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1
THE PANTHER -‐ a play in 2 acts, 80 minutes -‐
2009
CAMILA APPEL
TRANSLATED BY ELISA CORBETT
* all rights reserved. Registered with Escritório de Direitos Autorais da Fundação
Biblioteca Nacional*
2
The Panther (In Jardim des Plantes, Paris) Translated from German by Stephen Mitchell. His vision, from the constantly passing bars, has grown so weary that it cannot hold anything else. It seems to him there are a thousand bars; and behind the bars, no world. As he paces in cramped circles, over and over, the movement of his powerful soft strides is like a ritual dance around a center in which a mighty will stands paralyzed. Only at times, the curtain of the pupils lifts, quietly-‐-‐. An image enters in, rushes down through the tensed, arrested muscles, plunges into the heart and is gone. Rainer Maria Rilke
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THE PANTHER
CHARACTERS: SHE: approximately 30 years of age. HE: approximately 30 years of age. PANTHER: roar/play of shadow and light to the discretion of the direction. TIME: present. PLACE: an upper-‐middle class supermarket. SCENE 1 – SHOPPING IN THE SUPERMARKET
There are three parallel aisles. The first one (from left to right) carries
cleaning, gardening and personal hygiene products. In the second one, there are juices and alcoholic beverages on one side and spices and sauces on the other. In the third aisle, there are candies, cakes, candles and products for birthday parties such as balloons, and a fruit and vegetable table in the center.
I suggest that the scenery does not realistically portray a supermarket and the products should not be familiar to the public. Scenography can abstract from this idea of three parallel aisles suggesting a supermarket, as long as there is a claustrophobic feeling on stage.
The supermarket is lit by a white light. There is a red sign that says “EXIT” on the right hand side of the stage. The sign’s red light is off.
HE and SHE choose products placing them on the trolley, which is driven by He.
They speak in a low voice. The audience cannot understand what they are saying. The dialogue begins right after the third bell.
HE It can’t survive.
SHE And what should we do, lock it up?
HE (Ironically)
No, we can put screens everywhere.
SHE I’m not living in a prison.
HE (Looks at a shelf, refers to the products, colored boxes)
What’s the difference?
4
SHE There must be another way.
HE Well, we can live in an apartment.
SHE No, I’ve always lived in a house; I like houses. I spent two years designing one for us. How can you say something like this?
HE (Picks up a box, reads the package, talks to himself)
Air ticket for the World Cup, I’m taking this one. (Puts the box in the trolley).
If we let it loose, it will die.
SHE He’s going to die anyhow, someday, and I do hope it’ll be before us. I prefer the one with fewer calories.
HE It’s simple: either we live in a house and buy a dog, or in an apartment with a cat. These are just as fattening, it’s the amount of fat you should check.
SHE I want a cat, in a house, and free!
HE I know. But if it is let loose, it won’t survive.
SHE Can’t you see how preposterous that is?
HE (Thinks a little and says...)
No.
SHE How come an animal must be imprisoned to survive?
HE This is how things are.
SHE Ahh, let’s hurry. We don’t have much time. Give me the list.
5
HE Here.
HE offers Her the shopping list. She does not take it, distracted
with what she is saying.
SHE (Quickly)
Oh, I’m anxious. I know it’s normal. Everyone goes through this, that is, almost everyone. My aunt, poor thing, so many boyfriends, she was always almost there. There’s a pit in my stomach, and it’s not from the diet to look good in the dress, it’s anxiety. What if no one shows up? No, absolutely no one isn’t possible.
(Sighs poetically) And today I woke up with a strange feeling...Like one of those days that you spend thinking it’s going to rain at any moment, but it never does. All the water gets trapped somewhere above there, humidity caught in the air.
She takes the shopping list from his hands.
HE
Some people call that a cloud.
SHE You’ll never understand this feeling. It’s very subtle. It’s a gut feeling that something is about to happen. I know it’s coming and I’m ready. I’m ready for the bang!
HE I feel that since I was a child and the big bang has not yet hit me...
She hands him a cranberry juice bottle for him to place in the cart.
SHE Here, we’re only taking two of these,
HE Is this that super juice?
SHE They say cranberry is very good for your health.
6
HE Who the hell says that?
SHE Doctor Amapola.
HE (Mockingly)
Your gyn?
SHE Yeah. There are some anti-‐oxidant thingies in there...
HE Oh, anti-‐oxidant thingies. Ok, but leave the juice behind because they take up a lot of space and slow down the cart. I’ll pick them up at the end while you wait in line at the cashier’s.
SHE He has e-‐v-‐e-‐r-‐y-‐t-‐h-‐i-‐n-‐g organized.
HE You must have a plan to optimize time and space. Now for the greenies.
SHE
Let’s crab some redies, we need more tomatoes; I don’t think you got enough.
HE More tomatoes on their way!
He runs pushing the cart.
SHE
Wait for me my little leopard!
She crabs his arm.
HE Little leopard? That’s new...
SHE It’s about time we had our own pet names.
HE Oh, is the time of normal names gone?
7
SHE Well... I want more intimacy.
HE It’s being sold over there in aisle 8... babe.
SHE No, not babe, it’s too generic.
HE May I look at the list, my butterfly?
She hands him the list.
SHE (Mockingly)
Butterflies are too fragile, they only live for a day. Our love is strong and everlasting!
HE (Looking at the list)
Six packs of toilet paper? Why don’t we get only what we need for the party? We don’t have a lot of time and you have here cat food for a cat we don’t even have yet.
SHE That’s it! I can call you tomcat, my tomcat...
HE Then I’ll never know if you are calling the actual cat or me.
SHE I’m going to call him by his name, Sebastian.
HE The pet has a person’s name and I’m named after a pet.
She picks up a thick chocolate bar, the one that’s specific for cooking.
SHE
Do we have enough dessert for everyone?
HE Yes.
8
SHE Well, I’m taking this anyway. I want to make you something.
(Showing she knows what’s his favorite dessert) Chocolate mousse, huh?
HE They have some very thorough research on that.
SHE On what?
HE A couple puts on weight after they get married, because one keeps trying to please the other with their favorite foods. Wives usually put on more weight than husbands.
SHE Spoilsport, I was only trying to be nice...
HE (About the research)
It’s true though...
SHE (Placing the chocolate bar in the cart)
Come.
They get to the vegetables. She picks up a carrot.
HE
Got it; I’m calling you my little rabbit.
SHE I’m not that fond of carrots.
HE Rabbits have a bunch o kids...
SHE So?
HE (Puts his hands on her belly)
A bunch of babies in this cute belly.
9
She takes his hands off and starts putting tomatoes in a transparent plastic bag.
SHE So why don’t you call me chicken, since all I’m going to do is lay eggs.
HE Oh, but it’s not just any chicken...It’s my hot, tanned, yummy chicken.
SHE I don’t like chicken, least of all baked ones.
She puts the tomatoes in the cart. She takes the list from his hand and a pen from her bag and crosses something out.
SHE
I love crossing things out from the shopping list. It feels like mission accomplished. We need more beef sauce.
HE More?
SHE It’s never too much, if it’s for your family.
HE And lets get...
SHE (Interrupting)
Oh, I need deodorant, come here.
HE Mustard for the sauce is right here. You don’t want to go for all your basic needs now, do you?
They get to the mustard shelf.
SHE There is nothing basic about my needs. Is this the mustard you’re using?
10
HE Yeah.
He puts two mustard jars in the cart and picks up a can of sauce.
SHE
Look at this ready-‐made sauce; it’s on sale. It could be good for an emergency.
HE Oh no, that’s what’ll give me an emergency, that’s why you took it off the menu.
SHE Today’s menu?
HE No...the wedding’s.
SHE Our wedding’s menu my sugar loaf?
HE Yes, our wedding’s, my cotton candy. Oh, stop that, I’m feeling ridiculous.
She places the sauce in the shopping cart. He doesn’t notice.
SHE
Love is ridiculous, come here my fiancé. She kisses him on the cheek.
HE
I hate this title, fiancé. Something in the middle, which neither means single nor married. You’re neither happy nor screwed. I’m in a nothing state. The dictionary should say, fiancé: that which is in a state of constant pause, in limbo.
SHE I didn’t change the menu, mother did. Mother was in charge of that.
HE My mother?
11
SHE I like calling her mother. She is our mom. My mother would be in charge, if she was alive, of course. Let’s get the deodorant now?
He picks up a candle.
HE Can you give me a minute? I wanted to crab something here.
SHE Crab it then.
HE
It’s a surprise for you... Could you...
SHE Ok, ok, I’ll give you some space. He wants privacy even in the supermarket.
She leaves and goes to aisle 1. He picks up a cake and hides it under other products. She returns holding several packs of toilet paper.
SHE
Here it is. This is something we can’t be without.
HE That many? We’re going to travel.
SHE In this matter you’re the one that doesn’t optimize time and space. I go there, do what I have to do and leave. You don’t. You take ages in there...philosophizing about life... I know what it is; men have erogenous zones behind there...
HE (In a bad mood)
Oh, men, is it?
SHE Where’s your sense of humor? You get bored in the supermarket, come here and I’ll make your eyes shine.
She makes him stand at front stage and puts a white bucket on his head and signals him to
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wait. Then she goes to the end of the aisle and walks towards him holding a bunch of broccoli like bouquet and humming the bridal march. They stop, arm in arm, facing the audience, as if they were in church.
HE
Who’s Lisa taking to the wedding?
SHE Uh?
HE Lisa. Who’s she taking to the wedding?
SHE Why?
HE I was thinking of introducing her to Antonio.
SHE Oh. You think he would like her?
HE Of course!
SHE Why of course? Because she’s hot?
HE ...yes.
SHE Well, she will certainly look beautiful. She had a dress especially made; it’s called tattoo. Do you know why?
HE Because it’s impossible to take off?
SHE No stupid, because it’s close to the skin.
13
HE (To himself)
Hummm...
She runs her hand through the spice jars looking for something. She squats and looks at the jars on the bottommost shelf.
SHE
Look what I found! The best black pepper in the world.
She gets up with the product in her hand.
HE
(Thinking) The one and only.
SHE A really great product, with an edge… Who else makes organic black pepper? I want to see anyone who has the courage to come up with organic spices with all... all the sustainable advantages, like you did.
HE That’s it; I want to see someone who does that!
SHE It’s a little expensive, isn’t it?
HE
Sales are dropping. I cannot decrease the margins. But this is what screws it up, the consumer has to kneel down to pick up the product!
SHE And what’s wrong with that?
HE Most purchases are impulse buys, decided on the spot, and people are lazy. Only those specifically looking for this brand are going to bend down to look for it.
SHE I was specifically looking for this product.
HE Because you designed it.
14
SHE
So you could sell it.
HE Thank you light of my life.
SHE Light of my life is corny, isn’t it my angel?
HE I can’t do my angel and light of my life. My little leopard is out of the question. Babe is too common, my butterfly is too fragile. See?
SHE Let’s stick with mine then.
HE What? Mine?
SHE I’ll call you mine and you call me mine.
HE Listen to that! Your dad will love to hear me calling you mine. But that’s what you are; all mine. Come here.
He embraces her possessively.
SHE Don’t squeeze me like this; I need to pee.
He releases her.
HE
Go to the bathroom then.
SHE Yeah...
She feels something strange in the air.
SHE
Do you think there’s a ladies room here?
15
HE (Ironically)
No. Employees don’t pee, shit, or anything.
SHE Ok. Don’t abandon the cart anywhere, ok mine?
HE No one is going to steal our cart, mine.
SHE (Looking around her)
Well... The place is not exactly full. I don’t see a single person around.
She leaves stage. He checks if anyone is watching and swaps the products from the competing brand for his, putting them on the shelf that levels with the eyes.
She returns and notices what He is doing. He turns around.
HE
(Feeling caught) Already?
She is paralyzed, scared.
SHE
I-‐I didn’t find anyone.
HE Ahn?
SHE (Whispering)
There’s no one in here but the two of us.
HE Oh really!
SHE Let’s go?
16
HE
I’m going to check the other side.
SHE No...
HE
Just a sec.
SHE Something really bad must have happened. I’m calling your mom.
He leaves. She takes her cell phone from her bag, and dials. The call does not go through. She walks around the supermarket, trying to find the signal. She takes everything out of the cart, putting the products on the floor. She sees the cake. She climbs in the cart to try a signal higher up. He returns.
HE
What’re you doing?
SHE The cell does not work!
HE Get down you monkey; you’ll fall down...
SHE Have you found anyone?
HE No, no one.
SHE (Climbing down)
Let’s go.
HE It’s Saturday evening, the supermarket must close around eleven.
17
SHE Some big celebrity must have died, come.
HE And leave the stuff here? Humm, and I was making you a surprise...
He throws the candle in the cart and leaves stage. Music. Lights fade; all the audience can see is the shadow outline of the supermarket.
SCENE 2 – CAUGHT IN THE SUPERMARKET
They start talking backstage. Lights start going back to normal as they come up on stage.
SHE
Incredible! How did they lock us in here?!
HE I have no idea.
They enter stage. Lights are on.
SHE It doesn’t make any sense, have you ever heard of something like this?
HE (He may only shake his head)
No.
SHE For heaven’s sake, do something!
HE Shoot, I’m...
SHE Frozen, completely, I can see that.
(Shouting to the ceiling) Hey! Uhu! Hello there.
18
HE Calm down, it’s not so bad.
SHE What?
HE I’ll check if the backdoors are open.
He’s about to leave, hears her shouting and comes back.
SHE
(Shouting to nowhere in particular) Hello, anyone there? There’re people in here! Hello!
HE It’s easier if you use the phone.
SHE (Taking a deep breath)
Mine is not working. Can I borrow yours?
He takes his phone from his pocket, gives it to her and leaves stage. She climbs in the cart trying to find a signal again. She dials something but the connection fails.
SHE
Amazing. This shit doesn’t work! Hello! Anyone there?
She sits inside the cart wrapping her arms around her legs. Holding his phone she starts to check it reading his text messages. She reacts negatively to something she reads. He comes in. She dissimulates and puts the mobile in her bag.
SHE So?
19
HE Nothing.
SHE (Ironically)
Nothing...
HE Couldn’t open a single door, it’s very strange, we are locked...
SHE How incompetent!
HE This is not my fault. There’s no way out.
SHE
That’s impossible. You just couldn’t find one. If you can’t get us out of a situation that’s not so bad...”
HE It’s not easy either...
SHE ... I don’t even want to think how it’ll be when we have children.
HE Some free association! From trapped in a supermarket to kids.
SHE I don’t want to talk about this now.
HE That would be interesting...
SHE (In a cold sweat)
Love, I have some kind of phobia of these things. Everything is turning, I’m going to faint.
He massages her shoulders (She is still sitting inside the cart). She takes a deep breath and begins to relax.
HE
Relax... I’ve never seen you like this before. Don’t you dare faint and leave me here alone.
20
She takes some medication from her bag.
HE
What’s that one for?
SHE For anything.
She takes the pill.
SHE How are we going to get out of here?
HE Did you reach anyone?
SHE (Still in a cold sweat)
I can’t get a signal. (Looking around, she feels claustrophobic)
Oooooh...
HE That’s psychological. We’ve been here for a long time and you were doing fine. Who did you try calling?
SHE 911.
HE Do you want me to make a fool of myself with the police? Stop being neurotic!
SHE Bastard.
HE Sorry.
SHE Why don’t you go to the cashier and try to find some kind of emergency button?
He goes off stage
He (Off stage)
Ok.
21
SHE
(Taking the mobile from her bag) I’ll check if we have a signal now.
HE Shit, I can’t see any button.
SHE (To herself)
Ah, I’m dizzy...
(To him at the back) There must be some emergency button there, something red, an alarm or emergency thing.
HE Oh, I’m going to try this one. It lit up here at the cashier. Oh, it’s to call the manager.
SHE Hurry up. I’m not feeling well!!!
HE Oh, so why don’t you call Doctor Amapola?
SHE What does my gyn have to with this?
HE She must be a therapist too; you’re always in her office.
SHE She is much more than that. Did you find the button?
HE Found several, but all are useless.
He returns with a radio in his hands
HE
You two have secrets, is that it?
SHE Look who’s talking! I don’t concoct secret plans without telling you.
22
HE Have you lost it?
SHE (Climbing out of the cart)
I saw a message from Antonio in your phone. He’s all happy because you want to introduce Lisa to him. Why have you talked to him without consulting me?
(Changing the tone of voice) What are you going to do with this radio?
HE What’s the problem with introducing them?
He puts the radio on the floor and tries to tune into a station.
SHE
You wrote: “She’s your type, it’s a sure thing.”
HE Since when do you check my messages?
SHE Why is it a “sure thing”?
HE Since when do you check my messages?
SHE You think every single man will fall for Lisa?
HE (Speaking or gesticulating)
Cut it out?!
SHE Ok, it’s ok... She is very beautiful indeed. Everyone drools over her, men and women. I can see how it will be. She’ll be next to me in church in that sexy red tattoo dress and I’ll be all in white looking like a nun. What will your friends be thinking? They’ll say, that’s a lucky guy; I’d marry anyone who has a best friend that looks like this.
HE Your full of it...
23
SHE (Feeling claustrophobic. To herself)
Oooh, There’s that chill again. Should I take another one?
HE I just tuned in to something.
SHE The news?
HE News from God, It’s a Baptist radio. Let me try finding a different one.
SHE Your mother likes listening to these religious radios.
HE She likes the music, says it’s uplifting.
SHE I tried calling her, again, not the Police. She’s my number 1 dial up.
HE (Understanding, remembering she has already lost her mother)
Yes, I know my love.
He hugs her.
HE Are you feeling better? Soon someone will come to get us ou...
SHE She even said I was a very understanding woman, because I didn’t mind you having so many close female friends.
HE Please don’t start with that jealousy stuff. You must learn how to control that.
He grabs the radio.
SHE Oh yeah, I must control things well. Who you go out with, where do you go, at what time you leave, what time you get back.
HE For heavens’ sake, make this shit work!
He throws the radio on the floor, and hears a sound much
24
louder than the one made by the radio falling down.
HE
Did you hear that?
SHE What, you detonating your super tool to get us out of here? U-‐hu.
HE There’s someone else here. I’ll be right back.
He goes to aisle 3 and listens for more noise. He’s unsure about what to do and does not move. He is the only one to hear a noise neither she nor the audience can hear anything. He reacts because he finds it strange.
SHE
Don’t leave me alone...I’m not feeling well...
She looks around, noticing she’s alone. She wraps her arms around her as if she’s cold.
SHE
I’m not well today. I know I push you away when I treat you like this. Why do I do it?
She lowers her head in distress. He returns.
HE
(Puffing) You’re not going to believe this.
SHE Hold me?
25
HE (Desperately)
There’s no time for this now; this is an emergency! I think there’s someone else in here. And this someone is making strange noises. Do you believe I couldn’t open a single door? We’re locked in here and there’s someone else with us. Are you listening to me?
SHE (Downcast, not even listening)
Yes.
HE Do something. Don’t just stay there with this look on your face.
SHE Don’t blame your incompetence on me.
HE Well, aren’t you always saying you are Wonder Woman? So, now it’s time to show your powers.
SHE (Screaming)
Oh! Wonder Woman was Lisa’s nickname! I was Cat Woman! Cat Woman! You fantasize about Wonder Woman, don’t you? Tell me; tell me you’d rather have her. Confess!
HE (Calmly)
Yes. That’s it. I fantasize I’m in bed with Wonder Woman. That’s it. (Screaming)
And Wonder Woman is Lisa!
They hear the Panther’s ROAR. They get scared and hide under the shelves, or somewhere on stage, which can be seen from the audience. Lights dim, the audience can see the silhouettes of the objects on scene, and that of the couple. He moves his head looking for something. She is completely paralyzed.
26
SCENE 3 – THE PANTHER
They pant loudly. Lights are still dim.
SHE What was that?
HE I have no idea.
SHE What was it!
HE Shush, be quiet.
The panther purrs.
SHE Holy shit, is there a beast in here?
HE Yes.
SHE There’s a beast in here!
HE Shush! Be quiet.
The panther stops making noises. Lights go back to normal
HE
(Getting up) Come.
SHE Are you insane?
HE It’s at the back of the supermarket. Listen
Short break, they hear sounds of “dogs in the trash”.
27
HE
That’s where the meats are.
SHE (Getting up)
It’s a wild beast, I’m sure it’s a wild beast. What kind of thing makes noises like these?
HE We must find a way to protect ourselves for when it comes back.
SHE Come back? Why come back?
HE Animals attack when they are hungry or in self-‐defense.
SHE There’s enough meat for months, back there.
HE But some attack just for fun.
SHE Help! Help!
He covers her mouth with his hand.
HE
Shush, stop calling attention. Animals also attack when they feel fear from their prey. They can smell fear. And they first go for the weakest. You must be careful.
SHE
(Taking his hand away from her mouth) So I am the weakest one, am I?
HE Help me get some boxes. We need to make a base for us, divide the territory.
They start pilling up boxes, making a small circle around them (the area barely fits two people).
28
SHE They have x-‐ray vision for feelings. They can see you are trying to hide your fear. It can see that the noise I make is superficial and that yours is much more dangerous. It’s the sound of a repressed man.
HE Thanks love. Look, let’s make a weapon. Animals are afraid of fire.
More noises come from the back of the supermarket.
SHE
They have alcohol in the next aisle. It’s the cleaning products aisle. They have cloths, brooms and lighters. You can go and pick...
HE I’ll bring everything over here and you can wrap the broom with the cloth, soak it in alcohol and get ready to set fire to it. Got it?
SHE Got it.
He comes in through the passage. She holds his arm.
SHE
I like seeing you take care of things. You're my man.
HE Be careful. Don’t make sudden moves and don’t even think about getting out of here.
He goes to the middle aisle and gets to Aisle 1. He hands her a broom, then a cloth. She wraps the cloth around the broom. He hands her the alcohol. She puts alcohol on the cloth. He returns to where she is.
HE (Trying to cheer himself up)
Great. (Practically)
Now we go in our fort and close the entrance.
29
They go in. They are cramped inside and can hardly move.
SHE
Ok, I’m ready. I can do this. Can you hand me the lighter?
He doesn’t answer.
SHE The lighter!
He looks down.
SHE Fuck! What am I going to do with this, hit the beast on the head?
HE I couldn’t find a lighter.
SHE Do I have to do everything? What else scares these beasts?
HE Uhum...
SHE (Teasing him)
Uhum...
She stands up to get a lighter from her purse.
HE
Fire...
SHE Really.
HE Wait! Fire, water! Where’s that juice?
SHE (She gets the juice)
Here.
She opens it.
30
HE When it comes, we’ll throw this, and it’ll run away...
SHE Really, it’ll disappear. Noise! Check if you can find anything that makes some noise.
The panther purrs, not aggressively. Its shadow goes by slowly, but not threatening.
She throws the cranberry juice at the shadow. For the remaining of the play, the juice stays on the floor and they spread this red liquid all over the supermarket’s white floor. They scare the shadow, which runs away.
SHE
Holy shit, it’s big.
HE She’s huge.
SHE Why SHE?
HE The shadow looks like a she panther.
SHE Shadows are black. What’s this about seeing females everywhere?
She takes a lighter from her bag, and ignites it. She crabs the alcohol with the other hand.
SHE
Come kitty kitty. I’m going to set your cute panther’s ass on fire...
HE Now you are in “female exterminator mode”, are you?
31
SHE That’s it.
(As if calling a cat) Come, tisk, tisk, tisk. Hey, where did you get that lighter?
She keeps calling for a cat and doesn’t answer. He pulls her by the arm. She holds the lighter close to his face.
HE
Hadn’t I told you to stop smoking?
SHE (Nodding)
Yeah.
HE (Takes the lighter from her hand)
Have you started smoking again?
SHE I never stopped. I kind of gave it a break, but never actually stopped.
HE Smoking is the stupidest thing in the world.
SHE Doesn’t seem to be what’s threatening our lives at the moment.
The Panthers shadow comes back; it is curious, not aggressive. They stare at the shadow. She soaks the cloth in alcohol hurriedly and tries to light it with the lighter. The cloth does not catch fire. The shadow is startled and leaves annoyed.
SHE
Oh!
32
HE Not cool, this is not cool.
SHE Did you get a cloth that is nonflammable?
HE Have you ever seen a flammable cloth to sell?
SHE Great. No water, no fire, no sound...
HE We can set one of these boxes on fire...
SHE And let it spread throughout the supermarket with us trapped inside.
Break, they sigh.
SHE Do you think it escaped somewhere?
HE No. They allowed it to go shopping.
SHE Isn’t there a zoo nearby?
HE I think so.
She walks out of the base with the mop.
SHE It spent its whole life in prison...
HE (Not sure if he agrees with the term prison)
Yeah.
SHE (With pity)
It must be feeling lonely.
HE But not for long, any minute now someone will come to take it back to its family.
33
SHE Why do you think it ran away?
He returns to the base.
HE How can I possibly know that? Maybe it’s the different one.
SHE What?
HE (Mockingly)
Every species has one that’s born curious; that wants to explore. Then it leaves and some mutations occur so it’s able to survive, its evolution. Reptiles came from water...’
SHE Bullshit. It must have heard The Voice.
HE (Mockingly)
The voice of evolution.
SHE No. The voice inside saying there’s something wrong. It’s impossible to know what’s wrong, but there is something wrong. It’s saying it doesn’t belong in that place. There is this large being all drawn in, suffocating its potential. It complained, screamed, but people only laughed at the panther’s fury. Then, one day, it gave up.
HE So, now she has identified herself with the panther.
SHE Then the voice started to grow; and it grew and grew until it realized it had to leave that place. It took courage to boldly search for the forest.
HE (Sarcastically)
And it ended in a supermarket, same thing.
They hear a sound, the panther is angry.
34
HE (Anxiously)
What kind of weapon do we have left?
She, looking hypnotized, does not answer. She looks towards the back of the supermarket where the noise is coming from.
HE
Climb on my shoulders, if it thinks we are a larger animal, it’ll be scared off. Animals think about stuff like this.
The panther’s shadow appears.
HE
Quick, climb up, up! He pulls her towards the base. She doesn’t move hypnotized by the shadow.
SHE
(In a trance) It was born in a cage. It’s scared, alone. It has never seen a forest, never left the house. It’s unhappy.
HE Hey, wake up! Do you wanna die?
She doesn’t react and He decides to protect himself: he goes back to the base, closing the entrance with the cart and leaving his fiancée outside
SHE
(Coming out of her trance) So you’d leave me here! You’d be able to do it, I know. You’d never sacrifice yourself for me. I know I’m not marrying any hero, but...
HE Hero? I’m the one who needs to be a hero, but you want to show you’re better then me all the time. You seem to beg to put you in your place.
(Lighting the lighter) And that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to kill this thing, give me the broom.
35
He leaves the base.
SHE
No!
HE Give it to me.
SHE I’m going with you.
HE (Takes the broom out of her hand)
You stay here. You’re taking care of the fort.
He pushes her inside. She falls.
SHE No.
HE Shut up and do as I say. I’m going there, killing the beast and coming back.
SHE Cave man in the flesh!
HE That’s it, cave man.
SHE Come back here!
The Panther’s shadow appears once more.
HE
(Returning to headquarters) Sonofagun, it’s up there. It climbed up an aisle and it’s there, spying on us.
SHE That’s what cats do.
HE Don’t move so it doesn’t feel threatened.
36
Break. They loose themselves in their own thoughts. He lowers his head sadly.
HE
Do you think everyone’s there?
SHE Yes.
HE What do you think there’re doing?
SHE Your grandmother is telling the story of how she met your grandfather. Your mom is calling the Police without telling anyone, pretending everything is okay. My brother...he’s late.
(Sadly) He has an important order this week.
HE Really?
SHE Yeah... a country home close to the city, it’s built around a tree. On top of one, and it has a spiral staircase made of wood.
HE It looks like the Project you made for our house.
SHE One and the same.
HE I don’t understand.
SHE I gave him my project.
HE Why?
SHE Because he is the actual architect, all I do now is create the design for your products.
HE Because you want to.
37
SHE No. What I really wanted to do was build houses.
HE Oh, you’re full of it... You wanted to build houses! Come on, you never know, you’re always unsure; you don’t know what you want.
SHE (Referring to him)
Well, maybe I don’t. Yes, I’m always in doubt.
HE What’s this look you’re giving me? Are you talking about us now?
She nods.
HE Why did you say yes to me then?
SHE Too much work to start over with someone new, there’s not enough time.
He walks out of the base.
HE I know that’s not true.
SHE You don’t take me seriously.
HE This panther is affecting your mind. You are scared.
SHE Oh, so that’s it.
(Changing her tone) Do you think it’s spying on us?
HE I think so, from somewhere up there.
SHE I saw on TV that you must stand sideways to a wild animal. It shows you don’t want to confront it.
He turns sideways to her.
HE Like this?
38
SHE Stand sideways to it.
HE But we don’t know where it is. Your suggestion is useless, totally useless.
SHE Do you have a better one?
Short break.
HE It would be too much work to start over... You know what I’ve just remembered? A dream of yours.
SHE A dream of mine?
HE Hum hum... a dream of yours. The one in which you take me to see your mom at the hospital.
SHE You never met my mother; you’ve got no right to talk about her.
HE It was a very white room, in a very bright day... we were at the foot of the bed; you were trying to introduce me. You kept saying my name, but she wouldn’t answer; she had her face turned to the window and an empty look in her eyes.
SHE Shut up, I did not authorize you to talk about her!
HE Then you lifted the sheets to try and cheer her up... and you noticed she was dead. And it’d been a while because the body was already decomposing. You kept screaming for a nurse, but no one would come. You know why? They hadn’t even noticed she was dead. She was all alone. And you kept crying and crying. And do you know why you kept crying?
SHE Shut up.
HE Because you were afraid you’d end up like her. Alone.
39
In a rage, she starts to undo the base.
SHE
Shut up!
HE (In a warning)
You are breaking our base, calling attentio...
SHE I don’t give a damn!
The panther starts purring.
SHE (To the shadow)
Come, come! I can’t wait anymore!
He tries to hold her.
SHE Don’t touch me!
HE Be still!
He holds her by the shoulders. She stops, out of breath. They stand facing each other. (Break).
SHE
Son of a bitch, you fucked up son of a bitch, you vermin! (Break, He tries to talk, She doesn’t let him)
Vermin! That’s what you are, because that’s what you gave me! A vermin.
HE Huh? What are you talking about?
SHE Why do you think I’m always at Doctor Amapola, hum? It’s because she’s trying to heal me, because you gave me a disease. Your sex thing injected evil bacteria into my uterus.
HE Huh?
40
SHE (Serenely)
Yes... this is serious. Really. I’m being treated. I caught a disease from you. Why do you think we’ve been using condoms?
HE Because you told me you keep forgetting to take the pill!
SHE Of course not. It’s because you gave me a disease.
HE That’s a lie!
SHE Ask Doctor Amapola. My pussy was the healthiest place in the world, until you showed up!
He leaves stage.
SHE
Where are you going?
HE (In off, screaming)
What’s the thing you are most afraid of in the world?
SHE What?
HE (In off, normal voice)
What’s the thing you are most afraid of in the world? (Noise, he’s looking for something)
SHE I don’t know what you are talking about...
(Realizing what he’s going to do) No! Don’t do that!!! Are you mad? It’s...
HE (In off, very serene)
I don’t care... That’s it. Got it. Because I know what scares you more than anything, your worst phobia.
(Small break). The dark.
41
Blackout. She screams at the same time the panther roars. Silence. The red “EXIT” sign lights up. It’s the only light on stage.
ACT II
SCENE 4 – THE TRAP
SHE Turn them back on... Come on! Hurry! I think I’m gonna faint... I’m not feeling well.
(Pulling herself together) Are you stupid? The panther can see much better in the dark than we do! Do you really want me to die?
HE I’m trying...
SHE (Relating “trying” to her dying)
What?
HE I’ve pressed all the switches; the lights won’t come back on!
SHE I hope you feel responsible for my death.
HE I can see a little. I’ll go find us some flashlights. Don’t move.
SHE (Ironically)
I’ll do my best.
She lights a candle.
SHE (Determinedly)
I’ll have to manage by myself.
They speak the following lines to themselves, or to the audience, as if they were talking about their relationship. They do not hear each other.
42
She starts building a trap for the panther. She puts the cart upside down, with the broom supporting its front. She grabs some food and makes a trail with it leading to the trap.
SHE
Look at this, so weird. He throws everything at me as if he’s scoring in a game. What is he trying to win?
He lights a flashlight in the corner.
HE
She's all-‐powerful. At least let her think so.
SHE
He doesn’t take me seriously.
HE She has this neurosis, thinking we are going through a crisis.
SHE He wants to control the situation, but can’t deal with anything.
HE She must calm down and trust me.
SHE He tries to calm things down.
HE She’s always worked up or hysterical and I’m the one that has to keep things in balance. Then she thinks I’m weak.
SHE He’s a coward.
HE What should I do?
SHE He freezes.
43
HE
Start screaming too?
SHE He runs away.
HE Say everything I actually think?
SHE He does not take a stand.
HE So she can use everything I say against me?
Short break.
SHE I only need to feel safe.
HE I only want to make this work.
He opens a bottle of whisky.
SHE I don’t want to be left behind.
He takes a big gulp of whisky.
HE I don’t accept failure.
SHE What if I listen to the voice? And leave...
HE This has to be a partnership.
SHE (Sadly)
Leave end up like it... (Referring to the panther)
Out of place and alone.
44
HE I started this; I’m going to the end.
SHE I can’t handle goodbyes. And there’s nothing poetic about being lonely.
He shines the flashlight on her.
HE I found some flashlights...
SHE Hum.
HE (Offering her some whisky)
Do you want some?
She accepts and drinks. He looks around noticing the trap she set.
HE
What did you do here?
SHE I decided to manage by myself. You can’t do anything right.
HE Don’t start...
SHE It’s true.
HE Then go do things yourself, go. I’m going to the other side of the supermarket. Do it yourself, do it, do everything by yourself. I’m out.
SHE (Holding his arm)
No! Look I set a trap, see. Maybe we can’t fit the whole panther in here, but we can scare it off.
45
HE (With contempt)
You think so, do you?
SHE Whose idea was it to turn off the lights here? At least I did something. That it, leave, dive into the freezer, go. Bye.
HE I’m going far away from you. You are hysterical!
SHE I doubt you’ll leave, coward!
HE (Coming close to her)
You think so?
SHE (Coming close to him and pointing her finger)
You don’t have enough courage to take a single step!
HE Don’t push me...
SHE (Pointing her finger at him, challenging)
You don’t have any courage, no initiative, no strength, no guts, no man...
He pushes her pointing finger away and grabs her.
HE
(Firmly) Shut up.
They make love inside the trap, as far as possible. They’re exhausted when it ends. He’s relaxed; she is hyped up. She gets up.
SHE
Do you think having sex stirs animals up? Makes them more violent?
46
HE
Of course not, come lie here with me.
SHE What do you mean? We completely forgot about the danger.
HE And nothing happened.
SHE Yet.
HE And nothing is going to happen.
SHE It’s not? And how do you know?
HE Because there’s no panther here.
The generator turns the lights on.
47
SCENE 5 – THE GIFT
SHE (Thinking it strange)
Why did the generator only turn on now?
HE It was heating up. Come here, all we need to do is wait until someone shows up.
SHE Have you gone mad?
HE Why?
SHE How can you say there’s no panther here?
HE Cause there isn’t.
SHE Of course there is! You saw it with me! The shadow, the noise!
HE The shadow could’ve been anything, the noise too.
SHE You were scared to death.
HE I was not! Are you out of your mind?
SHE You saw a beast in here!
HE No I didn’t.
SHE There’s a beast in here!
HE No, there isn’t.
SHE I’m so angry with you!
48
She paces the floor nervously. She doesn’t know what to do.
HE
Keep still, soon someone will be here.
SHE I think I’ll let this panther rip off my arm, so you’ll stop saying there’s no beast in here.
HE (Calmly)
Are you out of your mind? I think we should occupy our minds, or else you’ll loose it completely.
SHE Look how calm and serene he is. He took what he wanted, ejaculated it all out of him and the panther is gone.
HE You have to occupy your mind or you’ll go mad.
SHE Hum hum....
HE I’ve had a great idea! Lets organize all the products in this supermarket alphabetically.
SHE (Skeptically)
Alphabetically.
HE It’s good exercise; I can even use it in some project later.
SHE (Sarcastically)
Oh great. A contemporary library, and you suggest we organize them by...what? Type of product, brand, maker...
HE Product’s name! Or is it better by brand?
SHE You tell me.
49
HE I don’t always know what brand I’m buying, so let’s do it by product’s name, the name on the package.
He starts changing the position of products on the shelves.
SHE
Almost a social service for the population.
HE (Disdainfully)
That’s it.
He keeps changing the products. She opens a bag of chips, or chocolate, and starts eating compulsively.
HE
Are you nervous?
SHE Of course I’m nervous, we are trapped in a supermarket with a wild animal, a carnivore, and my fiancé has gone mad.
HE Love...
SHE Has decided to organize the whole supermarket alphabetically.
HE There’s no...
SHE (Pulling herself together)
But I’m not giving up.
She finishes the chips, and throws the bag on the floor.
HE
I’m saying...
SHE I’m not going to alienate myself like you.
50
HE
I don’t think that...
SHE I’m going to do something.
HE (Giving up trying to speak)
Ok...
She picks up a bag of balloons.
SHE
I found our noise.
She grabs a balloon and starts filling it up with air.
HE
(Mocking her a little) You can take some to the party.
SHE (Filling up the balloon)
The party is over.
HE They wouldn’t leave before we showed up.
SHE Your family must have already said a lot bullshit; I do hope they have realized and left.
HE Realized what?
SHE That they are unbearable!
HE Oh, they are unbearable, are they?
SHE Yes. They are. Except for your mom.
51
HE (Trying to hide how angry he is about what she just said)
Stop blowing on that thing. It’s bothering me!
SHE It is?
She blows it strongly.
HE Yes, a lot.
Blows it even more strongly, right in his face. He takes the balloon and bursts it.
HE
You are unbearable!
The shadow of the panther passes by them. She sees it.
SHE
Look there, it’s there. The panther is there!
He crabs a box and throws it far away. The shadow is startled and leaves.
HE
(Spreading his arms victoriously) Did you see that? Did you?
SHE (Sarcastically)
Yeah...I did. Macho man. Are you going to keep saying there’s no panther here?
HE Stop annoying me, love.
He comes down. He smells something.
HE
It smells of piss.
52
SHE I don’t smell anything.
HE It’s a really strong piss smell.
SHE I don’t smell anything.
HE Have you peed your pants?
SHE No.
HE You wanted to go to the bathroom!
SHE I did, but I didn’t go.
HE You peed in your pants!
SHE No. I peed on the floor.
She points to the trap.
HE There? Before or after?
SHE (Taking pleasure in it)
Before, a little before.
HE Come, I’m taking you to the bathroom.
SHE No!
He pulls her by the hair, messing up her hair. She sits on the floor. He tries to drag her. She resists, hugging his legs.
53
SHE I’m not leaving.
She slips one hand up his trousers and pulls the hairs on his legs.
HE
Fuck!
He pulls away from her.
HE Ouch...
SHE I pulled out just two little hairs and look at the crybaby.
HE (Lightly, noticing his own weakness)
Why do this. It really hurts.
Short break.
SHE
(Holding back her rage) You hurt me.
HE Sorry, it’s that pee attracts the panther. And you provoke me, saying bad things about my family.
SHE I really like your mom...
HE I know.
SHE She only has one flaw...
HE Uh?
SHE She didn’t raise her son properly.
54
HE What’s that?
SHE Didn’t teach you the basics. Didn't tell her son to take care of his thing, be clean, use condoms...
HE Shut up.
SHE And what happens? The son gets things on his thing... but doesn’t notice. Why’s that? Because God gave this gift to men, they catch stuff and go years and years without noticing anything. Then, one day, they give it to their wife, that gives it to their son – that is, maybe, it’s not for sure, only if the thing is around when I am giving birth, if my immune system shuts down – which can happen when you are trying to take a human being out of another human being...
HE First, you are not pregnant.
SHE No, I’m not.
HE Secondly, you are not my wife.
SHE Yet.
HE Thirdly: my mom doesn’t like you. She advised me not to propose to you, not to marry you. Are you listening? My mom hates you.
SHE Come on.
HE Why would I make something like this up? She thinks you don’t know what you want. She told me: DO NOT MARRY THIS GIRL. Are you listening?
She can’t digest the information at once. It’s too much for her. She always believed that the love she felt for his mother was reciprocal (she has already lost her mother).
55
During the next lines, it dawns on her that his mother “advised him not to marry her”, while she talks of other things.
SHE
(Swallowing hard) Yes, I am.
The panther utters a nervous sound.
SHE
We are.
The sound stops. She takes the cake, which he had put in the cart at the beginning of the play.
SHE
You said you had a surprise for me. (Pointing to the cake and candle)
Was this it?
HE Today is the forth anniversary of our first kiss, and.. well, I wanted to buy you a cake and candles and make you a surprise...
SHE Hum...
HE And give you a present.
SHE (Not excited)
A present?
HE A necklace. It’s in my pocket.
He takes a jewelry box from his pocket, and opens it. It’s an old necklace, very pretty, with shinny beads.
56
HE It’s a tradition among the women of my family. This necklace belonged to my grandmother, then to my mother…and now…from my mother to you.
SHE Oh.
HE But...
SHE But?
HE I’ll understand it if you don’t want it.
SHE I do.
Break. Now she starts to realize what he said before.
SHE
Was this your mother’s suggestion?
HE (Unsettled)
Yes. She gave it to me when we set the date for the wedding.
SHE (Hurt)
It mustn’t have been easy for her.
HE It was.
SHE (Hurt but angry)
Giving something so special for someone she hates.
HE I may have exaggerated a little...
SHE (Proudly)
I’ll keep the present.
She takes the box from his hand.
57
She turns her back at him. He stares at her as if she was changing her clothes.
SHE
Don’t look at me.
He turns his back to her.
SHE I don’t believe your mother said you shouldn’t marry me. She’s so good to me...
HE We had had a fight, she wanted to show her support, say something like: don’t be upset son; I didn’t even like her anyway; I’m sure there are better women around.
SHE And why didn’t you listen to her? Mothers are always right, you know.
HE It’s easy for someone from the outside to say: “don’t do this, don’t do that.” We have things in common, you and me, we like each other.
SHE (Ironically)
Oh yeah, I love you.
HE This was the worst I love you I’ve ever heard.
SHE Get used to it.
HE What’s that? We are together in this. We work on our problems at home, between us, that’s that.
SHE How am I going to be able to face your mother knowing about this? Tell me.
HE I pitied you, calling her mom...
SHE Pity, you pity me!
She takes off the necklace and throws it far away.
58
HE (Miserably)
I don’t believe you did that...
SHE Well, I did.
HE (Calmly)
Your bluff is unforgivable.
SHE It’s not a bluff.
HE Unforgivable. Everyone has a ‘point of no return.’
SHE Go get it; doesn’t it belong to your family? From grandmother to mother to daughter? Go get it, there, right close to the beast.
HE You go, I’m not a dog. My mom was right about you.
SHE Why don’t you marry her instead?
HE (Silence)
SHE
I hate you.
HE (Silence)
SHE
Oh, I really hate you. Do you want to know how much I hate you?
HE (Silence)
SHE
I hate you so much I would destroy myself just to take you down with me.
59
HE Full of power phrases...
SHE That one is not mine. It’s Gilda’s.
HE (Remembering)
Ah! From the film? Are you comparing yourself with her? Sorry. Your fall is not poetic; your fall is nothing. You can suffer as much as you like, No one is going to notice.
SHE Oh, but you will! You will, because I’m going to make your life hell until you notice how much I am suffering.
She takes his cell phone from her bag, throws it on the floor, and jumps on it smashing the phone.
HE
That does not affect me.
She takes one of his products from the shelf and throws it on the floor.
SHE
This rubbish...
HE That does not affect me.
SHE (Screaming at him)
Ahhhh!
HE That does not affect me dear.
SHE I hate your products!
60
HE That does not hurt me because I hired you out of pity...
SHE You hired me because you need a wife-‐secretary, someone that represents you, a face for the couple… a wife that improves your image to society.
HE I hired you because you don’t know what you want. I did you a favor. Until you decide what you want. Something you are never going to do, which is a decision in itself.
SHE I am.
HE You have qualities, don’t take this badly, but you don’t know how to use any of them for anything.
SHE Is that so?
HE What would you do without me?
SHE That’s exactly what I could find out by myself!
HE (Mumbling to himself)
Happiness is not a priority of yours, and I make the most of it.
They hear a peculiar sound. It’s the Panther crying. They are silent for some time, listening to the cry. It is sad and strong.
HE
I think it’s crying.
SHE It happened about ten years ago.
HE What are you talking about?
61
SHE
(Slowly) I was at a restaurant by myself. It was a small town in the country. I sat at a table facing the mountain, already tired of not having anyone to talk to. Then I saw a cage hanging over me, inside it a yellow bird. It was so cute, but had this forlorn look in the eyes anyone would think it heartbreaking. At least it broke my heart, both of us alone.
The sound of the panther walking around itself, as if it was in its cage.
SHE
I couldn’t control myself. I opened the cage; the birdie put its little head out for a peep. When it noticed it was free, it flew. Flapping its wings to scare boredom away, using all harnessed energy, all might of freedom; it flew quickly, like a jet, straight into the glass door, and fell dead on the floor.
HE It’s walking round and round.
SHE Who me?
HE No, the panther, listen...
SHE Hum.
The sound gets louder.
HE A habit learned in the cage.
SHE Everyone gets used to something.
HE Yes they do.
The lights come on – the same white light from the beginning of the play. The door opens.
HE
Finally!
62
SHE
What now?
HE Now we go home.
SHE Do you think it can survive out here by itself...
HE No, it can’t survive.
He reaches for her hand.
They leave the supermarket hand in hand.
She returns looking for something. Finding it, she bends down and takes the necklace that is lying on the floor.
She puts the necklace on.
She looks straight ahead.
Blackout.