The ApostropheThat Annoying Little Mark of Punctuation That

Causes So Much Fuss and Makes People Want to Stop Writing and Jump Off a Ledge Because Nobody Knows How to Use it Correctly Even Though It Is as

Clear As Day.

What is it?The “flying comma” used in two important

grammatical structures

1) To show contractions2) To show possession (ownership) in nouns.

Why does it matter?Apostrophes provide clarification of both

contractions and possessive situations.

Without them, possessive situations can be exceptionally confusing to the reader.

How do I use it?Watch on…

1) To Make ContractionsDid not = didn’tCannot = can’tWould not = wouldn’tAm not = ain’t

While logical, this breaks the rules of Standard Formal English

Girl is = Girl’sThe girl’s (girl is) going to win that race.

2) To Make Nouns PossessiveSingular noun that own something

The boy’s hatOne boy owns a hat

The Tour de France’s winnerOne winner of the Tour de France

Singular PossessiveTake the singular noun and add an ‘s

Exception!!It’s vs its

If a singular item is an IT, to make it possessive, we write …..

Its

The rule seems to imply that you write IT’S (since ONE it owns something and it is singular)This is incorrect!

Possessive Plural Nouns Make the noun plural and then add one of two

constructions:

1) If the plural form ends in an s = add just the ‘a) Boys’ hatsb) Girls’ pants

2) If the plural does NOT end in an s = add the ‘sa) children’s booksb) women’s flowers

Time or QuantityWhile not truly “possessive,” it might help to

think about it in this manner:

1) Two weeks’ timeI will give you my project within two weeks’

time(As if the weeks own the time)

2) Give me four yards’ worth of fabric.The yards “own” the fabric.

Special CasesBrother-in-law owns a dog

Brother-in-law’s dog

MANY brothers-in-law have dogsBrothers-in-law’s dog

More Special CasesOne car owned by two people

Tom and Jean’s car

Two cars owned by two different peopleTom’s and Jean’s cars

Never…Never…Never…NEVER use the apostrophe to make a word

plural!!

That is the most incorrect usage of the apostrophe.

This error is the most glaring mistake a writer can make.

It shows a great immaturity by a writer.

What do these Structures Mean? 1) Giant Kid’s Playground2) Pant’s altered3) Next week: Nouns and Apostrophe’s

(BBC’s website advertising a grammar site for children!)

4) Pupil’s Entrance5) Adult Learner’s Week6) Bobs’ Motors

More!7) Mens Toilets8) Citizens Advice Bureau9) Cyclist’s Only

More Silliness..People knew they needed an apostrophe, but

didn’t know where!

1) Ladie’s hairdresser2) Mens coat’s3) Childrens’ education

(In a letter from the head of education at the National Union of Teachers)

4) Freds’ Restaurant

Plain Illiteracy…Hot Dogs: A Meal in Its’ SelfRecruitment at it’s best….to welcome you to the British Library, it’s

services and catalogsYour 21 today! (On a birthday card)

A Note from Our Sponsor“It would be nice if one day the number of

apostrophes properly placed in it’s equaled exactly the number of apostrophes properly omitted from its, instead of the other way around. In the meantime, what can be done by those of us sickened by the state of apostrophe abuse? First, we must refute the label “dinosaurs” (I really hate that). And second, we must take up arms. Here are the weapons required in the apostrophe wars (stop when you feel uncomfortable):

Correction fluidBig pensStickers cut in a variety of sizes (for sticking

over unwanted apostrophes)Pail of paint with big brushGuerilla-style clothingStrong medication for personality disorderBullhornGun” -Lynn Truss, Eats, Shoots and

Leaves