The Howling Wilderness

Newsletter The Witness08 March 2008

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The Howling Wilderness…He found him in a desert land,

and in the waste land,a howling wilderness;He encircled him,He instructed him,

He kept him as the apple of his eye. (Deut 32:10) KJV

Who did the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob find in thewilderness? Who did He send back to his own people to leadthem out of Egypt? Moses was born in Egypt. King Pharaohheard from His astrologers that a deliverer was born andtried to kill the deliverer of Israel. After 40 years of living inthe King’s palace, Moses became an Egyptian. He alwaysremembered the calling on his life. He, in an attempt tofulfill the prophecy for his life, killed an Egyptian. This didnot turn out as he had expected. He had to flee and went tolive in Median. Here he married and forgot about the call onHis life. Although he was a highly literate and skilled man hebecame an ordinary shepherd tending sheep for 40 years. Itwas during one of his days in the dessert that God called hishumbled man, whose dreams has been shattered 40 yearsago.

Most of the men of God who had been called by God werecalled after it seemed that those plans that they had dreamtof had died and became ashes. Consider Joseph, who weresold and rejected by his own brothers. He was even thrownin prison for more than two years. Even Abraham had to giveup the dream which God had given him. Only after 22 yearsof waiting for the promise of God did God give him the son ofpromise.

Those First Years

On the 4th of July 2000 I had a dream. This dream wouldbe the beginning of a path of finding the Father of our LordJesus Christ, His Son and the Holy Spirit.

Up until that day, I only knew the Lord in an impersonalway. Although I knew Him from the time I was a boy andhad basically grown up going to church every Sunday. I stilldid not know Him as a personal and living God.

In the year 1991, while studying as a student in Engineeringat the University of Pretoria, the Lord, through another veryradical group of students, started reeling me in again. For 8years I was in an evangelical church. Here I learnt manythings, which would lead to my growth in the knowledge ofthe word of God. I also learnt many other things which werenot correct biblically. I lived a very legalistic lifestyle, forwhich I would give up my life and in that way also preventmyself from growing in the business sector. I learnt the goodwith the bad. After two years of being a part of this ministry Ibecame a leader. I was not a natural leader and even fearedresponsibility. I was given the responsibility of mentoringand discipling 5 younger disciples. We strongly held to whatwe called the Jethro-principle. The entire church was dividedinto a network of people who were taught by those underthem. As a matter of fact the whole world was divided intothis amazing top-down structure. You were not allowed todate or marry a girl from another denomination. I was fullyconvinced that this was how it was suppose to be.

After about 5 years I became a zone leader. I was responsiblefor 3 - 4 little cells. I was responsible for about thirty people’sspiritual well being. The accountability was strict and harsh.We had to meet people every day and share our faith withthem. We had to teach them and make them into disciples.This was a continues process, which slowly made my heartbecome hard and stale. I used to explain it like this: “Thewater was still coming out of the water hose, but the tap hadlong ago being closed!” It was only a matter of time when the“disciple” found out he was not doing all these things forGod, but for man.

I started challenging leadership. I was once even used as anexample as a revolutionist for Christ, but even this could notchange this large organization. I attempted to change thesystem, but only found myself getting discouraged andangered.


The Witnesses of the Lord Jesus ChristSouth Africa, Pretoria

[email protected] & www.witnessesforjesuschrist.co.za

This letter was written as a witness to the Lord Jesus Christ so that by all possible means God’s people will be prepared for the works of service to which He has called them. Proclaim His coming,for His coming is soon at hand. (1 Cor 9:1-27) Please send this letter to as many others so that they may be blessed. This letter may be copied, but all rights are reserved as revealed from the Lord

Jesus Christ and those ministries mentioned. Therefore give Glory to whom Glory belong.- 2 -

But I did learn some awesome things from that group ofpeople. I learnt what commitment to Jesus Christ meant.Yes, even commitment to death. I also learnt commit to savethe lost. From the time I started in 1991 to the time I left in1999, that denomination had planted churches all over SouthAfrica and the world. Looking back, those few zealous“disciples” planted one church in every country in the worldfrom 1979 to the year 2000. They grew from 30 disciples to250 000 people, having a church in nearly every large city inthe world. And to crown all of this, they never knew aboutthe power and leading of the Holy Spirit.

I Will Draw You

No man can come to me,except the Father which hath sent me draw him:(John 6:44) KJV

I had lived under the most zealous and yet most hurt people.After 8 years I became despondent and fell into a deepdepression. I had given up all that I had in order to live forthe Lord Jesus Christ, but all seemed empty and futile. I hadgrown lonely and lost in this maze of religion and knowledgeof the Lord and His word. Was God dead or have I justmissed it? Still fully convinced what I was taught was thetruth, I tore myself away from the only “truth” I knew at thatstage of my life. I even believed that I was losing mysalvation leaving this church.

For six months I would not think about religion, andwouldn’t allow my mind to wander to those things of Godwhich had made me miserable.

It was during that time – even in my sin, as I opposed God,that I knew that He alone had the answers. Where do youstart to search in this maze of religion? I had come to knowmany different denominations and what they believed. I hadto, because I had to know their weaknesses and theirdoctrines in order to convert them to become “disciples” inmy denomination.

I was reminded of one particular church and its people. Ihave heard of some one who once said that the Lord Jesus

had led him to our house – even though I never told him howto get to our place. Could it be? Could it be possible to stillhear the God of the Old Testament speak to man?

Up until that time I was convinced that only the apostles andtheir closest followers would experience those wonderfulthings, but were convinced it had stopped when the bible waswritten. I used to believe that the gifts of the Holy Spiritcame only to usher in the coming of the kingdom of God andto start the church of Jesus Christ on the earth. I was alsofully convinced that the purpose of the gifts of the Holy Spiritwas fulfilled and we would therefore have no more need forthem anymore. I even strongly oppose anyone who wouldbelieve they were speaking in tongues, saying that they madeit up. The sad part was that those who were considered to befrom the Pentecostal denominations couldn’t prove from thescripture that I was wrong. I found them to have a greatinability to use the scriptures.

It is true that God opposes or frustrates the proud, but givesgrace to the humble (James 4:6). Finally I was willing tolisten to those whom I have refused to listen to. I visited avery small church. The first day I walked into the church oneof the pastors met me and said: “I can see that you have beenvery hurt by the church!” I thought to myself: “Is it thatevident that everybody could see it written on my face?” Itwas only later that this pastor would tell me how he, themoment he saw me, had seen a vision of a glass box with alarge label written over it: “FRAGILE!” God told him that Iwas fragile and broken by religion. This vision gave him thewisdom to help me. Praise God who can still today reveal thesecrets of our hearts.

It was during this time, in this small church, that I had adream. I was studying the word of God in order to find thetruth about the Holy Spirit. That same night, the Lordappeared to me in a dream:

I had a dream consisting of different parts: In the firstdream: I saw a large, black, shiny spider, coming out of theroof, directly above the place which I was sitting. I was afraidand thought to myself: “I will crush this spider, hitting it witha pillow!” But deep on the inside of me, some one told me






not to be afraid, but to allow this spider to climb on top of

me. I obeyed this voice, but turned my back towards thespider. I imagined how this ugly, black spider, would get onmy back. I could feel shivers going down my back.

In the second dream: While I was driving in my father's oldkombi, I was playing with a small rugby ball. Suddenly, theball fell out of the Kombi. Although it was night time, I couldsee the rugby ball bounced on the sand. It rolled until it cameto a stand still. I made the driver stop in order to go andfetch the ball. As I approached the ball, it started bouncingagain. I was greatly surprised. It seemed like this ball washostile to me, spinning sand into my eyes. Again somethingdeep within me told me that this was demonic. I rebuked theball in the Name of Jesus. It stopped immediately!

At that same moment, I heard music coming out of heaven. Ilooked up and saw a soft yellow light shining through thedarkness. I expected to see angels coming out of heaven. As Ilooked I saw the golden outline of a priest in the night sky?When I saw Him I knew who He was. It was the Holy Spirit. Ihad mixed feelings. I was skeptical and yet longed for him inmy life. Without being able to resist Him, He drew me toHim, up into the air. I lifted from the ground, unable totouch the ground. Suddenly, we swirled around one another.He around me I around Him. (Deut 32:10) It was as if wewere doing a love dance in the heavens. As we were twirling

around one another, the Priest changed into a Father. Hishand touched my hand. At that moment I felt the texture ofHis hand. He had large hands, like that of a hard workingman, full of callousses. His hand reminded me of my father’shand. When His hand touched my hand, I experienced thelove of the Father flowing through me. Then, with thegreatest dearness, concern and compassion, He said myname. I woke up weeping because of the Love which theFather has for me!

A week later an old friend interpreted this dream to me: Iused to be in a denomination which opposed the Holy Spirit,because of their ignorance. This caused me to be suspiciousand skeptical towards the Gift of the Holy Spirit. But Godwas drawing me to Himself. He was drawing me with cordsof love that no man can break. He drew me even beyond myunderstanding and pre-conceived ideas. God overcame allmy fears and ignorance.

The Wilderness...What do you consider a wilderness? A term more relatable tome and you is a maze. Have you ever been lost in the city onyour way to some place? Have you felt that feeling ofconfusion and being misguided or being deceived?

Most people who love God have become frustrated, becausethe word of God doesn’t seem to work anymore. You heardabout miracles and healings, but the fact is, you don’t reallysee them materialize in your life. This is what Jesus told usabout 2000 years ago: "And because lawlessness will beincreased, the love of the many will be made cold. (Mat24:12) KJV

Because of many things the love of many has grown cold.People have been appalled by religion and anything which isconnected with Christianity and God. This was also whatPaul has prophesied would happen: that in the last daysperilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of theirown selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers,disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without naturalaffection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce,despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;






Having a form of godliness, but denying the powerthereof: from such turn away. (2Ti 3:1-5) KJV

The Holy Spirit told Paul though people would be religious,they would not have the true power of God. Many are servingGod with good intentions, but have grown tired of trying andhave given up along the way. They have said like Gideon oncesaid: “Where is the God who led the Israelites through thered sea?” Are these only stories which happened for a chosenremnant and would never occur again? Or even worse: “Maybe there is no God!” Over 80% of Europe has given God up asa myth. No wonder the crusaders killed people in the nameof religion. Jesus also warned that this would happen: But anhour is coming that every [one] having killed you shall think[he is] offering sacred service to God. (John 16:2b) Manyhave done atrocious deeds in the name of religion. So muchso, that those who do want to follow Jesus Christ, do notknow where to turn to anymore.

We have something like 2000 different denominations inChristian religion alone. If I was a Muslim I would not knowmy left arm from my right. By the way: Muslim means:“Devoted to God!” But which one?

A Perfect Religion…In my search for the truth I stopped saying who is right, butwhat is right! You will always find some one to agree withyou, but who will agree with God? After many years ofexperience with different denominations I finally decided tostart my own church.

That same night I had a dream: I was in the sea anddiscovered a beautiful ship which sank many hundreds ofyears ago. I saw the magnificent wood work of this, once,master of the seas. The ship was perfectly suspended in thewater. It neither sank nor appeared above the surface of thewater. I considered myself blessed to have been able tostumble upon this awesome treasure. I reached out my handto touch this ship. I must have just touched it, when itimmediately lost its perfect suspension in the water andstarted to sink deeper into the sea. I watched as this ship,which was perfectly persevered for hundreds of years,

crashed into the ocean bottom, breaking up into thousandsof pieces, because I touched it.

I was once told. If you are looking for a perfect church doshould not join any church, because then it would not beperfect anymore. This not to say that we can not question thethings which are taught in church, but it is the attitude withwhich you do it. In the book of Acts God referred to a noblepeople: These were more noble than those in Thessalonica,in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, andsearched the scriptures daily, whether those thingswere so. (Act 17:11) KJV

We are allowed to test any man words to see if what they aresaying is from God. If the Bereans were concidered noble inGod’s eyes for searching the scripture, to see if what Paulsaid was true, we should also test what any teacher of thescriptures teaches.

The Perfect Balance..We often learn the most basic lessons in the most interestingplaces. I had experienced both sides of the coin. I have beenpart of an Evangelical church for 8 years and after that Ihave been part of a Charismatic church for another 4 yearsand after that a Pentacostal church for another 4 years. Oneday while showering, as I was speaking to the Lord JesusChrist about those things, which had happened over a periodof 8 years, I turned around in the shower and bumped theshower tap. Suddenly I was standing in an ice cold shower. Itwas at that moment that the Holy Spirit spoke to me saying:“Just like this water is to cold to shower and just as it wouldbe impossible to shower in seering hot water the water needto be set in balance in order to be able to shower. So in thesame way if a church is foccused only on the cold hard factsof the word of God or are only focussed on the spiritual itwould be a religion without balance. God is not looking for achurch who are so super spiritual that they are no earthlygood, neither is He looking for a church who are like theteachers of the law laying heavy burderns on people’sshoulders, but not lifting a finger to lighten the burden onthe disciples necks. Of them the words that Jesus said is true:Ye blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel.Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For ye






make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, butwithin they are full of extortion and excess. (Mat 23:24-25)KJV

But rather Jesus said this: “"So having gone, learn what it is,what this means, 'I desire mercy and not sacrifice,' for I didnot come to call righteous [people], _but_ sinners torepentance." [Hosea 6:6] (Mat 9:13) ALT

And:

"Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, because I amgentle and humble in heart, 'and you will find rest for yoursouls. "For My yoke [is] easy, and My burden is light." Mat11:29-30 ALT The true word of God has both power and setsus free.

Since the time of the apostles many wolves has come to leadmany disciples after them. The Word was not available to allpeople and was written in a languege which the ordinaryman could not understand. But since the time of MartinLuther this was changed and restored. A great revelution ofthe truths of the Word of God started being restored. Sincethe later 1600’s many truths started being re-discovered.Individuals all over the world who devoted themselves toseeking God found great revelations.

The sad truth is that many of these individuals in thereignorance and selfishness thought that they were the onlyones who were right. In many ways we can not blame themfor feeling like they did. For they all had some new revelationwhich would change the way that we would understand Godand his character.

Since the discovery of the dead sea scrolls many more truthshad been revealed which went missing during the times ofthe translation of the scriptures. But God’s own word has theanswer to the interpreation of the Holy scriptures: Knowingthis first, that no prophecy of the scripture is of any privateinterpretation. For the prophecy came not in old time bythe will of man: but holy men of God spake as they weremoved by the Holy Ghost. (2Pe 1:20-21) KJV

Thus through only mere study of the scriptures no man willbe able to fully comprehend the deep truths of God’s word.God said once through the Holy Spirit: "And He made fromone blood every nation of human beings to be living on allthe face of the earth, having designated times having beenappointed [for them] and the boundaries of their habitation,[in order for them] to be seeking the Lord, if perhaps theymight grope for Him and find [Him], and yet He is not farfrom each one of us. (Act 17:26-27) ALT

Are We Now so Foolish...Paul said to the Galatians: You are so foolish! Having begunin [or, by] [the] Spirit, are you now being completed [or,perfected] in [or, by] the flesh? (Gal 3:3) ALT

We should pray and ask God what is the interpretation of ascripture. This is especially true when it comes to theinterpretation of the prophecies about the things to come.Only God knows the end from the beginning. Why not askHim the interpretation to the scriptures also. If Daniel couldask God the interpretation to the King Nebuchadnezzar’sdream, why can’t we also ask God His personal opinion? Didnot John the apostle say: These things I wrote to youconcerning the ones leading you astray [fig., deceivingyou]. And the anointing which you received from Himabides in you. And you have no need that anyone should beteaching you, but as that same anointing teaches youconcerning all [things], and is true and is not a lie, andjust as it taught you, you will abide in Him. (1Jn 2:26-27)ALT

Why do we not allow the Anointing to teach us the truthabout the word of God?

Personally I believe many denominations and churches eachone has a piece of the puzzle. God has allowed each one todiscover a piece of the truth. We should all learn from oneanother and not be critical of another saying: “I have theperfect doctrine!”

I am Standing at the Door Knocking...Be humble and be willing to acknowledge that I might notknow it all. Make room for God to show you His truth and






character through another brother or sister who do notbelieve what you believe. Be open to learn. Be willing to saycould be wrong and remember, even the prophets didn’tunderstand everything: Of which salvation the prophetshave enquired and searched diligently, whoprophesied of the grace that should come unto you:Searching what, or what manner of time the Spirit ofChrist which was in them did signify, when ittestified beforehand the sufferings of Christ, and theglory that should follow. (1Pe 1:10-11) KJV

God will find those in this wilderness of confusion if you willonly earnestly seek him in humillity.

Love in Christ our Lord

From the directors “The Witness”

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The Howling Wilderness