Sterling Cub Reporter: April 2015

www.sterlingcubreporter.com April 2015 • Sterling Cub Reporter • 1

Class helps area businesses

Pg. 4

Running on inspiration

Pg. 6

Looking for @SHSWeg

Pg. 14

APRIL 2015

Volume 1 • Issue 7 www.sterlingcubreporter.com

2 • Sterling Cub Reporter • April 2015 www.sterlingcubreporter.com

The Sterling High School Cub Reporter and all subsidiary publications are designated forums of free speech. The print edition is published October through May of each school year by the journalism class at Sterling High School. It is dis-tributed for no charge throughout Unified School District 376 buildings and the Sterling community. The first copy is free. Subsequent copies will cost $1 per copy. For infor-mation about being added to the subscription list, contact Todd Vogts at 620-278-2171. Letters to the editor are wel-come. Email them to [email protected]. All letters must be signed. Anonymous letters will not be printed. All letters subject to editing for legal, grammati-cal and factual reasons.

ADVISERTodd Vogts

STAFFAlex Veliz

Caleb HendricksDallas LackeyKasady Smith

Kylah ComleyLindsay GilmoreTaryn Gillespie

Sterling HigH ScHoolCUB REPORTER& www.sterlingstudentpublications.com

308 E. Washington, Sterling, KS 67579Phone: 620-278-2171 • Fax: 620-278-3237

OPINION

ADVERTISING SALESTodd Vogts’ Marketing Class

About the Cover Photo: The student section dressed in their “Royalty” clothes to cheer on the boys in the first round of sub-state. “It’s nice when the boys dressed up in togas to support us, so we wanted to do something to show our support for them,” junior Kylah Comley said. (Photo by Taryn Gillespie)

Take advantage of opportunities givenHave you ever been asked to do some-

thing you didn’t think you would like? Was it your only choice so you went ahead and did it?

That’s what environmental science was for me. I took biology freshman year and didn’t like it at all. I really didn’t want to take anatomy and physiology or chemistry yet, so that left me with one choice, envi-ronmental science.

I went into this class knowing I wouldn’t like it... Why would I? I didn’t like any other science classes. But this one was different. This class was a hands on class that would make it different from any other class I had ever taken before.

I remember starting out. We had a few different projects, including working with the Volt data as well as working with KidWind.

These kind of assignments gave me more of a real-world experience and skills I could use later in life. Through this class, I now have had many opportunities I never thought were possible.

After this first year of class came to an end, I started to think about what science class I would take the next year, and then one day Mr. Whisler ask me to be in his advanced environmental science class the next year. I thought about this quite a bit. I really had liked this class, but did I really want to take it again? I took the opportunity that was of-fered to me, and I will never regret that decision.

Through this class, I got to experience flying for the first time, seeing sites I never imagined I would get to see, meet-ing many new people and creating connections through those people that will benefit me in the future.

I have learned not only the importance of using renewable energy and how we need to work as a population to reduce the carbon footprint each and every one of us are making, but also how to use many computer programs, how to analyze data, how wind turbines work and the parts in them. Most importantly, I’ve learned how to communicate and get your point across to many people. This skill will help me throughout my entire life. Communica-tion is something we all need, and I feel as though I excel at it because of his class.

Giving presentations to many groups including the Kansas Corporation Com-mission and being able to answer any of the questions they may have about our projects has helped stretch me and helped

grow my skills.This skill of communication will help me excel at job

interviews and college presentations, even presentations I may have to give in the future for my career.

What I am getting out of this class will, in the long run, help me excel in my life.

If I wouldn’t have taken that opportunity to continue in this class, I would not be where I am today. This class has also inspired me to continue to work with the environmen-tal aspects, and I am considering minoring in it in college.

This opportunity that was given to me didn’t always seem the most clear and obvious choice. It wasn’t always fun and games, but this opportunity is pushing me to try new things and learn new skills. I challenge you to take those opportuni-ties you are offered, even if they don’t seem obvious or fun. It could turn out to be a lifelong love of yours, or even a career.

TARYN GILLESPIE


NEWS

With March Madness now in full swing, students throughout the school have watched as their brackets have been ruined by upsets and Cinderella teams. More than a million people participate in the tradition of filling out brackets. Sterling High School has been no different.

“I always love filling out brackets for March Madness,” freshman Zach Schissler said. “Even though I’m not a huge college basketball fan, the bracket makes each game more exciting because you’re routing for the teams that you picked to win. There are teams that I had never even heard of that I was routing for just because I picked them in my bracket.”

Although most students don’t really care, there are those who take the bracket challenge very seriously.

“I think the best part about it is competing against friends,” freshman Lucas Weigel said. “It’s always fun to see who can get the most picks right, and who can guess the

upsets.”Some students find it difficult to pick based on who they

think will and who they want to win.“You have to decide before you make your picks whether

you actually want to win or not,” freshman Rhett Bagby said. “If you want to win, you can’t just pick the team you like. I think a lot of KU fans have that problem.”

Some students even admit to stressing over their selec-tions.

“The game that I stressed the most about was the UNC-Harvard matchup,” senior Cameron Fair said. “I wanted to pick the upset, but I just couldn’t do it in my heart.”

This year, the Kentucky Wildcats are the favorites to win the big dance after a perfect regular season, and despite the numerous University of Kansas and Wichita State Univer-sity fans, most students have Kentucky winning it all.

“Being from Kansas, I think we all would like to see a Kansas team win,” sophomore Kaleab Wilson said. “Hon-estly, though, I don’t think anyone will beat Kentucky. They are just too good.”

The student body was also divided after the #7 seeded Shockers faced off against the #2 seeded Jayhawks, in a highly anticipated matchup that fans had been waiting on for years.

“I was just excited that we got to play them because as one of the the two top teams in the state, why shouldn’t we be able to play each other?” teacher Todd Vogts said. “The win for WSU shows that this isn’t just a flash in the pan situ-ation or a fluke. It shows that we have built up a program, and we are a team that can compete at the highest level.”

When it is all said and done and the brackets are de-stroyed, the students are all eager for next year.

“After Iowa State choked in the first round, my bracket was totally ruined,” junior Nick Schissler said. “So after that, you just watch the games and enjoy the rest of the tournament. All you can do is hope for a better bracket next season.”

SHS senior Cameron Fair works on his NCAA March Madness bracket. (Photo by Caleb Hendricks)

SHS students reflect on March Madness CALEB HENDRICKS

Cub Reporter


NEWS

244 South BroadwaySterling, KS 67579Ph: 620-278-2102

Eric Wenzel’s Web Page Design class has worked on many website building techniques so far this year, and recently they got the opportu-nity to put what they’ve learned into practice.

Five students contacted some local business to see if they could either cre-ate or update their websites.

“I was thinking through what would be a practical way for them to start applying what we’ve walked through,” Wenzel said. “After looking through some of the local websites, I thought some of them could use some help.”

Although Wenzel sparked the idea, he is letting his students do all the work on their own.

“I came up with a list first of some people they could call, and then I let them do the whole thing themselves,” Wenzel said. “From calling to setting it up, to what content they needed — stuff like that. I wanted them to kind of experience what it would be like if they were a website designer.”

The students are using a online website creator called Weebly, and it allows the students to create the web-sites for free.

“The students get no financial benefits. It’s one of the perks that we wanted to offer — a free website that eventually they would hand over to the business, and then they can use it and update it,” Wenzel said.

Most of the work has been done during class, except for face-to-face meetings with the business owners to see what they wanted on their web-sites.

“As a class, we all came up with a se-ries of questions that might be good to ask, like what type of website, design, pictures, colors and, depending on the business, some were more open to just saying, ‘you’re free to make it how ever you want,’ and others were more specific,” Wenzel said. “All but one

student was able to get a face-to-face interaction.”

The websites they are updating are for the Abbyville Rodeo and The Ster-ling Wellness Center. They are creating websites from scratch for Shine — a Unique Salon, Donna Foster who sells antiques and Patricia Dellinger who sells Blanquilts, which is a combina-tion of blankets and quilts.

“It is a bit hard doing Abbyville Rodeo’s website just because no matter how much planning you do, something is going to change,” junior Alex Veliz said. “The people from Abbyville have their own suggestions and might not like what I’ve done.”

Updating local websites not only help the students learn, but the process also provides benefits for the businesses.

“I’m excited because its one step closer to getting media out there to get more people to

come in, who may not know about our salon,” Shine owner Jenny Zeller said. “When they Google salons in the area, ours will now pop up, and that’s huge for us. Being new, that’s a big help.”

Although the process is slow, the experience the web design students are gaining is paying off.

“The class is all about web design, so it’s actually putting us out there and making us experience things as they come,” senior Kasady Smith said. “It’s helping me for my future in graphic design because it’s giving me one more piece of media that I can use in the future.”

Class assists local businesses KYLAH COMLEY

Cub Reporter

Junior Alex Veliz updates the Abbyville Rodeo website.(Photo by Kylah Comley)


Proudly supporting Sterling High School!

Season ends with improvementKASADY SMITH

Cub Reporter

Despite the end of a season and a cooperative agreement with a neigh-boring school, many wrestlers found that they ended their first and last season with improvements.

One wrestler felt he still improved even though his season didn’t reflect a winning record.

“In the season itself, I didn’t do too well. I learned a lot and I got a lot better, but my record didn’t show it or anything,” junior Zane Nichols said. “I was three points away from state, and this is like my worst year of wrestling so far. This is the closest I’ve been to state, so it feels good and bad.”

Some wrestlers reached goals that they had previously set for themselves.

“It made me a lot better athlete, and that’s really the only reason I went out for wrestling is to become a better athlete,” sophomore Brandon Frederick said. “I got a lot better. You could just tell. I competed a lot longer in all of my matches. My first tournament of the year I went out and got pinned in like, two seconds, and at the end of the year, I was making it to the ends of all the periods in all the matches.”

First-year wrestlers learned more about the sport and how to compete.

“At the beginning, I was really con-fused about everything, and now I’m just good enough,” sophomore Ethan Proffitt said.

Even seasoned wrestlers still learned about the sport and about themselves.

“It has definitely taught me to keep going because if I would have given up on myself half-way through the season when I was like 4-12 or something, I wouldn’t have even had a chance to try and make it to state, but I just kept wrestling and kept my mind in it. I got pretty close,” Nichols said.

Despite ending his final season with a third place, senior Cody Salazar still feels he improved and looks forward to his college wrestling season.

“I really wanted a state title, but both years I really competed in state,” Salazar said. “If I was wrestling like I did on Saturday, I would have beat that kid. Now I just have to focus on things getting me to college and focus on get-ting a national championship there. All in all, it was a good season.”

Nichols believes that wrestling is more of a mental sport compared to any other sport.

“Wrestling is definitely a big mental game, like most sports are, but wres-tling definitely is,” he said. “If you get down as soon as you get taken down or if you just get down on yourself early in the match, it’s already over. You don’t have a chance of winning, but if you get taken down and you just keep wrestling, you have a chance of beat-ing that kid, even if you have no right beating him.”

Some first-year wrestlers found that wrestling is just as much a physical

sport as it is a mental one.“It’s the hardest sport I’ve ever

done before. It just works about every muscle in your body,” Proffitt said.

Aside from being difficult all-around, there are some athletes who see wrestling as both an individual and team sport.

“It’s an individual sport when you’re competing, but everything in practice is team related. You always do team events, and you always feel like you’re part of the team because your team-mates are always on the side of the mat cheering you on,” Frederick said. “You’re by yourself when you’re com-peting, but it just still feels like a team sport because of the way we’re always together. Wrestling is a lot more gruel-ing and makes you want to cry more, so when you do that with 10 other guys, it really makes you a lot closer.”

Others see it as a more individual-ized sport.

“It’s completely different because in football you can kind of rely or blame somebody for a mistake you might have made, but in wrestling, if you lose, it’s all on you. If you win, it’s all your hard work that you put in. Wrestling is just like a totally different mindset. You have to take your own re-sponsibility. You can’t blame anybody else, and you can’t take anybody else’s credit,” Nichols said.

Overall, athletes enjoyed either their first or last wrestling season.

“It was awesome,” sophomore Derek Boeken said.


FEATURE

One minute you aren’t feeling well and chalking it up to being pregnant. Then you wake up in

a hospital. You’re no longer pregnant, and you look down to find your leg is gone. For Liz Willis, this nightmare came true.

“I was extremely grateful to learn that I was alive after having a 1 percent chance of survival,” she said. “I didn’t know I had delivered my baby or had

my leg amputated for 10 days. Up until that point, I was given medica-tion to forget what was happening. My husband told me that our son was born and in the NCIU and that my leg had been amputated. That is when I looked down and realized what had happened.”

Willis, who grew up in Sterling, is now working as a paraprofessional at Augusta Middle School where she also lives. As a mother, wife and an active runner, she goes to the gym for two to three hours per day, six days per week.

Despite her missing limb, she is

training to run in the 2016 Paralym-pics in Rio De Janeiro.

Her love for running started at an early age.

“I started running at the age of 10 or 11. I was competing at the Sterling Grade School track meet in 5th grade, and I ran the 400 meter in 63 seconds and was quite faster than the others my age. After the meet, some coaches, as well as my parents, told me they felt I should pursue running,” she said. “I continued to run through junior high and high school, and I ran the 400 and 800 for Dan Whisler. Running in high

school was a lot of fun, and I always managed to get into some trouble.”

Willis enjoyed running and had success while in high school.

“Liz was a cross country runner, and I worked with her all four years in both cross county and track. She is a very competitive runner. She is Sterling High School’s record holder for the 800 meter, and she went to state two times in high school as an individ-ual runner,” Sterling High School cross country and track coach Dan Whisler said. “She’s a remarkable young lady.”

Willis stopped running competi-

tively after her first year of college, but her love for it continued as she started a family of her own. However, difficul-ties during pregnancy caused the her life as a runner to be altered.

“I had sickness throughout my whole pregnancy, and one day I was not feeling good at all. I gave it a cou-ple days,” she said. “When it continued I went to the doctor, and they told me it was just my pregnancy making me sick.”

Then the illness took a turn for the worse.

“A few hours after my legs started burning uncontrollably, and I called my OB/GYN. She told me I needed to go to the hospital right away,” Willis said. “When I got there, they told me they had to do an emergency caesar-ean section. After the baby was born, I was still having complications. They noticed I was bleeding internally, and they had to amputate my leg to buy some time to figure out what was wrong. Essentially, they found out I had Crohn’s disease.”

Losing a leg caused many obstacles in Willis’ life, including caring for a baby.

“Coming home from the hospital was a challenge because I went for six months with no leg. The first six months was spent going around my house with one leg and using a walker. A challenge was trying to be a new mom to my baby while I was still re-covering myself,” she said. “After those six months, I was able to get a walking leg, and I really learned to walk pretty quickly because I had motivation — I wanted to be able to be mobile and be there to help my son.”

Willis had to walk before she could run.

Running On inspiRatiOn

TARYN GILLESPIECub Reporter

Local woman overcomes obstacles to participate in the 2016 Paralympics

“I was extremely grateful to learn that I was alive after having a 1 percent chance of survival.”

— Liz Willis


Willis runs in practice. Willis is training to compete in the 2016 Paralympics. (Photo Courtesy of Liz Willis)


“I walked for a year and got a run-ning leg a year after,” she said. “You don’t just put on the leg and are able to run. I had a lot of muscle atrophy that I had to overcome. I started out running one minute, and everyday I increased how much I was running until about a month later I was running a 5K.”

Even with her progress, Willis wasn’t considering running competi-tively at first. Eventually, though, her improvements caused her to look at running as more than just a hobby.

“I was invited to a running com-petition by my prosthetic company, Scott Sabolich. I competed at the UCO Endeavor Games in Edmond, Okla-homa,” Willis said. “I ran the 800 and the 5K because those were my stron-gest events. There were recruiters from the Paralympics there, but I didn’t even know they were there. I was just having fun and running with different amputees.”

Her performance caught the eye of those recruiters.

“After the meet, the recruiter called me up and asked me if I was interested in running in the Paralympics. I said yes. He came to Wichita to watch me run,” Willis said. “While he was watch-ing, he asked if I had ever thought about running the 100 or 200 meter. I told him, ‘No, I don’t sprint, and I’m short. I just don’t have the correct build for a sprinter.’ He agreed and let me continue my drills. A little while later he asked me what I was wanting to run in the Paralympics, and I said the 5K. He asked if I knew that the 5K was not an event in the Paralympics.”

Upon learning this, Willis reached out to a former running mentor.

“I went and met up with Dan Whisler and talked to him about the situation, and he had me sit down and write down my goals,” she said. “They were little things — like learn to ride a bike, swim, find a coach — and way down at the bottom there was go to the Paralympics.”

With Whisler’s connections in the running world thanks to his career as a coach, Willis started to see everything lining up.

“Dan put me in contact with Jim Helmer, the cross country coach at

Southwestern College, and I went and ran for him,” she said. “It wasn’t three days in and he told me I should really be running the 100 and 200. I agreed but was still kind of adamant about sprinting not being right for me. I met with the sprinting coach, T.J. Harris, and started training for the 100 and 200 meter about a year ago.”

For Willis, training quickly turned into competing.

“I had a decent season,” she said. “I competed in Arizona, Oklahoma, Virginia and here in Kansas. I ended up placing fourth in the United States for the leg amputees in the women’s category for the 100 meter dash.”

Willis cares about others and makes it a priority to pick people up when they are down, and, without realizing it, she is inspiring those around her.

“Liz has been dealt a set of cards many others have not had to deal with. She doesn’t complain or feel bad for herself. She works for what she wants and inspires others to want to have the determination that she has. The fact that she is so goal-oriented and willing to do whatever is necessary to get what she wants makes her a special person,” Harris, her sprinting coach, said. “She continues to show up everyday, and she works extremely hard to make her goals possible with a smile on her face.”

Harris isn’t the only person to see the effect Willis has on others.

“Liz is a great example of the quote I often use saying, ‘Life is 10 percent what happens to us and 90 percent how we respond to it’. She has made remarkable progress and bounced back so quickly. She is an inspiration,” Whisler said.

Willis said she feels blessed by those who have supported her and continue to support her.

You too can support her as well by helping her get a new prosthesis made for sprinting. Visit www.gofundme.com/lizwillis to donate to her fund, as well as read updates as she gets closer to competing for the 2016 Paralympics.

“I thank God every single day of my life,” Willis said. “I look at my life and I know how close I was to not getting to experience life essentially. Everyday is a blessing. I have gained happiness in my life through motivating and inspiring others. I saw how communi-ties like Sterling came together to raise money on my behalf. Seeing commu-nities gather together to help in a time of need just breaks you, and it humbles you to know how good our society really is. Having experienced this my-self, it brings me joy to inspire others through my running. Showing people that they are worth something and they can accomplish their dreams and aspiration just like I did is my motiva-tion to continue.”

Willis runs the 5k at the endeavor games at Univer-sity of Central Oklahoma. (Photo Courtesy of Liz Willis)


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After having a leg amputated during a complication with her pregnancy, Willis has learned to run again with the help of a prothesis. (Photo Courtesy of Liz Willis)


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SPORTS

“We had a great season.”— Jill Rowland, girls head coach

ALEX VELIZCub Reporter

Despite defeats in sub-state for both the Sterling High School varsity boys and girls basketball teams, they both ended with winning seasons. The boys ending with a record of 13-8, and the girls ended with a 17-5 record.

“We had a great season. There were some disappointing aspects, but we had a good season. We never lost to a team who wasn’t ranked,” Girls Head Coach Jill Rowland said. “We had some growth that needed to occur, and I feel that it did. We got second at league, which is the highest that we have gotten since I have been here.”

Rowland felt with the loss of a

few key players on the defensive end, change needed to happen.

“We started the season without Chelsey, and with the loss of her and a graduated senior Aubree Nuest, we lost a total of 20 points defensively. So we had to make adjustments,” Rowland said.“We just had to redefine ourselves, and we talked about a lot of things like toughness and teamwork along with sacrificing individual interest for the betterment on the team.”

Senior Andrew McPherson looks back at his previous three seasons and compares them to his senior year.

“This basketball season was so much better than previous years just because it was so much fun,” McPher-son said. “I love basketball to begin with, but the past two years I kind of

dreaded going to practice. This year basketball practice was the highlight of my day.”

McPherson also thought his per-sonal goal was to help the under class-men succeed in the future.

“I didn’t really have any physical goals, but I did want to set the tone vocally, like me and Jordan got to-gether and talked about setting up the underclassmen for success later in high school and make the experience more fun,” McPherson said.

The other senior on the boys bas-ketball team is Jordan Proffitt, and he too had goals similar to McPherson’s.

“I feel that the chemistry between everyone was clicking and working well,” Proffitt said. “I wanted to be a

good leader for the younger guys.” For sophomore Kyler Comley, he

thinks this year’s season was better in comparison to last year.

“It was a lot of fun. Not necessar-ily since we won a lot of games, but just because of the team unity and the amount of fun we had with each other,” he said.

Comley said he believed the team has developed since the beginning of the season.

“I say we got a lot better at our skills, and we have more experience under our belt. We will have a better understanding on what is going on next year,” Comley said.

Freshman Taya Wilson believed working with the varsity team has

helped her improve in basketball. “I think I got a lot better on the de-

fensive end and getting to the basket,” Wilson said. “I think we were strong all the way through, and we just got better on the boards and getting shots.”

For freshman Kenan Comley, his first year on the high school basketball squad has been good.

“I thought the season was success-ful. Playing with the right teammates was a lot of fun, and just being a player on the team was fun,” he said.

Besides the skills that have been developed on the court, Comley feels the relationships that have been estab-lished from the beginning of the year have also been built upon.

“The team grew a lot closer together through season, and we just created bonds and relationships that we want to keep for the rest of our lives, like with the seniors we are losing,” he said.

Senior Chelsey Riffel has conflicting feeling about this season.

“This season was one of the worst records, not saying it was bad because it was pretty good,” Riffel. “Overall, I felt content with this season, even though I only played a quarter of it, but I felt this season was successful even if we didn’t make it to state. The success was in our team.”

All the records aside, Riffel thought there was improvement within the team as the season progressed.

“We had a lot of people who im-proved, both guards and posts. Every-one overall improved, and we got really close. We got better defensively,” Riffel said. “It really helped that everyone was supportive in the team.”

Junior Sydney Wilson believed considering all the obstacles the team faced, they had a successful season.

“We have a really tough league, and so having beat Lyons and just keeping up with Hesston, it makes it a success-ful year, considering we didn’t have our

Black Bears look back on their varsity season


five for half of the season and pulling together as a team and playing with-out one of our seniors,” Wilson said.

Junior Kylah Comley felt more confident toward the end of the year than at the beginning of the year.

“Mentally I have gotten better as a leader. Being a point guard, everyone looks to you to see what is going on,” Comley said. “Skill-wise, my shot has gotten better, and, just at the begin-ning, my confidence was down. I didn’t want to take as many shots, and now I am willing to take certain shots and step-up for the team.”

Senior Andi Dowell thinks this season has been more memorable

than the past three seasons she has played.

“This stands out just because of the fact that I am senior, and it means a bit more than the others. Since it is my last season, it is just more special,” she said. “When I look back, I feel I took basketball for granted, so this season has taught not to take any-thing for granted, like you’re health or the position.”

Sophomore Lindsay Gilmore felt that the team ended strongly.

“Although a lot of people think they didn’t do as well as last year, we had a lot of people step-up for the team,” she said.

McPherson feels this season has been a base to help the underclass-men succeed in future years.

“We definitely set the foundation for the next couple of years, and our teams will do really well and win a state title these next two years,” McPherson said.

Boys Head Coach Derek Schnei-der thinks this season was mainly a way to integrate all of the players on the team.

“We had good energy and team building,” he said. “Our skills also improved, and we had some of the younger guys acclimated into the program.”

Freshman Kenan Comley shoots a free throw, during the first round

of sub-state against Halstead. (Photo by: Taryn Gillespie)


INFOGRAPHIC

THE

SWEG

FILE

@SHSweg is a Twitter account that first came on the scene in may of 2014 and soon grabbed the attention of almost all the SHS student body. Rumors flew all around regard-ing the identity of the new account that had been praising the students and teachers here at Sterling High School. Almost a year has passed and there is still no proof regarding the identity of “SHS Sweg.” Some suspects have been ruled out, while others have just now been brought into conversation.

Suspects

Will Dutton“I think it is Will because

he’s always been real about everything but never rude,” senior Jessy Marceline said.

Steven Hinshaw“Steven gets really hyped up about the littliest things, just

like SHSweg,” junior Ben Millhouse said.

The Fat Pack AKA

Cole Slupski and Scott Dillenger

"It could be the fat pack because they are the joksters in the school and they would do that for

people to enjoy," sophomore Brady Ochs said.

Max Fulbright“I think it’s Max because

he’s up to date with almost everything,” sophomore

Sierra Emery said.

Brian Richter“I think it’s Mr.Richter be-cause he can relate to us all

well even thouhg he is older,” senior Jacob Haberman said.

BY: DALLAS LACKEY AND LINDSAY GILMORE


PRIME SUSPECT

SuspectsEvidence

Name: Brayden Joseph HosmanGrade: JuniorHair color: BrownEye color: BlueBirthday: Feb. 25, 1998Aliases: BHos, @SHSwegActivities: StuCo, Golf, DFYIT, NHS

FACT: @SHSWEG ADMITTED TO BEING A MALEFACT: BRAYDEN HOSMAN IS IN FACT, A MALE

FACT: @SHSWEG ADMITTED TO PLAYING A SPORTFACT: HOSMAN IS IN HIS THIRD YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL GOLFFACT: @SHSWEG POSTED A BABY PICTURE OF JUNIOR HOLLY DAVIS AT A CONTEST. THIS INDICATES THAT SHS SWEG IS CLOSE TO DAVIS

FACT: HOLLY DAVIS IS VERY CLOSE TO HOSMAN

“BRAYDEN AND I HAVE BEEN BFFS SINCE I CAN REMEMBER. SERIOUSLY LOVE THE KID SO MUCH,” DAVIS SAID.

DISCLAIMER: WITHOUT A FULL CONFESSION STERLING STUDENT PUBLICATIONS IS UNABLE TO PROVE NOR DENY THE IDENTITY OF “@SHSweg”. IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION REGARDING THE IDENTITY OF “@SHSweg” PLEASE CONTACT STERLING STUDENT PUBLICATIONS.


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“I don’t want to go. Do I have too?”“Yes, it’s family bonding time,” said my mother.“You should. I do. Your father does. Your brother does.”“No I don’t.”“Blake, I am trying to get a point across to your sister.”“Plus, who wants to sit in a car for a hour and go to a show

that is not even going to last an hour?”“Good question. Get into the car, and let’s find out.” By the time this argument over, she had won and was holding

the car door open for me. I gave in. She is just too good. The car drive was not very fun. Blake is in the part of his life

when he complains about everything.“I don’t know why you are dragging me to some comedy show

that most likely is not going to be funny.”“Just give it a chance.” By the way, my name is Rachel. I am a stubborn 16 year old

who doesn’t agree with anything. Personally, I don’t think that is true. It’s just what I have heard. When we got there, there was al-ready a huge line. By the time we got to the front, the ticket people were telling us it was sold out.

“Oops. At least we tried. Let’s go.”“Just a minute.” My dad said as he grabbed my shirt and pulled

me back. “Not so fast. Is there anything we can do?”“I am afraid not sir . . . hold up,” said the ticket man. Another

fellow ticket person was whispering something in the other ticket persons ear. “We have the front seats, but it will cost extra.”

“I say no,” I said and walked away.“I say yes, and please excuse my daughter.” When we walked into the arena, it was huge. It took us a while

to get down to the front. When we found our seats, the show began.

“Hello, everyone. Who is ready for some comedy?” The crowd went wild. “This one happened about a week ago. I had some allergic reaction going on, and my face was breaking out in a bad rash. My mom was freaking out and wanting to take me to the ER and my dad was like, ‘Now let’s not make any rash decisions,’ and we high-fived and my mom yelled at us.”

I really didn’t think it was that funny, so I drifted off to sleep. I woke up startled. My mother had been clapping and she had hit me.

“So sorry, dear,” was all she had said. Then she went back to watching the show. Since I was obviously awake now, I had to watch the show now.

“Jim Carrey isn’t even funny,” I tried to tell my mother.

She didn’t hear me.“One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in Tiny

Town woke up early to go to their local church. Before the service starts, the towns people sit in their pews and talk about their lives and families. Suddenly, at the altar, Satan appears. Everyone starts screaming and running to the exit, trampling over anyone to get out. Soon everyone was evacuated except for one guy, who was just sitting calmly in his pew. This confuses Satan a bit.”

This is very boring. I want to go home.“Satan walks up to the man. ‘Don’t you know who I am?’ And

the man says, ‘Yep, sure do.’ ‘Then aren’t you scared of me?’ ‘Nope. Sure ain’t?’ ‘Well, why not?’ ‘Well, I have been married to your sister for 25 years now.’”

I don’t know why, but that got the crowd.Jim said it was the last joke of the night. Finally. “My son came up to me the other day to ask me a question.

He asked, ‘How were people born?’ and I said that Adam and Eve made babies. Then my son ran to his mother and asked her the same question. And she told him, ‘Well, we were monkeys the we evolved to become what we are now.’ My son then ran up to me said said, ‘YOU LIED!’ and I said, ‘No, your mom was talking about her side of the family.”’ Everyone clapped. “Good night!”

“Can we go now?”“Once it is cleared,” said mom. When it was clear, we were able to finally get our car out. On

the way home, my dad was trying to be funny.“What is Forest Gump’s password?”“I don’t know.”“One Forest One.”“Hahahahah,” I said. My dad was still trying to be funny when we got home. Even

after we told him a million times that clearly he wasn’t funny, he wouldn’t listen. He would just keep going. But at least he was enjoying himself.

Speaking for all kids, we weren’t. It was late, so I gave my parents hugs goodnight and went to bed with stupid little jokes floating around in my head.

Bonding TimeBY FAITH WINTERS

Documents

Sterling Cub Reporter: April 2015