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MUSIC • SPORTS • LIFE
Citation preview
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �
� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �
Editor’s Letter . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.006 The Skinnie / Hearsay . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.008Accoutrements . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.014Destination . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.016Action Sports Roundup . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.029
For The Record . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.036Under The Radar . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.038Flicks / Keepin It Reel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.040Video . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.042Audio / Locals Only . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.044
Video Games / Bits and Bytes . . . . . . . . p.046Skinnie Scene . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.057Happy Endings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . p.072
EVERY ISSUE
p.010 RETURn OF A HOLLywOOD LEGEnD Ian Shepp Is Restoring The Historic Key Club
p.012 IF mEn ARE DOGS, wHAT ARE wOmEn? why Aren’t These Famous women Just As Bad?
p.016 GET yOUR BOARDInG PASS Saint Tropez Is The Destination Of Absolute Luxury
p.020 mORE THAn GOD GIVEn Ryan Sheckler Is Talented, But Don’t Knock The Hustle
p.024 x GAmES 16 PREVIEw 5 interviews, 5 Personalities, One Goal
p.030 wHAT’S THE DRESS CODE? Chromeo Is Opting For Business Casual
p.034 SOLO mISSIOn Bloc Party’s Kele Okereke Goes His Own way
p.036 BRIT POP ExPLOSIOn Dan Black Is Lighting Up Dance Floors
p.049 TRIPLE THREAT Taryn manning Can Do It All
p.052 DOn’T CHAnGE THAT STATIOn KROQ’s Stryker Gives you Reason not To.
FEATURES]___________________________
CONTENTS| jUlY 2010
p.049 p.05� p.0�4
p.0�0
4 • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 5
JUly2010JISSUE#10210184 Sixth St. Suite A
Rancho Cucamonga, Ca. 91730Ph. 909-476-0270 Fax 909-476-5931
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PUBLISHERSChief exeCutive OffiCer Jimmy Clinton
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EDITORIALeditOr-in-Chief Ramon Gonzales
COntributing Writers Jasen T. Davis, Alex mendoza, Eric Bonholtzer, Lexi Amparan, Katie Evans, Kristie Bertucci, Patrick Douglas, Lacy
Ottenson, Elysia mcmahan, melissa Fouler
For editorial submissions, email [email protected]
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ART & DESIGNArt direCtOr Robb Sackett
COntributing stAff Erik Faiivae, natalie Salim
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PHOTOGRAPHYCOntributing PhOtOgrAPhers Alan Rivera, Sean myers, Joanna miriam,
Dave Gatson, Karen Curley, Harmony Gerber, Edison Graff, Timothy Sheppard, Erik Faiivae, mark Sacro, michael Vincent,
Christian Sosa, Jeff Farsai
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SALES & MARkETINGsAles/MArketing direCtOr Jason Zahler
Advertising Liza Dalida, Ta’ mara Aarin, TJ Avila, Aaron AmayaAndy Alexander, Leigh Ann St. Cyr, Julius Lopez, Antoinette Belton
For all sales inquiries email [email protected]
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ADMINISTRATIvEPrOMOtiOn direCtOr Aaron Amaya
WebMAster House Of DesignsOnline editOr Amara Omeregie
COntributing stAff Lesley marin, Adrian Aranda, Angela JugonRaquel Lopez, Cynthia De Los Santos, maritza GuerreroRyan mercer, Alshan Barnett, Janessa Gray, Elliott Bruce
Katie Evans, Fiorella Bergandi, Elyse morton, Antoinette Belton, and Ryan mercer
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FASHIONfAshiOn direCtOr michelle ngo
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SUBSCRIBERS If the post office alerts us that your magazine is
undeliverable, we have no further obligation unless we receive a corrected address within two years.
LEGAL DISCLAIMERThe content in this magazine is for entertainment and intended for mature audiences only. Advertisers are responsible for their ads placed in the magazine. Skinnie magazine is not responsible for any actions taken by their readers. we may occasionally use images placed in public domain. Sometimes, it is not possible to identify and/or contact the copyright holder, if you claim ownership of something we’ve published, we will gladly make a proper acknowledgement. Skinnie magazine does not share opinions and/ or views stated by the writers and or photographers. Some of the content published may be of a mature nature; we do not, in any way, condone underage drinking or any other illegal activity. All submissions become property of Skinnie magazine, be it text, photos, art, etc.
Skinnie Entertainment MagazineAll Rights Reserved. 2010
Cover Photo by: Jeff Farsai
Right off of Pico Blvd in the middle of West L.A.
there is a small bungalow styled diner called The
Apple Pan. I met Stryker there at his recommendation
to snap some photos and maybe have a little lunch.
Surrounded by a huge mall, bank buildings, and retail
chains, this tiny, counter-only diner has endured since
just after WW II. As we pulled up a seat Stryker says, “I
have been coming here since I was a kid. I have never
known anyone different to work here. It has always
been the same people for years.” A tuna salad sandwich,
some fries, and some conversation later, Stryker and
I do an awkward West LA meets North Long Beach
hood handshake and part ways. As I drive away I think
a couple of things –“That sandwich was fucking great.”
And two, “that little diner has been there unchanged
63 years!”
Everything around that tiny diner had been modernized.
Construction, development, but The Apple Pan was
untouched. When you do something right, it never goes
out of style. And the fact remains, you can’t do it right,
for that long, if it isn’t something you sincerely love.
This July issue we managed to find people and stories
that highlight just that – getting it right, because they
well…get it.
Funny how all that came from a tuna sandwich on
wheat on a paper plate.
Keep it Hood,
Ramon Gonzales
ACCOMPLICES & ALIbISJanessa Gray intern________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________Too blessed to be stressed, Janessa Gray has been attending shows for the past
10 years at many of Orange County and Los Angeles venues. Having a passion for
tasting many of the delicious concoctions around the bars of Orange County, Gray
never misses an opportunity to party. Aspiring to be the Queen of PR, Gray always
finds time to shoot the shit with her bestie and grub on bomb carnitas tortas.
LesLey Marin intern ________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________The youngest in the office, Lesley thinks she can roll with the big dogs, until she
realizes she stuck as home while everyone else parties. As she waits for that 21st
birthday, Lesley spends countless hours wasting her money at Forever 21. But don’t
get this girl twisted, with her Chi-town attitude and Arizona State cred, this intern
hopes to one day be broadcasting for the entertainment world.
Maritza Guerrero intern ________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________Maritza has a soft spot for booty bass, junk food and anything gold plated. She
can be found rollin’ with the homies, boozing and schmoozing, and overdosing on
Mexican candy. Maritza’s favorite past time and talent is being able to nap anytime
and anywhere. With her skills in communication, aka running her mouth on anything
and everything, she hopes to acquire a career in the PR field.
You Gotta Love What You Do
� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �
HEARSAY
Although the clamor of celebrity-
riddled fundraisers has long been
silenced, the destruction from the devastating
earthquake that destroyed Haiti some 5
months ago has ensured that the poorest
country in the Western Hemisphere will
experience generational desolation. In what
has since become a small dose of good news
for Haiti, The World Bank has decided to
wipe out the 36-million dollar debt owed
to the International Development Agency.
Contributions from Belgium, Canada, Finland,
France, Germany, Ireland, Italy, Japan, The
Netherlands, Norway, Spain, Sweden, and
Switzerland ensured the debt was wiped clean.
McDonald’s stirred up some controversy last
month when their French offices launched
a commercial that featured a homosexual
character. In the commercial, a young man is
having lunch with his dad. He is speaking on
his cell phone and telling someone, “I miss
you.” We find out later that the young man
is talking to another young man and dear
old dad doesn’t know his son is gay. The ad
is part of the “Come As You Are” campaign.
The video has already received millions of
views virally. Anyone else think this is way to
heavy for a place that serves something called
McNuggets?<
Rattle Me BonesIf you wince at Dr.
90210 removing a little
bone and cartilage in a routine
rhinoplasty then you would
absolutely gag about the 19
surgeries a man has had to
extract 42 bones from his
body over the course of
his life. But this man is not
removing ribs to be more svelte,
or whittling away at perceived
imperfections, he’s got 50 more bones in his body than the
average person. He suffers from MHE, multiple hereditary
exostoses, and that means he has been growing extra
bones all over his body since the age of 5.
Never sign a contract in Mexico. A frightened matador ran like hell away from a
bull in the ring after a few minutes of
cape taunting and was greeted with a
pair of handcuffs. He was arrested for
breach of contract for doing what
any normal person wearing sparkly
pants and hot pink socks while
toting a scarlet red cape in the
presence of an angry bull would
do. Rough.
What’s up, Teach? A 16 year old girl in Germany is
being sued for bullying her
teacher. And what
was the offense?
She convinced a
schoolmate to draw
a rabbit on the
blackboard to scare
their teacher who flips
out at the sight of the cute
little nose wigglers. The girl
could be fined as much as $7400 for giving all the kids
something to laugh at. How sad.
One man crime spree in Dayton, Ohio fueled by Mad Dog 20/20! It seems as though the frosty malt beverage is the drink
of choice for one Ohioan who began his day of crime at
5:30am by trying to crack open an ATM with
a rock. He then shoplifted a
few packages of meat and
aforementioned alcoholic
delight and stole a CO2
tank from a neighborhood
restaurant. Sounds like
someone misses high school.
Is it gay to fantasize about dippin’ your nuggets into another man’s sauce?
This is obviously why Haiti can’t have nice things.
words by Alexis Amparan & Katie Evans
� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
ForePLay
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 9
INFORMER
RESTORING A HOLLYwOOD LANDMARkIan Shepp Unlocks The New key Clubwords by Alex mendoza
DUI checkpoint in Virginia yields 82 citations, 3 drunk
drivers and a really pissed off goat. Some complete moron was cited for
transporting a live goat in her trunk.
The poor beast was found when police
heard it kicking and writhing in the
woman’s trunk. No doubt she saw the Rob
& Big where the mini-horse ‘did work’ in
their car. But honestly, that’s just a case of
baaaaaaaad judgement.
A 2 a.m., post baptism party …In New Jersey ended in the dispatching of two men
to the Lord above. This charming, circle-of-life, tale is
no work of fiction. Two men, who were celebrating
the baptism of a friend’s child, were stabbed to death
after arguing with another group of people at a Mexican
restaurant. Wow, New Jersey. What’s in the holy water?
Dude, that’s not your car! While it’s too late to stop
the Pennsylvania man who
broke the window of the
wrong Jeep Cherokee,
it’s not too late to laugh
about why he did it. When
Chase Fitzgerald couldn’t get
into his car because his key
‘wasn’t working’ he took a
rock to the vehicle window to
get inside. The astute 24 year old
now owes $2500 in damages to the
real owner of the damaged Jeep. But,
at least he won’t have to re-key his
own Cherokee.
Stand Your Ground Unless you are in the direct path of a 26 ton truck driven
by your drunken husband and you’ve just exchanged some
fightin’ words. A 58 year old woman from Newcastle was
run over and killed by her husband
who was trying to ram down the gate
of their property to leave. When he
called for emergency assistance
he was quoted as
saying, “I thought she
would f***ing move
out of the
way, but she
didn’t”. Well,
you know
what they
say about
assumptions.
HEARSAYCONTINUED...
Every fable has its origin and The Key
Club is no stranger to legend. The venue
was home to a bevy of powerhouse musical
acts/artists that attracted a variety of denizens
– local and foreign - to the Sunset Strip. At the
latter end of 2009 The Key Club closed its
doors, feeling the effects of a declining economy.
It was an unexpected blow to the Sunset Strip
given its status in the social conscience, as well
as its place in music history.
Enter Ian Shepp – a man who regards
Hollywood as more than tourism, but home. It
comes as no surprise that he is resurrecting the
legendary club with grand ambitions to rekindle
the flame that made The Key Club amongst the
top venues in the nation.
Q: Most people tend to stick with something
a little more “stable” in respects to career
choices. Keeping this in mind, what sparked the
interest for you to pursue this path?
I have always loved seeing people have a good
time. In today’s current economic crisis, I
would say entertainment is one of the more
stable career choices. Everyone needs an outlet,
to get away from their daily routine.
Q: What are some of your views of the club
scene currently? What do you feel works
and what are some aspects of it that you find
disconcerting?
Nowadays, everything must be recreated
regularly. In the past, a club could last for a
decade. Now it’s turned into a game of keeping
up with the joneses. What I feel works is
the avenue that I have decided to take, LIVE
MUSIC!
Q: What are some of the biggest changes you’ve
seen from when you first started to where you
are now in respects to the way the industry has
changed to cater to customers?
I think the “Velvet Rope” approach is the
death of countless venues. I am aware that the
customers are the reason we are open. This is
why at the Key Club we allow all people who
want to have a good time and blow off some
steam to attend. Within that format, we have
still been able to create programs that also allow
high profile clientele to be accommodated.
Q: It would seem most of the week you have a
weekly resident act stopping by; from acts like
Steel Panther and the Spazmatics, or even DJ
Quik stopping by once a month. How do you
keep up?
I have a great staff and tremendous support from
my wife - everyone around me is committed to
making the club a success. We’re driven by our
determination to deliver the type of acts our
audiences want to see and hear, and ultimately
we’re just focused on keeping The Key Club
alive and thriving and continuing the legacy of
the Sunset Strip.
Q: What are you hoping people take away from
this new version of The Key Club?
We want to continue to be a part of history.
The live music scene has changed, but when
done right, it’s still one of the best quality
experiences you can get for a night out.<
Read the full interview online at
Skinniemagazine.com
�0 • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
FoREplAy
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
INFORMER
GrossNo one wants to see a 47 year
old woman breast feeding an
18 month old child. And the
German police officer who
did see this really awful event
was also compelled by the law
to fine her. Not that public
breast feeding is illegal here
or there (and why not?!) but
it certainly poses a safety hazard
when done while commanding a vehicle.
Yeah, apparently the little milk breath couldn’t WAIT to get
home and demanded the boob.
First it was “DJ Pauly D”…Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino of the infamous
Jersey Shore on MTV is now releasing his own
rap, adequately titled “The Situation Rap”. In
addition, he’s starting his own fragrance line and
endorsing Vitamin Water. So, now you
can smell like a tool while drinking
liquid advertised by a tool while
listening to music by a tool.
Maybe even while doing
crunches in a tanning bed
so you can pretty much be
a tool altogether.
You’re Gonna Love My NutsShamWow informercial guru Vince Shlomi has made
another infomercial… for Eminem’s latest album, Recovery.
The rapper enlisted the advertising help of Shlomi,
who made a spinoff of his Slap Chop and ShamWow
commercials, suggesting uses for the album such as
coasters, or as a tomato-smashing device. Thrown in was
the bonus ShamPon, free with purchase. Any guesses to
what that does?
Debbie Swords Los Angeles: 8A porn actor, Stephen Clancy Hill (“Steve Driver”), was
suspected of killing a fellow
porn star and had a warrant
for his arrest for that and
for attacking other actors
on one of the film sets. He
fled from the police and was
cornered to a cliff, where
SWAT officers attempted to
coerce him from the edge.
Armed with a SWORD from
the porn set, he let himself
fall from the hill to his death
instead of getting arrested.
Seriously though, what
was this sword doing in a
porn?<
HEARSAYCONTINUED...
wHOA, MAN! wOMEN CHEAT TOO!men Are Jerks, women Are Just Passionate Apparently
I don’t know that there will ever be
another published piece in history
that uses a quote from Tracy Morgan to kick
things off, but during an interview on the
Howard Stern Radio Show, Mr. Morgan said
something I found painfully insightful. “Women
love money, men love freedom…I never seen
a man fuck someone for a fur coat.” In the
wake of private exploits turning into media
spectacles for guys like Tiger Woods and
Jesse James, the fallout would suggest Morgan
is right, but women, like men, sometimes
cheat just because their crotches tell them
to. Yet there seems to be some inequality.
Men continue to be vilified and the women
involved become media darlings. I’m NOT
justifying adultery, not defending philandering,
but consider this. An affair typically consists of
TWO willing participants. For some of these
celebrities, hiding the fact they are married
is not an option. It could be easily asserted
that women like the attention whores Tiger
slipped up with, and the piece of work known
as “Bombshell” Magee were actively seeking to
cash in. But what about the women who have
committed adultery and not face even half the
scrutiny we have seen as of late for the male
contemporaries. Need some reminders?
Madonna – now, this is all still alleged, but
while still married to Guy Ritchie, the Queen
of Pop was going back to her “Bedtime
Stories” days and spending late nights with
New York Yankee Alex Rodriguez.
Elizabeth Taylor – revered as one of
Hollywood’s most treasured personalities,
Taylor was busted not once, but TWICE.
While married to Michael Wilding in 1956,
Taylor started creeping with film producer
Michael Todd. In ’63, Taylor was married to
Eddie Fisher but humping Richard Burton.
Jennifer Lopez – not only did “Jenny from
the Block” step out on her then husband
Cris Judd, she decided to taint the world of
pop culture with the saga of “Bennifer.” She
continues to plague society with shitty music
and movies.
Angelina Jolie –easily one of Hollywood’s
most overrated, overpaid actresses, Jolie
admitted to snaking Brad Pitt from Jennifer
Aniston. No one questions her when its time
to adopt yet another kid.
Tori Spelling – is married to Dean
McDermott now, but allegedly began seeing
him while married to another dude named
Charlie Shanian. What resulted??? A successful
reality TV show career.
Brittney Spears – now even though we
got the epic Justin Timberlake track “Cry Me
A River” out of it, Spears allegedly stepped
out on JT with a choreographer named Wade
Robson. Brittney’s overnight husband Jason
Alexander also admitted to sampling some
Brittney while she was still with Timberlake.
Each of these women continue to maintain
healthy, lucrative careers. Would it be the
same if they were men? Let’s hear what you
have to say – Sound off!<
�� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
FoREplAy
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
21
4
3
5
BE ThE Playa’ ON ThE PlaygrOUNDor at Least Look Like you Have Good taste.
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Apple 4G iPhone
Let’s be honest, if you
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More than keeping up
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Improved battery life,
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$199-299apple.com
Ghostbusters Proton Pack
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Lamb Of God “Hourglass”
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�4 • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
TOYS
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �5
FrenCH rivierathe City of Gold
words by Elysia McMahan
Welcome to the playground intended for
the world’s population of millionaires and
those auspicious enough to spoil themselves in
an exquisite vacation. Saint-Tropez (Sant Tropetz,
“St. Trop”) is a settlement in southeastern France
that definitely presents itself as more than just a
cozy little seaside town. Positioned on the divine
cobalt waters of the medieval Bay of Saint-Tro-
pez, this is someplace that hypnotizes you without
first asking your permission. Strolling tourists and
unhurried posh cars parade alongside patio cafés
and freely roaming yachts floating throughout the
harbor that silhouette themselves during some of
the most stunning mid-evening sunsets. It contin-
ues to be a remedy for the American and European
elite, as well as those seeking out a slight morsel of
Provincial authenticity and elegant lavender fields.
Brigitte Bardot once adorned its avenues and bou-
levards, which are now lined with trademark stores
and socialites. Since the 1920’s Saint-Tropez has
been quite the phenomenon. Apart from the top-
drawer nightlife and superior shopping, there are
also forty hush-hush beaches distributed along this
persuading locality that impart and support seduc-
tive moods. And hands down…it is one of the most
well appointed cities in the South of France. A true
retreat from the ordinary.
Everything is FamousFrom as far back as the 1860’s, writers and artists
DESTINATION
PassPort
�� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
have fallen under the magical charm of this little
port town setting and Saint-Tropez turned into “St.
Trop”. In the past, one could collide with the likes
of Francoise Sagan, Jacques Prévert, and Picasso.
Small rounded paving stone streets escort visitors
and residents alike through alleys sheltering some
the most elegant galleries, restaurants, hotels and
shops. The town’s name actually stems from that of
an early, renowned martyr, Saint Torpes. Legend has
it that Torpes was beheaded at Pisa during Nero’s
supremacy and that his cadaver was set in a decayed
boat with a dog and a rooster (both symbols of
malevolence during that time). His remains settled
somewhere near the current location of the town.
The diverse atmosphere and untailored ambiance
unifies classily with the impressive backdrops situat-
ed everywhere you turn. With the influx of Brigitte
Bardot in the movie “And God Created Woman”
during the 1960’s, this fable-like location became
stable in its establishment. Beside the international
jetsetters and well-dressed Parisians that garnish
this vacation hot spot, movie stars and local stars
assemble at Place des Lices and drink Pastis beneath
the flat trees in between games of Boules (similar
to bocce ball).
Besides the Water SportsNear the beginning of the morning, during first light,
you can find unsullied fruits, flowers, vegetables and
fresh fish up for sale at the Place aux Herbes and
Place des Lices. Usual Provengal markets take place
each Tuesday and Saturday morning down the street
from the well-known brasseries of Le Gorille and
Sénéquier. Festive religious/militant demonstrations
called Les Bravades des Espagnols commences in
May and carries on until June 15th. This is a re-
membrance and celebration of the victory of the
Tropezian mercenaries over the Spanish.
There are also opportunities to hike and cycle, but
the most celebrated past time seems to purely be
people watching. People are inclined to want to see
or be seen throughout this tourist Mecca. One of
the things to love about the French Riviera is that
beauty doesn’t only belong to the young. In Saint
Tropez, women of all ages – into their 60s, 70s and
80s still wear the latest fashions and look damn
good doing it! Guests wish to park themselves at
the open-air cafés, eager to be seen or, in fact, to see
someone who is more than just TMZ worthy. One
of the most famous sidewalk cafes in Saint Tropez is
The Senequier.
It appears that competition among the rich is prev-
alent, especially among those with massive yachts.
They line their vessels up in the harbor challenging
to perceive which is the most beautiful, best kept or
has the sexiest crew on board. Do you have what it
takes? It is quite a sight to observe. Only beautiful
people hop on board. Well, depending on what your
idea of what “beautiful” may be.
Travelers can also visit the nautical museum of the
Citadel, with its town walls and gates. It sits on a hill
overlooking the city, and is one of the best places
to take photos and get a bird’s eye view of the en-
tire landscape. Ramatuelle is the picturesque hill
village and grave to actor Gérard Philipe. If you’re
interested in seeing some works of art from cre-
ators of which have worked and lived in St Tropez
then you’ll have to make your way out to Musée
de l’Annonciade. A few of the remarkable artists
whose compositions grace this museum are: Signac,
Derain, van Dongen, Rouault, Braque, Bonnard, Ma-
tisse and Maillol.
The House of Butterflies, created by Dany Lartigue,
son of the famous photographer Jacques-Henri Lar-
tigue, is an amazing museum housing over 20,000
butterflies. This collection includes several now-ex-
tinct or protected species, and others that are rari-
ties or abnormalities. Also, there’s a tremendously
important collection of exotic species from the
Solomon Islands and Amazonia on display that have
been called “The most beautiful butterflies in the
world.”
St. Tropez’s genuine temperament can truly be
cherished in the off months when there are fewer
crowds and you can seize the moment to regard
the inviting alleys and avenues. You’ll love the nar-
row, winding streets.
If You Have Ever WantedTo Go Topless…Hedonistic behav-
ior is the way to go
upon the various
shorelines. The most
outrageous and hot-
test Riviera beaches
of Saint-Tropez are
situated along Pam-
pelonne. La Voile
Rouge, is undoubt-
edly the victor when
it comes to the ex-
hibition of beach go-
ers. Parents are strongly cautioned to leave their
children on the playground equipment at Plage des
Jumeaux when treating themselves to such a delight.
The infamously decadent Plage de Tahiti resides in
the north end of the 3 ½ mile Pampelonne. These
slivers of golden sand, like particles in an hourglass,
are favored by exhibitionists, whom brazenly wear
nothing or next to nothing. So, if you have ever had
the desire to go topless, well, this is the place to do
it! Bouillabaisse Beach, Caneliers Beach and Salins
Beach also outline the peninsula. You’ll need a bike,
car or scooter in order to succeed in reaching the
beach from town and once you arrive, you can ex-
pect parking to go for about $4.95 a day. The myriad
of restaurants, concessions, and cafés adjacent to
these salient sun-soaked vicinities are adequate
enough to hold anyone over. Yes, even if you feel you
haven’t gotten your fill of ass and boobies by the
time the sun cascades below the horizon.
Subsequent to MidnightAn American from Miami maintains one of the
foremost venues (Nikki Beach) you’re likely to
find in the south of France if you’re looking for
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
that uninhibited, chaotic, and unruly experience.
Also flourishing are Plage de Pampelonne and Le
Club. Along with cash-only clubs and spring break
style amusement, late night dancing and pre-dawn
carousing requests can be fulfilled at Les Caves
du Roy, located in Hôtel Byblos. Soon after mak-
ing it inside, the yawning furnishings may surprise
you, particularly since admission is free. But if you
sincerely want to come in contact with the finest
dance club in town, La Bodega de Papagayo starts
getting diligent after midnight, with its ambience of
elevated energy. Ensembles perform nightly within
these two rooms; one being a bustling bar and the
other a lively dance floor. Look forward to a hot,
sweaty night, because amid the gang of guests and
the music – Papagayo’s can get a little rowdy. Oc-
tave Café offers an altogether different vibe. And
although you are just as likely to see some sort of
celebrity within its castle-like walls, the mood, with
its jazz oriented background music, is far more laid
back than most clubs.
Capture the EssenceDespite its glitzy reputation, St Tropez still retains
something of an old world character. Known for
its role in the liberation of southern France dur-
ing World War II, this international tourist hub’s
storybook allure has played a considerable part in
the notoriety of the entire Côte d’ Azur. Extraor-
dinary views of the Mediterranean Sea, neighboring
mountain ranges and the Citadel can all be taken in
from just about anywhere. Being relatively near to
the remainder of France and northern Italy, Saint-
Tropez makes for a pleasant day trip, that is, if it
doesn’t lure you in and keep you there. One must
sample some of the dishes that are particularly
famous in the region, such as bouillabaisse with a
glass of burgundy or bourdeaux from one of the
many well-known French vineyards. The village also
boasts various types of accommodation such as
luxury hotels, magnificent villas and character ho-
tels. It is recommended that you rent a villa rather
than booking a hotel because even if at first glance
villas appear expensive, they are usually capable of
housing quite a few people. The summer months
turn this city into quite the zoo. But if you plan on
coming during this time, it’s worth fighting the wall-
to-wall people and the traffic. Eternal perspectives
of gorgeousness and the standard of living of this
resort town will absolutely win in its conquest for
your attention and for votre cœur (your heart).
Considering this seaside village is famous more for
its multitude of shops and restaurants than its his-
torical significance, there are plenty of possibilities
for buying gifts that shout such phrases as “I love
Saint-Tropez!” There’s no doubt about it. Anyone
who feels destined to unearth a place of unrivaled
beauty and take part in self-indulgence should find
themselves here at some point. Hollywood comes
to Saint-Tropez, but all you have to do is believe
that you deserve the best this life has to offer in
order to find yourself here. You get more of what-
ever you focus on.
Vis! Ris! Aime!<
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pASSpoRT
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �9
FuLL ContaCt
WhEN NaTUral TalENT,MEETs all OUT hUsTlE Plan B Phenom Ryan Sheckler Loves Going To Work
words by: Patrick Douglas photos by: Jeff Farsai
�0 • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
WhEN NaTUral TalENT,MEETs all OUT hUsTlE Plan B Phenom Ryan Sheckler Loves Going To Work
words by: Patrick Douglas photos by: Jeff Farsai
Ryan Sheckler has become a refreshing
reminder that it is possible to mix humility
and fame in professional sports and not come up
with a concoction reeking of selfishness and a lust
for personal glory. Ask him about the rejuvenation
of professional skateboarding and his part of the
turnaround and he’ll tell you he’s just another guy
having fun on a board. Despite excelling at the sport
since his age was still measured in single-digits, having
dominated worldwide competition before turning
twenty and starring on a reality show about his
adventures, Sheckler doesn’t think he deserves too
much credit for what he’s done for the image of
skateboarding.
“I don’t consider myself a key part of the rejuvenation
(of skating),” says Sheckler. “I think maybe we brought
kids into it or maybe kids realized that they could
skate and they could do something outside of their
normal basketball, baseball, football world. When you
look at skateboarding as a whole, it’s always thrived.
Skateboarders have always stuck together. I think if
anything, me and P-Rod and Rob (Dyrdek) are just
a few names who have done a lot for skateboarding.
We kind of just look at it as we’re just working to
keep skateboarding cool and keep it awesome. I
don’t wanna be credited for having tried to make
skateboarding better. I’m just living my life, doing what
God wants me to do – skating my skateboard.”
Besides, skateboarding has always been about
individualism and not so much about wearing
someone’s jersey or cheering for a specific team.
According to Sheckler, it’s that fact that makes it
easy to see why one person cannot be credited
with sparking the popularity of the sport as a
whole. For the most part, kids who prefer skating to
tossing around a football are inspired by the actual
skateboard more than the people who have mastered
it. “The kids have a mind of their own and if they pick
up a skateboard, no matter who’s doing it, they’re
gonna do whatever they wanna do,” he said. “The
youth is amazing. I love doing everything I can to help
kids and kind of mentor our kids into anything they
wanna do whether it’s school or skateboarding or
riding bikes, it doesn’t really matter. Anything a kid
wants to do, they should be able to do it. That’s what
our future is.”
Speaking of kids, it wasn’t too long ago that Sheckler
could be described as still being one. This is a kid
who was doing ollies at age four, before even hitting
kindergarten. By the time he turned seven, he was
working a ramp in his backyard. He really turned
heads in the industry when he was a mere 13-years-
old, winning numerous gold medals and first place
accolades on tour, including a legendary first X-
Games where he was the only skater that year to
hit every trick. To say “prodigy” would be obvious
and somewhat rudimentary. Let’s just say he was a
once-in-a-generation wunderkind. He’s so fresh that
he lists 25-year-old Paul Rodriguez Jr. (another one
who’s been doing it since he was in diapers) as the
skater he admired most when he was growing up.
“As far as the sport goes ... I always looked up to Paul
because he was close to my age and he was so skilled
and so advanced that I wanted to be like P-Rod. I
(also) looked up to Danny Way and Tony Hawk and
I really looked up to Rodney Mullen and I still do. I
don’t get to see him that much. He’s the one dude I
still get a little nervous around when I’m around him.
It’s pretty awesome.”
The older generation has taken note of what’s
going on in today’s sport. Tony Alva helped lay the
foundation for skating as we know it and has referred
to Sheckler as being “super-versatile and a good
skateboarder.” Those words don’t just bounce off
of the 20-year-old phenom unnoticed. He takes it
to heart when he hears something like that coming
from skating royalty. “I just got chills when (Alva) said
that. I recently saw Tony Alva at the airport and it was
just really cool because I had my back kind of turned
and I was going to the baggage claim and he saw me
first and was like ‘Ryan.’ I was like ‘Damn, what’s up
Tony? How you doing?’ and we just talked for a little
bit and it’s just so cool that the first generation of
skateboarding, the ones that made it possible for us
to do what we can do today and get paid and actually
live a great life from skateboarding, those dudes are
legends – absolute legends – and the fact that they
are still so involved in the way skateboarding goes,
they have a huge say in everything, it’s awesome to
even be recognized by those dudes.”
With the X-Games set to begin this month, Sheckler
is anxious to get out there and compete. Unlike other
sports where the goal is to take someone else out on
the way to victory, the men on top of the sport of
skateboarding are all about camaraderie and sharing
the experience. “It’s pretty awesome actually to be in
a contest of that nature with your Chris Cole’s and
your P-Rod’s and Muska, the guys that I looked up
to when I started skateboarding. I had a real early
opportunity to skate with all of these guys (so) when
I go out and I see these guys, I don’t look at them
as ‘Oh, these guys are the gnarliest competition,’
which they are, but the way that I’ve grown up with
them I’m like ‘Ah, cool, I’m at another contest with
my homies and we’re about to have some serious
fun.’” Even though it’s all about fun, Sheckler goes
into X-Games competition prepared and aiming to
come away with the gold, something he’s done twice
in previous X-Games. “I try and go into a contest
like a warrior, man. Like a complete soldier. I love
competing. Competing has always been one of the
most fun things for me to do and when I do compete,
I get into a different mode. It might seem like I’m a
little quiet, a little bit to myself, but that’s just me.
Focused and ready to attack.”
Because these types of contests aren’t focused around
individual tricks, as opposed to a series of them,
there’s really no need to reinvent the wheel when
it comes to X-Games. For Sheckler, it’s a matter of
keeping his mechanics smooth and his fundamentals
sharp. “These contests have changed from a best trick
format. It’s how many tricks you can land and how
consistent you can be doing your hardest tricks,” he
said. “Yeah, there’s tricks that I work on that I know
when my adrenaline level gets to a certain point that
I can just throw it down and I have no worries about
that. I keep it mellow. I do all my tricks. I try to do
every trick I know how to do when I go skate and
just keep everything polished up to be consistent and
be enjoyable to watch.”
Sheckler, who tore ligaments in his foot at last year’s
X-Games and needed to have screws inserted, says
that the hardest stunt he’s attempted is merely
avoiding broken bones with every flip of the board or
slide down a rail. “It’s still a stunt and it’s still hard to
not (break bones) and I’m just trying not to do that,”
he said “I don’t limit myself. I plan on learning as many
tricks as I can in the years I have left in skateboarding
and whatever I do with those tricks, that’s what it is. I
don’t have any plans to do anything crazy. I’m just kind
of living and just skating and doing my thing.”
Pro skaters are reaping the benefits of having a
slew of sponsors and outlets for clothing lines out
there, similar to what professional golfers have been
enjoying for years. Being one of the premiere partners
with Plan B, Sheckler is living the good life. “It’s great.
Seriously, it’s such a blessing to be a professional
skateboarder and to have ventures like that and to
have my own foundation and the Plan B thing,” he said.
“It’s crazy because I never expected all this. I never
asked for all this. I was just skating because it was fun
and that’s how I’m skating today just because it’s so
fun and so exciting to learn a new trick and skating
with your boys and homies (as they) land some tricks.
It’s a feeling that you can’t match. It’s hard to explain.
Having all these business ventures is great. I’m super
psyched and I wanna just keep it going.”
With so much already under his belt and yet not old
enough to buy beer, Sheckler still has an elusive goal
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
FUllCoNTACT
set within his profession. “My plans have included
getting the Thrasher Skater of the Year, which
is pretty much the dopest award you can get in
skateboarding,” he said. “It means you put in the
most work on the streets. That’s been a goal for
awhile. Whether that happens this year, next year,
three years from now, it doesn’t really matter to me
just as long as in my career I can get Thrasher Skater
of the Year. That’s my main goal. Other than that, just
keep coming out to my great foundation events for
the kids and for the hurt athletes.”
As skating grows in popularity by the day, it’s
apparent that the allure of such an independent
sport is striking a chord with the youth who are
disenfranchised with team activities. “We’re taking
over, man,” Sheckler joked. “Skateboarders are
taking over.”<
�� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
“I try and go into a contest like a warrior, man. Like a complete
soldier... Competing has always been
one of the most fun things for me
to do and when I do compete, I get into a different
mode...
...Focused and Ready To
Attack.” - Ryan Sheckler
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
FUllCoNTACT
JOlENE vaN vUgTaNThONy NaPOlITaNWhat was your defining X Games moment thus far?
My moment was definitely being the first person
to do a double front flip.
Who do you see as being the biggest competition for you this year? The big vert dogs like McCann, Kagy, and Robinson
are always the biggest competition.
What does bringing home the Gold in X Games mean to you? I would be so stoked if I could bring a gold medal
home from X Games. It’s always been a dream of
mine and I want to make it come true.
X Games has been called the biggest platform for Action
Sports...do you agree? There has definitely been a fair share of crazy
never before done tricks preformed at X Games.
I think that it’s the biggest contest of the year and
all the riders know it. That’s why they all go crazy
when it’s their turn to ride.
What runs through your mind in those seconds before a run? Nothing really. I know that my time is coming
soon, so I take a deep breath and relax as much
as possible.
How do you plan to make the crowds and the judges remember you? I’m just gonna lay it down!
Who else are you stoked to
compete with/against? Pretty much everyone on the roll in. I think we all
enjoy each other’s company on that big roll in.
Do you have any regrets from previous years that you want to shake at this year’s games? Yeah this is my redemption year from last year. I’m
gonna stick the double fronty again and pop off a
good trick on the quarter pipe.
Being that you compete all year round, what about the X Games gets you especially hyped? Well, Mega ramp has become something that I
love to ride. X Games is the only place that I can
actually ride mega ramp. So I get pretty hyped to
just get on the ramp again.<www.twitter.com/anthonynapo
ANTHONY NAPOLITAN - BMXAs a trendsetter (with his tire grab to bar spin front flip and no-hander front flip variations), this 24-year-old made history during
the 2009 X-Games when he landed the first-ever double front flip during the Big Air Competition. Surveying other riders, such
as Jamie Bestwick, has assisted Napolitan in determining his own methods and approach. With the exception of spending most
of his time practicing at Woodward, some of his preferred jumps are found at veteran Cory Nastazio’s house or Lavin’s backyard.
More often than not he get his tricks down within the first couple of tries. He goes for it. Far from his hometown in Youngstown,
Ohio, this leading light in the BMX showground has been all around the world…with no plans on bringing his traveling to an end
anytime soon.
Let the GameS BeGinMeet Some Of The Faces Destined For X Games Glory
�4 • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
JOlENE vaN vUgTWhat was your defining X Games moment thus far?
Being invited
Who do you see as being the biggest competition for you this year?Myself, last year I got in my own way, I do that a
lot with racing.
What does bringing home the Gold in X Games mean to you?For me being invited to be a part of the event is
a major deal, bringing home a metal would put
me over the moon and be a first for a Canadian
female racer.
X Games has been called the biggest platform for Action Sports...do you agree?
Yes, for sure. It’s huge for Women’s SX, It has such
great exposure and really puts the sport and the
women out there for the mainstream to see.
What runs through your mind in those seconds before the gate drops?I take deep breaths and try to stay calming, my
heart is usually racing and I want to puke... I’m
just focused on trying to get a good start and
get out in the front of the pack, with it being a
fairly short race there isn’t a lot of time to make
mistakes and make up for them later.
How do you plan to make the crowds remember you?Just go out there and give it my best, that’s all I
can do.
Who else are you stoked to
compete with/against?I haven’t raced against a lot of these girls in a
while so I’m just pumped to get out there in the
mix with them all, Ashley, Tarah, Jessica, Sherri they
are all great talents.
Do you have any regrets from previous years that you want to shake at this year’s games?Last year I was unable to compete in the race, I
broke my wrist training 3 weeks before the event.
Being that you compete all year round, what about the X Games gets you especially hyped?X Games is a very unique race for the women,
one of it’s kind and only 10 women are invited to
participate, it’s a pretty big honor.<www.jolenevanvugt.com
JOLENE VAN VUGT - SUPERCROSSLike an anchor - she’s grounded, but not held down
or held back from anything. Her immeasurable
accomplishments have pushed the envelope on
women’s action sports and by following her dream
racing dirt bikes, she has paved the way to success.
Having the chance to travel the world with Travis
Pastrana and the Nitro Circus crew has unlocked
scores of opportunities for the 28-year-old Canadian
Motocross National Champion. With such sponsors
as DC Shoe Company, Pro Circuit, Fox, Rockstar, and
Suzuki (just to name a few), she has maintained the
name she constructed for herself back in 2006. Aside
from being the first female to execute a back flip
over a 60 ft. ramp, she is also the holder of several
Guinness World Records and the co-star in various
motocross videos.
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �5
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DUaNE PETErs
What was your defining X Games moment thus far?
Just stoked to Ride with all these insanely Rad
Skaters
Who do you see as being the biggest competition for you this year?I’m Really Not Looking at it Like that, My competing
days are far and few between, I’m probably going
to be the oldest cat out there and just want to
make a good showing and skate the best I can. But
Christian hosoi,caballerro,and T-hawk if he is in are
going to be the ones to watch as far as masters go.
What does bringing home the Gold in X Games mean to you?Its Never Entered my mind.
X Games has been called the biggest platform for Action Sports...do you agree?If that’s what they say I’m sure it is.
What runs through your mind in those seconds before a run?What am I going to hit first ?
How do you plan to make the crowds and the judges remember you?Giving Them Blood.
Who else are you stoked to compete with/against?Salba,he’s Really the only other last one from my
Generation.
Do you have any regrets from previous years that you want to shake at this year’s games?I would like to get some more practice in this year,
I’ve been on with band in previous years, and just
getting home from sitting in the van a month and
strapping on your gear with not a lot of practice
and not on My A Game in the past was Rough.
Being that you compete all year round, what about the X Games gets you especially hyped?The fact that it is such a huge deal it brings up all
the adrenalin in all the skaters and the audience so
the levels are always pushed to max.<www.duanepeters.net
DUANE PETERS - SKATEConsidered one of the last remaining
ambassadors of old school skateboarding,
Peters is not only still competing, but
continues to carry the punk rock flag
the sport has become synonymous with.
Fronting U.S. Bombs, among the various
other punk projects (Gunfight) he provides
lyrical fuel for, Peters has never left his
bread and butter – the skateboard. An
innovator in the sport, Peters is credited
with inventing several moves including the
“Indy Air,” the “Sweeper,” the “Fakie Hang-
Up” aka the “Disaster,” and was the first
to skate the “Loop of Death.”
�� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
lyN-z aDaMsWhat was your defining X Games moment thus far?
My first Gold in 2004 when I was 14
Who do you see as being the biggest competition for you this year?All the girls were killing it last year! Karen Jonz
has a ton of tricks and Gaby Ponce is going sooo
high!
What does bringing home the Gold in X Games mean to you?I have never repeated Gold and that would be so
awesome! but when it comes down to it for me its
about how well I skate not were I place.
X Games has been called the biggest platform for Action Sports...do you agree?
Yes and no... its invite so there is no knowing really
without qualifying events .
What runs through your mind in those seconds before a run?“Ok I got this... I can do this!” and then probably
some lines and run that im remembering to do
haha.
How do you plan to make the crowds and the judges remember you?I wanna skate my best and just up the bar for
woman’s vert skating .
Who else are you stoked to compete with/against?All the girls are rad! its cool to have women like
Cara Beth Burnside and Mimi Knoop who I look
up to, then the girls who are closer to my age like
Karen Jonz and Gaby Ponce, and who could forget
the groms with such bright futures like Allysha
Bergado and Lea Taylor in there... its an awesome
mix.
Do you have any regrets from previous years that you want to shake at this year’s games?There are some tricks im hoping to do this year
for sure!
Being that you compete all year round, what about the X Games gets you especially hyped?X games is the biggest event, its a mix of some
many different sports witch is really amazing to be
a part of, its pretty special to be able to hang with
the different athletes and cheer each other on in
our different sports.<www.lyn-zadams.com
LYN-Z ADAMS - SKATEA competitive surfer by the age of nine and notorious skater at thirteen,
Lyn-Z hasn’t just limited herself to one branch of the athletic world. With
such sponsors as Nixon, Volcom, DC Shoes, and Type-S Wheels, she has
used her talent to her advantage and engaged herself in every one of her
passions, including snowboarding during the winter season. She is the first
female to hit the nine story tall DC Mega Ramp and land successfully.
Anyone who can benefit from adversity is worth becoming a legend and
practicing alongside such intellects as Lasek and Hawk have certainly
molded her award-winning style and launched her into dominating female
skateboarding as a fierce competitor. Kick Flip Indy Grabs, Backside
Nollies, and Rocket to Fakie 360’s have showcased her remarkable runs.
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
BrIaN DEEgaNWhat was your defining X Games
moment thus far?
My X Game defining moment would have to be
doing the very first 360 degree on a dirt bike and
landing it to win the gold.
Who do you see as being the biggest
competition for you this year?
I’m really looking forward to competing against
everyone, but my biggest competition will be
always be Travis Pastrana and Ken Block in rally
car.
What does bringing home the Gold in X
Games mean to you?
It means the sense of accomplishment,
accomplishing a goal that’s always there for me.
X Games has been called the biggest
platform for Action Sports...do you
agree?
Yes-I would say X Games is the biggest platform
for action sports-it’s been what’s helped build
the team and grow the Metal Mulisha. It’s been a
huge launching point for motocross and the Metal
Mulisha team.
What runs through your mind in those
seconds before a run?
I always am focusing on the tricks or the course-
running through the upcoming run in my head,
trying to visualize it and block out any other
distraction. I usually listen to music and get amped
up before going.
How do you plan to make the crowds
and the judges remember you?
Pumping up the crowd is something our team has
always been good at-we have a fun image and what
we say, the things we do-we do our own thing and
sometimes break rules.
Who else are you stoked to compete
with/against?
My teammate- Jeremy Twitch Stenberg, I train with
him everyday and am going to compete against
him in Speed and Style. I’m really just excited to
challenge everyone.
Do you have any regrets from previous
years that you want to shake at this
year’s games?
Last year-rally car, I should have won a medal. I
over-jumped the jump and crashed-it’s bugged me
for about a year, and I’m excited to come back and
try to win that event.
Being that you compete all year round,
what about the X Games gets you
especially hyped?
All the hard work that goes into that one weekend-
all of the preparation and having all the fans and
the crowd there that watch you-I wonder why I’m
the guy on the floor being watched, and it’s really
exciting and crazy to think about.<www.briandeegan.com
BRIAN DEEGAN - MOTOCROSS/RALLY CARSince winning the 125cc main back in 1997 and founding Metal
Mulisha, motocross icon Brian Deegan has won 10 X-Games medals
and founded the Rockstar/Metal Mulisha/Lucas Oil team. In spite of
frequent broken bones and near death experiences, his aspirations to
be a leader in Off Road Racing, just as in Freestyle Motocross, keep
him focused on implementing incredible prospects within the sport.
Don’t even begin to assume that this is just a leisurely pursuit for him
or a mere infatuation with peril; this is life. Through merging Metal
Mulisha’s persona and his skills, this business savvy outlaw has shaped
a flourishing profitable empire and generated plenty of extra change.
Deegan will be competing in rally, speed and style events during the
2010 X-Games.
�� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
FUllCoNTACT
ACTION SPORTS ROUNDUPby Lacy Ottenson
Mike V Brings the Glory with New Skate Tour Pro-skater, musician, and all-around
badass Mike Vallely recently announced
plans to launch a 24-city skatepark
and entertainment tour, Glory
Bound Skatepark Tour, beginning July
18 in Mesa, AZ. Finalists from each
competition will be awarded with the
opportunity to skate with MIKE V later
in the day, grand prize winners will win
coveted sponsor prize packages, and
one national grand prize winner from
the tour will be flown into Los Angeles
along with a guest / guardian, for MIKE
V’s to-be-announced Skate Rock festival
which will take place in October, 2010.
Rookie MMA Fighter Flips the Shit Jarrod Wyatt, 26-
year-old a rookie
MMA fighter, has
just become the
ultimate poster
boy for the anti-drug campaign. Wyatt
has been charged with first-degree
murder in the grisly death of his spar-
ring partner and friend, Taylor Powell,
after the two of them drank psychedel-
ic mushroom tea. According to reports,
Wyatt became convinced that Powell,
21, was the devil and promptly took to
beating him to death. He then drilled an
18 inch hole into his chest, removed his
heart, tongue, and part of his face, and
then cooked some of the body parts up
in the oven because he wasn’t entirely
convinced the dude was dead yet. Let
that be a lesson to you kids.
Introducing the “Fly-nnstone Flip” by Flynn Novak Not a lot of people can claim being
able to pull off doing a back flip while
surfing. Even fewer have video proof of
them pulling it of. In fact, only one per-
son does. That person is Flynn Novak.
In a video running on ESPN’s action
sports section, aerial stunt master Flynn
Novak explains how it took him well
over 8 years to perfect the trick he
now dubs the Flynnstone Flip. The video
chronicles some of Novak’s attempts
at perfecting this move but shows two
clips toward the end of him actually
being able to do so. You have to see it
to believe it.<
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �9
RECREATINGTHE DRESSCODEChromeo Opts for Business CasualWords by: M.M. Zonoozy Photos by: Tim Saccenti
The electrofunk duo of Dave 1 and P-Thug
is often portrayed as a sort of paradox.
The combination of the suit wearing Jew and the
tall-T Arab channeling the 1980’s and singing funky
love songs is just, in some ways, funny.
In fact, the synth-funk masterminds better known
as Chromeo weren’t always taken seriously.
But now, on the verge of the release of their
third studio effort, Business Casual, it seems that
Chromeo is here to stay. This summer, they’ll be
touring North America in support of their new
album, and have lined up disco outfit Holy Ghost!
to keep them company. If you’re fortunate enough
to catch the show, you’ll find that blur of retro
and new-age, funk and electro, ying and yang that
makes Chromeo so original, so honest, and so
brilliant.
I got the opportunity to catch up with one half
of the Chromeozone, Dave 1, to chat about the
album and the evolution of the band:
MM: I heard you just put the finishing touches on
the new album?
Dave 1: Last night.
MM: Yeah? I’m excited to hear it! What can we
expect?
D1: I would say that, overall, this album has got
more of a nighttime kind of vibe. It’s a little bit
more sophisticated musically, and I think that
we really refined our brand of electrofunk. It’s
strange, I find that this album is both more
modern and more retro than the last one.
MM: How so?
D1: You know, Fancy Footwork was really a big 80’s
pop song and record. Obviously, we always
have our 80’s influences, but I feel like on this
new one, we draw from a sort of late 70’s
yacht rock
kind of thing
on some songs.
And other songs,
it’s straight up in
your face, really fierce
songs – almost the way
we had on our first album but
with a bigger sound. The
song writing is a little
bit more involved,
and I try to sing a
little bit more, and
there’s more ballads – a
ballad in French.
The next single is kind of ballad-
y, it’s a really smooth track. For me,
“Don’t Turn the Lights On,” is very Shade
influenced. Because “Night by Night” had
those rock guitars, so I wanted to balance it
out and come out with a statement of third
album artistic maturity.
MM: I feel like my age group nowadays learns a lot
about 80’s music from samples used by DJ’s,
and Daft Punk, and Chromeo. As you said,
Fancy Footwork was a lot of throwback stuff,
and we dig it. I think that’s the reason for the
success of some of these wonky pop acts, like
a La Roux, that are just 80’s bands stuck in the
2000’s.
D1: Yeah, and it’s got to have a modern side to it.
MM: Yeah, of course. And more of an electro tinge
to it. How much did groups like Daft Punk
inspire your musical direction?
D1: Hugely. To me, Discovery is one of my all time
favorite albums. On this record, there are a
lot of late 70’s influences too. And if you look
back, Daft Punk had already channeled that on
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Discovery with tracks like “Something About Us” and
“Digital Love,” so it was all there. I mean, Daft Punk
Discovery really laid the blueprint for everything that
we’re doing. We just try to make it our own and take
it to another direction. Everyone is doing so much
disco right now that I didn’t want to feed into that
too much, I just wanted something that focused more
on song writing.
MM: Sure. As I said, my age group found a lot of 80’s music
through you guys and newer groups. Was that the
same sort of thing for you growing up with you and
P [Thug]? Were you learning about funk through hip-
hop samples?
D1: Yup, exactly. Exactly. How old are you?
MM: 23
D1: Okay, I’m almost 10 years older than you. When I was
23, the greatest culture was the hip-hop
stuff. I was a hip-hop producer and I
would just collect records and dig
for records, and that’s exactly
how I learned.
MM: When I
read about you it
does seem like
you started
as this rap
pu r i s t .
How did that evolve into the snythy more electronic
style of Chromeo?
D1: I was a very, very sort of traditional hip-hop producer,
and in 1999-2000, the sound of hip-hop beats started
changing. You had DMX beats – I didn’t know how
to make those. In 1999-2000, the biggest hip-hop
records were Ja Rule and Nelly. Now, looking back,
I see what’s dope about those records, even though
they were very commercial. But back then, I just
thought those records were corny.
MM: Understandable.
D1: Yeah, it wasn’t up my alley any more and I was just
getting less and less stimulated with what hip-hop
was beginning to sound like. And at the same time
we just spontaneously got this record deal offered
to us to do something that wasn’t hip-hop. In about
a two-year span, that became my main thing. Since I
was a kid, I was writing songs in my head anyways. So,
this just gave me an opportunity to make something
tangible out of it and pay homage to the music I grew
up listening to.
MM: For sure. Your brother is A-Trak, who is also Kanye’s
DJ, and he’s really making a name for himself as one
of the greatest remixers, scratchers, producers -
whatever out right now. Now that he’s built quite a
following for himself and the Fool’s Gold camp, do
you see a lot of overlap between Chromeo fans and
A-Trak fans?
D1: More than ever. But I think that now there’s a lot
of A-Trak fans that don’t even know us. But finally,
my brother and I are going to start doing shows
together. We can start doing Chromeo and A-Trak
shows and have people get a kick out of that. I
hope so anyways.
MM: I think people would love it. I’ve
seen both you guys, and I just saw A-Trak
recently and I think the crowd is just
getting bigger and bigger for him. I know
you guys work together for production, but
do you guys ever just call each other up to get
opinions on a track and be like, ‘How does
this sound?’
D1: All the time. I speak to my brother
ten times a day.
MM: Does he ever just tell you
something sucks?
D1: Yeah! Yeah. I mean, I don’t
remember the last time…But he’ll be
critical and be like, ‘Eh, this doesn’t
really work.’ And I’ll do the same
thing for him.
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
MM: What’s the song-writing process like for
Chromeo? Are you writing the lyrics?
D1: It really changes from song to song. The only
thing that stays the same is that I’m the one
doing the singing and P is more in charge of
all the synths and everything in the studio.
MM: Where’d you guys get the infatuation with
love lyrics? You’re a hip-hop guy, I want to
hear Dave 1 do Lil Wayne. I want to hear Lil
Dave 1!
D1: Nah, man! Nah. I’m a skinny white kid with
a suit on. Unless you are living that lifestyle,
you shouldn’t be rapping. To me, I write
something that’s true to me.
MM: You guys are funny and have that light-hearted
feel to your music and your performances,
and definitely the videos.
D1: Yes! Yes. There’s humor in everything. There’s
humor in Lil Wayne, there’s humor in Hall
& Oats, there’s humor in Michael Jackson.
Michael Jackson has a song about turning
into a werewolf. You don’t think that’s funny?
That’s fucking hysterical. There’s no way he
was serious. I mean, nobody can just be like,
‘Alright, I’m going to turn into a werewolf on
this song.’ It’s funny! It’s ridiculous.
MM: Do you think when you guys first started out,
people were hesitant to take you seriously?
D1: Yeah! I don’t think, I know! That was a fact.
It was tough for a bit, but whatever, we just
stuck it out, and I guess people came around
a little bit more. I couldn’t care less right now
if people think we’re joking. As long as they
like the music, I really don’t care.
MM:You just mentioned Hall & Oates, and I’m
a frequent visitor of LiveFromDarylsHouse.
com. And although those videos are pretty
poorly edited, I love the idea. I remember
seeing you guys on there and digging it.
Now, I heard you guys just performed at
Bonnaroo with Daryl Oates live. How did
that go over?
D1: It was amazing; one of the greatest nights of
my life.
MM: How was it singing next to him? Did you get
nervous?
D1: Yeah! But, I guess, you know, you just got to
stick it out and do the best you can.
You can check out Chromeo’s first single, “Night
by Night,” off their new album, Business Casual,
at Mountain Dew Green Label Sound. The album
itself will drop August 17th, and you can see
Chromeo on their 23-stop North America tour
throughout the summer.<
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The story normally plays out as such: lead
singer of a well-known band announces
work on a solo record, media devours said news,
dispels it to the masses and once it reaches fans
the speculation and break-up hysteria ensues. It
is one of those clichés you hoped would vanish
with time, and you think about Jonsi, Eddie Vedder
and Thom Yorke and how their pursuit of a solo
career apparently marked the death of the bands
they fronted. The solo material is released and
the band remains intact; speculative bloggers
and fans look like a bunch of dolts. Rinse and
repeat, which thankfully has not been a process
Kele Okereke has dealt with; at least not in the
same fevor-inspired manner as the Pearl Jam,
Radiohead or Sigur Ros brigade.
But that does not discount, or diminish, Kele’s
effect in the music industry. The works he crafted
with the breakout Indie Rock group, Bloc Party,
have offered a global and highly-dedicated fanbase
– propelling Kele as one of the most recognized
vocalists in recent memory. Like any like minded
artist, though, there is the curiosity to explore
one’s creative boundaries. Kele did just that,
finding time to tinker around in a rehearsal space
after five years of extensive touring. Whereas
most people find some form of solace or
respite away from the touring scene, Kele’s soul
searching was tethered to his solo expeditions
with instruments he never used before – like
drum machines – or tackling genres that fell
outside the Bloc Party sphere.
While Bloc Party’s last album, Intimacy, flirted with
electronics set alongside the frantic and urgent
nature of Bloc Party’s trademark sound, Kele’s
fondness of electronica courses deep through
the veins of his first solo album, The Boxer.
“The whole idea is we fight all our lives. Whether
it’s with ourselves, or others, but we’re always
getting into some type of fight that defines who
we are,” Kele explains. “For me this album was
like that – fighting to find something different, as
well as the whole idea that every fight isn’t going
to be a victory. You’re bound to lose sometime,
but its how you manage to pick yourself up that
defines who you are as person.”
Bloc Party balanced the careful act of firing on
all emotional cylinders, while providing a core
sound that channeled a raw, invigorating energy.
Kele’s solo work takes this a step further,
incorporating live acoustic elements paired
with Gary Numan-esque electronica rhythms
that will definitely appeal to fans of all ages and
genres. Slow builders such as New Rules present
a calm, tranquil atmosphere with terse pizzicato
figures with warm electronic voices that manifest
from absolute silence, while Other Side merges
tribal percussion elements, fuzzy-synth patches
and Kele’s translucent vocals into an intriguing
musical package.
“I’m hoping what people get from this album is
the sense of warmth. The same feeling that I got
when I was making these songs and this album,”
Kele describes. “I didn’t just want to make a
record that was entirely electronic. I wanted
to make something people could see and feel as
well. So my hope is they get a little sense of that
when they’re listening.”
Both elements of light and dark are present in
the record, especially in the penultimate track of
the album, All the Things I Could Never Say. Amidst
oscillating electronic rhythms, a distant organ
timbre and other 8-bit sensibilities, Kele tackles
with lost love through self-reflective lyrics that
resonate to a startling degree. And then you think
back to Everything You Wanted, with Kele singing
through the brooding, pulsating bass rhythms and
sparse piano figures. Without notice the song
unexpectedly bursts into an unexpected flurry of
Latin percussion fused with electronica, and Kele
claiming that he “could have given everything you
wanted/everything you needed” – never realizing
he’s doing just that. Giving people a record that
represents the fight we struggle with everyday:
the fight to find ourselves. <
sOlO MIssIONBloc Party’s Kele Okereke Does His Own Thing
words by: Alex Mendoza photo by: Sarah Piantadosi
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �5
FOR THE RECORDby Melissa Fouler &n Richard Cold
M.I.A.’s Got BeefAfter publishing an in-depth look
at M.I.A. and the development
of her new album, / \ / \ / \
Y / \, New York Times staff
writer Lynn Hirschberg found
herself at the mercy of M.I.A.’s
less than jubilant take on
her story. With quotes from
collaborators like Diplo and
“Born Free” director Romain
Gavras that were less than
complimentary, the story wasn’t
all roses. M.I.A. responded by
tweeting Hirschberg’s personal
cell phone number. Hirschberg
called M.I.A.’s actions, “infuriating
and not surprising.”
A Punk Band, Really? Billy Joel Armstrong and Green
Day have officially gone from
bay area punks to punk rock’s
most respectable commercial
opportunists. Green Day is joins
the Beatles as the only other band
to receive their very own version
of the hugely successful Rock Band
video game. Released this last
month, the game has been flying off
store shelves.
Watch out for those rowdy Hanson fans. A near riot ensued when the
has-been boy band held a free
concert for whatever reason they
would have to hold a concert.
The hard-core fans showed up in
mindless droves, more than 10,000
more than organizers expected.
The concert was canceled after
the crowd got out of control, not
kidding. In all fairness, the
crowd was more than
likely there to see
Drake.
EarninG a FrESh Pair OF KiCKSDan Black’s Experimentation Deserves Real Praisewords by: Kristie Bertucci
The name Dan Black might not be too familiar
to you now, but by the end of this year, you’ll be
hearing lots about the latest Brit import to hit American
music industry shores. Impacting the American music scene
in spring 2008 with his insanely crazy/cool “HYPNTZ,” a
cut sampling Rihanna’s drums from that ditty “Umbrella”
and a tribute of sorts to Notorious B.I.G.’s “Hypnotize,”
which has now become the single “Symphonies” from his
debut album ((Un)). (It was actually released in 2009 in the
UK, but recently came out in the U.S this year.)
“I did it amongst a bunch of experiments where I took
disparate songs I wanted to take inspiration from and
sewed them together and sang other songs on top, mainly
to see if I could make them work,” Black explains. “I just
planned them for my own private education really, but
some had something cool about them so I put them on
my MySpace.”
Like all artists, the road to success never really happens
overnight, and Black’s own musical journey was no
different. “I have many skeletons hidden in my closet,” he
says when asked about the road to his newfound success.
“Before being solo I did many, many different projects. I
was basically a bit of a musical whore.” For Black, being
a “musical whore” actually turned out to be beneficial,
which is what led him to start experimenting with various
genres of music, something that cumulated into his recent
release.
“Sitting on my own in a stone cellar in Paris” is how he
describes what went into making his debut album. “For
months at a time,” he continues. “I decided to make it
totally on my own. This led to me having the moment of
madness and terror. But overall it was deeply fun.” And
fun is a great way to describe the type of musical on the
album even though he wants to leave the labeling to us.
“My explanation for my music is long and inelegant. I’m too
close to it to come up with some short, pithy term for it.
Isn’t that your job?”
With an apathy toward labels, Black have empathy for
what he’s learned over the years, as he perfected his
craft as an artist. Besides learning and a becoming aware
of his limitations, he’s also learned how to turn any of
his weaknesses into strengths. “Its like anything really;
repeated, concentrated exercise of something slowly
builds technique and understanding. But a lot of what is
learned is hard to articulate.”
So far, 2010 has been very busy for Black as he tours the
country, gaining more and more fans. He’ll be at this year’s
Lollapalooza and has recently announced that he’ll join
Swedish pop sensation Robyn and R&B star Kelis on the
“All Hearts Tour,” that’s actually touted by Spin as “one of
the 25 Must-See Summer Tours this year.”
“Touring as been dope,” he describes. “One of the great
things about my job is the massive variety of experiences
it brings me. And touring is one of the most intense,
in pretty much equally good and bad ways. I’m loving
exploring the States.” Besides exploring America, he’s
also working on numerous other projects. “Having made
my album totally alone, I’m now embracing collaboration
with a force. In fact as I speak I am in LA doing a bunch
of sessions with and for other artists. It’s cool to shake
up my ways of working, particularly so dramatically.”
Looking to release his follow-up album within the next
year or so, Black is fairly a simple artist, claiming his
desired achievements in music include, “pleasure, freedom,
purpose, nice shoes…”
www.danblacksound.com<
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It was a bold move on the part of Authority Zero to begin their latest effort, “Stories of Survival,” with a Winston
Churchill speech. Their eclectic blend of ska, punk and guitar-driven rock fits like a well worn glove and that’s all you need
to know to get to understand the band. “We’ve got a little something different that we bring to the table,” says frontman
Jason DeVore. Listen to the fantastically catchy new tunes, “Big Bad World,” or “Crashland,” and you’ll see he’s right. “We
play the music (outside) of the standard format really.” This isn’t the first rodeo for Authority Zero, having released four
albums since 2002. The latest effort, “Stories of Survival” is the band at it’s finest. Welcoming original bassist Jeremy Wood
back into the mix and bringing on new guitarist Zach Vogel, the group feels more cohesive now and the music serves a
purpose in its inspirational messages. “It just kind of came down to what’s going on in the world within ourselves as a
group in our personal lives,” said DeVore. “Just the idea behind it, saying ‘We’ve got good times ahead and we’re gonna do
what we can to push ahead and keep on fighting through the struggle to make things come out better in the end.’”
AUTHORITY ZERO words by Ramon Gonzales__________________________________________________________________________________________
Aside from gaining attention due to being refugees of their Orwellian state, they have established their presence as a solid
indie-rock ensemble. The members of this band, from Tehran, Iran, are on the front lines of the Iranian “rock” movement
and continue to arm themselves with well-written songs influenced by the penchant of Queens of the Stone Age and The
Psychedelic Furs. Through the Chaos, their debut album, is comprised of reckoning lyrics and incisive guitar riffs that bear a
resemblance to Interpol. The songs on this record give way to living in the present moment and they also encourage other
musicians who are caught up in fix to break away from the regimes that control their passions and dreams. Their narrative
is not only rousing to other artistes in Iran or additional countries and cultures that forbid such exhibitions, but also for
everyone that believes in turning every wall into a door of opportunity. Hypernova’s members are alive, grateful and living
their dream without having to rock underground or under the dim light of a theocratic government. By taking on a new
sense of what it is to be an artist, they persist on doing what they love and by no means ever take anything for granted.
HYPERNOvA words by Elysia McMahan__________________________________________________________________________________________
FOR THE RECORD CONTINUED...
Eminem Resorting to InfomercialsRemember that Vince dude from
the Slap Chop commercials? The
one that says you’ll love his nuts?
Well apparently Eminem has
recruited the famous pitchman
for an infomercial promoting
the upcoming Recovery LP. The
commercial says the CD will have
“dozens of uses” including grading
cheese. It slices; it dices and will
be on clearance
shelves in no
time.
Ozzy –Are You Fucking Serious?!In seriously funny news, scientists
are planning to examine Ozzy
Ozbourne’s DNA to see how the
hell he’s still alive. After years of
hardcore partying, drinking and
god knows what else,
Scientists are looking
at how Ozzy’s body
has reacted
to the
alcohol
and drugs.
Ozzy
Ozbourne
a medical
miracle? I’ll
pay to see that.
The 2010 SRH Festival Is AnnouncedWith performances from the
likes of Unwritten Law, Authority
Zero, along with radio sensations
The Dirty Heads, and veterans
Kottonmouth Kingz, Supporting
Radical Habits has announced an
epic festival slated for August 7th in
San Bernadino, CA. Celebrating the
merger of music and lifestyle that
is SRH, you might want to score a
ticket soon, or you just have to read
about what you missed.<
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FLICkS
kEEPIN’ IT REELwords by Katie Evans
Bollywood Meets HitlerIndian actor Anupam Kher was forced
to pull out of his lead role as Hitler in
the upcoming film “Dear Friend Hitler.”
Since when were their Bollywood
versions of films about German Nazi
leaders? India’s small Jewish
community of about 5,000
was pissed, needless to say,
and protested the actor’s
role as Hitler. Though the
film director claims
there is no Hitler
glorification, he
is now short a
starring actor
Megan Fox Knows How To Express LovePossible sexiest woman in entertainment
today, Megan Fox, is off the dating market
for a second time to her boyfriend
Austin Green. That is, if the ring isn’t
anything to officially go by. After Green
proposed to her at their Hawaii hotel,
Fox jumped up and down, ecstatic,
and later on, a handful of staff were
seen sifting around in the sand for the
engagement ring.
Charlie Sheen, Once A Mess, Always A MessFor the second time this year, Charlie
Sheen’s car has been found at the
bottom of a cliff. The first time it was in
a ravine, and the latest time was near
a cliff on Mulholland Drive. Supposedly,
the car was taken from his driveway and
police suspect a “serial car cliffer” who
has been doing the same thing to other
cars in the neighborhood. Rough, for the
same dude who “can’t” go to jail because
he “can’t” stop smoking.
Bam Margera’s Ass Kicked By Some Jackass Old LadyJackass star Bam Margera had his ass
handed to him by a 59-year-old woman
wielding a bat. She was arrested, and he
went to the hospital to have his head
stapled back together. His concussion
and internal bleeding
caused some parts of
the new Jackass 3-D
movie to be rewritten,
even though it seems
like he’s had it worse
just being on the
show.<
words by Jasen T. Davis
FresH ProDuCe
INCEPTIONRelease Date: July 16th Studio: warner Bros. Pictures
THE LAST AIRBENDERRelease Date: July 10thStudio: Paramount Pictures
Well, you can only direct so many
stinkers before you are forced to direct
a mindless, big-budget action flick for
little kids, this time without a surprise
ending, thank you very much. Shyamalan’s latest offering
boasts martial artists who use magic and a lot of CGI to
command the elements of nature to fight each other. Give it
a break, it’s based on a children’s action animation series of
the same name, and it’s produced by Nickelodeon.
TwELvE Release Date: July 30thStudio: Hannover House
In the vein of Less Than Zero and
anything written by Bret Easton Ellis,
this grim movie tells the story of rich,
spiritually destitute Upper Eastside
teenagers living in Manhattan who party, drink, sell and do
drugs. The cast looks solid without being predictable. If you
aren’t interested, than just take a good dose of Trainspotting,
as a sorbet to clear the palate.
A sci-fi thriller about men who commit corporate espionage using advanced technology that allows them to steal valuable
secrets from a person’s subconscious through their dreams. Leonardo DiCaprio is Dom Cobb, a man who is the best in his
field, but his crimes have made him a fugitive from the law. He is offered a job to clear his name, but with a twist: instead of
stealing data from a person’s mind, he must plant information instead. Christopher Nolan develops science fiction that is well
crafted. If you want mindless action you may want to look elsewhere.
DINNER FOR SCHMUCkSRelease Date: July 23rdStudio: Paramount/Dreamworks
The Dinner Game was a French black
comedy about a group of successful
businessmen who hold a weekly dinner.
The point? Each guest must bring an
idiot, in this case it’s Paul Rudd bringing Steve Carell to the
party. The person who brought the biggest idiot wins, but
Steve Carell is an IRS employee who could potentially make
life a financial hell for the person that irks him.
GET LOw Release Date: July 2010Studio: Sony Picture Classics
Felix Bush (Duvall) is a hermit living
deep in the woods near a small town.
One day he shows up with cash
and demands a living funeral, where
everyone in the town can come to meet him face to face
in a morbid roast of sorts. This movie features a compelling
plot and a solid mystery at it’s core, but will likely fly over
the average audience’s head.
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FRESHpRoDUCE
DvDs
words by Alexis Amparan
TO SErvE aND
PrOTECT
The DepartedA modern classic, this Scorsese film
makes you think every cop just might
be at least a little crooked.
ColorsPenn and Duvall play the best good
cop, bad cop combination to hit the
silver screen.
Training DayThere is a reason Denzel Washing-
ton won an Oscar for playing a dirty
cop. One of the best performances,
period.
In The Heat Of The NightThis classic tail of racism and redemp-
tion has endured the test of time to
remain one of cinema’s best.
Lethal weaponBefore the whole anti-Semitism thing,
Mel Gibson was loved. The Lethal
Weapon films were a big reason why.
BROOkLYN’S FINESTAvailable On: July 6th Studio: Overture Films
So Antoine Fuqua, director of Training Day, likes cop drama – a LOT. He gives us another view of the blue in this film, or is
it? Brooklyn’s Finest comes off as a hurricane of the hypothetical as we see three cops (good, bad and handsome) trying to
make the script work. The Acting is good but it is still 133 minutes of ‘seen it.’
FAGBUGRelease Date: July 13thStudio: Garden Thieves Pictures
When Erin Davies, of Sage College,
found her VW bug vandalized with
hateful, homophobic phrases she
decided to take the rubber to the road.
Her 58 days long, cross-country trek led to further damages
to her beloved vehicle. It also led to a VW sponsorship,
awareness for the struggles of American gays and a lot
of support from straight Americans who are starting
to broaden their ideas about equality. Beep, beep Miss
Davies!
GREENSBERGRelease Date: July 13thStudio: Focus Features
Mumblecore has a new poster child…
Greenberg! There’s no mistaking that
the new genre of self-loathing, antihero,
character sketch, non-dramas are
taking over and we have a new artifact for the museum with
this film. Although you may not find it uplifting, you will
enjoy a few uncomfortable laughs, ala Napolean Dynamite,
as we watch a 40-year-old Ben Stiller do practically nothing
but mope. It’s only a lukewarm Dixie cup of water in the
face, but I like it.
A SINGLE MANRelease Date: July 6thStudio: Sony Pictures
Gucci designer Tom Ford has been
criticized for his lack of directorship
in A Single Man, perhaps, unfairly. His
amazing cast, headed up by Colin Firth
and Julianne Moore, deliver well-tailored portraits and the
script, while understated, is rich and well executed. While
Mr. Ford can no more tell his clientele how to act in his
clothes, his aesthetic definitely evokes emotion – in textiles
as well as film.
21 BELOwRelease Date: July 2010Studio: IndiePix Films
The only problem with documentaries
is their inescapable reality. Do you
really want to know what you’re eating,
how we’re destroying the world, that
there really are people starving to death in our streets?
All these topics are important to learn about and certainly
interesting for activists. But, please don’t make me watch a
documentary about a messed up, middle class family. There
is still no educational value in that.
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locals only Destined For The Main Stage
FRESH PRODUCEFRESHpRoDUCE
AUDIO
COzEttE
Formed as a collection of verteran
musicians who have played with
bands including April Sixth, Elseworth,
Homegrown, and Save Ferris, Cozette
might be unsigned hype, but not for
long. Dropping Dowry’s And Stolen Letters
With Producer Eric Talaba (Fall Out Boy,
Anberlin, Yellowcard, The Spill Canvas),
expect big things.
LEt ‘EM RIOt
The immediate conclusion would be to
lump LER in with the likes of The Postal
Service or the blatant ripoff that is Owl
City, but listen closely and find that the
one man project from Alan Oakes is a
collection of poignant songwriting and
careful attention to melody that is rarely
done with a full band, let alone one guy.
thE bOhunkS
Don’t get it twisted, soul, funk, reggae, The
Bohunks take a little from each column to
put together music that remains universal
in its appeal. And no, this is not the radio
version of reggae, no Sublime tribute
here. Classic Kingston inspired sound and
60’s heartfelt groove make the Bohunks
destined for the minastage.
words by Felix Ulery
Drops: July 6th Drops: July 13th
ICE CUBEI Am The west Label: Lench MobAvailable On: July 13th
HOw TO DESTROY ANGELSSelf-TitledThe Null Corporation
Having already been
made available for FREE
download in June, Trent
Reznor, wife Mariqueen
Maandig, and Atticus Ross
have crafted a 6-song
EP that has already set
off a firestorm of critical
praise. Making music vivid,
HTDA is a meticulous
ode to the noir missing
from music. This is
essential.
BIG BOISir Lucious Left FootDef Jam/Purple Ribbon
“General Patton” features
Big Boi rapping over
a George Solti Opera
piece, this is the kind of
creativity long missing
from hip hop. Although a
legal dispute has forced
the absence of Andre
3000 from this album,
spots from George
Clinton, T.I., B.o.B., and
Janelle Monae make this a
must have.
M.I.A./\/\/\Y/\N.E.E.T./XL Recordings
Describing her latest
effort as “schizophrenic,”
M.I.A. has already ruffled
feathers with the single
“Born Free” and the fairly
graphic music video that
dropped for it. Insightful
lyrical presence, spastic
musical arrangements,
and pop art redefined is
about the best way to
capture what Maya is all
about.
DANGERMOUSE & SPARkLEHORSEDark Night Of The SoulSelf-Released
Let’s run down the list
of featured artists on
this…Iggy Pop, Frank Black,
Julian Casablancas, Suzanne
Vega, and The Flaming Lips
to name a few. Coupled
with a book of photos
from David Lynch, this
ambitious collaboration is
likely to become a staple
for collectors – and the
music ain’t bad either.
Making an emphatic statement in the title, Ice Cube has never been one to keep quiet. Working with producers like
Dr. Dre, DJ Quik, and E-A-Ski, there is no denying that Cube’s trademark lyrical prowess shines apparent in EVERY track.
Determined to restore west coast hip-hop to its once mighty reign, Cube has made a record that will command attention.
Drops: July 12thDrops: July 6th
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 45
GAMES
words by Alex Mendoza
FRESH PRODUCEFRESHpRoDUCE
BITS & BYTES
CRACkDOwN 2GEnRE: SCI-FI SHOOTER SySTEmS: xBOx 360 DROPS: JULy 6TH
Crackdown was a no-frills action game with a “do-as-you-please” system established for an entertaining experience. The sequel
to this action hit takes this concept to new heights, as zombies and those who oppose The Agency are your new enemies. As
if vanquishing the gangs wasn’t enough, but with even more weapons/powers at your disposal there’s nothing gamers cannot
decimate. The empowering mechanics make this worth visiting and the true sense of being a titan among men.
SHIN MEGAMI TENSEI 3: PORTABLEGEnRE: RPG SySTEmS: PSPDROPS: JULy 6TH
The original Persona 3 was released back in 2007 on the
PS2, and the game was hailed by many critics and fans
as the definitive RPG of that year. This revamp of the
beloved RPG adds several tweaks to dated mechanics
and provides an accessible and engaging experience.
Granted Final Fantasy XIII quenched the thirst of RPG
fans, but thankfully this title promotes exploration, a
memorable story and reminds gamers there are other
franchises that can give Final Fantasy a run for its money.
STARCRAFT II: wINGS OF LIBERTYGEnRE: REAL-TImE STRATEGy SySTEmS: PC & mACDROPS: JULy 27TH
Fans have been quite adamant about another in-depth
story following the exploits of the Terrans, Protoss and
Zerg. Blizzard heeded their requests, the story so vast
that it had to be split into three chapters to equally focus
on all three races. Characters like Raynor and Kerrigan
return, along with the same innovative gameplay and jaw-
dropping graphics that made the first title a classic. The
sequel continues this tradition of excellence and justifies
good things come to those who wait.
ThE GAMES YOU LOVE TO hATE nAUGHTy BEAR - xBOx 360
You would imagine the idea of playing as a teddy bear that terrorizes other stuffed
animals would be hilarious and entertaining. Especially if it’s going to be done at
some sadistically charming level, or say the developers say. But then it’s in your
hands and you’re playing it only to realize what a God-awful decision you made. You
can’t go back, though, because you play hoping the clunky mechanics will improve.
They don’t. Ever. Another “good idea gone bad”.
Project NatalThe Wii proved the idea of asking
gamers to physically partake in
games. Microsoft hopes to do
the same with its motion-sensor
camera, dubbed Project Natal,
when it is unveiled at the next
E3. A recent study conducted by
a consumer research firm OTX
screened 1,500 gamers (14 – 34)
that play video games more than 1
hour, and of that 56% indicate they
will more than likely purchase the
component if it has “low prices,
demos to observe at retail stores
and the ability to play first-rate
titles with the component”.
Killzone 3: Bigger & BetterGuerilla Studios is
going all out for their
next stint in the
Killzone franchise
with Killzone 3.
One of the newest
features
will
be the ability to wear a jetpack,
which leads to the type of double-
jumping elements you would find
in a platformer. Also the game will
be designed to be played in 3D for
those who end up forking the cash
to buy the snazzy 3D television and
the 3D glasses to boot.
Hedgehog’s DilemmaGamers have been going into
somewhat of a nostalgic frenzy
since Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode I
was announced in development for
X Box 360’s “X Box 360 Arcade”
service, along with the Wii Ware
and PlayStation Network. This
comes sixteen years following Sonic
The Hedgehog 3, but sadly it would
appear gamers will have to wait
until later 2010. SEGA released
an announcement that implied this
extension will give developers more
time to fine tune the game, in turn
giving gamers “an unrivaled classic
Sonic experience.” <
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With filming, djing, and recording, when do you find time to sleep?Last night I went to bed around 1 a.m. and slept
until 11 a.m.! When I do get a chance to sleep I
take advantage of it. Especially lately, with DJ’ing,
it’s such a nightlife thing. Everybody in the town
is going out every night so they don’t miss out
on anything but the best thing is to get rest and
relaxation…that’s what the good life’s all about.
Should we be surprised to see you behind the tables or is that old news? My brother can remember the day I went to Guitar
Center and bought turntables and a mixer and I had
a tiny crate of records and I brought them home
[to our apartment]. That was right around the
age where I moved to LA to pursue my dreams of
dancing and acting and that took off for me. When
our industry got so messed up I went out and
bought turntables again because if I’m not creative
I’m not alive.
Some of your best friends are Djs, was their support enough or were you nervous?I’m especially nervous in front of my peers. Ever
since I started DJ’ing I’ve been thrown into crazy
situations, like Vegas, but my whole attitude is kind
of sink or swim. I’ve been thrown into movies
where there’s a little nudity or a sex scene and I’ve
had to show up to set the first day and these idiots
make me do my sex scene, very first thing, first day
on set. I’ve been thrown into so many be brave,
courageous situations that it’s just a part of me
now, but deep down inside I’m dying.
Your film, LOVE RANCH, is out this month and is the true story of Nevada’s legal brothels. WHAT THE HELL IS HELEN MIRREN DOING IN THIS FILM?I feel like this is exactly what she needed because
when you’re an actor and you’re versatile and
you’re amazing, like Helen Mirren and Meryl Streep
and some of my other favorites, you can’t always
play the beautiful, elegant queen or wife. You know,
Helen’s smart, she played the queen and won
awards and now she’s playing a madam. I think it’s
genius. I love that she’s risky, I don’t like people that
are scared and that keep it safe.
You are leaving soon for Oahu to film HAWAII FIVE-O, which
one blogger speculated that you weren’t going to be a part of…There’s some idiot out there that’s writing that and
it isn’t true because I’m leaving for Hawaii, tickets in
hand, and I’m in the second episode [not the pilot]
and unless the show takes a shit I’ve got my ticket
and I’m going. There’s always going to be that kind
of crap. But at least they’re talking and speculating.
I hope Hawaii Five-0 is successful. I don’t watch
a lot of television, but I hope this goes a long way
with some style, some class, some edge, and some
dignity.
What do you hope for you future in film?Look I’m a rock and roller, there’s no denying it
but when it comes to that red carpet and being
considered an actress, I’m a good actress and
when those opportunities come around I take
advantage of them and I’m glad to go and be
among my peers. I’m a dramatic actor, but I don’t
want to keep being put into these roles where I’m
tortured all the time because I’m actually really
funny and a lighthearted person. And I’m hoping
that in the future there’s some sort of comedy and
some other material because I really feel like I’ve
done the dramatic thing. <
TrIPLE ThrEaT Taryn Manning Shines On Every Stage words by Alexis Amparan
Phot
ogra
pher
: Mic
hael
Vin
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St
ylis
t: Le
ilani
Lac
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Mak
eup:
Alla
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Opu
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Vale
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: M
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Am
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Den
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Cur
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- H
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: Vel
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Jew
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: Mic
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- Sw
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SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 49
skinnie GirL
50 • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
SkINNIEgIRl
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 5�
nitty Gritty
WEWaNT
ThE
aIrWavEs
Stryker o
f the W
orld Famous K
ROQ
Doesn’t Take This L
ightly
words by: R
amon Gonzale
s photos b
y: Mich
ael Vincen
t
5� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
Let’s take a trip back in time for a minute to 1999. Just to
put things into sort of a pop culture timeline for reference,
this was the same year that Napster was first introduced to the
world. In the same year, a then governor of Texas, George W. Bush
announced he would seek the Republican Party nomination for
President of the United States. Oh yeah, and a then second to
the almighty PC company called Apple released their first ever
iBook laptop computer. 1999 would also be the same year Stryker
would take to the airwaves for the LA rock radio institution that is
KROQ. More impressive than the duration of 11 years in of itself,
is the feat of staying relevant in a medium that has undoubtedly
experienced significant change in the last decade, (think iPods and
satellite feeds). Stryker has helped break bands that have gone on
to become some of music’s biggest marquee names – System of A
Down, 311, MUSE – just to name a few. His tenure at KROQ thus
far has included a longtime stint as host on the station’s hugely
popular “Loveline” syndicated call-in program alongside Dr. Drew
Pinksi, an eventual segue into film in television, (yup – he was the
dude who played records for Ellen DeGeneres to dance to every
afternoon), a brief departure to another station, and on March
1, 2010, he would return home to KROQ to helm the coveted
afternoon drive-time slot every Monday through Friday. For the
LA native who admittedly stumbled into his passion, 11 years has
passed by in a blink. He’d likely tell you – time flies when you are
having fun.
“I worked at the Four Seasons Hotel in Beverly Hills for six months,
it felt like five years. I worked at 31 Flavors for nine months; It felt
like two years. Now I’m at KROQ for the past 11 years and I cant
even believe that much time has gone by. For me, maybe not to
other people, it feels like I have been on the Lakers for the past
10 years. I grew up with the station…once I got into radio, it was
the place I always wanted to be.” Ironically, Stryker’s radio career
happened to begin with casual coincidence. Growing up enamored
by “NWA on the far right and The Cure and Depeche Mode on
the far left,” it wasn’t until Stryker left LA to attend college in
Tucson that his calling actually began to take shape.
He began working in radio at a station in Tucson after a “hey come
check out the studio” type of suggestion from a friend. It was
there he managed to capture the attention of KROQ decision
makers. “I was actually on KROQ before I was even hired. I was
flown out from Tucson to meet with KROQ and they were like,
‘hey, what are you doing tonight? Why don’t you come back and
go on at 8. Tonight.’ It wasn’t some odd hour of the night, they put
me on at 8 at night. It was huge for me.”
This kind of immediate confidence KROQ invested in Stryker,
combined with a sincere love of the job resulted in a steady
ascension at the station. He would quickly become one of the
more notable personalities on the air. Just how popular did
Stryker get? Just two years into his career at KROQ, television
networks already began knocking on his door. “My second year
in, the American Idol people came calling. I had an interview and
audition all in one day.” Stryker was hired, contacts and all, to
be the fourth judge of the then unknown show. But as a young
professional really looking to cement his reputation and legitimacy
in a competitive field, he began to have second thoughts. “I was
finding my footing at KROQ, trying to figure out who I was on the
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 5�
NITTygRITTy
radio, and really selling myself to the KROQ audience….Two
days before taping, after talking to people I was like, I can’t do
this. I can’t be the guy who interviews System of A Down and
world premieres new Rage Against The Machine and I’m judging
a karaoke contest.” Despite the huge success of the show,
Stryker genuinely felt no regret about walking away. “KROQ
really was were I always wanted to be. I felt that now that I was
there, I needed to do everything I could to be the best at that. I
don’t have any regrets about the decisions I made.”
Continuing to cement his credibility on the airwaves, Stryker
could only stave off Hollywood for so long before his inevitable
transition would happen. All while continuing to be one of
radio’s most important personalities, Stryker would land roles
in feature films including Out Cold and Grandma’s Boy. He
would land roles on television shows including VH1’s Charm
School and a sidekick spot on the Ellen DeGeneres Show. Yet
despite the kind of success he has enjoyed outside of the realm
of radio, Stryker adamantly maintains that above all else, radio
is the reason. “Loaning your voice to a video game is probably
one of the coolest things I’ve done,” Stryker grins. “Anything I
have ever got to do outside of radio really happened because
of radio…when I worked at the Four Seasons, I never missed a
day. I never showed up late. I was never rude to anyone. Being
on KROQ for 10 years, it’s been the same approach, just on
a bigger scale.” A conversation with Stryker about his career
seemed to naturally conjure something famous Los Angeles
Dodger Coach/Legend Tommy Lasorda once said, “If you love
your job, you haven’t worked a day in your life.”
“Maybe this is speaking too highly but, every single day that I
go to work, I always think, ‘you never know.’ What if someone
is tuning into KROQ for the very first time? What if Jack
Johnson is in town and wants to know what’s going on at
KROQ. It’s my job to make sure they do not have a reason to
change the station.” From having deli sandwiches with Jerry
Heller (NWA. Google it.) to famously climbing onstage with
the guys in Pennywise to sing “Bro Hymn,” a vital component
to Stryker’s longevity has been his ability to convey a sincere
admiration for what he does everyday. To once again put things
into perspective, most marriages don’t last a decade and if you
weren’t doing it right, you couldn’t keep a job picking up trash
for 11 years, let alone command a daily audience of hundreds
of thousands. Despite that fact, Stryker sidesteps the notion
of celebrity status and the clichéd ego and credits his success
to something that is much more universal. “I have always tired
to be a decent guy, stick to my guns, and I have always tired to
show people the kind of passion I have for this job.” Flustered,
Stryker almost forgets his train of thought and simply concedes,
“I’m happy…God, that was a terrible answer. (Laughs)”
Just one listen any weekday afternoon and you would be hard
pressed to find a reason to disagree with Stryker’s conviction
or Mr. Lasorda assertion for that matter. When you are happy
and love what you do, you just can’t call it work. <www.twitter.com/tedstryker
www.kroq.com
54 • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 55
“
”
I have always tired to be a
decent guy, stick to my guns, and
I have always tired to show
people the kind of passion I have
for this job...
...I’m happy.- stryker
5� • SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 5�
INDEX________________________________________________________________
LOS ANGELES LAS vEGAS ORANGE COUNTY SAN DIEGO INLAND EMPIREWeekly Club Listings
Calendar
Club Pictures
KROQ’S Weenie Roast
Ink-N-Iron Festival
Weekly Club Listings
Calendar
Club Pictures
Weekly Club Listings
Calendar
Club Pictures
Weekly Club Listings
Calendar
Club Pictures
Weekly Club Listings
Calendar
Club Pictures
p.058
p.059
p.060
p.062 p.064 p.066 p.068
skinnie sCene
ozzy osBourne @ aMoeBa reCorDs
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LA CALENDAR07.01 The Adicts @ Key Club
07.07 Fear Factory w/ 36 Crazyfists, After the Burial, Divine Heresy @ House of Blues Sunset Strip
07.10 The Briggs @ The Troubadour
07.12 Kings of Leon @ Hollywood Bowl
07.17 HARD L.A. feat. MIA, N.E.R.D. Die Antwoord, Flying Lotus, and more @ LA State Historic Park
07.23 Sick of it All @ Key Club
07.24 The Game @ Club nokia
07.30 Three 6 Mafia @ Key Club
07.31 Cool Tour 2010 feat. As I Lay Dying, Underoath, Between The Buried And me @ Hollywood Palladium
07.29-08.01 ESPN Summer X Games 16 @ Staples Center, Nokia Theatre, LA Coliseum and LA Live
Ozzy Osbourne @ House Of Blues
E3
Ozzy Osbourne @ Amoeba Records
E3
Ozzy Osbourne @ House Of Blues
Photos Courtesy of Karen Curley, Harmony Gerber, Sean Myers, Alan Rivera
NOS Energy Drink Gives Away Custom Built Nissan @ E3
Ozzy Osbourne @ Amoeba Records
E3
Ozzy Osbourne @ Amoeba Records
SkINNIESCENELOS AngELES |
NOS Energy Drink Gives Away Custom Built Nissan @ E3
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • 59
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KROQ’S Weenie ROaSt Photos By David Gatson
SkINNIESCENELOS AngELES |
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NITTygRITTy
inK-n-iROn FeStivaL @ the Queen maRy Photos By Harmony Gerber
SkINNIESCENELOS AngELES |
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
Rehab
Playboy Club
Rehab
Rain
Rehab
Photos Courtesy of Joe Fury & 9 Group
Moon
Rehab
Pauly D @ The Palms
Rehab
Moon
SkINNIESCENELAS vEgAS |LV CALENDAR
07.02 Z-Trip, Rain Night Club @ Palms Casino
07.02 Shooter Jennings @ Crown Theater
07.03 One Republic @ mandalay Bay Events Center
07.03 UFC 116 Lesnar vs. Carwin @ MGM Grand Garden
07.04 mike Epps @ The Joint
07.04 Kaskade @ wynn Hotel
07.16 Silversun Pickups w/ Against me!, Henry Clay People @ The Joint
07.17 Ziggy Marley @ Mandalay Bay Resort & Casino
07.18 Thrice @ House of Blues Las Vegas
07.30 Sublime w/ Rome, Matisyahu, Dirty Heads @ Mandalay Bay Beach
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OC CALENDAR
07.01 Boozy Floozy’s Burlesque Show @ Galaxy Theater
07.01 Pinback @ Detroit Bar
07.01 Guttermouth @ The Slidebar
07.03 Dum Dum Girls @ Detroit Bar
07.03 Hootenanny 2010 @ Oak Canyon Ranch, Irvine
07.09 Bad Astronaut @ Chain Reaction
07.14 Kings of Leon @ Verizon Amphitheatre
07.24 311, The Offspring, Pepper @ verizon Amphitheatre
07.24 The Devil wears Prada @ Chain Reaction
08.13 Geren Day, AFI @ Verizon Amphitheatre
08.19 wolfmother @ House of Blues
Sharkeez
The Continental
Sharkeez
Shifty @ The Continental
Sharkeez
Photos Courtesy of Erik Faiivae, Alan Rivera, and Christian Sosa
Sutra
Shifty @ The Continental
Lil Jon @ Sutra
The Continental
Sutra
SkINNIESCENEORAngE COunty |
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • �5
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SD CALENDAR
07.09 kings of Leon @ Cricket Amphitheatre
07.11 wailers @ Sound wave
07.15 91x Loudspeaker Presents Dead Feather moon, The Pheromones, and Italian Japanese @ Belly Up Tavern
07.15 mGmT @ SDSU Open Air Theatre
07.17 Slightly Stoopid with Cypress Hill @ Cricket Amphitheatre
07.22 Comic-Con 2010 @ San Diego Convention Center
07.24 Comedian Aziz Ansari and Adam Corolla @ House of Blues San Diego
07.25 91x presents x-Fest 2010 feat. 311, The Offspring, Cake, Unwritten Law, Pepper, Authority Zero @ Cricket Amphitheatre
07.29 Three 6 Mafia @ 4th and B
Photos Courtesy of Clubdistrict.comSkINNIESCENESAn dIEgO |
voyeur
Intervention @ The Hard Rock
voyeur
Intervention @ The Hard Rock
voyeur
voyeur
Intervention @ The Hard Rock
voyeur
Intervention @ The Hard Rock
voyeur
SKINNIEMAGAZINE.COM • ��
IE CALENDAR07.03 Punk in the Fox: The Adicts, Agent Orange, The Dickies @ Fox Theater
07.09-07.11 Joe Rogan @ Ontario Improv
07.10 Rockstar Energy Mayhem w/ korn, Rob Zombie @ San Manuel
07.10 no Age @ The Glass House
07.17 Thrice @ Fox Theater
07.18 mGmT @ Fox Theater
07.24 Ziggy marley @ Harrah’s
07.24 Scream The Prayer Tour III w/ maylene and the Sons of Disaster, For Today, Blessed by a Broken Heart, and more @ The Glass House
07.29 Swingin’ Utters @ The Vibe
07.30 Pat Benetar w/ Neil Giraldo @ Pechanga Casino & Resort
Toro Sushi
Chronic Tacos Cantina
Sundaze @ The Pool
Chronic Tacos Cantina
Toro Sushi
Photos Courtesy of Erik Faiivae, Tim Sheppard, The ZOG
Chronic Tacos Cantina
Sundaze @ The Pool
Chronic Tacos Cantina
Sundaze @ The Pool
Chronic Tacos Cantina
SkINNIESCENEInLAnd EMPIRE |
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CANCER (Jun 22-Jul 22)If a friend tries to get you to eat some
grain called quinoa, don’t eat it. They boiled some spider carcasses and are trying to
play it off as real food for a good laugh. Blah.
LEO (Jul 23-Aug 23)Leaving a blender careless on the floor in your kitchen while friends visit with little children isn’t smart. The nosy kid will decide to play house and end up slicing their fingers up. Don’t be stupid; clean up!
VIRGO (Aug 24- Sept 23)While it is the “in” thing to smuggle people across state lines in trucks with camper shells, ensure the camper shell is secured prior to running from the police on the freeway. Neglecting this will only lead to the camper shell flying off, smashing the cop’s windshield and throwing all the bodies in the back on the highway, where they get run over and die.
LIBRA (Sept 24-Oct 23)Someone is going to introduce you to a new meaning of “kick rocks” after they beat you up for talking smack. Kindly, they will also shove those hard minerals down your throat to accompany that flapping mouth!
SCOPRIO (Oct 24-Nov 23)Just a reminder in terms of volume for containers: beer bottles are for beer; trash cans are for stuff you want to discard; and toilets are for pee, poop, used condoms and tampons and barf. Attempting to throw-up in a beer bottle goes against the laws of physics and will only end up all over you. Not too hot if trying to get laid that night.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 24-Dec 21)Unless you want your car to catch on fire, do not store flammables in the engine compartment and drive across the country, ok?
CAPRICORN (Dec 22-Jan 20)What might seem like an innocent bush to take a public urination in, is actually located next to a sheriffs rest stop. Neglecting to notice the parked police cars is only going to leave you pissing your pants as you are held up at gun point and slapped with a sex offender charge.
AQUARIUS (Jan 21-Feb 19)Jelly Belly jelly beans are known for unique flavors, but they didn’t warn you about the asshole berry flavor. This disgusting treat will glue itself into your molar where you will saw off your tongue trying to remove the morsel from your mouth. Hope you don’t mind never talking again.
PISCES (Feb 20-Mar 20)If a stranger extends an opened beer can to you with juicy snot ridden spit dripping down the side, this doesn’t really mean they want to be friends. It’s probably best to toss the beverage and walk away.
ARIES (Mar 21-Apr 20)Take a hint. If the person you are dating tells you they are finished with the relationship, let them go. Being an emotional sap and trying to contact and rekindle will only result in their parents showing up to your place, laying the smack down on you. Ouchy and embarrassing!
TAURUS (Apr 21-May 21)Don’t be the first to pass out at the party, because you’ll be waking to a lovely dick slap in the face!
GEMINI (May 22-Jun 21)If you are going to be kind enough to lend a friend $30, don’t drunk dial them an hour late accusing them of taking the money and using it for bad things. This will piss them off and you’ll never see that money again.
words by Eleni Vazquez
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