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The effects of rape upon victimsand families: Implications for acomprehensive family therapyJeffery Scott Mio a & Jacqueline D. Foster aa Washington State UniversityPublished online: 13 Jun 2007.

To cite this article: Jeffery Scott Mio & Jacqueline D. Foster (1991) The effects of rape uponvictims and families: Implications for a comprehensive family therapy, The American Journal ofFamily Therapy, 19:2, 147-159, DOI: 10.1080/01926189108250844

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THE EFFECTS OF RAPE UPON VICTIMS AND FAMILIES: IMPLICATIONS FOR A

COMPREHENSIVE FAMILY THERAPY

IEFFERY SCOTT MI0 and IACQUELlNE D. FOSTER

For a number of years, rape has been the subject of much discussion in the clinical literature. Family therapists have joined in this discus- sion; howezw, examination of the literature reveals that on ly the fani- ily-of-origin or the spouse of the rape victim is considered. ’Given the social problem of rape and the potential effect this act of violence mixht have upon a family, attention should be given to a version of family thcrapy that includes yiiuns children. This artzcle examines 1iteratii;e on rape and related issues, offering p.delines to family therapists for a corn prehensive family therapy .

For years the rape literature ignored the rape victim (Burgess & Holms- trom, 1974), focusing instead on the rapist or on the settings in which rape occurs. A needed shift of attention to the rape victim’s reactions and life adjustments surfaced, primarily due to the advent of the feminist movement. Presently, therefore, the literature is rich in articles dealing with the victim and trying to raise the collective consciousness of a myth- dominated public. Unfortunately, the literature is almost entirely lacking articles on families’ reactions to the rape of a mother. Being part of a family system, children are affected by changing boundaries that occur after the incident of rape. The present paper addresses this issue of family adjustment and provides guidelines for therapists using a systems ap- proach. Although we recognize that children, adolescents, and men may also fall victim to rape, the focus of this article will be on the rape of a mother of an intact family.

REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE

In order to address the issue of a rape’s effect upon the family system, one must have an understanding of a rape’s effect upon the individual.

Both authors are at Washington State University. Appreciation is extended to John Constantine, Antonia Meltzoff, Patricia Braden, and Cindy Hattabaugh for their assist- ance on earlier drafts of this paper. Send correspondence to: Jeffery Scott Mio, Ph.D., Department of Psychology, Washington State University, Pullman, WA 99164-4820.

The American Journal of Family Therapy, Vol. 19, No. 2, 1991 0 BrunneriMazel, Inc.

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148 The American Journal of Family Therapy, Vol. 19, No. 2, Summer 1991

Once the individual’s reactions and needs are understood, a clearer pic- ture of the family imbalance may be seen.

Myths About Rape

Myths about rape have been well documented (e.g., Burge, 1983; Pe- pitone-Rockwell, 1978). These myths range from considering rape as a primarily sexual act to blaming the victim for its occurrence. Although there has been a great deal of effort to educate the public about the fallacy of such ideas, they still seem to be widely held (Burge, 1983).

Perhaps the most damaging myth of all was established by readers of Freud. Deutch (1944), in particular, advocated and extended Freud’s no- tion that women fantasize about being raped. She contended that women are themselves responsible for rape, acting out fantasies shared by all healthy, normal women. Notman and Nadelson (1976), however, have tried to make a distinction between the fantasy of rape and the reality of rape. They recognize the fact that many psychiatrists view victims as acting out their own fantasies, thus not being ”true victims,” but support the defeat of this notion. At any rate, many still hold onto the myth that the woman is at fault to some degree, so rape has been stigmatized as shameful for the victim. As a reaction to this stigma, women frequently feel guilty and are shamed into silence.

The feminist viewpoint sees rape as a long-standing, culturally con- doned expression of man’s dominance over woman (Albin, 1977; Brown- miller, 1975; Metzger, 1976; Russell, 1975). Metzger draws from her own experience as a rape victim, the testimony of other women, and the historical glorification of rape dating back to Ancient Greek mythology to portray society as the attacker: “Today most rapes are forced entrance by a stranger. The stranger is anyone. Simply a hand emerging from the shadows. Being anyone, the rapist is everyone” (p. 406).

Vinsel (1977) sees the feminist position as useful in combatting the zeitgeist of thought established at least since the time of Freud. Part of the reason for the persistence of myths is that they seem to maintain a useful purpose. She described this utility of myths:

1) Rape is a small problem (since there are only a few genuine sex-perverts; 2) nothing can or should be done to prevent rape (since there will always be maniacs and nothing can be done to prevent some of them from raping); and 3) if a male forces intercourse on a female against her will, he is comfortably free of worry that he might be a rapist (since rapists are crazy and he knows he is not). (p. 185)

Reactions of Victims

Southerland and Sheryl (1970) wrote one of the earliest essays on the reactions of rape victims. They identified three phases: an acute phase, outward adjustment, and integration and resolution. In phase one, the

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Effects of Rape Upon Victims and Families 149

victim feels shock, disbelief, and dismay. She cannot believe that the incident actually happened to her. In phase two, there is an outward adjustment; the acute phase seems to have been resolved. However, the resolution is not complete because the victim relies on denial and suppres- sion as defense mechanisms. Anger and resentment, particularly, are suppressed, perhaps due to social sanctions against these emotions in women. As a consequence, victims remain silent, their anger brooding inside. In phase three, there is a complete integration and resolution of the incident. Depression usually sets in, the victim feels a need to talk to resolve feelings. Thus, after a certain length of time, depression and the need to talk are expected and are seen as positive signs in the res- olution of rape. The therapist and the victim’s support systems (especially her family) should be aware of this reaction, patient with her depression, and receptive to her need to talk.

Burgess and Holmstrom have written an influential and informative series of articles (Burgess & Holmstrom, 1974, 1976, 1979; Holmstrom & Burgess, 1975). Their 1974 article identified, defined, and labeled the Rape Trauma Syndrome (RTS), which has more recently been subsumed under the general label of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD; Amer- ican Psychiatric Association, 1981, 1987). RTS is, of course, precipitated by a rape, which is defined by the authors as a forcible, violent penetra- tion. The syndrome includes an acute phase of disorganization of the victim’s lifestyle, and a long-term process of reorganization of her life- style. Characteristics of the acute phase include somatic disturbances, such as muscular tension, sleep disturbance, and genito-urinary discom- fort, plus various emotional reactions. The long-term process of adjust- ment includes the changing of address, seeking family and professional support, and dealing with repetitive nightmares and phobias.

Psychoanalytically oriented therapists have written about rape from a less accusatory stance in recent years (e.g., Juda, 1985; Notman & Na- delson, 1976; Symonds, 1976). Symonds has focused upon the victim’s regression to “psychological infantilism” during a rape attack. In psy- chological infantilism, the victim is “frozen” to the point of nonresistance; its roots are seeded in profound primal terror. Symonds recounts nu- merous cases where the victims were in fear of their lives and could not resist the advances of the assailant. This behavior might appear to be cooperation on the part of the victim, but Symonds makes it clear that the overwhelming thought in the victims‘ minds was to escape the sit- uation alive.

Notman and Nadelson (1976) have further delineated the dynamic point of view in describing the reactions of rape victims. First, there is a period of anger, which is usually suppressed (again in part due to cultural sanctions against women displaying anger), so it is transformed into guilt, self-blame, or identification with the aggressor. It may also be expressed symbolically, as in nightmares, explosive outbursts, or dis- placement. Second, guilt and shame are universal reactions, despite the fact that the victim may have done everything to avoid the incident. Third, the victim questions her ability to control her unconscious, ag-

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150 The American Journal of Family Therapy, Vol. 19, No. 2, Summer 1991

gressive, or masochistic desires. This reaction of questioning her defen- sive ability arises because of the actuality of rape and must be resolved in order for the victim to feel that she has regained control of her life.

Selkin (1978) administered the California Personality Inventory and the Cornell Medical Index to 32 rape victims and 23 resisters. He found numerous differences between the two populations. In summary, he found that the pattern of differences would indicate that resisters were more likely to respond with anger and rage and mobilize these reactions against the assailant, whereas victims tended to feel helpless and expe- rience mental and physical paralysis. Moreover, resisters seemed to be more adept at handling societal situations and tended to be more asser- tive.

Selkin’s results would imply that psychological androgeny (e.g., Bem, 1974, 1981) is important. Healthy personalities should include some traits traditionally considered male and some traits traditionally considered female, regardless of gender. Women should not be afraid to get angry, nor should they defer being assertive. The feminist position that women have the right of equal status to men would also seem to be correct. Starting from an equal power base, women can have the confidence to protect their territory and themselves, similar to that traditionally felt by men. This suggestion will not, of course, eliminate all incidents of rape. However, individuals possessing androgenous traits are more likely to engage in coping strategies, which will contribute to adjustment after the rape.

Reactions of Siynificant Others

Silverman (1978) has documented the reactions of spouses and family members to rape. However, “family members” refers only to the parents and adult siblings of the victim. This tradition has been followed by subsequent authors (e.g., Burge, 1983; White & Rollins, 1981). For ex- ample, although Burge begins her chapter with an anecdote about the horror a husband and a daughter experienced when the wife/mother entered their home bloodied from a rape attack, the author did not return to the reaction of children in the body of the chapter-this despite the fact that Burge identified both the husband and the child as covictiins of the rape. Nevertheless, information about family reactions is important in getting a feel for the victim’s support system.

According to Silverman (1978), husbands react more to the sexual as- pects of the rape than to the violent nature of the act. These reactions are inevitably linked with feelings of resentment and anger toward the victim and are often expressed indirectly. The therapist should tactfully bring these feelings out into the open. This will result in a far greater control of the feelings and prevent potentially damaging covert or mixed communication between the spouses. The degree to which a husband is able to discuss his feelings will depend upon the quality of the marriage before the rape, so the therapist must first ascertain that quality. Explo-

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Effects of Rape Upon Victims and Families 151

ration of feelings may be more effective in individual sessions with the husband. Such sessions may protect him from potentially damaging expressions of feelings toward his wife and also allow him the frcedom to express the full magnitude of his anger.

Another reaction a spouse may have is feeling a personal attack upon his ”property.” He might feel that his wife has been ”tainted” in some way and does not possess the same value she once did. This can only have adverse effects upon their sexual and marital relations. All o f the emotions associated with this reaction might lead to the wife feeling humiliated and devalued. Therapists might counteract this point of view by focusing upon the sense of hurt suffered by the husband and juxta- posing it with the sense of hurt felt by anyone when a loved one suffers any kind of trauma. It should be reframed for the husband that his ”prop- erty’’ was not damaged, but a loved one was violated. While it is im- possible to forget an incident such as rape, i t is not impossible to go on living a full, rich life. The frustration expressed by the husband may grow out of feelings of shared devaluation and shame, so the therapist must be sensitive to this. By emphasizing the shared aspect of the trauma, the therapist is suggesting to the husband that he is his wife’s primary source of emotional support and that there is a common goal to overcome. Silverman’s observations have been corroborated by others (e.g., Earl, 1985; Rodkin, 1982). For example, Rodkin identified two phases through which men pass after the rape of their respective partners. In the first phase, there is an external locus of control. They feel a need for revenge, anger is directed outwardly, etc. In the second phase, individual or per- sonalized feelings are more apparent. These feelings include guilt, anger, and jealousy.

Hertz and Lerer (1981) emphasize the difficulty of getting beyond the tendency to blame wives for the rape. For example, wives may be seen as willing participants, for not putting up greater resistance, or for being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Miller (1982) points out that certain marital problems may be caused by the rape, or that preexisting problems may become exacerbated. These problems include communication dif- ficulties, sexual dysfunctions and related problems, and lack of under- standing or patience.

Families, according to Silverman (1978), may experience the same feel- ings of helplessness, shock, rage, or physical revulsion that are experi- enced by the victim. Families often attempt to incorporate the help o f various support systems (such as clergy, teachers, friends, therapists). If these attempts occur too soon after the incident, victims might view them as impinging upon their right to privacy. The metacommunication from the families is that the victims do not know what is best for them- selves or are too weak or confused to know what to do.

Families often try to protect victims by moving them to areas they could not afford before, to a new city, or back home, or by providing door-to-door chauffeuring service. These attempts may serve to reinforce the victims’ already existing feelings of helplessness and prevent them

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from using their own, optimal coping strategies. Other attempts at dis- traction, such as trips, group activities, and shopping sprees, have similar consequences. These attempts, although useful for some, are not useful for all, and can serve to deny the event.

At times, victims are discouraged from disclosing the rape to “protect” other family members from being traumatized; this is especially true with respect to ”protecting” children. The rape thus becomes a “secret” among those who know about the incident. Keeping rape a secret may serve to block adaptive coping strategies, causing maladaptive strategies to be employed. This process adds stress to the family system and greater dysfunctions may result (Boss & Greenberg, 1984). To avoid such stress, we strongly recommend that family therapists allow an open discussion of the fact that a crime was committed against the mother. All members of the family need to be involved in the healing process.

Coping Strafe@ uf Victims

Burgess and Holmstrom (1976) identified three general coping strate- gies used by victims of rape: cognitive assessment, verbal tactics, and physical action. In all cases, the rape incident was seen as seriously taxing the adaptive resources of the victims. Cognitive assessrrzerzt involves the determination of possible responses, such as escape, keeping the assail- ant calm, and so forth. It involves a logical plan of action on the part of the victim. Verbal tactics include stalling, talking about an erroneous topic, reasoning with the assailant, trying to gain sympathy, flattering, bar- gaining, feigning illness, threatening, changing the assailant’s perception of the victim, joking, and sarcasm. Physical action involves the fight-or- flight dimension, As Symonds (1976) ‘indicates, however, due to psy- chological infantilism, these alternatives may not be available to many victims at the time of attack. Burgess and Holmstrom (1976) suggest that the therapist should reframe any behavior on the part of the victim as a sign that she was able to do something-anything-in the face of an extremely stressful situation.

In a later study, Burgess and Holmstrom (1979) followed u p 81 rape victims 4-6 years after the incident and looked at the strategies used to adapt to life after the rape. They found that women who had generally good self-esteem recovered more quickly than those who did not. Al- though directionality was not distinguishable, and undoubtedly recovery and self-esteem are transactionally linked, the therapeutic implications of this finding are twofold: 1) therapists should emphasize strengths of the victim; and 2) therapists should encourage an awareness of a feminist orientation about feeling good about oneself.

Burgess and Holmstrom also found that conscious, cognitive defense mechanisms of explanation, minimization, suppression, and dramati- zation seemed to be useful, healthy ways to cope. Of the 21 women who had not recovered at the time of the follow-up, only 5 had used any type of conscious defense mechanisms. A further useful strategy of coping was increased action (as compared with no change or decreased action).

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Effects of Rape Upon Victims and Families 153

This is most likely due to the women feeling that they can still lead rich lives. None of the victims who recovered within a month of the rape (as compared with those who recovered years after and those who had not recovered at all) attempted suicide or abused drugs or alcohol. Nine of the 21 who had not recovered (43%) tried one or more of these mala- da p tive coping strategies.

1NTEGRATION OF RAPE WITH FAMILY THERAPY ISSUES

A s we discussed in the previous section, the family therapy literature does not mention including the entire family in treatment. We speculate that this lack is caused by these authors’ unwitting belief in rape myths. Traditionally, family theorists have made a distinction between the mar- ital subsystem and the parental subsystem (e.g., Carter & McGoldrick, 1988; Hoffman, 1981; Minuchin, 1974). One topic typically reserved for the marital subsystem has been sex. If writers on rape have implicitly considered rape as a sexual act as opposed to a violent assault, children will naturally be excluded from the intervention. Such a diversion of focus has not been evidenced in the domain of violent assault (e.g., Eth & Pynoos, 1985; Malmquist, 1986; Pynoos et al., 1987; Pynoos & Nader, 1988). Instead, much attention has been paid to the potential post-trau- matic stress children may suffer after witnessing violent attacks. These researchers have warned therapists to address immediately the needs of such child witnesses to prevent long-term negative effects. Granted, a nonwitnessed rape of the mother would have more subtle effects upon a child than a witnessed brutal attack, such as the murder of a parent (Malmquist, 1986) or fatal shootings on a school playground (Pynoos et al., 1987). However, even a nonwitnessed attack has significant effects, which need to be addressed if a comprehensive family therapy treatment is to be devised. Three lines of research are relevant to our extrapolation of family therapy to include children: 1) the literature dealing with chil- dren’s responses to nebulous threats; 2) the literature dealing with chronic illness; and 3) the literature dealing with adaptability to stress.

CHILDREN’S RESPONSES TO NEBULOUS THREATS

Most of the literature on children and stress (e.g., Eth & Pynoos, 1985) had concentrated on severe and direct stress. However, there are a few reported cases of children responding to indirect threats (e.g., Handford et al., 1986; Pynoos et al., 1987).

Handford et al. (1986) examined 35 children and their parents who lived in the vicinity of the Three Mile Island (TMI) nuclear plant. Although the accident at TMI was real and caused much anxiety in the surrounding community, the effects of the accident could not be immediately detected. There was a public alert in the area and nearly everyone knew of some potential danger, but threats of this kind are not understood very well by the public in general, much less school-aged children. Thirty-five children were selected at random from households in the surrounding

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30-mile radius from TMI. They were interviewed immediately after the accident and lV2 years after the accident. All 35 mothers agreed to par- ticipate in the study, and 32 fathers also participated. The authors found that all participants experienced much anxiety immediately after the ac- cident, but the parents’ anxiety all but subsided by the time follow-up data were collected. However, the children still experienced some resid- ual anxiety at the time of the follow-up. The parents of these children reported that they had not noticed any undue anxiety in their children. The authors speculated that one of three possible interpretations seemed appropriate: 1) parents may have underestimated or did not appreciate their children’s reactions; 2) the children may have exaggerated their feelings about the accident to the researchers; and 3) it may have been a combination of the above two possibilities. If we were to accept the possibility that there was at least some degree of parental insensitivity to their children’s reactions, part of the responsibility of mental health workers is to help parents understand the subtle types of effects such nebulous threats can have upon children.

Pynoos et al. (1987) examined 159 children attending an elementary school that experienced an attack by a sniper firing upon the school playground. One child and a passerby were killed, and 13 children were injured in the attack. Those children studied were divided into four groups: 1) those actually on the playground when the shooting occurred; 2) those at school but not on the playground; 3) those who had either gone home before the shooting or who were absent the day of the shoot- ing; and 4) those on a different academic track and on a vacation period. Although the results clearly indicate that the nearer in proximity to the shooting, the more likely a child was to experience PTSD symptoms, a number of students not at school still experienced mild-to-severe PTSD symptoms. For the two groups least proximal to the shooting, about 25% experienced mild PTSD symptoms, 15% experienced moderate symp- toms, and 5% experienced severe symptoms.

These studies are relevant to our discussion of nonwitnessed rape because they demonstrate that many children are quite aware of stressful situations affecting their lives. The Handford et al. (1986) study indicates that parents may not be aware of the reactions of their children to events that do not seem immediately salient. The Pynoos et al. (1987) study indicates that even minimal awareness of upsetting events can have a mild-to-profound effect upon children. Because of the social stigma of rape and the myth that it is a sexual act, most parents will likely exclude children from their conception of a support system for the mother and will not be aware that the children may be affected by the unobserved rape. We assert that such exclusion of children from therapy in the after- math of a rape is unwise.

Chronic Illness

Rolland (1987, 1988) has discussed the effects of chronic illness upon family functioning. If the rape of the mother in a family were to trigger

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Effects of Rape Upon Victims and Families 155

a PTSD reaction, Rolland’s work becomes particularly useful in under- standing the sequelae one might expect to see in the family.

Rolland divides chronic illnesses into acute-onset illnesses, such as heart attacks and injuries, and gradual-onset illnesses, such as arthritis and Parkinson’s disease. Since a rape incidence constitutes an acute sit- uation, we will concentrate on Rolland’s discussion of acute-onset ill- nesses. Acute-onset illnesses are more stressful than their gradual-onse t counterparts because the family must divide its energies between defen- sive reactions, such as protection against further deterioration, and pro- gressive reactions, such as maximizing mastery of the situation through family restructuring or problem solving. Such illnesses challenge the family’s structure, roles, problem solving, and affective coping mecha- nisms. Families that are successful a t dealing with these illnesses ”tolerate highly charged affective states, exchange clearly defined roles flexibly, solve problems efficiently, and use outside resources” (Rolland, 1988, p.

If children are excluded from the recovery process from rape, we feel they will experience the stress of changing boundaries within the family without being able to prepare psychologically for those changes. For example, suppose that the father of the family unwittingly withdraws his support from the mother because he feels she was at fault for the incident. The mother may then turn to her children for support. This process would be readily observable to the skilled family therapist, but if the children are not included as part of the therapeutic support system, the process might go undetected. As a result, the course of the recovery might actually worsen over time. However, if children were explicitly included in the recovery process, it might be completed more quickly.

435).

Adaptation to Stress

Two recent models of family interaction have integrated a wide range of family issues. Olson’s Circumplex Model (e.g., Olson, 1986; Olson et al., 1983) and Beavers’ Systems Model (e.g., Beavers & Voeller, 1983) have both emphasized the importance of family cohesion and adaptability in adjusting to external stressors. Both models characterize the difference between healthy and dysfunctional families in terms of adjustment to such stressors. As Olson et al. (1983) indicate, the models are essentially compatible with one another, with the major difference being in the way they characterize adaptability. Olson’s Circumplex Model sees adapta- bility in terms of system change, from morphogenesis to morphostasis. Dysfunctional families exhibit too much or too little change in response to stress, while healthy families exhibit a moderate degree of change. Beavers’ Systems Model sees adaptability in terms of competence. Dys- functional families are not competent in dealing with stress, while healthy families are quite competent. Thus, Olson’s model would require families to adapt to the rape of the mother in a flexible or structured manner (as opposed to the extremes of chaos and rigidity), while Beavers’ model

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156 The American Journal of Family Therapy, Vol. 19, No. 2, Summer 1991

7’ABI,E 1 Schematic Kepresentation of Boss and Gixxnl)ei-g’s ( 19x4) Modcl

I’h ysirally P1.eset11

Psychologically Low ISoundaIy High 13ouii(I; i i .y

A in bi gi I i I y

1’1 I y s i (.a I I \ A I )h(‘I I 1

Prescni i\i~il,iguii y

would require families to adapt to rape competently, with no upper bound on competence.

A major difficulty arises when the entire family is not involved in the healing process, as we have been discussing throughout this paper. How are children to respond in a flexible or structured manner if they are excluded from any knowledge that an adjustment in adaptability is re- quired? Because boundaries are changing around them without expla- nation, these children are placed in an ambiguous situation. Boss and Greenberg (1984) discuss how ambiguous boundaries can add more stress to a family than the precipitating stressor event. Table 1 represents their model schematically.

Boss and Greenberg state that sometimes certain illnesses can cause a physically present/psychologically absent situation. Increases in bound- ary ambiguity lead to increases in family stress, which in turn lead to increases in family dysfunction. Thus, in connecting rape with illness reaction, as we have done in the previous section, family dysfunction would be predicted by Boss and Greenberg’s model unless steps can be taken to render the mother psychologically present. This process, we contend, will be facilitated by the inclusion of children in family therapy. This will serve both to support the mother and to clarify boundaries for the children.

GUIDELINES FOR FAMILY THERAPISTS

Before formal guidelines are proposed, it must be emphasized that some form of intervention must be administered immediately after the incident. McCombie et al. (1976) have indicated that early intervention is essential for the prevention of later psychological and psychosomatic disturbances. The most logical location for this early intervention would be the hospital emergency room (Arabanel, 1976), where a comprehen- sive system of legal, medical, and psychological assistance could be b‘ w e n in one place.

Taking all of the above into consideration, the following guidelines for family therapists are proposed:

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Effects of Rape Upon Victims and Families 157

1) The most valuable service a family therapist can offer is to educate the victim and her family about the myths of rape. Rape is not a sexual act, but rather a life-threatening one.

2) Individual sessions should be scheduled so that all family members, especially the husband, can ventilate their feelings without fear of exposing the “dark side” of their character to the other family mem- bers until this becomes appropriate, if at all.

3) Children should understand that their mother was in a life-threat- ening situation and that the family will temporarily be in a confused state.

4) Family members (including extended family members and close friends who might be included in the support system) should be warned about the types of reactions the mother might be experienc- ing (such as the various symptoms of RTS). This will serve to prepare them for these reactions so they can respond not with bewilderment but with support.

5) Families should be made aware that they are most useful when help- ing the victim mobilize her own best coping strategies rather than sheltering her as a helpless child.

6) Emphasizing the strengths of the victim’s actions is necessary to help her reestablish control of her impulses and of her destiny.

7) The victim should learn that it is acceptable to be angry, for anger will serve to combat her feelings of immobilization.

8) Therapists should serve as models for empathy and display the ability to address a difficult issue with poise and without being overly di- rective.

9) Therapists should try to understand the family’s equilibrium before the rape and to determine if that state is conducive for an expedient recovery. If not, they should try to help the family establish a new balance. This new state should involve all family members, for the reliance upon only one member (or just a few members) serves to enmesh boundaries and establish unnecessarily rigid boundaries around the other family members.

10) Although the victim’s need for silence must be honored, the quicker the mobilization of feelings and restructuring of the family is done, the quicker will be the end of uncertainty and stress. A return to equilibrium will help relieve strains upon family resources. In this process, the victim should be mildly pressured into letting go of her silence.

We hope that these guidelines prove useful for therapists. We would like to reiterate the importance of including the children of rape victims in family therapy. It is doubtful that any therapist will not be exposed to a victim of rape in some manner, be it an actual client, the mother of a child being seen, or a close friend or relative of a client. Furthermore, we hope that therapists recognize the serious social problem rape has become and the psychological adjustments victims undergo. Finally, we

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158 The American Journal of Family Therapy, Vol. 19, No. 2, Summer 1991

hope that any myths the reader may have held about rape have been dispelled by the material presented here and that the reader will respond with empathy toward victims of rape and their families.

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