobemotivated,tobelieveinmy"why",totrustthatIcanmakeadifferencesomehow.
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SbastienDubois amonthago>TessDoucetForsure,oneneedsdreamsandit'spossibletorealizethembylettinggoofwhatdragsyoubehind.MypersonalidolaboutthisisElonMusk,someonewithbigandmeaningfulgoals,andwhorealizesthem.
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RH amonthagoI'mgoodatQ1andQ4.MyearlyexperienceswithpanicmonsterwereawfulenoughthatIknowspendingtimeinQ1isimportantsothatIdon'thavetoseehimveryoften.AndI'vebeatendownmyIGMenoughinmylifetorealizefeedinghimnowandthenisalsoimportanttokeepingmeandmylifemovingforward,sometimesjustasimportantasvisitingQ1.LotsofselfawarenessandpracticetogetwhereI'matnow.
Q2and3arethetrickyonesforme.IkindofhateQ3.Ifeelthatifit'snotimportant,whyshouldIbother?Butsometimeseverydaylifethingsendupfallinginthisquadrant,soIbother.ButItrytoavoiditbecauseIhavelowlevelsofenergyanywayandIdon'twanttowastewhatI'vegot.ThatlowenergyisalsoproblematicforQ2.Iknowmanythingsthatfallintothisquadrant,butoftenI'mwornoutfromQ1andlettinginsomeQ3.ItseemstotakealotofQ4formetoreenergizeenoughtotackleQ2veryoften.
AsIwritethis,I'mwonderingifperhapsI'maSuccessinatoranddidn'trealizeit.MaybeI'mahighfunctioningSuccessinator.Idoknowthatmyphysicalandmentalhealthweighheavilyonmyenergylevelsand,lately,I'vebeenputtinginextraworktogettheminabetterplace.MaybeI'mjustonmywaytothebalanceIneed.Ofcourse,I'mcurrentlyinatemporary,highlyunchallenging,dulljobthatismerelytopaythebillswhileIsearchforsomethinginmyfieldthatgraduatedegreewillbeputtousesomeday,surely!So,itcouldbethatallmyQswillshiftwhenIfinallygetwhereI'mwantingtogo.
AndifIgoonwiththiscomment,IwillreallyjustberamblingI'mgoodatthat.Itmightevenbepartofmyprocrastinationrepertoire.
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wdqe amonthagowritingmydissertationandneededthispostTim.Didyoudoitaroundthistimethinkingofallthecollegekidsouttherethatwouldneedmajormotivationrightaboutnow?
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Anonymous amonthago
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Thisisanotheramazingpost.Thankyou.
I'llshareatimeplanthathasbeenmagicforme,amasterprocrastinator.I'mactuallygettingimportantQ2thingsdonebyusingit.ARussianwomaninventedthisplanforcreativetypes.Shegotmyattentionwhenshesaidthatmosttimeplanskeepyousobusythanitspiralsoutofcontrol.I'vehadthathappen.Yougetdoingmoreandmorestuffonyourlistandfeellikeamachine.Sheaddedthemagic'harmony'category(aQ4indisguise)Itriedthe4quadrantthingasatimemanagementtoolmanyyearsago.IloveyourmodificationsandrefinementstoEisenhower'sMatrixIlaughed...sotrue,verywelldone.EspeciallyclarifyingtheSuccesstinator'sissuesAsubtletrapI'vebeeninforyears.
HereisthisbrilliantRussianwoman'splanwhosenameIcannotremember:Yousimplylabelyourdaywith4parts:
1)Routine
everydaytypethingshavetobedone.dishes,shower,laundry,getgroceries,meals,answeremailswhatever.Theytaketime.
2)ImportantLittleThings
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Suncelesta 22daysago>AnonymousIbelievethatmusthavebeenYanaFrank?She'sgreatandshesavedmylifebytheseideassometimeago.However,therestillisthegreatproblemofdecidingwhichGreatTaskstochooseanddeterminingaretheyevensogreatandmeaningful.Unfortunately,thisisoftenveryunclear.I'verecentlyfoundmyselfbeingquiteefficientindoingwhateverIdo,butwhatasurprise!noneofthatseemstofallinQ2.
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Anonymous 13daysago>SuncelestaYes,thankyou,YanaFrank.Shedevelopedtimemanagementforcreativepersons.I'mhappytogivethispersoncreditforhertimemanagementsystem.Itcontinuestoworkforme.It'schallengingtotrytodevelopa'GreatTask'.Outofthemanycontenders.ThereisabookIcanrecommendthatmayhelp.Itisabookaboutwritingdownthingsthatareinyourheadinsuchawaythatyoucanreadyourownmindandsolveyourownproblems.Sayyouwroteabouttheproblemof'whatisthemostmeaningfulthingtomylifetoworkonrightnow'orsomethinglikethat.Youmayfindoutyouhavetheanswer.Haditallalong.Butyouhavetowriteitoutthewaytheauthorshowsyou.Iheardsomesmartpersonsayoncethat"youdon'tknowwhatyouknowuntilyouwriteitdown".It'ssotrue.Thisbookfocusesyouandhistechniquesworkamazinglywell.Justdoallhisexercises.(It'sasmall,shortbooksodon'tbeafraid)Andit'sfortechnicalwriterssojustchangethesubjectfrom'management'and'customers'toyourownpersonalissues:It'scalled"AccidentalGeniusRevolutionizeyourthinkingthroughprivatewriting"byMarkLevy.
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Suncelesta 13daysago>AnonymousThanks,IthinkI'mgoingtocheckthisout!
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SamKozman amonthagoThereisthisbeautifulironyabouthalfoftheemailscomingfromprocrastinatorsthatreadtheprocrastinationarticle,butmaybeironyisnttherightwordseeingashowbigofaproblemitis
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troublesometots amonthagoI'maDisastinator,damnit.Damnitdamnitdamnit.
MyMonkeyiswaaaytoopowerful.Whyisn'tmybookdone?NofearinducingdeadlineandapowerfulMonkey.
Excellentpost.Ihate/loveyousohardrightnow.3
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InnokentiySokolov amonthagoIt'sveryinterestingarticleandit'sclosetowhat'sinsidemyownhead.It'sabitclearertosortallthingsoutnow.Thankyou!
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Sharp amonthagoThankyouforthispost.Itprovidesmoreusefulinformationthansomewholebooksdo.
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ZbynkDrb amonthagoWonderifthemonkeyepidemicisaresultofoverindulgentchildrearingthatplacesemphasison"beingyourself"andshunsstufflikedisciplineandstructure.
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shaylabird amonthago>ZbynkDrbPersonally,Idon'tthinkso.IhadoneofthosechildhoodsandI'vealwaysbeenprettygoodwithtimemanagement.
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ZbynkDrb amonthago>shaylabirdTheregoesthelastchancetointerpretmychildhoodassomethinggoodformeintheend...
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DragosAlexandruCostiniu 20daysago
seemore
>ZbynkDrb
Letmestrikeanotherblowatthat,mate:I'vebeenhavingafatherthatalwayspressedonthatIshouldgoformilitaryschool,raisedmeinalmostlikemilitarydiscipline[helikedmilitaryalot,thoughhewasnotamilitaryman...perhapsthatwasoneofhisunaccomplisheddreamsthathesoughttoaccomplishthroughme?],butallatthesametimewhileallowingmetobewhoIamheneverforcedmetowritewithmyrighthandanddidn'tallowanyonetodothat[mygrandfathertried],gotmearoundtoseeandpracticediversesportsandallowedmetodowhichoneIlikedmostandstufflikethat.Hetriedtocombineinmethetwobestpractices:disciplineand"beingyourself"=freedom.Theresultwasand,toadegree,stillissatisfactory:sometimesIhaveadisciplinethatevenformyfatherishardtostomach,Ilikefreedomforeveryoneandeverything[people,animals,plants],andalthoughthingswerelookingalotbetterjustbeforeandatthebeginningofuni,theywentdownandIgotaroundtoprocrastinatingalotofmytimenow,asanadult.AndeventhoughIlikesomethingsIrarelytakeaction.Sotrytomakesomethingoutofthat.
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Acropoet amonthagoLet'stakethisastepfurtherandapplytheEisenhowerMatrixtojobs.Ofcourse,thereareunimportantthingsinourjobsthatwehavetodoandcouldevenbe"urgent",butletmedisregardthosebecausetheyactuallyhelpusgetthroughtheday.IammoreinterestedinQ1andQ2.Ibelievethatifyourjobisallaboutdeadlines,thatisinQ1,anditforcesyoutodotheworkonlywhenitisimportantANDurgent,thenyourjobcontrolsyouandbecomesunsatisfying.Ifyoucannotdotheimportantworkwhenyouwant,thatis,controlyourownuseofyourtime,youcannotbesatisfied.Onlywhenyoucontrolwhenyoudotheimportantworkinyourjobcanyoubesatisfiedwithit.Justathought.
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Micailyn amonthagoThankyousomuchforthisarticleandthetwopreviousarticlesIfoundthemveryencouraging,ifonlybecausetheyremindedmethatIamnotaloneinmytimewastinginsanity.
Myprocrastinationstorydoesnotexactlyfitintooneofthethreecategoriesinthispost,butallthreeprocrastinationpostshavedefinitelyexplaineddifferentcomponentsofit.
Ihaveprocrastinatedsinceelementaryschool,butthewayIhaveprocrastinatedandthedegreetowhichithasaffectedmylifehavechangedsignificantlyovertheyears(Iamnowinmyfirstyearofcollege).
Inelementaryschool,Iwasbasicallyasuccessinator,butIwouldactuallyprocrastinateinQ2withbooksthatwereworthreadingandthingsthatwereworthdoing.Irespondedtothepanicmonsterwithplentyofenergy,turnedmyworkinontime,gotgoodgrades,anddidn'tworryaboutschoolafterIhadturnedthingsin(i.e.Ineverexperiencedthe'mixedfeelingspark').TowardstheendofelementaryschoolIdidbegintoexperiencemixedfeelingsaboutmy
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theendofelementaryschoolIdidbegintoexperiencemixedfeelingsaboutmywork,soIgotmyacttogetheralittlemore.DuringthattimeIoftenexperienced
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Anne 17daysago>MicailynGreatjobinbeingawareofyourselfandtakingyourselfoutofadangerousplace.I'mgladyou'rebuckingthecycle.Askforhelpifyouneedit,andkeepmoving.Movement,inwhateverdirection,isinertia,andonceyou'removingit'seasiertofindtheRIGHTdirection.Whenyoustop,theeasiestdirectionisDOWN.Goodluck.
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VeronikaH.Drageid amonthago>MicailynSowellwritten!Evenifourlivesaredifferent,formetoohasprocrastinationresultedinisolation,lowselfesteemanddepression.
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Micailyn amonthago>MicailynIjustrealizedthatityped"ofcourse"twiceinarowandit'sdrivingmeinsane.
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Nikhil amonthagoHolycow,IdidnotthinkwhenIstartedreadingthisarticlethatitwouldleavemefeelingemotional.Thescary/creepypartaboutthiswasthatIwasreadingthisonaFridayafternoonhavingalreadyprocrastinatedallmyworkforthefollowingweek.BytheendofitthoughIfeltashamedandmotivatedallatthesametime,todosomethinggoodinmylife.
Ijusthope,justsodearlyhopethatIdidnotdelegatethatresponsibilitytofutureNikhil.4
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Eric amonthagoAfewthoughtsI'vebeenmullingoverthepastcoupleofdays...
FutureEricmaynotexist,butFuturePresentEricisveryreal.PresentErichasaresponsibilitynottofuckupFuturePresentEric.FuturePresentEric'swillpowerisfiniteandextremelyvaluable.Treatitwisely.Don'tovercommitFuturePresentEric'swillpower.Infact,don'tovercommitFuturePresentEricatall.OnlyvolunteerFuturePresentEricforthingsthatreallymatter.Excitabilityisacharacterweakness.(Excitability,notenthusiasm.)Excitabilitywastespreciouswillpower.ItundercommitsPresentEricandovercommitsFuturePresentEric.Themonkeyisexcitable.(SoisthePanicMonster,forthatmatter.)ControlledandFocusedwinsthedayoverExcitability.Sorry,monkey.ItisimportantthatItreatotherswell.KeepingmycommitmentstootherskeepingthemfullyandinatimelymannerisanimportantwaythatItreatotherswell.OvercommittingFuturePresentEricmeansIeventuallyletsomeonedown.ItisimportantthatItreatmyselfwell.ThestressandguiltthatcomesfromovercommittingFuturePresentEric'swillpowermeansthatI'mnottreatingmyselfwell.Paradoxically,FuturePresentEricwillhave*more*willpowerandthereforewillbeabletodomorethingsifPresentEriccanavoidprecommittingtoomuchofFPE'swillpower.ThestressandguiltofhavingtoomanycommitmentsdrainsFPE'swillpowerandturnshimintoalesserversionofhimself.TurningFuturePresentEricintoalesserversionofhimselffuckshimup.AndPresentErichasaresponsibilitynottofuckupFuturePresentEric.
That'sallIhavefornow.5
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HoiYing amonthago>EricThankyouforthis.WhenIreadabouttheProcrastinationMatrix,Ican'thelpbutfallintothatdarkplacewhereIbelievethatnothingIdowilleverbeenough,whichmakesbasicallysingleeffortpointless.
IthelpsmetoknowthatthereisaFuturePresentMebetweenthePresentMeandtheFutureMe.Whoonlyhastofocusononething:treatmyselfandotherswellTODAYandkeepmycommitmentsforTODAY.Whocanberewardedforthelittlestofthings,likemakingapromisetovisitafriendandmanagingtoactuallyshowup(andnothingmorethanjustshowingup).IfIcommittomore,Iparalyze.
Idowonderwhatyoumeanbyexcitementandenthousiasmthoughisenthousiasmtherealisticversionofexcitementbyyourdefinition?
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Eric amonthago>HoiYingYeah,Ihearyou.Ispentseveralyearsinthatdarkplaceyou'retalkingaboutwhenIfirsttriedtostartabusiness.TheparalysisofhavingsomuchI*should*dotranslatedintolongstretcheswhereIwouldn'tdo*anything*.Itwreakedhavoconmyconfidence,myhealth,mymarriage,prettymucheverything.Thelastfiveyearshavebeenprogressivelybetterandbetter,butI'mstillpronetoperiodicrelapses.IthelpsalotwhenIremembertoremindmyselftotreatotherswellandtotreatmyselfwell...Likeyousaid,evenifit'ssmall,itstillmatters,andit'softenenoughtogetmemoving.
WhenIsay"excitable",Imean"respondingtooreadilytosomethingneworstimulatingtooeasilyexcited."(ItotallystolethatfromtheGoogledictionary.)Basically,I'mjustdescribingthemonkey...helovesstimulusbutdoesn'twanttoactuallyworktodoanythingwiththatstimulus.
Enthusiasmismorematureandproductivethanexcitability.Itjustmeans"intenseenjoymentorinterest."(IstolethatfromWikipedia.)IthinkEnthusiasmisakeyingredientinthe"Flow"statethatTimdescribesinPart2ofhisoriginalProcrastinationposts.
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CookieFonster amonthagoi'mmyselfstillinhighschoolifinditprettyneattoreadthispostbeforeigettoallthecrazyrealworldstuff.
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VeronikaH.Drageid amonthago>CookieFonsterOh,IreallyhopeyoudoyourbesttotametheIGMonkey,becausepracticemakeperfect,andtherearesomuchbetterthingstobecomegoodatthanprocrastination.Actuallyalmostanythingisbetter.
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Vishakha amonthagoIloveyourInstantGratificationMonkeyforthatonemomentinwhichhetrickedyouintowritingblogs,bestthingthathappenedtoyouandtous.Andeveryoneherelovesyourshittystickdrawings.ThatyoungTimissomuchsimilartomethatIthinkheismysoulmate.Iamtryingmybesttocontrolmymonkeyanddidyoujustnoticehowyouused'she'foranImpostinator?Yeah,that'sme.YourblogismyQ4.Keepupthegoodwork.:)
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RajarshiGhosh amonthagoAbrilliantarticle,andsuperbinsights.IfeeltobeinQ4now,assittinginofficeinafridayafternoonandreadingthisarticle,Ihaveprocrastinatedallmypendingwork.Ihavebeenfollowingyourarticlesforquitesometime,beginningwith'GenerationYYuppies',andwhatIamwitnessingrightnowisthatyouareabletotouchpeoplearoundtheworldwiththemostbasicthingswefaceinourdailylives.Itmaybeworthwhiletofeedyourmonkeywiththeideaofbecominganorator,perhapsanappearanceatTedTalksandbecomingalifestylemanagementguruinthelongrun.Themonkeywouldloveit,especiallywithallthegratificationhewouldget.JustgetyourRDMenthusiasticabouttheidea,andwell,youmayrealizeyourpotentialsoonerthanyouwouldhavethought!
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Dimitrije amonthagoIcouldwritealongcommentabouthowthispostresonatedwithmeonareallydeeplevel(andmaybeIwillatsomepoint),butfornow,I'lljustsaythatI'veprobablyneverbeenmoreproductiveinmylifethanforthelasttwodays,afterreadingthisstuffandchangingafewsmallthingsinmybehavior(forexample,saying"notnow,monkey"outloudatcertainpoints).Justtherealizationofthetruenatureofmyproblem,whichyouexplainedsothoroughlyandaccurately,wasenoughtoimmediatelyputmeintoacompletelydifferentmindframe.We'llseeifitlasts.ThankyouTim,thiswasoneofthebestpiecesoflifeadvicethatIevergot,literally(andIdon'tusethatwordunlessIreallymeanit).
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autheclified amonthagoImpostinatorhere.InthreemonthsI'llbedonewithschoolandI'mscaredshitless.Iguessit'snormaltonotknowthedifferencebetween"important"and"unimportant"atmyage,butshit,thismakesitreallyhardformetodifferbetweenthefirstthreequadrants.Thedifficultthingis...Ireallywanttobecomeanactress,butmypassiononlyslightlyoverpowersmydoubt.Mymomwantsmetobecomeadoctor,andifIwasforcedtomakethemost"ethical"choice,I'dbeinmedschooleventhoughIreallydon'twantto.AllItrulyknowisthatIwanttocreatestuffandmovepeople,butIgeteasilydistracted(fuckingmonkey)andeasilyfrustrated(fuckingselfconsciousness).IwishIknewwhoIwanttobebutI'mscaredofbeingaware.
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