Seeking Financial Freedom from Financial Dependence and … · 2019-06-12 · 5/2/19 2 Financial Dependence “Reliance on others for nonwork income that creates fear or anxiety of

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Seeking Financial Freedom from Financial Dependence & EnmeshmentJOSH HARRIS, MBA, CFP®

© Josh Harris For education only. Not tax, legal, investment or therapeutic advice.

Josh Harris, MBA, CFP®

Lecturer & CFP® Program Coordinator – Clemson University

Board Member, Treasurer & Regulatory Co-Chair – Financial Therapy Association

Incoming Doctoral Student – Kansas State University

CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™

Accredited Financial Counselor® candidate

Defining TermsFINANCIAL DEPENDENCE & FINANCIAL ENMESHMENT


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Financial Dependence“Reliance on others for nonwork income that creates fear or anxiety of being cutoff, feelings of anger or resentment related to the nonwork income, and a stifling of one’s motivation, passion, and/or drive to succeed” (Klontz et al. 2012, p. 21)

◦ Dependents are needy, clingy, insecure

◦ College students show signs of homesickness, social rejection and roommate conflict◦ Increases in child-parent conflict

◦ Increases in family tension due to economic scarcity


Financial Dependence – an exampleAdult child – 26 years old employed part-time at local hospital.

Child unable to pay rent and all required obligations – yet continues to live above means.

Child requires ongoing assistance from parents and other family members to meet financial obligations.


Financial Enmeshment“Use of money to manipulate a child to satisfy an adult need” (Klontz et. al 2012).

◦ Parent often looks loving, child often seems well-adjusted (extremely mature)

◦ Strained relational dynamics◦ Increased difficulty in child meeting own needs due to caretaker role

◦ Grown children are more likely to continue behavior on their own children


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Financial Enmeshment – an exampleDivorced parent with pre-teen child.

Parent shares with child their own financial anxiety around living within means.

Parent asks child to ask for more money from the other parent.


Interventions


Financial Dependence InterventionsHelp client express dependency needs during meetings◦ Provide reassurance and help to strengthen close/healthy relationships

Help clients distinguish between healthy and unhealthy dependencies◦ Provide reassurance and help to strengthen close/healthy relationships

Model healthy relationships through the use of self-disclosure

Refer to Financial Therapist for deeper work with Financial Dependence

Refer to licensed Mental Health Practitioner for deeper issues of dependence


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Financial Enmeshment InterventionsHelp clients distinguish between healthy and unhealthy behaviors◦ Provide reassurance and help to strengthen healthy behaviors

Provide outlet for parent to express financial frustrations to a professional◦ Email/Phone◦ Journaling

Model healthy relationships through the use of self-disclosure

Refer to Financial Therapist for deeper work with Financial EnmeshmentRefer to licensed Mental Health Practitioner for deeper issues of enmeshment


Money GenogramsFamily tree focused on theme of money - Assists clients thinking through healthy money relationships and identifying issues of dependency and enmeshment.


Case Study


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Case Study – The TuckersDivorced parent with multiple children from multiple marriages

Makes the following comments during meeting:◦ I’m not sure where my money goes each month◦ I’ve had trouble making ends meet and had to pick up a second job

◦ My daughter is behind in making rent payments to me, but they’re expecting another child◦ My youngest daughter resents me for always asking her to ask her dad for more money to cover school

activities


ReferencesDavid J. Mumford & Gerald R. Weeks (2003) The Money Genogram, Journal of Family Psychotherapy, 14:3, 33-44

Gallo, Eileen. Journal of Financial Planning; Denver Vol. 14, Iss. 9, (Sep 2001): 46-48

Klontz, B., Britt, S., Archuleta, K. Editors Financial Therapy, Theory, Research, and Practice (2015). Springer.

Klontz, B., Kahler, R., Klontz, T., Facilitating Financial Health (2016). National Underwriter.


Documents

Seeking Financial Freedom from Financial Dependence and … · 2019-06-12 · 5/2/19 2 Financial Dependence “Reliance on others for nonwork income that creates fear or anxiety of