The Miami Valley SchoolNovember 29th, 2012Scott Ervin, M. Ed.www.askthekidwhisperer.com

Skill #1Neutralizing Arguing

Follow these easy steps!1) Go brain dead2) Use your one-liner3) Do not attempt to think!!!!4) Make an appointment

Love and Logic is a way of interacting with children that • is easier than what you are doing now • is less stressful• gives you enormous power •makes it unnecessary to yell• gives you more time to cook/ read/watch TV/ play video games/ go the movies/ think•makes it extremely difficult for kids to be non-compliant•makes kids feel empowered and happy• also works on your spouse

The Four Foundations of Love and Logic• The self concept and dignity of both

child and adult must be maintained at all costs.• The child must feel that he has some

control.• The child must do more thinking than

the teacher.• After empathy is locked in, logical

consequences are used instead of punishment.

The Love and Logic Response Test

•Did my response maintain my own dignity and self concept as well as the dignity and self concept of the child?•Did my response put the problem squarely on the shoulders of the child?

Kids exhibit behaviors that work

for them.

• If I argue long enough, I might get my way• If I don’t get my way, arguing is still a

good way to get an entertaining laser-light show of adult frustration and anger• If I can control adults, I must be more

powerful than adults• Since I’m more powerful than adults, I

don’t have to listen to them• Being nasty is the best way to get

what I want

When you argue with a child,

YOU ARE BEING MANIPULATED!!!!

Other One-liners• I know.• Thanks for sharing.• Probably so.•Nice try.• That’s an option.•Hmmmmm.•Bring the robot ruckus to me.